Saved by the Bell (1989–1992): Season 2, Episode 9 - Jessie's Song - full transcript

Jessie turns to caffeine pills to keep up with her studies and her new singing group, Hot Sundae.

(bell rings)

♪ When I wake up in the morning
and the alarm gives out a warning ♪

♪ I don't think I'll ever
make it on time ♪

♪ By the time I grab my books
and I give myself a look ♪

♪ I'm at the corner just in time
to see the bus fly by ♪

♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

♪ If the teacher pops a test
I know I'm in a mess ♪

♪ And my dog ate
all my homework last night ♪

♪ Ridin' low on my chair,
she won't know that I'm there ♪

♪ If I can hand it in tomorrow
it will be all right ♪



♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell... ♪

♪ It's all right,
'cause I'm saved by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right, 'cause I'm saved
by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right,
'cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

This week is our
geometry midterm.

Hey, I'm not worried, because
I always sit next to smart nerds.

- Hey, guys. How're you doing?
- Hey.

Yuck!
I hate coffee.

Susie, can I have
another cup, please?

So, why are you drinking it?

What else would she do
with the coffee, Zack?

Use your head as a doughnut,
and dunk you in it.

No way. My head would
never fit in the cup.



I'm drinking coffee to stay awake.
I've been up half the night

studying for geometry,
and I still don't get it.

Come on, you're doing all right.

Look, I want to go to Stanford,

and there are people with
straight A's who get turned down.

Send back the coffee,
it's hopeless.

- What's up guys?
- Hey, Slater.

Cramming your pretty
little head with geometry?

Is there a sexist point
to your question?

Well, yeah.
Guys are great at math.

It's just a shame you
weren't born a man.

Yeah, it's a shame you
weren't born one, either.

Hi, guys.
How's it going?

Hey, Jessie, listen.
"I'm So Excited."

I know you're excited,
but try to forget about me.

I'll pray for help.

Jessie, put the books away.
The test isn't until Friday.

- Come on.
- Relax. Let's show her, okay?

♪ Tonight's the night we're
gonna make it happen ♪

♪ Tonight we'll put all
other things aside ♪

♪ Give in this time
and show me some affection ♪

♪ We're going for those
pleasures in the night... ♪

See?

- All right.
- Get down, ladies!

- You guys are great.
- Yeah.

Hey, a friend of my dad
is a record producer,

and he's looking for a girls' group
like New Kids on the Block.

Yeah,
the "New Chicks on the Block."

Thank you,
"New Pig in the Booth."

You guys are terrific. I'll be your
manager. We'll make a fortune.

Oh, come on,
we were just fooling around.

Let me bring you to the recording
company and you can sing for them.

I don't have time. Besides, we just
like to sing in the locker room.

Why not bring the producer
to the girls' locker room?

Why not go to the boys' room
and flush yourself to China?

Mr. Morris, B+.

Should I congratulate you or the
person who was sitting next to you?

Sir, I am shocked.

Lighten up, Z-person.

Kelly, B+.

Lisa, B+.

Jessie, C.

C? C?

C, señorita.
But this is geometry, not Spanish.

(bell rings)

Study hard. I'm off to my tryouts
for "American Gladiators."

A "C?"
I'll never get into Stanford.

Will you calm down?
It's only one quiz.

That's right, Jessie.
You can make it up on the midterm.

Hurry or you'll be late for gym.

Look, Jessie, if you're
worried about that test,

I'll help you study.

Okay. My house at 7:00?

I'll be there.

And stop worrying,
you're pretty smart for a chick.

- Slater!
- See?

Got your mind off it already.

Screech, get your recorder. You're
going to the girl's locker room.

- Why?
- That's where the girls sing.

We're gonna record them.

Oh, no. Do I have to wear
your Aunt Helen's bra again?

Does anyone know how
to bisect the vertex angle

of an isosceles triangle?

Will you stop it, Jessie?
You're gonna make yourself sick.

You know what, Jessie? Don't worry,
everything's gonna be okay.

