Sabrina's Secret Life (2003–2004): Season 1, Episode 23 - Here's Looking at You - full transcript

Sabrina agrees to help Maritza with her science project but oversleeps and forgets. At the witches' academy, Sabrina and Cassandra meet a very frank magic mirror who insults and infuriates Cassandra. After class Maritza accidentally slams her failed project onto Cassandra's designer shirt, and as much as tells Sabrina that their friendship is over. When Cassandra hurries off to confront the mirror for its rudeness, Sabrina follows her sensing trouble. Upon seeing Sabrina, the mirror tells her what Cassandra REALLY thinks of her, and in a moment of rage Sabrina casts a spell that sends both girls through the mirror and into an alternate world- where everyone at Greendale High is a witch except for the two of them! All the students mock these former witches, especially Maritza who cruelly casts a spell that sends them flying into the swimming pool to everyone's great amusement. Cassandra is unwilling to work with Sabrina to find a solution and tries instead to reason with her old friends. Those same old friends turn her into a frog while Sabina makes her peace with Maritza, realizing that being a good friend is more important than anything. These two best friends are together again and jointly cast a spell that turns Cassandra back into a teenager. After the two misfits have learned what it's like to be without powers, the mirror allows them to go back to their own world. Sabrina rushes to apologize to the REAL Maritza and helps her make her science project better than ever!

♪Who's making
magic, making magic,
making magic♪

♪Who's making
magic, making magic,
making magic♪

♪What's going on here,
something's not right♪

♪Who's making magic now every
night♪

♪Witch Training lessons
till the mornin' light♪

♪Living Sabrina's Secret Life.

♪Who's making magic

♪Who's making magic

♪Who's making magic

♪Sabrina's Secret Life!

♪Witch training lessons now
every night♪



♪Sabrina's Secret Life!

Did you get the baking soda?

Yes, and I have the food
coloring and the soda bottle...

everything I need
for my project.

Even if I get it to erupt,
it will look like a zit,

not a volcano.

It's due tomorrow, Sabrina...

What am I gonna do?

Maritza, it's just a
silly science class volcano.

Add the baking powder to the
vinegar and it will erupt.

But-

Don't worry, Maritza.

I'll help you in the morning

You will? Oh, thanks,
Sabrina. You're the best!



Best Friends For Life, right?

Best Friends For Life.

(Alarm clock ring)

Huh?

8:05!

I set you for 7:00!

I overslept...

Oh, no!

I'm gonna be late!

Overslept and all is messed...

need a spell to
get me dressed.

Where is she?

She could have
at least called.

I'm not late, am I?

Oh no.

Oh, good.

Nice outfit.

Who put you together?

A clown?

Ahh!

Dressed in a hurry.

I gotta change.

You know the rules, Sabrina.

No unnecessary
magic at school.

But Mr. Snipe...

No exceptions.

Especially not for something
as ephemeral as fashion.

Now, ladies, if you will
give me your full attention,

we have a special
guest speaker today.

Let me introduce to
you, Magic Mirror.

Aahhh!

Oooh!

Yes, yes, I get
that all the time.

I can't go anywhere anymore...

tell me this, tell me
that, who am I going to marry,

blah, blah, blah...

Hehehe..

And then you put the baking
powder into the vinegar...

Like this...

well, it would be
like this if it fit.

Okay, Maritza.

Thanks for trying.

So I told Napolean to
reconsider Waterloo,

and you know
where that got me?

Locked in a trunk for a
hundred years before my genius

was discovered again.

Yes, you have a question?

Can you like, tell me
who I'm going to marry?

No.

Next question.

You, the one with the
interesting choice of

clothing.

During the British
occupation of...

Wait a minute.

You're that
half-witch, aren't you?

I've never met a
half-witch before.

Is it one half
versus the other?

Left side witch,
right side mortal?

Or, top half witch,
bottom have mortal?

Oh, please.

Do we have to
put up with this?

I mean, really, she's a
half-witch and I'm a full one.

You should be
asking me questions...

You're a full one, all right,
I just don't know what you're

filled with.

Mr. Snipe!

Hahaha!

Wasn't that the
coolest guest speaker ever?

Yeah, sure.

He wouldn't know
greatness if he saw it.

Why are you so mad?

'Cause he like,
totally insulted me.

Aahh!

Unff!

Sorry!

Aughh!

You big loser, look
what you've done!

This top was so expensive,
because it was designed by

somebody really,
really famous!

You're such a nobody!

Oh, great.

That just tops my day!

First I fail my
science project,

and now I get insulted by
someone who's not looking

where they're going because
they're talking to my former

best friend for life.

