Saved by the Bell (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Clubs and Cliques - full transcript
- Shoot.
Know what I just remembered?
- What?
- We're killin' it
at Bayside!
- Hey!
- Hey!
- I'm class president,
you crushed
your football tryouts,
I got into Honors English.
[squeals]
- Oh, where you at, Romeo?
- Hey!
- Hey!
- And don't forget DeVante!
both: Doesn't care
if we live or die.
- Okay.
Here's the plan.
We get on track,
then I get this school
on track.
I even made a slogan
to promote integration.
"Two schools, one voice.
Bayside.
"Bays side by side."
- Oh, I love that!
"Bayside.
Side birch--"...
Wait, what was it--
both: Hey!
- Oh, hang on, hang on.
Are we getting presents?
- Yo, I've heard of this.
Like the richer you are,
the more free stuff you get.
- Morning, ladies.
Some of the Bayside moms have
put together these gifts
for the Douglas students.
The parents here love
to get very involved
no matter how much you beg them
to leave it alone.
Isn't that nice?!
- Good morning.
- Joyce...Whitelady?
- It's pronounced "whit-lity."
What's your name, girlfriend?
- Um, I'm Daisy Jimenez.
You might of heard of me,
I'm class president.
- [gasps] You are?
Aww, good for you!
[record scratch]
- Time out.
Now, I've met a lot of
Joyce Whiteladys in my life.
She has good intentions,
but she's gonna make me
feel like crap,
like by trying to bond with me
by saying something she heard
a Black guy say
on "Project Runway."
- Okay, here's the tea, sis.
That little snafu
with the school bus last week
was a real eye-opener
for some of us Bayside moms.
So we formed a committee to
better anticipate your needs.
It's called
"Parents Integrating
Teachers and Youth."
Take a tote.
- Look at this.
A toothbrush,
and a pregnancy test?
- "Ice-T's Guide
to Making Algebra Your Bitch."
- Oh, also!
There is a permission slip
in there.
But don't worry--if you don't
have someone at home,
you can just get the signature
of a cool uncle
or a neighbor smoking
out her window.
[school bell rings]
- * When I wake up
in the mornin' *
* Alarm gives out a warnin' *
* I don't think
I'll ever make it on time *
[school bell ringing]
* By the time I
grab my books *
* And I give myself a look *
* I'm at the corner
just in time *
* It's all right,
it's all right *
* Saved by the bell,
it's all right *
* It's all right,
saved by the bell *
* It's all right *
* 'Cause I'm saved
by the bell *
[school bell ringing]
- Hey, Lexi!
Happy Roster Day.
- Well, of course
you're in a good mood.
You know you're gonna
be the quarterback
of the football team.
- Yeah, but...
I'm worried I'm gonna get a
number that's hard to remember.
Like, um...
Oh, man.
What was it?
- I have a bad feeling
about the musical, Jamie.
What if I don't get the lead?
Or worse...
have to play the mom?
- Lexi, of course you're gonna
get the lead, okay?
You're like the greatest
actress in the world.
- Thank you.
[gasps]
I got it.
- You got it?
- Hey, when you make the team,
are you gonna play it cool?
Or are you gonna yell
"suck it"
like you did after you
murdered that door piñata
at Hector's birthday?
- I'ma keep it classy.
Yo, there's the list.
"List delayed
due to tough decision"?
What the dick?!
[scoffs]
You kidding me?
- [in background]
I'm so, so happy for me.
- Oh, my God!
You got the lead,
congratulations!
And congratulations to me,
of course.
You got the lead,
and so did I.
It's so not a competition.
I don't know why everyone keeps
saying that, it's just not!
Now, I will be your guide to
the world of Bayside theater.
Now, the hierarchy
of drama club is intense.
3 rules.
No, 12 rules.
Don't speak to people
in the chorus,
never wear a stupid French hat,
and what happens in the group
chat stays in the group chat.
Which is why
I already added you,
so you don't need
to worry about that.
I said you don't need to
worry about--you're already--
- He is so mysterious!
I have to find out who his
breathing instructor is.
- Don't breathe on me
like that.
- Hi.
Daisy.
They accidentally put me in
regular English last week,
but now I'm where I belong
in a class of fellow
high-achievers.
- Hey, buddy!
- [gasps]
Wait, you're
in Honors English?
- Duh, it's an honor
to teach me.
- Before we start,
I'm gonna collect your summer
reading assignments.
- Wait, summer reading?
No one told me
about summer reading!
- Mr. Morris, your report
on "Frankenstein"?
- Ms. Mandrake,
I wanted so bad
to read the book,
but I have this condition.
- Right.
Yeah, I did get a message
from a "Dr. Mario"?
Saying you have something
called "seasonal dyslexia"?
- It only flares up
during the summer.
I can't even read the lifeguard
signs at the beach.
It's really dangerous,
I keep drowning.
- Whatever, Mr. Morris.
