RuPaul's Drag Race (2009–…): Season 6, Episode 2 - RuPaul's Big Opening: Part 2 - full transcript

- PREVIOUSLY
ON "RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE."

- WE'RE NOT HAVING
JUST ONE PREMIERE,

WE'RE HAVING TWO.

NEXT WEEK,
7 NEW QUEENS ARRIVE.

- [SCREAMS]

- USING THESE TRUNKS, CREATE
YOUR BEST HIGH-FASHION LOOK.

- OH!

- FUCK!

- BENDELACREME,
CONDRAGULATIONS,

YOU'RE THE WINNER
OF THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE.

[APPLAUSE]



- ADORE DELANO,

YOUR COUTURE
WAS A HONEY OF A BOO-BOO.

YOU'RE SAFE.

VIVACIOUS,
SHANTE, YOU STAY.

KELLY MANTLE,
SASHAY AWAY.

- WE MADE IT BACK!
- OH, MY GOD!

- WE'RE BACK IN THE WORKROOM.

IT'S REALLY EXCITING

TO HAVE FINISHED
OUR FIRST CHALLENGE.

- [SCREAMING]

- WE'RE JUST ALL EXCITED

TO MOVE FORWARD
TO THE NEXT STEP.

- OH, IT'S KELLY'S MESSAGE.

- EAT MY--



- BACON.
- WORK, MAMA.

- HOW LUCKY WERE WE
TO GET TO SHARE

THE FIRST EPISODE
WITH OUR SISTER KELLY, Y'ALL?

- BUT HOW MUCH MORE LUCKY ARE WE
THAT WE DIDN'T GET ELIMINATED?

- YEAH!
- WORD UP.

- I WAS ABOUT
TO HAVE AN EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN

ONSTAGE TODAY.

THIS IS SO SERIOUS FOR ME.

I'M HERE TO FUCKING PLAY
THE HARD GAME.

- I WONDER WHAT THE NEXT
TROGLODYTES ARE LIKE.

- WE'RE GOING TO EAT THEM ALIVE.

- IT'S GOING BE US AGAINST THEM,
AND IT'S GOING TO BE LIKE THIS.

BITCHES, LEAVE THEM
A FUCKING MESSAGE

ON THE DAMN MIRROR.

- I KNOW, RIGHT?
- OKAY.

- OKAY.
- OH!

- YEAH!
- THIS IS THE BEGINNING.

- HEY, LADIES.

I HATE TO BREAK UP A GOOD TIME,

BUT I'VE GOT COMPANY COMING
IN THE MORNING, DARLINGS.

SO, SHUT YOUR STINKING
PIEHOLES AND GO TO BED!

- ♪ RUPAUL DRAG RACE ♪

- THE WINNER
OF "RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE"

RECEIVES A SICKENING SUPPLY
OF COLOREVOLUTION COSMETICS,

AND A CASH PRIZE OF $100,000.

WITH EXTRA-SPECIAL GUEST JUDGE
KHLOE KARDASHIAN.

- ♪ RUPAUL DRAG RACE ♪

♪ MAY THE BEST WOMAN
BEST WOMAN WIN ♪

- WELL, WELL, WELL.
I HOPE YOU BITCHES ARE READY.

MY NAME IS BIANCA DEL RIO.

I'M 37 YEARS OLD.

AM I THE FIRST ONE?
GREAT.

DRAG QUEEN WHO'S EARLY--
THAT NEVER FUCKING HAPPENS.

I AM AN INSULT COMIC,
JUST LIKE DON RICKLES.

LOOKS LIKE A PARTY.

BUT IN A DRESS,
AND PRETTIER, AND NOT AS OLD.

PERHAPS THEY ALL WENT HOME

AFTER THEY HEARD
THAT I WAS HERE.

I FEEL IT'S MY DUTY
TO SHOW AMERICA

THAT SOME QUEENS
HAVE GOOD TEETH AND GOOD HAIR.

- I AM TRINITY K. BONET,
I AM 22 YEARS OF AGE.

- HI.
- HI.

TRINITY IS VIDEO FISH.

I'M ABOUT AS CLOSE
AS YOU'RE GOING TO GET

TO BEYONCE.

OH, LOOK, A PARTY.

- IT LOOKS LIKE A PARTY
JUST HAPPENED.

- THERE WAS CUPCAKES
THAT HAD ALREADY BEEN EATEN

AND STREAMERS
ALL OVER THE PLACE.

IT'S A MYSTERY.

WHEW, WOW.

IT'S REALLY COOL.

THIS IS KIND OF AWKWARD.

COOL.

- TRINITY REMINDS ME
OF A DEAR FRIEND OF MINE

FROM NEW ORLEANS.

SHE'S DEAD.

- I'M JOSLYN FOX,
I'M 26 YEARS OLD.

[GIGGLES]

JOSLYN FOX IS ALL ABOUT
THE LOOK AND SHOWING BODY.

JOSLYN FOX IS ONE FOXY LADY.

WAH, WAH.

[LAUGHS]

- HI, JOSLYN, I'M BIANCA.

- NICE TO MEET YOU, BIANCA.
- NICE TO MEET YOU.

APPARENTLY, JOSLYN WORE

EVERY FUCKING PIECE
OF JEWELRY SHE OWNED.

IT LOOKED LIKE
SHE WENT TO CLAIRE'S BOUTIQUE,

FELL ON A SALE RACK,
AND SAID, "I'LL TAKE IT."

- [GIGGLING]

- THOSE ARE NICE LEGS.
- THANK YOU.

- SHE'S A PIRATE.
ONE OF THOSE LEGS ARE WOODEN.

- I DO LIKE TO EAT AT IHOP.

- [GIGGLING]

- MILK, SHE DOES
A BODY GOOD, GIRL.

I'M MILK.
I'M 25 YEARS OLD.

MILK IS A CLUB KID,

A VERY CONCEPTUAL PERFORMER.

SHE IS NOT ONE NOTE,
SHE IS AN ENTIRE SYMPHONY.

HI, LADIES.

- MILK WALK IN THE ROOM,

YOU WOULD THINK
SHE WAS IN THE CIRCUS.

- NEW YORK QUEEN.

- I AM, I AM.

- WITH THOSE LASHES.

- WELL, YOU KNOW,
I GO FOR THE SUBTLE LOOK.

- WE'RE ALL JUST
A BUNCH OF CLOWNS, AREN'T WE?

- NO.

- OH, WOW.

MY NAME IS MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD,

I'M 28 YEARS OLD,

AND I AM SEATTLE'S
SEXIEST DRAG QUEEN,

SEATTLE'S FUNNIEST DRAG QUEEN.

UM--

[LAUGHS]

I VIEW MYSELF AS THE WORLD'S
MOST GLAMOROUS TRASH QUEEN.

- LOOK AT THAT NOSE.

