Rita (2012–2020): Season 4, Episode 2 - Du bliver, hvad du spiser - full transcript

A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES

Isn't it time you found
something else to do?

I'm not going back to my old school,
damn it.

BAVNEGÅRD SCHOOL

Maybe it's cool going back to a place
where you had dreams.

It's difficult getting teachers
for a school like ours.

Back when you were here,
it was a different time.

Welcome, Rita.

Maybe you have a better suggestion
for how I should run my classes?

I'd probably leave
the confirmation suit at home.

PRINCIPAL



The local authority wants to close
a school.

I need some really good teachers.
When can you start?

Don't you have anyone you can team up
with? Sit with the others.

I said no!

I have to talk to Allan's parents.

Why are you sounding off, girl? Get out.

My god, you're pathetic.

You got a bit of support, after all.

Hi, Lea.

I don't know what you're doing here,
or why you're back.

But don't start interfering
with Allan's needs.

- She needs a friend.
- She needs a Hjørdis.

We'll give it a shot.

BAVNEGÅRD SCHOOL



- Have a good day.
- See you. Bye, Mum.

You've got to be kidding me.

- You should know where it's from.
- It's from the fridge.

- No, Bjarne!
- Yes, but which cow?

- That's irrelevant.
- No, it's not irrelevant.

Conventional farming
is sheer animal cruelty...

Home Economics? It says
Home Economics on my timetable.

- Yes.
- That's got to be a mistake.

I'm not going anywhere near a kitchen,
least of all while I'm working.

But cooking is great.

No, it's not. Sleeping is great
and being alone is great.

Cooking is not great, particularly
not with a lot of children. Hi.

- It's not organic.
- Rita, this is Niels and Kalinka.

- They're newcomers as well.
- Or survivors, if you will.

In Copenhagen, going outside is equivalent
to smoking half a pack of cigarettes.

- That sounds cheap.
- Yeah, but your lungs pay the price.

- Bjarne, Home Economics?
- Yes...

Bitten, our Home Economics teacher,
has quit,

so until we find a new teacher,
you'll take turns.

This is your week. You've got 4.50 kroner
per student. You can do what you want.

If you can't think of anything,
we've made this.

It's recipes.

They've been sorted
according to their health factor.

Health what?

Like X Factor,
just with health instead of X.

It's a really good way
of making the children visualize

what's healthy and what's not.
Imagine an avocado singing like a dream.

And then on the angry smiley pages,

you've got a Nutella sandwich which is
just howling away. Totally out of tune.

- Happy.
- Angry.

Thanks, but it's a "no" from me.
But thank you so much for coming.

YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT

Shouldn't you be going?

Yes.

Maybe I should lie down with him
for a bit.

No. He'll be fine.

He's used to me being there.
What if you run out of milk?

Do you even know where the milk is?
Maybe I should call in sick.

Hjørdis, listen. I'm his dad. Don't worry.

You wrote a list and copied it
and hung it all over the place.

There's one there...
And one there as well...

And would you believe it?
There's another one... And what's that?

- A list.
- Right?

There's one in the bathroom as well
and one in...

We'll be fine, sweetie. Kiss, kiss.
That's it. Off you go.

- And... she's moving.
- Yes...

Have fun, we miss you already.

- Take care. Bye.
- Bye.

That's it... in peace.

Bjarne, I just wanted to ask.
How well do you know Allan's mum?

Lea?

Do you know how she... you know... is?

I think she's fine. Why wouldn't she be?
Is something wrong?

No, no. I'm just curious.

I'm sure she's happy.
If not, we'll have to make her so.

We need happy parents to keep the school
from being shut down.

When will it be decided?

There's a consultant from the municipality
coming tomorrow to check if it's true

that a school with our challenges
can perform so well.

They simply can't understand
that teamwork creates miracles.

- That goes for the kitchen job as well.
- I was hoping you'd forgotten about that.

There's still time to borrow
the health factor folder.

There's still time to give the class
to someone else.

Alright... I'll introduce
the kids to Rita's Kitchen, then.

- Good morning, kids.
- Good morning.

Today, we're doing something a bit
different. We'll begin with not cooking.

Instead of baking,
we'll go to the bakery.

- But we're supposed to cook ourselves.
- You're welcome to do that...

