Riverdale (2016–…): Season 4, Episode 12 - Chapter Sixty-Nine: Men of Honor - full transcript

Betty and Alice embark on a new investigation; Archie digs deeper into his uncle's dark past; Veronica reconnects with an old friend.

[JUGHEAD] "Honor."

It's a word that gets thrown
around a lot at Stonewall Prep.

Mr. Weston Wallis,

you have been challenged
to a duel by Mr. Jones,

who has invoked arcane
Stonewall Prep tradition.

Do you accept?

That'd be a yes.

Very good.

What about fencing?

Oh, can we just bare-knuckle brawl?

May I suggest that you do both.



And in case of a tie-breaker...

A battle of intellect.

A chess match.

Excellent.

Then it is settled.

You may both now choose a second

for moral and tactical support.

I pick Jonathan.

I'll choose Donna.

And may the best man win.

I'm assuming you've
never held a saber before.

[IMPERCEPTIBLE]

Lucky for you, I'm an excellent coach,

and Bret is decidedly
mediocre with a sword.



[FRANK] Hey, by the
way, I meant to ask you,

when does your mom get back?

She's wrapping up a case.

- Couple more days, she says.
- Got you.

[DOOR OPENS]

Hey, can we help you?

[MAN SNIFFS]

Holy hell.

Ted Bishop.

How are you, Frank?

Hey.

What the hell are you doing here?

It's, uh...

It's bad news.

I'm making the rounds. I wanted
to tell you guys in person.

Greg died.

- [SIGHS]
- Yeah, he had cancer.

- [EXCLAIMS]
- Rotted his guts.

After everything else...

Hmm.

I'm sorry. Uh...

Archie, this is Ted
Bishop. We served together.

Ted, this is my nephew, Archie.

- Oh.
- Hey.

[CHUCKLES] Fred's kid. Nice to meet you.

Same.

We were just calling
it quits for the day,

if you wanna join us for dinner.

Yeah. How about it, Ted?

Yeah, all right.

[SIGHS]

FYI,

Smithers and I are road-tripping
to New York tomorrow.

Oh? What's the occasion?

I have an interview at Barnard
College, if you must know.

And, of course, I'll be going
on a shopping spree beforehand

to find the right outfit to impress.

Well, that's perfect timing. Your
mother and I were just planning

our own trip to New York.

- Seriously?
- Yeah.

I have a few business
meetings I've been putting off.

And I'm having lunch with the
girls at Cafe des Creatifs.

And don't worry, mija,

as soon as we reach Manhattan,
we'll go our separate ways.

Fine.

But New York is my town.

Not yours.

[BELL RINGING]

Fangs, tell me you're
not selling drugs again.

[WHISPERS] Toni,

so Kevin and I started this little...

side hustle.

Don't worry. It's
nothing illegal, per se.

What kind of side hustle?

It looks lucrative as hell. Is this...

something I can get in on?

The nerve of that man!

Who does he think he is?

What happened, Mom?
What did Mr. Honey say?

Your principal refuses to
believe that I acted alone.

That's typical.

What's the punishment?

Well, honey, you're suspended for a week

and stripped of your editor-in-chief
duties at the Blue and Gold.

- Oh, my God.
- And barred from attending senior prom

for some ungodly reason.

Oh, and that Bret
Weston Wallis character,

he's filing a restraining
order against you,

claiming that he "fears for his life."

What, Bret is afraid of me? Why?

[SIGHS] Apparently, you cracked
open his head with a golf club.

Oh, right. I did do that.

What's this?

My latest murder board.

[ALICE] Who got murdered?

Mr. Chipping. Maybe.

We let the case get cold.

But we know Bret's a total sociopath.

So let's find out if he's a killer too.

So there was an ambush
near the city center.

And they sent us in
to extract any wounded.

I end up walking down a blind alley.

I get hit in both legs, and I go down.

But he got me out of there.

It wasn't till we got back to
the aid station I saw that Frank,

he'd been hit four times himself.

But, hey,

you got a Red Badge of Courage
for saving my ass, right?

I got lucky. That's all.

Hmm.

Well, boys, uh,

I appreciate the warm
meal and hospitality,

but it's time I ship out.

You could stay here,
if you want, Mr. Bishop.

My mom's out of town.
There's plenty of room.