I guess you're off the hook.
- Okay.
I didn't know we had
an assignment.
But if you could give me
a one-day extension,
I could read
the whole book tonight
and hand in my report first
thing tomorrow morning.
- What?
Don't be silly.
No one expects you to do that.
- Uh, I'm not asking for
special treatment.
I can do the work.
- Daisy, this is
Honors English.
I think you'll find it
plenty hard
without taking on
extra assignments.
[record scratch]
- Time out.
She obviously thinks
I can't do it,
but no need to freak out.
I'm cool!
- I just don't want you
to struggle to catch up.
You couldn't possibly--
- Don't tell me
what I'm possible of!
[kids gasp, murmur]
- Sure, why don't you do
the assignment?
Sounds great.
- [scoffs]
Dude, you are so dumb.
- Oh, and Mr. Morris?
If Daisy gets an extension,
that means you have time
to read the book, too.
- Noooo!
Wait, are you partnering us up?
- No.
-...Oooooooo!
- Have you not posted
the roster
because you have a problem
with a girl
being on the football team?
- Were you hiding in here
waiting to like
dramatically confront me?
'Cause it doesn't work
with these chairs.
You need one of those
tall chairs for that.
- Answer the question!
- [sighs]
Yeah, I guess I...
kinda have a problem with it.
- How many times do I have
to say this?
A woman can do everything
a man can do,
except enjoy the films
of Todd Phillips!
- It's not that I think Aisha
sucks, I don't!
I thinks she's great!
I'm just...
genuinely worried
she might get hurt.
Trying to protect her.
Come on, I'm being sexist
in a good way!
- Slater, it's not your job
to protect Aisha.
And if she's good enough
to be on the team,
then she should be!
Let the stats decide.
- Yeah, you're right.
Ooh, and I love me some stats.
You know, my QB rating
was 116 back in high school.
And I even kept stats
on all the girls I made out
with back in the day.
You wanna see?
- Ew.
- We've had...
Jennifer, Ginger,
that chick whose ex
was in the mob,
you remember her?
- Bye, Slater.
- That pi--what you mean?
It's getting good!
The princess
from Liechtenstein.
You!
You know, hearing it
out loud...
this might not be the best
thing for me
to be carrying around.
[phone notification beeping]
* *
* *
- [scoffs]
I mean, I've done that
accidentally
like a billion times.
Oh, shut up, Spencer.
- Oh, hey!
"Not buddy."
- [sighs]
Hey, Mac.
Look, I'm sorry you have to do
the assignment too.
It's just, I hate when people
have low expectations for me.
When someone thinks
I can't keep up,
it just makes me want
to prove them wrong.
- I don't get it.
You asked for homework.
- So you don't care that no one
ever expects anything from you?
- People expect plenty from me.
Cool schemes, dope playlists...
this walk.
[snapping fingers]
- Sweet walk, Mac!
- Mac, that teacher
didn't believe you were sick.
She just didn't expect you
to do the work.
No one does.
I heard in middle school,
instead of holding you back,
they made up a new grade
just for you.
- What?
[scoffs]
No, they didn't.
It was just the normal
"aiventh" grade
and it rocked.
- You really can't see how much
they lower the bar for you?
- Nobody is lowering the bar
for me, dude.
In fact, my dad said I
didn't even have to take it.
I can just be a lawyer
whenever I want.
- But don't you ever want
to accomplish anything?
I mean, you're smart enough
to pull off all these scams.
Why not actually try?
You know what?
Even if you wanted to,
I don't think you could.
- Don't tell me
what I'm good at!
- See?
Don't you want
to prove me wrong?
- I guess I got some things
to think about.
[snapping fingers]
- Cool sad walk, Mac!
* *
- Oh, my God.
I got quarterback!
Over Jamie?
Yes, I did it!
Suck it, losers!
I mean...
[chuckles]
thank you.
- You did the right thing.
- [chuckles]
- I'm proud of you.
- Ah, yeah, thanks.
Me too.
But of you?
Ha ha, totally.
Hey!
Is that...the gym...
that I need to teach?
I gotta go.
- Oh, no.
- I'm so sad.
- Honey?
Come here.
- Oh, it's just not fair.
- No.
- They discontinued Trix,
and the rabbit
never got to have any.
And now he never will!
Whoo, okay.
I'm good.
What's all this then?
Oh, my God.
I'm not quarterback?
On the same day
as the Trix thing.
- Hey, you look rough.
- I stayed up all night
working on my report,
but I'm almost done.
If I can convince my bio
teacher that I have diarrhea,
I can hide in the bathroom
all first period and finish.
- Did I hear "diarrhea"?
We can get you medicine if
you don't have insurance.
- I'm fine.
- Oh, please!
We really want to help!
We have typing classes,
prom dresses,
cans of corn?
Please!
- Have you seen Jamie
since the football roster
went up yesterday?
Are you nervous
he'll be pissed?
- Nah, this happened back
at Douglas.