HER CONTOURED NOSE TO DEATH.

OH, WHO ARE YOU POINTING AT?

- NICE TO MEET YOU, BIANCA.

- I THOUGHT SHE WAS
A FUCKING SWORDFISH.

SHE COULD FLIP PAGES
IN A BOOK.

- WHAT INSPIRED YOUR LOOK TODAY?

- WELL I WAS FEELING
KIND OF ANIMAL.

I'VE GOT THE LIONS.

- OH, I THOUGHT YOU WERE
GOING FOR PEG BUNDY.

- IS THIS
"AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL"?

OH, SORRY.

- [LAUGHS]

- JUST KIDDING!

MY NAME IS COURTNEY ACT.
I'M 31 YEARS OLD.

I'M ORIGINALLY FROM
SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA,

BUT NOW, I LIVE
IN WEST HOLLYWOOD.

HI, EVERYONE.

- HI.
- HI, COURTNEY.

I WAS STARSTRUCK.

NICE TO MEET YOU, COURTNEY,
I'M A BIG FAN OF YOURS.

MY NAME'S JOSLYN FOX.

THIS IS LIKE MEETING
A CELEBRITY.

I LOVE COURTNEY.

- I GUESS MY REPUTATION COULD
INTIMIDATE THE OTHER QUEENS.

I'M MOST FAMOUS
FOR BEING A FINALIST

ON THE FIRST SEASON
OF "AUSTRALIAN IDOL."

- SO, WHAT TYPE
OF ENTERTAINER ARE YOU?

- I'M A SINGER.
- OH.

- YEAH.
- LIVE?

- YEAH.
- OH, FUCK YOU.

COURTNEY LOOKS LIKE A GIRL,
VERY PRETTY.

BUT THAT DOESN'T IMPRESS ME.

IT'S NOT DRAG.

[HEELS CLICKING]

- I HEAR A CLYDESDALE.

- THEY BETTER WIDEN
THE DOORWAYS

AND REINFORCE
THE RUNWAY, HONEY,

BECAUSE A BIG GIRL'S
IN THE HOUSE.

I'M DARIENNE LAKE,
I'M 24 YEARS OLD,

AND I'M A COMPULSIVE LIAR.

I WAS PICKED FAN FAVORITE
ON THE ONLINE FACEBOOK CONTEST.

HI, I'M DARIENNE.

- I'M MILK.

- MILK, I'M HEAVY CREAM.

[LAUGHTER]

- SOME OF THE QUEENS ARE PRETTY,
I'M PRETTIER.

SOME OF THEM ARE FUNNY,
I'M FUNNIER.

AND SOME OF THEM ARE BIG,
BUT I'M BIGGER.

- HI, I'M MAGNOLIA.

- MAGNOLIA,
JUST A SPRINGTIME FLOWER.

I'M JUST BEGGING
TO BE POLLINATED, MYSELF.

- OH.

- WHAT HAS BEEN GOING ON HERE?

- I HAVE NO IDEA.

- SOMEBODY'S BEEN HERE.

- DID YOU SEE THAT?

- OH. I DON'T GET IT.

[SIREN WAILS]

- OH.

- OOH, GIRL!
YOU'VE GOT SHE-MAIL.

- WHAT?

SHOULDN'T THERE BE MORE CHICKS?

- WELCOME, MY QUEENS.

YOU MIGHT THINK
YOU WERE TARDY FOR THE PARTY,

BUT IT'S NOT
ABOUT WHO COMES FIRST,

IT'S ABOUT
WHO CAN LAST THE LONGEST.

- OH.

- [SQUEAKY VOICE]
NOW, YOU GOT TO FIGHT

FOR YOUR RIGHT TO PARTY!

- [LAUGHTER]

- MY VOICE
IS SO FISHY, RIGHT NOW.

- [LAUGHTER]
- YEAH!

- HMM.
- HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.

[APPLAUSE]

- WELCOME
TO "RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE."

NOW, YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED

THAT YOU'RE NOT
THE FIRST QUEENS TO ARRIVE.

IN FACT, LAST WEEK,
7 QUEENS CAME, COMPETED,

AND ONE HAS ALREADY
SASHAYED AWAY.

- OH.

- NOW, ON THE BRIGHT SIDE,

BY SPLITTING YOU
INTO TWO GROUPS,

YOUR CHANCE TO SNATCH
MY ATTENTION

IS BETTER THAN EVER.

BUT ON THE SHADY SIDE,
THERE'S A ONE IN 7 CHANCE

THAT YOU'LL BE ELIMINATED

BEFORE YOU EVEN MEET
THE OTHER QUEENS.

THE PRESSURE IS ON, LADIES.

ARE YOU READY
FOR YOUR BIG CLOSE-UP?

- CLASSIC RU,
FULL OF A LOT OF SURPRISES.

- LET'S GO.

- BITCHES ARE SWEATING.

- COMING UP--
WHAT'S THE "K" STAND FOR?

- KARDASHIAN.

- HONEY, YOU'RE GIVING ME
SOME KARDASHIAN ASS

IN THAT DRESS.

- [LAUGHS]

- [LAUGHS]

BIANCA DEL RIO.

I USUALLY DON'T LIKE
GOING FIRST,

UNLESS IT'S A BATH HOUSE,
SO THIS SHOULD BE FUN.

- [LAUGHS]

SAY "HELLO"
TO THE DREAMY MIKE RUIZ.

MIKE IS HERE TO SHOOT
YOUR SLUMBER PARTY PHOTO SHOOT.

YOU'LL BE POSING IN BED
WITH ALL 4 MEMBERS

OF THE SCRUFF PIT CREW,
SUPERSIZED FOR YOUR PLEASURE.

NOW, YOU NEED TO GIVE US FACE,

AND DELIVER
A SUPER SENSUOUS POSE,

NO MATTER
WHAT POPS UP OR POPS IN.

- [LAUGHTER]

- WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR
IS FOR THE GIRLS

TO REALLY STAND OUT
IN THE PHOTO.

- I'M FROM THE SOUTH,

SO IT FEELS LIKE
I'M WITH MY COUSINS.

- [LAUGHTER]

- OKAY, HERE WE GO.

MAKE DIRTY,
FILTHY LOVE TO THE CAMERA.

- IT'S HARD TO STAY UP.

- I THINK WE MIGHT NEED
TO TAKE IT UP A NOTCH.

DON'T YOU?

- AMP IT UP A LITTLE BIT.

- YEAH.
- OH GOD.

- I HAVE AN IDEA--
PILLOW FIGHT!

- OH, SHIT.

- OH, YEAH, OOH.
SEXIER!

- IT'S DIFFICULT
FOR SOMEONE LIKE ME TO BE SEXY.

HAVE YOU SEEN ME?
I'M CLOWN REALNESS.