Well, so long as I'm
not putting anyone out.

No, you're not.

[ALICE] My, what a tangled web.

And you think this Bret
character is behind it all?

He's definitely the leader of the pack.

Okay. Well, where do we begin?

We have missing students, evil preppies,

dead writers, a teacher's suicide.

Apparent suicide. Chipping
didn't leave a note.

And even though
Jughead's classmate Donna

has painted a very
incriminating portrait of him,

I don't think she's telling the truth.

Well, then that's where we start.

Tell me, Elizabeth,

is there a Mrs. Chipping?

Hey, where's the fire?

Sorry. I'm gonna be late for school.

Ted, don't be a stranger.
Hope to see you again soon.

Yeah, same here.

See you.

He's a good kid.

He is.

He's just like his father was.

All right, listen, why
don't you finish up,

and then I'll drive
you to the bus station.

Sounds good.

[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]

Hello?

[JUNE] Frank, it's June.
Listen, I don't have...

- June?
- [STATIC SCRATCHING]

- Whoa, slow down.
- Duckie was murdered.

- Wait.
- He said something about...

What happened to Duckie?

[JUNE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

I don't understand. How can he be
dead too? That doesn't make any...

[BOTH GRUNTING]

[KNIFE CLATTERS]

What the hell's going on?

[BOTH PANTING]

I forgot my phone.

I'm sorry, Archie. I usually have
an instinct about these things.

Uncle Frank, why the hell is one
of your friends trying to kill you?

After the war, I was hard up.

Ted reached out, and he told
me about this security gig.

It paid well, hired
vets, no questions asked.

The thing is, it was a
private paramilitary contract,

and they sent us all over the world...

as mercenaries.

Okay, so why come after you?

My guess is the company's
tying up loose ends.

Maybe they're about to be exposed.
Ted's still on their payroll.

So get ahead of this.

You come forward and blow
the lid off these mercenaries.

It's not that easy, Archie.

I was a part of it.

I did things. I...

followed orders.

All right. Then we need
to get you out of town.

No.

It's too dangerous.

Anybody he comes into contact
with in this town is at risk now.

And he's not gonna leave until I'm dead.

So, in that case, we need backup.

No way.

No, Uncle Frank, trust me.

This guy can help.

Thank you for coming to
see us, Mrs. Chipping.

We can't even imagine how
hard this has been for you.

And we promise, we're just here to help.

The first question is the hardest.

The answer is "no."

I absolutely do not believe my husband

was having an affair with that student.

And, Rupert, he had his problems,
but he never cheated on me.

Not ever.

What kind of problems?

Drinking more than usual,

complaining about the
Baxter Brothers books.

Wishing he'd never gotten the contract.

Wasn't he proud to be a
Baxter Brothers writer?

In the beginning.

But then, as the years went on, he, um,

felt like he had an
albatross around his neck.

But hadn't he just
finished his last book?

Why...

kill himself if he was
so close to being done?

I don't know.

I just... I don't know.

[BREATH TREMBLING]

And I, um...

I brought a box of his personal effects

from when I cleaned out his office.

I can't make sense of any of it.

But maybe you can.

We'll try, Mrs. Chipping.

What does any of this mean?

Why does Mr. Chipping
have army pamphlets?

Unless...

Wait a minute.

So a highly trained mercenary tried
to kill you two in the kitchen,

and now he's in hiding,
waiting to strike again?

- Is that about right?
- I'm his target, not Archie.

I don't want anyone paying
for my mistakes but me.

I know what it's like when
the past comes knocking.

As a vet

and as a Serpent, I've been in a couple

of barfights with these ultramarine types.

They're tough bastards, but

I've held my own against them.

Can you lure him out, Uncle Frank?

It would have to be somewhere
under our complete control.

We got that. The gym.

[EXHALES]

All right.

All right. I'll get him there.

[FRANCIS] Your weapons, gentlemen.

First to three points wins.

Now,

en garde.

And begin.

- [STUDENTS EXCLAIMING]
- A hit on Mr. Jones. Point to Weston Wallis.

Begin.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Point to Mr. Jones. One to one.

And begin.

A hit on Mr. Jones. Point
to Weston Wallis. Two to one.

Begin.

[SOFTLY] No.

[FRANCIS] The match is over.

