Scarecrow and Mrs. King (1983–1987): Season 3, Episode 19 - The Boy Who Could Be King - full transcript
An eccentric King, months from death, comes to the states looking for his long lost son as someone else tries to kill him to gain control of his country.
Hey, hey.
Welcome, Your Majesty.
All right!
Onward, Crowley. Margaritas
wait for no man, not even a king, eh?
What's the matter, Crowley?
Don't stop. Come on, let's get going.
Mom wouldn't like you sticking
price tags on the goldfish.
I'm not sticking price tags
on the goldfish, Einstein.
I'm putting them
in a separate bowl.
It's a garage sale, you
don't have to sell your pets.
I thought you were gone, Mom.
My ride didn't pick
me up. I called a cab,
but it never came. So
I'm gonna call again.
Look at this stuff. We'll be
out of the poor house in no time.
I would choose my words
more carefully, darling.
This is only a property tax increase, not
pounding at the door by Simon Legree.
- Mother, did Jerry
from the garage call?
Yeah, he called
right after you left.
He went on and on about
all those mechanical things.
- I didn't understood a word he said.
- How much?
- Three hundred and fifty.
- Oh!
There go the goldfish.
Forget it. The goldfish are
going to be just fine. Hello? Yes.
Uh, this is Mrs. King,
4247 Maplewood.
I called for a cab about half
an hour ago and it still isn't here.
Well, 15 minutes ago
would have been perfect.
But if you could send
it now, I'd appreciate it.
All right. I'm waiting,
thank you. Goodbye.
All right, fellas,
you, uh, have a...
What have you got
all over your hands?
Uh, we put some stainer
on our old baseball bats.
We're going to cash
in on the antique craze.
Oh, fellas. Okay, give
me a kiss. Don't touch me.
- Bye-bye, mother. Have fun.
- Goodbye, sweetheart.
Don't worry about them.
I'll read them their rights.
Good idea.
"Just a simple trade-off," he said.
"Give her the ID phrase, she'll counter.
Give her the money, she'll
give you the microfilm."
- Not so simple.
- No, not so simple.
The phrase was "hold me."
The woman that I
thought was my contact...
turned out to be a vice
cop with the Metro cop shop.
And things got out of hand
pretty quick after that, believe me.
- I hope the transmitter survived.
- Yeah. Well, get the damn thing off of me.
I was supposed to pick
up Amanda an hour ago.
Actually, it shouldn't take but
a couple hours to brief the king.
Make him feel welcome...
and review the world-status
report we complied on Cap D'Far.
This isn't much of
a status report, Billy.
Well, Cap D'Far is
not much of a country.
She's about the size
of Rhode Island...
population of less than a
thousand and strategically a zero.
But King Edmund has a vote in the
U.N. and sometimes we need that vote.
Wait a minute, Billy, it says here that
Cap D'Far's only export is fish bones.
You got it.
The bones are
crushed into a pulp...
that's formed into a product called a
cuttlebone. You see them in bird cages.
Birds use them to
sharpen their beaks.
I said it wasn't
much of a country.
Edmund Spencer is a sovereign king,
but he's not exactly what you have in mind.
Royalty is royalty, Billy.
Well, get lucky?
I hear you had a little run-in with
the boys and girls in blue, Scarecrow.
Girls?
The one who jumped me could go
one-on-one with the Refrigerator and win.
This appears to be
busted, Mr. Stetson.
That's not the only thing.
I take it you didn't tell Francine
everything about King Eddie.
I didn't have the
heart. Poor thing.
Francine sees herself as Grace Kelly
meeting Prince Rainier for the first time.
You didn't tell her about your
last brush with King Eddie?
What was it, about 10 years ago?
You went undercover as his sideman for
the D.C. Jazz Festival. Saxophone, right?
That file is closed, Scarecrow.
What was your code name again?
Uh, Billy the Bopper, something like that?
- Billy Blue Note.
- Heh.
Here, wipe your face.
I'm going to need an M-13
malfunction report on this.
Why don't you fill it out,
Beaman. I'm in a rush.
What did you get in this thing?
- I don't know, champagne, turpentine.
- I won't ask.
Here, a John Doe found at
the municipal refuse center.
Deceased.
Let's see...
Sanded fingerprints
and bent passport.
No Boy Scout.
Which is exactly why State
wants to find out who he is.
And you know how edgy
they can be these days.
Hmm.
The man had this
matchbook with him with
the name "Terry Wall"
written on the inside.
There are three people with
that name in the D.C. area.
- So, check it out.
- All right. I'll get on it.
I'm an hour late
picking Amanda up.
If you're going to meet Amanda, have
her give you a hand. The work is piling up.
Knowing King Eddie, Francine
won't last two rounds with him...
and then I'll have to find
someone to replace her.
What about Billy Blue Note?
Button it.
Hello, Mrs. Marston?
Amanda King has
been trying to reach you.
Ah, I'll bet she has. Heh.
Good morning, Mrs. Marston.
And don't you say anything...
that might make me say
something that I would soon regret.
You know, I have never
understood that expression.
If you're mad enough to say
it, why should you regret it?
Let me just tell you something.
I have a property tax bill
that's due in a few days.
My lawnmower and my station wagon
have made a suicide pact with each other...
and my two boys are gonna have to put
their tiny goldfish on the auction block.
All because somebody who was supposed to
give me a ride to the bank this morning...
to see the loan officer
forgot to pick me up.
I'm sorry. Why don't you
try the agency credit union.
They won't give me a loan.
You have to be a full-time agent.
- We can work it out.
- Oh, come on.
I'll cosign.
- You would?
- Yeah, I sure would.
- Well, thank you very much...
- But I can't do it right now.
I've got a little ID check to
make. You see this fellow here?
- As of right now, he's a John Doe.
- Oh.
And none of the agencies
have anything on him.
But we've got three
leads, so follow me.
- I could use your help. AMANDA:
You have lipstick on your face.
Lipstick.
- Ahem, yeah.
- Oh, uh...
Thank you very
much, Mrs. Marston.
- Uh, really, it's very innocent, uh...
- It's okay. It's not your color anyway.
Go ahead, now.
The gunman was a pro.
A freak accident killed him.
My sources indicate that was a
very clumsy action today, Crowley.
Moscow is not happy.
Moscow is halfway
around the world.
I've got bigger
problems right here.
Your only problem is eliminating
that ludicrous king of yours.
If there is tantalum beneath Cap D'Far,
we want control of the entire island...
without King
Edmund on the throne.
Look, if the doctor's
diagnosis is correct...
Eddie's brain tumor will take
care of him, sooner or later.