- Knud. My mum and dad say that...
- Your mum and dad aren't here now, Knud.

Yes, they are. They're teachers.
Niels and Kalinka.

Okay, Knud. Why don't we agree
that you cook at home,

- and we do something else in my classes?
- You can't go against the teaching plan.

It's written specifically
in the school's Statement of Aims

that nutrition should have extra focus.

Okay. Then we'll put extra focus on that
some other day. Right?

I'll tell my mum, then.

Does the school's Statement of Aims
also say that you should tell on people?

Okay. How many of you
can be bothered to cook?

When I was a child, we'd rather
just eat a bloody cinnamon bun.

Well, that was before you knew
what was in them.

Okay, Knud, just take it...
We'll look at it.

Let's go back to the kitchen.

Statement of Aims, my ass!

You are what you eat, Johnny.

But it's not difficult.
Just eat a lot from the bottom,

a bit less from the middle
and least from the top.

- I prefer to eat from the top.
- Yes.

But that's not how
the food pyramid works, Johnny.

Mine does.

Well, then have a look
at the other poster.

Look at that sausage.
It looks pretty tired, eh?

You don't want to be a limp sausage,
do you, Johnny?

Do you think being a cinnamon bun is any
better? It's really not very nutritious.

But then, I don't use
so much energy on smiling.

Rita...

- Rita!
- What?

It's not the first time
I've seen you eating cake for lunch.

Don't your parents ever make you
a packed lunch?

- No.
- Why not?

- Because they can't be bothered.
- But they have to.

I think you should
talk to them about it, then.

It's their responsibility
that you get proper food.

- I prefer a cinnamon bun.
- That's not proper food.

If you become what you eat, what did you
eat to become such a know-it-all?

Hey! What's going on?

Why don't you say anything, moron?

Stop that. If you call someone a moron,
then you're an idiot.

Who are you?

I'm Hjørdis. Your new history teacher.

- Are you okay?
- I don't want to go on that trip.

- What trip?
- We were supposed to go abseiling.

- And it's a total waste of time.
- It's just one day.

The school says that if Allan
is too scared to go,

we all have to do something else.

It's so sick that you get to decide
everything!

No, stop that. Even if you're angry,
you can still be nice to people.

Don't you have anything better to say?

No. But what I'm saying
is actually important as well.

And if Bjarne has made that decision,
that's the way it's going to be.

So go and sit down and open your books.

- It's totally unfair.
- Yes.

- What are you doing?
- I'm just googling.

- What are you googling?
- Nothing.

Is that possible?

Can I see?

"Danish abseiling". "Safety".
"Accidents".

No wonder you get scared
if you're looking up things like that.

- I'm looking at it to stop being scared.
- But it's not working?

- I had a totem animal once.
- A totem animal?

Yes. An elf I got from my dad.

So technically speaking,
it wasn't an animal.

But we called him...
His name was Elf. Elf the elf.

I always had Elf with me,
and every time I got upset,

I would take him out and think...

I'm in the ninth grade. You want me to
walk around with a teddy in my pocket

and then you think everything
will be alright?

I just wanted to...

Thanks, but no thanks.

Home Economics is like this: Here, we have
four bags of spaghetti and some ketchup.

You take a pan, put some water in,
pour, pour, pour...

On to the stove, switch it on,
boil, boil, boil...

Chuck the pasta in,
boil, boil, boil.

You wait and wait and wait...

Then you take it and taste it.
"Is it soft?" It's done.

Yup, that's it. Any questions?

- Are we only having spaghetti?
- No, there's vegetables as well.

I can't have spaghetti.

You can't have it?

- It's full of chemistry stuff.
- Okay.

You're telling me you can't tolerate
the study of liquids and metals?

I cannot have processed food,
because it contains chemistry.

Chemistry is not an ingredient, Knud.
Chemistry is a science.

There are chemicals in everything.
Carrots, for example, contain chemicals.

- Ramson soup.
- What?

- You can find that in the wild.
- Well, I'm not eating weeds.

I'm not eating that stuff
if you're not eating anything else.

Okay... Knud.

Tomorrow. You and me, here.

I'll make spaghetti,
and you'll make that... nature food.

Then we'll see who is
the most fussy.

Deal?

Rita? Rita, we have to do something.

I am doing something.
Can we do the other thing later?

No. Allan needs help.

