Rome (2005–2007): Season 2, Episode 4 - Testudo et Lepus (The Tortoise and the Hare) - full transcript

I want music. Bring the flute girl.
Down with the gripes, domina.
The lyre player, then.
He died the last Lupercalia, domina.
I have been looking for a replacement,
but they are very expensive at the moment.
There's no music at all?
Althea sings well.
Does she?
Althea, sing something.
I don't...
Don't mumble. Do you know Crown Of Sappho?
Yes, domina.
Well, go on, then.
Help me.
Help me.
Poison. It must have been.
- You didn't. - I did. I swear.
One of father's litter bearers.
It was beastly fun. Penis like a horse.
I don't want to wake mother.
I don't know why you're so scared of her.
- She seems harmless enough to me. - You don't know her.
What was that?
No.
Mother!
- Octavia. - Gods.
What's her name again?
Jocasta.
She's a bad influence.
Oh, I say.
What are you doing? Who is this?
One of the servants tried to poison me.
What have you been doing to the servants that they want to murder you?
Nothing. This is Servilia's work.
With Antony gone, she thinks she can just do as she pleases.
If you know it's her, why are you torturing him?
Because it isn't a legal confession unless there's torture.
You must take Servilia to court.
No, I'm gonna kill her.
If I get taken to court for it, I can always claim it was self-defense.
I'm thinking ahead, you see?
This is wrong in so many ways I don't know where to start.
Well, what would you have me do?
Who would protect us if I didn't?
I...I'm... If you don't mind.
No, don't go. I need you as an independent witness.
Take her away.
Timon, is this gonna take all night?
He's out again. Bring him round.
Wait.
Give me a name, boy.
Give me a name and I will spare your life.
You want to live, don't you?
Tell me, then. For your life.
Servilia.
Servilia.
There, that wasn't so hard, was it?
After you've killed him,
dispose of the body discreetly.
Forgive me. I did not know that boy was corrupt.
I will take my life if I must,
but please know that I've been faithful.
Damned blood. It'll stain my dress.
I was misled and I failed you miserably.
Punish me as you see fit.
It would serve you right to be gelded.
As you wish, domina.
And I would, you know, if eunuchs were not so unfashionable.
Let's just forget about the whole thing.
Thank you, domina. Thank you.
Just get up, you silly man.
Next time you want a boy, buy one at the market.
Any fool knows not to pick one up from the streets.
Thank you, domina.
Go.
And bring me some bread and cheese.
I'm absolutely starving.
- What's your name, friend? - I'm not your friend.
A man's got a right to know the name of his murderer.
Timon.
You're a Jew, ain't you?
- That's not a Jew name. - That's my name for business purposes.
- Listen, Timon... - Don't bother.
Servilia, she's as rich as your woman there.
She'll pay you good money if you spare me.
Well, I doubt it. What good are you to her now?
She's very fond of me. She loves me, practically.
She loves me.
Well, I expect she'll get over it.
Here we are.
Please, I have money of my own.
I'll pay you whatever.
Please, don't kill me.
Please, I beg you. I'm only 16.
We done for tonight, boss? I've got a woman waiting.
Yes. We're done.
See you later, then.
Don't listen to your uncle. He's teasing.
Close your mouth, please. Put your mouth away, please.
That was really, really nice. Thank you so much.
Lord, protect us.
What has happened?
Nothing. Business.
Business? Can you not at least
wash off your business before returning home?
Why? I'm not ashamed of it.
Children, go and play outside.
- Stay where you are. - Brother...
I'm their father, not you.
You don't tell my children what to do.
Go.
Go!
It's all right, babies. Papa's just tired.
What?
Speak, then. Tell me.
Look at yourself.
Look at what you have become. You are an animal.
My righteous brother.
Did he tell you of his righteous life back in Judea?
Did you tell her about that, brother?
I've changed my ways.
Thieving, gambling, chasing whores.
- Stop it. - It's the truth.
Are you going to start speaking the truth now?
Because that I would find interesting!
No? I didn't think so.
She deserves better.
Too bad for her, then. This is what she's got.
These treacheries you do for that Roman witch,
does she pay you enough?
I get what I need.
She must lavish you with jewels and gold.
What a rich man my brother is.
Tell me, where do you hide such fantastic wealth?
We both sell what we have to these people.
All Rome's wealth is not enough to buy what Hashem has given me.
Again with Hashem.
Let Hashem make me a living.