We insist on sooner.
You know that.
Later is better. Trust me.
Seems the king came
to the States for more
than the, uh, Jazz
festival and a CAT scan.
What are you saying?
Does this affect our plan?
No, Soriakhof.
We're following the same game
plan, but with a new wrinkle.
- Excuse me?
- Yes, ma'am.
Uh, yes, could you help me, please.
I'm looking for, uh, 3085 Danton Street.
- This is it.
- Uh... Something wrong?
I'm sorry, there must be some mistake.
I'm looking for the Cap D'Far Embassy.
Uh-huh, well, that's the
embassy, apartment 114.
No, I don't think you understand.
I said I'm looking for an embassy.
As I said, ma'am, that is
the Cap D'Far Embassy.
And that is her king,
Edmund Spencer.
I don't believe it.
I'll be happy to introduce
you to His Majesty if you like...
or maybe I can help.
Lester Crowley,
ambassador from Cap D'Far.
Mr. Wall, would you just take
a minute to look at this picture?
Don't you think I know who
you are and what you're up to?
All I'm trying to do is find out if you
know who the dead man is in this picture.
Pal, you're wasting your time...
with a stupid story of some corpse
having my name in his pocket.
You'll say you're a cop, I should
go to the station to identify this guy.
- No. You got this all wrong.
- The minute we leave...
one of your buddies comes out of
the bushes and repossesses my truck.
What?
Look, I'm tired of
being hassled, all right?
No more stories.
- Just take the truck.
- Believe me, I...
Oh! Oh.
I'm sorry. Uh, this greasy sucker
just slipped right out of my hand.
- This never happened before.
- Heh, yeah.
- Do you mind?
- No.
Anything that you could tell
us would really be a big help.
Listen, doll-face, you don't
have to play games with T. Wall.
Don't be embarrassed.
Shoe guys and lonely ladies
often get together over inventory...
Look, could you just take a
look at this picture, please?
Please, you better be careful.
I've got an extremely
jealous old lady.
Oh, you really
have the wrong idea.
Okay.
The neighbor says that Terry
Wall does live in that brick house.
I don't believe this. Ten
years of international intrigue...
and I'm playing tag with a psychotic
truck owner and a Romeo shoe salesman.
The kid will probably
turn out to be Damian.
There's the house, Your Majesty.
Ah. I don't know.
I don't like the vibrations.
That's probably him.
What do you want to do?
I don't know. I'm thinking.
The direct approach didn't work.
Let's wait and
talk to the boy first.
- Follow him while I think of a new angle.
- Right.
Okay, look, we can't
just follow him all day.
Yeah, he's just a kid.
Look, let's talk
to his mother first.
- So why don't you let me drive.
- Okay.
I don't like that much.
- What?
- That car.
Hey, wait a minute,
I want to talk to you.
- That can't be Eddie?
- Oh.
Terry, hold up, son.
I'm sorry about that.
I want to talk to you.
- Are you all right?
- What's going on?
Get away from him!
What's the matter with you?
- Are you out of your mind?
- Get out of here, hurry up!
You're sure you've never
seen this guy before?
Nope. He sure was weird, though.
- You gonna be all right?
- Yeah. The front wheel isn't. Blew a tire.
Hmm.
- You really swing a mean purse, lady.
- I'm a mother. That's just instinct.
- Anyway, take care.
- All right. Be careful.
- See you.
- Bye-bye.
You know who the guy
was that you clobbered?
- No, who?
- It was Edmund Spencer.
- Who's that?
- The King of Cap D'Far.
- What?
- Yeah, Scarecrow to Melrose.
Yeah, mm-hm, I'll wait.
- That guy was a king?
- Yes.
Where is Cap D'Far?
Cap D'Far is a practically
nonexistent country.
He comes here every couple of
years to play at the D.C. Jazz Festival...
and to charm the U.S.
out of a little foreign aid.
Now, wait just a minute.
What was he doing
following that kid?
He was no ordinary kid.
He is a kid whose name was
in the pocket of a dead hit man.
Yeah, Billy, Scarecrow.
Something very strange is going
on with your friend King Eddie.
He's supposed to be rehearsing for
the festival at the Civic Center Club.
Why don't you get down there and
have Amanda speak to the boy's mother.
Billy, King Eddie is a friend
of the State Department.
Now, if he's in any
way tied to the John
Doe that they pulled
out of the city dump...
it is trouble, any
way you toss it.
There is one person that I know
of who could get close to him.
No. No, don't even suggest it.
When you were assigned to him, he
never knew your connection with the agency.
You could use the same cover.
Ah!
All right, I guess I can
dust off the old ax off.
Good, I know you'd do it.
Billy, if there's a connection
between the dead man and the king...
then this is a whole
new ball game.
I'll handle it. Why don't you
go home and clean yourself up.
Yeah, I'll do that. And I'll have you know
I'm putting in for hazard pay on this one.
Well, Francine, uh, I'm sorry I didn't
warn you about the king's lifestyle.
Style? Oh no, this has
nothing to do with style.
The next time you send me out to
meet royalty, I'll know what to wear.
I'll wear a Hawaiian
shirt and a bota bag.
Think you got problems?
Just be glad you
don't play saxophone.
I can't believe it, Crowley. I've
waited so long to see my son...
and then I end up scaring him to death
and getting mugged by some crazy broad.
It's all that bad karma,
man. It's catching up to me.
Sir, you should
be in bed, resting.
Why not pass on
this rehearsal...
and let me make arrangements
for you to talk with the boy.
Thank you, that's very kind and I dig
it. But no, let me worry about the boy.
You worry about
getting us some ladies...
and some 90-horsepower
blenders for the party tonight.
But, sir, your health.
Crowley, go back to the embassy and
order some party hats or something, eh?
Well, go on.
All right, guys,
something in E-flat?
One, two... What
are you doing here?
Our engineers at the
Institute of Metallurgy...
have finished analyzing those
core samples from Cap D'Far.
- Good stuff, huh?
- Yes, Mr. Crowley, good stuff.
Better than anyone could
have imagined, in fact.
- A little bonus might be in order.
- Don't start with me.
We're not bartering
cuttlebone curios here.
We have a deal.
Things change.
Mr. Crowley, you are a very
insignificant part of this operation.
If you become a problem, we may suddenly
run out of patience and generosity.
Understood?
Oh. Ahem.
The king's illness
will take care of him.
The boy, though, is a problem...
particularly if he were
to return to Cap D'Far.
He won't.
I know.
I'm going to personally
make sure of that.
Hello, Mrs. Wall?
Yes, can I help you?