- Weston Wallis is our victor.
- [STUDENTS CHEERING]

[PANTING]

Well, well, well, if
it isn't Katy Keene.

- Hi. Oh!
- It's so good to see you.

It has been way too long, girl.

[CHUCKLES] I know something that
is gonna make you even happier.

I hear that the new Proenza Schouler
collection on the fourth floor

is to die for.

I can't wait. I need to ooze collegiate

cuteness at this interview tomorrow.

Well, I have already scoped
out some Barnard-ready options.

Well, good thing I'm armed
with my mother's Lacy's card.

If that's the case, I know
exactly where to start. Come on.

Oh, I don't want this
"Rainbow High" montage to end.

Who says it has to?

We can leave our bags with
Smithers and just keep going.

Wait. Do you like drag?

My friend Jorge and I always sneak into

this little dive bar called Molly's Crisis.

Sounds amazing.

[METAL DETECTOR BEEPING]

I'm unarmed.

I keep my word.

Good.

We don't want any unnecessary bloodshed.

But just so you know, Ted,
the same way you came after me,

they're gonna send someone after you.

Probably.

But I don't get paid to think like that.

I get paid to follow orders.

I'm sorry it's gotta
end like this, buddy.

But...

[GRUNTS] I'll make it painless.

And none of your loved
ones will be harmed.

- I swear.
- Ted,

I'm sorry too, brother.

[WHISTLES]

[DOORS OPENING]

You broke the code, Frank.

You can't break something that's
already been shattered to bits, Ted.

And you're the one coming after me.

- Hands up! On the ground.
- You broke the code, Frank.

All bets are off now.

You're all fair game.

Get some sleep.

At 0800, you got a date with the Feds.

Hmm.

What about Frank Andrews?

He's a mercenary, too.

Who?

I don't know anyone by that name.

[CHUCKLES]

[SLOW POP SONG PLAYING]

[KNOCKING AT DOOR]

Welcome to the Maple Club.

Now this is my kind of joint.

I'm Antoinette.

And what brings you to our
establishment this evening,

Mr...

St. Clair.

I'm looking to throw a small
bash for myself and some pals

to celebrate the fact that
we all got into Harvard.

And a chum told me about this place.

And, from the looks of it,

it seems like we'd
have a good time here.

That, you would.

How about I talk you through some of

Maple Club's offerings and options?

[BETTY] Moose, who gave
you the army pamphlets?

After the article airing, all
my dirty laundry was published,

I mean, I was... I was pretty messed up.

[BETTY] Hmm.

And Mr. Chipping suggested
I look into the military.

I'm sorry, what's your
connection to Mr. Chipping?

He recruited me. To play football.

Wait. Mr. Chipping's the reason
why you went to Stonewall Prep?

Yeah.

And what's weird is, after
the story about me came out,

he was encouraging me to leave.

Until Halloween night, when it
became more than a suggestion.

I mean, he practically
shoved me out the door.

Plus, um,

there was a videotape.

What videotape?

Uh, Bret videotaped me having sex
in our dorm room with a classmate.

He was lording it over me and
threatening to release it any minute.

[STAMMERS] I'm sorry.

Bret videotaped you having
sex in your dorm room?

He said it would be a good
addition to his collection.

Breaking and entering, is
this normal for you, Elizabeth?

Kind of. But it's not really
breaking and entering, Mom.

I mean, this is Jughead's room, too.

And he said I could come
here whenever I wanted, so...

Like when all the preppy
scumbags are in class.

Not quite all.

What the hell are you doing here?

Looking for the dirt that
you have on Moose Mason.

I know you filmed him
having sex to extort him.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

I have no idea what you and, I'm assuming,

your mother are referring to, Ponytail.

Does Moose have this supposed sex tape?

No, he says that you
do, in a collection.

Where is it? Because it's
certainly not in this room.

Question,

did Mason ever lay eyes
on this alleged collection?

Question,

do you have a tape of me and Jughead?

[GASPS] Oh, my God!

Mom, calm down.

Moose said that it was
filmed in this room.

Did you tape us, too?

Again, I don't know what
you're talking about.

I don't have any tapes like that.

But if I did,

it sure is a good thing
that I'm such a nice guy

because I could really do a
number on you by releasing it.

