Randall & Hopkirk (Deceased) (2000–2001): Season 1, Episode 2 - Mental Apparition Disorder - full transcript

Marty is taught the tricks of the after-life, such as how to levitate objects, by an elderly ghost called Wyvern. Jeannie, meanwhile, who has taken an active role in the agency, is concerned for Jeff when he is overheard talking to Marty. She has him seek psychiatric aid from Dr. Lawyer, but he is a crook who hypnotises his clients into committing crimes for him. When he realises that Jeff is in contact with Marty he erases Marty from Jeff's memory, so Marty impersonates the doctor's voice and advises Jeff on how to thwart the next crime.

Here's to us.

God you make make me horny, Lucy.

If only we didn't have to be so discrete.

But darling, you know if Anne found
anything out, I mean if she even suspected.

It's better this way.

Our little secret.

No one else in the whole world knows we're here.

So come on,

let's go and hunt some big game.

Hello.

Come on darling, my elephant gun's loaded and it's ready to go off.



Lucy.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello. -I'm looking for Mr. Wyvern.

I'm Wyvern and you must be Mr Hopkirk.

Yes. -Well met good traveller. Be at peace.

Sit down with me and tell thy tale.

Come, join me for a noble feast.
Good cheer to thee I can avail.

My welcome hearthside is thy lease.
Enter my home and rest away.

This way please.

No after you.

No, please.
-Please, you go in. Please go in!!

Mr. Randall, this is umm,
Mr Three Piece from the casino.



The casino. Hello there, how do you do.
Jeff Randall. Please take a seat.

So, how long have you worked at the casino Mr Three--

Mr.-- Sorry, Mr. Three Piece. I'm gonna have difficulty calling you that you know.

It's my nickname, on account of my size, like a three piece suite.

They're very big, aren't they? So what's your real name?

Percy -Oh, that is nice name. Percy.

No, it's not. Why do you think
I changed it to Three Piece?

I don't care what mine is called, as long as it's not a mutant.

Yeah well, take it from me.
Don't call it Percy.

Unless you want him to be persecuted.

Anyway, as I was saying, how long have you worked at the casino?

Nearly ten years. Two as head of security.

Right, and how long has Miss...?

Karen's been there exactly 611 days,

but I only started to notice that money was going missing about a month ago.

Right, you're head of security, so why don't you confront her yourself?

Why do you need to employ me?

No, I couldn't do that.

I mean.

It's a bit delicate
Mr. Randall. Sounds silly.

I worship the ground she walks on.

Chairs she sits in. Tissue she blows her nose into.

The way her eyes pucker up when she smiles.

Alright, I get the picture, thanks.

But she don't even know I exist. Except as just a big scary bloke.

If I was to confront her about any of this.

What would my chances be then?

Right. No I understand. I think what we need to do is to get someone in the casino working undercover as it were,

to find out exactly what's going on, right? So if I can just take some more details?

Blast.

Sorry Mr Randall,
but I think my water is broken. -Right.

What?

Felia. Jeff.

Thank God Jeannie Felia's Waters are broken

Breathe deeply and slowly,

but don't push.

This is Three Piece
will you look after him.

OK, OK, she's having a baby!

So I see.

This is three Piece, Jeannie.
Will you look after him?

OK, just take some addresses, everything.
Don't forget to lock up.

OK, now.

You'll get the hang of it, Marty. The trick is believing.

None of this after all is real.

No?

I merely created all this so that you would feel at home.

But we could just as easily be sitting here.

Or here.

But I thought here would be the most comfortable.

And you see me like this.

But this is not what I really look like.

And what do you really look like?

You don't want to know Marty.
Believe me. you don't want to know.

But the thing of it is, you shouldn't be here at all.

You should have gone up stairs.

You were allowed a limited return to the mortal realm, and you overstayed your welcome.

I know.
Daylight come and I couldn't go home.

Exactly, which is why
you have been sent to me.

It is my lot to tend to lost sheep.

Let me see now. You were a private detective in life, were you not?

Yes, Randall and Hopkirk Security Services.

And after death, you chose to make yourself manifest to your partner, Mr. Randall?

Yes, well I thought if anyone could help me solve my own murder it would be him.

Yeah, a wise choice so now he alone can see you, though there may be others with the gift of seeing.

Those with more innocent eyes.

Animals, children.

Morons.

But what powers do I actually have?

It varies from spirit to spirit. One's
powers as a spectre are linked to the
powers you possessed as a mortal,

for example, a great poet in life may have the power to speak unto others in death.

