ReBoot (1994–2002): Season 1, Episode 3 - The Quick & the Fed - full transcript

After Bob ruins Megabyte's plans, by stealing his magnet. He went to Dot's Diner to be congratulated on his success in keeping Mainframe safe from viral threat. Bob lets Enzo play with his key tool: Glitch. But after Enzo tried out the Jack Hammer mode, it cause the magnet case to open and the magnet came flying out and sucked the energy out of Dot. She's now on the verge of deletion. And according to Phong, the cure is to provide her with "Slow Food". So Bob heads over to the only place in Mainframe that serves Slow Food is in Sector 31, which has this other diner called Al's. Unlike Dot's Diner, Al's is full of tough looking Sprites & Binomes, Viral Binomes, and Numbers. Bob tells the waiter up front to give him an order on Slow Food fast. Only to discover that receiving Slow Food will take time. But he doesn't have all seconds as Dot is close to being erased. While Megabyte sends his forces to get his magnet back from Bob. Will Bob get his order of Slow Food and save the day?

(ReBoot - 1x03:
Quick and the Fed: EN-SDH)

BOB, V.O.: I come
from the net,

through systems,
peoples, and cities,

to this place.

Mainframe.

My format, Guardian.

To mend and defend.

To defend
my new-found friends,

their hopes and dreams.

To defend them from...

their enemies.



( ♪ instrumental )

( thunder )

( electric surging )

BOB: They say the user
lives outside the net,

and inputs games
for pleasure.

No one knows
for sure...

but I intend
to find out.

ReBoot!



-BINOME: Hey, watch it!

( null squeaking )

( beep )

( surging and humming )

( whirring )



( squeaking )

( beep )

( pulsing )

( electrical surging )

( pulsing )

-It's opening,
Nibbles...

My path...

to the Supercomputer.

More worlds...

more servants...

-( Nibbles squealing )
-more power...

-You wish!

-WHAT?!

-Get him!

-It's Bob!

-Stop him!

( laughing )

-He'll erase

if he gets within ten
bits of that magnet...

( laughs )

-ALL: Aah!

( clang )

( slams and
panel beeps )

( whirrs )

( surging )

-Glitch, cutters.

( saw blade buzzing )

( whirring stops
abruptly )

( explosions )

( humming slows
and stops )

-Look out!

-Backspace, backspace!

( clang )

( alarms ring )

( Megabyte grunts )

-Glitch, auto-stow.

Gah!

( roars )

( zip-board hums )

Later!

( hisses loudly )



-BINOME ON SCREEN: OK, Boss!
Consider it done!

-Bob!

( thud )

ENZO: Major coolness
out there, Bob!

I heard you royally
kicked Megabyte's bitmap!

Think there'll
be a Game soon?

Think I could go in the
Game with you, huh?

I could be your copilot,
or your deputy, or--!

DOT: Uhh... Enzo...?

-ENZO: Yeah, Dot?

-DOT: It's not
good for business

when you sit on
the customers.

-ENZO: Oh, sorry.

Here, Bob.

-Ah, table for
two, sir?

-BOB: Yeah,
Ceecil, please.

That's CECIL.
(SESS-Sil)

( beeping )

CECIL: Hmm...

( beeping )

Wait at the bar,
wait at the bar!

-Care to join me, Bob?

-BOB: Uhh, sure,
thanks, Dot!

( squeak )

( crash )

Somebody moved
my stool!

-DOT: Cecil, a
drink for Bob.

-CECIL: Of
course, ma'am.

TALL COOL ONE
ON TRACK ONE!

( whirring )

( bells ringing )

( zooms )

( doors slamming )

-DOT: Dot's Diner,

fastest food
in Mainframe.

-This is true.

-ENZO: Aw, cool!
What's this?

-A magnet.

( dishes clattering )

-ALL: MAGNET!!

-It's okay.

It's shielded.

-DOT: Oh.
( nervous laughter )

-ALL: Phew!

-You better get that to
Old Man Pearson's Data Dump,

down in Sector 1-0-0-1.

-I will, thanks.

Go ahead, Enzo.

Give Glitch a try.

-ENZO: Really?!

Alphanumeric!

Glitch...

uhh... hammer!

( whirrs )

Flashlight!

Uhh...

Jackhammer!

-( jackhammer drilling )
-Who-a-a-a-a!

-Whoa-a-a-a...!

-GLITCH! STOP!

( whirring )

( creaking )

( clatters, whirrs )

-Aah!

-Sis!

( whirring )

-Glitch! Auto-stow!

( groans )

-What have I done?!

Poor Dot!

Erased by her
own brother

in the prime of
her input-output!

She's too young
to end-file,

too young to
quit-without-saving!

It's all my fault,
if only I'd--!

-BOB: We'll get her help,
Enzo, don't panic.

DOESN'T ANYONE HERE

KNOW HOW TO REVERSE A
MAGNETIC ERASURE?!