I'm sorry. I don't mean to
stare, but you look so familiar.
- Uh, a lot of people tell me that.
- Well, I am very sorry.
Excuse me, my
name is Amanda King.
I was, um, down the street when
your son, Terry, had the accident...
- You must be the lady with the purse.
- Heh, yeah, that's me.
- Terry hasn't stopped talking about it.
- I know now.
You're Veronica, uh, Armstrong from
the soap opera. The laugh gave you away.
- Hospital Romance.
- Uh-huh.
- You've got a good memory.
- Oh.
- You still watch?
- No, but my mother does.
She's gonna be crazy when I tell
her Nurse Veronica lives in Arlington.
Oh, I admit, it's fun to be
recognized after all these years.
Hmm, yeah. Whatever
happened to Dr. Berkowitz?
Wasn't it Dr. Berkowitz,
the psychiatrist...
Oh, he died right
after I left the show.
It was either an x-ray machine
falling on him or the gout that did him in.
Oh, no, it was the x-ray machine
because that was no accident.
All right.
Hey, like the phoenix
rising from the ashes.
It's my main man,
Billy Blue Note.
- Good to see you, king.
- Hey!
Every time I hit town for the fest, I try
looking you up, but no Billy Blue Note.
It's like you just disappeared
into the night, BBN.
Well, I, uh, stopped playing a
while and did some traveling.
Oh, man, we've got
some rapping to do.
But first, BBN, how about
another big hug, huh?
Let's play something nice. You
guys know Billy Blue Note, don't you?
Look, king, the only reason I came up
here is because I heard you were in town.
Yes, well, it's like Thelonius
himself sent you down.
Man, I've got some heavy
stuff coming down on me...
and you're just the man I
need to conference with.
But first, let's two old buds
play something nice, huh?
Just remember,
it's been a long time.
With amigos, it's
always like yesterday.
All right, our favorite, in G.
One, two. A one, two, three.
Wonder where they hang
the decorating awards.
Hmm.
"Bart Williams Blows His Horn."
Class.
Aha.
The world-famous lettuce vault.
No price too high for security.
Iron 83.2 percent.
Manganese 16.8 percent.
Why would a dead man have
Terry's name in his pocket?
That's what we'll try to find out.
You sure he's going to be here?
After he finishes his deliveries,
he usually comes for a milkshake.
- Who were those men who tried to stop him?
- You're never gonna believe this.
But it was the King of a little
out-of-the-way country called Cap D'Far.
- Oh, my God, Edmund Spencer.
- You know King Edmund?
A double dog, chili fries...
- There he is.
- And a Chocko Blocko shake.
Thanks.
Don't say a word,
just come with me.
- Uh, no, no, don't.
- Ah!
Get in the car, go to the back of the
hamburger stand. Trust me, go on, quick.
Uh, excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm sorry, I think
you got my order.
- Give her the order.
- I'd rather give it to you.
- Unh!
- Come on, come on.
You're sure no one followed
you? Good work, Amanda.
No, don't take him home. Take
him directly to my apartment.
The key is under
the potted palm.
Yeah, I'll get back there as
soon as I can. Don't worry.
Calm down.
Good work.
- That was Amanda.
- Hmm.
Some guy just tried to nab
Terry Wall at a hamburger stand.
Oh, and Amanda scared them off?
Well, the guy ended up on the wrong end of
a Chocko Blocko shake, and they lost him.
Huh?
That's what she said,
don't ask me to explain.
Lee, if it doesn't work out for you here in
the agency, I would suggest pharmacology.
Your handwriting is
delightfully hieroglyphic.
I didn't have time to cross my T's or dot
my I's, T.P. Now, do you know what that is?
Depending on how one
interprets your writing...
uh, it could be the formula
for denture adhesive...
synthetic marshmallow
topping, or tantalum.
- Tantalum? The strategic metal?
- Yeah.
The most corrosive-resistant
metal known to man.
It's very essential for
nuclear reactors, jets, missiles.
- It's very important stuff.
- Damn hard to find too.
Yeah. Right again. Only three countries
in the world have limited reserves.
About a week ago, an unconfirmed
report came down the pipe...
about the Russians discovering a
new source of tantalum, and a lot of it.
Oh, then if your
hieroglyphics are correct...
little, teeny, weeny, Cap
D'Far is absolutely loaded.
King Edmund is
sitting right on top of it.
Hey!
The chicks are running the bulls
in Pamplona, and I was the bull.
So I noticed.
- Are you feeling all right?
- Oh, I feel fine.
You look a little stale.
Hey, come on, get outside, a little
of this champagne, and join the party.
Speaking of champagne,
I really think you...
Lockwood Neurological.
Stand back, don't crowd.
What are you saying?
What's the problem?
The problem is
there is no solution.
It's Tapsville, BBN.
Time to play the coda one more
time and head for home, baby.
Make sense. What's wrong?
Eddy? Eddy?
They've got the king stabilized.
More shock than anything else.
I guess he hadn't been sleeping
for the last three or four days.
They don't even want
to keep him overnight.
He was due for some testing today,
but then he postponed to have a party.
What sort of testing?
They said confidential, so I
didn't want to get official on them.
But this is a neurological facility.
This is where he wanted to come.
Billy, did he say anything about
discovering tantalum in Cap D'Far?
The only thing he told me
was that he might be dying.
- Strange.
- Very.
A John Doe who
might be a hit man...
is found with the name of
a paperboy in his pocket.
The king of a seemingly useless country is
trying to make contact with the same boy.
Now you tell me that the
kid almost got snatched.
Yup.
What ties this all together?
It has to be the tantalum.
No argument.
I'll stay here till the king
regains consciousness.
Get back to your apartment
and talk to that boy.
Okay.
This is the third time
we've run into each other.
I'm beginning to
doubt it's a coincidence.
It isn't. We're with the agency.
What were you and King Edmund up
to when you stopped that paperboy?
As the ambassador from Cap
D'Far, I have diplomatic privileges...
which were trampled upon by your
friend when he broke into our embassy.
I'll be filing a protest.
I just might wrap your
diplomatic privileges
around your neck
and give them a twist.
- What's your connection to Terry Wall?
- Ask the king.
Let him go, Lee. Let him go.
I'll talk to Edmund,
if I get a chance.
To make a long story short, Edmund Spencer
is my former husband. Terry's father.
- Does Terry know?
- I didn't want to complicate his life.
As far as he knows, his father was a
musician who died shortly after his birth.
And until now the king hasn't
ever tried to contact him?
Oh, sure. He used to phone
every week begging to see him...
and as hard as it
was, I always said no.
I guess I was afraid he'd
take Terry back to Cap D'Far.