Well, if that's the case, then I should have quite a few powers.

Oh?
-Yes, I was erm--

a pretty good singer.

I could have turned pro if I wanted to.
I was a great dancer, particularly tap.

Terrific lover. Snappy dresser,

an absolutely first rate cook--

And a man who was full of hot air may be able to create wind.

Everything will be OK.
-Are you the father?

No, the father's abroad.

I'm afraid there are complications.
We're gonna get you into surgery.

Hello it's me. -Not now. -Sorry.

Heartbeat's dropping. We're losing her.

We wanted to have kids Jeff, Jeannie and I

It would've be nice to have seen 'em grow up, wouldn't it?

Have left something behind, when you're gone.

Marty
-Felia.

Come back.

Marty
-Go back, it isn't time yet, come on.

Oh

I thought we'd lost her and the baby, but she's a fighter.

She'll be fine.

Thanks.

You look tired. Are you alright?

No, I'm not Jeannie.
I think I'm falling apart.

Do you want to talk about it?

Hey,what about that then eh? Pretty nifty?

Not now please. -I'm sorry. -No Jeannie,
it's just I do desperately need to talk to you,

but some of the things I need to say to
you, if I told you, you'd think I was--

Will you just go away please.

Jeff, don't. You're confusing me.
I mean, do you want me to stay or not?

What were you talking about?
Were you talking about me then?

No.

OK, I'll go.

No Jeannie please. You just stay there.

You go, please.

Well who?

Just remember, she was my fiance.
You keep your hands to yourself.

Well, I'm glad you're holding up sis,
but all I'm saying is
Doctor Lawyer is supposed to be the best,

and only the best people go to his clinic.

But I'm not mad, Wendy.
-Well you'd be mad not to take up my offer.

Look sometimes,
when you lose someone you love

you don't realize until afterwards the stress you've been under.

You try to be brave. You try to cope and the next thing you know you're screaming obscenities in the supermarket

and subscribing to fruitcake monthly.

I mean what harm could it do? You could treat it as a holiday.

My idea of a holiday is lying on a beach in the South of France,

not two weeks in a funny farm having electric shock therapy.

Yeah, well, I don't want you to be miserable.

Why not? Why shouldn't I be?

You know,
sometimes I dream that he's still alive

and when I wake up he's not here.

I wonder whether
he's up there somewhere and he's at peace.

Happy.

Maybe he's an Angel?

That's it. Very good.
Now a little higher, higher, higher.

That's good you're getting it.

Oh, dear.

I'm not sure I'm up to this.
It was a lot easier when I could pick things up with my hands.

Don't worry, we'll make a poltergeist of you yet. Now let me see.

Maybe we should
try something a little easier.

You alright?

Jeannie, I've got something to tell you, and if I don't get it off my mind,

I think the brain is going to explode.

That would be very messy.

Marty is not dead.

Well, he's dead, but,

I can see him.

The thing is, Jeannie, Marty is a ghost.

And I can see him. He talks to me. He even helps me.

Am I supposed to laugh or what?

I knew as soon as I said it, that you'd think I was crazy.

Jeff, you sound totally insane.

But you've got to believe me Jeannie. You know, he's a ghost, and only I can see him.

And he talks to you?

Yeah.

Where is he?
-He's absolutely fine. Well, he's dead,

but he's absolutely fine. It's brilliant, isn't it?

Do you think that you need to see someone?

Jeannie, I'm just an ordinary bloke whose
best friend just happens to be a ghost.

So is it all sorted at the casino then?

Yeah, I've arranged
with Three Piece to work as a hostess,

see if I can find out if Karen's
really got her fingers in the till.

Yeah, but it should be me Jeannie. I shouldn't be here.

It's just for a week, Jeff. And
what harm can it do? Treat it as a holiday.

Will you be alright
in the office on your own?

It's worked out fine.

Let's face it, I needed a job. I needed to do something.

Yeah, well Marty'll be pleased.

Well, he would have been pleased.

I always said I'd look after you
if anything ever happened to him.

You, look after me? -Yeah.

Hello.
-Hi there.

Hello there.
-Jeff Randall how'd you do.

You two joining us at the T?

No, it's just me actually.

Ah well, you'll be a new man
when you leave here,you mark my words.

I come here every year
for a week. For a top up.

Does me the world of good.

Jeannie, I can't stay here
a week with these loonies

They're not loonies. They're just
idle rich people. You need to get treated.