They'll be annoyed
at first,
then they'll shove a bunch
of tampons in my locker,
and then they'll get over it.
We work it out on the field.
- Dude, it's messed up you're
not starting quarterback.
- See?
- And I don't like that it has
to come to this, but...
we know
what has to happen next.
You need to let us in.
Take the feelings helmet.
- The feeling I'm doing...
is sad.
And not a beautiful sad...
like the last day of summer.
[chuckles]
It's an ugly sad.
Like when my mom told me
I had to put down my dog.
Actually, no.
It's even worse than
putting down my dog,
because I got to pick her back
up again
after I finished my dinner.
[sobs]
- Come on, boys, he needs us!
- Come on.
We got you.
- You guys
are really good huggers.
- Maybe we'll work it out
on the field
after he stops crying.
- Very funny.
I give you a hard time
about feminism,
and you demote my son
to teach me a lesson?
Real mature.
- Man, I wish.
That would have been so cool.
Ha!
But no.
I was just doing
what you said.
Let the stats
speak for themselves.
'Course, Jamie's stats
don't really speak so much
as they drool and bang their
spoon for more oatmeal.
- Are you saying
that Jamie isn't good?
How could that
possibly be true?
- Have you ever been
to any of his games?
- Not exactly.
I'm afraid to see him
get a concussion.
- Have a seat.
Check this out.
- Now...set, hut!
- Did you fumble?
- No, I--
I don't know where I put it!
- Hike!
- Turn around!
- Hey, you suck!
- Any questions?
- I have a question.
I ate a piece of chalk,
and now I cannot see.
- Why did you even put him
on the team at all?
- I didn't!
Remember?
Jamie didn't make
the team last year.
But then you marched in here
and guilted me
into giving him a chance.
- Kind of like
I'm doing right now?
Well, someone has to tell him
he's not good.
- Yeah.
Someone does.
- Do you think it should be
like his pediatrician?
Or...my friend Cindy?
It's me.
I know it's me.
Or you?
- No, you!
- Hmm...Okay.
- Hey, buddy!
- Oh, my God.
Are you tired?
Did you stay up all night
doing your project, too?
- Yes?
- Okay.
I know we're both exhausted,
but doesn't it feel amazing?
Someone didn't think
we could do something,
but we did, Mac.
We did!
- So...yeah.
It's possible you and I
stayed up all night
doing different kinds
of projects.
- What does that mean?
- Stop everything!
Racial emergency.
- Excuse me?
- A very brave student,
who shall remain anonymous,
has brought to our attention
that this book contains
inappropriate themes
and must be banned.
"Frankenstein"
is obviously racist.
- What?!
How?
- A bunch of townspeople
get together with torches
and threaten a person of color.
- But he's green.
- We don't care
if he is white or Black
[whispers] or green.
We respect Frankenstein.
The real monster is prejudice.
- Okay, great.
Guess I won't be grading
anyone's summer reading.
- I busted my ass all night
on that report,
and you just threw it away!
- All night?
I'll have you know
that I spent weeks
learning about dyslexia
and how to pretend it.
And you threw that away!
I swear, if we weren't
best friends,
I would be really mad
at you right now.
Pfff.
Huh.
- [sighs]
- Listen up, you overgrown
Dulé Hill.
- Oh, good morning.
- Most people would kill to get
this much attention from me.
I'm entertaining as hell.
Anne Hathaway once said,
"I was a lot."
So I know you didn't leave
the group chat 'cause of me.
I think it's because of you.
- What's that supposed to mean?
- I think you're
a big-time tough guy
who's never been part
of a group before.
But you're a theater kid now.
And the people
in that group chat
are gonna stick by you
through thick and thin.
And I mean that metaphorically,
but also literally
when we gain or lose 20 pounds
for roles with
awards potential.
Stop shutting us out.
Let us let you in.
- You're right.
Yeah, I didn't have a lot
of friends at my old school.
- Yeah.
- I guess somewhere
along the way,
I decided it was safer
to put up walls instead.
But you...
you found a door
that I didn't even know
was there.
- I didn't find it.
I built it.
- Thank you, Lexi.
- Yeah.
Guys, DeVante
is in for the PJ party.
What the hell?!
DeVante!
Stop negging me or I'm
gonna fall in love with you.
- Hey, Mom.
You wanted to talk?
- Um...
Yes,
about the football team.
- Mom, um...
I'm really bummed
that they made me backup QB.
I mean, it would make sense if
Aisha was better than me.
But she's not!
I'm great at football!
Right?
- Jamie, I have
to be honest with you.
The truth is...
Well, the truth is...
the truth just...is.
And when you see it,
you're like,
"Wow...that's the truth."
You know?
- W--what are you trying
to say, Mom?
- Jamie, you are...
Amazing at football.
- [laughs]
Thank you, Mom!
I can't believe I spent all
this time doubting myself.
You know what?