-CECIL: No, but Phong
would, sir...

( zooming, doors slam )
-CECIL: No, but Phong
would, sir...

Sir?



-Uh, Phong?

Dot needs help NOW,

as in not later?

( slamming game puck )

( beeping )

-Shh!

Concentration
is important!

( clangs, Phong
groans )

Ahh!

You have good
backspin, my son!

( creaking )

-( dazed )
You're tellin' me!

( whirring )

-Now that you have whomped
me at my favourite game,

you have proven
yourself worthy

of my vast knowledge,

and endless wisdom.

What was the question?

-I told you, it's Dot!

She's been partially
erased by a magnet,

and they said you would know
how to return her to normal!

-Hmm... magnetic
erasure, huh?

The source code accelerates an
unstable file fragmentation,

leading to a
complete delete.

-Whoa, you lost
me, Phong.

Can you repeat that?

In plain DOS?

-Probably not,

But I can tell you that
Dot needs to access

some really, really,
REALLY slow food.

It will decelerate her
accelerated condition,

and return her
to normal.

( scratch scratch
scratch )

-PHONG: Well?! What
are you waiting for?!

Any shock or
sudden movement

could completely
destabilize her!

HURRY! YOU DON'T HAVE
ALL SECOND, YOU KNOW!

-BOB: And he knew a place that
serves this kind of slow food,

Al's Wait and Eat.

Level 31.

-Level 31?!

No way!

DOT, DISTORTED: L-L-Level
Thirty-Thirty-One?

Y-y-you down can't
go there...

It's to-o-o-o
da-a-a-angerous...

-BOB: Shh, not to worry,
I've got this all figured out.

-Bob, b-b-b-but...
( groans )

It-it-it-it's my
pr--oblem to-o-o-o-o.

Vid-vid-vid-vid--

Use a window to--

Call-all

ca-ca-call-call-call--

-BOB: Not another word.

You do the relaxing,

I'll do the
saving, okay?

Man, she's really
out of it.

-Ooh! Ooh! Can
I go with you?

Level 31?! Can I,
can I, huh?!

-I'm counting
on you here,

and so is your sister.

Hang in there, Dot.

Bob's on the job.



Whoa. Tough room.

( snoring )

HELLO?

-( yawns ) May I
take your order?

-This is an emergency!

I need slow food
to go, fast!

-( sarcastically )
Ha, ha, ha.

That's a good one.

Hear that, Al?

-AL: WHAT?

-Slow food
doesn't go fast.

That's why it's slow.

If ya wanna order
some food,

take a number.

( window springs )

( beeps )

-4096.

Must be the
lunch crowd.

-Now serving number...

Three.



( electric zapping )

-I have a
function for you,

Hack and Slash.

-HACK: I am proud to
announce that I am Hack,

-SLASH: And I am Slash.
-HACK: HE is Slash.

-SLASH: I am Slash.

-HACK: I am Hack.
-SLASH: Don't you know us,
Mister Megabyte?

-SLASH: I am hurt.
-HACK: Hack and Slash,
get it right.

-SLASH: Yes, and blue.

-Let's not waste memory
on unimportant details.

I need that magnet.

I want you to search
and retrieve Bob.

-HACK: Bob?
-SLASH: Ooh, magnet.

-HACK: Ooh! Oh yeah!
-SLASH: Hmm!
Yeah, I don't like that.

-HACK: Ah, no problem!
-SLASH: Ah, I have no problem.

-HACK: Hey, no problem!

-HACK: Piece of cake!
-SLASH: It's a piece... piece of cake.

-SLASH: Yeah.

( loud belch )

-BOB: What's the
deal with Seven?

Why's everyone
afraid of him?

Because Seven, Eight, Nine!
( seven ate nine )

( rim-shot )

-Can't you process
my FOOD ANY FASTER?!

-Look, pal,

I gotta feed
this whole room,

I got a partner
on my back

for this big
take-out order.

And Al back there only
runs at three decahertz!

-AL: WHAT?

-Ya gotta wait online

like everyone
else, okay?

- HELP ME, PLEASE!

I NEED YOUR FOOD ON A
MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH!

-Zip off, punk!

I've been waitin' for
this since I was four!

( all yelp )

-Ohh, what are
you doing here?!

We already
paid Megabyte!

Don't smash up
the place again!

( vid-window springs )
Don't smash up
the place again!

-MEGABYTE: Everyone,

I'm looking for
a dear friend.

Seen him lately?

-BOB: Care to trade?

-WAITER: Uhh, what?

-BOB: You give me food,

I'll get rid of
your friends.

-WAITER: What?!

Uhh, sure, you've
got a deal!

-Here I am, Megabyte!

( beeps )

-Well, seize
him, you fools!

-Ya have to
catch me, first!

-HACK: Hey!
-SLASH: Stop!

-HACK: I was gonna say that!
-SLASH: I know.