Jeff. Dr Lawyer. Welcome to Trilby Park.
- Hello there

And you must be Mrs Randall?

No, we just work together.

Keith, bags.

Right, well I'll go in then. See ya.

Good luck.
-Thank you

Did you have a good journey?

Think of Trilby Park not as a hospital,
but as a five star hotel for the mind

where your emotional, mental and
dare I say it, spiritual side

can be cossetted, manicured, massaged,
and given a nice, gentle workout.

So now you settle in and unpack, Jeff.

Change into your karma suit.

I'll see you for our first session at 5.

You're not the first haunting
I've had to deal with.

There's a little kink
in there that needs smoothing out.

In a week's time, I bet you there will
be no figments left in your imagination.

Till later then.

What are you doing here?
-Don't even ask.

What is this place?

It's kind of a health farm.

What are you doing in a health farm for God sake?
You're the most healthy bloke I know.

Maybe Marty, I just needed a rest, yes?

A rest? Hah!

You've only had one case since I died.

Look why don't you just
go and haunt somebody else?

I can't. You're the only one who can see
me and the further away from you I get
the less powers I have.

I get very faint and then
I start to lose my grip on the world.

A little bit like you, Jeff.

Marty, please,
will you just leave me alone?

I really don't need you here,
just at the moment, you know.

Oh! Well, have you
ever considered that I might need you?

Do you know what it's like being dead?

But you can't just keep popping up
unannounced all the time.
It could be embarrassing.

Yes I know.

Marty, I know that, but look, why can't
you just think about others for a change?

This is where it all happens.

They come in here rich and they leave poor.

It's a funny thing, innit? -What is?

The amount of money won and lost in here.

And Karen, little Karen, my precious
Karen. She's just taking a few pounds.

You're not sure Three Piece.
You've no real evidence.

There are discrepancies.

I've been adjusting things myself.
Using my own money. No one else knows.

Why does she do it?

That's for me to find out now, OK?

Yoohoo. New guy.
-Hello there.

Care to join me?

Well I was--

He's spoken for.

Am I?

Don't be shy.

Yeah.

You sit here next to me.

Oh, right, thank you, I wasn't sure
what the system was. Hello there.

Still finding your feet?

You watch her.
She'll find more than your feet.

You know why she's here, don't you?

Nymphomania. -Cecil--

You know Doctor Lawyer
doesn't like us to use terms like that.

Just ignore Cecil.
He's a rather lively imagination.

I was actually originally
treated for M.E.A.

Morbid Erotic Addiction.

Right, and what's that then?

Nymphomania basically.

Oh right, thank you, thank you very much.

You'll soon settle in.

I'll look after you.

You know when I'm here, I almost
feel more at home than when I'm at home.

I know what you mean.

I always feel very calm
and safe when I'm in here.

You've been here before then, yeah?

This is my third time.

I'm on my 5th. I arrived last night
and I always feel I'm coping and then
something else goes missing.

Cecil suffers from I.A.S.

Inappropriate Acquisition Syndrome.

Yeah, I'm a kleptomaniac.

It wouldn't be so bad, but I can never
remember where I put anything I've nicked.

Oh.

I'll have to be running
along to see the old witch doctor.

Nice meeting you.

Cecil, welcome back.

Thank you doctor.

Now, I believe you have something for me.

Yes, umm--

Well?

Yeah, yeah, of course.

Oh, of course.

Oh yeah, yes.

Here we are.

Good boy.

Have you been practicing your mimicry?

Not really.

You've got to keep up
with your lessons boy.

Otherwise you'll become feeble
and faint and impotent.

One of those silly ghosts who turns up
wearing sheets going whoo all over the place.

That's not what we want, is it? -No.

We want you to be a powerful,
smart, sophisticated ghost about town.

Well, that sounds more like me.

Good, so let's hear
what you've been doing.

Um--

Um--

Go ahead punk make my day.

Um--

I'll be back.

Or Casablanca, the bloke from Casablanca.

OK, now concentrate on me. Try to do me.

See human beings have
a natural tendency to see faces in clouds,

flames. Really quite random shapes.

I don't wish to be rude doctor, but I'm
not seeing things through flames
or faces or little fleeting images.

I'm seeing a real person who can walk,
who can talk he can even blow stuff at me.

Yes, but you see, we must start from the
premise that that is impossible, Jeff.

Yeah, I know,
but I'm sorry doctor, he is real.

No, he's not.

No, sorry, I'm sorry

That is the thought that
you must keep centered in your mind.