And when everything else
fell apart, my son was all I had.
I just couldn't take the chance.
I met Edmund in Monte
Carlo one glorious summer...
when I was young and
ready for something.
Oh, Eddie was something.
It sort of felt like a B-movie version of
the Prince Rainier-Grace Kelly story.
Terry was on the way
before I set foot on Cap D'Far.
Five hundred square miles
of sand lizards and gull guano.
That, and a steady diet of Miles
Davis sort of took the shine off the apple.
Listen, Sandra, Terry may
be in very grave danger.
A metal called tantalum has
been discovered on Cap D'Far.
We need it for missiles, jet
engines. So do the Soviets.
Whoever controls Cap
D'Far can name his own price.
- What's Terry got to do with this?
- Everything. Terry is heir to the throne.
- No one has to know that.
- I'm afraid they already do.
Remember the dead man
had Terry's name in his pocket.
And they just tried to grab
him at the hamburger stand.
He's a boy, for God's sake.
- And a prince...
whose father is a king who has a seat
at the U.N. and an embassy here in D.C.
Now, Edmund wants Terry to
wear that crown after he's gone.
That's why he tried to contact
him without you interfering.
Terry?
Terry?
Some vitamin A for my
saxophone-playing spy?
Oh, you really had me
fooled, Billy Blue Note.
- Nothing personal, Your Majesty.
- It's all right.
Now, about the tantalum. You really didn't
know it was discovered in your country?
Well, rocks are rocks, man. It must have
been the engineers I hired from Colorado...
to look for water who found it.
Well, then, why didn't you get the
engineering company's assay report?
Everything from the States
passes through the embassy first.
Then your ambassador
was the only one...
- that knew about the tantalum.
- Well, sure, but Crowley's george.
We'll see.
I'm having the agency
doing a head-to-toe on him.
I thought I was leaving my son his
heritage, and he ends up in this mess.
This is not the way to
become father of the year.
You're positive that agent
saw the assay report?
I'm not going to
assume he didn't.
What is the American expression?
"Drop back 10 and punt"?
We've been dealt a better hand.
Or we could dig in
and take them both out.
I figured you'd be bigger.
With, um, dark curly hair.
I used to have
dark, curly hair...
when I was your age.
- Are you really a king?
- That's what it says on my license.
Listen, Terry, this is not the
way I wanted this to go down.
Of course not. We were
going to get together...
toss a football around...
maybe catch a movie,
then get some pizza, right?
Spend an hour
catching up on a lifetime.
All right.
All right, you take your best
shot, son. Yes, I've earned it.
- Forget it.
- No, you stay. You stay. Don't go away.
Listen to me, we've got
to start somewhere, huh?
- Okay.
- Okay.
Start by telling me how
come I never heard about you?
Never saw you?
- Never knew I had a father who was a king?
- Yes, well...
Your mother thought it
would be easier for you...
if you didn't have to worry about
some father who is 8000 miles away.
She must have been right, heh.
You look like
quite a together kid.
God, this is weird.
Yeah. Real weird.
I heard about that man
that tried to get you.
I never would have come here if I thought
anything was going to happen to you.
I'm okay, really.
I tried to look up Cap
D'Far in the encyclopedia.
- It's not there.
- Ha, ha.
I keep forgetting to send back that
questionnaire to the encyclopedia people.
But it's no biggie.
Do you like music?
- Yeah, sometimes.
- Good. Good.
Are you really dying?
Ah, there are worse things.
A noble attitude, Your Majesty.
This is Melrose here.
Priority 1, please.
Abort, abort. The subject has just
arrived. Thank you, over and out.
- Terry?
- Never showed up.
- Where's Amanda?
- Behind me with Sandra.
I've got some interesting info
from the king's doctor. Hmm.
The king is suffering from
an overload of Vitamin A?
- Is that all?
- Apparently, too much vitamin A...
causes a condition that mimics
the early signs of a brain tumor.
Heh, you'd better be careful how you break
the news to him, huh? It might do him in.
Amanda, look, they've got Terry.
No!
- Stop.
- Let him go.
Get in. Come on.
Come on, come on!
- What is it?
- Follow the van.
Go.
How long before we're airborne?
Fifteen minutes. We'll
be cruising at 12,000 feet.
High enough. You won't
feel a thing when you hit.
Look, look. You can have me and
all the rocks you want on Cap D'Far.
- Just leave them alone.
- Don't try to be heroic, Eddie.
It's so uncharacteristic.
All right, get him inside. Move.
Inside.
- We'd better go around the back.
- Yeah.
- Oh, Eddie, are you all right?
- Oh, I'm fine.
I just put a down payment
on the ranch, Sandra.
Being alive, in any
condition, is groovy.
Besides, I always wanted
to do something for my son.
Now, let's figure out how we
can get out of this mess, huh?
Amanda, you stay here in case...
- we need you to go get some help.
- Right.
Help! Help! Something's
happened to the king!
- Please help us!
- He stopped breathing!
- Call a doctor. Please!
- Help! Please, help!
The man is dying.
Stop right there.
I said stop!
Tsk, he took the keys.
Crowley.
Hold it.
This way.
Don't anyone even breathe hard.
No one is going anywhere this time.
This is between us, Crowley.
- That's far enough, Crowley.
Hold it there.
Now, you let us go,
or I'm going to shoot.
You're not going to make it out of
here, Crowley, so hand the gun over now.
Look, all you need
is me. Let them go.
I'm warning you.
Crowley!
Amanda.
- Eddie, you hit bad?
- Heh, everything is cool, BBN.
Oh, Eddie.
You don't follow
orders very well.
Well, I know, I'll
try to work on that.
- See you later.
- Yeah.
Okay.
Come on.
It's true. Cap D'Far was
first settled by swashbucklers.
Mutinous swashbucklers, mind
you, but bloody big heroes, all of them.
Well, we've all
got it in the blood.
Guess they weren't too
hot at dodging bullets.
Your father always took chances.
- Some things never change.
- Yes, and some things do.
Did you ask your mom?
Ask me what?
Well, the king...
Dad wants me to
come to Cap D'Far.
I'd really like to go, Mom.
- For how long?
- A week, in June.
The surfing is rotten
the rest of the year.
What are you doing in June?
Hey, Billy, my man! - Ha, ha.
It's an hour
before curtain, bro.
Sorry, Eddie.
Billy Blue Note is retired.
Oh, well, not if his country wants
some of the tantalum I've got.
No way, man. No way.
I see you took a firm stand,
Billy Blue Note. Nice work.