- GET THAT FEATHER
OUT OF YOUR MOUTH THERE, YEAH.

HOPE YOU HAD
YOUR BIRD FLU SHOTS.

TRINITY K. BONET.

- WORK IT,
FEEL HER UP.

- OH.

- RU, I THINK WE NEED
TO TAKE IT UP A FEW NOTCHES.

- ARE YOU TALKING DUTCH OVEN?

- YES.

- PILLOW FIGHT!

- OH, OKAY.

NOW, PLAY TO THE CAMERA,
TRINITY.

YEAH, WORK IT.

- I LOVE DOING PHOTO SHOOTS
IN DRAG.

- THAT'S GORGEOUS.

- I'M A SUPERMODEL.

- BEYONCE, PUSH MICHELLE
OUT OF THE WAY.

- YES.

- IT'S A SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE.

JOSLYN FOX--
THERE'S A FOX IN THE HENHOUSE.

- OH, YOU'RE GIVING ME
A LITTLE RAQUEL WELCH THERE.

FEATHERS ARE FLYING
EVERYWHERE,

PILLOWS ARE COMING IN MY FACE.

THIS IS PURE CHAOS.

- OH, DEAR.
[GIGGLES]

- JOSLYN.

- GIRLS.
- HOW WAS IT?

- THAT WAS A MEAN TRICK.

- I'M NOTICING
THAT JOSLYN'S SKIRT

CONTINUED TO RISE ALL DAY.

I'M GOING TO NEED HER
TO PUT SOME PANTIES ON,

OR SOME BOY SHORTS,
OR SOMETHING.

IS THERE A BOTTOM HALF
TO THAT DRESS, GIRL?

- HELLO. I COULDN'T FIT IT
IN MY SUITCASE.

[LAUGHS]

- THAT'S GORGEOUS.
BEAUTIFUL.

- OH, YEAH.

COURTNEY ACT
IS CAUGHT IN THE ACT.

- COURTNEY KNOWS
HOW TO DO SEXY,

SHE'S A NATURAL.

- YES, EAT YOUR HEART OUT,
KYLIE MINOGUE.

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, RU?

I THINK WE NEED
A LITTLE SOMETHING EXTRA.

- POPPERS?

- [LAUGHTER]

- PILLOW FIGHT!
- YEAH!

- BINGO.

[LAUGHS]

- YEAH!

- OH, WORK IT.
OH, YES, MAMA.

THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING.
OH, YEAH.

- [CLUCKS]
- [LAUGHTER]

- COURTNEY'S SO FUNNY AND SEXY,

AND REALLY NAILING
THIS CHALLENGE.

- MOTHER,
MAY I SLEEP WITH DANGER?

MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD.

- PLAY TO THE CAMERA.

YOU NEED TO SERVE
THAT FACE, GIRL.

WE'RE LOSING IT.

- ALL RIGHT.

- YOU'RE KILLING ME, MARY.

WHO'S THIRSTY FOR MILK?
LOWER, MILK.

OH, OOH.

- STAY FOCUSED.

- HOT MILK.
- YES.

- FLASH THAT
LAUREN HUTTON SMILE.

- CAREFUL, THOSE FEATHERS
ARE COLLECTING--

- IN YOUR CLEAVAGE.
- YES.

OOH, THERE'S THAT COOKIE
I HAD EARLIER.

- OH, WOW.

- [BLUBBERS]

- [GIGGLES]

MOTORBOATING
ON DARIENNE LAKE.

- WHEW!

- GOOD MORNING.
- HOW DID IT GO?

- OH, MY GOD.

- DID YOU ENJOY IT?
- THAT WAS FUN.

- OH, MY GOD.

- HEY, JOSLYN.

- [GROANS]

- I'M TRYING TO RECOGNIZE
EVERYBODY OUT OF DRAG.

- EVERYBODY'S DE-DRAGGING,

AND IT'S KIND OF FUN TO SEE
THE MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN.

- OOH, THAT FELT GOOD.

- [LAUGHS]

- I'M JUST SO SURPRISED
TO SEE THAT BIANCA DEL RIO

IS A REAL HUMAN BEING

UNDERNEATH
ALL OF THAT CLOWN MAKEUP.

- OH, BOY BODIES.

AS A BOY, COURTNEY ACT
IS THE CUTEST.

SHE'S TAN
WITH THAT BEACH BLOND HAIR.

I NORMALLY DON'T DO DAIRY,

BUT FOR MILK,
I'LL MAKE AN EXCEPTION.

- HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.

- HI, RU.

- AND WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

- [LAUGHTER]

- LADIES, I'VE PULLED
AN ALL-NIGHTER

REVIEWING
YOUR SLUMBER PARTY PHOTOS.

SOME OF YOU
WERE A WET DREAM COME TRUE,

AND OTHERS WERE A REAL--
[SNORES]

SNOOZE.

BUT THE WINNER OF YOUR FIRST
MINI-CHALLENGE IS--

[COUGHS]

- [LAUGHTER]

- WHOA, WHERE'D THAT COME FROM?

TRINITY K. BONET.

- WHOO!

- I WON MY FIRST
PHOTO SHOOT CHALLENGE!

- CONDRAGULATIONS.

I'M POSTING YOUR PHOTO

ON THE "RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE"
INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT

SO EVERYONE CAN LIKE IT.

- THAT'S GOOD.

- NOW, AS A LITTLE SURPRISE,

I HAVE A PARTY FAVOR
FOR EACH OF YOU.

OH, SCRUFF PIT CREW!

OH, MY.
LOOK AT THOSE PACKAGES.

FOR THIS WEEK'S MAIN CHALLENGE,
YOU NEED TO CREATE

YOUR BEST LIFE-OF-THE-PARTY,
HIGH-FASHION COUTURE,

HASHTAG "PARTYLIKEADRAGQUEEN,"

USING ONLY THE LEFTOVERS
FROM ONE OF THESE PARTY PACKS.

THERE'S TOGA PARTY,
LUAU PARTY, PRINCESS PARTY,

QUINCEANERA,
ST. PATRICK'S DAY PARTY,

REPUBLICAN PARTY,
AND MY FAVORITE, HOEDOWN.

- [CHUCKLING]

- TRINITY,
YOU WON THE MINI-CHALLENGE,

SO, YOU GET TO PICK YOURS FIRST,

AND THEN RE-GIFT THE OTHERS.

- I WANT THE PRINCESS PARTY.

- NOW, WHICH BOX HAVE YOU CHOSEN
FOR DARIENNE LAKE?

- ST. PATRICK'S.

- ST. PATRICK'S DAY PARTY.
WHAT ABOUT JOSLYN FOX?

- QUINCE-A-YETTA.

- QUINCEANERA FOR JOSLYN FOX.

- YAY.

- MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD.

- HOEDOWN.