I'm gonna go get my spot back.
Because Jamie Eleanor Spano
never gives up on his dreams.
both: [chuckling]
- Thanks, Mom.
Love you.
- Love you.
- Aisha!
I challenge you
to a football-off after school.
We'll prove who the better
football player is
once and for all.
- Isn't that what
the football tryout was for?
- [scoffs]
You wish.
That was a "try out."
This is a "try off."
- [scoffs]
Fine.
See you on the 50 yard line.
- No.
I have a better idea.
We'll do it
on the football field.
* *
Have a good one!
- [grunts]
- Aisha.
- Ugh!
- Aisha!
- Eh?
[mumbling]
- What?
Jamie challenged you
to a football-off
and now he's meeting you
on the field in 10 minutes?
Oof, that sucks.
- Uh, yeah.
For him.
I'm gonna win!
[scoffs]
You think I won't knock you
on your ass
because you have
a pretty mouth?
[punches]
Ugh!
- Do you really think
that's gonna change anything?
Or will he just make you do
another football-off
and another, and another,
until he gets what he wants?
They're never gonna let us
kill it here, are they?
- You don't know.
Maybe things can change.
- I tried to get
through to Mac,
and he didn't hear
a word I said.
It's like we're speaking
different languages.
- That's it!
- Oww.
- Sorry!
But you're right!
It's like different languages.
[sighs]
And maybe the only way
to get out of this
is trying to speak Jamie's.
- Well, I hope you have
better luck than me.
- Dude.
You're coming with me.
- Right, best friends.
Sorry.
[knocking]
- So?
How'd it go with telling Jamie
he's bad at football?
'Cause he's about to do
a football-off
in front of the whole school,
but...
I didn't know if that
was unrelated.
- Ugh, I'm a terrible mom.
Okay?
I protect Jamie
from everything!
I fix his homework,
I stand up to his bullies,
I tell him he's a great chef,
and now, every night,
I have to eat his world-famous
raw spaghetti with water sauce.
- Look, you love your son.
Can't beat yourself
up over that.
- It's just that
when you have a kid,
and you hold that gigantic baby
in your arms,
you swear that you'll never let
anything bad happen to them.
But now,
am I protecting Jamie?
Or am I protecting myself
from seeing him in pain?
- Well, if you want to let him
experience pain,
he's about to be
in a lot of it.
* *
- You got this, bro.
I believe in you.
* *
- You ready to do this?
- Yeah.
I'm also ready to do this!
[audience gasping]
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You brought a feelings helmet
to a football-off?
That's crazy.
- Look, I'm sharing
my feelings right now
which is something
I hate doing
because I have to put this in
terms that you can understand.
Yesterday should have been
the best day of my life.
I'm in a school
where I don't know anyone,
and I was made quarterback
of the football team.
And since then,
all that you've said
is that I don't deserve it.
Do you know how small
that makes me feel?
- Small as a...
baby ladybug?
- I'm better
at football than you.
Deep down,
you have to know that.
And if you're as good at
football as you say you are,
be good at this part.
Be my teammate, man.
- You're right.
You are better
at football than me.
I'm really sorry.
- It's okay.
You're better than me
at feelings.
- Hug?
[applause]
- Yes!
All right!
Weird little team I got.
I love 'em though.
[students whooping]
* *
[phone notification beep]
- Oh, no.
Randy just texted,
"Sorry, PJ party is cancelled.
"My step-dad just got indicted
"and he needs my bedroom
to hide.
Please pray for our family
during this difficult time."
Oh, great.
"So sorry, Randy.
"Prayer hands, prayer hands,
prayer hands."
[phone notification beep]
Ah!
Devante replied!
He's in the group chat!
[door slams]
And he's out of the group chat.
At least he read it.
- Bye, guys.
See you at practice.
- Not if I see you first!
Or eat more chalk.
- I'm glad you got through
to Jamie.
- Thanks.
Any luck with Mac?
- No, but if I really
wanna kill it at Bayside,
I can't be wasting my time
trying to fix a guy
who describes himself as
"Dennis the Menace" but sexy.
- Mm.
Well, if you ever wanna talk
about it,
I know a helmet.
This school is making me weird.
I'll see you later.
[record scratch]
- Time out.
"Frankenstein: A Report by
Mac Morris."
Whoa.
"Frankenstein
is a story of a man
"who creates a creature
in his own image.
My father and I--"
Oh, my God.
I mean, he bailed on it
mid-sentence
and he clearly needs a billion
dollars of therapy, but...
he actually listened to me.
If Mac Morris can change--
- What up, el stupido?
Not racist,
I call my mom that.
- Hey, that thing I was saying
the other day
about how nobody expects
anything from you?
I hate that feeling,
and I shouldn't have tried
to make you feel it too.
- Daisy, that means
a lot to me.
You know, that you want
a romantic relationship.
- Okay.
Nope.
Goodbye.
- I just think
we're better as friends!
