Sabrina's Secret Life (2003–2004): Season 1, Episode 25 - Witchycology - full transcript

Sabrina and Maritza unsuccessfully try to convince Cassandra that littering isn't cool. The trash in Greendale is so bad, that these "best friends for life" get their favorite skateboard star, Ricky Speed, to come perform and clean up the pollution. Ricky and Maritza together perform a tricky stunt until a windy gust caused by Cassandra requires a heroic rescue by Ricky (with a little help from Sabrina's magic). Ricky is so impressed with Maritza that he gives her his special skateboard necklace. Disgusted, Cassandra goes to the Netherworld to see the Hey Mogoblin skateboard show with another teen witch, Olivia. Here, throwing trash is really cool. As it turns out, Olivia and Hey Mogoblin have evil plans to conquer the Netherworld! During the show, they use chemicals to turn all the witches and warlocks to stone-including Cassandra! Sabrina's got to do something! Since Maritza is mortal and won't be turned to stone, Sabrina takes her along (Maritza thinks it's a dream) to end the duo's fiendish rule. When Hey sees Maritza's skate necklace, he tells of his deep admiration for Ricky. When the girls explain that Ricky would NOT think it was cool to use pollution and trash to take over the Netherworld, he agrees to help clean up. Olivia refuses to help and is angry because the other witches never liked her. Maritza explains that nobody is liked all the time, and that being disliked doesn't give anyone the right to act out in hostility. Olivia tries to turn everyone to stone, but Sabrina uses a reflexive spell that turns just Olivia to stone. The Netherworld gets cleaned and the three teenage girls return safely to earth, for now...

♪ Who's making magic, making
magic, making magic ♪

♪ Who's making magic, making
magic, making magic ♪

♪ What's going on here,
something's not right ♪

♪ Who's making magic
now every night ♪

♪ Witch Training lessons
till the mornin' light ♪

♪ Living Sabrina's
Secret Life. ♪

♪ Who's making magic
Who's making magic ♪

♪ Who's making magic
Sabrina's Secret Life! ♪

♪ Witch training lessons
now every night ♪

♪ Sabrina's Secret Life! ♪

All right, Sabrina,
you're just like Ricky Speed!



Check out his signature move.

[strained grunt]

Wow!

[laughing]

You're like, so
athletically challenged.

Am not.

It's a hard trick!

Don't do that!

Do what?

Littering.

It's not cool.

What would you know
about being cool?

[sniggering]

I know that Ricky
Speed wouldn't litter.



He's, like a loser.

The only real cool
skater is Hey Mogoblin...

he's so, out of this world,
and he doesn't care about

stuff like that.

How come I never heard of him?

Duh, like you're
not cool enough.

If being cool means
you have to litter,

count me out.

Like I would ever
consider counting you in.

And if you want to see
cool, then stand back.

This is a trick Hey
Mogoblin taught me...

[strained grunt]

I'd say, see you
later, but I don't want to.

Yeah?

Well pick up your trash!

You do it!

We should get
Ricky to come to town.

I'm sure he's a
busy guy, Maritza.

He's got his skater tours,
and the charity stuff he does.

We'll write a letter...

better yet, we'll have people
sign a petition to get him to

come to town as
a charity thing!

It can be a clean
up Greendale event!

I think that's a
great idea, Maritza.

Ricky is cool, and he does
lots of benefits and stuff,

and I can have my aunts
help us send the letter...

they have a way of
getting things noticed!

Then let's do it!

[sniffs air]

Wow!

Smells good.

Okay, next one.

Dear Mr. Speed,
my friends and I...

blah, blah, blah, blah...

biggest fans.

Pollution problem!?!

Erin, Crease.

Cancel Rio.

I've gotta make an
appearance in Greendale!

I don't know where it
is, that's what you're for!

This town needs my help!

[oohs and ahhs]

[cheers]

So it's not only me...

a way cool famous skater guy,
who can help stop litter and

pollution, but you too.

