Quantum Leap (1989–1993): Season 3, Episode 11 - Runaway - July 4, 1964 - full transcript

Sam must put up with a bratty older sister and keep the family together while saving his mother who disappears.

Theorizing that one could
time-travel within his own lifetime,

Dr. Sam Beckett stepped into
the Quantum Leap Accelerator

and vanished.

He woke to find himself
trapped in the past,

facing mirror images
that were not his own,

and driven by an unknown force

to change
history for the better.

His only guide on
this journey is Al,

an observer from his own time

who appears in
the form of a hologram

that only Sam can see and hear.

And so Dr. Beckett finds himself
leaping from life to life,

striving to put right
what once went wrong

and hoping each
time that his next leap

will be the leap home.

You pig!

Ah! What are you doing?

Shut up back there!

Alex, leave your
little brother alone.

I'm a kid.

You're a twerp.

- Ow!
- I said shut up!

Oh, no, Butchie!

Oh, boy.

Leaping around in time, I've run up
against some pretty tough characters.

Violent bikers, mafia hit men,

psychotic killers,

but never anyone
quite as menacing

as a big sister.

Noogie time,
Butchie, noogie time.

Noogie time, Noogie time,

Alexandra, must you torment
your little brother?

- Yeah.
- Why?

Somebody's got to.

You gotta toughen
him up for Pop Warner.

Right, Butchie?

Yeah, yeah,
I... I guess so.

All this toughening up
is going to kill the kid.

Mom, that's
a risk we have to take.

Hey, Butchie, think fast.

Oh, come on, Butchie.

How do you ever expect to make
first-string with sissy reflexes?

Hank, stop it.

Listen, uh, think maybe we
could stop up here somewhere?

I really have to
go to the bathroom.

What?

You just went back at Stuckey's
ten minutes ago.

I did? I mean,
I did, but I didn't.

I... I mean,
I really have to go again.

Tough luck, scout.

We got a schedule to keep.

That's a great book.

How did you hear about it?

The Feminine Mystique,
by Betty Friedan?

It started the whole feminist
revolution in the '60s.

Yes, but it just came out.

I know, but I mean...

I think that's what
they're predicting

is gonna happen with it.

Hey, hey, hey, state line.

Bye-bye, Wyoming.
Hello, Colorado.

President Johnson
signed the act into law

which will prohibit
racial discrimination

in employment, places of
public accommodation,

publicly-owned facilities,
union memberships,

- and federally funded programs.
- The Civil Rights Bill 64.

Remember that, kids,
everyone deserves

a fair chance in this country.

All right, Hank.

Hank?

Oh, no that's our song.

Your song?

Yes, your father and I danced
to that at the graduation prom.

I was going off to Northwestern,

your father was going to play
football at Florida State.

How come you didn't go?

Um,

your father
persuaded me to stay.

Did you know he used to
sing this song to me?

Emma, come on.

Excuse me, but, uh,

how long before we get home?

Well, let's see, that'll be just
a little bit over 6,000 miles.

6000, mmm...

Mom, I think
Butchie's gonna puke again.

Alex, a lady doesn't say
"puke," she says "throw up."

Yeah, well he looks like
he's gonna do that, too.

Butchie, are you carsick?

Yeah.

Yeah, could we just
pull up somewhere,

like the next corner,
and drop me off?

- Hank, I think you better pull over...
- Honey, honey.

We gotta stick to the schedule,

otherwise the whole
trip will be snafued.

What do you think you're doin'?

I'm seeing how close we are.

If you were the navigator,
we'd be in Chihuahua by now.

Oh, come on, honey.

Why don't you just stick to
working the radio?

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Come on.
Fold it right, will you?

I may not be able
to read a stupid map,

but I know a lot about
more important things.

1300 hours.

We're supposed to
be at Wild Willy's.

Oh, great.

Giant vegetables,
two-headed snakes,

and buffalo chimps.

Buffalo chimps?

Okay, Butchie boy, you're next.