It's just geometry makes me feel
so stupid. I'm so depressed.

Whenever I'm depressed,
lassie, I sing a song.

That's a great idea, Jessie.
Let's have some fun.

- Who are you?
- Who am I?

Oh, I'm-- I'm--

Sinead O'Connor.

That's a very famous name--

That's the other O'Connor.
She's my niece. She learned from me.

You taught her everything she knows?

Oh, that I did. Now she can clean
toilets with the best of them.

Come on, lassies,
let's cheer up and sing.

Oh, and don't mind me,
I'll just mop around you.

Pretend it's a microphone.

(music plays)
♪ I'm so excited ♪

♪ And I just can't hide it ♪

Angle A is congruent to angle D,

because these alternate
interior angles are congruent.

Will you marry me,
and take the test for me?

You are in trouble.

So anyway, look--

Hi. How you guys doing?
I have great news.

Mr. Dewey got squashed
by a gladiator?

No, better.

The record producer loved
the tape of you girls singing,

and wants to play it
for his boss.

- Hey, that's great!
- What tape, Zack?

Oh, the one of you girls
singing in the locker room.

- We didn't make a tape.
- Oh, you're wrong, lassie.

Sinead O'Connor did.

You violated our privacy?

That's disgusting,
isn't it, Slater?

Oh, yeah. Disgusting, Preppie.
I'm very disappointed in you.

Next time bring me.

The producer thinks
you're the best.

Well, it doesn't matter.
There's a principle here.

He really thinks I'm the best?

Yeah. But don't tell Lisa or Kelly.
They'll get jealous.

- See you guys, have fun.
- Later, man.

Let's get on to parallel lines.

Jessie, I'm wiped. We've been
at this for four hours now.

I'm tired, too.

Oh.

Here, take one of these.

Keep Alert?
What are these for?

I need them to stay awake to study.
I got them today at the drugstore.

They're just like coffee,
except they don't taste as bad.

Jessie, these are a lot
stronger than coffee.

It says here they may be
habit-forming.

They're harmless. They sell
them over the counter.

That doesn't make them safe.
You shouldn't be taking these.

Maybe you're right.

All right then.

Well, see you tomorrow.
Good night.

Good night.

- Slater?
- Yes?

Thank you for helping me.

I'll never wash these lips again.

What am I gonna do?

Jessie, you haven't even
taken the midterm yet.

But I know what's gonna happen.
I'll never get into Stanford.

Oh, calm down, Jessie.

I will write a great letter of
recommendation for you.

You almost have
a straight A average.

Almost is not good
enough for Stanford.

If it will make you feel any better,
I got a C in geometry, too.

- Did you go to Stanford?
- Heck no, they wouldn't take me.

I want to go to Stanford.

I wanted to marry Christie
Brinkley, but it didn't happen.

Look, there are lots of
other good colleges.

I'll help you find one.

Believe it or not, there's even
a college out there for Zack.

If I flunk geometry, that's
probably where I'll wind up.

Zack?!

Hey, Jessie. I thought you
were going to Stanford.

I got a C in geometry.

Surf University was the only
place that would take me.

(conch shell trumpets)

Aloha, wahine, mahalo.

What does that mean?

Who cares?
I'm just here to get a tan.

Well, what would you
like to learn today?

- Nothing.
- That's cool.

This is an outrage.
I demand to learn.

Okay, here's today's math lesson.

Sunblock 20 is five better
than sunblock 15.

Zack, you have to help me
get out of here.

Well, you'll have to speak
to the Dean of Students.

Here he comes now.

Surf's up, Zack.
Cowabunga, dudes!

Do the best you can and I'm sure
you'll end up at a good college.

I'm gonna ace that test
no matter what it takes.

Hey girls, great news.

The record company
loves your tape.

- All right!
- But--

they like three other
girl groups, too.

Buns on the Run,
Spiked Earlobes,

- and The Zit Hit Machine.
- The Zit Hit Machine?

Sounds like a break-out group.

What if they don't choose us?