Leave now, and I won't tell Jones
about this latest escapade of yours,

or you could come with
me to Chemistry class,

and we could tell him together.

So, assuming that you get
into Barnard next year,

which you totally will,

is Archie moving here
with you next year?

That's still very much up in the air.

Honestly,

I don't think Riverdale
could survive without him.

Well, there's always long distance.

Totally, and that's what my best
friend Betty and her beau are doing,

and they're making it work, so...

What about you and your brawny boxer?

- KO?
- Mmm-hmm.

Well, we are a real thing now.

[CHUCKLES] I know. He's...

He's the best.

You know, I remember

the first time you held hands with him.

It was at my quinceanera at the Plaza.

And you told me his palms were sweaty

because he was so nervous.

Oh, my God. That is so embarrassing.

I can't believe you remember that.

All I remember is that the
Jonas Brothers performed.

And, of course, how stunning you looked.

Yeah, because you and
your mom made the dress.

The dress that launched this
beautiful, unexpected relationship.

How is your mother? How is her shop?

Veronica, my mom's really sick.

And she's getting
treatments, and she's...

Oh, she's being so strong.

But, um...

They... They caught it
late, so we're just...

We're not sure what's gonna happen.

[SIGHS] She's my best friend, Veronica.

Katy.

Ugh, I'm sorry. [SNIFFLES]

Didn't wanna tell you.
I didn't wanna cry today.

Are you kidding me?

What are old friends for if not
to provide shoulders to cry on?

Come here.

I love you, Katy Keene.

You're gonna be okay, I promise.

Where are you gonna go?

Head up to Canada. Maybe find
my way to Alaska, get some work.

I just gotta get as far
off the radar as possible

until this whole thing blows over.

If Ted can find me, others can, too.

Uncle Frank, can't you just talk
to the Feds, explain what happened?

Maybe if you turn yourself
in, they'll go easy on you.

Yeah, or maybe they make me the
scapegoat who goes down for all this.

Those tend to be the breaks
I get in life, Archie.

But if you go on the run now,
you'll never stop running.

Man, you remind me so
much of your old man.

You take care of your mom, okay?

Or I'll come back and kick your ass.

[SCOFFS] You can try.

Babe, what happened to
you today? You ghosted me.

Do you remember that
Patrick-Bateman-type from earlier today

- at the Maple Club?
- Mmm.

- You mean, Nick St. Clair?
- [EXHALES]

Sophomore year,

Nick came to Riverdale one
weekend looking for a party.

He...

spiked my champagne,

and...

coaxed me back to his
room at the Five Seasons,

where...

he attempted to assault me.

- What?
- Thankfully,

Veronica and Josie and the
Pussycats came to my rescue.

I thought I'd worked through it.

Emotionally.

But seeing him today, it...

Triggered you.

I get it.

A similar experience happened to
me before I moved to Riverdale.

Oh, TT.

I'm so sorry. What did you do?

How did you cope?

It took me a while, but,

with a lot of help, I worked through it.

[EXHALES]

And, babe, I wanna
help you get there too.

Gentlemen, we'll go seven rounds.

We're not gonna need rounds.

No, all we'll need
is a coffin for Jones.

Like the one I buried
him in way back when.

Round one begins now.

[STUDENTS EXCLAIM]

That's not bad, Bret.

[STUDENTS EXCLAIMING]

Oh.

Well, he's got a glass jaw.

Told you we weren't gonna need rounds.

Mr. Jones is the winner.

The duel is officially tied.

Tomorrow's chess match will
decide the ultimate winner.

Oh, crap!

[KEYS JINGLING]

A dead snake. Really?

And body checks in the hall?

Since when does Bret
even have so many friends?

He doesn't.

It's pack behavior.

Bret's home-grown. He's a
Stonie through and through.

Easy to root for.

And, think about it, if
you win and Bret loses,

if he's not a man of honor,
what does that say about them?

So, what, this entire
school is against me now?

Not the entire school, Jones.

You still got me.

[ALICE] If that tape exists...

We have to find it.

Agreed.

But we can't search the whole school.

What if Bret stores his collection

in the room where they have
those secret society meetings?

In Stonewall Prep's basement.

Okay.

But we didn't fare so well
breaking into their dorms.

No, but Jughead still
has one last challenge.

We can slip into the basement
while he's keeping Bret busy.