- ALL RIGHT.
WHAT ABOUT COURTNEY ACT?

- REPUBLICAN.

- THAT SEEMS FAIR AND BALANCED.
FOR BIANCA DEL RIO?

- LUAU.

HOPE I GET LAID.
[CHUCKLING]

- SO, THAT MEANS THAT MILK
GETS THE TOGA PARTY.

GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES,

AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN.

- THIS IS THE FIRST CHALLENGE,
AND I WANT TO FUCKING WIN.

I GOT BILLS TO PAY.

I GOT DOGS
TO PUT THROUGH COLLEGE.

- COMING UP--

WHAT KIND OF SILHOUETTE
ARE YOU PLANNING?

- I'M THINKING
VERY, KIND OF...

LIKE, SORT OF...

MAYBE NOT QUITE.
MORE...

OH GOD,
I DON'T KNOW.

- [LAUGHS]

- [LAUGHS]

- OH, LOOK, COURTNEY.

- WHAT?
- MY HAIRY NUTS.

HA HA HA!
- OH.

- THOSE AREN'T CHA-CHA HEELS.

TODAY'S CHALLENGE IS TO CREATE
A HIGH-FASHION OUTFIT

BASED ON WHAT WE HAVE
IN OUR PARTY BOX.

HMM, OKAY.

- IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS.

[GIGGLES]

OOH!

THERE'S EVERY COLOR
YOU COULD EVER THINK OF.

I LOVE EVERYTHING IN MY BOX.
[GIGGLES]

I HAVE HOUSE NUMBERS.

- A HOUSE--IT'S YOUR AGE.

- 51.

- 15. STICK THEM ON YOUR HEAD.
SEE IF ANYBODY COMES TO VISIT.

- [GIGGLES]
KNOCK, KNOCK.

- OKAY. HAY.

THAT'S UGLY.

OH, MY GOD.
THIS IS...

AWFUL.

I GOT A BUNCH OF SHIT.

IT HAS NOTHING TO DO
WITH MY STYLE.

JESUS CHRIST.

- IT'S THE FIRST CHALLENGE.

GOOD GOD, GIRL, GET A GRIP.

- THAT'S UGLY.

- HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.

- HI.
- HI, RUPAUL.

- HOW ARE
MY PARTY MONSTERS DOING?

DARIENNE LAKE.

- HI.
- LUCK OF THE IRISH.

- OH.
[GIGGLES]

- [LAUGHS]
- OH.

- SO, NOW, OF COURSE, THE BOX
IS A ST. PADDY'S DAY PARTY BOX,

BUT THE CHALLENGE
ISN'T TO DO LEPRECHAUN.

- RIGHT.

- BUT IT'S TO INTERPRET THE BOX
TO DARIENNE LAKE'S STYLE.

- EXACTLY.

- AND WHAT KIND OF SILHOUETTE
ARE YOU PLANNING?

- I'M THINKING
VERY, KIND OF...

LIKE, GLAMOUR EXECUTIVE,
SORT OF.

MAYBE NOT QUITE.

MORE--

OH, GOD.
I DON'T KNOW.

YOU KNOW?

- SO, IT'S IN PROCESS.
IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING?

- MM-HMM.

DEAD.

- WELL, LUCK
OF THE IRISH TO YOU.

- TRINITY K. BONET.

- HEY, WHAT IT DO, MAMA RU?

- NOW, WHAT'S THE "K" STAND FOR?

- KARDASHIAN.
- KARDASHIAN, REALLY?

SO, NOW, YOU'VE GOT
THE PRINCESS PARTY BOX.

- YES.

- WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING FOR IT?

I WANTED TO PLAY
WITH TWO TYPES OF PRINCESSES,

FUTURISTIC PRINCESS LEIA
AND PRINCESS KATE.

- KATE MIDDLETON.

- EXACTLY.
- OKAY.

- YEAH.

- SO, YOU'RE SOMEWHERE
BETWEEN "STAR WARS"

AND BUCKINGHAM PALACE.

- MM-HMM.

- SO, UM, GREAT.

I'M GOING
TO BE LOOKING OUT FOR YOU.

COURTNEY ACT.

- HI, RUPAUL.
- I CAUGHT YOU IN THE ACT.

- YOU DID CATCH ME IN THE ACT.

THANK YOU FOR EXPLAINING
MY NAME TO AMERICA,

BECAUSE I KNOW
THAT IN AMERICAN ACCENTS,

IT DOESN'T ALWAYS WORK,
EXCEPT MAYBE IN BOSTON.

- RIGHT.
- CAHT-NEY ACT.

- YES.
IS THIS COURTNEY ACT'S STYLE?

BECAUSE YOU SHOW
A LOT OF BODY, DON'T YOU?

- YEAH. I'M SURE
THAT MICHELLE WILL SAY,

"COURTNEY,
STOP RELYING ON THAT BODY."

- [LAUGHS]

JUST MAKE SURE YOU DON'T
COME DOWN THE RUNWAY

LOOKING LIKE THE DOG'S DINNER.

SEE YOU LATER.
- THANK YOU, RU.

- BIANCA DEL RIO.

- YOU CAN CALL ME JIGGLY.

- [LAUGHS]

I'VE GOT TO ASK YOU--
THAT RAPID-FIRE, QUICK WIT,

DID YOU ALWAYS HAVE THAT?

- IT'S JUST INSTINCTIVE.

AND I CALL IT
MY LITTLE ROLODEX OF HATE.

SO, WHEN YOU'RE FACED
WITH A SITUATION,

YOU JUST ROLL THROUGH,

AND YOU GO, "WHAT DO I HAVE,
WHAT DO I HAVE?"

- NOW, YOU HAVE
A BACKGROUND IN FASHION.

- I WORK FOR A BROADWAY
COSTUME COMPANY

IN NEW YORK CITY.

WE BUILD COSTUMES,
SO IT COMES IN HANDY

WHEN YOU'RE A DRAG QUEEN.

- ABSOLUTELY.

SO, I'M ASSUMING YOU'RE GOING
TO KILL THIS CHALLENGE.

- I HOPE.

- I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT YOU
WALK DOWN THAT RUNWAY WITH.

- WELL, THANK YOU.
I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.

- ALL RIGHT.
- SEE YOU THEN.

- OKAY.
- THANKS.

- MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD.

- HI, RU.

- HOW YOU DOING?

- I'M FEELING REALLY--
REAL HONKY-TONKY,

READY FOR A HOEDOWN.

- THAT'S THE PARTY BOX
YOU GOT IS THE HOEDOWN.

- THAT'S THE BOX I GOT.

- WHAT WAS IN THERE?

- HIDEOUS FABRIC.
- REALLY?

- I GOT A BIG OLD SHEET
OF DENIM.

- OH, DENIM IS GOOD.
WE LIKE DENIM.