( thud )

( long steady tone )

-SYSTEM VOICE:
Warning, incoming Game.

Warning, incoming Game.

( thunder )

( beep )

( thud )

-You aren't going
to catch me

before the Game
wall closes.

-Oh yeah?!

-Heh heh heh!

-Why not?!

-Yeah, why not?

-Because you stopped.

-LOGIC ERROR!
-LOGIC ERROR!

-SLASH: Ohh, I think
we're gonna do it!

-HACK: We are
going to make it!

-HACK: We are gonna make it!
-SLASH: Oh, we are
going to make it!

-We are going to make it!
-We are going to make it!

-MEGABYTE: They're not
going to make it.

-( faint explosions
on screen )

( disgusted groan )

Cleanup crew,
level one...

( surging )

( ♪ pleasant
medieval music )

-ReBoot!

I know this game...

Looks like
Castles and...

-( yelps ) Knights!
-( clatters )

-DOT'S VOICE IN
DISTANCE: Help!

Please help me!

-Dot!

Hang on, I'm coming!

She needs this food.

If the white knight grabs
Dot in her condition,

she could REALLY
be in distress!

( dragon screeches )

BOB: Hey!

Access your own dragon!

( bonk )

( screech )

BOB: Hyah!

BOB: Major problems
at 6 o'clock...?

-?: WHAT?

-Who's in
there, anyway?

-It's just me...

And Al's workin' on the
fire-breathing part.

-AL: WHAT?

-Great.

Get with the program!

If we don't stop
that white knight,

We're ALL history!

-Okay, here goes!

-AAAHH!

( red dragon
screeches )

( loud belch )

Nice belching!

-I think Al's getting the
hang of the furnace!

-AL: WHAT?

( dragon screech )

( clang )

-BOB: How about keeping
the white knight busy,

while I access
the damsel?

-You got it, Bob!

-Glitch, B-S-&-P.

( energy pulsing )

-DOT'S VOICE IN
DISTANCE: Heeeeelp!

-Don't bother
to get up,

I'm just passin'
through.

( snarls )

( snarls )

( gears creaking )

( slam )

Uh oh.

( metal clashing )

( clang )

BOB: You really
should...

lie down!

You look terrible!

( cracking )

( floor rumbling )

( clang )

( snarls )

( metal clangs )

Glitch, Vid Window!

Large icons!

( vid window springs,
bones clattering )

-Heeelp! Heeeelp!

-BOB: I'm comin', Dot!

( footsteps )

-?: Bob!

-ENZO?!

-DOT'S VOICE THROUGH HORN:
Am I glad to see you!

( normal ) You've gotta help me
delete these stupid clothes!

It's mega-embarrassing!

I wanted to ReBoot into
a knight like you!

Not a damsel
in this dress!

-That colour is you.

Hey, why haven't you
bowled me over yet?

( cartoonish twinkling )

( gasps ) Where's Dot?

I'm supposed to be
saving her, remember?

( crash )

-She's right
there, Bob.

-BOB: Dot! You're...

You're better!

-Not for long!

I can't fight
him forever...

-( grunts,
metal clangs )

by myself!

( wood splintering )

-Oh, right. I'm coming!

( clang )

I don't think so.

( clink )

( clangs, surges )

The icon!

Hit his icon!

( grunts )

( surges )

( explosion )

-No way!

-SYSTEM VOICE:
Game Over.

( squeak )

-DOT: Hey,
alright Enzo!

Nice shot!

-BOB: Good job!

-Ya mean it?

-BOB: Yeah!

Alright, I give up,

How did you get
back to normal?

I was trying to
tell you before!

Al and I are partners
in his business!

I just Vid Windowed
for a delivery!

-You and Al?

( sighs ) So much for me
being Mister Save-the-Day.

Care for some, uh...

slightly used food?

-No...

But thanks for
the thought.

-Bob!

( gasps )

-It was quite difficult
and time-consuming

to process that
magnet, Bob.

I think I'd like
you to return it.

And the sooner...

the better.

-Hey, no need to be
so dramatic, "M.B."

Glitch, tongs.

I was just gonna
toss it, anyway.

Here, catch!

-AUGH!

( surging ) Hack!

Slash!

( roars )

-HACK: Coming...
-SLASH: Boss!

-HACK: You know,
it's times like this,

-HACK: I feel extremely
close to you.

-SLASH: You know, I was gonna
say the same thing to you.

-HACK: And there's something
I should tell you before we...

-SLASH: You
are like my brother.

-HACK: Before
we hit rock-bottom.

-SLASH: What?
-HACK: Uhh...

-HACK: Ohh...
it's too late.

( loud crash )

-BOB: They're not
even close to Al's.

-DOT: Nope.

-ENZO: Not even.

-BOB: Speaking
of which, Dot,

Is there anything in
Mainframe you DON'T own?

-DOT: Maybe.

Who wants to know?