Psych (2006–2014): Season 2, Episode 11 - There's Something About Mira - full transcript

Shawn finds out a secret of Gus's involving a woman he can't say no to. Lassiter learns that Juliet received a higher score on the detectives' exam than he did, prompting a heated competition between them to see who is truly the better detective.

Come on, boys. Sit up, sit up.

Come on, napkins in lap.

Now, listen, we don't
get to go out very often,

so I want you to order
something special.

Harbor grill is one of the Nicest
restaurants in Santa Barbara.

I'm gonna have nachos.

No way.

Dad, I think that guy
over there is a spy.

And he's trying to poison her!

I don't know how to say this,
so I'm just gonna say it.

Megan,



will you marry me?

Y, yes.

Of course, yes!

Come on, guys, you've
seen people propose before.

It's a very special moment.

Especially for a man.

You fall in love with a woman.

You decide you're gonna spend
the rest of your life with her.

Rest of my life with a girl?

- No way!
- I'm never ever gonna get married!

By the way, they're not gonna make it.

Do I need to set this on slow pitch?

Hey.

I swore I saw that guy earlier.



Yeah, He's been following us all day.

I'd say worst PI, ever.

Check this out.

What the, no,

he followed me into the bathroom?

That's my sanctuary.

- I know.
- All right,

we gotta find out what he wants.

And we have to do it in a
way that's cool and clever.

I got it.

Gyro ball!

Hey, watch it!

Let me show you how it's done.

Watch out.

That very well may be the most
humiliating moment of your life.

I pitch better from the stretch.

That's enough.

Hey.

And that was for following
me into the bathroom.

Okay, so you figured
out I was following you.

My name is Mace Rhoden.
I'm a private investigator.

If, I might give you a little criticism,

I don't think you've quite
mastered the private part.

Of course, if you're going
for most obvious detective...

- nailed it.
- What do you want from us?

I was hired to find you... by your wife.

One more tiny piece of criticism.

You haven't mastered the
investigative part either.

Neither of us are married.

Shawn, an I talk to you for a minute?

This guy!

Talkin' about one of us being
married. Can you even imagine that?

Why aren't you laughing?

Why aren't you laughing?

Oh, my god!

You were married?

I can't believe you were married!

Bachelor party is tainted.

I didn't get to give my brilliant
speech I've been planning

- since we were seventh graders.
- You have not.

- You have a book of speeches?
- I wrote those a long time ago.

You already wrote my eulogy?

I don't remember that.

"Gus is survived by his best
friend Shawn Spencer and 12 cats."

Look, the speeches
are not the point, Gus.

The point is, why didn't
you tell me you were married?

I didn't tell anyone. I was embarrassed.

Look, I'm sorry.

I was wrong for not telling you.

But, dude, you know when I get married
for real you'll be standing up there

on that altar, right next
to me, as my best man.

Thank you for saying that.

I need to hear it.

You're welcome.

So who is this Harlot?

It was spring break '97.

I was in Mazatlan with
some college friends.

'97?

Tell me you weren't still
rockin' the sweater vest.

What? No.

Her name was Mira Gaffney.

I'll never forget the
first time I saw her.

Mira was like no other
girl I ever dated.

She could get me to do things
no one else could ever do.

So seriously?

You've never been skydiving?

Well, I really don't like planes.

Or heights.

Or Jumpsuits.

No, you like sweater vests.

I do.

So you're a skydiving virgin?

Yeah!

I'm gonna take you! We'll go!
It's amazing! You're gonna love it!

Okay. Dude, skydiving's one thing,
but how did she get you to marry her?

Three words.

Three little words.

Let's try goldschlager!

And four hours later...

Oh, my god.

And your best man was a goat?

I was supposed to be that goat!

Shawn, we're on me now.

You're right. I'm, I'm sorry.

Man,

I haven't thought about her in so long.

People used to call her hurricane
Mira because she was this wild,

beautiful, insane girl.

So who broke it off?

Me.

And it got weird real quick.

She called me, like,
100 times in one day.

And threatened to
burn down my apartment.

Mira really has a thing for fire?

But there's something about
her. It just stuck with me.

I have never felt that
way about any other woman.

All right, that's it. I
need to meet this trollop.

You wanna come with me?

Yeah!