- YEAH, I DON'T THINK
IT SCREAMS HIGH FASHION.

THERE'S THIS BROWN,
WHICH LOOKS LIKE SHIT.

- WHAT IS
MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD'S STYLE?

- I THINK OF MYSELF
AS A GLAMOROUS TRASH QUEEN.

- UH-HUH.

- THINGS THAT ARE SO UGLY,
THEY'RE PRETTY.

- WELL, LISTEN, THIS CHALLENGE
COULD BE RIGHT UP YOUR ALLEY.

TURN IT OUT, MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD.

- THANK YOU.

- OKAY.

JOSLYN FOX.

- HEY, RUSIE Q.

- NOW, WHICH BOX DID YOU GET?

- QUINCEANERA.

- SO, WHAT DO YOU HAVE PLANNED?

- I'VE FINALLY SELECTED--
NARROWED DOWN MY FABRICS.

- YEAH. THAT'S A LOT OF FABRIC.

- WELL, I WANT TO AVOID IT
BEING TOO LOUD AND TOO BUSY.

- ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

- THANK YOU, RUSIE Q.

- WELL, HELLO THERE, MILK.

- HI.

- ARE YOU WEARING
ACID-WASHED HOT PANTS?

- I AM.
- [LAUGHS]

WHAT IS MILK ALL ABOUT?

- SHE IS BIG AND SCARY,

FREAKY AND CREEPY,
AND THAT'S WHAT I LOVE TO DO.

- SO, YOUR CAMP AESTHETIC,

HOW IS THAT GOING TO MEET
WITH HIGH FASHION?

- I'M GOING FOR SORT
OF "XANADU," LIKE, JUMPSUIT.

- OH, BOY, OKAY.

DO YOU THINK YOU CAN MAKE
A JUMPSUIT HIGH FASHION?

- I DO.

- YEAH?
- YEAH.

- WELL, LISTEN,
I JUST GOT TO TELL YOU,

YOU'RE UP AGAINST
A LOT OF COMPETITION,

AND YOU WILL BE
UNDER A LOT OF SCRUTINY.

- I REALLY WANT
MY FIRST IMPRESSION

TO BE UNIQUE,

SOMETHING VERY MILK.

I'M STILL DOING PANTS.

LADIES, GATHER ROUND.

NOW, TOMORROW, THE PARTY MOVES
TO THE MAIN STAGE,

WHERE WE'LL BE JOINED

BY OUR EXTRA-SPECIAL
GUEST JUDGE--

BIBLE--

[CHURCH CHOIR SINGING]

KHLOE KARDASHIAN.

- [GASPING]

- MY IDOL, KHLOE KARDASHIAN.

I'M IN HEAVEN.

- ARE YOU KEEPING UP?

- [LAUGHS]

- DON'T FUCK IT UP.

SEE YOU LATER.

COMING UP--

- I'M THINKING
ABOUT WEARING FACIAL HAIR.

- REALLY, QUEENIE?
HOPE YOU'RE PACKED.

- YOU THINK THIS REPRESENTS YOU?

- I CAN'T EVEN BEGIN.

- YOU'VE GOT
TO BRING IT EVERY TIME.

- OKAY.

- THIS IS THE MOTHERFUCKING
OLYMPICS, GIRL.

[LAUGHS]

- [LAUGHS]

- GOOD MORNING, WORKROOM.
- OOH.

- THIS MORNING,
WE'RE BACK IN THE WORKROOM,

FINISHING UP OUR LOOKS
FOR OUR VERY FIRST RUNWAY.

- STUFF TO DO, STUFF TO DO.

- ONE OF US IS GOING HOME,

AND WE DONE ALREADY UNPACKED
ALL OUR SHIT.

AIN'T NOBODY TRYING
TO PACK IT BACK UP.

- SOMETIMES,
WHEN DRAG QUEENS WEAR PANTS,

YOU GET THAT
LOVELY MOOSE KNUCKLE EFFECT.

- WELL--
- IT IS WHITE.

WHAT GOES ON THE MIDDLE?

- SHE'S JUST WEARING
HER TITS OUT.

- OH.

- YEAH. I'M THINKING
ABOUT WEARING FACIAL HAIR.

- OKAY.

A BEARD--
REALLY, QUEENIE?

- I MEAN, I'LL DO ANYTHING
TO MAKE MYSELF LOOK DIFFERENT.

- OKAY.
HOPE YOU'RE PACKED.

HA, HA, HA.
- HA, HA, HA.

- NICE KNOWING YOU.
- BITCH.

OF COURSE I'M GETTING
WEIRD LOOKS

FOR THROWING ON A BEARD.

I DON'T CARE
WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT MY LOOK.

SCREW THEM.

- THAT WILL GO UNDERNEATH,
AND THEN THIS WILL GO--

- OH, THERE'S MORE.

- UNDERNEATH AS WELL.

- WOW, IT'S A PRODUCTION.

JOSLYN'S OUTFIT
IS A LITTLE BUSY.

- I COULDN'T STOP MYSELF.

- ACTUALLY, IT'S REALLY BUSY.

- AND THESE ARE MY SHOES.

- NO ONE'S EVER SEEN
A QUINCEANERA QUITE LIKE THIS.

- IN THIS CHALLENGE,

I MAY BE UNDERESTIMATED
BY THE OTHER QUEENS,

BUT I PLAN ON BEING
THE BLACK HORSE

IN THIS COMPETITION.

- OH, IT IS DARK HORSE,
ISN'T IT?

I'VE ALWAYS SAID "BLACK HORSE."

[GIGGLES]

- I THINK I'M GOING
TO START PUTTING ON MY FACE.

- SO, LIKE, IN AUSTRALIA,
ARE YOU KIND OF, LIKE,

NATALIE IMBRUGLIA FAMOUS?

- I'M A HOUSEHOLD NAME.

IF YOU SAY "COURTNEY ACT,"

THEY'LL KNOW
WHO YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

I WAS A FINALIST
ON THE FIRST SEASON

OF "AUSTRALIAN IDOL."

I GOT SIGNED TO SONY BMG,
I TOURED AROUND THE COUNTRY,

AND I'VE GONE ON TO HAVE

A REALLY GREAT AND WONDERFUL
CAREER IN AUSTRALIA.

- YOU'RE A BIG DEAL.

I'M NOT NERVOUS AT ALL
ABOUT GOING UP

AGAINST COURTNEY ACT.

I DON'T SEE A LOT OF,
LIKE, DRAG THERE.

I WAS ON A STEREO SHOP
COMMERCIAL,

BUT IT WAS ONLY LOCAL.

- TELL ME ABOUT THAT.

- WE WERE IN DRAG.

THEY WANTED SOME LOCAL,
LIKE, CELEBRITY-TYPE PEOPLE.