So, lots of action on
your first day of school?

Yes. It's not good. Allan is feeling bad,
and the others are down on him.

He's highly sensitive.

Okay. But what are we
going to do about it?

That depends if you're asking me
or his parents.

Isn't this where you go in and...

do something which will
make Allan happy again, or...

Or maybe say some wise words
to Allan's parents

so that they can see that
their way is totally wrong?

In your... in your own, special Rita way.

I can't help him, Hjørdis.
His parents don't want me to.

You don't normally care about that.
Why do you care?

Okay, Hjørdis. Listen...

- Me and Allan's mum, Lea, we...
- You what?

- We went here as kids.
- At this school?

And we were good friends, and we...

- It's a bit complicated.
- Yeah. Okay, what happened?

Should I not interfere? Or should I?
Listen, I'll interfere if you want me to.

- Hjørdis?
- Yes. No. Or...?

God, Reinulf...

Reinulf, Reinulf...

- Where is he?
- What?

Where's Reinulf?
Are you up here? Reinulf?

- What's happening? Sweetie?
- Oh, no.

- Have you left him somewhere or what?
- No. I can't...

Where did you last see him?
Reinulf. Reini...

Sweetie... Sweetie pie?
He's sleeping.

He must have been very difficult.
Has he cried? He's cried, hasn't he?

- No...
- It's so awful when he's crying.

- But Hjørdis...
- I'd better stay home tomorrow.

Hjørdis, he's been perfectly fine.

- "Perfectly fine"?
- He's played, had a bath, had some food

and romped about in the playpen.
There haven't been any problems.

- Haven't you missed me at all?
- Yes.

But then we made this delicious
vegetable lasagne instead of being upset.

Rita says she won't help Allan, even
though she can see that Allan needs help.

- Who will help him, then?
- Can't you do it?

- Rita is his class teacher.
- But she isn't doing anything.

No... I have to make them talk.

Rita and Allan.

No. Rita and Lea, Allan's mum.

Then afterwards, Rita can talk to Allan.
Yes.

Okay, that...
That sounds a bit confusing.

No. What's confusing?
Lea is the mother of...

Was that him? Did he say "mom"?

He said "mom". Oh, my god...

Reinulf, mom is coming!

Well, "thanks for dinner, Uffe."

BUTCHER

If you get lost in the forest, do you
think the food pyramid will help you?

No. The only thing it can show you
is how unhealthy you are.

You should know that already
just by looking at yourselves.

You might become what you eat,
but nature doesn't care what you are.

It will eat you
if you don't get to know it.

We're going to collect mushrooms, insects,
berries, the DNA of the forest...

We'll bring it back home under controlled
conditions, and then we'll dissect it.

That's what separates man from nature.

We can take control of it,
acquire knowledge

and then use this knowledge
to conquer it.

The girls will collect nuts,
leaves and berries,

and the boys will deal with
anything living.

Why?

Why what?

Why can't we collect any of the fun stuff?

You don't want to get creepy-crawlies
on your fingers, now, do you?

Listen! A spotted woodpecker. Come on.

This is a magnificent specimen...

God, he's such a jerk.

It's fine with me. I don't want
to touch any insects. They're gross.

Well, then he's right. Girls are all about
being cute and afraid of touching dirt.

- That means the boys are the toughest.
- That's not what he said.

No, but that's what he meant.

How cool that you both agree.
"Planet of the losers" or what?

You're so ridiculous.

Your mum isn't here now
to look after you, is she?

- Susanne.
- Fine, Sleeping Beauty.

We'll collect leaves and decorations,
then.

Come on.

I could do with some sun now.

- A kind of natural tanning salon.
- Exactly.

That's a fine specimen. That one...

- It's just a frog.
- No! Get it off me!

Haven't you brought any food?

- Did you forget to buy a cinnamon bun?
- So what?

You can have some creepy-crawlies
if you want.

I wouldn't be surprised
if she eats stuff like that.

- What if I do?
- Do what?

- Eat little things for lunch.
- Then you're pretty disgusting.

- We already know she is.
- Then she's extra disgusting.

Can't you just stop it?

Stop what? We want to hear what Malene
thinks I'm disgusting enough to eat.

I think you're so disgusting
that you'll eat beetles, worms,

flies and all sorts of other insects.

That's probably why she hasn't brought
any lunch.