I'm sorry you feel
the opposite.
* *
Know what I just remembered?
- What?
- We're killin' it
at Bayside!
- Hey!
- Hey!
- I'm class president,
you crushed
your football tryouts,
I got into Honors English.
[squeals]
- Oh, where you at, Romeo?
- Hey!
- Hey!
- And don't forget DeVante!
both: Doesn't care
if we live or die.
- Okay.
Here's the plan.
We get on track,
then I get this school
on track.
I even made a slogan
to promote integration.
"Two schools, one voice.
Bayside.
"Bays side by side."
- Oh, I love that!
"Bayside.
Side birch--"...
Wait, what was it--
both: Hey!
- Oh, hang on, hang on.
Are we getting presents?
- Yo, I've heard of this.
Like the richer you are,
the more free stuff you get.
- Morning, ladies.
Some of the Bayside moms have
put together these gifts
for the Douglas students.
The parents here love
to get very involved
no matter how much you beg them
to leave it alone.
Isn't that nice?!
- Good morning.
- Joyce...Whitelady?
- It's pronounced "whit-lity."
What's your name, girlfriend?
- Um, I'm Daisy Jimenez.
You might of heard of me,
I'm class president.
- [gasps] You are?
Aww, good for you!
[record scratch]
- Time out.
Now, I've met a lot of
Joyce Whiteladys in my life.
She has good intentions,
but she's gonna make me
feel like crap,
like by trying to bond with me
by saying something she heard
a Black guy say
on "Project Runway."
- Okay, here's the tea, sis.
That little snafu
with the school bus last week
was a real eye-opener
for some of us Bayside moms.
So we formed a committee to
better anticipate your needs.
It's called
"Parents Integrating
Teachers and Youth."
Take a tote.
- Look at this.
A toothbrush,
and a pregnancy test?
- "Ice-T's Guide
to Making Algebra Your Bitch."
- Oh, also!
There is a permission slip
in there.
But don't worry--if you don't
have someone at home,
you can just get the signature
of a cool uncle
or a neighbor smoking
out her window.
[school bell rings]
- * When I wake up
in the mornin' *
* Alarm gives out a warnin' *
* I don't think
I'll ever make it on time *
[school bell ringing]
* By the time I
grab my books *
* And I give myself a look *
* I'm at the corner
just in time *
* It's all right,
it's all right *
* Saved by the bell,
it's all right *
* It's all right,
saved by the bell *
* It's all right *
* 'Cause I'm saved
by the bell *
[school bell ringing]
- Hey, Lexi!
Happy Roster Day.
- Well, of course
you're in a good mood.
You know you're gonna
be the quarterback
of the football team.
- Yeah, but...
I'm worried I'm gonna get a
number that's hard to remember.
Like, um...
Oh, man.
What was it?
- I have a bad feeling
about the musical, Jamie.
What if I don't get the lead?
Or worse...
have to play the mom?
- Lexi, of course you're gonna
get the lead, okay?
You're like the greatest
actress in the world.
- Thank you.
[gasps]
I got it.
- You got it?
- Hey, when you make the team,
are you gonna play it cool?
Or are you gonna yell
"suck it"
like you did after you
murdered that door piñata
at Hector's birthday?
- I'ma keep it classy.
Yo, there's the list.
"List delayed
due to tough decision"?
What the dick?!
[scoffs]
You kidding me?
- [in background]
I'm so, so happy for me.
- Oh, my God!
You got the lead,
congratulations!
And congratulations to me,
of course.
You got the lead,
and so did I.
It's so not a competition.
I don't know why everyone keeps
saying that, it's just not!
Now, I will be your guide to
the world of Bayside theater.
Now, the hierarchy
of drama club is intense.
3 rules.
No, 12 rules.
Don't speak to people
in the chorus,
never wear a stupid French hat,
and what happens in the group
chat stays in the group chat.
Which is why
I already added you,
so you don't need
to worry about that.
I said you don't need to
worry about--you're already--
- He is so mysterious!
I have to find out who his
breathing instructor is.
- Don't breathe on me
like that.
- Hi.
Daisy.
They accidentally put me in
regular English last week,
but now I'm where I belong
in a class of fellow
high-achievers.
- Hey, buddy!
- [gasps]
Wait, you're
in Honors English?
- Duh, it's an honor
to teach me.
- Before we start,
I'm gonna collect your summer
reading assignments.
- Wait, summer reading?
No one told me
about summer reading!
- Mr. Morris, your report
on "Frankenstein"?
- Ms. Mandrake,
I wanted so bad
to read the book,
but I have this condition.
- Right.
Yeah, I did get a message
from a "Dr. Mario"?
Saying you have something
called "seasonal dyslexia"?
- It only flares up
during the summer.
I can't even read the lifeguard
signs at the beach.
It's really dangerous,
I keep drowning.
- Whatever, Mr. Morris.
I guess you're off the hook.
- Okay.
