Saturday Night Live (1975–…): Season 43, Episode 5 - Tiffany Haddish/Taylor Swift - full transcript
Mr. Vice President Alabama Senet Candidate Roy More Is Here
Great Send Him In
(Audience Cheering)
How You Doin' Mike? Roy
I don't have to tell you that the senet hangs in the balance which
tax reform plan this year to bring Mr. Trump
I don't have to tell you that the senet hangs in the balance which
tax reform plan this year to bring Mr. Trump
list of big legislative accomplishments to one. We cant
lose your seat this December.
Yes Sir. Now I know you'r bens guy but this latest news about you is concerning
voters in Alabama will never lets someone whose relations with minor.
list of big legislative accomplishments to one. We cant
lose your seat this December.
Yes Sir. Now I know you'r bens guy but this latest news about you is concerning
voters in Alabama will never lets someone whose relations with minor.
You sure about that? No. Alabama is quite a place but we can't
take chances.
Mike look it's all lies. I'm not that guy. Perhaps Roy perhaps but it's hard to convince people
that you not into Young Girls when you just like woody from Toy Story.
Come on, the left wing media loves to repeats this Sexual Harrasments stories
There'ns new one everyday, Mike. I know even i heard out Louis Seke and I'm not allowed to watch
T.V. I'm only allowed to listen to it with this girl who accused you is only 14 Years old, Roy.
You gotta do the right thing here.
All right. If everyones thinks i did it I'll Marry her. No, Roy (haha)
I want you to consider stepping aside.
Don't think of it is ending your campaign think of it is going to conversion therapy to turn yourself
into someone who's no longer a candidate.
Come on, Sir. Do we have to do it this way. I mean can't you just call the boss.
I sorry I'm not gonna call Vladimir Putin about this now
I can't make you do anything. Roy, but I want you to think hard about this.
I'll give you a couple minutes consider.
Ahh Damn! What a pickle this is? What am i gonna do.
(Audience Cheering)
You're gonna drop back that's what you gonna do. It's session what you're
doing in here. I'm just doing what i always do
cooking up night meals to chill but it's good i'm here 'cause I've been meaning to
talk to you.
All Right. Roy, You've been doing some controversial stuff way begunara all stage
tell folks Muslim shouldn't be allowed in Congress and 9\11 was God's Punishment for Slave .I Love it. You check a lot of boxes for me,Roy.
Thank Yo
Wooooo. Ah This is an amazing night. I'm so Happy
to be here. You may know me from Movie
called "Girl Strip" it came out this past Summer. Star Quen Latifah, Jada Pinket Smith,
Regina Hall and me, Tiffany Haddish. Ahhhh
Now this movie made history it made Hundred Million Dollars plus okay and
I have tryna' figure out where
Great Send Him In
(Audience Cheering)
How You Doin' Mike? Roy
I don't have to tell you that the senet hangs in the balance which
tax reform plan this year to bring Mr. Trump
I don't have to tell you that the senet hangs in the balance which
tax reform plan this year to bring Mr. Trump
list of big legislative accomplishments to one. We cant
lose your seat this December.
Yes Sir. Now I know you'r bens guy but this latest news about you is concerning
voters in Alabama will never lets someone whose relations with minor.
list of big legislative accomplishments to one. We cant
lose your seat this December.
Yes Sir. Now I know you'r bens guy but this latest news about you is concerning
voters in Alabama will never lets someone whose relations with minor.
You sure about that? No. Alabama is quite a place but we can't
take chances.
Mike look it's all lies. I'm not that guy. Perhaps Roy perhaps but it's hard to convince people
that you not into Young Girls when you just like woody from Toy Story.
Come on, the left wing media loves to repeats this Sexual Harrasments stories
There'ns new one everyday, Mike. I know even i heard out Louis Seke and I'm not allowed to watch
T.V. I'm only allowed to listen to it with this girl who accused you is only 14 Years old, Roy.
You gotta do the right thing here.
All right. If everyones thinks i did it I'll Marry her. No, Roy (haha)
I want you to consider stepping aside.
Don't think of it is ending your campaign think of it is going to conversion therapy to turn yourself
into someone who's no longer a candidate.
Come on, Sir. Do we have to do it this way. I mean can't you just call the boss.
I sorry I'm not gonna call Vladimir Putin about this now
I can't make you do anything. Roy, but I want you to think hard about this.
I'll give you a couple minutes consider.
Ahh Damn! What a pickle this is? What am i gonna do.
(Audience Cheering)
You're gonna drop back that's what you gonna do. It's session what you're
doing in here. I'm just doing what i always do
cooking up night meals to chill but it's good i'm here 'cause I've been meaning to
talk to you.
All Right. Roy, You've been doing some controversial stuff way begunara all stage
tell folks Muslim shouldn't be allowed in Congress and 9\11 was God's Punishment for Slave .I Love it. You check a lot of boxes for me,Roy.
Thank Yo
Wooooo. Ah This is an amazing night. I'm so Happy
to be here. You may know me from Movie
called "Girl Strip" it came out this past Summer. Star Quen Latifah, Jada Pinket Smith,
Regina Hall and me, Tiffany Haddish. Ahhhh
Now this movie made history it made Hundred Million Dollars plus okay and
I have tryna' figure out where