Hey, don't worry. We're going to
make up their minds for them.

How?

You girls are gonna make
a music video.

Wait till they see how great
Hot Sundae looks.

- Who's Hot Sundae?
- You guys are.

- I like it.
- Great!

You guys, I don't know.
I have Dewey's midterm,

a big student council meeting,
and Honor Society all this week.

Oh, come on, Jessie.
You can't let everyone down.

- I don't know.
- We can't do it without you.

We need you, Jessie. Please?

Come on.

- Okay, I'm in.
- All right. Yeah!

- See ya, girls.
- (bell rings)

♪ One, two, three, bend ♪

♪ One, two, three, stretch ♪

♪ One, two, three, bend ♪

♪ One, two, three, stretch ♪

♪ Here's a message
that I'm sending to you ♪

♪ You can do what
you want to do ♪

♪ A little work
never hurt no one ♪

♪ It's the only way
you get things done ♪

♪ Put your mind to it,
go for it ♪

♪ Get down and break a sweat,
rock and roll ♪

♪ You ain't seen nothing yet ♪

♪ Mind to it, go for it,
get down and break a sweat ♪

♪ Rock and roll,
you ain't seen nothing yet ♪

♪ My love is strong
whenever you're around ♪

♪ I walk on air,
I barely touch the ground ♪

♪ And I'm so happy
that you're with me now ♪

♪ You'll never see me
in the lost and found ♪

♪ Put your mind to it, go for it,
get down and break a sweat ♪

♪ Rock and roll,
you ain't seen nothing yet ♪

♪ Mind to it, go for it,
get down and break a sweat ♪

♪ Rock and roll,
you ain't seen nothing yet ♪

♪ My love is there for you ♪

♪ The rest is up to you ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Oo-ooh, oo-ooh,
oo-ooh, oo-ooh ♪

♪ Na-na, na, na,
na, na-na, na ♪

♪ I feel so good
whenever you are near ♪

♪ You make my troubles
seem to disappear ♪

♪ You're the one that
I've been searching for ♪

♪ 'Cause everyday
I love you more and more ♪

♪ Put your mind to it, go for it,
get down and break a sweat ♪

♪ Rock and roll,
you ain't seen nothing yet ♪

♪ Mind to it, go for it,
get down and break a sweat ♪

♪ Rock and roll,
you ain't seen nothing yet ♪

♪ Get down and go for it! ♪

Jessie, the recording
company loves our video!

- They want to see us perform live.
- Yeah, it's all set.

The producer's coming to The Max
tomorrow night to see you guys.

- Hey, that's great.
- Yeah, we rehearse tonight.

I can't tonight. I have to study.
Tomorrow's the midterm.

Jessie, hey,
I'll sit next to you,

and you can copy off of me.

I may as well take poison now.

Come on.
It won't take that long.

And you're ready
for that test, Jess.

Okay.

I'll rehearse and then
I'll study afterwards.

(bell rings)

There's this quiz in English,
you got a pen I can borrow?

There's one in my book bag.
Help yourself.

What are these doing here?

I believe you were
looking for this.

- Jessie, those pills are dangerous.
- Yeah, well, so is geometry.

You told me you were
gonna stop taking them.

I need them to stay awake
and study, okay?

No, it's not okay.

I'm worried about you.
Give me the pills.

Mind your own business!

Great earrings. Ask me anything
about geometry, I'm ready!

- Jessie, are you all right?
- Great, wonderful, terrific!

Check this out, the square of
the hypotenuse of a right triangle

is equal to the sums of the square
of the other two sides, baby!

- Yeah!
- (bell rings)

Are you sure you don't
want to check this over?

No, Mr. Dewey, I aced it,
I know it. I really studied.

Did you get number six right?
Even I couldn't figure it out.

The square root of AB over two.

Thanks, Jessie.

(bell rings)

Hey, Preppie, you got a minute?

Yeah, make it quick. I gotta head
over to the Max for rehearsals.

My girls are singing tonight.

Come here, man.

Hey, look.
Jessie has a problem.

