Rugrats (2021-…): Season 1, Episode 4 - One Big Happy Family/The Last Balloon - full transcript

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[upbeat music]

[giggles]

- [hums]
- [laughs]

[whimpers]

[laughs]

♪ ♪

[yelps] [frog ribbits]

[both laugh]

[overlapping chatter]

♪ ♪

[toy car horn toots]



- Both: Whoa!
- Ta-da!

[screams] Whoa!

[laughs, whistles]

Whoa. Ah!

Aw!

♪ ♪

[munches loudly]

Reschedule my meeting
with the district attorney

to Friday,

and then reschedule my Friday
meeting to next Wednesday.

But then cancel it on Tuesday,

and make sure it sounds
like I'm really sorry.

Already rescheduled,
canceled, rescheduled again,

and preordered a tasteful
cookie cornucopia,



as an apology, but I really
have to go now, Charlotte.

Hey, Dante, save me a cabana!

Ugh! Two weeks' paid vacation.

So you're not going
to believe this,

but my dad's house needs to
be fumigated for bugs, and...

No, I believe it.

I might have told Stu
that they could stay here,

and maybe bunk in the
guest room, and...

Everyone's going to stay here?

Like a sleepover? Even Grandpa?

Yes, sweetie.

We're all one big, happy family.

You see, darling, that's
how being married works.

You must learn to
share everything.

[doorbell chimes] [phone beeps]

Hello. Anybody home?

I'll get it!

Welcome to Angelica's house!

Jumping June bugs! It's even
bigger than I remembered.

I guess we haven't
been invited over

since I broke your
parents' fancy toilet.

Speaking of which, where is
the bathroom again, sweetie?

Right this way, Grandpa!

Thanks again for letting
us crash, big bro.

Yes, Drew. Thank you.

Are you sure Charlotte's okay

with us staying
an entire weekend?

♪ Absolutely ♪

Always happy to spend
my treasured alone time

with family.

[Spike panting] And their dog.

All dogs do that scooch thing.

Even the well-trained ones.

The artisans who
hand-knotted this carpet

in 19th century Persia would
be overjoyed to hear that.

Would anyone else like a tour?

Great idea, princess.

Why don't you show
Cousin Tommy your room,

so he can start to
get comfortable there?

I gots to share my room
with a drooling baby?

Darling, we talked about this.

Daddy and I share a room, and
you don't see me complaining.

While you get the
children settled,

I'll order in some refreshments.

What do you say? You, me.

My video game console.
Your 80-inch flatscreen?

- Classic Stu.
- Still playing video games.

Charlotte had me donate
all my games to charity.

Oh, well. You never could
beat me at "Doorstop."

Wait. "Doorstop"?

It's not fair, Cynthia.

My mommy and daddy are apposed
to love me and give me stuff.

And instead, they
ruin my whole life!

There we go!

All set for you two.

Me and Tommy are gonna have
the best time together,

Aunt Didi.

Oh, sweet!

Tommy, remember to
listen to Angelica.

You're roomies now.

[sighs]

- Hey, Angelica.
- Want to play spaceman?

No. This isn't playtime.

If we're sharing a room,
that means we're married.

Uh, gosh. Are you sure?

I forgot your squishy, little
brain doesn't know stuffs yet.

Yes! My mommy and
daddy told me already.

So things are gonna
be a little different.

Um, maybe they could
stay the same as always?

Face the facts, Pickles!

We're married now. And
you heard Aunt Didi.

You gotta listen to me.

And first thing
I'm gonna tell you

is donate all your
toys to charity.

Now, tuck in your shirt.
We're having a dinner party.

[laughs haughtily]
Oh, how lovely.

Oh, how fine.

[laughs]

Oh, Cynthia, I love it
when you tell that story.

Don't you love that story, dear?

I said, don't you just love it

when Cynthia tells
that story, dear?

Oh!

Um, sure... dear.

[plastic teacup clacks]

I'd like to impose a toast,

to my husband Thomas,

the okaying-est husband
a lady could ever

[panting] Hey!

Where do you think you're going?

Get back here.

Oh. Sorry, Angelica.

We've only been
married 10 minutes.

You can't go crawling off.

Now, as I was saying... hey!

Ugh! Oh, forget the
dumb dinner parties.

What we need is a vacation.

- [squealing]
- [whimpering]

- No! Come on.
- Hey!

You can't shut that door on me

when I've made it
to the mezzanine!

Well, I'm sorry.

I didn't realize we were
playing by whiners' rules.

[doorbell chimes]
Ding-dong, doorman. Open up!