[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]

Hey, Mr. Jones, what's up?

Red, we got a problem. Ted escaped.

Wherever you are, you have
to get somewhere safe ASAP.

What? How the hell did he escape?

He just about snapped Tubby in two.

Get yourself to safety, okay?

Okay. Bye.

- [DOOR SQUEAKS OPEN]
- Ted?

[BOTH GRUNTING]

[TED GROANS]

What the hell is happening?

[ARCHIE PANTING]

This school is insane.

- [GASPS]
- Are you okay?

Yeah. [COUGHS]

[GRUNTING]

[ARCHIE GASPING]

How...

I thought you were gone.

I had a gut feeling
this wasn't over, Archie.

But it is now.

[SLOW ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

Refill?

You read my mind, sweetheart.

Maybe you'd like to enjoy
it with me in a private room.

[MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING IN DISTANCE]

You little minx.

Relax,

drink up, and, uh,

I'm gonna get a little more comfortable.

Okay?

[BETTY] You're gonna mop
the floor with him, Jug.

Yeah, I hope so.

I just have to stay focused if I'm gonna

wipe that smug smile off Bret's face.

Where is the match?

Uh, same place as all the
other ones. The seminar room.

At what time?

[BRET] I wanna raise the stakes.

When I win, you walk away from
the Baxter Brothers contract.

To what end?

The restoration of the rightful
natural order of the world.

You lose, you slink away and
are never heard from again.

Just like your grandfather.

And Mr. DuPont gives the contract to me.

You wanna know what the
one problem with that is?

Hmm?

You're a terrible writer, Bret.

So, no, I'm not going
to accept your terms.

This is a duel about honor.

And when you lose,

it's going to be because

I'm a better writer.

I'm a better competitor.

[WHISPERS] And I'm a better man.

So can we get this started already?

Indeed.

Gentlemen.

Play wisely.

[WHISPERS] Okay, come on.
Veronica said it was this way.

All right, Betty. You find
the tapes, I'll stand watch.

Okay.

Oh, my God.

Okay. Moose, Moose...

Oh, that works, too.

[WATCH BEEPING]

I'm sorry. Someone's broken
into the Quill and Skull's room.

What are you talking about?

Silent alarm. I have it synced
to alert me of any intruders.

Mr. DuPont, may I call a recess?

[STAMMERS] Yes, of course.

We'll resume the game
after this is cleared up.

Betty.

We have to go, now.

Okay.

All right.

[DOOR OPENING]

I almost admire your gumption, Ponytail,

but you're done. You're trespassing.

And you're illegally
recording people having sex.

And this is your tape of me and Jughead.

Whoa, whoa, wait.

What the hell is going on?

Your perv of a roommate
taped us in your bed, Jug.

Are you serious, Bret?

All the tapes in this
room are private property.

Consensual testimonies given by students

being inducted into the Quill and Skull.

The tape you're holding right now
is Jughead's initiation confession.

Confession...

I did make a confession.

Right. So I'll have my
private property back.

Excellent. Now, can we finish the match?

Wait. No, that allows
me to put you in...

Checkmate, yeah.

Why? Why would you do that?

'Cause I'm done playing this game, Bret.

That's game over, Mr. DuPont.

Bret wins this duel.

You are more of a Stonewall
man than I will ever be

or I'll ever want to be.

Let's blow this place.

All right. Thank you, Mr.
Jones, I appreciate it.

Okay. Bye.

The Feds picked up Ted.

He'll be tried for everything
he did in Riverdale.

He said they're looking for you, too.

Of course, they are.

My mom's the lawyer, not me,

but wouldn't it go better
if you turned yourself in?

You could cut a deal, maybe, too.

[SIGHS]

All right.

All right, Archie, I'll do it.
I'll turn myself in tomorrow.

I genuinely think this is the
right thing to do, Uncle Frank.

[HERMIONE] Veronica, your father
doesn't want me to tell you this,

but I think it's
important that you know.

We didn't go to New York on business.

We went to see a doctor.

A specialist.

He ran some tests,

and he confirmed that
your father has a disease.

What? What...

What kind of disease?

It's a neuromuscular disorder.

It will weaken your father.

His muscles will atrophy.

He'll lose his motor skills.

But there's good news.