I didn't know we had
an assignment.
But if you could give me
a one-day extension,
I could read
the whole book tonight
and hand in my report first
thing tomorrow morning.
- What?
Don't be silly.
No one expects you to do that.
- Uh, I'm not asking for
special treatment.
I can do the work.
- Daisy, this is
Honors English.
I think you'll find it
plenty hard
without taking on
extra assignments.
[record scratch]
- Time out.
She obviously thinks
I can't do it,
but no need to freak out.
I'm cool!
- I just don't want you
to struggle to catch up.
You couldn't possibly--
- Don't tell me
what I'm possible of!
[kids gasp, murmur]
- Sure, why don't you do
the assignment?
Sounds great.
- [scoffs]
Dude, you are so dumb.
- Oh, and Mr. Morris?
If Daisy gets an extension,
that means you have time
to read the book, too.
- Noooo!
Wait, are you partnering us up?
- No.
-...Oooooooo!
- Have you not posted
the roster
because you have a problem
with a girl
being on the football team?
- Were you hiding in here
waiting to like
dramatically confront me?
'Cause it doesn't work
with these chairs.
You need one of those
tall chairs for that.
- Answer the question!
- [sighs]
Yeah, I guess I...
kinda have a problem with it.
- How many times do I have
to say this?
A woman can do everything
a man can do,
except enjoy the films
of Todd Phillips!
- It's not that I think Aisha
sucks, I don't!
I thinks she's great!
I'm just...
genuinely worried
she might get hurt.
Trying to protect her.
Come on, I'm being sexist
in a good way!
- Slater, it's not your job
to protect Aisha.
And if she's good enough
to be on the team,
then she should be!
Let the stats decide.
- Yeah, you're right.
Ooh, and I love me some stats.
You know, my QB rating
was 116 back in high school.
And I even kept stats
on all the girls I made out
with back in the day.
You wanna see?
- Ew.
- We've had...
Jennifer, Ginger,
that chick whose ex
was in the mob,
you remember her?
- Bye, Slater.
- That pi--what you mean?
It's getting good!
The princess
from Liechtenstein.
You!
You know, hearing it
out loud...
this might not be the best
thing for me
to be carrying around.
[phone notification beeping]
* *
* *
- [scoffs]
I mean, I've done that
accidentally
like a billion times.
Oh, shut up, Spencer.
- Oh, hey!
"Not buddy."
- [sighs]
Hey, Mac.
Look, I'm sorry you have to do
the assignment too.
It's just, I hate when people
have low expectations for me.
When someone thinks
I can't keep up,
it just makes me want
to prove them wrong.
- I don't get it.
You asked for homework.
- So you don't care that no one
ever expects anything from you?
- People expect plenty from me.
Cool schemes, dope playlists...
this walk.
[snapping fingers]
- Sweet walk, Mac!
- Mac, that teacher
didn't believe you were sick.
She just didn't expect you
to do the work.
No one does.
I heard in middle school,
instead of holding you back,
they made up a new grade
just for you.
- What?
[scoffs]
No, they didn't.
It was just the normal
"aiventh" grade
and it rocked.
- You really can't see how much
they lower the bar for you?
- Nobody is lowering the bar
for me, dude.
In fact, my dad said I
didn't even have to take it.
I can just be a lawyer
whenever I want.
- But don't you ever want
to accomplish anything?
I mean, you're smart enough
to pull off all these scams.
Why not actually try?
You know what?
Even if you wanted to,
I don't think you could.
- Don't tell me
what I'm good at!
- See?
Don't you want
to prove me wrong?
- I guess I got some things
to think about.
[snapping fingers]
- Cool sad walk, Mac!
* *
- Oh, my God.
I got quarterback!
Over Jamie?
Yes, I did it!
Suck it, losers!
I mean...
[chuckles]
thank you.
- You did the right thing.
- [chuckles]
- I'm proud of you.
- Ah, yeah, thanks.
Me too.
But of you?
Ha ha, totally.
Hey!
Is that...the gym...
that I need to teach?
I gotta go.
- Oh, no.
- I'm so sad.
- Honey?
Come here.
- Oh, it's just not fair.
- No.
- They discontinued Trix,
and the rabbit
never got to have any.
And now he never will!
Whoo, okay.
I'm good.
What's all this then?
Oh, my God.
I'm not quarterback?
On the same day
as the Trix thing.
- Hey, you look rough.
- I stayed up all night
working on my report,
but I'm almost done.
If I can convince my bio
teacher that I have diarrhea,
I can hide in the bathroom
all first period and finish.
- Did I hear "diarrhea"?
We can get you medicine if
you don't have insurance.
- I'm fine.
- Oh, please!
We really want to help!
We have typing classes,
prom dresses,
cans of corn?
Please!
- Have you seen Jamie
since the football roster
went up yesterday?
Are you nervous
he'll be pissed?
- Nah, this happened back
at Douglas.