Just like my new
friends, Sabrina and Maritza.

[screaming with joy]

He said our names!

He's soooo awesome, Sabrina.

He's double, triple,
quadruple awesome!

Girls, to show my appreciation
for getting me out here to

help with such a good cause,
I'm gonna teach you how to

ride the half-pipe.

Cool!

Hey Mogoblin wouldn't
care about trash...

he'd just want to skate...

Rats.

I'm better than they are...

Who wants to go first?

I think that Maritza should.

Without her, you
wouldn't be here.

It was all her idea.

Well, okay then.

Put on your
helmet, and let's rock!

[cheers]

Let's see how a little
more wind shakes things up.

Wind from the
night, wind from the day,

pick up the pace!

Blow Maritza away!

You're doing great!

Ready to go again?

Are you kidding me?

Hey, Sabrina, watch me!

[strained grunt]

Help!

Whoooooaaa!

[gasp]

Whoooooaaa!

Oh no!

Wow, this is a first!

Whooooaaaaa!

Oh, hissysnakes, I
guess I have to save her.

Summer breeze, knock knees...

no, that won't work.

Uhmmm.

Up and over,
four leaf clover...

Argh!

Why did Maritza
have to mess this up?!

Whooooa!

Help!

This is so bad!

Help!

[fearful cries]

Please let this
work -- please!

Maritza is in
serious trouble.

Send Ricky to help
her, on the double.

[cheers]

Maritza, I never saw
anyone do a trick like that!

That was so totally cool!

Thanks Ricky,
neither have I...

Oh man, I'm so
glad you're okay!

[Cassandra:] Nice misuse of your
powers, Smellman.

I did it to save Maritza,
and you should be happy,

otherwise, you'd have a lot of
explaining to do to Mr. Snipe

about the "sudden
wind" that crept up.

It was an accident.

I suppose this trash was, too.

What's the big deal?

It's just some
papers and stuff.

About a hundred
million "papers and stuff."

Hey, Sabrina, you get us
another volunteer to help

clean up this place?

I know you don't mean me.

For sure...

we're all sharing
this on this planet,

so we gotta pitch in...

keep it clean.

Yeah, well I'm going to have
some fun with a real skater,

Hey Mogoblin.

I've been personally invited
by someone very powerful to

attend his
skateboarding event.

Never heard of him.

I'm sure he's never
heard of you either.

Aren't you
forgetting something?

I'll stop the wind, but
the rest is up to you.

Later Smellman!

Olivia, thanks
for inviting me!

Well, Hey
Mogoblin said, Olivia,

come to my skate show
and bring a friend,

so natch I thought of you.

Wow, thanks.

I didn't think that we were
really good friends back when

I lived here.

Well, sure we were...

you sort of
picked on me a lot,

said I was a
really lousy witch,

but hey, friends
do that, right?

Come on, let's go.

[laughing and cheering]

Hey!

Uh...

Aahh!

Oh, this is my favorite...

I-I taught him this trick.

[cheers]

It's so cool...

so anti-establishment.

Clean up your room,
pick up after yourself...

Wash your hands
before you eat!

Brush your teeth
after every meal!

Wow, Olivia, you're like, a
lot cooler than I remember...

[laughs]

[crying]

Awesome work, guys!

Maritza, your idea to have
Ricky help us out was genius!

I do a lot of these
events, but this one was

by far the coolest.

Your moves on the
board were out there.

I-I want to give you something
to show my appreciation.

[gasp]

Remember, it's easier taking
care of your world in the

first place than trying to fix
stuff after you mess it up.

So do you want to
meet Hey Mogoblin?

Do I?

That would be sooo cool.

Okay, but you have to
let me hold your wand.

Hey is kind of leery of
witches he doesn't know.

My wand?

No way.

Okay...

well maybe we can put some sort
of protection spell on you...

gosh, I wonder if
you could do it?

What?

I could do it in my sleep.

You were the
lousy witch, not me.

Right, sure.