- AND NONE OF THEM
WERE AVAILABLE,

WHICH IS WHY YOU TOOK THE JOB.

- OOH!
- I'M KIDDING.

- IT'S TRUE.

- MILK HAS PUT ON A BEARD.

- OOH, SHE'S BEARDSY, HUH?

- WHAT THE FUCK?

- REALLY, QUEEN?

I SPENT ALL FUCKING MORNING
SHAVING MINE OFF.

HELLO!

- [LAUGHS]

- ♪ COVER GIRL
PUT THE BASS IN YOUR WALK ♪

♪ HEAD TO TOE
LET YOUR WHOLE BODY TALK ♪

♪ AND WHAT ♪

[APPLAUSE]

- WELCOME TO THE MAIN STAGE
OF "RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE."

MICHELLE VISAGE.

- MY GORGEOUS STEEL MAGNOLIA.

- [LAUGHS]
SANTINO RICE.

ARE YOU READY TO PARTY
AND PLAY?

- [LAUGHS]

- AND DRAG RACE SUPERFAN,
KHLOE KARDASHIAN.

[APPLAUSE]

- NOW, HAVE YOU EVER PARTIED
LIKE A DRAG QUEEN?

- OH, HONEY, DO YOU NOT KNOW
MY FAMILY AND MY SISTERS?

WE'RE ALL QUEENS AT HEART.

- HALLELU.
- [LAUGHS]

- THIS WEEK,
FOR PART TWO OF MY BIG OPENING,

OUR QUEENS WERE CHALLENGED
TO TRANSFORM LEFTOVER SUPPLIES

INTO ONE-OF-A-KIND,
LIFE-OF-THE-PARTY COUTURE.

NOW, THEY ARE READY
TO GET THEIR SWERVE ON.

GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES,
AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN.

♪ NOW, SISSY THAT WALK ♪

- FIRST UP, TRINITY K. BONET.
HOLY TRINITY.

I THINK SHE'S INTERGALACTATING,
SERVING ANTHRAX.

- I'VE SNORTED WORSE IN MY LIFE.

- [LAUGHS]

- I AM GIVING YOU QUEEN AMIDALA
GOES TO THE MET GALA EVENT.

EVERYBODY'S CHECKING ME OUT.
I LOOK GOOD.

- SHE COMES IN PEACE...
OF ASS.

- [LAUGHS]

- BIANCA DEL RIO.

- DAUGHTER OF VANESSA DEL RIO?

- OOH.
- YES, CAN'T YOU TELL?

LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HER NUTS.

- I'M GIVING MISS HONOLULU
1968 HIGH FASHION.

I'M FEELING IT.

HAWAII 5--OH, NO,
SHE BETTER DON'T.

- UH-HUH.
- [LAUGHS]

- DIP INTO THE WATERS
OF DARIENNE LAKE.

- WELL, HELLO, MRS. LAKE.

TONIGHT I'M GIVING ON THE RUNWAY
SEVENTIES STUDIO 54 COUTURE.

- WOW.
LOOK AT THOSE LUCKY CHARMS.

- SHAKE OUR TITS.

- HELL, YEAH!

- NOW, WHERE IS SHE HIDING
THAT POT OF GOLD?

- AT THE END OF HER RAINBOW.

- HERE COMES
MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD,

FROM HOEDOWN TO COUTURE.

- HOLSTEIN COUTURE.

- WOULD YOU CALL THAT
A MOO-MOO?

- MILK IT.
[MOOS]

- I FEEL LIKE HOEDOWN
MEETS HIGH SCHOOL PROM IN 1993.

- SHE'S UDDER-LY FANTASTIC.

- WORK IT, HEIFER.

- JOSLYN FOX, QUINCEANERA.

15 GOING ON FABULOUS!

- WHERE THE PARTY AT?

- EVERYWHERE, APPARENTLY.

- [CHUCKLES]
- SANDBAGS.

- I AM SERVING UP FUN,
FLIRTY LIFE-OF-THE-PARTY,

BECAUSE THAT IS JOSLYN FOX.

- TIJUANA?
YES, I DO.

- HA!

- COURTNEY ACT.

- LOOK AT THAT BIG BOX.
[LAUGHS]

- OH, SAY CAN YOU SEE?

- SHE'S A MEMBER
OF THE TEA BAG PARTY.

- [LAUGHS]

- I'M FEELING LIKE A VIXEN.

I'M BARING FLESH, I'VE GOT LEGS,

I'VE GOT BODY-ODY-ODY.

- OH, YES. SHE'S WALKING
THE PARTY LINE, DARLING.

- WORK IT OUT.

- DON'T IT MAKE
YOUR RED STATE BLUE?

MILK!

- FROM TOGA PARTY TO COUTURE.

OH, DEAR.

NOW, I'VE HEARD
OF A MILK MOUSTACHE, BUT--

- HONEY.

- I AM SERVING
HERMAPHRODITE REALNESS.

I AM FEELING "XANADU,"
AND I AM WORKING IT OUT.

- VERY SISTER DIMENSION.

- OR FATHER TIME,
DEPENDING HOW YOU LOOK AT IT.

- ♪ NOW SISSY THAT WALK ♪

COMING UP--

- IT WAS JUST A DISASTER.

- I GET THIS ANGRY VIBE
FROM YOU.

- YOU HAVE
TO GET PEOPLE TO LIKE YOU.

[LAUGHS]

- [LAUGHS]

WELCOME, PARTY GIRLS.

IT'S TIME
FOR YOUR FIRST CRITIQUE

FROM THE JUDGES.

FIRST UP,
TRINITY KARDASHIAN BONET.

- HONEY, YOU'RE GIVING ME
SOME KARDASHIAN ASS

IN THAT DRESS.

- OH.
- [LAUGHS]

- I THINK THAT
WOULD'VE BEEN FIERCE

WITHOUT THE BULLETIN BOARD
BEHIND YOUR NECK.

CAN YOU TAKE THAT OFF?
SEE?

LOOK HOW MUCH MORE BEAUTIFUL
THAT LOOKS.

- GORGE.

- THANK YOU, TRINITY.
NEXT UP, BIANCA DEL RIO.

- THAT DRESS IS GORGEOUS.

- YOU DEFINITELY KNOW
HOW TO CONSTRUCT FOR THE BODY.

- NOW, DON'T STEAL THIS

AND TRY MARKETING THIS
AT SEARS, NOW, GIRL.

- OH, HONEY,
IT'S STOLEN, IT'S GONE.

I DO THINK THAT YOUR EYE MAKEUP
IS A LITTLE TOO HEAVY,

BECAUSE I DON'T FEEL LIKE
I COULD SEE YOUR EYES

AS MUCH AS I WOULD LIKE TO.

- IT'S JUST A SOFTENING
OF THE EDGES,

BUT THOSE DIMPLES
ARE EVERYTHING.