If we'll keep diplomatic
relations with Cap D'Far...
you're gonna have to
learn how to play this thing.
One, two, three.
I got a feeling everybody is
going to live happily ever after.
Welcome, Your Majesty.
All right!
Onward, Crowley. Margaritas
wait for no man, not even a king, eh?
What's the matter, Crowley?
Don't stop. Come on, let's get going.
Mom wouldn't like you sticking
price tags on the goldfish.
I'm not sticking price tags
on the goldfish, Einstein.
I'm putting them
in a separate bowl.
It's a garage sale, you
don't have to sell your pets.
I thought you were gone, Mom.
My ride didn't pick
me up. I called a cab,
but it never came. So
I'm gonna call again.
Look at this stuff. We'll be
out of the poor house in no time.
I would choose my words
more carefully, darling.
This is only a property tax increase, not
pounding at the door by Simon Legree.
- Mother, did Jerry
from the garage call?
Yeah, he called
right after you left.
He went on and on about
all those mechanical things.
- I didn't understood a word he said.
- How much?
- Three hundred and fifty.
- Oh!
There go the goldfish.
Forget it. The goldfish are
going to be just fine. Hello? Yes.
Uh, this is Mrs. King,
4247 Maplewood.
I called for a cab about half
an hour ago and it still isn't here.
Well, 15 minutes ago
would have been perfect.
But if you could send
it now, I'd appreciate it.
All right. I'm waiting,
thank you. Goodbye.
All right, fellas,
you, uh, have a...
What have you got
all over your hands?
Uh, we put some stainer
on our old baseball bats.
We're going to cash
in on the antique craze.
Oh, fellas. Okay, give
me a kiss. Don't touch me.
- Bye-bye, mother. Have fun.
- Goodbye, sweetheart.
Don't worry about them.
I'll read them their rights.
Good idea.
"Just a simple trade-off," he said.
"Give her the ID phrase, she'll counter.
Give her the money, she'll
give you the microfilm."
- Not so simple.
- No, not so simple.
The phrase was "hold me."
The woman that I
thought was my contact...
turned out to be a vice
cop with the Metro cop shop.
And things got out of hand
pretty quick after that, believe me.
- I hope the transmitter survived.
- Yeah. Well, get the damn thing off of me.
I was supposed to pick
up Amanda an hour ago.
Actually, it shouldn't take but
a couple hours to brief the king.
Make him feel welcome...
and review the world-status
report we complied on Cap D'Far.
This isn't much of
a status report, Billy.
Well, Cap D'Far is
not much of a country.
She's about the size
of Rhode Island...
population of less than a
thousand and strategically a zero.
But King Edmund has a vote in the
U.N. and sometimes we need that vote.
Wait a minute, Billy, it says here that
Cap D'Far's only export is fish bones.
You got it.
The bones are
crushed into a pulp...
that's formed into a product called a
cuttlebone. You see them in bird cages.
Birds use them to
sharpen their beaks.
I said it wasn't
much of a country.
Edmund Spencer is a sovereign king,
but he's not exactly what you have in mind.
Royalty is royalty, Billy.
Well, get lucky?
I hear you had a little run-in with
the boys and girls in blue, Scarecrow.
Girls?
The one who jumped me could go
one-on-one with the Refrigerator and win.
This appears to be
busted, Mr. Stetson.
That's not the only thing.
I take it you didn't tell Francine
everything about King Eddie.
I didn't have the
heart. Poor thing.
Francine sees herself as Grace Kelly
meeting Prince Rainier for the first time.
You didn't tell her about your
last brush with King Eddie?
What was it, about 10 years ago?
You went undercover as his sideman for
the D.C. Jazz Festival. Saxophone, right?
That file is closed, Scarecrow.
What was your code name again?
Uh, Billy the Bopper, something like that?
- Billy Blue Note.
- Heh.
Here, wipe your face.
I'm going to need an M-13
malfunction report on this.
Why don't you fill it out,
Beaman. I'm in a rush.
What did you get in this thing?
- I don't know, champagne, turpentine.
- I won't ask.
Here, a John Doe found at
the municipal refuse center.
Deceased.
Let's see...
Sanded fingerprints
and bent passport.
No Boy Scout.
Which is exactly why State
wants to find out who he is.
And you know how edgy
they can be these days.
Hmm.
The man had this
matchbook with him with
the name "Terry Wall"
written on the inside.
There are three people with
that name in the D.C. area.
- So, check it out.
- All right. I'll get on it.
I'm an hour late
picking Amanda up.
If you're going to meet Amanda, have
her give you a hand. The work is piling up.
Knowing King Eddie, Francine
won't last two rounds with him...
and then I'll have to find
someone to replace her.
What about Billy Blue Note?
Button it.
Hello, Mrs. Marston?
Amanda King has
been trying to reach you.
Ah, I'll bet she has. Heh.
Good morning, Mrs. Marston.
And don't you say anything...
that might make me say
something that I would soon regret.
You know, I have never
understood that expression.
If you're mad enough to say
it, why should you regret it?
Let me just tell you something.
I have a property tax bill
that's due in a few days.
My lawnmower and my station wagon
have made a suicide pact with each other...
and my two boys are gonna have to put
their tiny goldfish on the auction block.
All because somebody who was supposed to
give me a ride to the bank this morning...
to see the loan officer
forgot to pick me up.
I'm sorry. Why don't you
try the agency credit union.
They won't give me a loan.
You have to be a full-time agent.
- We can work it out.
- Oh, come on.
I'll cosign.
- You would?
- Yeah, I sure would.
- Well, thank you very much...
- But I can't do it right now.
I've got a little ID check to
make. You see this fellow here?
- As of right now, he's a John Doe.
- Oh.
And none of the agencies
have anything on him.
But we've got three
leads, so follow me.
- I could use your help. AMANDA:
You have lipstick on your face.
Lipstick.
- Ahem, yeah.
- Oh, uh...
Thank you very
much, Mrs. Marston.
- Uh, really, it's very innocent, uh...
- It's okay. It's not your color anyway.
Go ahead, now.
The gunman was a pro.
A freak accident killed him.
My sources indicate that was a
very clumsy action today, Crowley.
Moscow is not happy.
Moscow is halfway
around the world.
I've got bigger
problems right here.
Your only problem is eliminating
that ludicrous king of yours.
If there is tantalum beneath Cap D'Far,
we want control of the entire island...
without King
Edmund on the throne.
Look, if the doctor's
diagnosis is correct...
Eddie's brain tumor will take
care of him, sooner or later.
We insist on sooner.
You know that.
Later is better. Trust me.
Seems the king came
to the States for more
than the, uh, Jazz
festival and a CAT scan.