We caught it early, so there's drugs

- and therapies.
- So he's...

going to be fine?

I don't know.

We just know that he's very...

[CRYING] He's very sick.

Mom.

[HERMIONE SOBBING]

What?

Where the hell am I?

Who the hell are you?

- I bet you say that to all the boys.
- [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

It's okay. Yeah. We understand.

Things got pretty wild last night.

[TONI] You wanna see?

You and the boys here
made a little video.

[NICK LAUGHING ON VIDEO]

Had enough?

[NICK] How could you?

You can't...

You better not show that to
anyone, you bitch, or I'm gonna...

Or you'll what, exactly?

Now listen up, worm,

because I'm only gonna say this once.

You don't know me.

But I know you.

And I know exactly what you did
to my girlfriend Cheryl Blossom

and what you've probably done to a lot

of other innocent young women.

You will never step
foot in Riverdale again.

You will not so much as even
think about Cheryl Blossom.

And you will never assault another woman

because, if you do,

I will let the whole world
see what was done to you.

I will ruin you.

[NICK LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY ON VIDEO]

Why are you tickling me?

[CONTINUES LAUGHING]

[ALL LAUGHING]

So... So Nick is what we in the tickle

business would call a
first-class squealer.

[ALL LAUGHING]

I propose a toast.

To Toni Topaz,

who slayed yet another
dragon from my past.

[ALL] Cheers! [LAUGHING]

I am, as always, one lucky lady.

[ARCHIE] Frank didn't even leave a note.

I'm sorry, Red.

I know you two got close.

Yeah, we did.

[SIGHS]

And can I tell you, Mr. Jones?

I knew he was gonna run.

Even when he told me
he wasn't, I just...

I felt it.

So, uh,

what's next?

- For Frank? He's probably halfway to Alaska.
- No, no.

I mean, for you.

I don't know.

[CHUCKLES]

My dad was a decent, good guy.

He worked hard. He loved
me. He loved his life.

I believe he slept
peacefully at night, you know?

Unless I was out doing
some dumbass thing.

Some days he won, and some days he lost.

But, usually, it was a draw,
and that was enough for him.

He was just a...

He was a simple man with honor.

Maybe that's what next for me.

Hmm.

Sounds like a good plan to me.

[SIGHS]

[CHINA CLINKING]

[BREATHES DEEPLY]

[VERONICA] Well, Mom,

Dad,

I know it's still months away,

but clear your schedules and mark
your calendars for August 15th,

a very special day.

Special in what way?

It's when Barnard welcomes
its incoming freshman class,

including a certain Veronica Lodge.

- [HERMIONE] Veronica!
- [LAUGHS]

You'll be moving me into my dorm.

[STAMMERS] I'm sorry.
Did you say "Lodge"?

Yes.

I did.

Going to New York, seeing Katy,

it reminded me of
something I was missing.

But no need to make a
federal case out of it, Daddy.

No.

Absolutely not, mija.

[BETTY] Any regrets
about throwing the match?

[JUGHEAD] No.

If I've learned anything
over these last couple days,

it's that I really don't have to
prove anything to these people.

They have no idea what true honor is.

And you are not a damsel in distress.

But I'll murder Bret if he
actually has a tape of us.

Speaking of tapes,

I did manage to sneak something
out of the Quill and Skull room.

A videotape labelled "Donna."

We were having an affair.

I knew it was wrong, and I didn't
want anybody to get into trouble,

so I tried to break it off with him.

But then he got...

aggressive.

Wait. What's going on?

This is exactly what Donna told
me about Mr. Chipping, except...

Wait for this part.

And I was so scared, I told him if he

didn't stop I'd go to the headmaster.

I'd never seen Mr. Kotter so mad.

Who's Mr. Kotter?

Based on my research,

no one. He doesn't exist.

Even more chilling, Donna is
100% using the same language,

even exactly the same
words that she used

when she told me about Mr. Chipping.

I didn't want anybody
to get into trouble.

So, I tried to break it off with him.

[BREATH HITCHES]
But then he got... aggressive.

- Meaning...
- She's lying, Jug.

This is a rehearsed speech
Donna has given at least twice.

All this time, I've been
thinking, we've been thinking,

that Bret's the evil mastermind
behind Stonewall Prep.

But I think we need to be
more worried about Donna.