You bet but, dude, listen, I don't
know if I can control myself around her,

so you have to promise that you'll stop

me from being sucked
into hurricane Mira again.

Just call me the suck-stopper.

Scratch that. Don't,
don't ever call me that.

I wonder why she wants to see me.

I don't know.

Maybe she wants to introduce
you to little Gus junior.

Or not.

Hold it! SBPD!

I said stop!

Hold it!

Look out!

Son of a...

I said freeze, you. SBPD!

You have the right to remain silent.

- O'Hara, how did you just.
- Just had a hunch he lived in the area.

I figured he'd try to lose us by hopping

one of the fences between hope
street and the 101. Let's go.

I'm impressed.

Shut up.

Come on, O'Hara, level with me.
That was really just a hunch?

Yes, for the tenth time.

Did he, like, drop his wallet or a
piece of mail with his address on it?

Have you been to his house before?

Why would I have been to his house?

I don't know. You date.

I just happen to be good
at deductive reasoning.

You know, I've been studying
for the detective's exam,

and the deductive reasoning
part is just killing me.

- Maybe you could tutor me some time?
- Sure. Okay.

You know, if anyone's gonna tutor
you, it should be me. After I do

hold the department record for the
highest score on the detective's exam.

97.2.

What?

I have to go wash out the, drunk tank.

Yeah!

What, did someone beat my score?

Hey. I heard about the collar.

Nice work. Another case closed.

- Chief.
- Yeah?

Did someone score higher than
me on the detective's exam?

I believe O'Hara did.

O'Hara?

You beat my score?

Only by a little.

How much?

98.4.

Gosh, you know, I check all
those scores every three months.

How come I didn't know about this?

Well, because I made
detective when I was in Miami.

So you wouldn't see those results.

And I didn't wanna tell you because
I know how much you hate to lose.

I do not hate to lose.

Look, we both did well on the exam.

And those scores don't matter to me.

What matters to me is that I
respect you as a cop and as a friend,

and I really, really hope this
doesn't become a thing between us.

This is not gonna become
a thing between us.

That Mace guy said this
was the place to meet her.

Maybe she works here.

That wouldn't surprise me.
She's had, like, a thousand jobs.

There's nothing wrong with that.

And she doesn't just work here.

The wine is named Mira.

Maybe they name a wine
after all their employees.

Remind me to grab a bottle
of Leonard on the way out.

Burton Guster?

Gus.

Gus.

Gus!

What do I say? How's my breath?

Relax. Remember the plan.

What plan?

I forgot the plan.

How are you? I haven't seen you in what?

Ten years? And now
look, boom, here you are.

Hi, I'm Shawn.

Hi.

I, I gave him a really
tough riddle on the way over,

so he's probably now just figuring
out that the doctor was a woman.

No, no.

He's done this before. He
did this when we first met.

I think it's kinda cute actually. If
we just keep talking, he'll catch up.

So I hear that you guys have a
detective agency or something.

Mira!

Mira!

Hi.

Hi there.

Welcome.

You look amazing.

No, you do.

- No, you really look amazing.
- No, you do.

A little bit, but, I mean!

The only thing that would have
been better was if you had worn one

of those sweater vests. I love it,
do you still wear those sweater vests?

Gus, I rember the plan. This isn't it.

I know. Let's celebrate
with a drink. Okay?

But not goldschlager, right?

- I'm in trouble.
- l right, just be cool.

And make your armpits stop sweating.

Okay, so this is our
sangiovese from last year.

Goldschlager!

Gus.

So how long have you been working here?

No, no, no. This is my family's
place. We have three wineries.

This one, a new one in Napa, and
then there's the one in Spain,

which of course I can't go to because
I punched the bull in Pamplona.

So, Mira,

what made you wanna see
me after all this time?

Well,

I kinda have some big news.

Is it Gus junior?

- What?
- Nothing.

I'm getting married.

Yeah, yeah. His name is
Jann, and he's from Sweden.

Although he's lived all over the world.

And I met him at this wine
convention a few months ago.

Mira, that's awesome. Congratulations.

Thanks.

So the thing is, Gus, that,
our wedding chapel in Mazatlan,

they actually sent the marriage license
to the U. S the annulment isn't official.

So I kinda just need you to fill
out some paperwork. Is that cool?