The money that witch pays me bought this fucking house,
this fucking table, and that fucking dress my wife wears!
- That makes you proud? - Proud as any free Roman.
You breathe this fetid air of Rome,
but you are not Roman.
You walk her beshitted streets, you speak her mongrel language,
but you're not Roman. You're a Jew.
You may forget that, they never will.
You speak so much and know so little.
Look at me.
Do you hate your name so much to invite this shame?
Think of your family.
Look at me!
Try it, come on! Try it! Hit me!
Hit me!
That's it. Not so easy to beat me any more, is it?
I'm not your little brother any more.
Yesh. Yesh!
In the north, the great army
under the leadership of the generals Hirtius and Pansa
assisted by Caesar Octavian
is about to engage with the forces of the traitor
Mark Antony.
All citizens are requested to make offerings
for the success of our heroic soldiers.
Long live the Republic!
Get into line now!
Vorenus.
Titus Pullo?
Well, don't tell me you've taken up scavenging.
Who's that?
Do you not know me, Pullo?
Is that you, young master?
It's fine.
We're old friends.
Octavian.
They call me Caesar now, Pullo.
All grown up. Always knew you had it in you.
You won, then?
So it seems.
How? I mean no offence.
I can't take much credit.
The legions under Hirtius and Pansa did heroic work.
The rest I owe to Agrippa.
Anyroad, congratulations.
Thank you. What brings you here, Pullo?
You didn't take part in the fighting either from the look of you.
Vorenus left Rome with Antony.
I hoped to find him before the battle started.
I came to tell him that his children are not dead.
But now I must see if he is dead himself.
We must find him, then.
I'll have my tribunes personally search among the wounded.
Thank you. I can hardly expect...
Nonsense. If you don't find him here, you'd do well to comb the Cisalpine hills.
Antony and his men have skulked off there.
Courier.
Take the road north.
Should anyone challenge your passage
you show them the seal of Caesar.
Warn them of the consequences.
You'll need fresh rations and a fast horse.
Agrippa's men will see to it.
Thank you, sir.
The conquering heroes return.
Another brilliant poem, Maecenas?
Is there not something useful you might do?
Victory is not victory until it has a song.
What news from the medics on Hirtius and Pansa?
Dead of their wounds, I'm afraid, both of them.
Poor souls.
To die in the hour of their glory.
Very sad.
But convenient.
The victory is now ours alone.
Couldn't have worked out better, frankly.
You really taught that old bully a proper lesson.
It was not a personal matter.
It was necessary for the good of the Republic.
Of course. Of course.
Agrippa, I've got letters I'm going to want you to take on ahead to Rome.
The first goes to my sister.
Octavia?
I only have the one sister, Agrippa.
Make sure you put it directly into her hand.
My mother has a habit of stealing mail.
The next goes to Cicero.
Why send a general to do a courier's work?
That's all right. I am happy to go.
I'm asking Cicero for a triumph.
He'll know I'm serious if Agrippa is there looking...
grim and soldierly.
I wish you would tell them to do that further away.
It gives me a fright every time.
Your troops are gathering.
Time to give them a speech.
Right. Which speech do you think?
The one about money.
Gentlemen...
we have done our work well.
We have gained a victory that will live on in history forever.
We have saved the Republic
from those who threatened her.
Rome is now in our debt.
And we are owed a great deal of money.
So while Antony drags the remnants of his men
to the frozen north,
I thought we might head south to Rome.
What do you say?
Is it time to tell the Senate to pay up?
Well, then, to Rome!
- Mars! Mars! - Exulte! Exulte!
Vorenus?
I'm looking for Prefect Vorenus.
A bag of salt for any man that helps me.
Lucius Vorenus.
I'm looking for Lucius Vorenus.
Vorenus?
Vorenus?
What are you doing here?
Your children are alive.
Take him over there, lads.
Move it on up there.
Eighth Cohort lost two full maniples.
Ninth, almost wiped out. Tenth Cohort intact.
The Fourth Legion's much worse, sir.
They suffered the full brunt of the attack.
Yes, yes.
How many dead in total?
8,000 men, sir, give or take.
8,000?
Oh, do cheer up. You're still alive, aren't you?
I do hope so. If this is the afterlife, it is extremely disappointing.
Disband the Fourth Cohort
and use the survivors to reinforce the Third.
We're heading north.
I want to establish a base camp in the mountain before the first snowfall.
Yes, sir.
And, Tribune, don't look so damn grim.