That will be a cornerstone.
Our opening bid.

Right, but listen doctor, I'm not even sure
that I want to stop believing in him.

Well, there's the rub.

Already we can see a pattern.

Can we?
-Yes, I think so.

His death was a great shock to you.

You so desperately
want him to still be here

that you create this fantasy
of yourself that you can see a ghost.

A ghost that nobody else can see.
Your own special secret.

Are you a gambling man Jeff?

No, not really.

Mind you I do the lottery Wednesdays
you know. Why do you ask?

I'm prepared to bet you £100 that you'll
be cured before the end of your week here.

Is that standard psychiatric practice
doctor to have bets with your patients?

I am not a standard psychiatrist, Jeff.

Every day I will strive
to improve my skills.

I will work hard and study hard.

I want to be the perfect ghost
and practice makes perfect.

There, you see.

Granted, I cheated a little. A small
trick, but that is the effect you can
have with just a little practice.

Comfortable? -Yes thank you. -Good.

Don't look so worried.

This is merely a relaxation machine.

I'm going to lull you into
a state of half sleeping, half waking,

so that I can gently probe
some of your secrets.

OK Doctor. Let's just do it then please.

Close your eyes then, Jeff.

Just slowly let yourself go.

Feel yourself floating.

Relax all your muscles.

Let your hands go limp.

Your arms, your legs.

Your knees.

You have to believe Mr. Hopkirk.

Become the other. Lose yourself.
You are they, and they are you.

Now you're feeling
your breathing getting slower.

And slower.

Turning to liquid.

And now I'm going to take you deeper.

And deeper.

Are you alright Mr Hopkirk?

Yes. No. I don't know aha. Ah.

I feel faint.

A terrible pain in my head.

I think we've
had enough for today's lesson.

Now, let's get this straight, you tosser.

There's no such thing as ghosts, alright?

Yes.
-Good.

You don't see ghosts.
They don't exist. Is that clear?

Yes.

You love me.

You love Trilby Park.
You think I'm a genius, don't you?

Yes.
-You'd do anything for me, wouldn't you?

Wouldn't you?

Yes.

Good, now when you wake up you will
of course remember none of this.

Apart from the bit
about the ghosts, obviously. Alright?

Yes.
-Good boy.

Hi Karen.

You caught on already. - Yeah, I'm used
to it. I used to work as a waitress.

Well, you'll get some
big tips here, if they win.

Mostly, of course they lose though.

Do you like it here?

It's OK, I only meant
to do it for a few weeks to fill in.

Scotch please, no ice.

Thank you.

Do you know him?

Has he been here before?

Constantine. Used to win a lot, but not
lately. No tips off him, I'm afraid.

Ah.

Oh.

Wakey wakey, rise and shine.

God, I'm so bored. How long
have you got to to stay in this place?

Jeff, I said how long do you have to stay
here. We should be out working on a case.

Jeff, will you please stop ignoring me?

I've got some
new powers to show you. Watch.

There, what do you think of that?

Jeff, would you please
stop flaming ignoring me?

Jeff. Jeffffff!!!!

All right Marty. For God sake.
Will you go away? You don't even exist

Course I exist. How do you think
that glass floated up in the air?

What glass?

That one -It's not floating Marty.

Not yet. Watch.

You see I was just imagining that Marty.

I'm just imagining you.

I've created you so that I feel
less upset and guilty about your death

Really? You really feel upset?
- Yes, I do.

Really, really upset?

Yes, alright Marty, I've said it.
Look I've got a terrible headache

and I could really do without you
cackling on first thing in the morning.

And guilty? -Yes. -How guilty?

Very, alright? -On a scale of 1 to 10?

Marty, get out, get out.
You're not real and I need to get dressed.

I go outside, everything's fine.

Then I'll black out, lose whole days
and all I know is I have to get back here.

It's costing me a fortune.

But it's worth it, despite the headaches.

Right, but Doctor Lawyer
doesn't actually cure anyone?

Oh, but he does. I used to be terrible.

I had countless damaging
relationships with men.

Well,

if you can call them relationships.

I'm not obsessed with sex any more.

Thank God Doctor Lawyer stopped all that.

But now, I have these terrible,
irrational, violent outbursts.

When you're looking at me, you don't
know whether I'm about to snog you or
rip your heart out.

Doctor Lawyer says we're
getting closer to the root of the problem.

Once you go deeper,
it's like peeling an onion.

Hey. -Leave it

All right.