What are you saying?
Does this affect our plan?
No, Soriakhof.
We're following the same game
plan, but with a new wrinkle.
- Excuse me?
- Yes, ma'am.
Uh, yes, could you help me, please.
I'm looking for, uh, 3085 Danton Street.
- This is it.
- Uh... Something wrong?
I'm sorry, there must be some mistake.
I'm looking for the Cap D'Far Embassy.
Uh-huh, well, that's the
embassy, apartment 114.
No, I don't think you understand.
I said I'm looking for an embassy.
As I said, ma'am, that is
the Cap D'Far Embassy.
And that is her king,
Edmund Spencer.
I don't believe it.
I'll be happy to introduce
you to His Majesty if you like...
or maybe I can help.
Lester Crowley,
ambassador from Cap D'Far.
Mr. Wall, would you just take
a minute to look at this picture?
Don't you think I know who
you are and what you're up to?
All I'm trying to do is find out if you
know who the dead man is in this picture.
Pal, you're wasting your time...
with a stupid story of some corpse
having my name in his pocket.
You'll say you're a cop, I should
go to the station to identify this guy.
- No. You got this all wrong.
- The minute we leave...
one of your buddies comes out of
the bushes and repossesses my truck.
What?
Look, I'm tired of
being hassled, all right?
No more stories.
- Just take the truck.
- Believe me, I...
Oh! Oh.
I'm sorry. Uh, this greasy sucker
just slipped right out of my hand.
- This never happened before.
- Heh, yeah.
- Do you mind?
- No.
Anything that you could tell
us would really be a big help.
Listen, doll-face, you don't
have to play games with T. Wall.
Don't be embarrassed.
Shoe guys and lonely ladies
often get together over inventory...
Look, could you just take a
look at this picture, please?
Please, you better be careful.
I've got an extremely
jealous old lady.
Oh, you really
have the wrong idea.
Okay.
The neighbor says that Terry
Wall does live in that brick house.
I don't believe this. Ten
years of international intrigue...
and I'm playing tag with a psychotic
truck owner and a Romeo shoe salesman.
The kid will probably
turn out to be Damian.
There's the house, Your Majesty.
Ah. I don't know.
I don't like the vibrations.
That's probably him.
What do you want to do?
I don't know. I'm thinking.
The direct approach didn't work.
Let's wait and
talk to the boy first.
- Follow him while I think of a new angle.
- Right.
Okay, look, we can't
just follow him all day.
Yeah, he's just a kid.
Look, let's talk
to his mother first.
- So why don't you let me drive.
- Okay.
I don't like that much.
- What?
- That car.
Hey, wait a minute,
I want to talk to you.
- That can't be Eddie?
- Oh.
Terry, hold up, son.
I'm sorry about that.
I want to talk to you.
- Are you all right?
- What's going on?
Get away from him!
What's the matter with you?
- Are you out of your mind?
- Get out of here, hurry up!
You're sure you've never
seen this guy before?
Nope. He sure was weird, though.
- You gonna be all right?
- Yeah. The front wheel isn't. Blew a tire.
Hmm.
- You really swing a mean purse, lady.
- I'm a mother. That's just instinct.
- Anyway, take care.
- All right. Be careful.
- See you.
- Bye-bye.
You know who the guy
was that you clobbered?
- No, who?
- It was Edmund Spencer.
- Who's that?
- The King of Cap D'Far.
- What?
- Yeah, Scarecrow to Melrose.
Yeah, mm-hm, I'll wait.
- That guy was a king?
- Yes.
Where is Cap D'Far?
Cap D'Far is a practically
nonexistent country.
He comes here every couple of
years to play at the D.C. Jazz Festival...
and to charm the U.S.
out of a little foreign aid.
Now, wait just a minute.
What was he doing
following that kid?
He was no ordinary kid.
He is a kid whose name was
in the pocket of a dead hit man.
Yeah, Billy, Scarecrow.
Something very strange is going
on with your friend King Eddie.
He's supposed to be rehearsing for
the festival at the Civic Center Club.
Why don't you get down there and
have Amanda speak to the boy's mother.
Billy, King Eddie is a friend
of the State Department.
Now, if he's in any
way tied to the John
Doe that they pulled
out of the city dump...
it is trouble, any
way you toss it.
There is one person that I know
of who could get close to him.
No. No, don't even suggest it.
When you were assigned to him, he
never knew your connection with the agency.
You could use the same cover.
Ah!
All right, I guess I can
dust off the old ax off.
Good, I know you'd do it.
Billy, if there's a connection
between the dead man and the king...
then this is a whole
new ball game.
I'll handle it. Why don't you
go home and clean yourself up.
Yeah, I'll do that. And I'll have you know
I'm putting in for hazard pay on this one.
Well, Francine, uh, I'm sorry I didn't
warn you about the king's lifestyle.
Style? Oh no, this has
nothing to do with style.
The next time you send me out to
meet royalty, I'll know what to wear.
I'll wear a Hawaiian
shirt and a bota bag.
Think you got problems?
Just be glad you
don't play saxophone.
I can't believe it, Crowley. I've
waited so long to see my son...
and then I end up scaring him to death
and getting mugged by some crazy broad.
It's all that bad karma,
man. It's catching up to me.
Sir, you should
be in bed, resting.
Why not pass on
this rehearsal...
and let me make arrangements
for you to talk with the boy.
Thank you, that's very kind and I dig
it. But no, let me worry about the boy.
You worry about
getting us some ladies...
and some 90-horsepower
blenders for the party tonight.
But, sir, your health.
Crowley, go back to the embassy and
order some party hats or something, eh?
Well, go on.
All right, guys,
something in E-flat?
One, two... What
are you doing here?
Our engineers at the
Institute of Metallurgy...
have finished analyzing those
core samples from Cap D'Far.
- Good stuff, huh?
- Yes, Mr. Crowley, good stuff.
Better than anyone could
have imagined, in fact.
- A little bonus might be in order.
- Don't start with me.
We're not bartering
cuttlebone curios here.
We have a deal.
Things change.
Mr. Crowley, you are a very
insignificant part of this operation.
If you become a problem, we may suddenly
run out of patience and generosity.
Understood?
Oh. Ahem.
The king's illness
will take care of him.
The boy, though, is a problem...
particularly if he were
to return to Cap D'Far.
He won't.
I know.
I'm going to personally
make sure of that.
Hello, Mrs. Wall?
Yes, can I help you?
I'm sorry. I don't mean to
stare, but you look so familiar.
- Uh, a lot of people tell me that.
- Well, I am very sorry.