Wait!

Let's talk.

Why?

Because we're friends.

Friends help each other.

Friends keep promises.

Friends don't stand you
up when you need them.

Maritza!

I overslept and
forgot all about it!

I'm sorry!

You owe her an apology.

How could you be
so mean to her?

She didn't do it on purpose.

Look at my shirt and tell
me who's being mean to whom.

Hmmm.

Auuugh.

Well, if it isn't
the witch, full of...

Stuff it!

The name's Cassandra.

I want you to
apologize to her.

Making lots of friends, I see.

Before you got to class, she
was telling me that you're not

really a half witch,
more of a nano-witch...

she has more magic in her
pinkie than you do in your

whole body!

You're horrible!

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
set Cassandra up for a fall.

Aahhh!

Cassandra!

Auuguuhh!

AHHH!

Ahhhhhhh!

Ughhn!

Aooowww!

That was not funny, you know!

Look, I broke a nail!

And get off me!

Cassandra,
something seems different.

Things will really look
different when I get through

with him.

No, put that down.

Look around you.

This is not witch class.

It's kinda weird.

What?

What's going on?

Ladies.

Glad to see that you're
on time for a change.

Mr. Snipe?

That's Principal Snipe,
and don't you forget it,

young lady!

And that's a "fashion
don't" if ever I saw one...

excuse me...

We have a special
guest here for you today.

Yeah, we know.

A Magic Mirror, but he's
got an attitude problem.

Magic mirror?

Hehe.

Hardly.

No, ladies, today we have a
mortal coming in to teach you

how to interact in
the magic world.

Magic world?

Hello!

Wait a minute.

I came to this school to learn
how to hone my magic and to

deal with mortals.

Magic?

One must be a witch or
warlock to have magic.

What are you saying?

I'm a...

mortal?!

Can a mortal do this?

Passionate power of
plants and shrubs,

turn this mere
mortal into a grub!

That's very nice.

Hmmm.

When we do Shakespeare's
Hamlet you can audition for a

witch. Now let's get
down to business.

I'm outta here!

Hey!

Huh?

Huh?

Hahh!

This can't be happening!

Aahhh!

This is your fault!

Mine?

How?

You're the one who's always
saying how great your

magic is.

If it's so good,
get us out of here.

Hocus Pocus, fiddly fan, take
me and Sabrina home as fast as

you can!

Look, they're trying magic.

Haha!

Look, there's Maritza!

She'll help us.

Maybe I can help
you with that spell.

Or me.

No, I'll figure it out.

I'm not the best
witch here for nothing.

Like, what do you want?

Yeah, mortal.

Maritza, you have to help me.

You're beyond help.

You need to turn yourself
in to the fashion police.

Now, if not sooner.

Maritza, it's me, Sabrina.

We've been friends forever.

See, Best Friends For Life...

I don't know what
you're talking about.

You're a mortal.

You have to help
us, me and Cassandra,

to get home.

Back to where we came from.

Ooh, I can do that, all right.

Oh, thank you!

I take back all the mean
things I said about you!

Hubble bubbles,
toil and trouble,

take these two
where mortals belong,

and do it on the double.

Huh?

Ahhhh!!!!

Oops!

My bad!

Looks like my
magic's a bit off.

You go girl!

I'll get you for this!

Cassandra is wet
after taking a fall,

now make her float
as light as a ball.

Aahhh!

Unff!

Whooooaaa!

Ow!

Aaahhh!

Stop it!

I'm a witch, I tell you!

Put me down or I'll make sure
you have a bad hair day for

the rest of your life!

Hahahahaha!

Come on, guys stop it!

Auugh!

I can't believe you, Maritza.

Snipe: Girls! Put
that mortal down.

Is that the way a
witch is supposed to act?

Ohhh!

Whooooaaa!

Unff!

No, Principal Snipe.

All of you to my office, now.

I'm going to
call your parents.

Harvey Kinkle goes deep
with the game on the line...

Greendale needs a
touchdown to win...

TOUCHDOWN!

Oh yeah!

The crowd goes wild as Kinkle
makes a fingertip catch!

Oh, hey, Sabrina.

You're talking to me?

Well, yeah, as long
as nobody is around.

What is going on here?

Everything is so weird.

Tell me about it.

I've known you, like, forever,
but if coach found out I was

friends with a mortal, I
might not make the team.

But I'm not a
mortal, I'm a witch.

Really?

How come you never told me?

Because I can't...

or I couldn't.

And now my magic
doesn't work...

But wait...

I have to be a witch, don't I?

If I was a
half-witch back home,

then it's only logical that I
would be a half-witch here...

only it's the other half.

