Saturday Night Live (1975–…): Season 40, Episode 16 - Dwayne Johnson/George Ezra - full transcript

>>> GENTLEMEN, THANK YOU FOR
COMING.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

COMING.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> NOW, THE REASON I ASKED YOU

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> NOW, THE REASON I ASKED YOU
ALL HERE IS BECAUSE WE ONLY HAVE

>> NOW, THE REASON I ASKED YOU
ALL HERE IS BECAUSE WE ONLY HAVE
UNTIL THE END OF MARCH TO GET

ALL HERE IS BECAUSE WE ONLY HAVE
UNTIL THE END OF MARCH TO GET
SOMETHING DONE IN THE MIDDLE

UNTIL THE END OF MARCH TO GET
SOMETHING DONE IN THE MIDDLE
EAST.

SOMETHING DONE IN THE MIDDLE
EAST.
THAT'S HARD TO DO WHEN YOU,

EAST.
THAT'S HARD TO DO WHEN YOU,
SENATOR COTTON ARE SENDING

THAT'S HARD TO DO WHEN YOU,
SENATOR COTTON ARE SENDING
LETTERS TO THE IRANIAN

SENATOR COTTON ARE SENDING
LETTERS TO THE IRANIAN
GOVERNMENT BEHIND MY BACK.

LETTERS TO THE IRANIAN
GOVERNMENT BEHIND MY BACK.
>> YES, I DID.



GOVERNMENT BEHIND MY BACK.
>> YES, I DID.
>> ALL RIGHT.

>> YES, I DID.
>> ALL RIGHT.
>> OR WHEN YOU, SPEAKER BOEHNER

>> ALL RIGHT.
>> OR WHEN YOU, SPEAKER BOEHNER
ARE INVITING THE PRIME MINISTER

>> OR WHEN YOU, SPEAKER BOEHNER
ARE INVITING THE PRIME MINISTER
OF ISRAEL TO SPEAK TO CONGRESS

ARE INVITING THE PRIME MINISTER
OF ISRAEL TO SPEAK TO CONGRESS
WITHOUT CONSULTING WITH ME?

OF ISRAEL TO SPEAK TO CONGRESS
WITHOUT CONSULTING WITH ME?
>> HAD TO DO IT.

WITHOUT CONSULTING WITH ME?
>> HAD TO DO IT.
>> OR WHEN YOU, SENATOR CRUZ

>> HAD TO DO IT.
>> OR WHEN YOU, SENATOR CRUZ
CALL MR. NETANYAHU AN

>> OR WHEN YOU, SENATOR CRUZ
CALL MR. NETANYAHU AN
EXTRAORDINARY LEADER AND SIDE

CALL MR. NETANYAHU AN
EXTRAORDINARY LEADER AND SIDE
WITH HIM AGAINST YOUR OWN

EXTRAORDINARY LEADER AND SIDE
WITH HIM AGAINST YOUR OWN
PRESIDENT?

WITH HIM AGAINST YOUR OWN
PRESIDENT?
>> THAT'S JUST HOW I FEEL.

PRESIDENT?
>> THAT'S JUST HOW I FEEL.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]

>> THAT'S JUST HOW I FEEL.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
>> NOW, LOOK.



[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
>> NOW, LOOK.
I'M GOING TO TRY TO NOT LOSE MY

>> NOW, LOOK.
I'M GOING TO TRY TO NOT LOSE MY
TEMPER, BUT WHAT'S IT GOING TO

I'M GOING TO TRY TO NOT LOSE MY
TEMPER, BUT WHAT'S IT GOING TO
TAKE FOR US TO SHOW A UNITED

TEMPER, BUT WHAT'S IT GOING TO
TAKE FOR US TO SHOW A UNITED
FRONT ON THIS?

TAKE FOR US TO SHOW A UNITED
FRONT ON THIS?
>> WELL, NOT TO BE RUDE, MR.

FRONT ON THIS?
>> WELL, NOT TO BE RUDE, MR.
PRESIDENT.

>> WELL, NOT TO BE RUDE, MR.
PRESIDENT.
THE ONLY REASON I INVITED PRIME

PRESIDENT.
THE ONLY REASON I INVITED PRIME
MINISTER NETANYAHU IS BECAUSE I

THE ONLY REASON I INVITED PRIME
MINISTER NETANYAHU IS BECAUSE I
WANTED TO MEET A WORLD LEADER

MINISTER NETANYAHU IS BECAUSE I
WANTED TO MEET A WORLD LEADER
WHOSE PEOPLE ACTUALLY RESPECT

WANTED TO MEET A WORLD LEADER
WHOSE PEOPLE ACTUALLY RESPECT
HIM.

WHOSE PEOPLE ACTUALLY RESPECT
HIM.
>> YEAH, YOU KNOW.

HIM.
>> YEAH, YOU KNOW.
AND I'M IMPRESSED YOU EVEN CAME

>> YEAH, YOU KNOW.
AND I'M IMPRESSED YOU EVEN CAME
TO VISIT, CONSIDERING HOW MUCH

AND I'M IMPRESSED YOU EVEN CAME
TO VISIT, CONSIDERING HOW MUCH
YOU BOTCHED THE SITUATION IN THE

TO VISIT, CONSIDERING HOW MUCH
YOU BOTCHED THE SITUATION IN THE
MIDDLE EAST.

YOU BOTCHED THE SITUATION IN THE
MIDDLE EAST.
[ LAUGHTER ]

MIDDLE EAST.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I THINK I UNDERSTAND FOREIGN

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I THINK I UNDERSTAND FOREIGN
POLICY BETTER THAN YOU.

>> I THINK I UNDERSTAND FOREIGN
POLICY BETTER THAN YOU.
AND UNRELATED, I HEARD YOUR

POLICY BETTER THAN YOU.
AND UNRELATED, I HEARD YOUR
FINAL FOUR BRACKET IS TOTALLY

AND UNRELATED, I HEARD YOUR
FINAL FOUR BRACKET IS TOTALLY
BUSTED.

FINAL FOUR BRACKET IS TOTALLY
BUSTED.
>> OH, MY GOD, IT'S HAPPENING.

BUSTED.
>> OH, MY GOD, IT'S HAPPENING.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> OH, MY GOD, IT'S HAPPENING.
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ SCREAMING ]

[ LAUGHTER ]
[ SCREAMING ]
>> WHAT'S HAPPENING?

[ SCREAMING ]
>> WHAT'S HAPPENING?
>> WHAT'S HAPPENING IS, YOU MADE

>> WHAT'S HAPPENING?
>> WHAT'S HAPPENING IS, YOU MADE
BARACK OBAMA VERY ANGRY.

>> WHAT'S HAPPENING IS, YOU MADE
BARACK OBAMA VERY ANGRY.
AND WHEN YOU MAKE HIM ANGRY, HE

BARACK OBAMA VERY ANGRY.
AND WHEN YOU MAKE HIM ANGRY, HE
TURNS INTO "THE ROCK" OBAMA.

AND WHEN YOU MAKE HIM ANGRY, HE
TURNS INTO "THE ROCK" OBAMA.
WELL, ANYWAY, I WANTED TO REMIND

TURNS INTO "THE ROCK" OBAMA.
WELL, ANYWAY, I WANTED TO REMIND
YOU ABOUT DINNER, BARACK.

WELL, ANYWAY, I WANTED TO REMIND
YOU ABOUT DINNER, BARACK.
GENTLEMEN, GOOD LUCK.

YOU ABOUT DINNER, BARACK.
GENTLEMEN, GOOD LUCK.
>> NOW, DON'T BE ALARMED, "THE

GENTLEMEN, GOOD LUCK.
>> NOW, DON'T BE ALARMED, "THE
ROCK" OBAMA MUCH LIKE BARACK

>> NOW, DON'T BE ALARMED, "THE
ROCK" OBAMA MUCH LIKE BARACK
OBAMA ONLY LARGER AND MORE

ROCK" OBAMA MUCH LIKE BARACK
OBAMA ONLY LARGER AND MORE
VIOLENT.

OBAMA ONLY LARGER AND MORE
VIOLENT.
NOW, WHERE WERE WE?

VIOLENT.
NOW, WHERE WERE WE?
YOU, ORANGE MAN.

NOW, WHERE WERE WE?
YOU, ORANGE MAN.
>> ME?

YOU, ORANGE MAN.
>> ME?
>> YOU INVITE NETANYAHU WITHOUT

>> ME?
>> YOU INVITE NETANYAHU WITHOUT
ASKING?

>> YOU INVITE NETANYAHU WITHOUT
ASKING?
>> I DID, BUT -- YOU LIKE

ASKING?
>> I DID, BUT -- YOU LIKE
ISRAEL?

>> I DID, BUT -- YOU LIKE
ISRAEL?
>>Y.

ISRAEL?
>>Y.
>> MAYBE YOU SHOULD GO VISIT

>>Y.
>> MAYBE YOU SHOULD GO VISIT
ISRAEL.

>> MAYBE YOU SHOULD GO VISIT
ISRAEL.
>> YOU, TOM COTTON, COME HERE.

ISRAEL.
>> YOU, TOM COTTON, COME HERE.
>> OKAY.

>> YOU, TOM COTTON, COME HERE.
>> OKAY.
YOU WRITE LETTER TO IRAN?

>> OKAY.
YOU WRITE LETTER TO IRAN?
>> I DID, YES.

YOU WRITE LETTER TO IRAN?
>> I DID, YES.
YEAH.

>> I DID, YES.
YEAH.
>> YOU LIKE WRITING LETTERS?

YEAH.
>> YOU LIKE WRITING LETTERS?
>> I GUESS.

>> YOU LIKE WRITING LETTERS?
>> I GUESS.
>> HOW YOU WRITE LETTER WHEN YOU

>> I GUESS.
>> HOW YOU WRITE LETTER WHEN YOU
HAVE NO HAND?

>> HOW YOU WRITE LETTER WHEN YOU
HAVE NO HAND?
>> WATCH THIS, OBAMA FROM

HAVE NO HAND?
>> WATCH THIS, OBAMA FROM
DOWNTOWN.

>> WATCH THIS, OBAMA FROM
DOWNTOWN.
OKAY, YOU GO NOW.

DOWNTOWN.
OKAY, YOU GO NOW.
[ LAUGHTER ]

OKAY, YOU GO NOW.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YOU, TED CRUZ.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YOU, TED CRUZ.
>> ALL RIGHT.

>> YOU, TED CRUZ.
>> ALL RIGHT.
>> COME SIT NEXT TO PRESIDENT.

>> ALL RIGHT.
>> COME SIT NEXT TO PRESIDENT.
>> YES?

>> COME SIT NEXT TO PRESIDENT.
>> YES?
>> YOU SHUT DOWN GOVERNMENT?

>> YES?
>> YOU SHUT DOWN GOVERNMENT?
VERY RUDE.

>> YOU SHUT DOWN GOVERNMENT?
VERY RUDE.
"THE ROCK" OBAMA POLITE.

VERY RUDE.
"THE ROCK" OBAMA POLITE.
I ASK, PLEASE, MAY I CRUSH YOUR

"THE ROCK" OBAMA POLITE.
I ASK, PLEASE, MAY I CRUSH YOUR
HEAD?

I ASK, PLEASE, MAY I CRUSH YOUR
HEAD?
>> OH, NO.

HEAD?
>> OH, NO.
>> NO, BARACK, STOP.

>> OH, NO.
>> NO, BARACK, STOP.
>> JUST KIDDING.

>> NO, BARACK, STOP.
>> JUST KIDDING.
ME NO CRUSH HIS HEAD, JUST TEAR

>> JUST KIDDING.
ME NO CRUSH HIS HEAD, JUST TEAR
IT OFF.

ME NO CRUSH HIS HEAD, JUST TEAR
IT OFF.
>> SENATOR, YOU BETTER GO.

IT OFF.
>> SENATOR, YOU BETTER GO.
>> OKAY, BYE-BYE.

>> SENATOR, YOU BETTER GO.
>> OKAY, BYE-BYE.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> OKAY, BYE-BYE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> EXCUSE ME, MR. PRESIDENT.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> EXCUSE ME, MR. PRESIDENT.
>> YES, AGENT?

>> EXCUSE ME, MR. PRESIDENT.
>> YES, AGENT?
>> I'M AFRAID WE HAD ANOTHER

>> YES, AGENT?
>> I'M AFRAID WE HAD ANOTHER
LITTLE OOPSIE-DO.

>> I'M AFRAID WE HAD ANOTHER
LITTLE OOPSIE-DO.
THERE'S BEEN A VAGUE RANT LIVING

LITTLE OOPSIE-DO.
THERE'S BEEN A VAGUE RANT LIVING
IN THE WHITE HOUSE GARDEN FOR

THERE'S BEEN A VAGUE RANT LIVING
IN THE WHITE HOUSE GARDEN FOR
TWO MONTHS.

IN THE WHITE HOUSE GARDEN FOR
TWO MONTHS.
>> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

TWO MONTHS.
>> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
MY GARDEN?

>> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
MY GARDEN?
>> EASY, MICHELLE.

MY GARDEN?
>> EASY, MICHELLE.
[ SCREAMING ]

>> EASY, MICHELLE.
[ SCREAMING ]
>> BARACK NOT ONLY ONE, THERE'S

[ SCREAMING ]
>> BARACK NOT ONLY ONE, THERE'S
ALSO SHE ROCK OBAMA.

>> BARACK NOT ONLY ONE, THERE'S
ALSO SHE ROCK OBAMA.
>> YOU TRIED TO PROTECT US?

ALSO SHE ROCK OBAMA.
>> YOU TRIED TO PROTECT US?
BUT WHO WILL PROTECT YOU?

>> YOU TRIED TO PROTECT US?
BUT WHO WILL PROTECT YOU?
>> MICHELLE, HIGH FIVE.

BUT WHO WILL PROTECT YOU?
>> MICHELLE, HIGH FIVE.
BEING PRESIDENT IS FUN.

>> MICHELLE, HIGH FIVE.
BEING PRESIDENT IS FUN.
AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S

BEING PRESIDENT IS FUN.
AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
"SATURDAY NIGHT"!

AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
"SATURDAY NIGHT"!
♪

"SATURDAY NIGHT"!
♪
>> Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY

♪
>> Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY
NIGHT LIVE" -- WITH VANESSA

>> Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY
NIGHT LIVE" -- WITH VANESSA
BAYER.

NIGHT LIVE" -- WITH VANESSA
BAYER.
AIDY BRYANT.

BAYER.
AIDY BRYANT.
TARAN KILLAM.

AIDY BRYANT.
TARAN KILLAM.
KATE McKINNON.

TARAN KILLAM.
KATE McKINNON.
BOBBY MOYNIHAN.

KATE McKINNON.
BOBBY MOYNIHAN.
JAY PHARAOH.

BOBBY MOYNIHAN.
JAY PHARAOH.
CECILY STRONG.

JAY PHARAOH.
CECILY STRONG.
KEENAN THOMPSON.

CECILY STRONG.
KEENAN THOMPSON.
FEATURING BECK BENNETT.

KEENAN THOMPSON.
FEATURING BECK BENNETT.
MICHAEL CHE.

FEATURING BECK BENNETT.
MICHAEL CHE.
PETE DAVIDSON.

MICHAEL CHE.
PETE DAVIDSON.
LESLIE JONES.

PETE DAVIDSON.
LESLIE JONES.
COLIN JOST.

LESLIE JONES.
COLIN JOST.
KYLE MOONEY.

COLIN JOST.
KYLE MOONEY.
SASHEER ZAMETA.

KYLE MOONEY.
SASHEER ZAMETA.
AND YOUR HOST, DWAYNE JOHNSON.

SASHEER ZAMETA.
AND YOUR HOST, DWAYNE JOHNSON.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, DWAYNE

AND YOUR HOST, DWAYNE JOHNSON.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, DWAYNE
JOHNSON.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, DWAYNE
JOHNSON.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

JOHNSON.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.

>> THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH.

THANK YOU.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
I FEEL VERY BLESSED TO BE BACK

THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
I FEEL VERY BLESSED TO BE BACK
HERE HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT

I FEEL VERY BLESSED TO BE BACK
HERE HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT
LIVE" FOR THE FOURTH TIME.

HERE HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT
LIVE" FOR THE FOURTH TIME.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

LIVE" FOR THE FOURTH TIME.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> NOW, FOURTH TIME FEELS RIGHT

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> NOW, FOURTH TIME FEELS RIGHT
TO ME, I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN IN A

>> NOW, FOURTH TIME FEELS RIGHT
TO ME, I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN IN A
LOT OF SEQUELS AND I'VE ADDED

TO ME, I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN IN A
LOT OF SEQUELS AND I'VE ADDED
SOME EXTRA OOMPH TO A LOT OF

LOT OF SEQUELS AND I'VE ADDED
SOME EXTRA OOMPH TO A LOT OF
FRANCHISES LIKE "THE MUMMY,"

SOME EXTRA OOMPH TO A LOT OF
FRANCHISES LIKE "THE MUMMY,"
"JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE

FRANCHISES LIKE "THE MUMMY,"
"JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE
EARTH" AND, OF COURSE, "THE FAST

"JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE
EARTH" AND, OF COURSE, "THE FAST
AND THE FURIOUS."

EARTH" AND, OF COURSE, "THE FAST
AND THE FURIOUS."
SOME FOLKS IN THE INDUSTRY HAVE

AND THE FURIOUS."
SOME FOLKS IN THE INDUSTRY HAVE
EVEN REFERRED TO ME AS FRANCHISE

SOME FOLKS IN THE INDUSTRY HAVE
EVEN REFERRED TO ME AS FRANCHISE
VIAGRA.

EVEN REFERRED TO ME AS FRANCHISE
VIAGRA.
♪

VIAGRA.
♪
TONIGHT I JUST WANTED TO SEND A

♪
TONIGHT I JUST WANTED TO SEND A
MESSAGE TO HOLLYWOOD PRODUCERS

TONIGHT I JUST WANTED TO SEND A
MESSAGE TO HOLLYWOOD PRODUCERS
OUT THERE WHO ARE LOOKING TO

MESSAGE TO HOLLYWOOD PRODUCERS
OUT THERE WHO ARE LOOKING TO
BEEF UP THEIR NEXT SEQUEL.

OUT THERE WHO ARE LOOKING TO
BEEF UP THEIR NEXT SEQUEL.
I'M AVAILABLE.

BEEF UP THEIR NEXT SEQUEL.
I'M AVAILABLE.
♪ IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR THAT

I'M AVAILABLE.
♪ IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR THAT
EXTRA SOMETHING ♪

♪ IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR THAT
EXTRA SOMETHING ♪
♪ YOU NEED THE BADDEST MOFO

EXTRA SOMETHING ♪
♪ YOU NEED THE BADDEST MOFO
SINCE CHARLES BRONSON ♪

♪ YOU NEED THE BADDEST MOFO
SINCE CHARLES BRONSON ♪
♪ ADD A DASH OF DWAYNE AND A

SINCE CHARLES BRONSON ♪
♪ ADD A DASH OF DWAYNE AND A
PINCH OF JOHNSON ♪

♪ ADD A DASH OF DWAYNE AND A
PINCH OF JOHNSON ♪
GIRLS CHECK THIS OUT.

PINCH OF JOHNSON ♪
GIRLS CHECK THIS OUT.
♪ PUT ME IN "FROZEN" OR "AVATAR

GIRLS CHECK THIS OUT.
♪ PUT ME IN "FROZEN" OR "AVATAR
2."

♪ PUT ME IN "FROZEN" OR "AVATAR
2."
DON'T NEED NO CGI ♪

2."
DON'T NEED NO CGI ♪
♪ THINK ANOTHER HOME ALONE WHERE

DON'T NEED NO CGI ♪
♪ THINK ANOTHER HOME ALONE WHERE
I'M THE KID ♪

♪ THINK ANOTHER HOME ALONE WHERE
I'M THE KID ♪
♪ BURGLARS TAKE A LOOK AT ME AND

I'M THE KID ♪
♪ BURGLARS TAKE A LOOK AT ME AND
THEY'RE LIKE SH -- ♪

♪ BURGLARS TAKE A LOOK AT ME AND
THEY'RE LIKE SH -- ♪
♪ ZERO DARK 30

THEY'RE LIKE SH -- ♪
♪ ZERO DARK 30
♪ ZERO DARK 31 I KILL HIS

♪ ZERO DARK 30
♪ ZERO DARK 31 I KILL HIS
GHOST ♪

♪ ZERO DARK 31 I KILL HIS
GHOST ♪
♪ CAUSE I'M FRANCHISE VIAGRA

GHOST ♪
♪ CAUSE I'M FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA

♪ CAUSE I'M FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA

♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
>> WHAT ABOUT THE NEW BATMAN.

♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
>> WHAT ABOUT THE NEW BATMAN.
>> I CAN PLAY VAIN, I'LL EVEN

>> WHAT ABOUT THE NEW BATMAN.
>> I CAN PLAY VAIN, I'LL EVEN
PLAY BRUCE WELL.

>> I CAN PLAY VAIN, I'LL EVEN
PLAY BRUCE WELL.
I'LL EVEN PLAY MICHAEL CAINE.

PLAY BRUCE WELL.
I'LL EVEN PLAY MICHAEL CAINE.
♪ BE THE FOURTH AMEE GO THE

I'LL EVEN PLAY MICHAEL CAINE.
♪ BE THE FOURTH AMEE GO THE
EIGHTH SAMURAI ♪

♪ BE THE FOURTH AMEE GO THE
EIGHTH SAMURAI ♪
♪ AND THE NEXT PRESIDENT

EIGHTH SAMURAI ♪
♪ AND THE NEXT PRESIDENT
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA FRANCHISE

♪ AND THE NEXT PRESIDENT
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA FRANCHISE
VIAGRA ♪

♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA FRANCHISE
VIAGRA ♪
♪ OH, YEAH, GET YOUR MOVIE

VIAGRA ♪
♪ OH, YEAH, GET YOUR MOVIE
BONERS UP ♪

♪ OH, YEAH, GET YOUR MOVIE
BONERS UP ♪
♪ 50 SHADES OF GREY

BONERS UP ♪
♪ 50 SHADES OF GREY
♪ I DO 50 A DAY

♪ 50 SHADES OF GREY
♪ I DO 50 A DAY
>> TOY STORY 4 ♪

♪ I DO 50 A DAY
>> TOY STORY 4 ♪
♪ ANOTHER SMURF MOVIE?

>> TOY STORY 4 ♪
♪ ANOTHER SMURF MOVIE?
>> NO.

♪ ANOTHER SMURF MOVIE?
>> NO.
>> THAT'S FAIR ENOUGH.

>> NO.
>> THAT'S FAIR ENOUGH.
THAT'S FAIR ENOUGH.