Hank, if the boy
doesn't want to...

Emma, he's been bugging me
about this the whole trip.

Now, I'm gonna see him pet a
chimp if it's the last thing I do.

I'll be at the snack bar.

Oh, Mom...

Just do
as your dad says, Butchie.

He seems to know
what's best for everybody.

Daddy, maybe we should take
a before picture.

So we can remember
what he looked like.

Look, Dad,
I don't really want to go.

Get in there, monkey boy.

Keep smiling, Butchie.

- Hey!
- Ah!

All right, that's it.

Don't you like my knee?

Sam, you gotta be Butchie.

No, I don't.

What are you gonna do about it?

That's the rule.

I'm gonna break it.

I'd like to see you
try it, monkey boy.

I don't have to take this.

Oh, yes, you do.

Ow!

Just remember,
when you least expect it,

expect it.

Boy, she's gonna have
a big future as a mud wrestler

and she's only
fourteen-and-a-half.

She called me monkey boy?

- She did. She called me monkey boy.
- Yeah, well, that's her job.

Hey! You're 13, she's your big sister.
That's her job.

13?

I'm old enough to
be my own father.

Well, that's a first.

Let's see,
your name is Butchie Rickett.

And you and your family just left
your home in Pahokee, Florida

for a 9,000-mile
trip across the country.

Al, I've done this before.

What?
You've done what?

I've done this.
Taken this trip.

I mean, not this trip,
but I mean when I was 11, 12.

My father packed us into
our tiny little station wagon

and we went across the United
States on a summer vacation.

I guess I must've
blocked it out.

Yeah, well, once was enough.

Tell me what I gotta do
so I can get out of here.

Take it easy.
You've only got 5,900 miles to go.

Well, let me guess.

I'm here to stop the evil sister

from noogying Butchie to death?

Be nice if it was that simple.

It's July 4, 1964

and when the fireworks
go off tonight,

your mom, Butchie's mom,
runs out on the family.

What, she abandons them?

Well, they never see
or hear from her again.

- I can't believe that.
- I can.

Is that the guy
she runs off with?

Well, Ziggy doesn't have
any data on that,

but it doesn't take a hybrid computer
to figure out what's on his mind.

Butchie, I want you
to meet someone.

Come here.

Billy, this is Butchie.

Hello, Butchie.

Hi.

Your boy's got quite a grip.

And Alexandra, well,

she's running around somewhere.

Billy McCann,
I can't believe this.

God, that sounds nice.
Everybody up north calls me William.

Well, you'll always be
Billy to me.

Look at you.
Has it been 14 years?

Um, 15.

You look even
prettier than I remember.

That is the oldest
line in the manual.

Come over here.

- I'm out of here, Sam.
- Where are you going?

I want you to meet someone.

Trust me, Sam, I've seen this
scenario before, and I don't like it.

Please don't let it happen
to Emma and her family.

And Beth, this is Butchie.

Hi, Butchie.

Hi.

You two are almost the same age.

I'm going to high school
in September.

What grade are you in?

Uh, I'm, uh,

I'm between grades.
It's the summer.

Uh, Mom, we really should be
hitting the road, don't you think?

Oh, darling,
I'd like to spend some time

with my old friend here.

Guess you two went to high school
together or something, huh?

Yeah, we were on the same
speech team together.

State champs in Dramatic Interp.

"What satisfaction
canst thou have to-night?"

"The exchange of thy love's
faithful vow for mine."

"I gave thee mine
before thou didst request it

"And yet I would it
were to give again."

"Wouldst thou withdraw it?
For what purpose, love?"

Barf. What is that from?

Romeo and Juliet.

And I thought all you ever read
was Mad Magazine.

Oh, yeah.
Well, they did, uh,

a Shakespeare parody
in the last issue.

Oh.

I can't believe
you remembered that.

How could I forget?
Those were the best times ever.

Well, what about Northwestern?

I heard you got your PhD.

And you could have gotten
yours if you'd come, too.

Yeah.