- [toy car horn toots]
- Angelica, look out!

Why? I'm a great driver.

Oh, Thomas, I think we're lost.

Um, were we going somewheres?

Yes.

Now, you push the car buttons,

and ignore which way the
robot lady says to go.

And then, I smile and say,
"But she knows best, dear."

Okay!

She's fierce. She's fashion.

She's serving up some sassin'.

Jonathan, I have a
personal emergency,

so I need you to call me back

and tell me there's
a work emergency

so I don't have to deal with it.

And then, I need you
to... [bowls clattering]

Charlotte! Oh, good.

I'm going to whip up my
mom's famous meringues,

to thank you for
letting us stay.

- Where do you keep your whisk?
- Oh, you won't find one.

No one's ever used this
kitchen to actually cook.

Maybe in here?

Oh! [Spike growls]

Not that I don't relish all
of this quality family time,

but I need to be somewhere else.

Good luck with your baking
and finding that wusk!

"Wusk"?

Whoa! I forgot the adrenaline
rush you get from games.

Eat my dust, Stu!

That expression is all wrong
for "Doorstop," but whatever.

Hey, Chas and Chuckie's house
got infested with bugs too.

Okay if they come
stay over here?

- Yeah!
- [doorbell chimes]

Honey, would you mind
getting that? I'm on a roll.

Oh, hey, Charlotte.

You are not gonna believe this,

but our house has to
get fumigated for bugs.

No, I believe it.

And Stu said Drew
said you wouldn't mind

if Chuckie and I stayed here?

Of course he did!

[strained] Please come in.

And a delivery guy
just gave me this.

I smell barbecued
tofu. You go, girl!

I'll take that, Chas.

[babbles]

How many times do I
have to tell you, dear,

I can't understand you when
you're brushing your teeth.

- What teeths?
- [sighs]

Chuckie, what are
you doing here?

Hiya, Tommy.

Well, we're staying
here, I guess.

- Finster! You're a lifesaver.
- I am?

Saving a life sounds like
a lot of 'sponsability,

so if it's all the same
to you, Angelica...

Too late. Me and
Tommy are married now,

and we need a baby, so
you're gonna be our baby.

But I don't know if I want
to be your baby, Angelica.

If you're living in our house,

you're gonna be our new baby.

Hmm. What should I name you?

- But I already have a name.
- Chuckie.

Blaine!

Blaine?

Blaine.

Angelica, where are
we taking Chuckie?

We're taking our baby
Blaine to the toy store.

And he can have all
the toys he wants.

Really?

- Hold on, Chuckie...
- I mean, Blaine.

My mommy usually lets me get
just one toy at the store.

Well, I guess I'm a nicer
and betterer mommy then.

[groans]

[grunts]

Hasn't he watched
enough cartoons, dear?

Blaine can watch cartoons
all the time he wants, dear.

Can I play too?

No! My baby Blaine never
has to share anything.

You're perfect.
You're never wrong.

You're the best baby
in the whole world!

Daddy and I love you more
than we love our cars.

Jonathan, you'd better
call me back immediately.

But don't call for
the next 20 minutes.

I'm going to take a
nice soak in my spa tub.

[sighs]

[water splashes]

Huh, this is some fancy
bubble bath you got.

French?

Open wide, Blaine.

Here comes the 'sghetti.

No! I don't wanna!

But you love 'sghetti.

- I don't want 'sghetti.
- I want cookies.

But I made 'sghetti!

I said I don't want
it, you dumb baby!

[gasps]

- You've spoiled him.
- Me?

- It just flew out of my mouth.
- Forgive me, Papa.

Maybe I'm not cut out
to be anyone's baby boy.

- Yes, you are, Chuckie.
- Your real daddy's.

Um, Angelica, I tried to
listen and be a good roomie,

like my mommy said, but I don't
want to be married anymore.

[gasps]

Oh, this is it.

I'm gonna finally
beat my baby brother.

[smoke alarm blaring]

Is that the smoke alarm?

Aha! Still undefeated!

[yelps]

Everyone, stay calm.

I am very handy with
a fire extinguisher.

Stand back and...

[screams shrilly]

So... this is goodbye.

Yeah. We tried our bestest.

- We sure did.
- Well, see you, Angelica.

Who's ready for a
sleepover at Aunt Betty's?

Mommy, Daddy, can you promise

we'll never do that again?

- Well...
- Oh, yes.

We promise.

Well, if that's what
your mother wants, yeah.

It's probably what's best.

♪ Once upon a time, there
was a turnip named Doug ♪

♪ Whose little brother,
Abraham, just wanted a hug ♪

[screams]

That was a close
one, eh, Chuckie?