>> THAT'S FAIR ENOUGH.
THAT'S FAIR ENOUGH.
♪ OSCAR MOVIES THIS YEAR, DIDN'T

THAT'S FAIR ENOUGH.
♪ OSCAR MOVIES THIS YEAR, DIDN'T
MAKE NO DOUGH ♪

♪ OSCAR MOVIES THIS YEAR, DIDN'T
MAKE NO DOUGH ♪
♪ EVEN BIRD MAN COULD HAVE USED

MAKE NO DOUGH ♪
♪ EVEN BIRD MAN COULD HAVE USED
THE PEOPLE'S ELMO ♪

♪ EVEN BIRD MAN COULD HAVE USED
THE PEOPLE'S ELMO ♪
♪ BOYHOOD 2

THE PEOPLE'S ELMO ♪
♪ BOYHOOD 2
♪ THE KID IS JACKED

♪ BOYHOOD 2
♪ THE KID IS JACKED
♪ THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING

♪ THE KID IS JACKED
♪ THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING
>> CAN YOU SMELL WHAT STEVEN

♪ THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING
>> CAN YOU SMELL WHAT STEVEN
HAWKING IS COOKING?

>> CAN YOU SMELL WHAT STEVEN
HAWKING IS COOKING?
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA

HAWKING IS COOKING?
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA

♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA

♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

♪ FRANCHISE VIAGRA
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> WE HAVE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> WE HAVE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR
YOU TONIGHT.

>> WE HAVE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR
YOU TONIGHT.
GEORGE EZRA IS IN THE HOUSE.

YOU TONIGHT.
GEORGE EZRA IS IN THE HOUSE.
SO STICK AROUND, WE WILL BE

GEORGE EZRA IS IN THE HOUSE.
SO STICK AROUND, WE WILL BE
RIGHT BACK.

SO STICK AROUND, WE WILL BE
RIGHT BACK.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

RIGHT BACK.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> LAST WEEK, STARBUCKS CREATED

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> LAST WEEK, STARBUCKS CREATED
THE RACE TOGETHER CAMPAIGN,

>>> LAST WEEK, STARBUCKS CREATED
THE RACE TOGETHER CAMPAIGN,
WHICH CREATED BARRISE TAS TO

THE RACE TOGETHER CAMPAIGN,
WHICH CREATED BARRISE TAS TO
START A DIALOGUE ABOUT RACE.

WHICH CREATED BARRISE TAS TO
START A DIALOGUE ABOUT RACE.
IT WAS A WAY TO OPEN MINDS AND

START A DIALOGUE ABOUT RACE.
IT WAS A WAY TO OPEN MINDS AND
SHARE THOUGHTS.

IT WAS A WAY TO OPEN MINDS AND
SHARE THOUGHTS.
WE THINK STARBUCKS IS ON THE

SHARE THOUGHTS.
WE THINK STARBUCKS IS ON THE
RIGHT TRACK.

WE THINK STARBUCKS IS ON THE
RIGHT TRACK.
WE AT PEP BOYS ARE STARTING A

RIGHT TRACK.
WE AT PEP BOYS ARE STARTING A
CONVERSATION TOO.

WE AT PEP BOYS ARE STARTING A
CONVERSATION TOO.
THIS MONTH, ALL PEP BOYS

CONVERSATION TOO.
THIS MONTH, ALL PEP BOYS
MECHANICS ARE ENCOURAGED TO

THIS MONTH, ALL PEP BOYS
MECHANICS ARE ENCOURAGED TO
START A DIALOGUE WITH YOU, THE

MECHANICS ARE ENCOURAGED TO
START A DIALOGUE WITH YOU, THE
CUSTOMER, ABOUT GENDER AND

START A DIALOGUE WITH YOU, THE
CUSTOMER, ABOUT GENDER AND
SEXUAL IDENTITY.

CUSTOMER, ABOUT GENDER AND
SEXUAL IDENTITY.
IT'S PART OF PEP BOYS NEW GENDER

SEXUAL IDENTITY.
IT'S PART OF PEP BOYS NEW GENDER
FLEX CAMPAIGN.

IT'S PART OF PEP BOYS NEW GENDER
FLEX CAMPAIGN.
>> I SUPPORT WHATEVER PEOPLE

FLEX CAMPAIGN.
>> I SUPPORT WHATEVER PEOPLE
WANT TO DO.

>> I SUPPORT WHATEVER PEOPLE
WANT TO DO.
IF YOU'RE A GUY, AND YOU WANT TO

WANT TO DO.
IF YOU'RE A GUY, AND YOU WANT TO
BE A GIRL, THAT'S GREAT.

IF YOU'RE A GUY, AND YOU WANT TO
BE A GIRL, THAT'S GREAT.
ME PERSONALLY, I COULD NEVER CUT

BE A GIRL, THAT'S GREAT.
ME PERSONALLY, I COULD NEVER CUT
OFF MY [ BLEEP ].

ME PERSONALLY, I COULD NEVER CUT
OFF MY [ BLEEP ].
>> IF WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THESE

OFF MY [ BLEEP ].
>> IF WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THESE
ISSUES, WHO WILL?

>> IF WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THESE
ISSUES, WHO WILL?
>> I GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU,

ISSUES, WHO WILL?
>> I GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU,
YOU'RE GAY, RIGHT?

>> I GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU,
YOU'RE GAY, RIGHT?
>> YES, I AM.

YOU'RE GAY, RIGHT?
>> YES, I AM.
>> ARE YOU ALLOWED TO SAY LIKE,

>> YES, I AM.
>> ARE YOU ALLOWED TO SAY LIKE,
THAT'S GAY?

>> ARE YOU ALLOWED TO SAY LIKE,
THAT'S GAY?
>> I GUESS I CAN.

THAT'S GAY?
>> I GUESS I CAN.
>> OH, MAN, YOU ARE SO LUCKY.

>> I GUESS I CAN.
>> OH, MAN, YOU ARE SO LUCKY.
HE GETS TO SAY THAT'S SO GAY.

>> OH, MAN, YOU ARE SO LUCKY.
HE GETS TO SAY THAT'S SO GAY.
>> OH, SO LUCKY.

HE GETS TO SAY THAT'S SO GAY.
>> OH, SO LUCKY.
>> OUR MECHANICS ARE READY TO

>> OH, SO LUCKY.
>> OUR MECHANICS ARE READY TO
START A CONVERSATION WITH YOU.

>> OUR MECHANICS ARE READY TO
START A CONVERSATION WITH YOU.
>> IF YOU HAVE BOTH PARTS DOWN

START A CONVERSATION WITH YOU.
>> IF YOU HAVE BOTH PARTS DOWN
THERE, BE PROUD.

>> IF YOU HAVE BOTH PARTS DOWN
THERE, BE PROUD.
IF I HAD BOTH, I'D BE DOING

THERE, BE PROUD.
IF I HAD BOTH, I'D BE DOING
MYSELF ALL DAY LONG.

IF I HAD BOTH, I'D BE DOING
MYSELF ALL DAY LONG.
>> PLEASE GO GET MY CAR.

MYSELF ALL DAY LONG.
>> PLEASE GO GET MY CAR.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT MY FAVORITE

>> PLEASE GO GET MY CAR.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT MY FAVORITE
SHOW IS?

>> YOU KNOW WHAT MY FAVORITE
SHOW IS?
ELLEN.

SHOW IS?
ELLEN.
THAT'S IMPORTANT, BECAUSE SHE

ELLEN.
THAT'S IMPORTANT, BECAUSE SHE
USED TO BE A MAN.

THAT'S IMPORTANT, BECAUSE SHE
USED TO BE A MAN.
>> NO, SHE DIDN'T.

USED TO BE A MAN.
>> NO, SHE DIDN'T.
>> YES, SHE DID.

>> NO, SHE DIDN'T.
>> YES, SHE DID.
>> NO, SHE DIDN'T.

>> YES, SHE DID.
>> NO, SHE DIDN'T.
>> WILL YOU GO GET MY CAR.

>> NO, SHE DIDN'T.
>> WILL YOU GO GET MY CAR.
>> THE ONLY THING MORE IMPORTANT

>> WILL YOU GO GET MY CAR.
>> THE ONLY THING MORE IMPORTANT
THAN YOUR CAR IS TAKING THE TIME

>> THE ONLY THING MORE IMPORTANT
THAN YOUR CAR IS TAKING THE TIME
TO GENDERFLECT.

THAN YOUR CAR IS TAKING THE TIME
TO GENDERFLECT.
>> I THINK MY COUSIN'S KID GOT

TO GENDERFLECT.
>> I THINK MY COUSIN'S KID GOT
BORN WRONG.

>> I THINK MY COUSIN'S KID GOT
BORN WRONG.
WELL, THAT'S THE THING, IT'S NOT

BORN WRONG.
WELL, THAT'S THE THING, IT'S NOT
WRONG IF IT'S RIGHT TO HIM.

WELL, THAT'S THE THING, IT'S NOT
WRONG IF IT'S RIGHT TO HIM.
>> OKAY.

WRONG IF IT'S RIGHT TO HIM.
>> OKAY.
>> ANYWAY, YOUR CAR'S TOTAL.

>> OKAY.
>> ANYWAY, YOUR CAR'S TOTAL.
>> PEP BOYS, FOR BOYS OR GIRLS.

>> ANYWAY, YOUR CAR'S TOTAL.
>> PEP BOYS, FOR BOYS OR GIRLS.
>> OR THE THIRD WHERE YOU'RE

>> PEP BOYS, FOR BOYS OR GIRLS.
>> OR THE THIRD WHERE YOU'RE
BOTH.

>> OR THE THIRD WHERE YOU'RE
BOTH.
>> DO I NEED NEW BRAKE PADS?

BOTH.
>> DO I NEED NEW BRAKE PADS?
>>> MOVING ON TO THE NEXT PROMO,

>> DO I NEED NEW BRAKE PADS?
>>> MOVING ON TO THE NEXT PROMO,
LET'S GET OUR NEXT TWO WRESTLERS

>>> MOVING ON TO THE NEXT PROMO,
LET'S GET OUR NEXT TWO WRESTLERS
IN THERE.

LET'S GET OUR NEXT TWO WRESTLERS
IN THERE.
COCOA WATCH OUT.

IN THERE.
COCOA WATCH OUT.
AND TRASH YARD MUTT.

COCOA WATCH OUT.
AND TRASH YARD MUTT.
>> GREAT.

AND TRASH YARD MUTT.
>> GREAT.
>> HOW ARE YOU DOING?

>> GREAT.
>> HOW ARE YOU DOING?
>> CAN'T WAIT TO WORK WITH YOU,

>> HOW ARE YOU DOING?
>> CAN'T WAIT TO WORK WITH YOU,
MAN.

>> CAN'T WAIT TO WORK WITH YOU,
MAN.
THIS WILL BE GREAT.

MAN.
THIS WILL BE GREAT.
>> FEEL FREE TO LET LOOSE IN

THIS WILL BE GREAT.
>> FEEL FREE TO LET LOOSE IN
PTHIS PROMO, DON'.

>> FEEL FREE TO LET LOOSE IN
PTHIS PROMO, DON'.
>> YOU SURE?

PTHIS PROMO, DON'.
>> YOU SURE?
>> DEFINITELY, GO FOR IT, MAN.

>> YOU SURE?
>> DEFINITELY, GO FOR IT, MAN.
SAY WHATEVER.

>> DEFINITELY, GO FOR IT, MAN.
SAY WHATEVER.
>> EVERYBODY SET?

SAY WHATEVER.
>> EVERYBODY SET?
>> YEAH, YEAH.

>> EVERYBODY SET?
>> YEAH, YEAH.
>> AND, ACTION.

>> YEAH, YEAH.
>> AND, ACTION.
>> I'M HERE WITH OUR MAIN EVENT

>> AND, ACTION.
>> I'M HERE WITH OUR MAIN EVENT
COMPETITORS, AND THERE'S NO LE

>> I'M HERE WITH OUR MAIN EVENT
COMPETITORS, AND THERE'S NO LE
PLOSS BETWEEN THESE TWO,

COMPETITORS, AND THERE'S NO LE
PLOSS BETWEEN THESE TWO,
THAT RIGHT?

PLOSS BETWEEN THESE TWO,
THAT RIGHT?
>> YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.

THAT RIGHT?
>> YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.
PBECAUSE WHEN THE

>> YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.
PBECAUSE WHEN THE
>> YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.

PBECAUSE WHEN THE
>> YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.
PMUTTPTHING HE'S GOING T

>> YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.
PMUTTPTHING HE'S GOING T
RPROUT THIS BIG OLD PIL

PMUTTPTHING HE'S GOING T
RPROUT THIS BIG OLD PIL
STINKIN'>> WHAT DO YOU HAT

RPROUT THIS BIG OLD PIL
STINKIN'>> WHAT DO YOU HAT
THAT, COCOA?

STINKIN'>> WHAT DO YOU HAT
THAT, COCOA?
>> LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING

THAT, COCOA?
>> LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING
ABOUT THIS GUY.

>> LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING
ABOUT THIS GUY.
HE HAS HERPES.

ABOUT THIS GUY.
HE HAS HERPES.
IT'S TRUE.

HE HAS HERPES.
IT'S TRUE.
HE'S GOT HERPES AND HE'S GOT IT

IT'S TRUE.
HE'S GOT HERPES AND HE'S GOT IT
BAD.

HE'S GOT HERPES AND HE'S GOT IT
BAD.
>> YEAH.

BAD.
>> YEAH.
RTRP>> YEAH, WELL -- YO

>> YEAH.
RTRP>> YEAH, WELL -- YO
PBE WEARING A BODY BAG

RTRP>> YEAH, WELL -- YO
PBE WEARING A BODY BAG
THROUGH WITH YOU.

PBE WEARING A BODY BAG
THROUGH WITH YOU.
>> YOU CAN'T HAVE SEX WITH

THROUGH WITH YOU.
>> YOU CAN'T HAVE SEX WITH
ANYONE WITHOUT HAVING A TALK

>> YOU CAN'T HAVE SEX WITH
ANYONE WITHOUT HAVING A TALK
FIRST.

ANYONE WITHOUT HAVING A TALK
FIRST.
BECAUSE OF YOUR

FIRST.
BECAUSE OF YOUR
FIRST.

BECAUSE OF YOUR
FIRST.
HERPES.

FIRST.
HERPES.
PI HEATHE MOST HERPES

HERPES.
PI HEATHE MOST HERPES
SEEN.

PI HEATHE MOST HERPES
SEEN.
>> WELL, YOU HEARD IT HERE

SEEN.
>> WELL, YOU HEARD IT HERE
FIRST.

>> WELL, YOU HEARD IT HERE
FIRST.
JUNKYARD MUTT HAS HERPES.

FIRST.
JUNKYARD MUTT HAS HERPES.
AND IT ALL GETS SETTLED THIS

JUNKYARD MUTT HAS HERPES.
AND IT ALL GETS SETTLED THIS
SUNDAY AT WRESTLEMANIA.

AND IT ALL GETS SETTLED THIS
SUNDAY AT WRESTLEMANIA.
>> WWHAT DID YOU

SUNDAY AT WRESTLEMANIA.
>> WWHAT DID YOU
PRETTY GOOD, RIGHT?

>> WWHAT DID YOU
PRETTY GOOD, RIGHT?
>> NO, NO REALLY, THAT STUFF WAS

PRETTY GOOD, RIGHT?
>> NO, NO REALLY, THAT STUFF WAS
KIND OF PERSONAL.

>> NO, NO REALLY, THAT STUFF WAS
KIND OF PERSONAL.
MAYBE YOU TALK MORE ABOUT STUFF

KIND OF PERSONAL.
MAYBE YOU TALK MORE ABOUT STUFF
YOU'RE GOING TO DO TO ME IN THE

MAYBE YOU TALK MORE ABOUT STUFF
YOU'RE GOING TO DO TO ME IN THE
RING OR SOMETHING.R>>.

YOU'RE GOING TO DO TO ME IN THE
RING OR SOMETHING.R>>.
TR>> PROMO TAKE.

RING OR SOMETHING.R>>.
TR>> PROMO TAKE.
AND ACTION.

TR>> PROMO TAKE.
AND ACTION.
P>> THERE'S NO LOVE LOSS

AND ACTION.
P>> THERE'S NO LOVE LOSS
RP>> OH, YEAH, WHEN WT

P>> THERE'S NO LOVE LOSS
RP>> OH, YEAH, WHEN WT
RPRING ON SUNDAY, I'M

RP>> OH, YEAH, WHEN WT
RPRING ON SUNDAY, I'M
TELL EVERYBODY ABOUT WHAT I

RPRING ON SUNDAY, I'M
TELL EVERYBODY ABOUT WHAT I
FOUND ON HIS COMPUTER.

TELL EVERYBODY ABOUT WHAT I
FOUND ON HIS COMPUTER.
IT'S FULL OF PORN.

FOUND ON HIS COMPUTER.
IT'S FULL OF PORN.
RHE'S GOOGLING

IT'S FULL OF PORN.
RHE'S GOOGLING
R SEX BRYAN.

RHE'S GOOGLING
R SEX BRYAN.
RPAND BRYAN'S THE .

R SEX BRYAN.
RPAND BRYAN'S THE .
>> I LIKEPHOW DO YOU.

RPAND BRYAN'S THE .
>> I LIKEPHOW DO YOU.
RPRP>> I HIRED A RES

>> I LIKEPHOW DO YOU.
RPRP>> I HIRED A RES
RDIG UP DIRT ON YOU.

RPRP>> I HIRED A RES
RDIG UP DIRT ON YOU.
AND THEY FOUND OUT.

RDIG UP DIRT ON YOU.
AND THEY FOUND OUT.
YOU REMEMBER THE COLLEGE

AND THEY FOUND OUT.
YOU REMEMBER THE COLLEGE
GIRLFRIEND DONNA?

YOU REMEMBER THE COLLEGE
GIRLFRIEND DONNA?
IT TURNS OUT EIGHT MONTHS AFTER

GIRLFRIEND DONNA?
IT TURNS OUT EIGHT MONTHS AFTER
YOU BROKE UP, SHE HAD A BABY

IT TURNS OUT EIGHT MONTHS AFTER
YOU BROKE UP, SHE HAD A BABY
GIRL.

YOU BROKE UP, SHE HAD A BABY
GIRL.
EVELYN.

GIRL.
EVELYN.
>> WHAT?

EVELYN.
>> WHAT?
>> I MET HER, SHE'S A LOVELY

>> WHAT?
>> I MET HER, SHE'S A LOVELY
GIRL.

>> I MET HER, SHE'S A LOVELY
GIRL.
HONOR STUDENT, AND SHE DOESN'T

GIRL.
HONOR STUDENT, AND SHE DOESN'T
WANT TO HAVE A THING TO DO WITH

HONOR STUDENT, AND SHE DOESN'T
WANT TO HAVE A THING TO DO WITH
YOU, MAN.

WANT TO HAVE A THING TO DO WITH
YOU, MAN.
YOU'LL NEVER MEET HER, BECAUSE

YOU, MAN.
YOU'LL NEVER MEET HER, BECAUSE
YOU'RE NOT FIT TO BE A DAD, AND

YOU'LL NEVER MEET HER, BECAUSE
YOU'RE NOT FIT TO BE A DAD, AND
THAT'S WHAT COCOA IS COOKING.

YOU'RE NOT FIT TO BE A DAD, AND
THAT'S WHAT COCOA IS COOKING.
[ CHEERS AN>> WHAT DO YOU H

THAT'S WHAT COCOA IS COOKING.
[ CHEERS AN>> WHAT DO YOU H
THAT, MUTT?

[ CHEERS AN>> WHAT DO YOU H
THAT, MUTT?
FOLKS, ANDPIT ALL GETS.

THAT, MUTT?
FOLKS, ANDPIT ALL GETS.
>> CUT, CUT.

FOLKS, ANDPIT ALL GETS.
>> CUT, CUT.
PI LIKE THAT, YOU GUYS

>> CUT, CUT.
PI LIKE THAT, YOU GUYS
THAT ONE?

PI LIKE THAT, YOU GUYS
THAT ONE?
>> NO.

THAT ONE?
>> NO.
YOU SAID JUST LIKE --

>> NO.
YOU SAID JUST LIKE --
>> I CAN'T GET BACK, MAN.

YOU SAID JUST LIKE --
>> I CAN'T GET BACK, MAN.
JUST DO NORMAL STUFF, LIKE HOW

>> I CAN'T GET BACK, MAN.
JUST DO NORMAL STUFF, LIKE HOW
YOU'RE GOING TO FIGHT ME.

JUST DO NORMAL STUFF, LIKE HOW
YOU'RE GOING TO FIGHT ME.
>> I'M GOING TO RIP THIS GUY

YOU'RE GOING TO FIGHT ME.
>> I'M GOING TO RIP THIS GUY
APART, AND I MEAN

>> I'M GOING TO RIP THIS GUY
APART, AND I MEAN
PSYCHOLOGICALLY.

APART, AND I MEAN
PSYCHOLOGICALLY.
THE INTERNET, THE COLLEGE

PSYCHOLOGICALLY.
THE INTERNET, THE COLLEGE
STUDENT THAT LIVES IN HAWAII,

THE INTERNET, THE COLLEGE
STUDENT THAT LIVES IN HAWAII,
THAT YOU'VE NEVER MET IN PERSON?

STUDENT THAT LIVES IN HAWAII,
THAT YOU'VE NEVER MET IN PERSON?
>> NO.

THAT YOU'VE NEVER MET IN PERSON?
>> NO.
>> SHE'S REALLY NOT A COLLEGE

>> NO.
>> SHE'S REALLY NOT A COLLEGE
STUDENT AND HER MIDDLE NAME IS

>> SHE'S REALLY NOT A COLLEGE
STUDENT AND HER MIDDLE NAME IS
NOT REALLY STACY, IT'S COCOA.

STUDENT AND HER MIDDLE NAME IS
NOT REALLY STACY, IT'S COCOA.
>> SOUNDS RIGHT.

NOT REALLY STACY, IT'S COCOA.
>> SOUNDS RIGHT.
>> SHE IS YOUR BABY, AND YOU HAD

>> SOUNDS RIGHT.
>> SHE IS YOUR BABY, AND YOU HAD
NO IDEA.

>> SHE IS YOUR BABY, AND YOU HAD
NO IDEA.
>> THAT IS SO INTRICATE.

NO IDEA.
>> THAT IS SO INTRICATE.
WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?

>> THAT IS SO INTRICATE.
WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?
>> YOU KNOW THE PICTURE OF

WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?
>> YOU KNOW THE PICTURE OF
STACY, YOU'VE BEEN SPANKING IT

>> YOU KNOW THE PICTURE OF
STACY, YOU'VE BEEN SPANKING IT
TOO?

STACY, YOU'VE BEEN SPANKING IT
TOO?
IT'S ACTUALLY A PICTURE OF

TOO?
IT'S ACTUALLY A PICTURE OF
EVELYN, THE DAUGHTER YOU NEVER

IT'S ACTUALLY A PICTURE OF
EVELYN, THE DAUGHTER YOU NEVER
MET.

EVELYN, THE DAUGHTER YOU NEVER
MET.
>> I THINK I'M GOING TO BE SICK.

MET.
>> I THINK I'M GOING TO BE SICK.
>> WELL, THERE YOU HAVE IT,

>> I THINK I'M GOING TO BE SICK.
>> WELL, THERE YOU HAVE IT,
FOLKS, IT'S ALL THE SETTLED AT

>> WELL, THERE YOU HAVE IT,
FOLKS, IT'S ALL THE SETTLED AT
WRESTLEMANIA, THIS SUNDAY.