Excuse me, my
name is Amanda King.
I was, um, down the street when
your son, Terry, had the accident...
- You must be the lady with the purse.
- Heh, yeah, that's me.
- Terry hasn't stopped talking about it.
- I know now.
You're Veronica, uh, Armstrong from
the soap opera. The laugh gave you away.
- Hospital Romance.
- Uh-huh.
- You've got a good memory.
- Oh.
- You still watch?
- No, but my mother does.
She's gonna be crazy when I tell
her Nurse Veronica lives in Arlington.
Oh, I admit, it's fun to be
recognized after all these years.
Hmm, yeah. Whatever
happened to Dr. Berkowitz?
Wasn't it Dr. Berkowitz,
the psychiatrist...
Oh, he died right
after I left the show.
It was either an x-ray machine
falling on him or the gout that did him in.
Oh, no, it was the x-ray machine
because that was no accident.
All right.
Hey, like the phoenix
rising from the ashes.
It's my main man,
Billy Blue Note.
- Good to see you, king.
- Hey!
Every time I hit town for the fest, I try
looking you up, but no Billy Blue Note.
It's like you just disappeared
into the night, BBN.
Well, I, uh, stopped playing a
while and did some traveling.
Oh, man, we've got
some rapping to do.
But first, BBN, how about
another big hug, huh?
Let's play something nice. You
guys know Billy Blue Note, don't you?
Look, king, the only reason I came up
here is because I heard you were in town.
Yes, well, it's like Thelonius
himself sent you down.
Man, I've got some heavy
stuff coming down on me...
and you're just the man I
need to conference with.
But first, let's two old buds
play something nice, huh?
Just remember,
it's been a long time.
With amigos, it's
always like yesterday.
All right, our favorite, in G.
One, two. A one, two, three.
Wonder where they hang
the decorating awards.
Hmm.
"Bart Williams Blows His Horn."
Class.
Aha.
The world-famous lettuce vault.
No price too high for security.
Iron 83.2 percent.
Manganese 16.8 percent.
Why would a dead man have
Terry's name in his pocket?
That's what we'll try to find out.
You sure he's going to be here?
After he finishes his deliveries,
he usually comes for a milkshake.
- Who were those men who tried to stop him?
- You're never gonna believe this.
But it was the King of a little
out-of-the-way country called Cap D'Far.
- Oh, my God, Edmund Spencer.
- You know King Edmund?
A double dog, chili fries...
- There he is.
- And a Chocko Blocko shake.
Thanks.
Don't say a word,
just come with me.
- Uh, no, no, don't.
- Ah!
Get in the car, go to the back of the
hamburger stand. Trust me, go on, quick.
Uh, excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm sorry, I think
you got my order.
- Give her the order.
- I'd rather give it to you.
- Unh!
- Come on, come on.
You're sure no one followed
you? Good work, Amanda.
No, don't take him home. Take
him directly to my apartment.
The key is under
the potted palm.
Yeah, I'll get back there as
soon as I can. Don't worry.
Calm down.
Good work.
- That was Amanda.
- Hmm.
Some guy just tried to nab
Terry Wall at a hamburger stand.
Oh, and Amanda scared them off?
Well, the guy ended up on the wrong end of
a Chocko Blocko shake, and they lost him.
Huh?
That's what she said,
don't ask me to explain.
Lee, if it doesn't work out for you here in
the agency, I would suggest pharmacology.
Your handwriting is
delightfully hieroglyphic.
I didn't have time to cross my T's or dot
my I's, T.P. Now, do you know what that is?
Depending on how one
interprets your writing...
uh, it could be the formula
for denture adhesive...
synthetic marshmallow
topping, or tantalum.
- Tantalum? The strategic metal?
- Yeah.
The most corrosive-resistant
metal known to man.
It's very essential for
nuclear reactors, jets, missiles.
- It's very important stuff.
- Damn hard to find too.
Yeah. Right again. Only three countries
in the world have limited reserves.
About a week ago, an unconfirmed
report came down the pipe...
about the Russians discovering a
new source of tantalum, and a lot of it.
Oh, then if your
hieroglyphics are correct...
little, teeny, weeny, Cap
D'Far is absolutely loaded.
King Edmund is
sitting right on top of it.
Hey!
The chicks are running the bulls
in Pamplona, and I was the bull.
So I noticed.
- Are you feeling all right?
- Oh, I feel fine.
You look a little stale.
Hey, come on, get outside, a little
of this champagne, and join the party.
Speaking of champagne,
I really think you...
Lockwood Neurological.
Stand back, don't crowd.
What are you saying?
What's the problem?
The problem is
there is no solution.
It's Tapsville, BBN.
Time to play the coda one more
time and head for home, baby.
Make sense. What's wrong?
Eddy? Eddy?
They've got the king stabilized.
More shock than anything else.
I guess he hadn't been sleeping
for the last three or four days.
They don't even want
to keep him overnight.
He was due for some testing today,
but then he postponed to have a party.
What sort of testing?
They said confidential, so I
didn't want to get official on them.
But this is a neurological facility.
This is where he wanted to come.
Billy, did he say anything about
discovering tantalum in Cap D'Far?
The only thing he told me
was that he might be dying.
- Strange.
- Very.
A John Doe who
might be a hit man...
is found with the name of
a paperboy in his pocket.
The king of a seemingly useless country is
trying to make contact with the same boy.
Now you tell me that the
kid almost got snatched.
Yup.
What ties this all together?
It has to be the tantalum.
No argument.
I'll stay here till the king
regains consciousness.
Get back to your apartment
and talk to that boy.
Okay.
This is the third time
we've run into each other.
I'm beginning to
doubt it's a coincidence.
It isn't. We're with the agency.
What were you and King Edmund up
to when you stopped that paperboy?
As the ambassador from Cap
D'Far, I have diplomatic privileges...
which were trampled upon by your
friend when he broke into our embassy.
I'll be filing a protest.
I just might wrap your
diplomatic privileges
around your neck
and give them a twist.
- What's your connection to Terry Wall?
- Ask the king.
Let him go, Lee. Let him go.
I'll talk to Edmund,
if I get a chance.
To make a long story short, Edmund Spencer
is my former husband. Terry's father.
- Does Terry know?
- I didn't want to complicate his life.
As far as he knows, his father was a
musician who died shortly after his birth.
And until now the king hasn't
ever tried to contact him?
Oh, sure. He used to phone
every week begging to see him...
and as hard as it
was, I always said no.
I guess I was afraid he'd
take Terry back to Cap D'Far.
And when everything else
fell apart, my son was all I had.
I just couldn't take the chance.