- Set an example. - Yes, sir.
- Sorry, sir. - Off you go.
What are you doing back there?
You stitching me up or making a dress? Will you hurry up, man?
A base camp in the mountains, is that wise?
General Posca speaks. Do you have a better idea?
While we still have the semblance of an army,
I would've thought we should offer terms.
Terms? Of surrender?
That's fucking slave talk.
No, we will have no more of that.
North to the mountains, then. And after that?
I'll think of something.
God damn it, man!
- General Antony, sir. - Vorenus.
Requesting permission to leave the legion, sir.
Now that is a real soldier for you.
Most men just slip away into the night.
But this one,
he asks permission before he deserts me.
Well, what is it?
It's my children, sir.
They're alive and in slavery.
Good news, bad news.
I must find them, sir.
All right.
The number of good men I've lost today,
one more isn't gonna make any difference.
Thank you, sir.
One more thing, boys!
Be sure to tell everyone you meet
that Mark Antony is not defeated.
He will return,
and all those that defied him shall pay!
That fucking little brat Octavian
shall be first!
You hear me, boys?
Will do, chief.
Word from Patara.
They've capitulated to our demands. They send 16,000 talents.
- How many troops? - 7,000.
And Lycia?
No word as yet, but I imagine they will follow suit.
See that they do.
We must be up to eight legions now.
Nine. 25,000 infantry,
10,000 cavalry.
Almost a match for Antony.
It's good.
It's very good.
Well, you look magnificent.
You should have your portrait done.
No, no time for such vanity.
It would please your mother.
It would, wouldn't it?
O holy and blessed lady,
perpetual comfort of humankind,
who by thy bounty and grace nourishes the whole world,
and bears a great compassion to the troubles of the miserable
as a loving mother would,
you are she that is the natural mother
of all things,
the mistress and governess of all the elements,
first of the gods celestial,
light of the goddesses.
O holy and blessed lady, perpetual comfort of humankind,
who by thy bounty and grace nourishes the whole world
and bears a great compassion to the troubles of the miserable
as a loving mother would.
O holy and blessed lady,
perpetual comfort of humankind,
who by thy bounty and grace nourishes the whole world,
and bears a great compassion to the troubles of the miserable
as a loving mother would,
you are she who is the natural mother to all things,
the mistress and the governess of all the elements.
You know why you're here, don't you?
Atia.
Your boy confessed everything.
Are you too afraid to speak?
You weren't so quiet when I was in your power.
You were very talkative then.
"A slow and painful death."
That's what you promised me.
That's what you deserve.
You think you're so fucking superior, don't you?
You have no idea what I think.
No? Well, tell me.
Tell me what you think.
I think...
you're a sad, lonely little creature.
I think at this moment,
you're more afraid than I am.
I've never been happier in my life.
Then why do you keep talking?
Kill me.
When you kiss my feet,
beg for me to end your suffering,
then I'll kill you.
Do as you like.
Timon.
You think it's me you degrade now,
but it's not.
It's you.
As long as you live
you will feel degraded and defiled by this.
You.
Get on with it.
Have you had enough?
Have you had enough?
Continue.
What do you want me to do?
I don't know.
Do something. Cut off her face.
Do it.
Mother Isis protect me. Mother Isis protect me.
Get up!
Get up! Get up!
- What are you doing? - Go!
Go!
I am not an animal!
I am not a fucking animal!
So, brother...
It's getting cooler. Be dark soon.
Good time to set up camp, maybe.
You may camp if you want. I'm not stopping.
So you can still talk.
Thought maybe you'd forgotten how.
I talk when I need to. There's nothing to say.
Still angry with me, then?
No.
Yes, well, listen.
I'll get to the nub of it. About Niobe...
What of her?
What I said back in the collegium about me and her,
I never... we never.
I only said it to make you angry. That's all.
That's the truth, and you know that.
I know.
Had to be said.
Even if I wanted to - which I didn't -
she's not that type of woman.
I know women, and she's not that type.
Yon cunt Evander took advantage.
If it's any consolation,
I gave him a right session before I killed him.
Screamed like a stuck pig.
Good. Thank you.
You ever seen one of these slave camps?
No.
It's not pretty.
They'll be different now, the children.
I know.
I don't think you do, though.
You can't unless you've been there.
The things I saw...
Anyroad, they'll be different.
- You should be ready. - I don't care what they're like.
I just...
want them back.
All I'm saying is...
best be gentle.
I will.