FOLKS, IT'S ALL THE SETTLED AT
WRESTLEMANIA, THIS SUNDAY.
>> THAT'S WHAT COCOA'S COOKIN'.

WRESTLEMANIA, THIS SUNDAY.
>> THAT'S WHAT COCOA'S COOKIN'.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

>> THAT'S WHAT COCOA'S COOKIN'.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> YOU ARE COCOA.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> YOU ARE COCOA.
>> YOU ARE COCOA.

>> YOU ARE COCOA.
>> YOU ARE COCOA.
>>> WALT DISNEY HAS BROUGHT THE

>> YOU ARE COCOA.
>>> WALT DISNEY HAS BROUGHT THE
MAGIC BACK, BY TURNING YOUR

>>> WALT DISNEY HAS BROUGHT THE
MAGIC BACK, BY TURNING YOUR
FAVORITE ANIMATED CLASSICS INTO

MAGIC BACK, BY TURNING YOUR
FAVORITE ANIMATED CLASSICS INTO
LIVE ACTION.

FAVORITE ANIMATED CLASSICS INTO
LIVE ACTION.
AND IN 2016, DISNEY BRINGS YOU

LIVE ACTION.
AND IN 2016, DISNEY BRINGS YOU
THE BIGGEST REMAKE YET.

AND IN 2016, DISNEY BRINGS YOU
THE BIGGEST REMAKE YET.
♪

THE BIGGEST REMAKE YET.
♪
>> WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

♪
>> WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'M BAMBI.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'M BAMBI.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> I'M BAMBI.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> FROM THE DIRECTOR OF

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> FROM THE DIRECTOR OF
"FURIOUS 7" COMES A NEW DISNEY

>> FROM THE DIRECTOR OF
"FURIOUS 7" COMES A NEW DISNEY
CLASSIC ON OVERDRIVE.

"FURIOUS 7" COMES A NEW DISNEY
CLASSIC ON OVERDRIVE.
BAMBI, STARRING DWAYNE

CLASSIC ON OVERDRIVE.
BAMBI, STARRING DWAYNE
"THE ROCK" JOHNSON AS BAMBI.

BAMBI, STARRING DWAYNE
"THE ROCK" JOHNSON AS BAMBI.
>> WHEN I WAS A BOY, THEY TOOK

"THE ROCK" JOHNSON AS BAMBI.
>> WHEN I WAS A BOY, THEY TOOK
AWAY MY MOTHER.

>> WHEN I WAS A BOY, THEY TOOK
AWAY MY MOTHER.
[ LAUGHTER ]

AWAY MY MOTHER.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> MOMMY.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> MOMMY.
>> NOW IT'S TIME FOR THEM TO

>> MOMMY.
>> NOW IT'S TIME FOR THEM TO
PAY, DEARLY.

>> NOW IT'S TIME FOR THEM TO
PAY, DEARLY.
>> VIN DIESEL AS THUMPER.

PAY, DEARLY.
>> VIN DIESEL AS THUMPER.
>> WHY DO THEY CALL YOU THUMPER?

>> VIN DIESEL AS THUMPER.
>> WHY DO THEY CALL YOU THUMPER?
>> 'CAUSE I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.

>> WHY DO THEY CALL YOU THUMPER?
>> 'CAUSE I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> 'CAUSE I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WHAT?

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WHAT?
>> I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.

>> WHAT?
>> I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.
>> YEAH, IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING,

>> I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.
>> YEAH, IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING,
HUH?

>> YEAH, IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING,
HUH?
>> NO, I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.

HUH?
>> NO, I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> NO, I'M ALWAYS THUMPING.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> TYRESE GIBSON AS FLOWER.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> TYRESE GIBSON AS FLOWER.
>> I SMELL BAD, BUT I LOOK GOOD.

>> TYRESE GIBSON AS FLOWER.
>> I SMELL BAD, BUT I LOOK GOOD.
WHOO!

>> I SMELL BAD, BUT I LOOK GOOD.
WHOO!
[ LAUGHTER ]

WHOO!
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> MICHELLE RODRIGEZ AS FALINE,

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> MICHELLE RODRIGEZ AS FALINE,
A.K.A THE GIRL BAMBI.

>> MICHELLE RODRIGEZ AS FALINE,
A.K.A THE GIRL BAMBI.
THEY CALL THEMSELVES TANGLEWOOD,

A.K.A THE GIRL BAMBI.
THEY CALL THEMSELVES TANGLEWOOD,
THEY'RE A HUNTING CLUB AND THEY

THEY CALL THEMSELVES TANGLEWOOD,
THEY'RE A HUNTING CLUB AND THEY
KILL FOR SPORT.

THEY'RE A HUNTING CLUB AND THEY
KILL FOR SPORT.
LIKE IT OR NOT, IT'S ALL PART OF

KILL FOR SPORT.
LIKE IT OR NOT, IT'S ALL PART OF
THE GAME.

LIKE IT OR NOT, IT'S ALL PART OF
THE GAME.
ME, YOU, AND ALL OUR FOREST

THE GAME.
ME, YOU, AND ALL OUR FOREST
FRIENDS.

ME, YOU, AND ALL OUR FOREST
FRIENDS.
>> I AIN'T GOT FRIENDS.

FRIENDS.
>> I AIN'T GOT FRIENDS.
I GOT HER.

>> I AIN'T GOT FRIENDS.
I GOT HER.
>> SUICIDE MISSION.

I GOT HER.
>> SUICIDE MISSION.
>> WELL, IF WE'RE GOING OUT,

>> SUICIDE MISSION.
>> WELL, IF WE'RE GOING OUT,
WE'RE GOING OUT TOGETHER.

>> WELL, IF WE'RE GOING OUT,
WE'RE GOING OUT TOGETHER.
>> ONE LAST RIDE.

WE'RE GOING OUT TOGETHER.
>> ONE LAST RIDE.
>> WHOO!

>> ONE LAST RIDE.
>> WHOO!
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> WHOO!
[ LAUGHTER ]
♪

[ LAUGHTER ]
♪
>> WHAT'S THE MATTER?

♪
>> WHAT'S THE MATTER?
NEVER SEEN A DEER IN THE

>> WHAT'S THE MATTER?
NEVER SEEN A DEER IN THE
HEADLIGHTS?

NEVER SEEN A DEER IN THE
HEADLIGHTS?
[ LAUGHTER ]

HEADLIGHTS?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> SURPRISE.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> SURPRISE.
WHOO!

>> SURPRISE.
WHOO!
[ SCREAMING ]

WHOO!
[ SCREAMING ]
>> WHERE ARE THEY?

[ SCREAMING ]
>> WHERE ARE THEY?
WHEN YOU SEE THEM, GIVE ME A

>> WHERE ARE THEY?
WHEN YOU SEE THEM, GIVE ME A
SIGN.

WHEN YOU SEE THEM, GIVE ME A
SIGN.
>> HERE'S A SIGN.

SIGN.
>> HERE'S A SIGN.
DEER CROSSING, MOTHER [ BLEEP ].

>> HERE'S A SIGN.
DEER CROSSING, MOTHER [ BLEEP ].
[ LAUGHTER ]

DEER CROSSING, MOTHER [ BLEEP ].
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> BAMBI, FEATURING A NEW SINGLE

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> BAMBI, FEATURING A NEW SINGLE
FROM LUDACRIS, "WHAM, BAM,

>> BAMBI, FEATURING A NEW SINGLE
FROM LUDACRIS, "WHAM, BAM,
BAMBI."

FROM LUDACRIS, "WHAM, BAM,
BAMBI."
♪ WHAM BAM BAMBI

BAMBI."
♪ WHAM BAM BAMBI
♪ LUDA

♪ WHAM BAM BAMBI
♪ LUDA
>> DISNEY'S "BAMBI," GET BUCKED.

♪ LUDA
>> DISNEY'S "BAMBI," GET BUCKED.
JUNE 2016.

>> DISNEY'S "BAMBI," GET BUCKED.
JUNE 2016.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

JUNE 2016.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> OH, WOW!

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> OH, WOW!
THIS DINNER WAS PERFECT, WHAT A

>>> OH, WOW!
THIS DINNER WAS PERFECT, WHAT A
PERFECT ANNIVERSARY.

THIS DINNER WAS PERFECT, WHAT A
PERFECT ANNIVERSARY.
>> ANYTHING FOR YOU, SWEETHEART.

PERFECT ANNIVERSARY.
>> ANYTHING FOR YOU, SWEETHEART.
>> OH, MY GOD, THIS IS CRAZY, NO

>> ANYTHING FOR YOU, SWEETHEART.
>> OH, MY GOD, THIS IS CRAZY, NO
WAY, YOU RECOGNIZE ME?

>> OH, MY GOD, THIS IS CRAZY, NO
WAY, YOU RECOGNIZE ME?
?

WAY, YOU RECOGNIZE ME?
?
I FEEL LIKE I JUST GOT HIT IN MY

?
I FEEL LIKE I JUST GOT HIT IN MY
BRAIN WITH NO PROTECTION.

I FEEL LIKE I JUST GOT HIT IN MY
BRAIN WITH NO PROTECTION.
>> I'M SORRY, I'M HAVING A HARD

BRAIN WITH NO PROTECTION.
>> I'M SORRY, I'M HAVING A HARD
TIME PLACING YOU.

>> I'M SORRY, I'M HAVING A HARD
TIME PLACING YOU.
>> JURY DUTY.

TIME PLACING YOU.
>> JURY DUTY.
REMEMBER, WE SENT THAT GUY TO

>> JURY DUTY.
REMEMBER, WE SENT THAT GUY TO
THE CHAIR TOGETHER.

REMEMBER, WE SENT THAT GUY TO
THE CHAIR TOGETHER.
>> OH, YEAH.

THE CHAIR TOGETHER.
>> OH, YEAH.
>> YOU SENT A GUY TO THE CHAIR?

>> OH, YEAH.
>> YOU SENT A GUY TO THE CHAIR?
>> I DIDN'T WANT TO, I JUST

>> YOU SENT A GUY TO THE CHAIR?
>> I DIDN'T WANT TO, I JUST
NEEDED IT TO END.

>> I DIDN'T WANT TO, I JUST
NEEDED IT TO END.
>> CAN WE JOIN YOU?

NEEDED IT TO END.
>> CAN WE JOIN YOU?
>> WE SHOULD.

>> CAN WE JOIN YOU?
>> WE SHOULD.
THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND JEM MA,

>> WE SHOULD.
THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND JEM MA,
SHE'S KBRISH.

THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND JEM MA,
SHE'S KBRISH.
BUT DON'T GET A BONER WHEN SHE

SHE'S KBRISH.
BUT DON'T GET A BONER WHEN SHE
TALKS.

BUT DON'T GET A BONER WHEN SHE
TALKS.
>> HI, I'M JEMMA, I'M FRENCH.

TALKS.
>> HI, I'M JEMMA, I'M FRENCH.
>> MOVE OVER.

>> HI, I'M JEMMA, I'M FRENCH.
>> MOVE OVER.
>> I DON'T WANT TO BLOCK YOUR

>> MOVE OVER.
>> I DON'T WANT TO BLOCK YOUR
KNEES AND POP THEM THROUGH YOUR

>> I DON'T WANT TO BLOCK YOUR
KNEES AND POP THEM THROUGH YOUR
BACK.

KNEES AND POP THEM THROUGH YOUR
BACK.
>> SHE'S BRITISH.

BACK.
>> SHE'S BRITISH.
>> TELL THEM WHO YOU USED TO

>> SHE'S BRITISH.
>> TELL THEM WHO YOU USED TO
DATE?

>> TELL THEM WHO YOU USED TO
DATE?
>> FUTBOLERS.

DATE?
>> FUTBOLERS.
>> ISN'T THAT HOT?

>> FUTBOLERS.
>> ISN'T THAT HOT?
IT MAKES YOU THINK ABOUT WHAT

>> ISN'T THAT HOT?
IT MAKES YOU THINK ABOUT WHAT
SHE MIGHT DO WITH YOUR FOOT TO

IT MAKES YOU THINK ABOUT WHAT
SHE MIGHT DO WITH YOUR FOOT TO
YOUR BOYS.

SHE MIGHT DO WITH YOUR FOOT TO
YOUR BOYS.
>> BABE, I WANT SOME NIBBLES.

YOUR BOYS.
>> BABE, I WANT SOME NIBBLES.
>> SHE MEANS APPS.

>> BABE, I WANT SOME NIBBLES.
>> SHE MEANS APPS.
>> SAY IT AGAIN?

>> SHE MEANS APPS.
>> SAY IT AGAIN?
>> NIBBLES.

>> SAY IT AGAIN?
>> NIBBLES.
>> I'M NOT DOING TOO GOOD RIGHT

>> NIBBLES.
>> I'M NOT DOING TOO GOOD RIGHT
NOW.

>> I'M NOT DOING TOO GOOD RIGHT
NOW.
HOW ARE YOU?

NOW.
HOW ARE YOU?
>> YOU'RE NOT HARD, ARE YOU,

HOW ARE YOU?
>> YOU'RE NOT HARD, ARE YOU,
GENE?

>> YOU'RE NOT HARD, ARE YOU,
GENE?
>> WHERE'S THE APPS GUY.

GENE?
>> WHERE'S THE APPS GUY.
>> WE'RE JUST FINISHING DESSERT

>> WHERE'S THE APPS GUY.
>> WE'RE JUST FINISHING DESSERT
AND WE'RE ABOUT TO HEAD HOME.

>> WE'RE JUST FINISHING DESSERT
AND WE'RE ABOUT TO HEAD HOME.
>> TO BONE, RIGHT?

AND WE'RE ABOUT TO HEAD HOME.
>> TO BONE, RIGHT?
>> AND THE THAT RIGHT, GENE?

>> TO BONE, RIGHT?
>> AND THE THAT RIGHT, GENE?
>> POSSIBLY.

>> AND THE THAT RIGHT, GENE?
>> POSSIBLY.
>> NIBBLES.

>> POSSIBLY.
>> NIBBLES.
NIBBLES NOW.

>> NIBBLES.
NIBBLES NOW.
>> YOU GUYS HEARD OF ONION

NIBBLES NOW.
>> YOU GUYS HEARD OF ONION
RINGS?

>> YOU GUYS HEARD OF ONION
RINGS?
YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE THEM.

RINGS?
YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE THEM.
HOW MUCH ARE THE ONION RINGS?

YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE THEM.
HOW MUCH ARE THE ONION RINGS?
25 CENTS A RING?

HOW MUCH ARE THE ONION RINGS?
25 CENTS A RING?
>> WE DON'T DO IT THAT WAY.

25 CENTS A RING?
>> WE DON'T DO IT THAT WAY.
>> LET'S GET 200.

>> WE DON'T DO IT THAT WAY.
>> LET'S GET 200.
>> GIVE ME 200 ONION RINGS,

>> LET'S GET 200.
>> GIVE ME 200 ONION RINGS,
SPLIT IT FOUR WAYS PAYING, QUIT

>> GIVE ME 200 ONION RINGS,
SPLIT IT FOUR WAYS PAYING, QUIT
CHECKING OUT MY GIRLFRIEND'S

SPLIT IT FOUR WAYS PAYING, QUIT
CHECKING OUT MY GIRLFRIEND'S
RACK.

CHECKING OUT MY GIRLFRIEND'S
RACK.
SHE'S BEING SHY, ISN'T IT GREAT?

RACK.
SHE'S BEING SHY, ISN'T IT GREAT?
SHE'S BEING SHY.

SHE'S BEING SHY, ISN'T IT GREAT?
SHE'S BEING SHY.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME.

SHE'S BEING SHY.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME.
>> MY NAME --

WHAT'S YOUR NAME.
>> MY NAME --
>> NO, NO, NO, NO.

>> MY NAME --
>> NO, NO, NO, NO.
I ASKED HIM.

>> NO, NO, NO, NO.
I ASKED HIM.
>> IF SHE'S SHY.

I ASKED HIM.
>> IF SHE'S SHY.
>> IT'S GOOD TO BE SHY.

>> IF SHE'S SHY.
>> IT'S GOOD TO BE SHY.
>> MY GIRL LIKES YOUR GIRL, THEY

>> IT'S GOOD TO BE SHY.
>> MY GIRL LIKES YOUR GIRL, THEY
SHOULD BE BEST FRIENDS NOW.

>> MY GIRL LIKES YOUR GIRL, THEY
SHOULD BE BEST FRIENDS NOW.
>> DO YOU WANT TO BE BEST

SHOULD BE BEST FRIENDS NOW.
>> DO YOU WANT TO BE BEST
FRIENDS WITH THAT GIRL?

>> DO YOU WANT TO BE BEST
FRIENDS WITH THAT GIRL?
>> I REALLY THINK SO.

FRIENDS WITH THAT GIRL?
>> I REALLY THINK SO.
>> GENE, YOU CRAZY, THAT'S OUR

>> I REALLY THINK SO.
>> GENE, YOU CRAZY, THAT'S OUR
GIRLFRIENDS, THEY'RE BEST

>> GENE, YOU CRAZY, THAT'S OUR
GIRLFRIENDS, THEY'RE BEST
FRIENDS.

GIRLFRIENDS, THEY'RE BEST
FRIENDS.
>> IT'S BEEN GREAT RUNNING INTO

FRIENDS.
>> IT'S BEEN GREAT RUNNING INTO
YOU.

>> IT'S BEEN GREAT RUNNING INTO
YOU.
>> WHOA WHOA WHOA, SHE'S A

YOU.
>> WHOA WHOA WHOA, SHE'S A
SINGER.

>> WHOA WHOA WHOA, SHE'S A
SINGER.
>> I HAVE A SINGER, I HAVE A

SINGER.
>> I HAVE A SINGER, I HAVE A
SONG CALLED BANANA.

>> I HAVE A SINGER, I HAVE A
SONG CALLED BANANA.
>> IT'S A CRAZY HOT SONG.

SONG CALLED BANANA.
>> IT'S A CRAZY HOT SONG.
♪ GOING OUT WITH MY GIRLS

>> IT'S A CRAZY HOT SONG.
♪ GOING OUT WITH MY GIRLS
TONIGHT HAVING FUN WITH MY GIRLS

♪ GOING OUT WITH MY GIRLS
TONIGHT HAVING FUN WITH MY GIRLS
TONIGHT ♪

TONIGHT HAVING FUN WITH MY GIRLS
TONIGHT ♪
♪ BIG BANANA LONG BANANA SHORT

TONIGHT ♪
♪ BIG BANANA LONG BANANA SHORT
BANANA WHITE BANANA ♪

♪ BIG BANANA LONG BANANA SHORT
BANANA WHITE BANANA ♪
♪ FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO,

BANANA WHITE BANANA ♪
♪ FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO,
BANANA ♪

♪ FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO,
BANANA ♪
>> HOW GOOD IS THAT?

BANANA ♪
>> HOW GOOD IS THAT?
IF YOU DON'T HAVE A BONER RIGHT

>> HOW GOOD IS THAT?
IF YOU DON'T HAVE A BONER RIGHT
NOW, YOU SHOULD JUST KILL

IF YOU DON'T HAVE A BONER RIGHT
NOW, YOU SHOULD JUST KILL
YOURSELF.

NOW, YOU SHOULD JUST KILL
YOURSELF.
>> NO, I'M GOOD.

YOURSELF.
>> NO, I'M GOOD.
>> DOES THAT MEAN YOU HAVE ONE?

>> NO, I'M GOOD.
>> DOES THAT MEAN YOU HAVE ONE?
>> HANG ON HERE.

>> DOES THAT MEAN YOU HAVE ONE?
>> HANG ON HERE.
WHO IS THIS GUY LOOKING AT US?

>> HANG ON HERE.
WHO IS THIS GUY LOOKING AT US?
>> I'M YOUR WAITER, REMEMBER?

WHO IS THIS GUY LOOKING AT US?
>> I'M YOUR WAITER, REMEMBER?
YOU JUST ORDERED 200 ONION

>> I'M YOUR WAITER, REMEMBER?
YOU JUST ORDERED 200 ONION
RINGS.

YOU JUST ORDERED 200 ONION
RINGS.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU

RINGS.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU
WANT TO KISS MY GIRLFRIEND RIGHT

>> YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU
WANT TO KISS MY GIRLFRIEND RIGHT
IN FRONT OF ME, LIKE I'M THE

WANT TO KISS MY GIRLFRIEND RIGHT
IN FRONT OF ME, LIKE I'M THE
JOKE OF THE DAY.

IN FRONT OF ME, LIKE I'M THE
JOKE OF THE DAY.
I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU.

JOKE OF THE DAY.
I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU.
COME HERE.

I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU.
COME HERE.
>> IS THIS AN ONION RING?

COME HERE.
>> IS THIS AN ONION RING?
I DON'T WANT THIS, I CAN'T HAVE

>> IS THIS AN ONION RING?
I DON'T WANT THIS, I CAN'T HAVE
ONION.

I DON'T WANT THIS, I CAN'T HAVE
ONION.
>> NOW WHAT?

ONION.
>> NOW WHAT?
>> LET'S GIVE THEM TO HER.

>> NOW WHAT?
>> LET'S GIVE THEM TO HER.
>> SHE'LL EAT THEM.

>> LET'S GIVE THEM TO HER.
>> SHE'LL EAT THEM.
>> YEAH, WE'LL JUST ALL HANG OUT

>> SHE'LL EAT THEM.
>> YEAH, WE'LL JUST ALL HANG OUT
WHILE SHE EATS THESE ONION

>> YEAH, WE'LL JUST ALL HANG OUT
WHILE SHE EATS THESE ONION
RINGS.

WHILE SHE EATS THESE ONION
RINGS.
AND WHEN SHE'S DONE, WE'LL ALL

RINGS.
AND WHEN SHE'S DONE, WE'LL ALL
LEAVE.

AND WHEN SHE'S DONE, WE'LL ALL
LEAVE.
>> EAT 'EM, EAT 'EM UP.

LEAVE.
>> EAT 'EM, EAT 'EM UP.
>> ONE, TWO.

>> EAT 'EM, EAT 'EM UP.
>> ONE, TWO.
>> COME ON.

>> ONE, TWO.
>> COME ON.
♪

>> COME ON.
♪
>>> YOU'RE WATCHING TNT MOVIES.

♪
>>> YOU'RE WATCHING TNT MOVIES.
NOW BACK TO THE 1983 CLASSIC,

>>> YOU'RE WATCHING TNT MOVIES.
NOW BACK TO THE 1983 CLASSIC,
"ESCAPE FROM JUNGLE ISLAND."

NOW BACK TO THE 1983 CLASSIC,
"ESCAPE FROM JUNGLE ISLAND."
>> DR. BONES DR. BONES, LOOK,

"ESCAPE FROM JUNGLE ISLAND."
>> DR. BONES DR. BONES, LOOK,
THE FORBIDDEN TEMPLE OF LOST

>> DR. BONES DR. BONES, LOOK,
THE FORBIDDEN TEMPLE OF LOST
SOULS.