Bloody hell. Does that sort
of thing happen often around here?

Happened a couple of times before.
Too much stress and then--

It's three o'clock.

Time for my session.

So what would happen
if Jeff stopped believing in me?

What would happen if your
chosen one ceased to believe in you?

It has happened before.

Though it's very rare.

And not altogether pleasant.
-How do you mean?

Well, you begin to
lose your substance. Your reason.

You would become a restless, wandering
spirit, a gibbering phantom, a cry on
the wind, a shriek in the night.

Never mind about that. Have you been practicing your lessons, Mr Hop--?

Mr. Hopkirk?

Mr. Hopkirk?

Marty?

Marty?

Jeff, this isn't a health farm.
It's a mental hospital.

No, it's a Therapeutic Center,
Marty. It's where you--

It's a nut house.

What are you doing here?
Have you gone completely mad?

You're not crazy.

Marty. I am stood here now,
talking to a dead man,

But I do exist.
-Prove it Marty. Go on, prove it.

I'm fed up with trying to prove it.

Marty, I'm sorry.

Well, can't expect instant results, Jeff.

With each session,
we just hope to get one step closer.

So tell me, can you see him now?

No.

Yes.

Where is he?

He's right next to you doctor.
There doctor right next to you

He's just right next to you.
He's pulling stupid faces at you
like you're a monkey.

Is he exactly as you remember him?
- Exactly, yeah.

Well let's see what we can do alright?

Jeff, I want you to relax.

Begin to drift away.

I want you to feel
your muscles go all soft and loose.

Your whole body.

Floppy.

Your eyelids feeling heavy. Ripples
of energy flowing through your skin.

You're like a vast ocean.

Relaxing, ebbing, swelling and relaxing.

Feeling happy,

relaxed and--

Hi, sorry, I'm late. How are you doing?

I'm nearly ready. Can you tie me up?

Oh, I can't wait for my day off.

How about you?

Oh, I just get bored. I don't really
have a life outside here anymore.

No boyfriend? -No like. -Oh.

I needed--

Jeannie, I needed to talk to you about--

Something.

Right.

Well, let's get to the important stuff.

You don't strike me as a wealthy man
Randall. Who's paying for your treatment here?

Wendy.

Wendy?

Is she any use to me?
She's obviously rich. Who is Wendy?

Jeannie's sister.

Jeannie being?

The woman that I work with.

Oh, I see.
And what exactly do you do, Randall?

Private detective.

What?

Ghost.

What do you mean, private detective?

What are you doing here?

What are you up to? Who really hired you?

Ghost.
-Oh shut up about ghosts.

Nobody believes in ghosts.
Tell me what you know.

Ghost. -What do you know? -Ghost.

Come in Alice.

I want you to do something for me, Alice.

I know I shouldn't do it.

I know it's wrong. I've never done
anything like this before I came here, but,

it was the only way
I could get him to notice me.

Who?

Percy.

Percy! Well, who's Percy?

Head of security.

Three Piece?

He doesn't even know I exist.

I thought,
if he could catch me if he would--

But just a minute--

so you're doing all this
so that Three Piece will notice you?

Jeff.

Jeff, don't do this again.

Ah.

Jeff, man, what's he done to you?

What's happening?

36 Red.

Can't thank you enough, Jeannie.

If you two would
only just talk to each other.

I couldn't.
-Well, you can now.

God. I feel more like
Mary Poppins than Sam Spade.

I mean look at you Three Piece.

You're really just
a great big cuddly teddy bear, aren't you?

If there's anything
I can ever do for you, Jeannie?

Jeannie, there's a phone call for you.

Three Piece, get Constantine...

The thing of it is, Doctor Lawyer,

the last time we spoke,

you owed me 50,000 pounds.

Yes, I know,
and I'm, I'm trying to sort it out.

I thought I could just, you know,
win it back. -Shut up!

when I'm talking.

Now,

you owe me

250,000 pounds.

Here take, take these please take them
they're worth a fortune.

I can get more I'm working on it,
I, I just need more time.

You haven't got any more time
and I, I don't want your trinkets.

What I want

is your clinic.

No no no.

No, no you can't.

No is a word I don't understand.

But let me tell you
a few words that I do understand.

Fracture. Dislocate.
Dismember. Eviscerate.

Now, shall we--

come to terms?

Everything alright?
-I don't know. I've gotta go.

The cleaner at the office called.
She's trapped some kind of animal.