I met Edmund in Monte
Carlo one glorious summer...
when I was young and
ready for something.
Oh, Eddie was something.
It sort of felt like a B-movie version of
the Prince Rainier-Grace Kelly story.
Terry was on the way
before I set foot on Cap D'Far.
Five hundred square miles
of sand lizards and gull guano.
That, and a steady diet of Miles
Davis sort of took the shine off the apple.
Listen, Sandra, Terry may
be in very grave danger.
A metal called tantalum has
been discovered on Cap D'Far.
We need it for missiles, jet
engines. So do the Soviets.
Whoever controls Cap
D'Far can name his own price.
- What's Terry got to do with this?
- Everything. Terry is heir to the throne.
- No one has to know that.
- I'm afraid they already do.
Remember the dead man
had Terry's name in his pocket.
And they just tried to grab
him at the hamburger stand.
He's a boy, for God's sake.
- And a prince...
whose father is a king who has a seat
at the U.N. and an embassy here in D.C.
Now, Edmund wants Terry to
wear that crown after he's gone.
That's why he tried to contact
him without you interfering.
Terry?
Terry?
Some vitamin A for my
saxophone-playing spy?
Oh, you really had me
fooled, Billy Blue Note.
- Nothing personal, Your Majesty.
- It's all right.
Now, about the tantalum. You really didn't
know it was discovered in your country?
Well, rocks are rocks, man. It must have
been the engineers I hired from Colorado...
to look for water who found it.
Well, then, why didn't you get the
engineering company's assay report?
Everything from the States
passes through the embassy first.
Then your ambassador
was the only one...
- that knew about the tantalum.
- Well, sure, but Crowley's george.
We'll see.
I'm having the agency
doing a head-to-toe on him.
I thought I was leaving my son his
heritage, and he ends up in this mess.
This is not the way to
become father of the year.
You're positive that agent
saw the assay report?
I'm not going to
assume he didn't.
What is the American expression?
"Drop back 10 and punt"?
We've been dealt a better hand.
Or we could dig in
and take them both out.
I figured you'd be bigger.
With, um, dark curly hair.
I used to have
dark, curly hair...
when I was your age.
- Are you really a king?
- That's what it says on my license.
Listen, Terry, this is not the
way I wanted this to go down.
Of course not. We were
going to get together...
toss a football around...
maybe catch a movie,
then get some pizza, right?
Spend an hour
catching up on a lifetime.
All right.
All right, you take your best
shot, son. Yes, I've earned it.
- Forget it.
- No, you stay. You stay. Don't go away.
Listen to me, we've got
to start somewhere, huh?
- Okay.
- Okay.
Start by telling me how
come I never heard about you?
Never saw you?
- Never knew I had a father who was a king?
- Yes, well...
Your mother thought it
would be easier for you...
if you didn't have to worry about
some father who is 8000 miles away.
She must have been right, heh.
You look like
quite a together kid.
God, this is weird.
Yeah. Real weird.
I heard about that man
that tried to get you.
I never would have come here if I thought
anything was going to happen to you.
I'm okay, really.
I tried to look up Cap
D'Far in the encyclopedia.
- It's not there.
- Ha, ha.
I keep forgetting to send back that
questionnaire to the encyclopedia people.
But it's no biggie.
Do you like music?
- Yeah, sometimes.
- Good. Good.
Are you really dying?
Ah, there are worse things.
A noble attitude, Your Majesty.
This is Melrose here.
Priority 1, please.
Abort, abort. The subject has just
arrived. Thank you, over and out.
- Terry?
- Never showed up.
- Where's Amanda?
- Behind me with Sandra.
I've got some interesting info
from the king's doctor. Hmm.
The king is suffering from
an overload of Vitamin A?
- Is that all?
- Apparently, too much vitamin A...
causes a condition that mimics
the early signs of a brain tumor.
Heh, you'd better be careful how you break
the news to him, huh? It might do him in.
Amanda, look, they've got Terry.
No!
- Stop.
- Let him go.
Get in. Come on.
Come on, come on!
- What is it?
- Follow the van.
Go.
How long before we're airborne?
Fifteen minutes. We'll
be cruising at 12,000 feet.
High enough. You won't
feel a thing when you hit.
Look, look. You can have me and
all the rocks you want on Cap D'Far.
- Just leave them alone.
- Don't try to be heroic, Eddie.
It's so uncharacteristic.
All right, get him inside. Move.
Inside.
- We'd better go around the back.
- Yeah.
- Oh, Eddie, are you all right?
- Oh, I'm fine.
I just put a down payment
on the ranch, Sandra.
Being alive, in any
condition, is groovy.
Besides, I always wanted
to do something for my son.
Now, let's figure out how we
can get out of this mess, huh?
Amanda, you stay here in case...
- we need you to go get some help.
- Right.
Help! Help! Something's
happened to the king!
- Please help us!
- He stopped breathing!
- Call a doctor. Please!
- Help! Please, help!
The man is dying.
Stop right there.
I said stop!
Tsk, he took the keys.
Crowley.
Hold it.
This way.
Don't anyone even breathe hard.
No one is going anywhere this time.
This is between us, Crowley.
- That's far enough, Crowley.
Hold it there.
Now, you let us go,
or I'm going to shoot.
You're not going to make it out of
here, Crowley, so hand the gun over now.
Look, all you need
is me. Let them go.
I'm warning you.
Crowley!
Amanda.
- Eddie, you hit bad?
- Heh, everything is cool, BBN.
Oh, Eddie.
You don't follow
orders very well.
Well, I know, I'll
try to work on that.
- See you later.
- Yeah.
Okay.
Come on.
It's true. Cap D'Far was
first settled by swashbucklers.
Mutinous swashbucklers, mind
you, but bloody big heroes, all of them.
Well, we've all
got it in the blood.
Guess they weren't too
hot at dodging bullets.
Your father always took chances.
- Some things never change.
- Yes, and some things do.
Did you ask your mom?
Ask me what?
Well, the king...
Dad wants me to
come to Cap D'Far.
I'd really like to go, Mom.
- For how long?
- A week, in June.
The surfing is rotten
the rest of the year.
What are you doing in June?
Hey, Billy, my man! - Ha, ha.
It's an hour
before curtain, bro.
Sorry, Eddie.
Billy Blue Note is retired.
Oh, well, not if his country wants
some of the tantalum I've got.
No way, man. No way.
I see you took a firm stand,
Billy Blue Note. Nice work.
If we'll keep diplomatic
relations with Cap D'Far...
you're gonna have to
learn how to play this thing.
One, two, three.
I got a feeling everybody is
going to live happily ever after.