THE FORBIDDEN TEMPLE OF LOST
SOULS.
>> EXCELLENT WORK, SHORT LONG.

SOULS.
>> EXCELLENT WORK, SHORT LONG.
AND YOU ARE AN EXCELLENT

>> EXCELLENT WORK, SHORT LONG.
AND YOU ARE AN EXCELLENT
TRANSLATOR MRS. REESE.

AND YOU ARE AN EXCELLENT
TRANSLATOR MRS. REESE.
>> ACTUALLY, IT'S MISS REESE,

TRANSLATOR MRS. REESE.
>> ACTUALLY, IT'S MISS REESE,
DR. BONES.

>> ACTUALLY, IT'S MISS REESE,
DR. BONES.
I HOPE WE SHARE MANY MORE

DR. BONES.
I HOPE WE SHARE MANY MORE
ADVENTURES TOGETHER.

I HOPE WE SHARE MANY MORE
ADVENTURES TOGETHER.
>> WELL, LET'S KEEP IT

ADVENTURES TOGETHER.
>> WELL, LET'S KEEP IT
PROFESSIONAL MISS REESE.

>> WELL, LET'S KEEP IT
PROFESSIONAL MISS REESE.
WE HAVE TO RETRIEVE THE

PROFESSIONAL MISS REESE.
WE HAVE TO RETRIEVE THE
PRICELESS YULU-YULU CRYSTAL AND

WE HAVE TO RETRIEVE THE
PRICELESS YULU-YULU CRYSTAL AND
GET OFF THE JUNGLE.

PRICELESS YULU-YULU CRYSTAL AND
GET OFF THE JUNGLE.
OKAY, SO THERE HAS TO BE A LEVER

GET OFF THE JUNGLE.
OKAY, SO THERE HAS TO BE A LEVER
AROUND HERE, THERE'S ALWAYS A

OKAY, SO THERE HAS TO BE A LEVER
AROUND HERE, THERE'S ALWAYS A
LEVER.

AROUND HERE, THERE'S ALWAYS A
LEVER.
>> OOMBA, OOMBA, OOMBA, OOMBA!

LEVER.
>> OOMBA, OOMBA, OOMBA, OOMBA!
[ SCREAMING ]

>> OOMBA, OOMBA, OOMBA, OOMBA!
[ SCREAMING ]
>> DR. BONES, DR. BONES, I'VE

[ SCREAMING ]
>> DR. BONES, DR. BONES, I'VE
BEEN HIT BY A POISONOUS DART.

>> DR. BONES, DR. BONES, I'VE
BEEN HIT BY A POISONOUS DART.
>> SHORT LONG NO.

BEEN HIT BY A POISONOUS DART.
>> SHORT LONG NO.
>> THIS IS THE END OF THE LINE

>> SHORT LONG NO.
>> THIS IS THE END OF THE LINE
FOR ME, DR. BONES, I'M A GONER.

>> THIS IS THE END OF THE LINE
FOR ME, DR. BONES, I'M A GONER.
>> SHORT TALL, NO YOU STILL HAVE

FOR ME, DR. BONES, I'M A GONER.
>> SHORT TALL, NO YOU STILL HAVE
A CHANCE.

>> SHORT TALL, NO YOU STILL HAVE
A CHANCE.
I'LL SUCK THE POISON OUT.

A CHANCE.
I'LL SUCK THE POISON OUT.
[ LAUGHTER ]

I'LL SUCK THE POISON OUT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OH SWEET KISSES.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OH SWEET KISSES.
>> AW, THERE.

>> OH SWEET KISSES.
>> AW, THERE.
FEEL BETTER SHORT LONG?

>> AW, THERE.
FEEL BETTER SHORT LONG?
>> DR. BONES, YOU SAVED MY LIFE.

FEEL BETTER SHORT LONG?
>> DR. BONES, YOU SAVED MY LIFE.
>> WELL, YOU KNOW, I'D DO THE

>> DR. BONES, YOU SAVED MY LIFE.
>> WELL, YOU KNOW, I'D DO THE
SAME FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS.

>> WELL, YOU KNOW, I'D DO THE
SAME FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS.
>> REALLY?

SAME FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS.
>> REALLY?
REALLY?

>> REALLY?
REALLY?
OH, NO.

REALLY?
OH, NO.
[ LAUGHTER ]

OH, NO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I'M HIT TOO, I'M HIT RIGHT ON MY

[ LAUGHTER ]
I'M HIT TOO, I'M HIT RIGHT ON MY
SOFT LIPS.

I'M HIT TOO, I'M HIT RIGHT ON MY
SOFT LIPS.
YOU BOTH HEARD IT.

SOFT LIPS.
YOU BOTH HEARD IT.
[ LAUGHTER ]

YOU BOTH HEARD IT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I DON'T SEE A DART

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I DON'T SEE A DART
MISS REESE.

>> I DON'T SEE A DART
MISS REESE.
>> YEAH BUT YOU'RE JUST A GUIDE,

MISS REESE.
>> YEAH BUT YOU'RE JUST A GUIDE,
MAYBE DR. BONES SHOULD LOOK.

>> YEAH BUT YOU'RE JUST A GUIDE,
MAYBE DR. BONES SHOULD LOOK.
>> IT WAS PROBABLY JUST A

MAYBE DR. BONES SHOULD LOOK.
>> IT WAS PROBABLY JUST A
MOSQUITO.

>> IT WAS PROBABLY JUST A
MOSQUITO.
>> BALI, BALI, BALI, BALI!

MOSQUITO.
>> BALI, BALI, BALI, BALI!
[ SCREAMING ]

>> BALI, BALI, BALI, BALI!
[ SCREAMING ]
>> I'M HIT.

[ SCREAMING ]
>> I'M HIT.
I'M HIT RIGHT IN THE CHEST.

>> I'M HIT.
I'M HIT RIGHT IN THE CHEST.
>> I'LL SUCK IT OUT, ME.

I'M HIT RIGHT IN THE CHEST.
>> I'LL SUCK IT OUT, ME.
>> NO, NO, NO!

>> I'LL SUCK IT OUT, ME.
>> NO, NO, NO!
>> I'M HIT.

>> NO, NO, NO!
>> I'M HIT.
I'M HIT.

>> I'M HIT.
I'M HIT.
RIGHT IN THE CHEST.

I'M HIT.
RIGHT IN THE CHEST.
>> DR. BONES SAVED MY LIFE, NOW

RIGHT IN THE CHEST.
>> DR. BONES SAVED MY LIFE, NOW
I MUST RETURN THE FAVOR THAT'S

>> DR. BONES SAVED MY LIFE, NOW
I MUST RETURN THE FAVOR THAT'S
GUY CODE.

I MUST RETURN THE FAVOR THAT'S
GUY CODE.
>> NO, BUT I CALLED IT.

GUY CODE.
>> NO, BUT I CALLED IT.
>> SHORT TALL, DO YOU SEE THE

>> NO, BUT I CALLED IT.
>> SHORT TALL, DO YOU SEE THE
WOUND?

>> SHORT TALL, DO YOU SEE THE
WOUND?
>> NOT YET.

WOUND?
>> NOT YET.
>> HOW ABOUT NOW?

>> NOT YET.
>> HOW ABOUT NOW?
>> NOT YET.

>> HOW ABOUT NOW?
>> NOT YET.
>> HOW ABOUT NOW?

>> NOT YET.
>> HOW ABOUT NOW?
>> OH YEAH, IT HIT YOU RIGHT ON

>> HOW ABOUT NOW?
>> OH YEAH, IT HIT YOU RIGHT ON
THE NIPPLE.

>> OH YEAH, IT HIT YOU RIGHT ON
THE NIPPLE.
[ LAUGHTER ]

THE NIPPLE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NO!

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NO!
>> QUICK, QUICK, GET THE POISON

>> NO!
>> QUICK, QUICK, GET THE POISON
OUT USING YOUR MOUTH SHORT TALL.

>> QUICK, QUICK, GET THE POISON
OUT USING YOUR MOUTH SHORT TALL.
>> GOOD IDEA.

OUT USING YOUR MOUTH SHORT TALL.
>> GOOD IDEA.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> GOOD IDEA.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WAIT, WAIT.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WAIT, WAIT.
WHAT IF YOU BLOW INTO THAT

>> WAIT, WAIT.
WHAT IF YOU BLOW INTO THAT
NIPPLE WHILE I SUCK ON THE OTHER

WHAT IF YOU BLOW INTO THAT
NIPPLE WHILE I SUCK ON THE OTHER
ONE.

NIPPLE WHILE I SUCK ON THE OTHER
ONE.
WILL THAT WORK?

ONE.
WILL THAT WORK?
CAN WE TRY THAT, PLEASE?

WILL THAT WORK?
CAN WE TRY THAT, PLEASE?
>> I'M ALREADY DONE.

CAN WE TRY THAT, PLEASE?
>> I'M ALREADY DONE.
>> SHORT LONG YOU ARE A TRUE

>> I'M ALREADY DONE.
>> SHORT LONG YOU ARE A TRUE
FRIEND.

>> SHORT LONG YOU ARE A TRUE
FRIEND.
>> ARE YOU SURE YOU GOT ALL THE

FRIEND.
>> ARE YOU SURE YOU GOT ALL THE
POISON?

>> ARE YOU SURE YOU GOT ALL THE
POISON?
SOMEONE SHOULD CHECK TO MAKE

POISON?
SOMEONE SHOULD CHECK TO MAKE
SURE.

SOMEONE SHOULD CHECK TO MAKE
SURE.
>> GOOD IDEA MISS REESE.

SURE.
>> GOOD IDEA MISS REESE.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> GOOD IDEA MISS REESE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ LAUGHTER ]

[ LAUGHTER ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YEAH, I GOT IT ALL.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YEAH, I GOT IT ALL.
>> ALL RIGHT.

>> YEAH, I GOT IT ALL.
>> ALL RIGHT.
NOW LET'S GET THIS DOOR OPEN AND

>> ALL RIGHT.
NOW LET'S GET THIS DOOR OPEN AND
RETRIEVE THAT CRYSTAL.

NOW LET'S GET THIS DOOR OPEN AND
RETRIEVE THAT CRYSTAL.
>> FITY, FITY, FITY, FITY, FEE!

RETRIEVE THAT CRYSTAL.
>> FITY, FITY, FITY, FITY, FEE!
[ SCREAMING ]

>> FITY, FITY, FITY, FITY, FEE!
[ SCREAMING ]
[ LAUGHTER ]

[ SCREAMING ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HE HIT ME IN THE REAR.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HE HIT ME IN THE REAR.
>> DIBS, I GOT DIBS.

>> HE HIT ME IN THE REAR.
>> DIBS, I GOT DIBS.
>> NO, NO, MISS REID, I'M CLOSER

>> DIBS, I GOT DIBS.
>> NO, NO, MISS REID, I'M CLOSER
TO DR. BONES, BY THE TIME YOU

>> NO, NO, MISS REID, I'M CLOSER
TO DR. BONES, BY THE TIME YOU
GET OVER HERE, THE POISON WILL

TO DR. BONES, BY THE TIME YOU
GET OVER HERE, THE POISON WILL
ENTER INTO HIS BLOOD STREAM.

GET OVER HERE, THE POISON WILL
ENTER INTO HIS BLOOD STREAM.
>> HE'S RIGHT MISS REESE I

ENTER INTO HIS BLOOD STREAM.
>> HE'S RIGHT MISS REESE I
APPRECIATE YOU TRYING TO HELP

>> HE'S RIGHT MISS REESE I
APPRECIATE YOU TRYING TO HELP
BUT IT HAS TO BE SHORT TALL.

APPRECIATE YOU TRYING TO HELP
BUT IT HAS TO BE SHORT TALL.
HE'S SLIGHTLY CLOSER AND TIME IS

BUT IT HAS TO BE SHORT TALL.
HE'S SLIGHTLY CLOSER AND TIME IS
OF THE ESSENCE.

HE'S SLIGHTLY CLOSER AND TIME IS
OF THE ESSENCE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

OF THE ESSENCE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> I CAN HOLD HIS BUTT FIRMLY

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> I CAN HOLD HIS BUTT FIRMLY
FOR YOU, YOU KNOW, SO YOU CAN

>> I CAN HOLD HIS BUTT FIRMLY
FOR YOU, YOU KNOW, SO YOU CAN
FOCUS ON GETTING THE POISON OUT.

FOR YOU, YOU KNOW, SO YOU CAN
FOCUS ON GETTING THE POISON OUT.
>> OH, THERE'S SO MUCH POISON,

FOCUS ON GETTING THE POISON OUT.
>> OH, THERE'S SO MUCH POISON,
DR. BONES!

>> OH, THERE'S SO MUCH POISON,
DR. BONES!
>> DON'T STOP SUCKING SHORT LONG

DR. BONES!
>> DON'T STOP SUCKING SHORT LONG
UNTIL YOU'VE GOTTEN IT ALL OUT.

>> DON'T STOP SUCKING SHORT LONG
UNTIL YOU'VE GOTTEN IT ALL OUT.
[ LAUGHTER ]

UNTIL YOU'VE GOTTEN IT ALL OUT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WE COULD TAKE SHIFTS.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WE COULD TAKE SHIFTS.
I'LL GO NOW AND YOU GO WHEN I'M

>> WE COULD TAKE SHIFTS.
I'LL GO NOW AND YOU GO WHEN I'M
DONE TOMORROW.

I'LL GO NOW AND YOU GO WHEN I'M
DONE TOMORROW.
[ LAUGHTER ]

DONE TOMORROW.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> ALREADY DONE.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> ALREADY DONE.
BOY IT WAS HARD TO GET A GOOD

>> ALREADY DONE.
BOY IT WAS HARD TO GET A GOOD
SEAL BECAUSE THE SKIN IS SO

BOY IT WAS HARD TO GET A GOOD
SEAL BECAUSE THE SKIN IS SO
TIGHT.

SEAL BECAUSE THE SKIN IS SO
TIGHT.
>> WHY.

TIGHT.
>> WHY.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> WHY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I OWE YOU ONE SHORT TALL.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I OWE YOU ONE SHORT TALL.
>> DALI, DALI, DALI, DALI!

>> I OWE YOU ONE SHORT TALL.
>> DALI, DALI, DALI, DALI!
>> WAIT, WAIT!

>> DALI, DALI, DALI, DALI!
>> WAIT, WAIT!
AIM OVER HERE, AND I'LL MAKE YOU

>> WAIT, WAIT!
AIM OVER HERE, AND I'LL MAKE YOU
A VERY RICH WOMAN.

AIM OVER HERE, AND I'LL MAKE YOU
A VERY RICH WOMAN.
[ SCREAMING ]

A VERY RICH WOMAN.
[ SCREAMING ]
[ LAUGHTER ]

[ SCREAMING ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WE BOTH WERE SHOT RIGHT

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WE BOTH WERE SHOT RIGHT
BETWEEN THE LEGS.

>> WE BOTH WERE SHOT RIGHT
BETWEEN THE LEGS.
>> AND IT ALL FALLS ON ME,

BETWEEN THE LEGS.
>> AND IT ALL FALLS ON ME,
BECAUSE ONLY ONE CAN BE SAVED.

>> AND IT ALL FALLS ON ME,
BECAUSE ONLY ONE CAN BE SAVED.
FAREWELL BRAVE SHORT TALL.

BECAUSE ONLY ONE CAN BE SAVED.
FAREWELL BRAVE SHORT TALL.
>> NO, NO, NO, WE CAN SAVE EACH

FAREWELL BRAVE SHORT TALL.
>> NO, NO, NO, WE CAN SAVE EACH
OTHER SHORT LONG, QUICK.

>> NO, NO, NO, WE CAN SAVE EACH
OTHER SHORT LONG, QUICK.
CARTWHEEL UP TO ME.

OTHER SHORT LONG, QUICK.
CARTWHEEL UP TO ME.
[ LAUGHTER ]

CARTWHEEL UP TO ME.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I WANT TO BE IN THERE.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I WANT TO BE IN THERE.
LET ME IN, PLEASE.

>> I WANT TO BE IN THERE.
LET ME IN, PLEASE.
>> WE'LL BE WITH YOU IN

LET ME IN, PLEASE.
>> WE'LL BE WITH YOU IN
15 MINUTES.

>> WE'LL BE WITH YOU IN
15 MINUTES.
>> I WANT TO BE IN THERE.

15 MINUTES.
>> I WANT TO BE IN THERE.
NO, DR. BONES.

>> I WANT TO BE IN THERE.
NO, DR. BONES.
DR. BONES.

NO, DR. BONES.
DR. BONES.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

DR. BONES.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪
>>> ABRAMS, YOU'RE UP.

♪
>>> ABRAMS, YOU'RE UP.
KEG STAND.

>>> ABRAMS, YOU'RE UP.
KEG STAND.
>> OH, YEAH.

KEG STAND.
>> OH, YEAH.
>> DRINK, DRINK, DRINK, DRINK,

>> OH, YEAH.
>> DRINK, DRINK, DRINK, DRINK,
DRINK, DRINK, DRINK, DRINK.

>> DRINK, DRINK, DRINK, DRINK,
DRINK, DRINK, DRINK, DRINK.
>> WHOA!

DRINK, DRINK, DRINK, DRINK.
>> WHOA!
WHOA!

>> WHOA!
WHOA!
>> WHAT?

WHOA!
>> WHAT?
>> ARE YOU BALD?

>> WHAT?
>> ARE YOU BALD?
>> NO.

>> ARE YOU BALD?
>> NO.
♪

>> NO.
♪
>> HEY.

♪
>> HEY.
SORRY ABOUT BACK THERE.

>> HEY.
SORRY ABOUT BACK THERE.
IT JUST SUCKS, NO ONE WANTS TO

SORRY ABOUT BACK THERE.
IT JUST SUCKS, NO ONE WANTS TO
BE THE BALD GUY IN THE FRAT.

IT JUST SUCKS, NO ONE WANTS TO
BE THE BALD GUY IN THE FRAT.
>> I KNOW.

BE THE BALD GUY IN THE FRAT.
>> I KNOW.
THAT'S WHY I USE THIS, BROGAINE.

>> I KNOW.
THAT'S WHY I USE THIS, BROGAINE.
>> YOU KNOW, I WAS LIKE YOU

THAT'S WHY I USE THIS, BROGAINE.
>> YOU KNOW, I WAS LIKE YOU
ONCE.

>> YOU KNOW, I WAS LIKE YOU
ONCE.
I FELT LIKE A CREEP AROUND

ONCE.
I FELT LIKE A CREEP AROUND
CAMPUS.

I FELT LIKE A CREEP AROUND
CAMPUS.
I COULDN'T EVEN GET ANYONE TO

CAMPUS.
I COULDN'T EVEN GET ANYONE TO
CHECK MY FAKE I.D.

I COULDN'T EVEN GET ANYONE TO
CHECK MY FAKE I.D.
>> THAT'S NOT NECESSARY, SIR.

CHECK MY FAKE I.D.
>> THAT'S NOT NECESSARY, SIR.
>> YOUNG MAN, HAVE YOUR I.D. OUT

>> THAT'S NOT NECESSARY, SIR.
>> YOUNG MAN, HAVE YOUR I.D. OUT
AND READY.

>> YOUNG MAN, HAVE YOUR I.D. OUT
AND READY.
>> THAT'S WHEN THE DOCTOR TOLD

AND READY.
>> THAT'S WHEN THE DOCTOR TOLD
ME ABOUT BROGAINE.

>> THAT'S WHEN THE DOCTOR TOLD
ME ABOUT BROGAINE.
HE EXPLAINED PREMATURE BALDING

ME ABOUT BROGAINE.
HE EXPLAINED PREMATURE BALDING
CAN BE CAUSED BY STRESS, BROUGHT

HE EXPLAINED PREMATURE BALDING
CAN BE CAUSED BY STRESS, BROUGHT
ON BY THINGS LIKE MIDTERMS,

CAN BE CAUSED BY STRESS, BROUGHT
ON BY THINGS LIKE MIDTERMS,
NERDS, THINK YOUR FRAT DOG MAY

ON BY THINGS LIKE MIDTERMS,
NERDS, THINK YOUR FRAT DOG MAY
BE AN ALCOHOLIC.

NERDS, THINK YOUR FRAT DOG MAY
BE AN ALCOHOLIC.
AND YOU CHANTED THE N WORD IN A

BE AN ALCOHOLIC.
AND YOU CHANTED THE N WORD IN A
VIRAL VIDEO.

AND YOU CHANTED THE N WORD IN A
VIRAL VIDEO.
BROGAINE FIGHTS HAIR LOSS BY

VIRAL VIDEO.
BROGAINE FIGHTS HAIR LOSS BY
COMBINING MONOXIDIL, CREOTINE.

BROGAINE FIGHTS HAIR LOSS BY
COMBINING MONOXIDIL, CREOTINE.
>> SO IT DOES WORK?

COMBINING MONOXIDIL, CREOTINE.
>> SO IT DOES WORK?
>> IT WORKED FOR ME.

>> SO IT DOES WORK?
>> IT WORKED FOR ME.
>> DOCTOR?

>> IT WORKED FOR ME.
>> DOCTOR?
>> ARE WE DOING THIS?

>> DOCTOR?
>> ARE WE DOING THIS?
>> HE'S NICE.

>> ARE WE DOING THIS?
>> HE'S NICE.
>> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

>> HE'S NICE.
>> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
GEORGE EZRA.

>> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
GEORGE EZRA.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

GEORGE EZRA.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪
♪ MY HOUSE IN BUDAPEST

♪
♪ MY HOUSE IN BUDAPEST
MY MY HIDDEN TREASURE CHEST

♪ MY HOUSE IN BUDAPEST
MY MY HIDDEN TREASURE CHEST
GOLDEN GRAND PIANO

MY MY HIDDEN TREASURE CHEST
GOLDEN GRAND PIANO
MY BEAUTIFUL CASTILLO M

GOLDEN GRAND PIANO
MY BEAUTIFUL CASTILLO M
♪ YOU OOH YOU

MY BEAUTIFUL CASTILLO M
♪ YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪

♪ YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
♪ MY ACRES OF A LAND

OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
♪ MY ACRES OF A LAND
THAT I'VE ACHIEVED

♪ MY ACRES OF A LAND
THAT I'VE ACHIEVED
IT MAY BE HARD FOR YOU TO

THAT I'VE ACHIEVED
IT MAY BE HARD FOR YOU TO
STOP AND BELIEVE ♪

IT MAY BE HARD FOR YOU TO
STOP AND BELIEVE ♪
♪ BUT FOR YOU OOH YOU

STOP AND BELIEVE ♪
♪ BUT FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL

♪ BUT FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL
OOH FOR YOU OOH YOU

OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL
OOH FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪

OOH FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
♪ AND GIVE ME

OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
♪ AND GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON

♪ AND GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER

ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪

WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME

MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS

♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪

THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ MY MANY ARTIFACTS

WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ MY MANY ARTIFACTS
THE LIST GOES ON

♪ MY MANY ARTIFACTS
THE LIST GOES ON
IF YOU JUST SAY THE WORDS

THE LIST GOES ON
IF YOU JUST SAY THE WORDS
I I'LL UP AND RUN ♪

IF YOU JUST SAY THE WORDS
I I'LL UP AND RUN ♪
♪ OH TO YOU OOH YOU

I I'LL UP AND RUN ♪
♪ OH TO YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL

♪ OH TO YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL
OH TO YOU OOH OH

OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL
OH TO YOU OOH OH
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪

OH TO YOU OOH OH
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
♪ AND GIVE ME

OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
♪ AND GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON

♪ AND GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER

ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪

WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME

MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS

♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪

THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ GIVE ME ONE

WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ GIVE ME ONE
GOOD REASON

♪ GIVE ME ONE
GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER

GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪

WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME

MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS

♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪

THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪

WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪
♪ MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY

♪
♪ MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY
THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND

♪ MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY
THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND
THEY FEAR THEY'D LOSE SO MUCH

THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND
THEY FEAR THEY'D LOSE SO MUCH
IF YOU TAKE MY HAND ♪

THEY FEAR THEY'D LOSE SO MUCH
IF YOU TAKE MY HAND ♪
♪ BUT FOR YOU OOH YOU

IF YOU TAKE MY HAND ♪
♪ BUT FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LOSE IT ALL

♪ BUT FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LOSE IT ALL
OH FOR YOU OOH YOU

OOH I'D LOSE IT ALL
OH FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LOSE IT ALL ♪

OH FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LOSE IT ALL ♪
♪ AND GIVE ME

OOH I'D LOSE IT ALL ♪
♪ AND GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON

♪ AND GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER

ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪

WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME

MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS

♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪

THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ GIVE ME

WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON

♪ GIVE ME
ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER

ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪

WHY I SHOULD NEVER
MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME

MAKE A CHANGE ♪
♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS

♪ BABY IF YOU HOLD ME
THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪

THEN ALL OF THIS
WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ MY HOUSE IN BUDAPEST

WILL GO AWAY ♪
♪ MY HOUSE IN BUDAPEST
MY MY HIDDEN TREASURE CHEST

♪ MY HOUSE IN BUDAPEST
MY MY HIDDEN TREASURE CHEST
GOLDEN GRAND PIANO

MY MY HIDDEN TREASURE CHEST
GOLDEN GRAND PIANO
MY BEAUTIFUL CASTILLO ♪

GOLDEN GRAND PIANO
MY BEAUTIFUL CASTILLO ♪
♪ YOU OOH YOU

MY BEAUTIFUL CASTILLO ♪
♪ YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL

♪ YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL
OH, FOR YOU OOH YOU

OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL
OH, FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪

OH, FOR YOU OOH YOU
OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

OOH I'D LEAVE IT ALL ♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Announcer: IT'S WEEKEND

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Announcer: IT'S WEEKEND
UPDATE WITH COLIN JOST AND

>> Announcer: IT'S WEEKEND
UPDATE WITH COLIN JOST AND
MICHAEL CHE.

UPDATE WITH COLIN JOST AND
MICHAEL CHE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

MICHAEL CHE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> WHAT'S UP, EVERYBODY.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> WHAT'S UP, EVERYBODY.
>> WELCOME TO WEEKEND UPDATE,

>> WHAT'S UP, EVERYBODY.
>> WELCOME TO WEEKEND UPDATE,
I'M MICHAEL CHE.

>> WELCOME TO WEEKEND UPDATE,
I'M MICHAEL CHE.
>> I'M COLIN JOST.

I'M MICHAEL CHE.
>> I'M COLIN JOST.
AND HERE ARE TONIGHT'S TOP

>> I'M COLIN JOST.
AND HERE ARE TONIGHT'S TOP
STORIES.

AND HERE ARE TONIGHT'S TOP
STORIES.
>>> THE GOVERNOR OF INDIANA HAS

STORIES.
>>> THE GOVERNOR OF INDIANA HAS
SIGNED A NEW LAW ALLOWING

>>> THE GOVERNOR OF INDIANA HAS
SIGNED A NEW LAW ALLOWING
BUSINESSES TO TURN AWAY GAY AND

SIGNED A NEW LAW ALLOWING
BUSINESSES TO TURN AWAY GAY AND
LESBIAN COUPLES, SAYING IT'S

BUSINESSES TO TURN AWAY GAY AND
LESBIAN COUPLES, SAYING IT'S
PART OF THEIR RELIGIOUS FREEDOM.

LESBIAN COUPLES, SAYING IT'S
PART OF THEIR RELIGIOUS FREEDOM.
YOU'LL BE ABLE TO TELL WHICH

PART OF THEIR RELIGIOUS FREEDOM.
YOU'LL BE ABLE TO TELL WHICH
STORES ARE SUPPORTING THE NEW

YOU'LL BE ABLE TO TELL WHICH
STORES ARE SUPPORTING THE NEW
LAW, BECAUSE THEY'LL HAVE THESE

STORES ARE SUPPORTING THE NEW
LAW, BECAUSE THEY'LL HAVE THESE
HELPFUL LITTLE SIGNS.

LAW, BECAUSE THEY'LL HAVE THESE
HELPFUL LITTLE SIGNS.
[ LAUGHTER ]

HELPFUL LITTLE SIGNS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

[ LAUGHTER ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> THE HEAD OF THE HOUSE

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> THE HEAD OF THE HOUSE
COMMITTEE INVESTIGATING THE

>>> THE HEAD OF THE HOUSE
COMMITTEE INVESTIGATING THE
BENGHAZI ATTACK SAID FRIDAY THAT

COMMITTEE INVESTIGATING THE
BENGHAZI ATTACK SAID FRIDAY THAT
HILLARY CLINTON WIPED HER

BENGHAZI ATTACK SAID FRIDAY THAT
HILLARY CLINTON WIPED HER
PERSONAL E-MAIL SERVER CLEAN,

HILLARY CLINTON WIPED HER
PERSONAL E-MAIL SERVER CLEAN,
PERMANENTLY DELETING ALL HER

PERSONAL E-MAIL SERVER CLEAN,
PERMANENTLY DELETING ALL HER
E-MAILS.

PERMANENTLY DELETING ALL HER
E-MAILS.
SO AT LEAST ONE CLINTON HAS

E-MAILS.
SO AT LEAST ONE CLINTON HAS
LEARNED HOW TO WIPE SOMETHING

SO AT LEAST ONE CLINTON HAS
LEARNED HOW TO WIPE SOMETHING
CLEAN.

LEARNED HOW TO WIPE SOMETHING
CLEAN.
[ LAUGHTER ]

CLEAN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> A NEW JUSTICE DEPARTMENT

[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> A NEW JUSTICE DEPARTMENT
REPORT CLAIMS THAT AMERICAN DEA

>>> A NEW JUSTICE DEPARTMENT
REPORT CLAIMS THAT AMERICAN DEA
AGENTS IN COLOMBIA PARTICIPATED

REPORT CLAIMS THAT AMERICAN DEA
AGENTS IN COLOMBIA PARTICIPATED
IN SEX PARTIES WITH PROSTITUTES

AGENTS IN COLOMBIA PARTICIPATED
IN SEX PARTIES WITH PROSTITUTES
HIRED BY DRUG CARTELS.

IN SEX PARTIES WITH PROSTITUTES
HIRED BY DRUG CARTELS.
IN RESPONSE TO THIS INCREDIBLY

HIRED BY DRUG CARTELS.
IN RESPONSE TO THIS INCREDIBLY
IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOR, THE

IN RESPONSE TO THIS INCREDIBLY
IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOR, THE
AGENTS HAVE BEEN PROMOTED TO

IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOR, THE
AGENTS HAVE BEEN PROMOTED TO
SECRET SERVICE.

AGENTS HAVE BEEN PROMOTED TO
SECRET SERVICE.
[ LAUGHTER ]

SECRET SERVICE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> TED CRUZ ASKED VOTERS TO

[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> TED CRUZ ASKED VOTERS TO
IMAGINE THE COUNTRY WHAT IT

>>> TED CRUZ ASKED VOTERS TO
IMAGINE THE COUNTRY WHAT IT
WOULD LOOK LIKE WITH HIM AS THE

IMAGINE THE COUNTRY WHAT IT
WOULD LOOK LIKE WITH HIM AS THE
LEADER.

WOULD LOOK LIKE WITH HIM AS THE
LEADER.
AND THEN HE REPEATEDLY ASKED

LEADER.
AND THEN HE REPEATEDLY ASKED
VOUTERS TO STOP LAUGHING.

AND THEN HE REPEATEDLY ASKED
VOUTERS TO STOP LAUGHING.
HE WAS SERIOUS.

VOUTERS TO STOP LAUGHING.
HE WAS SERIOUS.
HE COULD WIN.

HE WAS SERIOUS.
HE COULD WIN.
>>> FRIDAY, SENATOR HARRY REID

HE COULD WIN.
>>> FRIDAY, SENATOR HARRY REID
SAID HE CAME TO HIS DECISION TO

>>> FRIDAY, SENATOR HARRY REID
SAID HE CAME TO HIS DECISION TO
NOT RUN FOR RE-ELECTION WHILE HE

SAID HE CAME TO HIS DECISION TO
NOT RUN FOR RE-ELECTION WHILE HE
WAS RECOVERING FROM AN

NOT RUN FOR RE-ELECTION WHILE HE
WAS RECOVERING FROM AN
EXERCISING ACCIDENT.

WAS RECOVERING FROM AN
EXERCISING ACCIDENT.
THAT'S RIGHT, AN EXERCISING

EXERCISING ACCIDENT.
THAT'S RIGHT, AN EXERCISING
ACCIDENT.

THAT'S RIGHT, AN EXERCISING
ACCIDENT.
AND KEV KNITLY NOT ROUGHED UP BY

ACCIDENT.
AND KEV KNITLY NOT ROUGHED UP BY
MITCH McCONNELL.

AND KEV KNITLY NOT ROUGHED UP BY
MITCH McCONNELL.
[ LAUGHTER ]

MITCH McCONNELL.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> THE RUSSIAN RUBEL SHOWED

[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> THE RUSSIAN RUBEL SHOWED
SOME GROWTH THIS WEEK.

>>> THE RUSSIAN RUBEL SHOWED
SOME GROWTH THIS WEEK.
HERE TO COMMENT IS

SOME GROWTH THIS WEEK.
HERE TO COMMENT IS
OLYA POVLAVSKY.

HERE TO COMMENT IS
OLYA POVLAVSKY.
>> HELLO, MY NAME IS WHAT?

OLYA POVLAVSKY.
>> HELLO, MY NAME IS WHAT?
MY NAME IS WHO?

>> HELLO, MY NAME IS WHAT?
MY NAME IS WHO?
MY NAME IS OLYA, OLYA I'M

MY NAME IS WHO?
MY NAME IS OLYA, OLYA I'M
STARVING.

MY NAME IS OLYA, OLYA I'M
STARVING.
[ LAUGHTER ]

STARVING.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OLYA, SO GLAD TO HAVE YOU

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OLYA, SO GLAD TO HAVE YOU
BACK.

>> OLYA, SO GLAD TO HAVE YOU
BACK.
>> IT'S MY PLEASURE.

BACK.
>> IT'S MY PLEASURE.
YOU KNOW, EVER SINCE I HAVE BEEN

>> IT'S MY PLEASURE.
YOU KNOW, EVER SINCE I HAVE BEEN
ON THIS SNL, I'M LOCAL CELEBRITY

YOU KNOW, EVER SINCE I HAVE BEEN
ON THIS SNL, I'M LOCAL CELEBRITY
IN MY VILLAGE.

ON THIS SNL, I'M LOCAL CELEBRITY
IN MY VILLAGE.
EVERYWHERE I GO, I'M HOUNDED.

IN MY VILLAGE.
EVERYWHERE I GO, I'M HOUNDED.
>> YOU'RE HANDED LIKE

EVERYWHERE I GO, I'M HOUNDED.
>> YOU'RE HANDED LIKE
CELEBRITIES?

>> YOU'RE HANDED LIKE
CELEBRITIES?
>> NO, BY HOUNDS.

CELEBRITIES?
>> NO, BY HOUNDS.
I TRICK THEM LIKE THIS.

>> NO, BY HOUNDS.
I TRICK THEM LIKE THIS.
>> YOU WOULD BE HAPPY TO BE

I TRICK THEM LIKE THIS.
>> YOU WOULD BE HAPPY TO BE
DEAD?

>> YOU WOULD BE HAPPY TO BE
DEAD?
>> YES, LIKE ALL RUSSIANS, I

DEAD?
>> YES, LIKE ALL RUSSIANS, I
HAVE BEEN PLANNING MY FUNERAL

>> YES, LIKE ALL RUSSIANS, I
HAVE BEEN PLANNING MY FUNERAL
SINCE I WAS A LITTLE GIRL.

HAVE BEEN PLANNING MY FUNERAL
SINCE I WAS A LITTLE GIRL.
AS I AM BURIED I WILL HAVE THEM

SINCE I WAS A LITTLE GIRL.
AS I AM BURIED I WILL HAVE THEM
PLAY THE MOST POPULAR FUNERAL

AS I AM BURIED I WILL HAVE THEM
PLAY THE MOST POPULAR FUNERAL
SONG IN RUSSIA.

PLAY THE MOST POPULAR FUNERAL
SONG IN RUSSIA.
♪ AT LAST

SONG IN RUSSIA.
♪ AT LAST
>> OLYA, COME ON, RUSSIA CANNOT

♪ AT LAST
>> OLYA, COME ON, RUSSIA CANNOT
BE THAT TERRIBLE?

>> OLYA, COME ON, RUSSIA CANNOT
BE THAT TERRIBLE?
>> 50 SHADES OF GREY IN RUSSIA

BE THAT TERRIBLE?
>> 50 SHADES OF GREY IN RUSSIA
IS ABOUT MY TEETH.

>> 50 SHADES OF GREY IN RUSSIA
IS ABOUT MY TEETH.
EVEN EBOLA WOULD NOT COME DO

IS ABOUT MY TEETH.
EVEN EBOLA WOULD NOT COME DO
RUSSIA.

EVEN EBOLA WOULD NOT COME DO
RUSSIA.
IT ALMOST CAME, AND THEN IT WAS

RUSSIA.
IT ALMOST CAME, AND THEN IT WAS
LIKE, TOO EASY.

IT ALMOST CAME, AND THEN IT WAS
LIKE, TOO EASY.
>> RUSSIA MUST BE ON SOME KIND

LIKE, TOO EASY.
>> RUSSIA MUST BE ON SOME KIND
OF A FINANCIAL UPSWING.

>> RUSSIA MUST BE ON SOME KIND
OF A FINANCIAL UPSWING.
THEY PROPOSED BUILDING A

OF A FINANCIAL UPSWING.
THEY PROPOSED BUILDING A
TRILLION DOLLAR SUPERHIGHWAY

THEY PROPOSED BUILDING A
TRILLION DOLLAR SUPERHIGHWAY
FROM SIBERIA TO ALASKA.

TRILLION DOLLAR SUPERHIGHWAY
FROM SIBERIA TO ALASKA.
>> WHAT?

FROM SIBERIA TO ALASKA.
>> WHAT?
RUSSIA IS GOING TO BUILD

>> WHAT?
RUSSIA IS GOING TO BUILD
TRILLION DOLLAR ROAD?

RUSSIA IS GOING TO BUILD
TRILLION DOLLAR ROAD?
YEAH, RIGHT, IN YOUR SCREAMS,

TRILLION DOLLAR ROAD?
YEAH, RIGHT, IN YOUR SCREAMS,
RUSSIA.

YEAH, RIGHT, IN YOUR SCREAMS,
RUSSIA.
>> I THINK YOU MEAN IN YOUR

RUSSIA.
>> I THINK YOU MEAN IN YOUR
DREAMS.

>> I THINK YOU MEAN IN YOUR
DREAMS.
>> WHAT IS DREAMS?

DREAMS.
>> WHAT IS DREAMS?
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> WHAT IS DREAMS?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> LISTEN, RUSSIA, RUSSIA, WE

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> LISTEN, RUSSIA, RUSSIA, WE
CANNOT BUILD TRILLION DOLLAR

>> LISTEN, RUSSIA, RUSSIA, WE
CANNOT BUILD TRILLION DOLLAR
ROAD.

CANNOT BUILD TRILLION DOLLAR
ROAD.
WE HAVE BIGGER FISH TO FRY.

ROAD.
WE HAVE BIGGER FISH TO FRY.
LIKE THE FACT THAT WE HAVE NO

WE HAVE BIGGER FISH TO FRY.
LIKE THE FACT THAT WE HAVE NO
FISH TO FRY.

LIKE THE FACT THAT WE HAVE NO
FISH TO FRY.
[ LAUGHTER ]

FISH TO FRY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
WE CANNOT SPEND THIS MONEY.

[ LAUGHTER ]
WE CANNOT SPEND THIS MONEY.
BECAUSE MUCH LIKE KELLY ROWLAND,

WE CANNOT SPEND THIS MONEY.
BECAUSE MUCH LIKE KELLY ROWLAND,
WE JUST DON'T HAVE IT.

BECAUSE MUCH LIKE KELLY ROWLAND,
WE JUST DON'T HAVE IT.
[ AUDIENCE OHS ]

WE JUST DON'T HAVE IT.
[ AUDIENCE OHS ]
>> COME ON.

[ AUDIENCE OHS ]
>> COME ON.
OLYA, THAT'S A BAD BURN.

>> COME ON.
OLYA, THAT'S A BAD BURN.
>> I HAVE TO BURN PEOPLE, COLIN,

OLYA, THAT'S A BAD BURN.
>> I HAVE TO BURN PEOPLE, COLIN,
FOR FUN AND FOR WARMTH.

>> I HAVE TO BURN PEOPLE, COLIN,
FOR FUN AND FOR WARMTH.
[ LAUGHTER ]

FOR FUN AND FOR WARMTH.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WELL, I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WELL, I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
IT'S BEEN PRETTY COLD HERE IN

>> WELL, I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
IT'S BEEN PRETTY COLD HERE IN
NEW YORK CITY.

IT'S BEEN PRETTY COLD HERE IN
NEW YORK CITY.
IT'S BEEN COLD, RAINY.

NEW YORK CITY.
IT'S BEEN COLD, RAINY.
>> YOU DON'T KNOW COLD, I WAS

IT'S BEEN COLD, RAINY.
>> YOU DON'T KNOW COLD, I WAS
BORN INSIDE A FROZEN LAKE.

>> YOU DON'T KNOW COLD, I WAS
BORN INSIDE A FROZEN LAKE.
MY MOTHER FELL IN, AND THE SHOCK

BORN INSIDE A FROZEN LAKE.
MY MOTHER FELL IN, AND THE SHOCK
OF COLD POPPED ME OUT.

MY MOTHER FELL IN, AND THE SHOCK
OF COLD POPPED ME OUT.
YOU KNOW HOW BABIES CRY WHEN

OF COLD POPPED ME OUT.
YOU KNOW HOW BABIES CRY WHEN
THEY FIRST COME OUT?

YOU KNOW HOW BABIES CRY WHEN
THEY FIRST COME OUT?
NOT ME, I ROLL MY EYES I SAY

THEY FIRST COME OUT?
NOT ME, I ROLL MY EYES I SAY
WELL PLAYED, DEVIL.

NOT ME, I ROLL MY EYES I SAY
WELL PLAYED, DEVIL.
I HAVE FROSTBITE EVER SINCE.

WELL PLAYED, DEVIL.
I HAVE FROSTBITE EVER SINCE.
THIS IS WHY MY TOES ARE LIKE ONE

I HAVE FROSTBITE EVER SINCE.
THIS IS WHY MY TOES ARE LIKE ONE
DIRECTION, ONLY FOUR LEFT.

THIS IS WHY MY TOES ARE LIKE ONE
DIRECTION, ONLY FOUR LEFT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

DIRECTION, ONLY FOUR LEFT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
ALSO, MOSTLY HEAVY.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
ALSO, MOSTLY HEAVY.
>> IF RUSSIA'S REALLY THAT BAD,

ALSO, MOSTLY HEAVY.
>> IF RUSSIA'S REALLY THAT BAD,
WHY DON'T YOU JUST MOVE TO

>> IF RUSSIA'S REALLY THAT BAD,
WHY DON'T YOU JUST MOVE TO
AMERICA?

WHY DON'T YOU JUST MOVE TO
AMERICA?
>> COLIN, ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH

AMERICA?
>> COLIN, ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH
OLYA?

>> COLIN, ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH
OLYA?
IS THAT A BANANA IN YOUR POCKET?

OLYA?
IS THAT A BANANA IN YOUR POCKET?
IF THAT'S BANANA, PLEASE GIVE ME

IS THAT A BANANA IN YOUR POCKET?
IF THAT'S BANANA, PLEASE GIVE ME
BANANA.

IF THAT'S BANANA, PLEASE GIVE ME
BANANA.
>> OLYA POVLAVSKI, EVERYONE.

BANANA.
>> OLYA POVLAVSKI, EVERYONE.
>>> GEORGE ZIMMERMAN, WHO SHOT

>> OLYA POVLAVSKI, EVERYONE.
>>> GEORGE ZIMMERMAN, WHO SHOT
TRAYVON MARTIN SPOKE OUT FOR THE

>>> GEORGE ZIMMERMAN, WHO SHOT
TRAYVON MARTIN SPOKE OUT FOR THE
FIRST TIME SAYING HE BLAMES

TRAYVON MARTIN SPOKE OUT FOR THE
FIRST TIME SAYING HE BLAMES
PRESIDENT OBAMA FOR INSIGHTING

FIRST TIME SAYING HE BLAMES
PRESIDENT OBAMA FOR INSIGHTING
RACIAL TENSIONS THAT ERUPTED

PRESIDENT OBAMA FOR INSIGHTING
RACIAL TENSIONS THAT ERUPTED
AFTER THE SHOOTING, AT LEAST HE

RACIAL TENSIONS THAT ERUPTED
AFTER THE SHOOTING, AT LEAST HE
THINKS IT WAS OBAMA.

AFTER THE SHOOTING, AT LEAST HE
THINKS IT WAS OBAMA.
IT WAS PRETTY DARK AT THE TIME.

THINKS IT WAS OBAMA.
IT WAS PRETTY DARK AT THE TIME.
>>> ACCORDING TO A RECENT MEMO,

IT WAS PRETTY DARK AT THE TIME.
>>> ACCORDING TO A RECENT MEMO,
AMERICAN APPAREL WANTS TO STOP

>>> ACCORDING TO A RECENT MEMO,
AMERICAN APPAREL WANTS TO STOP
USING WHAT THEY CALL INSTAGRAM

AMERICAN APPAREL WANTS TO STOP
USING WHAT THEY CALL INSTAGRAM
HOES FOR THEIR ADS AND INSTEAD

USING WHAT THEY CALL INSTAGRAM
HOES FOR THEIR ADS AND INSTEAD
HIRE PROFESSIONAL MODELS.