They'll be annoyed
at first,
then they'll shove a bunch
of tampons in my locker,
and then they'll get over it.
We work it out on the field.
- Dude, it's messed up you're
not starting quarterback.
- See?
- And I don't like that it has
to come to this, but...
we know
what has to happen next.
You need to let us in.
Take the feelings helmet.
- The feeling I'm doing...
is sad.
And not a beautiful sad...
like the last day of summer.
[chuckles]
It's an ugly sad.
Like when my mom told me
I had to put down my dog.
Actually, no.
It's even worse than
putting down my dog,
because I got to pick her back
up again
after I finished my dinner.
[sobs]
- Come on, boys, he needs us!
- Come on.
We got you.
- You guys
are really good huggers.
- Maybe we'll work it out
on the field
after he stops crying.
- Very funny.
I give you a hard time
about feminism,
and you demote my son
to teach me a lesson?
Real mature.
- Man, I wish.
That would have been so cool.
Ha!
But no.
I was just doing
what you said.
Let the stats
speak for themselves.
'Course, Jamie's stats
don't really speak so much
as they drool and bang their
spoon for more oatmeal.
- Are you saying
that Jamie isn't good?
How could that
possibly be true?
- Have you ever been
to any of his games?
- Not exactly.
I'm afraid to see him
get a concussion.
- Have a seat.
Check this out.
- Now...set, hut!
- Did you fumble?
- No, I--
I don't know where I put it!
- Hike!
- Turn around!
- Hey, you suck!
- Any questions?
- I have a question.
I ate a piece of chalk,
and now I cannot see.
- Why did you even put him
on the team at all?
- I didn't!
Remember?
Jamie didn't make
the team last year.
But then you marched in here
and guilted me
into giving him a chance.
- Kind of like
I'm doing right now?
Well, someone has to tell him
he's not good.
- Yeah.
Someone does.
- Do you think it should be
like his pediatrician?
Or...my friend Cindy?
It's me.
I know it's me.
Or you?
- No, you!
- Hmm...Okay.
- Hey, buddy!
- Oh, my God.
Are you tired?
Did you stay up all night
doing your project, too?
- Yes?
- Okay.
I know we're both exhausted,
but doesn't it feel amazing?
Someone didn't think
we could do something,
but we did, Mac.
We did!
- So...yeah.
It's possible you and I
stayed up all night
doing different kinds
of projects.
- What does that mean?
- Stop everything!
Racial emergency.
- Excuse me?
- A very brave student,
who shall remain anonymous,
has brought to our attention
that this book contains
inappropriate themes
and must be banned.
"Frankenstein"
is obviously racist.
- What?!
How?
- A bunch of townspeople
get together with torches
and threaten a person of color.
- But he's green.
- We don't care
if he is white or Black
[whispers] or green.
We respect Frankenstein.
The real monster is prejudice.
- Okay, great.
Guess I won't be grading
anyone's summer reading.
- I busted my ass all night
on that report,
and you just threw it away!
- All night?
I'll have you know
that I spent weeks
learning about dyslexia
and how to pretend it.
And you threw that away!
I swear, if we weren't
best friends,
I would be really mad
at you right now.
Pfff.
Huh.
- [sighs]
- Listen up, you overgrown
Dulé Hill.
- Oh, good morning.
- Most people would kill to get
this much attention from me.
I'm entertaining as hell.
Anne Hathaway once said,
"I was a lot."
So I know you didn't leave
the group chat 'cause of me.
I think it's because of you.
- What's that supposed to mean?
- I think you're
a big-time tough guy
who's never been part
of a group before.
But you're a theater kid now.
And the people
in that group chat
are gonna stick by you
through thick and thin.
And I mean that metaphorically,
but also literally
when we gain or lose 20 pounds
for roles with
awards potential.
Stop shutting us out.
Let us let you in.
- You're right.
Yeah, I didn't have a lot
of friends at my old school.
- Yeah.
- I guess somewhere
along the way,
I decided it was safer
to put up walls instead.
But you...
you found a door
that I didn't even know
was there.
- I didn't find it.
I built it.
- Thank you, Lexi.
- Yeah.
Guys, DeVante
is in for the PJ party.
What the hell?!
DeVante!
Stop negging me or I'm
gonna fall in love with you.
- Hey, Mom.
You wanted to talk?
- Um...
Yes,
about the football team.
- Mom, um...
I'm really bummed
that they made me backup QB.
I mean, it would make sense if
Aisha was better than me.
But she's not!
I'm great at football!
Right?
- Jamie, I have
to be honest with you.
The truth is...
Well, the truth is...
the truth just...is.
And when you see it,
you're like,
"Wow...that's the truth."
You know?
- W--what are you trying
to say, Mom?
- Jamie, you are...
Amazing at football.
- [laughs]
Thank you, Mom!
I can't believe I spent all
this time doubting myself.
You know what?
I'm gonna go get my spot back.