Barry, did you clean
up those walnuts?

- [sarcastically]
- Yeah. Totally, Eve.

Wait... no.

All right, Chuckie.

Can you hand the turnip
to the nice lady?

Oh, well, aren't
you a good helper?

I've been looking for a good
helper to take care of this.

It's the very last balloon,

which makes it extra special!

- Just like you.
- Oh! Thank you so much.

Wow, Chuckie. The
very last balloon.

♪ Once upon a time, there
was a turnip named Stan ♪

♪ Who had a little dream
he'd drive a grocery van ♪

Jack Rocket, this
is Jill Target.

Are you aimed and ready? Over.

All systems go,
Jill Target. Over.

You are a rare breed, Deed.

Not a lot of wives out there

helping test drive their
husband's homemade catapults.

So much better than
store-bought catapults.

[both laugh]

Tommy, what's Teddy doing

next to that thing
your daddy made?

- I don't know, Lil.
- I think it's a 'speriment.

Prepare for launch, Jill Target.

Activating the launch
pedal in three, two...

One. And go!

[grunting] [car alarms wailing]

Did I miss the bear?

That is a negatory
on Ursa Flyboy.

- I don't get it.
- I stepped on the launch pedal.

It should have shot Tommy's
teddy bear over the roof.

Yeah, well, it looks like
you got a serious problem

with your gizmo.

Over and out.

Stu, I don't say this lightly.

These turnips are fire.

- [screams]
- Got it!

Relax, Chas. You were
never in any real danger,

thanks to my awesome
dad reflexes.

Dad reflexes?

You know, the primal
lightning reflexes

that enable all dads
to save our kids

from flying off a swing,
or stop a runaway scooter,

or catch a teddy bear midair.

- Think fast!
- [screams]

It looks like we need to
work on your dad reflexes.

Which is a great
reason for my catapult.

The difference between a
contraption and an invention

is purpose.

Come on, Chas. To the work shop.

- Don't want to go.
- Hurry.

We've gotta fine-tune

my Dad-o-matic
Rapid Reflex tester.

And yes, I just
made that name up.

Anything for science.

Hi, Chuckie.

Why are you holding
your balloon like that?

I'm keeping it nice and safe,

'cause that's my job now.

The grocery store lady told me

it's the last
balloon in the world.

Ooh, let me see
how bouncy it is.

No, Phil. You can't bounce it.

This balloon is
the real last one,

and I gotta take care of it,

or else nobody'll get to play
with a balloon, ever again.

Don't worry, Chuckie.

We'll teach you how to
take care of a balloon.

I guess that's not a bad idea.

As long as it's not like
that time you taught me

how to fit both my
feet in my mouth.

I'm still getting out
the taste of toenails.

Okay. What's the firstest
rule about balloon-having?

Oh, I know!

Don't hide it in the potty

right a'fore your
mommy goes potty.

That's the second rule, Phillip.

The first rule is
never let it fly away.

It just gots to hold
on to something heavy.

See?

Okay. I could do that.

But how do I keep
it from popping?

Easy. Just don't let your
balloon touch sharp stuff,

like pricker bushes,
or pointy pencils,

or old people whiskers.

And don't ever, never let it go

near the balloon popper machine.

That's what that's for?

Why do houses even have
a balloon popper machine?

Why do growed-ups
like long pants?

There's some stuffs
we'll never know.

I guess taking
care of a balloon's

not as hard as I thought.

Hey, maybe now we can
even play with it.

- Easy.
- Yay!

No pushing. One at a time.

[laughter]

And done.

All right, Chas. I'll
launch. You catch.

Okay, okay... wait.

Will the bear be flying on a
vertical axis or more of a...

- Follow your dad reflex!
- [screams]

[grunts]

Hey, at least the pedal's fixed.

Jack Rocket, you're
opening car trunks again.

Sorry, Mr. Windham!

And I'm a little worried about
Mr. Windham's pacemaker. Over.

Don't worry, Chaz.

Randy's on his way over,

and that dude's dad
reflexes are on point.

[laughter]

We all gots to go
through the tunnel

to turn into butterflies.

Hey, what if I come out
a peanut-butter fly?

Come on, balloon!

[balloon squeaking] [gasps]

What's going on
back there, Chuckie?

I'm stuck.

The balloon won't fit.

You made it let go
of its heavy thingy!

The balloon-popper
machine's gonna get it.

No! 'Cause of me,
Chuckie Finster,

there'll be no more
balloons forever.

Chuckie's balloon!