HOES FOR THEIR ADS AND INSTEAD
HIRE PROFESSIONAL MODELS.
GOOD NEWS, THEY'RE STILL GOING

HIRE PROFESSIONAL MODELS.
GOOD NEWS, THEY'RE STILL GOING
TO MAKE THEM UP TO LOOK LIKE

GOOD NEWS, THEY'RE STILL GOING
TO MAKE THEM UP TO LOOK LIKE
THEY'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED BY HUMAN

TO MAKE THEM UP TO LOOK LIKE
THEY'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED BY HUMAN
TRAFFICKERS.

THEY'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED BY HUMAN
TRAFFICKERS.
WHEN I SEE ADS FOR AMERICAN

TRAFFICKERS.
WHEN I SEE ADS FOR AMERICAN
APPAREL, I DON'T WANT TO BUY

WHEN I SEE ADS FOR AMERICAN
APPAREL, I DON'T WANT TO BUY
CLOTHES, I WANT TO SEE THOSE

APPAREL, I DON'T WANT TO BUY
CLOTHES, I WANT TO SEE THOSE
WOMEN RESCUED BY LIAM NEESON.

CLOTHES, I WANT TO SEE THOSE
WOMEN RESCUED BY LIAM NEESON.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

WOMEN RESCUED BY LIAM NEESON.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> OFFICIALS IN ENGLAND

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> OFFICIALS IN ENGLAND
REBURIED REMAINS OF KING RICHARD

>>> OFFICIALS IN ENGLAND
REBURIED REMAINS OF KING RICHARD
III AFTER HIS BONES WERE

REBURIED REMAINS OF KING RICHARD
III AFTER HIS BONES WERE
DISCOVERED UNDER A PARKING LOT

III AFTER HIS BONES WERE
DISCOVERED UNDER A PARKING LOT
THREE YEARS AGO.

DISCOVERED UNDER A PARKING LOT
THREE YEARS AGO.
THIS TIME, EVERYONE REMEMBER,

THREE YEARS AGO.
THIS TIME, EVERYONE REMEMBER,
HE'S BURIED IN C8.

THIS TIME, EVERYONE REMEMBER,
HE'S BURIED IN C8.
>>> AFTER ONLY SIX DAYS,

HE'S BURIED IN C8.
>>> AFTER ONLY SIX DAYS,
STARBUCKS CANCELED A

>>> AFTER ONLY SIX DAYS,
STARBUCKS CANCELED A
CONTROVERSIAL CAMPAIGN IN WHICH

STARBUCKS CANCELED A
CONTROVERSIAL CAMPAIGN IN WHICH
BARISTAS WOULD WRITE THE SLOGAN

CONTROVERSIAL CAMPAIGN IN WHICH
BARISTAS WOULD WRITE THE SLOGAN
"RACE TOGETHER" ON CUPS TO SPARK

BARISTAS WOULD WRITE THE SLOGAN
"RACE TOGETHER" ON CUPS TO SPARK
CONVERSATIONS ABOUT RACE

"RACE TOGETHER" ON CUPS TO SPARK
CONVERSATIONS ABOUT RACE
RELATIONS.

CONVERSATIONS ABOUT RACE
RELATIONS.
I DON'T KNOW HOW DID THEY THINK

RELATIONS.
I DON'T KNOW HOW DID THEY THINK
THAT WAS GOING TO WORK?

I DON'T KNOW HOW DID THEY THINK
THAT WAS GOING TO WORK?
I MEAN, WERE WE SUPPOSED TO TALK

THAT WAS GOING TO WORK?
I MEAN, WERE WE SUPPOSED TO TALK
ABOUT RACE LIKE WE TALK ABOUT

I MEAN, WERE WE SUPPOSED TO TALK
ABOUT RACE LIKE WE TALK ABOUT
SPORTS?

ABOUT RACE LIKE WE TALK ABOUT
SPORTS?
LIKE, HEY, COLIN, HOW ABOUT

SPORTS?
LIKE, HEY, COLIN, HOW ABOUT
THOSE BLACKS, HUH?

LIKE, HEY, COLIN, HOW ABOUT
THOSE BLACKS, HUH?
CAN'T CATCH A BREAK, AM I RIGHT?

THOSE BLACKS, HUH?
CAN'T CATCH A BREAK, AM I RIGHT?
[ LAUGHTER ]

CAN'T CATCH A BREAK, AM I RIGHT?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YEAH, THEY'VE HAD A ROUGH

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YEAH, THEY'VE HAD A ROUGH
SEASON, I THINK THE WHITES ARE

>> YEAH, THEY'VE HAD A ROUGH
SEASON, I THINK THE WHITES ARE
GOING TO WIN IT ALL AGAIN THIS

SEASON, I THINK THE WHITES ARE
GOING TO WIN IT ALL AGAIN THIS
YEAR.

GOING TO WIN IT ALL AGAIN THIS
YEAR.
>> THEY'RE THE FRONT-RUNNER.

YEAR.
>> THEY'RE THE FRONT-RUNNER.
YOU KNOW WHO YOU REALLY HAVE TO

>> THEY'RE THE FRONT-RUNNER.
YOU KNOW WHO YOU REALLY HAVE TO
WATCH OUT FOR?

YOU KNOW WHO YOU REALLY HAVE TO
WATCH OUT FOR?
>> THE MEXICANS.

WATCH OUT FOR?
>> THE MEXICANS.
YEAH.

>> THE MEXICANS.
YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER ]

YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I KWAEN THE GOING TO SAY

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I KWAEN THE GOING TO SAY
THAT.

>> I KWAEN THE GOING TO SAY
THAT.
>> WELL.

THAT.
>> WELL.
>> I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT.

>> WELL.
>> I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT.
>> THEY'RE HAVING A GOOD YEAR, A

>> I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT.
>> THEY'RE HAVING A GOOD YEAR, A
GOOD FARM SYSTEM.

>> THEY'RE HAVING A GOOD YEAR, A
GOOD FARM SYSTEM.
>>> A CANDY STORE IN LOS ANGELES

GOOD FARM SYSTEM.
>>> A CANDY STORE IN LOS ANGELES
HAS CREATED A 440 POUND PEANUT

>>> A CANDY STORE IN LOS ANGELES
HAS CREATED A 440 POUND PEANUT
BUTTERCUP, IT'S CALLED CEE LO.

HAS CREATED A 440 POUND PEANUT
BUTTERCUP, IT'S CALLED CEE LO.
[ LAUGHTER ]

BUTTERCUP, IT'S CALLED CEE LO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> A NEW STUDY SHOWS THAT A 45

[ LAUGHTER ]
>>> A NEW STUDY SHOWS THAT A 45
MINUTE NAP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE

>>> A NEW STUDY SHOWS THAT A 45
MINUTE NAP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
DAY CAN ENHANCE A PERSON'S

MINUTE NAP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
DAY CAN ENHANCE A PERSON'S
MEMORIES.

DAY CAN ENHANCE A PERSON'S
MEMORIES.
MEMORIES LIKE, OH, RIGHT, I'M AN

MEMORIES.
MEMORIES LIKE, OH, RIGHT, I'M AN
ALCOHOLIC.

MEMORIES LIKE, OH, RIGHT, I'M AN
ALCOHOLIC.
>>> LOUISIANA POLICE ARRESTED A

ALCOHOLIC.
>>> LOUISIANA POLICE ARRESTED A
MAN FOR SHOOTING HIS 18-YEAR-OLD

>>> LOUISIANA POLICE ARRESTED A
MAN FOR SHOOTING HIS 18-YEAR-OLD
SON DURING AN ARGUMENT OVER

MAN FOR SHOOTING HIS 18-YEAR-OLD
SON DURING AN ARGUMENT OVER
ORANGE JUICE.

SON DURING AN ARGUMENT OVER
ORANGE JUICE.
IT'S CONSIDERED THE SECOND WORST

ORANGE JUICE.
IT'S CONSIDERED THE SECOND WORST
CRIME THAT O.J. IS RESPONSIBLE

IT'S CONSIDERED THE SECOND WORST
CRIME THAT O.J. IS RESPONSIBLE
FOR.

CRIME THAT O.J. IS RESPONSIBLE
FOR.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

FOR.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> WELL, IT'S FINALLY SPRING,

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> WELL, IT'S FINALLY SPRING,
AND I FOR ONE HAVE NOT BEEN IN

>>> WELL, IT'S FINALLY SPRING,
AND I FOR ONE HAVE NOT BEEN IN
THE BEST SPIRITS, BUT HERE TO

AND I FOR ONE HAVE NOT BEEN IN
THE BEST SPIRITS, BUT HERE TO
CHEER ME UP IS THE MOST

THE BEST SPIRITS, BUT HERE TO
CHEER ME UP IS THE MOST
OPTIMISTIC GUY I KNOW, WILLIE.

CHEER ME UP IS THE MOST
OPTIMISTIC GUY I KNOW, WILLIE.
>> HAPPY SPRINGTIME, EVERYBODY.

OPTIMISTIC GUY I KNOW, WILLIE.
>> HAPPY SPRINGTIME, EVERYBODY.
MY FAVORITE SEASON.

>> HAPPY SPRINGTIME, EVERYBODY.
MY FAVORITE SEASON.
BIRDS ARE CHIRPING.

MY FAVORITE SEASON.
BIRDS ARE CHIRPING.
IT'S SO NICE I WOULDN'T SLEEP

BIRDS ARE CHIRPING.
IT'S SO NICE I WOULDN'T SLEEP
INDOORS EVEN IF I COULD.

IT'S SO NICE I WOULDN'T SLEEP
INDOORS EVEN IF I COULD.
>> YOU HAVE TO SLEEP OUTDOORS?

INDOORS EVEN IF I COULD.
>> YOU HAVE TO SLEEP OUTDOORS?
>> I GET TO, MICHAEL.

>> YOU HAVE TO SLEEP OUTDOORS?
>> I GET TO, MICHAEL.
ALSO, I HAVE TO.

>> I GET TO, MICHAEL.
ALSO, I HAVE TO.
IT'S LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY, YOU

ALSO, I HAVE TO.
IT'S LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY, YOU
GAVE YOUR MONEY TO A CONMAN,

IT'S LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY, YOU
GAVE YOUR MONEY TO A CONMAN,
WILLIE.

GAVE YOUR MONEY TO A CONMAN,
WILLIE.
>> THAT'S NOT CHEERING ME UP,

WILLIE.
>> THAT'S NOT CHEERING ME UP,
I'M SORRY.

>> THAT'S NOT CHEERING ME UP,
I'M SORRY.
>> COME ON, MICHAEL.

I'M SORRY.
>> COME ON, MICHAEL.
SPRING TIME IS THE BEST TIME,

>> COME ON, MICHAEL.
SPRING TIME IS THE BEST TIME,
EASTER WILL BE HERE SOON.

SPRING TIME IS THE BEST TIME,
EASTER WILL BE HERE SOON.
REMINDS ME OF WHEN I WAS A

EASTER WILL BE HERE SOON.
REMINDS ME OF WHEN I WAS A
LITTLE BOY, LOOKING FOR

REMINDS ME OF WHEN I WAS A
LITTLE BOY, LOOKING FOR
CHOCOLATE EGGS AROUND THE HOUSE.

LITTLE BOY, LOOKING FOR
CHOCOLATE EGGS AROUND THE HOUSE.
GET OUT OF THE LITTER BOX,

CHOCOLATE EGGS AROUND THE HOUSE.
GET OUT OF THE LITTER BOX,
WILLIE.

GET OUT OF THE LITTER BOX,
WILLIE.
>> THAT'S DISGUSTING.

WILLIE.
>> THAT'S DISGUSTING.
>> COME ON.

>> THAT'S DISGUSTING.
>> COME ON.
A LITTLE CAT DUKIE CAN'T HURT

>> COME ON.
A LITTLE CAT DUKIE CAN'T HURT
YOU.

A LITTLE CAT DUKIE CAN'T HURT
YOU.
>> YEAH, IT CAN.

YOU.
>> YEAH, IT CAN.
>> BUT IT'S BASEBALL SEASON,

>> YEAH, IT CAN.
>> BUT IT'S BASEBALL SEASON,
MICHAEL.

>> BUT IT'S BASEBALL SEASON,
MICHAEL.
>> WHAT?

MICHAEL.
>> WHAT?
>> TAKES ME BACK TO WHEN I WAS

>> WHAT?
>> TAKES ME BACK TO WHEN I WAS
SIX YEARS OLD AND MY DADDY TOOK

>> TAKES ME BACK TO WHEN I WAS
SIX YEARS OLD AND MY DADDY TOOK
ME DOWN TO YANKEE STADIUM, FOR

SIX YEARS OLD AND MY DADDY TOOK
ME DOWN TO YANKEE STADIUM, FOR
MY FIRST BALL GAME.

ME DOWN TO YANKEE STADIUM, FOR
MY FIRST BALL GAME.
I WAS SO EXCITED.

MY FIRST BALL GAME.
I WAS SO EXCITED.
HE LOOKED AT ME AND SAID, SON,

I WAS SO EXCITED.
HE LOOKED AT ME AND SAID, SON,
LOOK OUT THERE AT CENTERFIELD,

HE LOOKED AT ME AND SAID, SON,
LOOK OUT THERE AT CENTERFIELD,
THAT'S MICKEY MANTLE.

LOOK OUT THERE AT CENTERFIELD,
THAT'S MICKEY MANTLE.
HE'S SLEEPING WITH YOUR MOTHER,

THAT'S MICKEY MANTLE.
HE'S SLEEPING WITH YOUR MOTHER,
AND I'M GOING TO SHOOT HIM.

HE'S SLEEPING WITH YOUR MOTHER,
AND I'M GOING TO SHOOT HIM.
>> THOSE ARE TERRIBLE MEMORIES,

AND I'M GOING TO SHOOT HIM.
>> THOSE ARE TERRIBLE MEMORIES,
MAN.

>> THOSE ARE TERRIBLE MEMORIES,
MAN.
>> THAT'S THE POINT, MICHAEL.

MAN.
>> THAT'S THE POINT, MICHAEL.
>> HOW IS THAT THE POINT?

>> THAT'S THE POINT, MICHAEL.
>> HOW IS THAT THE POINT?
>> SPRING IS ABOUT NEW

>> HOW IS THAT THE POINT?
>> SPRING IS ABOUT NEW
BEGINNINGS, A FRESH START,

>> SPRING IS ABOUT NEW
BEGINNINGS, A FRESH START,
REBIRTH.

BEGINNINGS, A FRESH START,
REBIRTH.
>> OKAY.

REBIRTH.
>> OKAY.
YOU KNOW WHO LOVED THE SPRING?

>> OKAY.
YOU KNOW WHO LOVED THE SPRING?
>> WHO?

YOU KNOW WHO LOVED THE SPRING?
>> WHO?
>> MY OLD DOG LUCIOUS.

>> WHO?
>> MY OLD DOG LUCIOUS.
I LET HIM OFF THE LEASH, HE

>> MY OLD DOG LUCIOUS.
I LET HIM OFF THE LEASH, HE
WOULD RUN AS FAR AS HE COULD.

I LET HIM OFF THE LEASH, HE
WOULD RUN AS FAR AS HE COULD.
I CAN REMEMBER HIS BARKING

WOULD RUN AS FAR AS HE COULD.
I CAN REMEMBER HIS BARKING
GETTING FAINTER AND FAINTER AS

I CAN REMEMBER HIS BARKING
GETTING FAINTER AND FAINTER AS
THOSE WOLVES DRAGGED HIM INTO

GETTING FAINTER AND FAINTER AS
THOSE WOLVES DRAGGED HIM INTO
THE WOODS.

THOSE WOLVES DRAGGED HIM INTO
THE WOODS.
IT'S LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY,

THE WOODS.
IT'S LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY,
WOLVES RACE YOUR DOG AGAIN

IT'S LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY,
WOLVES RACE YOUR DOG AGAIN
WILLIE.

WOLVES RACE YOUR DOG AGAIN
WILLIE.
[ LAUGHTER ]

WILLIE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> SO NONE OF THESE MEMORIES BUM

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> SO NONE OF THESE MEMORIES BUM
YOU OUT?

>> SO NONE OF THESE MEMORIES BUM
YOU OUT?
>> I WOULDN'T SAY THAT

YOU OUT?
>> I WOULDN'T SAY THAT
SPRINGTIME DOES MAKE ME LONELY.

>> I WOULDN'T SAY THAT
SPRINGTIME DOES MAKE ME LONELY.
I MISS MY WIFE.

SPRINGTIME DOES MAKE ME LONELY.
I MISS MY WIFE.
>> I'M SORRY.

I MISS MY WIFE.
>> I'M SORRY.
>> I BET SHE'D STILL BE WITH ME

>> I'M SORRY.
>> I BET SHE'D STILL BE WITH ME
TODAY IF I HAD JUST LISTENED

>> I BET SHE'D STILL BE WITH ME
TODAY IF I HAD JUST LISTENED
WHEN SHE SAID, HIT THE BRAKES,

TODAY IF I HAD JUST LISTENED
WHEN SHE SAID, HIT THE BRAKES,
WILLIE.

WHEN SHE SAID, HIT THE BRAKES,
WILLIE.
[ LAUGHTER ]

WILLIE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, MICHAEL, IT'S

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, MICHAEL, IT'S
BETTER TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST

>> YOU KNOW WHAT, MICHAEL, IT'S
BETTER TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST
THAN TO HAVE NEVER WON A DRAG

BETTER TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST
THAN TO HAVE NEVER WON A DRAG
RACE.

THAN TO HAVE NEVER WON A DRAG
RACE.
[ APPLAUSE ]

RACE.
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> HEY, MAN, IF YOU EVER GET TOO

[ APPLAUSE ]
>> HEY, MAN, IF YOU EVER GET TOO
LONELY, YOU CAN ALWAYS CALL ME.

>> HEY, MAN, IF YOU EVER GET TOO
LONELY, YOU CAN ALWAYS CALL ME.
>> THAT'S NICE OF YOU, MICHAEL.

LONELY, YOU CAN ALWAYS CALL ME.
>> THAT'S NICE OF YOU, MICHAEL.
FRIENDSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT

>> THAT'S NICE OF YOU, MICHAEL.
FRIENDSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT
THING IN THE WORLD TO ME.

FRIENDSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT
THING IN THE WORLD TO ME.
IT'S LIKE I ALWAYS SAY.

THING IN THE WORLD TO ME.
IT'S LIKE I ALWAYS SAY.
THERE AIN'T NO GOD.

IT'S LIKE I ALWAYS SAY.
THERE AIN'T NO GOD.
>> WILLIE, EVERYBODY.

THERE AIN'T NO GOD.
>> WILLIE, EVERYBODY.
>> THAT'S ME.

>> WILLIE, EVERYBODY.
>> THAT'S ME.
>> I'M MICHAEL CHE.

>> THAT'S ME.
>> I'M MICHAEL CHE.
>> I'M COLIN JOST.

>> I'M MICHAEL CHE.
>> I'M COLIN JOST.
GOOD NIGHT.

>> I'M COLIN JOST.
GOOD NIGHT.
>>> AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR

GOOD NIGHT.
>>> AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR
COOKING WITH PAUL.

>>> AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR
COOKING WITH PAUL.
PAUL MONTAIGNE IS A

COOKING WITH PAUL.
PAUL MONTAIGNE IS A
JAMES BEARD AWARD-WINNING CHEF,

PAUL MONTAIGNE IS A
JAMES BEARD AWARD-WINNING CHEF,
AND A THREE TIMES CONVICTED SEX

JAMES BEARD AWARD-WINNING CHEF,
AND A THREE TIMES CONVICTED SEX
OFFENDER.

AND A THREE TIMES CONVICTED SEX
OFFENDER.
[ LAUGHTER ]

OFFENDER.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WELL, HELLO THERE FOLKS.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WELL, HELLO THERE FOLKS.
TODAY WE'RE GOING TO BE COOKING

>> WELL, HELLO THERE FOLKS.
TODAY WE'RE GOING TO BE COOKING
MY FAMOUS GARLIC MASHED POTATOES

TODAY WE'RE GOING TO BE COOKING
MY FAMOUS GARLIC MASHED POTATOES
AND ROSEMARY THAI CHICKEN.

MY FAMOUS GARLIC MASHED POTATOES
AND ROSEMARY THAI CHICKEN.
WITH ME AS ALWAYS IS MY SIDEKICK

AND ROSEMARY THAI CHICKEN.
WITH ME AS ALWAYS IS MY SIDEKICK
MITCH.

WITH ME AS ALWAYS IS MY SIDEKICK
MITCH.
>> I'M NOT YOUR SIDEKICK, PAUL.

MITCH.
>> I'M NOT YOUR SIDEKICK, PAUL.
I'M YOUR PROBATION OFFICER.

>> I'M NOT YOUR SIDEKICK, PAUL.
I'M YOUR PROBATION OFFICER.
[ LAUGHTER ]

I'M YOUR PROBATION OFFICER.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WE DO BANTER, THOUGH, DON'T

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WE DO BANTER, THOUGH, DON'T
WE?

>> WE DO BANTER, THOUGH, DON'T
WE?
OKAY.

WE?
OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]

OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
NOW, LET'S START COOKING.

[ LAUGHTER ]
NOW, LET'S START COOKING.
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO DO

NOW, LET'S START COOKING.
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO DO
IS BOIL SOME WATER.

THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO DO
IS BOIL SOME WATER.
YOU WANT TO PUT A POT ON THE

IS BOIL SOME WATER.
YOU WANT TO PUT A POT ON THE
STOVE, TURN UP THE GAS.

YOU WANT TO PUT A POT ON THE
STOVE, TURN UP THE GAS.
THAT'S GOING TO TAKE ABOUT FIVE

STOVE, TURN UP THE GAS.
THAT'S GOING TO TAKE ABOUT FIVE
MINUTES.

THAT'S GOING TO TAKE ABOUT FIVE
MINUTES.
YOU HAVE A LITTLE TIME TO KILL.

MINUTES.
YOU HAVE A LITTLE TIME TO KILL.
LET'S GO AHEAD AND POP AROUND ON

YOU HAVE A LITTLE TIME TO KILL.
LET'S GO AHEAD AND POP AROUND ON
THE INTERNET, CHECK OUT THE CHAT

LET'S GO AHEAD AND POP AROUND ON
THE INTERNET, CHECK OUT THE CHAT
ROOMS.

THE INTERNET, CHECK OUT THE CHAT
ROOMS.
[ LAUGHTER ]

ROOMS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED ON THE

>> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED ON THE
INTERNET, PAUL.

YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED ON THE
INTERNET, PAUL.
>> OKAY.

INTERNET, PAUL.
>> OKAY.
NOW WE'RE GOING TO SPRINKLE SOME

>> OKAY.
NOW WE'RE GOING TO SPRINKLE SOME
ROSEMARY ONTO OUR CHICKEN.

NOW WE'RE GOING TO SPRINKLE SOME
ROSEMARY ONTO OUR CHICKEN.
GO AHEAD AND POUR ON THOSE

ROSEMARY ONTO OUR CHICKEN.
GO AHEAD AND POUR ON THOSE
SAUTEED ONIONS.

GO AHEAD AND POUR ON THOSE
SAUTEED ONIONS.
YEAH, I LIKE THAT.