I think she's taking drugs.

Drugs?
What are you crazy?

She's been taking caffeine pills
to stay up all night cramming.

- I think she's hooked on them.
- Look, they're probably vitamins.

- Jessie's too smart to take drugs.
- Zack!

She's my friend, all right.
I'm not gonna listen to this.

I'm outta here.

♪ Look what you do to me ♪

♪ You got me burning up ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

- ♪ Hey, hey ♪
- (crowd cheers)

Ladies, ladies,
you guys are awesome.

Do that tonight,
and we're on our way.

Yeah!
Yeah!

All right, Screech, when
the producer gets here,

make sure he sits right
in front of the stage.

- Got it.
- All right!

- Lisa, you'll bring the costumes.
- I'll pick you up, okay?

Everyone, be here by 7:00.
Jessie, we'll come together.

Okay, hands in a circle for luck.

One, two, three, Hot Sundae!

We'll be great! We'll be awesome!
We'll knock 'em dead, right?

Right?
Yeah!

(knocking on door)

Zack: Jessie?

Jessie?

Hey, wake up.

Come on,
we've got to go to The Max.

Come on, Jessie.

- Come on.
- Zack?

What time is it?
I have to take my geometry test.

- You already took the test.
- I did?

Yeah. Yeah, it's 6:30.
Come on, we've gotta go.

- Where are we going?
- Where are we going?

You're singing tonight.

- Singing?
- Yeah.

- Tonight?
- Come on.

Wait, what am I gonna wear?

Jessie, remember?
Lisa's bringing your costume.

- Right. I gotta wash my hair.
- No there's no time.

No time.
There's never any time.

I don't have time to study.
I'll never get into Stanford.

I'll let everyone down.
I'm so confused.

Jessie, hey, just calm down.

- It's okay.
- You're right.

Everything will be okay.
I just need one of these.

Pills? You mean you
really are taking drugs?

- I need them.
- Jessie, give me those!

I need them, Zack.
I have to sing.

- You can't sing tonight.
- Yes, I can.

♪ I'm so excited
I'm so excited ♪

I'm so..

...scared.

Jessie, Jessie.

Jessie, don't be scared.

Listen, we'll get through this.

Hey, come on.

Remember that time when
we snuck out to see "E.T."?

And riding home on our bikes

it was so dark,
and we were scared.

Come on.

Ladies and gentlemen,
The Max presents...

Hot Sundae!

♪ Here's a message
that I'm sending to you ♪

♪ You can do what
you want to do ♪

♪ A little work
never hurt no one ♪

♪ It's the only way
to get things done ♪

♪ Put your mind to it, go for it,
get down and break a sweat ♪

♪ Rock and roll,
you ain't seen nothing yet ♪

♪ Mind to it, go for it,
get down and break a sweat ♪

♪ Rock and roll,
you ain't seen nothing yet ♪

Hi, how're you doing?
I am AC Slater.

Look, maybe you should
come back another time.

One of the girls
wasn't feeling well,

and it was hard to find
a replacement on short notice.

So we had to replace
her with that thing.

I'm sorry I let you guys down.

Forget that.

The important thing
is that you get better.

It's my own fault.
I'm always taking on too much.

Well, we didn't help.

Maybe we put too much
pressure on you to sing.

Kelly, you didn't
give me the pills.

I can't believe
I couldn't stop taking them.

- May I come in?
- Of course.

Here you go.

The flowers are beautiful.

I picked them from Zack's yard.

Just kidding.

I wasn't very nice to you.

You never are.

That's what I like about you.

- Will you forgive me?
- You got it, Mama.

(clears throat)

I owe you an apology, too.

I mean, don't let this
go to your head, Slater,

but you were right.
I should have listened to you.

Thanks, man.

I'm the one who didn't listen.

I've got a real problem.

My mom's taking me to the doctor
tomorrow for counseling.

I've got to learn that it's okay
if I'm not the best at everything.

Hey, I already learned that.

When?

Every time I get
a report card full of C's.

(instrumental theme music plays)