Well, other things
were more important.

I'm a housewife and a mom.

Is your wife here?

Laura passed away some time ago.

Oh, Billy, I'm so sorry.

We're okay, now. Thanks.

I'm sorry.

Listen, Mom,

Dad's probably
looking all over for us.

Hey, hey, hey, Butchie,
think fast.

Oh! Scout,

reflexes, reflexes, reflexes.

Thanks, Dad.

Hank, look who's here.

Billy.

Billy McCann.

Hank.

I'm sorry I didn't
recognize you, man.

You got bigger
since I saw you last.

You, too.

Oh, well, you know,
prairie dogs and buffalo chimps.

They'll do it to you every time.

Well, what brings you up here?

Summer vacation.

Beth loves animals.

Butchie boy here has been yammering
about petting a buffalo chimp

ever since we left Florida.
Right, scout?

I guess so.

So you stayed on
after Florida State?

Yeah, yeah.

I broke my hip freshman year, and...
I don't know

college wasn't really for me,

so I started delivering poultry

and what do you know,
I own my own factory now.

So how about yourself?

Oh, Billy got his doctorate.

He's teaching college.

Oh, hey, well,
that's great, Doc.

So, where you workin'?

I was at Northwestern
for seven years

and then I was at Yale,
Cornell, Berkeley...

Oh, sounds like you can't
hold down a job, eh, scout?

Actually, we've got a couple
of offers from back East.

Beth and I are trying
to make up our minds.

Oh, that sounds so exciting.

Well, we probably should
be hitting the road, eh?

- Yep, 1400 hours.
- Okay.

Listen, are you...

It was real good
seeing you again, Billy.

Are you passing through northern
California on your trip?

Oh, yeah, uh...

What? July 26, 1700 hours,
we're due in Frisco.

Well, we live right across
the bay, in Berkeley.

Why don't you all
come over for dinner?

Oh, that would be wonderful.

Oh, God.

It's great seeing
you again, Billy.

You, too, Emma.

Come on, scout,
let's go find your sister.

Take it easy, Butchie.

The good news was that Emma
was still with her family.

The bad news?

You're over, you're over.
Mom, Butchie's over.

So was I.

Butchie, you know better.

He's over.
He's over.

Over what?

On my side.

His shoes are
covered with monkey doo.

Oh, have a cow, why don't you?

Have a cow?

Have a purple-nerple.

Ow! Ow! Get off.
Get off!

Okay, come on, come on,
come on, separate.

It'll be fun
visiting Billy and Beth.

Well, if we have the time.

Oh, let's make the time, hmm.

Well, honey, we got
Fisherman's Wharf,

Golden Gate,

Sausalito, Chinatown,
Top o' the Mark.

Our schedule's already packed.

Well, then let's, uh, change it.

Uh, I think it'd be
better if we don't.

Stay out of this, Butchie.

No, you can't, Sam.

- Al...
- Yes?

- What're you doing?
- It's called reading.

Checking up on you.

You have to see that Emma never
sees Bill or calls him again.

How?

First you string letters...

You have to get that card
and toss it out the window.

Then you string those into
things called sentences.

I can't do that.

That's because you're a moron.

Alexandra, I told you,

don't call your brother a moron.

But, Mom, he is.

You got to. It's the only way
you're gonna save this family

and leap out of here.

Hey, Em...
Uh, M-Mom.

Huh-huh?

Can I take a look at that card?

Thanks.

Well, go on, toss it out.

Sam, toss it out.

Go ahead.

Okay, good, and now
don't ever litter again.

This is just
a special case this time.

Oh, no.

What's wrong?

Oh, I was holding
the card by the window,

and it just kind of flew out the window.
I'm sorry.

W-what?

Hank, stop. Turn around.

Honey, we're never
gonna find it.

Hank.

Look, when we get to Frisco
we'll call Information.

Maybe I won't have to.

Damn.
Emma leaves after all.

Hank, that was Billy.

You can't stop, Sam.

No, no, it wasn't.