Maybe you better
try one on me first,

just to be safe.

Okay, how about a spell
that protects me from...

oh I don't know...

[laughing]

How about toxic waste.

Whatever.

Create a major
spell post haste:

Protect Olivia
from toxic waste.

Allow no other
to have a shield.

When the toxic waste
is at last revealed.

So, how are we going to
know if this spell works?

Not that I doubt it would...

Oh, we'll find a way.

Look, I can take
care of myself.

Goblins don't scare me.

That's right.

You're Cassandra.

Come on, help me with these.

What are those?

Part of Hey's big finale.

Help me get them to him.

One at a time, one at a time.

You'll all get my
autograph, don't worry.

Hey, Hey.

This is Cassandra...

the witch I was
telling you about.

The witch with attitude?

Cool.

Hey Mogoblin...

all Netherworld pro skater.

I'm Cassandra,
Enchantra's niece.

I know.

Thanks for helping.

What exactly are you
going to do with this stuff?

It's a really cool skate show.

Lots of different types of
canisters and lots of colors.

They're sort of like flares...

but they really
trash the place.

Cool.

You want one of your own?

Yeah!

Well, don't use it
until I give you the word.

On my cue.

This place won't
know what hit it.

You guys take a
couple and skate around...

and we'll really change the
color of the Netherworld!

Hello,
Netherworld goblin horde!

Today, I have a
special treat for you,

a special show that
will rock the Netherworld.

Follow me, and do what I do!

[excited squeals]

All right!

[scared wail]

W-What's happening to me?

Wheee!

All right, here we go.

This is fun!

[laughs]

Bye Ricky!

See ya!

What a great day.

We helped clean
up Greendale...

And you got a
necklace from Ricky Speed!

[squealing with delight]

How cool!

Nothing can ruin this day!

Sabrina, I need
to speak to you...

Alone!

Excuse us please, Maritza.

Is everything okay?

I don't know, Sabrina.

I got an urgent message from a
friend in the Netherworld...

it seems the magic is dying.

How?

I'm getting to that...

a goblin skateboarder has used
some sort of pollution that

affects only
witches and warlocks.

He's trying to take
over the Netherworld!

Oh, no!

Cassandra's there!

If someone doesn't
get there and stop it,

the Netherworld will be
gone, and so will she!

I have to go get her!

Impossible.

The pollution is crippling
all witches and warlocks!

For once, I think being a
half-witch is going to be an

advantage.

If this pollution only
harms witches and warlocks,

then maybe I'll be okay.

But Sabrina, I can't
send you there alone.

Mr. Snipe and I can't go.

I've got it!

Maritza can come with me.

She's all mortal, and if
there is pollution there,

she'll know what
to do with it.

Maybe...

It's our only
option, Ms. Magrooney.

Okay, we'll do it
just this once.

But I'll use a "Return to
Sender" spell to bring you

back just in case
you run in to trouble.

Magic on this end
won't be affected.

I'll never forget
this, until the day I die,

Ricky Speed giving
me this necklace.

[sigh]

Maybe I can grow up
to be Mrs. Ricky Speed?

Well, I want to give
you something special,

too, for being my best friend.

It's called a "Return
to Sender" bracelet.

Where ever we are, we'll
always come home again.

Wow!

Oh, thanks, Sabrina!

It's amazing!

All this and a sleepover!

I'm so excited.

I hope I'll be able
to sleep tonight!

I can help with that.

Star light, star
bright: bring Maritza to the

Netherworld, through
the sleep of the night.

[yawns]

Wow, I'm
suddenly really tired.

I hope I dream of Ricky.

You'll dream...

but it won't be of Ricky.

Wow, what a cool dream!

Sabrina, what are
you doing here?

I'm in your dream
to help you solve

this world's pollution problem.

Okay...

Hey, wait a minute...

isn't that...

Cassandra?

What a weird dream.

Ow!

Stop that!

Who said that?

I did, you lame brain!

That's Cassandra, all right.

Of course it's me.