Things like this one?

Yes.

You're so disgusting, Rita!

What the hell were you thinking?
Why do you have to be so weird?

You could have had some of my food
if you wanted.

Shut up and leave me alone.

Yeah. Eating a frog alive
is definitely going to help...

They should leave you alone as well.

What now? You can't go back right now.

Why not?

Because it's mega embarrassing that you
just spewed up after eating a frog alive.

You become what you eat?

You're so weird.

- Hey.
- Hi.

What are we doing?

- I've made cake.
- Okay.

- Hjørdis...
- You think it's weird?

This isn't weird,
this is perfectly normal.

- Right now, it's a bit weird.
- Then have some cake.

Don't get angry now, okay?

Okay, Hjørdis... What is this?

- Hi.
- Hi...

What is this?

I've made cake. Or...
Uffe has made cake.

- Did you arrange this?
- No, I don't... Hjørdis?

You're probably thinking:
"It's a bit weird that Hjørdis said

we were just meeting her, and then
there's someone else in the room."

But if we look past that for a second...

I don't need this.

Listen, Allan is having a hard time.
I feel sorry for him.

If we're going to solve these problems,

we have to make sure we've got
a great adult teamwork in place.

"Great adult teamwork".
Isn't that exactly what we haven't got?

When a team of completely new teachers
in my son's class

start changing all the arrangements
we've made with the school.

I don't know exactly what it was that
happened between the two of you...

And... but I would really
like to find out.

But I don't know.

But it shouldn't affect Allan.
If you feel like talking about it...

Maybe that half-ogre, half-misunderstood,
well-meaning counsellor thing

works with others... But just drop it.

And you just stick to the arrangements
we've made. Thank you.

Yes...

- That wasn't a very nice thing to say.
- Hjørdis, you stay completely out of this!

Thanks.

He's sleeping again.

- Just like that?
- Just like that.

Pop! I think I have a good grip of this.

Nobody needs me.

What? That's not true.

Everyone is much better off
when I'm not there.

They can sleep without crying,

and Rita doesn't even need my help
in order to help Allan.

So no one is helping. If she doesn't want
to, he won't get any help, and then...

Why is everyone getting so angry with me?

Hjørdis, a boy needs your help,
so you've got to help him.

- Yes, but it's Rita's...
- Screw Rita!

Not for real, but, you know...

If Allan needs your help,
you have to help him.

Because that's how my Hjørdis is.
She doesn't give a damn what others think.

- I don't give a damn?
- Not at all.

Unless you agree with them, of course.

- Right... So I should just screw it?
- Yes. Screw it.

Right? Just screw it!

Oh, Uffe... I knew it, I could feel it.

I'm coming, sweetheart.

I just need to screw it. Screw it!

- Hjørdis, for God's sake!
- Sorry.

Screw it.

Hi, Allan. I need you to come with me.
Come.

Allan, just relax now. Relax.
Everything is okay. You can do this.

- I trust you. Come on!
- I can't.

- You can do it.
- No, I can't.

Listen to Hjørdis.
I trust you. I believe in you.

- No.
- Yes! I believe in you.

Everyone has to start somewhere,
and you'll start right here.

Okay...

You must be Jan Friis. Bjarne Ulrichsen.
Welcome to Bavnegård School.

So what's your unofficial consultant
assessment?

How are the other schools doing?

You know I can't tell you that.
I have to be neutral.

Yes, yes... But no one can be
completely neutral.

There are seven schools
in the municipality,

four of them in towns
that are so depopulated,

it's a question whether they qualify
as towns anymore.

What will it take
for you not to close our school?

I'm here to inspect the school's
physical environment

and give my evaluation of how well
you're using your resources.

But the physical environment alone
is not what makes us unique.

We value teamwork, inclusion
and high professional standards.

- It's all on our website, of course.
- And on everyone else's.

This is the heart of the school...
Or stomach, if you will.

You're holding on to a canteen system
despite the costs?

Yes, we've introduced a voluntary
parent payment to keep the quality high.

It's not costing the municipality a penny.
You can note that down.

- It looks new.
- Yes, but it's not.

We've introduced two annual work days
for the parents.

They make sure the school
is in good nick.

- But you've got a maintenance budget.
- Yes, that's correct.

But we prefer to use the money
on children with special needs.