Yes, it was.

I'm sure it wasn't.
Keep on driving, Dad.

Hank, we have to stop
and go back and help them.

Mom, even if it was Billy,
he can fix it himself.

He's right, honey. There's a gas
station a couple of miles back.

What kind of example is that
to set for the children?

It's a fine example.

Oh, yes? What's that?

It teaches us to be more self-reliant,
to take care of ourselves.

Go to the head of the class.

Hank, stop and turn around.

Dad, we're gonna
get off our schedule.

He's got a point, honey.

What is helping him for
10 minutes going to do?

Destroy this family.
Sam!

Just keep going, Dad.
He'll be fine.

Hmm, I guess your mom's right.

Sam, I'm out of here.

I'm warning you, Butchie,
you're on my side. Get over.

Well done.

Well, I guess that PhD doesn't
come in handy for auto repair.

No, I am worthless
when it comes to cars.

Yeah, well.
Be prepared. Right, scout?

Yeah. Well, we ought to
hit the road, huh?

Thanks again.
It's lucky we ran into you.

Yeah.

- We'll do it again soon.
- Okay.

Thanks to Doctor
what's-his-name back there,

we're an hour off our schedule.

If it's our schedule,

how come you decide
when and what we do?

Because I'm the dad.

- So that makes you boss?
- Of course.

- Look, maybe if we all just...
- Butchie.

Yeah, twerp.

I don't know why we can't be
a little more spontaneous.

Spontaneous?

If that's what you want,
why don't you

ride with Mr. Spontaneous
back there?

So smart he doesn't even bring a
screwdriver on a cross-country trip.

Huh!

If he had extra room,
I just might.

You want me to turn around?

Oh, no, no, no.
I don't want to throw off our schedule.

We're already late.
What difference does it make?

Then stop here.

Fine.

Mom.

Aren't you gonna go after her?

She'll come back.

W-w-what if she doesn't?

Mom.

Mom.

What's going on, Mom?

You wouldn't understand.

Come on, I'm 13.

Yeah, my little man.

Gosh, how'd you
grow up so fast, huh?

You and Alex will be off to
college before you know it.

I don't know,
I'm just kind of...

Afraid of being alone?

No.

I mean, I'm already
by myself most of the day.

Daddy's at work,
and you kids are at school,

and I've got time to do
whatever I want.

It's just

not like I thought it would be.

I know I've got
no right to complain.

Not with what
Grandma went through

and other folks struggling
for money and jobs.

Your Daddy makes a good living.

Yeah.

I know I should be happy.

No, Mom.

Not if you don't feel fulfilled.

Now, this... this
doesn't mean

that I don't love
you and Alex and Daddy.

I know,
I... I... I know, Mom.

It's just that I, um,

want something more.

I want to spend
some part of my life

as me.

Whoever that is.

Not just as someone's,

I don't know, daughter or wife

or mother.

I want to...

I want to stop feeling like...

A non-person.

Yeah.

A non-person.

I feel like a non-person.

Then you should do more.

You should do something more.

What?

Oh!
"Do something more."

That was the theme
of my speech at Graduation.

You were valedictorian?

Yeah.

I wrote this great speech

about taking chances,

and reaching
beyond the expected.

Guess I should have
listened to myself, huh?

Instead of spending my life

wondering.

About the road not taken.

Yeah.

Well,

guess it's too
late for that now.

No, it's not.

That's what I'm saying.
You can do anything you want.

You could... you could go
in a whole new direction.

You could go back to school.

I... I can't do that.

Not with all those young kids.

Yeah, but they're...
You're young, too.

In the '60s,
housewives started...

Will start going
back to college.

How do you know?

Well, my...

A lot of my friends' moms
are starting classes again.

- Really?
- Yeah.

And you're smart

and you owe it to yourself
to do the best thing for you.

What if Daddy doesn't think
it's such a good idea?

It's not his decision,
it's yours.

Besides, you don't know how he's
gonna react until you talk to him.

What? No. No way.