- Yes.
- Sure.

- Yes.
- Okay, sure.

Good. I was a little worried.

So when is the big day?

It's actually tomorrow.

On ledbetter beach. It's
just gonna be a small thing.

I kinda wanted it to be here,
but he wanted at a beach.

It's really the only thing he really
wants, so I think I'll let him do it.

It's kinda romantic. And, dad!

Yeah?

Dad, this is Shawn. It's
Shawn, right? Yeah, Shawn.

And this is Gus.

Yes, Guster.

So this is the young man that
tricked you into marrying him?

Yeah.

Typical.

Mira, I need to speak to you.

- Okay.
- Gentlemen.

Only the first glass is free.

- Why don't you come to the wedding?
- Mira.

Please, please, please, please!
Come, come, come, come, come, come!

Very sweet of you, but
we're a little tight.

- What time should we be there?
- Gus.

Shawn, what is wrong with you?

Mira, of course we will come.

Okay, good.

So I'm gonna go get the wedding
info and the annulment papers.

I hope I don't ever
say that sentence again.

Dude.

She just smelled so nice.

Don't judge me, Shawn.

I'm weak.

I can't believe late.

Look, I'm not the one
that spent two hours

picking out the perfect
shirt-tie-eyes combo.

Finally, what the hell am I doing here?

Shawn, you cancelled twice. You're late.

- I'm hungry.
- Look, we're gonna eat lunch.

I promise. There may even be a grilled
cheese bar and some dancing involved.

- What the crab shack?
- Change plans. We're going to wedding.

I can't go to a wedding.
I'm not dressed for wedding.

Dad, you look sharp as a
tack. No one will even notice.

Shawn.

Shawn.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I'm Stacy. I'm Mira's friend.

- Is he with you?
- Yeah he's fine.

I just won him in a bet.

- I know who you are.
- You do?

You're Gus.

Gus!

We've been waiting for you. Mira said
we couldn't start until you got here.

After all, you are a very special guest.

I am?

Don't be nervous, you. You'll do great.

Your spot's just right up front there.

Lucky.

Now get up there!

Okay.

Little tie.

He's here!

Oh, my god.

This is my wedding.

- Gus, that's crazy.
- No, it's not.

It's Mira. It's just like her to
try to pull something like this.

- You gotta get me outta here.
- Okay, relax.

I can have Mexico in four hours.

But we gotta dye your hair
change your name cut off your

- fingertips so you can't be identified.
- I don't need fingertips.

Excuse me, everyone. I'm
afraid we have horrible news.

It seems Jann is missing.

Yes!

That was close! Sweet!

Sweetie pie.

It's...

No, I don't want the water.

Baby, it's been two hours.

I don't think he's coming.

Of course he's not coming.

Didn't show up wednesday for golf,

thursday for the barbeque,
yesterday for the rehearsal dinner.

Why would he show up to his own wedding?

No, dad, you know that he got
called to work on those other things.

I can't believe you talked me into this.

Baby, can we at least let
the people eat something?

No.

Nobody gets to eat until I'm married!

That's it, Shawn.

I'm outta here.

It's rude to invite people
to an event and not feed 'em.

Somebody fix it!

Look at her in that dress.

She's so beautiful.

Dude, I gotta get you outta here.

This must be how she felt
after I annulled our wedding.

I feel so bad for her.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, let's hit it.

What?

- Mira.
- Yeah?

I am so sorry to hear about Jann.

We'll help you find him.

- You will?
- We will?

Yes, we don't have any cases right
now. We're more than happy to help.

Guster!

Thank you.

Just finished my case
reports for the week,

spell-checked, copied, and
collated, time to spare.

Good for you.

Exactly. O'Hara, I do hope you're
not falling behind on your paperwork.

Those reports look great, O'Hara.

Listen, can you translate
these files into Spanish?

No problema.

You speak Spanish?

It's a requirement in Miami.

Well, there's not that very large a
Latino population here in Santa Barbara.

That's so hot! Matt!

Did you just brew this?

It's not too hot for me.

Please tell me you didn't
just burn your mouth because

you're still pissed I scored
higher than you on that stupid exam?

No.

Hey, detective O'Hara!

Your stolen refrigeration truck
from the seafood warehouse, that's a

10-8-51,
right?