At last. I wouldn't 'ave rung you,
but I'm working nights and what with
Mr Randall being in the 'ospital

That's alright Mrs Coles
but what's going on?

Well I don't know.

Something's got in,
like a dog or something.

I'd done downstairs,
Marshall & Snellgrove.

I was just coming in here when I heard it.

Heard it in there. Something moving about.

At first I thought it were burglars.

But then I locked the door, it found it
couldn't get out, it just went berserk.

Well, that's when I knew
it couldn't be a person.

It was some sort of wild animal.

Look--

Let me out of here!

It's alright, let her go.

It'll take me days to clean this up. Days.

How'd she get in here?

Come.

Alice, sit down.

So who's he working for?
What does he know? What did you find out?

They're investigating a case. The casino.

What case?
-I don't know.

I was surprised.
Don't be annoyed. I couldn't get out.

I panicked. I remember fear, panic.

I couldn't get out.

I remember. All I remember is--

You remember nothing.

As always.

Nothing.

I am sorry about this, Mr Randall.
I've been under a lot of pressure
and I think I may have gone mad.

What the bloody hell are you playing at?

What's going on here?

Perhaps Jeff can tell you.

Wake up, Jeff.

Jeff, we have an unwelcome visitor.

Jeff.

Deal with her, would you?

Jeff, are you all right?

I'm afraid he can't hear you.

He will only respond to my voice now.

Oh, this is much neater,

A mentally unbalanced patient,
surprised in the night, goes beserk,

strangles the poor unfortunate woman,

then, filled with remorse,

hurls himself out of the window.
You understand, Jeff?

You understand what you have to do?

Good.

I'll leave you to it then.

Jeff, listen to me, it's Marty. Stop it.

What are you doing?

You have to believe Mr. Hopkirk.

Stop it, Jeff.

This is the voice of Doctor Lawyer
and I command you to stop.

Become the other. Lose yourself.

You are they. They are you.

Listen to me, Jeff. Listen to me.

Randall, what do you think you're doing?
-OK, Jeff, right arm back,
and smash him in the face.

Forward.

Stop.

Listen to me, do as I say.
-Right uppercut.

Duck.

For God's sake Doctor Lawyer.

This is no way to run a therapeutic clinic.

I will not be beaten by you. Awake.

Wake up, all of you.

Come out.

Come out from your rooms.
Listen to me, I command you.

Come to me now, and do as I say.

Listen to my voice.

These two. These two here.
Randall and the girl.

They are here to harm you.

Those two. Get rid of them.
Rip them to pieces.

Tear their arms off.

Well go on. Do it, get rid of them.

Fracture, dislocate, dismember, eviscerate.

Destroy them.

Stop. Listen to my voice.

Go back. Damn it, they can't hear me.

Stop. That's far enough.

Jeff Randall is not your enemy.

Doctor Lawyer is your enemy,

and must be stopped for good.

Turn around
and never listen to his voice again.

Right. I see what's happened here.

He's doing my voice.

Don't listen. Don't listen!

Don't listen to my voice. -Do it now
-No, listen to me

Don't listen to him being me.

Jeff.

Jeff.

For God's sake wake up!

It's alright now.

When I say the word, you will wake up
and be completely back to normal.

Oh, and one more thing.

Whenever I say the word,

you'll believe that Marty Hopkirk is the
most fantastic person in the whole world.

And the word is--

Jeff.

Eggbound!

Jeannie. Fancy a drink?

Yes.

Right. -Let's get out of here.

Marty was a great bloke wasn't he?
Fantastic singer, oh, and his dancing--

You know I'm very pleased
he's not a mutant baby.

I decided to call him Marty,
after Mr. Hopkirk.

I'm going back to Latvia to the baby's father.

So, you'll be leaving us, Felia?

I'm leaving. I'm leaving

You'll be really difficult to replace you know. We'll miss you.

I'll miss you.

Well, if all this has taught me
anything Jeannie, it's that I'm not mad.

No. So don't try and tell me
you see Marty's ghost any more will you?

No, I won't. I got that all out of me.

Maybe Doctor Lawyer did do some good.

Yeah, the crazy fool, maybe he did.

Well, that all worked out well in the end shortarse.

Marty Hopkirk. You're not such a perfect
physical specimen yourself you know.You're

Eggbound. -Tall, handsome, debonair. Oh Marty stop it. You're just being a bugger.

Eggbound.

Godlike. Virile. -Eggbound. Eggbound. Eggbound. Eggbound. Eggbound. Eggbound.

Marty, no, please.