I'm talking about
a few classes, at the J.C.

Honey, it's called "junior
college" because it's for kids.

Oh, well, no.
Actually, a lot of adults go.

Butchie.

Besides, we can't afford it.

Well, then I'll
get a part-time job.

Damn it, Emma. Now,
there's no reason for you to be workin'.

Well, then there's no reason
I shouldn't go to college.

You know, junior colleges
are very inexpensive.

You can get
a great education there.

Look, you just keep talking,
mister,

and you're gonna be educated
in a military school.

Hi there, campers,
welcome to Camp Chipmunk.

Hi there, campers, welcome to...

Finally made it, scout.

Know how long it took
to get these reservations?

Six months.

You're in luck.
We just got a cancellation.

They must've gotten ahead
of us when we pulled over.

This is weird, Al. No matter what we
do, we keep running into him.

Well, maybe she told him
where you were going.

Maybe. Sometimes
you can't fight fate.

- Well, you have to, Sam.
- How?

I'm a kid.
Nobody listens to me.

All I do is I... I get
teased and ignored.

You've dealt with a lot tougher
guys than that nozzle over there.

Hey, it would be a lot easier if this
guy Bill were a jerk. But he's not.

He's actually a pretty okay guy.

Well, so is Hank.

Hey, it's 1964,
guys were different then.

- But they're gonna change.
- I don't know.

You gotta give Hank a chance,
'cause if you don't,

Alex gets pregnant in two years and
Butchie doesn't even finish high school.

If she leaves,
she destroys the whole family.

What happens to her?

I don't know.
We don't have any data on Emma.

Just that sometime tonight,
she runs away.

Even if I stop her,

who's to say that she's gonna hang
around here and wait for Hank to change?

Maybe you're right.

Maybe any mother that leaves
her kids isn't worth saving.

You're taking this
personally, aren't you?

No.

All right, yeah.
Maybe I am.

My dad wasn't there for my mom.

So sometimes I could understand
that she left him.

But she left Trudy and me, too,
and I could never understand that.

So, uh,

just make sure they
stay together, Sam.

Al.

I promise you I'll do whatever
I can to keep Emma here.

Okay.

Talking to your
imaginary playmate again, huh?

I thought you stopped believing
in Jack Bobbin when you were six.

I can't believe it.
You're such a baby.

Hank, stop it.
He didn't do anything.

He put his hand on your leg.

Come on, Hank.

Hmm, been a while, eh, Doc?

What's wrong?

Uh, Butchie,
go back to the cabin.

Hank, he didn't do anything.

I saw him put his
hand on your leg!

She made a joke.
I patted her on the knee, that's all.

Yeah, and then
you left it there.

Look, I think we've all had
a little too much to drink.

Let's call it a day.

After we settle this.

Hank!

It's not
high school anymore, Hank.

You can't solve
everything with a fight.

Well, just stay away
from my wife.

And you stay away from me.

What do you know about women?

You're only 13 years old.

I know about Mom.

I mean, you said yesterday that
everybody deserves a fair chance.

Well, yeah. I was
talking about minorities.

Women deserve
equal rights, too, Dad.

Equal rights.

I mean, maybe

one day they're gonna fight
for their own sort of

Civil Rights Act.

What the hell's
gotten into you, scout?

Nothin'. Nothin'.
I just...

I just think that if Mom
wants to go to college,

she should get a chance.
That's all.

College?

I already give her
everything she needs.

The Vista Cruiser,
the color Zenith, the...

She doesn't know it yet,
but I got her

a full karat rock for
our fifteenth this month.

Dad, those are just...

This month?

- Yeah. It's a big as your hand.
- Alex is fourteen-and-a-half.

She's not gonna
be 15 for another...

Well, I... I meant...

I meant our sixteenth.

Mom was pregnant.

She didn't go to Northwestern
because she was pregnant with Alex.

Now, you just
keep talkin', mister,

and I'll put you over my knee.

Were you afraid she wouldn't come
back if she went to college with Bill?