- Yes.
- No, hold on.

That truck is a commercial vehicle,
so technically it's a 15-250.

Excuse me, detective. He was asking me.

Now, if that vehicle ends up
in a chop shop, it's a 10-8-03.

Of course if there's reckless
driving involved, it's a 23-00-1.

Watch out for the illegal transportation

of hazardous
materials. 25-00-1.

Okay, that's enough.

I gotta go get some paper anyway.

- You know what?
- What?

I have worked hard.

I have done everything
asked of me. I am a good cop,

and I'm not going to stand here
and apologize for my good score.

So you are just gonna
have to get over it.

- Yeah. I can't do that.
- Well, then now what?

Your truck. Whoever solves that
case is the better detective.

Solve your own cases.
It's a refrigeration truck.

It's practically a victimless crime.

I guess you just don't count the people
who aren't gonna get their lobster

and sand dabs as victims.

I'm surprised the Miami PD didn't
fail you for lack of compassion.

Gus, what's wrong with me?

What is it that makes all
the guys go crazy on me?

Jann was an idiot for giving you up.

You're so sweet.

Sweet.

Sweet Gus.

Yeah, he's pretty sweet all right.

His head is like a
chocolate-covered honeydew.

Now, would anyone like
to talk about "Jan?"

It's Jann, with a "J".

Shawn is right. We should do
that. So this is all that I have.

I have some pictures of us together.
And a note that he wrote me.

And a lipstick from him.

Do you have any more pictures?

No.

Shawn.

Shouldn't you maybe go
talk with Mira's parents?

- I'll find you when we're finished.
- I haven't finished my...

- It's fine. I'll finish it.
- You don't even know how to work with Cork!

Mrs. Gaffney.

Hello.

- My name is Shawn Spencer.
- Oh, I know who you are.

You're the psychic
detective helping Mira.

You know, I've always been
fascinated by people with "the gift."

Uh, you're talking about
this? Well, that takes work.

I'd like to ask you a
question about "Jan."

Jann?

I wouldn't know the
first thing about him.

I see.

Because you haven't met him?

Very good.

This is our private wine
and alcohol collection.

Oh, I see.

I have a private room for all of my hello
kitty shot glasses and wild animal scat.

I have many interests.

Well, only a privileged
few are allowed down here.

The wine in this room
is worth over $1 million.

We've been collecting it for
years from all over the world.

Would you like a glass?

Actually, I prefer my wine in a box.

I've often heard that's
the best way to savor wine.

Just skip over the taste buds
and go right to the gullet.

I swear, if I have to deal with another
tourist today, my head is going to explode.

And David doesn't like me
drinking in front of the guests.

So, uh, how did you
manage to never meet Jan?

We tried to. Several times.

Take a sip before I finish the bottle.

That's... That's disgusting.

That's a $30,000 bottle
of spanish sherry.

It's good.

You know, Shawn

I have very fine taste,

and I like my wine like I like my men...

White and hairy.

That doesn't make any sense.

None what so ever.

But I can see where
Mira gets her spunkiness.

Phyllis, some of our guests are
gonna... What's going on here?

I was just explaing our
frustration over never meeting Jann.

Yeah, that guy.

Yeah, every time we made plans, he
would change them at the last second

with that same lame excuse
about having to work overseas.

I cannot believe that I shut
down my winery for this wedding.

I should have known better.

Mira's choices in men
have always been suspect.

Including that Guster.

And his supposedly psychic friend.

Now if you'll excuse us?

Yes, of course.

You have to finish packing your wine.

You're moving into your
winery in Napa on friday,

and your amazing collection will
finally be on display for all to see.

- Hey, how'd you know that...
- Don't be intimidated, sir.

I'm just a man.

Oh, god.

- Brace yourself, Jan doesn't actually exist.
- What?

Fact, there is no
record of a Jan Anglund,

buyer of fine wines and food
on the internet anywhere.

I did find a Jeff Anglund.

He's an albino with a website
dedicated to short circuit.

- You put us on the email list?
- That's a given.

Nice.

Oh, so she was lying?

Or she really is checking
into the nutcracker suite.

Hear me, Mira made Jan up.

She made him up?

What is...

Clozapine?