We're not the kind of school
to just sit back

and make do with the cards
we've been dealt.

You can note that down as well.

- You are impressed, aren't you?
- I've got to admit, it looks good.

But it gets better. Just come and see.

We've converted the caretaker's
old office into a workroom.

You won't believe what these kids can do.
It's quite touching, actually.

Knud... I feel sharp today.

I was born sharp.

"Let the hunger games begin."

All ingredients were found in the wild?

I foraged it all myself. And the pasta?

Straight from the supermarket.

- Ready?
- Ready.

Go.

This is actually tasty.
Is this what pasta tastes like?

Do you like the soup?

Yes, it'll do... No, it's delicious.

Don't say anything to my parents.

Well... What are you going to write?

I can't say anymore right now. Sorry.
I think I've seen what I needed to see.

Okay. Thank you.

Hey, you forgot your notes.

You haven't written anything.
I showed you the whole school.

Yes, but it doesn't matter at all
what I write in my report.

The council make their decision
based on reasons I don't even know.

- At least tell them what you've seen.
- Oh, I will.

After each school visit,
I tell them about principals

who proudly present the results
they've achieved with almost no funding.

But what's the use when one of the schools
has to be shut down, no matter what?

Not ours.

Not ours. It can't be ours.
Our school is...

Fantastic, yes. Just like all the others.

We just don't have enough
children for all of them.

Did you poison our son?

We cooked. Knud...

Knud had a bit of...
He's had... We made...

Spag... Spaghetti.

- Who brought this?
- Knud. It's ram...

It's ramson. Bloody hell.

This isn't ramson.
It's lily of the valley.

Okay. And let me guess.
Lily of the valley... Lily...

- Is very poisonous.
- Incredibly poisonous.

And here was I thinking that
nature wasn't dangerous.

It's not nature's fault that Knud...

Listen, I don't give a damn
whose fault it is.

Nature is more dangerous than spaghetti.
Get out of my kitchen. Out!

Goodbye.

- Is everything on track?
- Totally.

Okay. So when everything is on track,
you tend to sit and throw coins around?

I don't know what you're talking about.
The consultant was very impressed.

- That's good.
- We just need to get past the hearing.

- The hearing?
- Yes, there'll be a public hearing.

We'll give it all we've got, win, and then
the school will survive. Bang, that's it!

- And if not, we'll throw a coin.
- And if it lands lopsided?

We'll throw it again.

No one but us decides how things should be
run in our lives.

Okay. See you tomorrow, Bjarne.

Hi, Knud. What are you doing here so late?

- I just wanted to say sorry.
- For what?

- Poisoning you.
- No worries.

I couldn't tell the difference.

You'll learn.

- My dad says I can't cook anymore.
- Come home to me and cook, then.

What if you get sick again?

That's where this one will come in handy.

There you go.

KNOW YOUR EDIBLE WILD PLANTS
- AND AVOID THE POISONOUS ONES

- Can I have it?
- You can borrow it.

We'll see if the school library
forgets about it.

- Thanks.
- You're welcome.

Do you think we're silly?

No. You've got parents
who care about the way they live.

They just want you to feel good.

When I was a child,
most people didn't care.

- Do you always do this sort of thing?
- What sort of thing?

- Helping.
- You're sweet.

- I want to do it as well.
- Okay.

Who do you want to help?

I don't know.
Do you need help with anything?

- You've got to help me.
- What's happened?

My sister fell down.

Is it serious?

Where is she?

Eh?

Lea?

Thanks, Knud.

What the hell is going on?

I thought you'd slam the door on me
if you knew it was me standing there.

Yes, of course.

This is no good, Lea.

Using kids as a decoy,
I don't think that's... That's a bit low.

- I'm sorry, Lea.
- Jesus!

Do you think you'll be let off so easily?

What do you want me to do?

I don't know. I really don't know.

Yes, eat that beetle there.

If it's so goddamn important to you,
then eat that beetle.

No, I didn't think so.

Wait.

You're just as crazy
as you've always been.

Maybe a bit more.

See you.

I know you don't want it,
but I think you should try it anyway.

It's a packed lunch. My dad made it.

Your dad made a packed lunch for me?

Yeah. Give it a go, and...
He'd like to keep doing it, so...

Thanks.

No more frogs.

Okay.

Subtitles: Henriette Persson