- I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU COULD SEE MY ASS.

- [LAUGHTER]

- ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU, BIANCA.
- THANK YOU.

- NEXT UP, DARIENNE LAKE.
- OH, HELLO, DEAR.

- YOUR FACE LOOKS BEAUTIFUL.

THAT'S HOW YOU SOFTEN
THE EDGES, RIGHT THERE.

- IT LOOKS GORGEOUS.

- BUT THAT SAID,
A LITTLE BORING HERE.

- I HAVE A VERY BIG CAMEL TOE.

MY PUSS IS VERY LARGE
AND IN CHARGE--

I'M A BIG GIRL.

I EMBRACE IT, THOUGH,
BUT I CANNOT HAVE RUCHING

IN FRONT OF MY BODY,

BECAUSE IT'S JUST GOING
TO ACCENTUATE MY PUSS.

I WISH YOUR OUTFIT WAS STRONGER.

- NEXT UP, MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD.

- MY EYES HONED RIGHT IN
ON THAT NOSE CONTOUR,

IT IS SO DARK, GIRL.

- AND THAT DRESS,
IT'S VERY BASIC.

IT'S, LIKE, SO--

- I DON'T THINK
THAT THIS PRINT IS BASIC.

- BUT YOU THINK
THIS REPRESENTS YOU?

- YES, BECAUSE I AM ATTRACTED
TO THINGS THAT ARE SO UGLY

THEY'RE FABULOUS.

- YOU'RE NOT GIVING ME THAT.

- I--
- THAT'S NOT UGLY.

- BUT I DIDN'T LIKE MY BOX.

THERE'S ONLY SO MUCH YOU CAN DO
WITH RED AND WHITE CHECK.

- THE THING IS,
YOU COULD'VE DONE MORE.

- I'VE GOT A GODDAMN BOW
ON MY ASS.

- I GET THIS ANGRY VIBE
FROM YOU.

- I--OKAY.

- THIS IS THE MOTHERFUCKING
OLYMPICS, GIRL.

YOU'VE GOT TO BRING IT
EVERY TIME.

AND IF YOU WANT TO BE
IN THIS BUSINESS,

YOU HAVE TO GET PEOPLE
TO LIKE YOU.

WE'RE GOING TO MOVE ON.

NEXT UP, JOSLYN FOX.

- HEY, JOSLYN.

- HELLO, YOU SEXY,
SEXY, BALD MAN.

- [LAUGHS]

THE WHOLE OUTFIT
IS JUST OVER THE TOP.

IT WAS LIKE A PARADE FLOAT.

- SHE DIDN'T WEAR ANYTHING
FROM HER BOX,

AND YOU WORE EVERY FRIGGIN'
THING IN YOUR BOX.

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.

YOU DON'T NEED ALL OF THAT.

CUT IT IN HALF.

- NEXT UP, COURTNEY ACT.

- G'DAY.

- YOU'RE GIVING ME
CHERYL TIEGS' "COSMO" COVER,

1976.

- I HONESTLY WANT
TO JUST SKIN YOU ALIVE

AND WEAR YOUR BODY.

YOUR BODY IS PHENOMENAL.

- I DID NOTICE
THAT YOU WERE TRIPPING UP

A LITTLE BIT ON YOUR SKIRT.

- IT'S JUST TOO LONG, I THINK.

- THANK YOU, COURTNEY.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST, MILK.

- SO, MILK,

DO YOU THINK THIS IS
REPRESENTATIVE OF WHO YOU ARE?

- YEAH. I HAVE A VERY QUIRKY
PERSONA AND STYLE.

I KNOW I'M NOT GOING
TO EVER FIT IN

WITH THOSE GLAMOROUS QUEENS,
AND SO, WHY NOT STAND OUT?

- YOU PROBABLY
COULD'VE LEFT OFF THE BEARD,

BECAUSE REALLY,
THE WHOLE ENSEMBLE

LOOKS LIKE A MILLION DOLLARS.

REALLY, IT'S LIKE
A FASHION ILLUSTRATION

JUST RIGHT OFF THE PAGE.

- YOU ARE OWNING EVERYTHING
OF WHO YOU ARE.

THAT'S WHAT I LOVE.

- ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.

THANK YOU, LADIES.

WHILE YOU UNTUCK
IN THE FORMDECOR LOUNGE,

THE JUDGES AND I
WILL DELIBERATE.

ALL RIGHT, JUST BETWEEN US
SQUIRREL FRIENDS,

LET'S START
WITH TRINITY KARDASHIAN BONET.

- I LOVE TRINITY'S CREATIVITY.

TRINITY BROUGHT
AN ENTIRE PERFORMANCE

TO THE RUNWAY.

- AFTER SHE TOOK THE PIZZA BOX
OFF FROM HER NECK,

I THOUGHT SHE WAS FIERCE.

- BIANCA DEL RIO.

LOVE THAT DRESS.
I WOULD WEAR THAT DRESS.

- I LOVED HER SENSE OF HUMOR.

SHE'S A QUEEN I'LL BE WATCHING.

- THE ONLY CRITIQUE
IS THE MAKEUP.

- YOU GOT TO BLEND.

- SISSY THAT FACE.

- YOU BETTER
SISSY THAT FACE, GIRL.

DARIENNE LAKE.

- SHE'S STUNNINGLY GORGEOUS.
- YEAH.

- BUT IT LOOKED LIKE
SHE WENT TO THE FANCY SECTION

AT DRESS BARN.

- UNFORGIVABLE IS THE RUCHING.

- THE COOCHIE RUCHING.
- OH, MY GOD.

THE PUFFY PUSS--
I CAN'T DEAL.

- MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD.

- GIRL, IF YOU'RE GOING
TO WEAR COW PRINT,

YOU BETTER CAMP THE HELL
OUT OF THAT DRESS.

- SURE, WEAR A BELL
AROUND YOUR NECK.

IT'S INTERESTING
WATCHING MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD

GET SO DEFENSIVE.

I TOTALLY RELATE TO IT,
I'VE BEEN THERE MYSELF.

- I GET IRRITATED

WHEN THEY TALK
ABOUT MY MARRIAGE OR MY SISTERS.

- SURE.

- BUT I WANT TO BE
A BETTER VERSION OF ME.

THAT TAKES CONSTANT WORK.

- AND IF YOU'RE GOING
TO BE DEFENSIVE,

THEN IT DEFEATS THE POINT.

ALL RIGHT,
LET'S MOVE ON TO JOSLYN FOX.

- I DON'T KNOW IF I COULD
FORGIVE THAT OUTFIT,

THE MIDSECTION HAD NO SHAPE.

- I DON'T MIND THAT OUTFIT.

IT'S NOT
LIKE SHE'S COMING OUT HERE

IN A CAREER WOMAN,
AND, YOU KNOW--

- NO, BUT THE CONSTRUCTION
WAS JUST A DISASTER.