SAUTEED ONIONS.
YEAH, I LIKE THAT.
AND NOW LET'S PLACE THIS WHOLE

YEAH, I LIKE THAT.
AND NOW LET'S PLACE THIS WHOLE
PAN IN THE OVEN, TURN IT UP TO

AND NOW LET'S PLACE THIS WHOLE
PAN IN THE OVEN, TURN IT UP TO
400 DEGREES, WAIT FOR IT TO TURN

PAN IN THE OVEN, TURN IT UP TO
400 DEGREES, WAIT FOR IT TO TURN
BROWN.

400 DEGREES, WAIT FOR IT TO TURN
BROWN.
OKAY.

BROWN.
OKAY.
YOU GOING TO LET THAT SIT FOR

OKAY.
YOU GOING TO LET THAT SIT FOR
ABOUT 30 MINUTES.

YOU GOING TO LET THAT SIT FOR
ABOUT 30 MINUTES.
GOT A LITTLE TIME.

ABOUT 30 MINUTES.
GOT A LITTLE TIME.
LET'S GO AHEAD AND POP AROUND ON

GOT A LITTLE TIME.
LET'S GO AHEAD AND POP AROUND ON
THE INTERNET AND MEET SOME

LET'S GO AHEAD AND POP AROUND ON
THE INTERNET AND MEET SOME
LITTLE BUDDIES.

THE INTERNET AND MEET SOME
LITTLE BUDDIES.
[ LAUGHTER ]

LITTLE BUDDIES.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HELL NO, PAUL.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HELL NO, PAUL.
HELL NO.

>> HELL NO, PAUL.
HELL NO.
>> I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING.

HELL NO.
>> I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING.
I'M JUST LOOKING AT MASTER CHEF,

>> I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING.
I'M JUST LOOKING AT MASTER CHEF,
JR.

I'M JUST LOOKING AT MASTER CHEF,
JR.
>> THOSE AREN'T CHEFS, PAUL.

JR.
>> THOSE AREN'T CHEFS, PAUL.
>> OKAY.

>> THOSE AREN'T CHEFS, PAUL.
>> OKAY.
NOW LET'S CHECK ON OUR POT OF

>> OKAY.
NOW LET'S CHECK ON OUR POT OF
WATER.

NOW LET'S CHECK ON OUR POT OF
WATER.
IT'S BOILING!

WATER.
IT'S BOILING!
[ LAUGHTER ]

IT'S BOILING!
[ LAUGHTER ]
WE NEED TO PUT IN THE POTATOES.

[ LAUGHTER ]
WE NEED TO PUT IN THE POTATOES.
NOW WE'RE GOING TO LET THOSE SIT

WE NEED TO PUT IN THE POTATOES.
NOW WE'RE GOING TO LET THOSE SIT
ABOUT FOUR MINUTES.

NOW WE'RE GOING TO LET THOSE SIT
ABOUT FOUR MINUTES.
SO YOU GOT A LITTLE TIME?

ABOUT FOUR MINUTES.
SO YOU GOT A LITTLE TIME?
>> NO.

SO YOU GOT A LITTLE TIME?
>> NO.
>> POP AROUND ON THE INTERNET,

>> NO.
>> POP AROUND ON THE INTERNET,
MEET SOME FOLKS.

>> POP AROUND ON THE INTERNET,
MEET SOME FOLKS.
[ LAUGHTER ]

MEET SOME FOLKS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NO, NO.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NO, NO.
THAT'S IT, I'M TAKING THIS

>> NO, NO.
THAT'S IT, I'M TAKING THIS
COMPUTER AWAY.

THAT'S IT, I'M TAKING THIS
COMPUTER AWAY.
>> OKAY.

COMPUTER AWAY.
>> OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> PAUL.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> PAUL.
PAUL.

>> PAUL.
PAUL.
>> OH, OH, OH.

PAUL.
>> OH, OH, OH.
OH, NO.

>> OH, OH, OH.
OH, NO.
I ACCIDENTALLY SET IT TO 4,000

OH, NO.
I ACCIDENTALLY SET IT TO 4,000
DEGREES.

I ACCIDENTALLY SET IT TO 4,000
DEGREES.
INSTEAD OF 400.

DEGREES.
INSTEAD OF 400.
>> PAUL, CALL THE FIRE

INSTEAD OF 400.
>> PAUL, CALL THE FIRE
DEPARTMENT.

>> PAUL, CALL THE FIRE
DEPARTMENT.
>> OKAY, CALLING THE FIRE

DEPARTMENT.
>> OKAY, CALLING THE FIRE
DEPARTMENT.

>> OKAY, CALLING THE FIRE
DEPARTMENT.
LET'S SEE, WHAT'S THE NUMBER.

DEPARTMENT.
LET'S SEE, WHAT'S THE NUMBER.
212-555-0187.

LET'S SEE, WHAT'S THE NUMBER.
212-555-0187.
YES, HELLO, MRS. HENDERSON, IS

212-555-0187.
YES, HELLO, MRS. HENDERSON, IS
BILLY AT HOME?

YES, HELLO, MRS. HENDERSON, IS
BILLY AT HOME?
>> LANG UP THE PHONE.

BILLY AT HOME?
>> LANG UP THE PHONE.
>> YOU ARE NO FUN.

>> LANG UP THE PHONE.
>> YOU ARE NO FUN.
>> I'M NOT PAID TO BE FUN.

>> YOU ARE NO FUN.
>> I'M NOT PAID TO BE FUN.
>> IT MAKES ME SAD TO SAY THAT.

>> I'M NOT PAID TO BE FUN.
>> IT MAKES ME SAD TO SAY THAT.
>> IT MAKES ME SAD THAT YOU HUNG

>> IT MAKES ME SAD TO SAY THAT.
>> IT MAKES ME SAD THAT YOU HUNG
OUT IN THE WELL OF A

>> IT MAKES ME SAD THAT YOU HUNG
OUT IN THE WELL OF A
PORT-A-POTTY TO TAKE PICTURES OF

OUT IN THE WELL OF A
PORT-A-POTTY TO TAKE PICTURES OF
PEOPLE'S BUTTS.

PORT-A-POTTY TO TAKE PICTURES OF
PEOPLE'S BUTTS.
>> LET'S GET OUR INGREDIENTS

PEOPLE'S BUTTS.
>> LET'S GET OUR INGREDIENTS
TOGETHER.

>> LET'S GET OUR INGREDIENTS
TOGETHER.
WE'RE GOING TO PUT IN OUR BUTTER

TOGETHER.
WE'RE GOING TO PUT IN OUR BUTTER
HERE, AND WE'RE GOING TO DUMP IN

WE'RE GOING TO PUT IN OUR BUTTER
HERE, AND WE'RE GOING TO DUMP IN
SOME OF OUR CHIVES.

HERE, AND WE'RE GOING TO DUMP IN
SOME OF OUR CHIVES.
I THINK I'LL GET ON THE

SOME OF OUR CHIVES.
I THINK I'LL GET ON THE
COMPUTER, GO TO YOUR FAVORITE

I THINK I'LL GET ON THE
COMPUTER, GO TO YOUR FAVORITE
SITE.

COMPUTER, GO TO YOUR FAVORITE
SITE.
>> NO, NO, NO, NO.

SITE.
>> NO, NO, NO, NO.
>> OKAY.

>> NO, NO, NO, NO.
>> OKAY.
>> WELL, THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE

>> OKAY.
>> WELL, THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE
HAVE.

>> WELL, THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE
HAVE.
WE DIDN'T FINISH COOKING THE

HAVE.
WE DIDN'T FINISH COOKING THE
MEAL, BUT LET'S ALL CLOSE OUR

WE DIDN'T FINISH COOKING THE
MEAL, BUT LET'S ALL CLOSE OUR
EYES AND IMAGINE WHAT IT TASTES

MEAL, BUT LET'S ALL CLOSE OUR
EYES AND IMAGINE WHAT IT TASTES
LIKE.

EYES AND IMAGINE WHAT IT TASTES
LIKE.
[ LAUGHTER ]

LIKE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HEY, HEY.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HEY, HEY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

>> HEY, HEY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
[ APPLAUSE ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
[ APPLAUSE ]
>>> OKAY, EVERYONE.

[ APPLAUSE ]
>>> OKAY, EVERYONE.
LET'S KEEP TONIGHT MOVING.

>>> OKAY, EVERYONE.
LET'S KEEP TONIGHT MOVING.
THE NEXT TEAM IS ONE OF THE BEST

LET'S KEEP TONIGHT MOVING.
THE NEXT TEAM IS ONE OF THE BEST
IMPROV TEAMS IN THE CITY.

THE NEXT TEAM IS ONE OF THE BEST
IMPROV TEAMS IN THE CITY.
GIVE IT UP FOR PRINCE CHARMIM.

IMPROV TEAMS IN THE CITY.
GIVE IT UP FOR PRINCE CHARMIM.
♪

GIVE IT UP FOR PRINCE CHARMIM.
♪
[ LAUGHTER ]

♪
[ LAUGHTER ]
♪

[ LAUGHTER ]
♪
>> OKAY, OKAY, TURN IT DOWN IN

♪
>> OKAY, OKAY, TURN IT DOWN IN
THE BOOTH.

>> OKAY, OKAY, TURN IT DOWN IN
THE BOOTH.
THANK YOU FRANK.

THE BOOTH.
THANK YOU FRANK.
TURN IT DOWN IN THE BOOTH,

THANK YOU FRANK.
TURN IT DOWN IN THE BOOTH,
PLEASE.

TURN IT DOWN IN THE BOOTH,
PLEASE.
WE ARE PRINCE CHARMIM.

PLEASE.
WE ARE PRINCE CHARMIM.
SO EVERYTHING YOU'RE ABOUT TO

WE ARE PRINCE CHARMIM.
SO EVERYTHING YOU'RE ABOUT TO
SEE IS TOTALLY MADE UP FOR YOU

SO EVERYTHING YOU'RE ABOUT TO
SEE IS TOTALLY MADE UP FOR YOU
ON THE SPOT.

SEE IS TOTALLY MADE UP FOR YOU
ON THE SPOT.
IT'S NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE, AND

ON THE SPOT.
IT'S NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE, AND
IT WILL NEVER BE DONE AGAIN.

IT'S NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE, AND
IT WILL NEVER BE DONE AGAIN.
>> ONE NIGHT ONLY FOLKS.

IT WILL NEVER BE DONE AGAIN.
>> ONE NIGHT ONLY FOLKS.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> ONE NIGHT ONLY FOLKS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> SO TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> SO TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO
IMPROVISE A WHOLE SHOW ABOUT ONE

>> SO TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO
IMPROVISE A WHOLE SHOW ABOUT ONE
OF YOU.

IMPROVISE A WHOLE SHOW ABOUT ONE
OF YOU.
WHO WANTS TO GET UP HERE AND GET

OF YOU.
WHO WANTS TO GET UP HERE AND GET
INTERVIEWED?

WHO WANTS TO GET UP HERE AND GET
INTERVIEWED?
OKAY, YES, I SEE A SMALL

INTERVIEWED?
OKAY, YES, I SEE A SMALL
SHRIVELED HAND UP THERE, COME ON

OKAY, YES, I SEE A SMALL
SHRIVELED HAND UP THERE, COME ON
UP HERE, DUDE, COME UP.

SHRIVELED HAND UP THERE, COME ON
UP HERE, DUDE, COME UP.
TAKE A SEAT, WHAT'S YOUR NAME,

UP HERE, DUDE, COME UP.
TAKE A SEAT, WHAT'S YOUR NAME,
BUD?

TAKE A SEAT, WHAT'S YOUR NAME,
BUD?
>> MY NAME IS ROBERT DURST.

BUD?
>> MY NAME IS ROBERT DURST.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> MY NAME IS ROBERT DURST.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OKAY, ROBERT.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OKAY, ROBERT.
TELL US A LITTLE BIT ABOUT

>> OKAY, ROBERT.
TELL US A LITTLE BIT ABOUT
YOURSELF?

TELL US A LITTLE BIT ABOUT
YOURSELF?
I DON'T KNOW, I'M FROM

YOURSELF?
I DON'T KNOW, I'M FROM
SCARSDALE.

I DON'T KNOW, I'M FROM
SCARSDALE.
I HAVE BLACK EYES, AND ONE TIME

SCARSDALE.
I HAVE BLACK EYES, AND ONE TIME
I CHOPPED UP MY BEST FRIEND.

I HAVE BLACK EYES, AND ONE TIME
I CHOPPED UP MY BEST FRIEND.
I DON'T KNOW, I'M A PSYCHO.

I CHOPPED UP MY BEST FRIEND.
I DON'T KNOW, I'M A PSYCHO.
>> AY, AY, AY, ROBERT, THIS IS A

I DON'T KNOW, I'M A PSYCHO.
>> AY, AY, AY, ROBERT, THIS IS A
COMEDY SHOW OKAY, LET'S KEEP

>> AY, AY, AY, ROBERT, THIS IS A
COMEDY SHOW OKAY, LET'S KEEP
THINGS A LITTLE LIGHTER.

COMEDY SHOW OKAY, LET'S KEEP
THINGS A LITTLE LIGHTER.
>> YEAH, OF COURSE I CAN DO

THINGS A LITTLE LIGHTER.
>> YEAH, OF COURSE I CAN DO
THAT.

>> YEAH, OF COURSE I CAN DO
THAT.
>> SO, ROBERT, WHAT DID YOU DO

THAT.
>> SO, ROBERT, WHAT DID YOU DO
TODAY?

>> SO, ROBERT, WHAT DID YOU DO
TODAY?
>> WELL, I WOKE UP AND SHAVED

TODAY?
>> WELL, I WOKE UP AND SHAVED
OFF MY EYEBROWS.

>> WELL, I WOKE UP AND SHAVED
OFF MY EYEBROWS.
THEN FOR LUNCH, I WENT TO

OFF MY EYEBROWS.
THEN FOR LUNCH, I WENT TO
WEGMANS, I STOLE A CHICKEN SALAD

THEN FOR LUNCH, I WENT TO
WEGMANS, I STOLE A CHICKEN SALAD
SANDWICH.

WEGMANS, I STOLE A CHICKEN SALAD
SANDWICH.
I HAVE $400,000 CASH IN THE CAR,

SANDWICH.
I HAVE $400,000 CASH IN THE CAR,
I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO PAY FOR

I HAVE $400,000 CASH IN THE CAR,
I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO PAY FOR
IT, I DON'T KNOW.

I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO PAY FOR
IT, I DON'T KNOW.
>> DRINKS ARE ON THIS GUY.

IT, I DON'T KNOW.
>> DRINKS ARE ON THIS GUY.
>> NOAH, YOU'RE CRAZY.

>> DRINKS ARE ON THIS GUY.
>> NOAH, YOU'RE CRAZY.
>> YOU HAVE TOO MUCH ENERGY.

>> NOAH, YOU'RE CRAZY.
>> YOU HAVE TOO MUCH ENERGY.
WHAT'S YOUR ADDRESS?

>> YOU HAVE TOO MUCH ENERGY.
WHAT'S YOUR ADDRESS?
>> I LIVE RIGHT ACROSS FROM JFK.

WHAT'S YOUR ADDRESS?
>> I LIVE RIGHT ACROSS FROM JFK.
SO NOW, ROBERT, IS THERE ANY

>> I LIVE RIGHT ACROSS FROM JFK.
SO NOW, ROBERT, IS THERE ANY
SPECIAL LADY IN YOUR LIFE?

SO NOW, ROBERT, IS THERE ANY
SPECIAL LADY IN YOUR LIFE?
>> OR GENTLEMEN.

SPECIAL LADY IN YOUR LIFE?
>> OR GENTLEMEN.
OR GENTLEMEN.

>> OR GENTLEMEN.
OR GENTLEMEN.
>> WELL, THERE IS ONE LADY, HER

OR GENTLEMEN.
>> WELL, THERE IS ONE LADY, HER
NAME IS JANINE PIERO.

>> WELL, THERE IS ONE LADY, HER
NAME IS JANINE PIERO.
>> WHO IS JANINE.

NAME IS JANINE PIERO.
>> WHO IS JANINE.
>> OH, SHE'S SOME [ BLEEP ] FROM

>> WHO IS JANINE.
>> OH, SHE'S SOME [ BLEEP ] FROM
NEW YORK.

>> OH, SHE'S SOME [ BLEEP ] FROM
NEW YORK.
>> I HOPE SHE'S NOT HERE

NEW YORK.
>> I HOPE SHE'S NOT HERE
TONIGHT.

>> I HOPE SHE'S NOT HERE
TONIGHT.
>> I AM.

TONIGHT.
>> I AM.
I'M ALWAYS RIGHT BEHIND YOU,

>> I AM.
I'M ALWAYS RIGHT BEHIND YOU,
ROBERT.

I'M ALWAYS RIGHT BEHIND YOU,
ROBERT.
AND I'M GOING TO CATCH YOU WITH

ROBERT.
AND I'M GOING TO CATCH YOU WITH
MY OWN TWO GORGEOUSLY MANICURED

AND I'M GOING TO CATCH YOU WITH
MY OWN TWO GORGEOUSLY MANICURED
HANDS OR MY NAME'S NOT JANINE

MY OWN TWO GORGEOUSLY MANICURED
HANDS OR MY NAME'S NOT JANINE
PIERO.

HANDS OR MY NAME'S NOT JANINE
PIERO.
>> SHE'S GOING TO DIE.

PIERO.
>> SHE'S GOING TO DIE.
>> WHAT WAS THAT, DUDE?

>> SHE'S GOING TO DIE.
>> WHAT WAS THAT, DUDE?
>> YOU GOING TO KILL HER?

>> WHAT WAS THAT, DUDE?
>> YOU GOING TO KILL HER?
>> OH, ROBERT, YOU DID IT AGAIN.

>> YOU GOING TO KILL HER?
>> OH, ROBERT, YOU DID IT AGAIN.
>> DID WHAT?

>> OH, ROBERT, YOU DID IT AGAIN.
>> DID WHAT?
>> KILLED THEM ALL, OF COURSE.

>> DID WHAT?
>> KILLED THEM ALL, OF COURSE.
>> OKAY, VERY COOL.

>> KILLED THEM ALL, OF COURSE.
>> OKAY, VERY COOL.
LET'S GIVE ROBERT A ROUND OF

>> OKAY, VERY COOL.
LET'S GIVE ROBERT A ROUND OF
APPLAUSE.

LET'S GIVE ROBERT A ROUND OF
APPLAUSE.
>> NOW WE'RE GOING TO IMPROVISE

APPLAUSE.
>> NOW WE'RE GOING TO IMPROVISE
A SET BASED ENTIRELY ON ROBERT

>> NOW WE'RE GOING TO IMPROVISE
A SET BASED ENTIRELY ON ROBERT
DURST.

A SET BASED ENTIRELY ON ROBERT
DURST.
>> HEY, WILL YOU HOLD THIS

DURST.
>> HEY, WILL YOU HOLD THIS
SANDWICH FOR ME?

>> HEY, WILL YOU HOLD THIS
SANDWICH FOR ME?
I GOT TO GO KILL SOMEONE.

SANDWICH FOR ME?
I GOT TO GO KILL SOMEONE.
>> WOW!

I GOT TO GO KILL SOMEONE.
>> WOW!
THAT'S ME.

>> WOW!
THAT'S ME.
[ APPLAUSE ]

THAT'S ME.
[ APPLAUSE ]
>>> ONCE AGAIN, GEORGE EZRA.

[ APPLAUSE ]
>>> ONCE AGAIN, GEORGE EZRA.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

>>> ONCE AGAIN, GEORGE EZRA.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪
♪ THE GARDEN WAS BLESSED

♪
♪ THE GARDEN WAS BLESSED
BY THE GODS OF ME AND YOU

♪ THE GARDEN WAS BLESSED
BY THE GODS OF ME AND YOU
WE HEADED WEST FOR TO FIND

BY THE GODS OF ME AND YOU
WE HEADED WEST FOR TO FIND
OURSELVES SOME TRUTH OOH ♪

WE HEADED WEST FOR TO FIND
OURSELVES SOME TRUTH OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

OURSELVES SOME TRUTH OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪

♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WE COUNTED ALL OUR REASONS

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WE COUNTED ALL OUR REASONS
EXCUSES THAT WE MADE

♪ WE COUNTED ALL OUR REASONS
EXCUSES THAT WE MADE
WE FOUND OURSELVES SOME

EXCUSES THAT WE MADE
WE FOUND OURSELVES SOME
TREASURE AND THREW IT

WE FOUND OURSELVES SOME
TREASURE AND THREW IT
ALL AWAY OOH ♪

TREASURE AND THREW IT
ALL AWAY OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

ALL AWAY OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO, WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪

WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO, WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE

NO, WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN

♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN
BLAME IT ON ME ♪

AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN
BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL

BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL
AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED

♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL
AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED
BLAME IT ON ME ♪

AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED
BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪

♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ CAUGHT IN THE TIDE OF

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ CAUGHT IN THE TIDE OF
BLOSSOM CAUGHT IN THE

♪ CAUGHT IN THE TIDE OF
BLOSSOM CAUGHT IN THE
CARNIVAL ♪

BLOSSOM CAUGHT IN THE
CARNIVAL ♪
♪ YOUR CONFIDENCE FORGOTTEN

CARNIVAL ♪
♪ YOUR CONFIDENCE FORGOTTEN
I SEE THE GYPSIES RULE OOH ♪

♪ YOUR CONFIDENCE FORGOTTEN
I SEE THE GYPSIES RULE OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

I SEE THE GYPSIES RULE OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪

WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN

♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN
BLAME IT ON ME ♪

AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN
BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL

BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL
AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED

♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL
AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED
BLAME IT ON ME ♪

AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED
BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪

WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN

♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN
BLAME IT ON ME ♪

AND THE SUN'S BEATING DOWN
BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL

BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL
AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED

♪ WHEN I LOSE CONTROL
AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED
BLAME IT ON ME ♪

AND THE VEIL'S OVERUSED
BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE

BLAME IT ON ME ♪
♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
I KNOW I'LL GO

♪ WHEN I DANCE ALONE
I KNOW I'LL GO
BLAME IT ON ME OOH ♪

I KNOW I'LL GO
BLAME IT ON ME OOH ♪
♪ WHEN I'LL LOSE CONTROL

BLAME IT ON ME OOH ♪
♪ WHEN I'LL LOSE CONTROL
I KNOW I'LL GO

♪ WHEN I'LL LOSE CONTROL
I KNOW I'LL GO
BLAME IT ON ME OOH ♪

I KNOW I'LL GO
BLAME IT ON ME OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

BLAME IT ON ME OOH ♪
♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

♪ WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪

WHAT YOU WAITING FOR
NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪

NO WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪
♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
[ BUZZER ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
[ BUZZER ]
>>> MR. LANGLEY, I'M AGENT

[ BUZZER ]
>>> MR. LANGLEY, I'M AGENT
BARNES.

>>> MR. LANGLEY, I'M AGENT
BARNES.
THIS IS AGENT DUNWITTY.

BARNES.
THIS IS AGENT DUNWITTY.
SO, WE'VE CERTAINLY BEEN BUSY,

THIS IS AGENT DUNWITTY.
SO, WE'VE CERTAINLY BEEN BUSY,
HAVEN'T WE?