Oh, Dad.

Butchie, your mom...

She's the only woman
I ever loved.

But don't you see?

You're gonna lose her if you don't
start listening to what she needs.

Well...

I'll make you a deal, Son.

I'll talk to your mom.

Great.

If you beat me
back to the cabin.

Oh, Dad.

But, honey,
we're finally doin' so well.

We got the new house, two cars,

and we're gettin'
a pool in the spring.

I don't want any stuff.

Don't you hear me?

I feel like I'm going crazy.

Okay.

Okay, then can you
just tell me this,

what do you want?

I want to stop feeling

like a non-person.

A non-person?

Yeah.

I owe it to myself to
do what's best for me.

I don't know.
I want my own life.

Your own life?

Uh, uh, are you saying
you want to split up?

Oh, no, Hank,

no, I love you.
You know that.

It's just that I feel
like some part of me is dying.

I haven't done
anything with my life.

Yes, you did.
You had two kids.

But this isn't about
our kids, or our family.

I just... I thought

the deal was I make the money
and you make the happy home.

Well, I've made a happy home.

I've made a happy
home for 15 years.

And now what?

Everybody goes away,
and I sit home, waiting.

I don't want to wait anymore.
I want to...

I want to do something for me.

You know, Emma,

you're not crazy,
you're just selfish.

Well, then I'm not alone.

There are other women like me.

And we're all sick of...

We're sick of shopping,

and making
brownies for a living.

I'm sorry,

but I don't have an orgasm
waxing the damn kitchen floor.

Is that what that book says?

That's what I
think of the damn book.

I told you
she was going to run away.

Go find Alex.
Fireworks start in 20 minutes.

Where'd she go?

I don't know.
Out there somewhere,

trying to do
what's best for her.

I don't know, I guess she got
tired of being a non-person.

Dad, Dad, we gotta find her.

Look, your mom has been runnin'
away since the ninth grade,

but believe me, she'll be back.

Not this time.

I said, she'll be back.

Not unless we find her.

What are you doing?

I thought that
Emma was with you.

- So did I.
- She was, a few minutes ago.

- I'm sorry, Sam.
- What happened?

She came by the cabin,
very upset.

It's my fault.

We talked. We decided it was best
to stay at separate campgrounds.

When Emma disappeared,
I assumed she ran off with Bill.

- What happened to her?
- We said our goodbyes.

We didn't research far
enough into the records.

Just tell me where she is.

I dropped her off
at the fire road.

She... she said she
wanted to go for a walk.

In 1993,
a woman's skeletal remains

were found at
the base of Devil's Backbone.

No.

Yes. And the dental
charts match Emma.

Dad.

- Get in this car, scout.
- Mom's in trouble.

- What?
- She's gonna die.

- What the hell are you talkin' about?
- I can't explain.

Sam, we gotta get to
Devil's Backbone now.

We gotta get to
Devil's Backbone now.

Please.

I don't see her.

Stop.

Stop, stop, stop.

Talk to me, Al.

Her remains were found
right at the base of that ridge.

Dad, I don't see her.

What the hell's going on, scout?

- Mom!
- Scout.

You gotta trust me, Dad.
You got any rope?

- Yeah.
- Bring it! Hurry.

Go, Ziggy center me on Emma.

I don't care where
she is, just do it!

God.

Hurry up, Sam!
She's right down here!

Mom. This way.

Sam, hurry.

It's steep as anything here.
She's slipping.

- Mom, hang on.
- Emma.

- Daddy, she's not moving.
- You need my help, Dad.

Hang on, honey!

Oh, my God.

There, honey.

Hold the flashlight. Give me the rope.
Give me the rope!

- Dad, do something.
- Hang on, Mom.

Okay, honey.
I'm gonna throw you the rope.

Mom, don't let go.

Bill, I'm gonna
need your help here.

I think maybe we
should get the ranger.

Okay, go.

Go!

Okay, honey!

Dad, hurry!

Here comes the rope.