And the boy?
Lucius?
You're not thinking of killing him, are you?
Honor demands that he die.
True. Fair enough. Honor demands it.
Most likely won't sit well with the girls though,
if you do kill him.
You talk too much.
We all have our faults.
Octavian won?
He has.
Antony and the remains of his army have retreated to the mountains.
Are they both unharmed?
Octavian is very well.
Antony's alive, but we know no more than that.
Your brother will return with his army.
He'll be here within the month.
With his army? Why with his army?
Politics.
He wants you to know that whatever happens in the future,
he will always protect you.
But you must accept his protection and his advice.
That's very kind of him.
He will look after me after I swear him my allegiance?
I am not one of his soldiers.
I'm sure he does not doubt you.
I think he means you to convey the same message to your mother.
Better it comes from you.
Yes. Probably so.
Your brother means you only the best.
If it were otherwise, I would not deliver the message.
I'd sooner die than cause you pain.
I hope you live a long life, then.
I...
If I may, I am compelled to speak.
Ever since I met you, my soul has burned...
So is my brother eating properly?
He would starve himself unless someone forces him to eat.
Yes. Yes.
Army food agrees with him.
He's not stout exactly, but, yes, eating properly.
Sorry. Sorry about just now.
I very expressly did not mean to do that.
I blurted it out anyhow. I should've written a letter.
Anyhow, sorry.
There's no need to apologize.
Any friend of my brother is my brother also.
I'm sure when I know you better
we shall be good friends.
That's most gracious of you.
A horrid imposition on my part.
Of course, you barely know me. Ridiculous.
Octavia, I've been looking for you everywhere.
Marcus Agrippa, what are you doing here?
Mother...
Octavian...
No, it's all right. It's all right.
He's unharmed. He won.
Antony was defeated.
He's fled north.
This is wonderful news. Amazing.
I had hopes, of course, but I hardly expected this.
Wonderful.
What of Hirtius and Pansa?
Dead in battle.
Dead?
That's unfortunate.
Still, a great victory.
Read on.
His army?
He's bringing his army to Rome? Why?
He has no enemies in Rome. Why bring his army?
I am just a messenger.
I'm sure when he arrives, Caesar will be happy to tell you.
Caesar, he calls himself.
Another Caesar.
Just what we need.
He calls himself Caesar because that is his name by right.
Yes, yes, no doubt.
Gods, I'm so tired of young men and their ambitions.
So tired.
I assure you,
he has only the interests of the Republic at heart.
I'm sure he believes that.
I thought the same when I was a young man.
But it is all vanity, you know.
All vanity.
This is the place.
Let me do the talking.
Salve, friend.
Can you point us in the direction of the procurator's office?
What do you wanna know him for?
Business.
Looking for some runaways.
Slave catchers, are you?
Something like that.
Camp's closed to unauthorized visitors.
That right?
Good bounty on runaways.
Be worth something to you, I expect, letting you in.
Listen to me, you little weasel...
My friend's a thrifty one, but we're all men of commerce.
Which way is the boss man?
Round the bend, straight on, house with a red door.
Oh, leave off!
He's bloody dead!
Uncouple 'em!
Told you I should do the talking.
Grunt scum.
Your spit dries fast here, brother.
Best to save it.
Come on!
You the man in charge?
Buying or selling?
Titus Pullo, Lucius Vorenus.
Here to retrieve some runaways. Heard they got sold to your camp.
- Two girls. - And a boy.
Got papers for 'em?
- Not with us. - Bill of sale?
No.
Two soldiers out for some young cunny, yes?
Shut your fucking mouth.
Hold. Hold.
What's his problem?
I didn't want to have to go into this, but...
these children are the private property
of Gaius Caesar Octavian himself.
He likes to have them serve morning biscuits in bed.
Especially the boy. Got it now?
Oh, that's ripe. Good story.
You see this seal?
His orders for us to come find his slaves.
What is it, an otter?
It's a fucking sphinx. Mark of Caesar.
- Odd wax, this. - Mud from Mutina.
That's why my friend here is in fighting kit.
Straight from the battlefield.
It's that urgent.
Caesar.
Caesar.
The one who just beat Mark Antony.
What do you think he'd make of a little fellow like you who crosses him?
Yes, that's all very well,
but what if you are lying to me?
Are you calling me a liar?
Check the rolls.
Daughter...
it's me.
It's your father.
You're not slave catchers.
Where is she?
The other one.
Where's my daughter?