I don't follow.

But you're
giving me a headache!

Oh, Harvey, you're a genius!

Thank you!

Psst! Cassandra...

Cassandra.

What?

And how come I'm the
only one who got detention?

Maybe I can get
us out of here.

Sure you can.

I'm a full witch and my
magic doesn't work here.

Guess what?

My aunts are mortal now.

Everything is backwards.

Hahh!

That means my Aunt
Enchantra is mortal too.

True.

But I'm a half-witch...

so if I was half witch at home
then I should be a half witch

here!

You think?

Okay. We better hold
hands, because I don't

know how much power I have.

Yuck!

I have to hold your hands?

Just do it!

A Magic Mirror
threw us for a loop,

now send us home
now before we droop.

Nothing.

I think we're
stuck here forever!

I can't stay stuck here.

I have a life.

Not like you.

I have, like,
friends back home!

Who hate me here...

Maybe we have to figure
out how to be mortal?

Maybe this whole
thing is a lesson,

and the key that unlocks our
magic is about learning about

things we're not.

Look, you do what you want.

But I'm going to get Tiffany
and Margaux to help me get

back to being myself.

What exactly did you
want us to do again,

Cassandra?

Hello?

Anybody home?

We need to get back!

Get back where?

Oh, hi Maritza.

You really think
you're a witch,

don't you?

Half-witch, but yeah.

I was.

Before I fell
through that mirror.

I can't believe you
still wear that pendant.

You still wear yours.

I guess I do.

You know, when I
found out I was a witch,

it was the most
exciting day of my life.

Then the other witches said I
shouldn't be friends with a

mortal.

When I gave up our friendship,
it was the saddest.

I never should have put
something else before our

friendship.

You're probably not
going to believe this,

but, where I'm from, I'm
a witch and you're not.

No way!

Are we friends?

Well, I think, but I
did something stupid.

I put something
before our friendship.

I overslept and blew you off
to listen to an arrogant Magic

Mirror speak...

Hey!

Maybe you and I
were supposed to meet!

Maybe...

Best Friends For Life.

Best Friends For Life!

You know, I never even
knew that mirror was magic.

Let's find Cassandra
and get you two back.

We've been trying
to get her back...

But we don't remember
the reversal spell...

It's an improvement, but I
can't take her back like this.

Change her back, Maritza.

I don't know the
counter to that spell.

I've been working
on it for months,

but I never seem
to get it right.

It's okay, Maritza.

I know this one.

It's tricky, and it
took me a long time,

too, but it can be done.

Repeat it after me.

Warts, torts and
summer lore...

Warts, torts and
summer lore...

Ponds and wands let
friendship soar...

Ponds and wands let
friendship soar...

Reverse the
spell, make it well,

and set things as
they were before.

Reverse the
spell, make it well,

and set things as
they were before.

Ewww!

Gross!

A fly!

Teeheee!

Yuck!

I was afraid I was
going to eat that fly.

Sorry, you really are a witch.

Best Friends...

For Life...

Let's get you home.

You came through this mirror?

It doesn't seem very magical.

Try this.

Did you hear that?

I think it was laughing.

Or trying not to.

He's in there!

Let's get him out.

Hehehe.

Two can play at this game.

I can hit a high
"C" with my voice.

(singing)

Okay, okay I give.

Stop!

Hehh..

If you break him,
we'll never get back.

Why don't you try
apologizing to him?

He only did this
to get back at you!

Okay.

Listen up, Mr. Magic Mirror.

Let's call it a draw.

Oh, alright.

You guys are a drag.

Jump in.

Greendale
express departing now.

I hope we're still
friends when you get back.

I hope we're still
friends when I leave.

Wait!

I can't let you go
back looking like that...

Wish I may and wish I
might, don't let Sabrina

look a fright.

Thanks.

What are friends for?

Whooooa!

Unff!

Ughh!

It's good to be home.

Thank you for helping me
see how much my friends

mean to me.

Can I sit down?

It's a free world.

What are you doing?

Make up assignment
for science class.

Is there a make up
assignment for friends?

I'm sorry I forgot.

I put something else
before our friendship.

It was always
important to me, but today,

I guess I really
learned how much.

I could maybe understand
why you didn't show up,

but you acted like it
was so-- unimportant.

But I do care...

I really am sorry, and I
hope that you can forgive me.

Best Friends For Life?

Best Friends For Life.

What's the make up assignment?

Still a volcano...

but I was thinking about
making it more complex.

Instead of baking
powder and vinegar,

I was thinking of cheese so if
it blows up in my face again,

it tastes better.

Hahahaha!