- COURTNEY ACT.

- THERE WAS NOT MUCH GOING ON
TO THAT OUTFIT,

SO SHE DEFINITELY
WAS RELYING ON HER BODY,

WHICH, HEY,
IF YOU'VE GOT IT, RELY ON IT.

- YEAH.
- DO WHATEVER YOU CAN.

- BUT I JUST WOULD
EXPECT A LOT MORE FROM HER.

- ALL RIGHT, LET'S MOVE ON.
WHO WANTS MILK?

- HOPEFULLY,
MILK WILL BE ABLE

TO MAKE THE LOOK
MORE FEMININE WHEN WE ASK HER.

- WITH THAT SAID,

I THOUGHT IT WAS A BALLSY MOVE
TO COME OUT WITH A BEARD.

- I LIKE A BIG SET OF BALLS.

- YEAH, GIRL.
- YOU KNOW, HONEY, PLEASE.

- [LAUGHS]

- SILENCE.
I'VE MADE MY DECISION.

BRING BACK MY GIRLS.

[LAUGHS]

- [LAUGHS]

WELCOME BACK, LADIES.

I'VE MADE SOME DECISIONS.

TRINITY K. BONET,

YOU'RE SAFE.

BIANCA DEL RIO,

YOUR COUTURE
WAS A REAL MAUI WOWIE.

CONDRAGULATIONS,

YOU'RE THE WINNER
OF THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE.

[APPLAUSE]

YOU'VE WON A $2,500
SHOPPING SPREE

FROM FABRIC PLANET.

MILK, FOR NOT PLAYING IT SAFE,

YOU'RE SAFE.

COURTNEY ACT.

BODY, 10,

COUTURE, 6.

YOU'RE SAFE.

MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD,

YOUR BOVINE DESIGN
WAS NOT DIVINE.

WHERE'S THE BEEF?

I'M SORRY, MY DEAR,
BUT YOU ARE UP FOR ELIMINATION.

DARIENNE LAKE,

YOUR FACE IS PAINTED
FOR THE AGES,

BUT YOUR RUCHE LOOKED RUSHED.

JOSLYN FOX,

YOUR COUTURE REMINDS ME
OF A WEDDING--

SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW,
SOMETHING BORROWED,

SOMETHING BLUE, GREEN, YELLOW,

PINK, RED, CHARTREUSE.

- [LAUGHS]

- JOSLYN FOX, YOU'RE SAFE.

DARIENNE, MY DEAR,
I'M SORRY,

BUT YOU ARE UP FOR ELIMINATION.

- IT'S JUST ME AND MAGNOLIA.

- GIVE ME THE FIRING SQUAD,
I'M READY.

- TWO QUEENS STAND BEFORE ME.

LADIES, THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE
TO IMPRESS ME

AND SAVE YOURSELF
FROM ELIMINATION.

THE TIME HAS COME

FOR YOU TO LIP-SYNC

FOR YOUR LIFE.

GOOD LUCK,

AND DON'T FUCK IT UP.

- ♪ TURN THE BEAT AROUND ♪

♪ LOVE TO HEAR PERCUSSION ♪

♪ FLUTE PLAYER
PLAY YOUR FLUTE 'CAUSE ♪

♪ I KNOW THAT YOU WANT
TO GET YOUR THING OFF ♪

♪ BUT YOU SEE I'VE MADE UP
MY MIND ABOUT IT ♪

♪ GOT TO BE THE RHYTHM
NO DOUBT ABOUT IT ♪

♪ WHOA, WHOA ♪

♪ TURN THE BEAT AROUND ♪

♪ I'M GOING, I'M GOING
I'M GOING, GOING, GONE ♪

♪ LOVE TO HEAR PERCUSSION ♪

♪ MOVE YOUR FEET
WHEN YOU FEEL THE BEAT, YEAH ♪

♪ TURN IT UPSIDE DOWN ♪

- I'M GOING TO SHOW THE JUDGES
THAT I'M FUNNY, FABULOUS,

AND THAT I HAVE A GREAT NOSE.

- ♪ WHEN THE GUITAR PLAYER
STARTS PLAYING ♪

♪ WITH THE SYNCOPATED RHYTHM ♪

♪ WITH THE SCRATCH,
SCRATCH, SCRATCH ♪

♪ MAKES ME WANT TO MOVE ♪

- I AM LOOKING AT THOSE JUDGES
DEAD IN THEIR EYE

AND GETTING
THAT GLANCE RIGHT BACK.

THIS IS WHAT YOU PAID FOR,
AND I'M GIVING YOU EXTRA.

♪ RAT TAT, TAT, TAT, TAT, TAT
ON THE DRUM ♪

♪ HEY, WHOA ♪

♪ TURN THE BEAT AROUND ♪

♪ LOVE TO HEAR PERCUSSION ♪

- WHOO!

- ♪ TURN THE BEAT AROUND
TURN IT AROUND, YEAH ♪

♪ LOVE TO HEAR PERCUSSION ♪

[APPLAUSE]

- [LAUGHS]

- WHOO!

- ALL RIGHT, LADIES,
I'VE MADE MY DECISION.

DARIENNE LAKE,
SHANTE, YOU STAY.

YOU MAY JOIN THE OTHER GIRLS.

- THANK YOU.

- MAGNOLIA CRAWFORD,
YOU HIT A WALL,

BUT THERE'S ONE THING
I KNOW FOR SURE--

YOU CAN'T KEEP A GOOD HO DOWN.

NOW, SASHAY AWAY.

- THANK YOU.

IT'S A SHAME THEY DIDN'T GET
TO LOVE ME AS MUCH AS I LOVE ME.

YEAH, I MIGHT HAVE COME ACROSS
A LITTLE ABRASIVE.

THE THING IS, ALL PUBLICITY
IS GOOD PUBLICITY.

SO, I'M GOING
TAKE IT AND RUN WITH IT.

PEACE THE FUCK OUT.

- CONDRAGULATIONS, LADIES.

ENJOY THIS MOMENT,

BECAUSE THERE ARE
6 MORE FIERCE QUEENS

READY TO SNATCH THE CROWN.

BITCHES BETTER BEWARE.

- OH, FUCK.

THE 6 OTHER BITCHES.

- IT'S LIKE TWO PRIDES OF LIONS

MEETING EACH OTHER
ON THE SERENGETI.

- THIS IS LIKE "THE OUTSIDERS."

I'M FROM AZUSA, OKAY?

I KNOW HOW STREET FIGHTS
GET DOWN.

- THEY'RE ALL TRYING
A LITTLE TOO HARD FOR MY TASTES,

ESPECIALLY
THAT KIMORA LEE KARDASHIAN.

I DON'T LIKE THEM.
DON'T LIKE THEM.