Do something!

We're trying.

What happened?

Why is everyone a statue?

Everyone's not a statue...

just witches and warlocks...

the goblins used some sort
of chemical to turn us into

stone.

Goblins!

Witches!

Oh, yeah...

this is just a dream.

Bring on the goblins!

Come on, Sabrina.

Let's go find
these goblin thingies.

Maritza, I think
we might want to...

Oh, nevermind, we'll
find them all right.

[grunts and groans]

No one can call me a
lousy witch anymore!

[grunt]

I will be the ruler
of the Netherworld!

I thought you said we would?

Oh, yeah, of course.

You told me that the magical
creatures were trying to get

rid of us, and the only way to
stop it was to stop them first.

Which is what we did, Hey.

Can you help me move these?

They're heavy.

How come you have
magic, and I don't?

Not that I'm jealous, but
it's my dream, you know.

I just do...

And if you
hadn't realized yet,

the reason we're here is to
figure out how to stop this

pollution that's
killing the magic.

What's this?

Let me see.

Ow!

[gasp]

I think we've found our
source for the pollution.

I hope I still
have my magic...

Thursday,
Wednesday, Tuesday, Monday;

I need a
chocolate banana sundae.

Oh no, it's
crippling my magic!

Maritza, you've gotta help me.

Hey, we can find the coolest
skater here and do a clean up

festival just like back home!

We clean up this pollution, and
everything is back to normal.

Take them!

What are you doing?

I've got orders from Queen
Olivia to hold all witches and

warlocks that
weren't turned to stone.

Who is Queen Olivia?

I am.

[gasp]

What's going on here?

This is my dream.

I want this to stop now!

I know a good
way to stop it...

[coughing]

That wasn't very nice.

Oh no!

Nothing happened to her!

She must be a
really powerful witch!

Throw them into the
pond of toxic waste!

Of course, my queen.

Hey wait a minute!

That's a Ricky Speed
skateboard necklace!

That's right.

And he gave it to me himself
for helping clean up our town.

I love Ricky Speed...

I've wanted to be like
him since I this big.

Well, Ricky wouldn't
think this is very cool...

all this trash, and using
pollution to take over the

Netherworld.

I only did it
because Olivia said...

Queen Olivia!

Queen Olivia said that the
magic creatures wanted to get

rid of us, so we should
get rid of them first.

And you believed that?

Of course he did,
because it's the truth!

Then how come
you're still around?

Because...

I'm...

I-I'm...

on their side.

And I'm really a goblin!

Well, I've
always felt like one.

All these witches
never liked me.

No one is liked all the time.

But that doesn't give you an
excuse to pollute the world.

Well, none of
that matters now,

because Hey is going to throw
you into the toxic waste pond!

You lied to me.

I told you what
you wanted to hear.

You've destroyed your world...

only the magic
creatures are hurt now...

but how long will it be before
you goblin looking thingies

join them?

I don't care
about any of that,

and neither does Hey, if he
knows what's good for him.

Ricky Speed would
never trash his world.

I can't do it.

Me and the goblins, we'll
help you clean this place up.

It's probably not too
late to reverse the effects.

Well, then, I guess I'll have
to turn you all into stone!

Cool...

My magic's coming back.

What was that spell I
learned in the Grey Area?

Oh, yeah!

We're rubber
and you're glue...

It bounces off us
and sticks on you!

Hey!

Oh no!

[wails]

[fearful squeals]

Cool!

It worked!

Well sort of...

I'm sorry about
what I did here.

If you'll forgive me, I'll get
all my goblin fans to help us

clean this place up.

Thanks, Hey.

My fingers!

Looks like the effects
will slowly wear off.

That means the Netherworld
will come back to normal soon.

Man, how do you
know all this stuff?

I know I'm
supposed to say thanks,

so, well, thanks...

Be quiet.

You'll wake up Maritza.

As if!

You can't even
take my apology!

I'm outta here.

Sabrina, I just had
the craziest dream...