It's an anti-anxiety drug. It's
also used to treat psychosis.

Bingo.

Mira had a prescription to clozapine, but
the refill date was from way back when,

- and she had a bunch of pills left.
- So she was off her meds.

And off her rocker. Even
more so than her mother.

What?

Let's just say I know where
Mira gets her freaky side.

I can't believe this.

I was feeling bad for Mira.

I even started to...

Oh, my gosh! Shawn, she did all this
to get me back. I fell for it again.

But wait, there's more.

The pictures.

I sense something is very, very, very
wrong about these photos, very wrong indeed.

Jan Anglund doesn't exist.

- Thank you and good night.
- Wait, wait, wait a minute!

Jan... Jann is real. Why
would I make any of this up?

To trick me into falling for you again.

I can't believe you'd go through
all of this just to get me back.

How sure are you about this theory?

Crystal.

That doesn't really
work. Very, very sure.

Then how do you explain him?

- Jann!
- Mira, honey, I'm so sorry.

I'm gonna grab a clark bar
from the vending machine.

Uh, anyone else want
anything? Chief? Jules?

Gus, you're good?

Okay. Honey. I looked for you at the
winery, but they said you were here.

Where were you?

- You didn't get my message?
- What message?

At the hotel desk.

Look, I got a call to close this deal
with these venture capitalists in Portugal.

It was for a very important client,
and I thought I could get back in time.

- Venture capitalists, really?
- I'm so sorry.

I never should have gone.
I missed our big day.

I'm just glad you're okay.

Why don't we talk about this back at the
winery and spend some time getting to know you.

Yeah.

- Just give me one second.
- All right.

You... both.

I don't even know what to say to you.

How could you be so cruel?

Doesn't exist, huh? That's great.

Hey, should I put out an imaginary
APB for him on my invisible radio?

- I have a case to work.
- So do I.

Damn it, Shawn.

You made me look like
a fool in front of Mira.

Dude, you know deep, deep down that
there is something weird going on here.

With Mira.

With Jan suddenly
appearing out of nowhere.

I'm gonna prove it to you. I'm gonna
show you that something's going on.

No. No more, Shawn. Stop
it. I'm serious about this.

Fine.

For you, I'll stop.

Thank you.

What are you doing here?

Well, I was hoping to
speak with Jan for a minute.

- Jann.
- I won't call him that.

Yeah, he's off playing
golf with my father.

Ah, sweet.

- Is that it? 'cause I'm busy.
- Actually, there is one more thing.

Just between you and me, why'd you
fake those pictures of you and Jan?

I may have been wrong about a couple of things,
but I know for a fact that those pictures are fakes.

Jan had a shaving cut in the same place
on his neck in each one of these pictures

even though they were taken
at different times of the year.

It's Gus' fault. Really. Ever since
what happened between he and I,

my parents have been skeptical
of every guy I've been with.

Andy, Amir, Guru Anupam,
Gay Andy, Anthony...

Does gay Andy know you call him that?

He gave himself that name. Look, Jann and
I had only been together for a few weeks

when we decided to get married, and I know that's
crazy, but I just believe in all or nothing.

You know, doing what feels right.
Are you following me, Shawn?

What, are you kidding me? I spent an entire
season with an interpretive dance group in Buffalo.

But, see, my parents were against
this thing from the whole beginning.

So Jann photoshopped some pictures to
make it look like we had been together

- for longer than we had, and it worked.
- Wait a second.

You're saying the
pictures were Jan's idea?

No, Jann.

And yeah, he's the one
with the super-fast printer.

I gotta get that.

That's coming from the room next door.

Mira, Mira, Mira!

I said I was sorry about
what happened with Mira.

I am trying to make it up to you here.

Come on, man, we haven't played golf
in forever. This is gonna be fun.

Plus, I promise to keep my caddy
shack references to a minimum.

Now, I've heard this club is restricted,
so, don't tell 'em you're jewish.

- Shawn.
- I didn't say I wouldn't make any.

What are you doing? The
lady's tee's up there.

Dude!

You know what would be more fun?

Starting on the back nine.

Why can't we just start from here?

I can par this hole with this putt.

Yes, yes, yes.

- Great shot. Let's go.
- Shawn!

Shawn, get back here before I
add two strokes to your score!

What's the matter with you?