Okay, Emma,
reach and grab the rope!

Reach and grab the rope!

Emma, grab the rope!

- Mom, grab it!
- Grab the rope, Mom.

It's right next to
your hand, honey!

She's frozen, Sam.

Shine the light on the rope.

She's not moving, Dad.

- Oh, my God.
- Dad, do something.

We can use the tree.

I'll tie the rope
around my waist,

you can lower me down.

Okay, good thinking, scout.

Come on, honey, get down,
get down, get down here, now.

Point the light right on Mommy.

Now just hold the light there,
and don't let it move. Can you do that?

- Yes.
- Okay, babe.

How you coming, scout?

Let's go.

Hang on, Mom.

- Okay, you ready?
- Yeah.

Butchie, hurry.

Hang on, Emma, hang on.
He's coming.

Hurry.

- You okay?
- Let's go.

Be careful, Butchie.

Hang on, kid.

Keep goin'.

You're almost there, Sam.

Watch out.
Don't knock any rocks.

Easy, Sam.

How you doing, scout?

Almost there.

Come on, hurry.
Get her, Butchie.

Hang on, Emma.
Just hang on.

Mom.

Butchie.

I'm right here, Mom.
Grab my hand.

Go on, Mom, grab him.

Mom, hold on.
Don't let go, please.

Any more rope?

Okay.

Mom, hang on, please.

That's it, scout!

Mom!

Mom, grab my hand!

Hurry, Sam.

Reach, reach down
a little lower, lower, lower.

Grab my hand, Mom.

Mom!

- Emma!
- Mom!

What're you doing down there?

That's it. Grab it, Sam.

Now, pull.

Pull up!

Okay, scout.

Pull, Dad, pull.

Hold on.
Here we go.

Pull up a little more.

Haul her up, Sam.

Stay there. Stay there.
Let it out a little.

- Mom, hang on.
- That's good.

Okay, come on up, Mom.

You gotta get up.

Wrap your hands
around my shoulders.

Now get on my back.
Can you hold on?

Mom, hang on, please.

Pull me up.

Come on, Hank,
you can do it! Pull!

Almost there!

Hang on!

Come on, Dad.

Pull, Dad, pull!

Almost there, Mom.

Come on, baby. Come on, Dad!

Give me your hand, honey.

Give me the other one.

Here we go.
Up we go, now.

That's it.
Just a little further.

Okay, I got you.
I got you.

I thought I lost you.

Oh, God, I almost lost you.

I almost lost you.

I love you so much.

I love you so much.

How'd you know, scout?

How'd you know?

Hey there, scout.

It's a little past
your bedtime, isn't it?

Yeah, well, I guess so.

Well, I think he's
earned an extra hour.

Yeah.

And this next tune
is a special request

by Hank to his
special little lady, Emma.

They make a beautiful couple.

I think they're
gonna make it, Al.

Yeah, I think so.

The big thing is
Emma goes to college.

They even move to Miami,
so she can get

her doctorate in
Speech and Drama.

And they're still together?

Hmm.
They even switch roles.

Hank retires so he can play golf

and hang around the house,
take care of the kids.

And she's still
teaching in the university.

That's great.

So?

When do I leap?

Well, uh,

Ziggy has a very interesting,
uh, hypothesis about that.

Yes, it's called
the Big Sister Theory.

Big Sister Theory?

You...
That's my hair.

Who do you think
you are now, Superman?

Yes.

Will you...
Butchie, let me go.

Not until you
promise never to tease

or abuse your
little brother again.

That means no charley horses,

no noogies,
no wedgies, no ear flicks,

and no purple-nerples.

Okay, okay.

You promise?

I promise. I promise!

Come on!

- You know, Butchie...
- Huh?

You're all right.
For a twerp.

I bought that shirt
with my own money.

That is my Queen T-shirt.

It's not yours, jerk.

Read my lips, barf-head.

That's my shirt,
and I want it back.

Mommy, Leeky ate my doll.

Mommy!

I'm a mommy?