SO, WE'VE CERTAINLY BEEN BUSY,
HAVEN'T WE?
>> I WANT MY LAWYER.

HAVEN'T WE?
>> I WANT MY LAWYER.
>> WE'LL GET TO THAT.

>> I WANT MY LAWYER.
>> WE'LL GET TO THAT.
>> WHERE IS MY LAWYER.

>> WE'LL GET TO THAT.
>> WHERE IS MY LAWYER.
>> COOL OUT HOTBALL!

>> WHERE IS MY LAWYER.
>> COOL OUT HOTBALL!
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> COOL OUT HOTBALL!
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> FIRST, LET ME REVIEW SOME OF

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> FIRST, LET ME REVIEW SOME OF
YOUR ORGANIZATIONS

>> FIRST, LET ME REVIEW SOME OF
YOUR ORGANIZATIONS
ACCOMPLISHMENTS.

YOUR ORGANIZATIONS
ACCOMPLISHMENTS.
DRUG TRAFFICKING, ILLEGAL ARMS

ACCOMPLISHMENTS.
DRUG TRAFFICKING, ILLEGAL ARMS
DEALINGS, SHOULD I KEEP READING?

DRUG TRAFFICKING, ILLEGAL ARMS
DEALINGS, SHOULD I KEEP READING?
>> I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING.

DEALINGS, SHOULD I KEEP READING?
>> I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING.
>> THAT LIE IS SO BIG IT COULD

>> I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING.
>> THAT LIE IS SO BIG IT COULD
FIT IN A BOX THAT COULD HOLD A

>> THAT LIE IS SO BIG IT COULD
FIT IN A BOX THAT COULD HOLD A
MILLION HATS.

FIT IN A BOX THAT COULD HOLD A
MILLION HATS.
[ LAUGHTER ]

MILLION HATS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NOW, AS FASCINATING AS YOU

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> NOW, AS FASCINATING AS YOU
ARE, MR. LANGLEY, WE'RE FAR MORE

>> NOW, AS FASCINATING AS YOU
ARE, MR. LANGLEY, WE'RE FAR MORE
INTERESTED IN YOUR BOSS,

ARE, MR. LANGLEY, WE'RE FAR MORE
INTERESTED IN YOUR BOSS,
EDDIE CALDERON.

INTERESTED IN YOUR BOSS,
EDDIE CALDERON.
>> NEVER HEARD OF THE GUY.

EDDIE CALDERON.
>> NEVER HEARD OF THE GUY.
>> OH, YOU WANT TO PLAY GAMES?

>> NEVER HEARD OF THE GUY.
>> OH, YOU WANT TO PLAY GAMES?
YOU GO AHEAD, WE'RE NOT GOING

>> OH, YOU WANT TO PLAY GAMES?
YOU GO AHEAD, WE'RE NOT GOING
ANYWHERE, AND I HAVE TO PEE

YOU GO AHEAD, WE'RE NOT GOING
ANYWHERE, AND I HAVE TO PEE
RIGHT NOW, BUT I CAN HOLD IT ALL

ANYWHERE, AND I HAVE TO PEE
RIGHT NOW, BUT I CAN HOLD IT ALL
DAY.

RIGHT NOW, BUT I CAN HOLD IT ALL
DAY.
ALL DAY.

DAY.
ALL DAY.
ONE TIME I HELD IT THROUGH AN

ALL DAY.
ONE TIME I HELD IT THROUGH AN
ENTIRE PRODUCTION OF RENT WITH

ONE TIME I HELD IT THROUGH AN
ENTIRE PRODUCTION OF RENT WITH
THE ORIGINAL CAST.

ENTIRE PRODUCTION OF RENT WITH
THE ORIGINAL CAST.
[ LAUGHTER ]

THE ORIGINAL CAST.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OKAY, COULD YOU JUST, YOU CAN

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> OKAY, COULD YOU JUST, YOU CAN
EITHER COOPERATE OR CONTINUE TO

>> OKAY, COULD YOU JUST, YOU CAN
EITHER COOPERATE OR CONTINUE TO
PLAY DUMB.

EITHER COOPERATE OR CONTINUE TO
PLAY DUMB.
I SUGGEST YOU CHOSE THE FORMER.

PLAY DUMB.
I SUGGEST YOU CHOSE THE FORMER.
>> OR HOW ABOUT YOU GIVE ME A

I SUGGEST YOU CHOSE THE FORMER.
>> OR HOW ABOUT YOU GIVE ME A
KISS WITH THOSE PRETTY RED LIPS.

>> OR HOW ABOUT YOU GIVE ME A
KISS WITH THOSE PRETTY RED LIPS.
>> SHE WOULD NEVER KISS YOU.

KISS WITH THOSE PRETTY RED LIPS.
>> SHE WOULD NEVER KISS YOU.
SHE'S DATING A GUY NAMED JEFF

>> SHE WOULD NEVER KISS YOU.
SHE'S DATING A GUY NAMED JEFF
AND HE'S THE BEST.

SHE'S DATING A GUY NAMED JEFF
AND HE'S THE BEST.
[ LAUGHTER ]

AND HE'S THE BEST.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> MR. LANGLEY YOU ARE IN NO

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> MR. LANGLEY YOU ARE IN NO
POSITION TO PLAY GAMES.

>> MR. LANGLEY YOU ARE IN NO
POSITION TO PLAY GAMES.
>> I'M NOT PLAYING ANY GAMES.

POSITION TO PLAY GAMES.
>> I'M NOT PLAYING ANY GAMES.
I'M AN INNOCENT MAN.

>> I'M NOT PLAYING ANY GAMES.
I'M AN INNOCENT MAN.
>> DO YOU REALLY EXPECT US TO

I'M AN INNOCENT MAN.
>> DO YOU REALLY EXPECT US TO
STAND HERE AND FOLLOW THE YELLOW

>> DO YOU REALLY EXPECT US TO
STAND HERE AND FOLLOW THE YELLOW
BRICK LIES?

STAND HERE AND FOLLOW THE YELLOW
BRICK LIES?
[ LAUGHTER ]

BRICK LIES?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'D LIKE SOME WATER, PLEASE.

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'D LIKE SOME WATER, PLEASE.
>> DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A

>> I'D LIKE SOME WATER, PLEASE.
>> DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A
GORGEOUS CHEESECAKE FACTORY TO

>> DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A
GORGEOUS CHEESECAKE FACTORY TO
YOU?

GORGEOUS CHEESECAKE FACTORY TO
YOU?
>> NO, IT LOOKS LIKE AN

YOU?
>> NO, IT LOOKS LIKE AN
INTERROGATION ROOM, SO WHERE'S

>> NO, IT LOOKS LIKE AN
INTERROGATION ROOM, SO WHERE'S
MY WATER.

INTERROGATION ROOM, SO WHERE'S
MY WATER.
>> IT'S IN THE WATER LIKE YOUR

MY WATER.
>> IT'S IN THE WATER LIKE YOUR
HOUSE IS.

>> IT'S IN THE WATER LIKE YOUR
HOUSE IS.
>> EXCUSE ME?

HOUSE IS.
>> EXCUSE ME?
>> YOUR EMPLOYER, HELP US GET

>> EXCUSE ME?
>> YOUR EMPLOYER, HELP US GET
CALDERON, AND WE PLAY BE ABLE TO

>> YOUR EMPLOYER, HELP US GET
CALDERON, AND WE PLAY BE ABLE TO
GET SOMETHING TO WORK OUT FOR

CALDERON, AND WE PLAY BE ABLE TO
GET SOMETHING TO WORK OUT FOR
YOU.

GET SOMETHING TO WORK OUT FOR
YOU.
>> WEARING THAT BLOUSE, I CAN

YOU.
>> WEARING THAT BLOUSE, I CAN
KIND OF SEE DOWN YOUR SHIRT.

>> WEARING THAT BLOUSE, I CAN
KIND OF SEE DOWN YOUR SHIRT.
>> IDIOT, SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND,

KIND OF SEE DOWN YOUR SHIRT.
>> IDIOT, SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND,
REMEMBER.

>> IDIOT, SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND,
REMEMBER.
AND JEFF IS THE COOLEST AND HIS

REMEMBER.
AND JEFF IS THE COOLEST AND HIS
SNACKS ARE THE BEST.

AND JEFF IS THE COOLEST AND HIS
SNACKS ARE THE BEST.
YOU WOULD NEVER GET INVITED TO

SNACKS ARE THE BEST.
YOU WOULD NEVER GET INVITED TO
JEFF'S.

YOU WOULD NEVER GET INVITED TO
JEFF'S.
NOT NOW, NOT EVER, DON'T THINK

JEFF'S.
NOT NOW, NOT EVER, DON'T THINK
ABOUT ASKING.

NOT NOW, NOT EVER, DON'T THINK
ABOUT ASKING.
>> WHY SO MUCH JEFF STUFF.

ABOUT ASKING.
>> WHY SO MUCH JEFF STUFF.
>> OKAY, WELL, WE HAVE YOUR

>> WHY SO MUCH JEFF STUFF.
>> OKAY, WELL, WE HAVE YOUR
ASSOCIATE IN THE NEXT ROOM, AND

>> OKAY, WELL, WE HAVE YOUR
ASSOCIATE IN THE NEXT ROOM, AND
HE SEEMS VERY INTERESTED IN

ASSOCIATE IN THE NEXT ROOM, AND
HE SEEMS VERY INTERESTED IN
SELLING YOU OUT TO PROTECT

HE SEEMS VERY INTERESTED IN
SELLING YOU OUT TO PROTECT
YOURSELF, SO WE'LL GO PAY HIM A

SELLING YOU OUT TO PROTECT
YOURSELF, SO WE'LL GO PAY HIM A
LITTLE VISIT.

YOURSELF, SO WE'LL GO PAY HIM A
LITTLE VISIT.
>> BARNES, JUST LET ME HAVE A

LITTLE VISIT.
>> BARNES, JUST LET ME HAVE A
MINUTE, LET ME HAVE A TALK

>> BARNES, JUST LET ME HAVE A
MINUTE, LET ME HAVE A TALK
REALLY QUICK WITH THIS GUY.

MINUTE, LET ME HAVE A TALK
REALLY QUICK WITH THIS GUY.
>> NO, I THINK --

REALLY QUICK WITH THIS GUY.
>> NO, I THINK --
>> HEY, THERE, LOONEY TUNE.

>> NO, I THINK --
>> HEY, THERE, LOONEY TUNE.
>> HOW AM I A LOONEY TUNE.

>> HEY, THERE, LOONEY TUNE.
>> HOW AM I A LOONEY TUNE.
>> SAID THE BIGGEST LOONEY TUNE

>> HOW AM I A LOONEY TUNE.
>> SAID THE BIGGEST LOONEY TUNE
I'VE EVER SEEN.

>> SAID THE BIGGEST LOONEY TUNE
I'VE EVER SEEN.
>> OKAY.

I'VE EVER SEEN.
>> OKAY.
>> NO ONE TOLD YOU YOUR LIFE WAS

>> OKAY.
>> NO ONE TOLD YOU YOUR LIFE WAS
GOING TO BE THIS WAY?

>> NO ONE TOLD YOU YOUR LIFE WAS
GOING TO BE THIS WAY?
♪ AND NOW YOUR JOB'S A JOKE AND

GOING TO BE THIS WAY?
♪ AND NOW YOUR JOB'S A JOKE AND
YOU'RE BROKE AND YOUR LOVE

♪ AND NOW YOUR JOB'S A JOKE AND
YOU'RE BROKE AND YOUR LOVE
LIFE'S DOA ♪

YOU'RE BROKE AND YOUR LOVE
LIFE'S DOA ♪
♪ IT'S LIKE YOU'RE ALWAYS STUCK

LIFE'S DOA ♪
♪ IT'S LIKE YOU'RE ALWAYS STUCK
IN SECOND GEAR ♪

♪ IT'S LIKE YOU'RE ALWAYS STUCK
IN SECOND GEAR ♪
[ LAUGHTER ]

IN SECOND GEAR ♪
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YEAH, THAT'S CLEARLY THE

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YEAH, THAT'S CLEARLY THE
FRIENDS THEME SONG.

>> YEAH, THAT'S CLEARLY THE
FRIENDS THEME SONG.
>> FRIENDS.

FRIENDS THEME SONG.
>> FRIENDS.
IT'S FRIENDS, WHICH IS WHAT YOU

>> FRIENDS.
IT'S FRIENDS, WHICH IS WHAT YOU
AND JEFF WILL NEVER BE.

IT'S FRIENDS, WHICH IS WHAT YOU
AND JEFF WILL NEVER BE.
>> ENOUGH ABOUT JEFF.

AND JEFF WILL NEVER BE.
>> ENOUGH ABOUT JEFF.
I'LL TALK, BUT I WANT FULL

>> ENOUGH ABOUT JEFF.
I'LL TALK, BUT I WANT FULL
IMMUNITY, AND I'LL ONLY TALK TO

I'LL TALK, BUT I WANT FULL
IMMUNITY, AND I'LL ONLY TALK TO
HER AND NOT THIS GUY.

IMMUNITY, AND I'LL ONLY TALK TO
HER AND NOT THIS GUY.
>> I THINK WE CAN MAKE THAT

HER AND NOT THIS GUY.
>> I THINK WE CAN MAKE THAT
WORK.

>> I THINK WE CAN MAKE THAT
WORK.
>> GREAT, GREAT, GREAT, I'M

WORK.
>> GREAT, GREAT, GREAT, I'M
GOING TO GO GRAB A TAPE RECORDER

>> GREAT, GREAT, GREAT, I'M
GOING TO GO GRAB A TAPE RECORDER
YOU SIT THERE AND WATCH YOUR NEW

GOING TO GO GRAB A TAPE RECORDER
YOU SIT THERE AND WATCH YOUR NEW
FAVORITE TV SHOW CALLED THE

YOU SIT THERE AND WATCH YOUR NEW
FAVORITE TV SHOW CALLED THE
WALL.

FAVORITE TV SHOW CALLED THE
WALL.
>> SERIOUSLY, QUIT WHILE YOU'RE

WALL.
>> SERIOUSLY, QUIT WHILE YOU'RE
AHEAD.

>> SERIOUSLY, QUIT WHILE YOU'RE
AHEAD.
>> YEAH, I KNOW.

AHEAD.
>> YEAH, I KNOW.
CAUSE ♪

>> YEAH, I KNOW.
CAUSE ♪
I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU ♪

CAUSE ♪
I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU ♪
[ APPLAUSE ]

I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU ♪
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> DAREDEVIL STUNTS MAKE YOUR

[ APPLAUSE ]
>> DAREDEVIL STUNTS MAKE YOUR
JAW DROP, CLOWNS WITH FUNNY

>> DAREDEVIL STUNTS MAKE YOUR
JAW DROP, CLOWNS WITH FUNNY
FACES AND ANIMALS WALKING AROUND

JAW DROP, CLOWNS WITH FUNNY
FACES AND ANIMALS WALKING AROUND
ACTING WILD.

FACES AND ANIMALS WALKING AROUND
ACTING WILD.
AND SOMETIMES SWEET.

ACTING WILD.
AND SOMETIMES SWEET.
IT'S THE CIRCUS.

AND SOMETIMES SWEET.
IT'S THE CIRCUS.
LET'S TALK TO SOME PEOPLE AND

IT'S THE CIRCUS.
LET'S TALK TO SOME PEOPLE AND
SEE WHAT IT REALLY IS, THE MOST

LET'S TALK TO SOME PEOPLE AND
SEE WHAT IT REALLY IS, THE MOST
FUN THEY'VE EVER HAD.

SEE WHAT IT REALLY IS, THE MOST
FUN THEY'VE EVER HAD.
HEY I'M ABOUT -- I'M GOING TO

FUN THEY'VE EVER HAD.
HEY I'M ABOUT -- I'M GOING TO
HAVE FUN DOING THIS RUN.

HEY I'M ABOUT -- I'M GOING TO
HAVE FUN DOING THIS RUN.
♪

HAVE FUN DOING THIS RUN.
♪
READY FOR THE CIRCUS TO COME

♪
READY FOR THE CIRCUS TO COME
INTO TOWN?

READY FOR THE CIRCUS TO COME
INTO TOWN?
>> YES.

INTO TOWN?
>> YES.
>> WHAT'S, WHAT'S, WHAT'S --

>> YES.
>> WHAT'S, WHAT'S, WHAT'S --
WHAT'S THE ONE PART --

>> WHAT'S, WHAT'S, WHAT'S --
WHAT'S THE ONE PART --
>> WHAT ARE YOU HERE MAINLY TO

WHAT'S THE ONE PART --
>> WHAT ARE YOU HERE MAINLY TO
SEE?

>> WHAT ARE YOU HERE MAINLY TO
SEE?
>> WHAT?

SEE?
>> WHAT?
>> THE CIRCUS.

>> WHAT?
>> THE CIRCUS.
>> YEAH, I KNOW, THE CIRCUS, BUT

>> THE CIRCUS.
>> YEAH, I KNOW, THE CIRCUS, BUT
WHAT PART OF THE CIRCUS.

>> YEAH, I KNOW, THE CIRCUS, BUT
WHAT PART OF THE CIRCUS.
>> I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT PART OF THE CIRCUS.
>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PART OF

>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PART OF
THE CIRCUS?

>> WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PART OF
THE CIRCUS?
>> I DON'T KNOW.

THE CIRCUS?
>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> WHAT DID YOU LIKE BEFORE?

>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> WHAT DID YOU LIKE BEFORE?
LIKE WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG.

>> WHAT DID YOU LIKE BEFORE?
LIKE WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG.
>> I DON'T KNOW?

LIKE WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG.
>> I DON'T KNOW?
>> NOW YOU'RE AN OLD MAN.

>> I DON'T KNOW?
>> NOW YOU'RE AN OLD MAN.
>> IT'S OKAY.

>> NOW YOU'RE AN OLD MAN.
>> IT'S OKAY.
>> SOME THINGS ARE BETTER NOT TO

>> IT'S OKAY.
>> SOME THINGS ARE BETTER NOT TO
GET INVOLVED IN.

>> SOME THINGS ARE BETTER NOT TO
GET INVOLVED IN.
♪

GET INVOLVED IN.
♪
>> IT'S LIKE WATCHING A --

♪
>> IT'S LIKE WATCHING A --
>> IT'S LIKE WATCHING A CIRCUS.

>> IT'S LIKE WATCHING A --
>> IT'S LIKE WATCHING A CIRCUS.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> IT'S LIKE WATCHING A CIRCUS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
♪

[ LAUGHTER ]
♪
>> YOU COULD BE ONE OF THE MOST

♪
>> YOU COULD BE ONE OF THE MOST
DARING FLIGHT OF THE NIGHT PIXIE

>> YOU COULD BE ONE OF THE MOST
DARING FLIGHT OF THE NIGHT PIXIE
CLOWNS, THE REST OF THE NIGHT.

DARING FLIGHT OF THE NIGHT PIXIE
CLOWNS, THE REST OF THE NIGHT.
>> NOT REALLY.

CLOWNS, THE REST OF THE NIGHT.
>> NOT REALLY.
I NEVER REALLY THOUGHT OF IT

>> NOT REALLY.
I NEVER REALLY THOUGHT OF IT
THAT WAY.

I NEVER REALLY THOUGHT OF IT
THAT WAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]

THAT WAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
♪

[ LAUGHTER ]
♪
>> WE WERE THINKING MAYBE SOME

♪
>> WE WERE THINKING MAYBE SOME
DAY WE'D SEE YOU UP THERE.

>> WE WERE THINKING MAYBE SOME
DAY WE'D SEE YOU UP THERE.
>> I WOULD BE ABLE TO GO UP

DAY WE'D SEE YOU UP THERE.
>> I WOULD BE ABLE TO GO UP
THERE ONE DAY.

>> I WOULD BE ABLE TO GO UP
THERE ONE DAY.
>> I THINK YOU GOT IT IN YOU, IN

THERE ONE DAY.
>> I THINK YOU GOT IT IN YOU, IN
FACT, WE ARE ALL ROOTING FOR

>> I THINK YOU GOT IT IN YOU, IN
FACT, WE ARE ALL ROOTING FOR
YOU.

FACT, WE ARE ALL ROOTING FOR
YOU.
>> I DOUBT THAT.

YOU.
>> I DOUBT THAT.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> I DOUBT THAT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> IS THIS A MICROPHONE?

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> IS THIS A MICROPHONE?
>> YES.

>> IS THIS A MICROPHONE?
>> YES.
>> OH.

>> YES.
>> OH.
>> LET HIM HOLD IT, AND YOU JUST

>> OH.
>> LET HIM HOLD IT, AND YOU JUST
TALK.

>> LET HIM HOLD IT, AND YOU JUST
TALK.
>> THEY'RE KIND OF LATCH FOR

TALK.
>> THEY'RE KIND OF LATCH FOR
FRESH ON HIM.

>> THEY'RE KIND OF LATCH FOR
FRESH ON HIM.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

FRESH ON HIM.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
>> THAT'S A WAYS FROM NOW.

>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
>> THAT'S A WAYS FROM NOW.
>> LOOKS LIKE YOU GOT THE

>> THAT'S A WAYS FROM NOW.
>> LOOKS LIKE YOU GOT THE
PREMIUM STRINGS OVER THERE.

>> LOOKS LIKE YOU GOT THE
PREMIUM STRINGS OVER THERE.
>> I DON'T WANT TO.

PREMIUM STRINGS OVER THERE.
>> I DON'T WANT TO.
[ LAUGHTER ]

>> I DON'T WANT TO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'M LOOKING AT YOU AND ABOUT

[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'M LOOKING AT YOU AND ABOUT
MOVING A MILE A MINUTE.

>> I'M LOOKING AT YOU AND ABOUT
MOVING A MILE A MINUTE.
>> I JUST KEEP ON GOING.

MOVING A MILE A MINUTE.
>> I JUST KEEP ON GOING.
I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY.

>> I JUST KEEP ON GOING.
I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY.
YEAH, IT'S GREAT.

I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY.
YEAH, IT'S GREAT.
>>> I HAVE TO THANK THIS MAN,

YEAH, IT'S GREAT.
>>> I HAVE TO THANK THIS MAN,
GEORGE EZRA.

>>> I HAVE TO THANK THIS MAN,
GEORGE EZRA.
FOR HIS PERFORMANCE.

GEORGE EZRA.
FOR HIS PERFORMANCE.
I WANT TO THANK LORNE MICHAELS,

FOR HIS PERFORMANCE.
I WANT TO THANK LORNE MICHAELS,
THE AMAZING GUEST PARTNER.

I WANT TO THANK LORNE MICHAELS,
THE AMAZING GUEST PARTNER.
YOU GUYS, AMAZING CAST.

THE AMAZING GUEST PARTNER.
YOU GUYS, AMAZING CAST.
I WANT TO THANK ALL OF YOU GUYS.

YOU GUYS, AMAZING CAST.
I WANT TO THANK ALL OF YOU GUYS.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.

I WANT TO THANK ALL OF YOU GUYS.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
........