Because Jamie Eleanor Spano
never gives up on his dreams.
both: [chuckling]
- Thanks, Mom.
Love you.
- Love you.
- Aisha!
I challenge you
to a football-off after school.
We'll prove who the better
football player is
once and for all.
- Isn't that what
the football tryout was for?
- [scoffs]
You wish.
That was a "try out."
This is a "try off."
- [scoffs]
Fine.
See you on the 50 yard line.
- No.
I have a better idea.
We'll do it
on the football field.
* *
Have a good one!
- [grunts]
- Aisha.
- Ugh!
- Aisha!
- Eh?
[mumbling]
- What?
Jamie challenged you
to a football-off
and now he's meeting you
on the field in 10 minutes?
Oof, that sucks.
- Uh, yeah.
For him.
I'm gonna win!
[scoffs]
You think I won't knock you
on your ass
because you have
a pretty mouth?
[punches]
Ugh!
- Do you really think
that's gonna change anything?
Or will he just make you do
another football-off
and another, and another,
until he gets what he wants?
They're never gonna let us
kill it here, are they?
- You don't know.
Maybe things can change.
- I tried to get
through to Mac,
and he didn't hear
a word I said.
It's like we're speaking
different languages.
- That's it!
- Oww.
- Sorry!
But you're right!
It's like different languages.
[sighs]
And maybe the only way
to get out of this
is trying to speak Jamie's.
- Well, I hope you have
better luck than me.
- Dude.
You're coming with me.
- Right, best friends.
Sorry.
[knocking]
- So?
How'd it go with telling Jamie
he's bad at football?
'Cause he's about to do
a football-off
in front of the whole school,
but...
I didn't know if that
was unrelated.
- Ugh, I'm a terrible mom.
Okay?
I protect Jamie
from everything!
I fix his homework,
I stand up to his bullies,
I tell him he's a great chef,
and now, every night,
I have to eat his world-famous
raw spaghetti with water sauce.
- Look, you love your son.
Can't beat yourself
up over that.
- It's just that
when you have a kid,
and you hold that gigantic baby
in your arms,
you swear that you'll never let
anything bad happen to them.
But now,
am I protecting Jamie?
Or am I protecting myself
from seeing him in pain?
- Well, if you want to let him
experience pain,
he's about to be
in a lot of it.
* *
- You got this, bro.
I believe in you.
* *
- You ready to do this?
- Yeah.
I'm also ready to do this!
[audience gasping]
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You brought a feelings helmet
to a football-off?
That's crazy.
- Look, I'm sharing
my feelings right now
which is something
I hate doing
because I have to put this in
terms that you can understand.
Yesterday should have been
the best day of my life.
I'm in a school
where I don't know anyone,
and I was made quarterback
of the football team.
And since then,
all that you've said
is that I don't deserve it.
Do you know how small
that makes me feel?
- Small as a...
baby ladybug?
- I'm better
at football than you.
Deep down,
you have to know that.
And if you're as good at
football as you say you are,
be good at this part.
Be my teammate, man.
- You're right.
You are better
at football than me.
I'm really sorry.
- It's okay.
You're better than me
at feelings.
- Hug?
[applause]
- Yes!
All right!
Weird little team I got.
I love 'em though.
[students whooping]
* *
[phone notification beep]
- Oh, no.
Randy just texted,
"Sorry, PJ party is cancelled.
"My step-dad just got indicted
"and he needs my bedroom
to hide.
Please pray for our family
during this difficult time."
Oh, great.
"So sorry, Randy.
"Prayer hands, prayer hands,
prayer hands."
[phone notification beep]
Ah!
Devante replied!
He's in the group chat!
[door slams]
And he's out of the group chat.
At least he read it.
- Bye, guys.
See you at practice.
- Not if I see you first!
Or eat more chalk.
- I'm glad you got through
to Jamie.
- Thanks.
Any luck with Mac?
- No, but if I really
wanna kill it at Bayside,
I can't be wasting my time
trying to fix a guy
who describes himself as
"Dennis the Menace" but sexy.
- Mm.
Well, if you ever wanna talk
about it,
I know a helmet.
This school is making me weird.
I'll see you later.
[record scratch]
- Time out.
"Frankenstein: A Report by
Mac Morris."
Whoa.
"Frankenstein
is a story of a man
"who creates a creature
in his own image.
My father and I--"
Oh, my God.
I mean, he bailed on it
mid-sentence
and he clearly needs a billion
dollars of therapy, but...
he actually listened to me.
If Mac Morris can change--
- What up, el stupido?
Not racist,
I call my mom that.
- Hey, that thing I was saying
the other day
about how nobody expects
anything from you?
I hate that feeling,
and I shouldn't have tried
to make you feel it too.
- Daisy, that means
a lot to me.
You know, that you want
a romantic relationship.
- Okay.
Nope.
Goodbye.
- I just think
we're better as friends!
I'm sorry you feel
the opposite.
* *