- Dad reflexes, go!
- [grunts]

[groans] His nose hit my tooth.

Gotcha!

This is why we're
doing the work, Chas.

I won't always be
here as backup.

You're a good friend, Stu.

Here, pal. Let's take care of
that balloon, once and for all.

Hey. We practicing
our dad reflexes?

- There's Randy!
- Up high!

[whimpers]

You'll get him next time.

Quick stop in my
workshop for a few tools,

and then we're back at it.

Well, let's do it!

I don't want to go
back to the workshop.

Tommy, please say

my daddy took the
balloon some place safe,

like the closet that just
gots papie towels in it.

- Nope. He tied it to you.
- [grunts]

It's gonna go everywhere you go

and do everything you do.

How will I ever play
hide-and-seek and hide

in my favoritest hiding
place underneath the table?

Is it even allowed
in the bathtub?

What if the bubbles get jealous?

What about when I
gots to go potty?

Oh, how did giving
that lady turnips

turn into the worst
day of my life?

A lot of stuffs happened
a'fore you got here.

It's all too much.

I'm just gonna take a nap now,

since it's the only safe thing
I can do with my balloon.

Here, Chuckie.

We'll go outside
for a little while.

No, no, no, balloon.

[eerie music]

[yawns]

When did it get so dark?

Tommy? Susie?

Hey, I don't gots
balloon anymore.

Phil! Lil!

Guess what!

Where did everybody go?

Well, twist me into
an animal shape!

Would ya look?

It's the last baby in the world!

- Wicked cool.
- Holy guacamole!

Hey, I'm not the last baby.

All my friends are babies.

I just don't know where
they are right now.

Poor, sweet thing.

Must be lonely living in a world

where all your friends are gone.

You must feel so deflated.

Hey, we better float out of
here, before a cloud shows up.

Wait! I don't want to be
the last baby in the world.

Being alone's scary.
I want my friends.

Tommy! Susie!

Phil! Lil!

Chuckie? What's the matter?

I had a bad dream, and now I
know being the last balloon

is one of the
scariest things ever.

I gots to help balloon
find his friends,

so he isn't scared
and alone anymore.

I know where you can
find more balloons.

Up there!

Susie, it's been
a real hard day,

and this is no time
for false hope.

No, no. It's true.

When my balloon flied
away, I was sad.

But my daddy said
balloons that fly away

go to a great, big
party in the sky.

So alls we have to do is
send Chuckie's balloon

to the sky party.

But how?

Chuckie's balloon
won't let go of him.

Who says I can't fly?

I can't believe
I'm gonna do this.

Do what? Take off your shoes?

No, Susie. Lil once said

that if a balloon holds
on to something heavy,

it won't fly away.

So if I make me not so heavy,

then maybe my balloon can
fly me up to the sky party,

to the other balloons.

Wow, Chuckie!

Um, but aren't you
a'scared to fly?

Of course, I'm scared to fly!

But if I gots to be scared
for just a little bit,

to help my balloon not be
lonely the rest of his life,

then that's what I'm gonna do.

Ooh, I'm still not
light enough to fly.

Pick your nose! Both holes!

Ew, Phil. No.

[chuckles] Hey!

Looks like Chuckie's getting
in touch with his wild side.

Chuckie?

Hey, buddy.

- [screaming]
- [screams]

Chuckie! Chuckie!

[whimpers]

- Kid tied to a balloon!
- This is not a drill!

[car alarms wailing]

We're almost... whoa.

Whoa!

Other balloons, if
you can hear me,

come back to your friend.

No! Both: I got him!

- I got him!
- I got him!

[grunts, wheezes]]

I got him.

You're okay, Chuckie.

You are the true
dad reflex master.

- Thanks to my catapult.
- Up high!

Oh, yeah!

But, okay, that hurt, so
reel it in, just a little.

Chuckie, you flied!

But I didn't get to the
party or find any balloons.

I'm sorry, balloon.

Maybe I can pretend to be a
balloon, like your friends.

[gasps] Chuckie, you
made 'em all come back!

- Look, balloon!
- Your friends are here!

Wait, wait.

Why are they floating away?

- Purple!
- [overlapping chatter]

Rogue balloons! 12:00!

[grunting]

All: Dang.

What? Haven't you ever
heard of mom reflexes?

How about we take all
these balloons inside?

Don't want anyone
flying away with them.

Oh, Deed, that
stuff only happens

in those epic
parent fail videos.

Hey, Barry,

did you weigh down
those balloons?

Yeah, totally, Eve.

Wait. No.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

Klasky Csupo.

[vocalizes]

[upbeat music]