Is this the real reason you
brought me golfing? To follow Jann?

I told you to drop it. He's
back. There's no more case.

Dude, you're wrong. Jan is the case.

- He's the key.
- You're losing it.

Gus. Gus!

That's the PI from the batting cages.

Even you have to admit
this is getting weird.

Act natural.

Hey, what are you guys doing here?

What's up?

Just playing a little golf.

Keeping an eye out for suspicious
meetings between shady people.

What were you and Mace
Rhoden arguing about?

That was nothing.

You know, I was the guy who hired him. I
was late paying, so he was kind of upset.

Maybe Mira didn't tell you,
but I'm a psychic, yeah.

And right now the spirits are screaming
something in my head over and over and over again.

They're saying, "so se
prometer usar as penas."

- I don't understand.
- It's Portuguese for

"only if you promise to keep
your feathered headdress on."

How can you possibly do business in Portugal
and not speak a word of the language?

- Why did you really Miss the wedding?
- Okay,

- I wasn't in Europe.
- Yes!

Look, the truth is, I was
in another relationship.

I was in a bad situation. I had to end
it before I could get married to Mira.

- You were cheating on Mira?
- No, all right?

No. Not exactly, okay? It
started before we even met.

And I promise you, it's over now.

I know that I haven't
always been a good guy.

But being with Mira, you
know, it's changed me.

I realize now that she's the only
thing in my life that matters.

And you may not believe me, but that
is the truest thing I have ever said.

Look, I'd better get back before
Mira's dad despises me even more.

Shawn...

I've been there before
when it comes to Mira.

- He's telling the truth.
- Yeah, but he's definitely lying.

- How can he be doing both?
- Trust me.

As someone who has occasionally dealt with
half-truths, Jan Brady is not telling us everything.

He's my informant. I'll
get the information we need.

Carlton, this is my case.

And besides, your tough-guy interrogation
technique, it's not gonna work.

Oh, and you think sweet and gentle's
gonna get info from a guy like this?

Please. All I need is 30
seconds. You could time me.

Fine, I'll play that game.
And I will beat you at it.

- Fine.
- McNab!

We're commandeering your watch.

- You're commandeering my...
- Watch.

Okay.

Now watch... how I break this guy.

It's all in the eyes.

- All right. You little son of a...
- Time!

- What? I just got started.
- They're your rules.

Crap.

- Hey.
- Hi.

You look hungry.

Kinda. Thanks.

So...

what can you tell me about a refrigeration
truck that was stolen a few days ago?

Refrigeration truck?

Oh, come on.

All I need's a name, Rusty.

I know about pretty much every
car boosted in Santa Barbara,

but nothing as pointless as
stealing a refrigerator truck.

Honest.

Time!

All right, cut the crap, Rusty. We both
know that you are holding out on me.

- I was eating that candy bar.
- Well, the candy police aren't here today.

It's just me, and I got at least 12
different charges I could pin on you.

So you better start giving
me some good information.

I don't know.

Look, there's only two reasons
why anybody steals a car.

To sell it or to use it.

Since nobody's come down to my shop
to sell me your precious little truck,

they need it for something.

Time!

- Don't you dare tell her a thing.
- Oh, that's great detective work.

Probably why you scored a whole
point lower than me on the exam.

Sorry to interrupt, but the chief
needs you for an important case.

- They took my clark bar.
- They took my watch.

- What's going on?
- It's about Mira's fiance.

I knew it. The guy's a crook.

All right!

Playtime's over, Jan!

I've had a bad psychic vibe
about you from the beginning.

Why don't you go ahead and tell
us what you've really been up to?

Whenever you're ready, Jan.

Jan?

Let's do a loop.

I knew Jann was bad news.

Wow, Gus, you were so right.
Why didn't I listen to you?

We need to find out who killed him.

That's a good idea.

Dude, I have a theory.

I don't think Jan and Mace
were just arguing about money.

- What else were they arguing about?
- I don't know yet.

But I want to talk to
Lassie and Jules. Let's go.

Oh, yeah, um, I'm not gonna be able
to make it. I'am go by the winery.

Mira called. She was
wondering if I would come by.

- Gus.
- I'll be fine, Shawn.

I just wanna be there
for her as a friend.

- All right.
- Cool.

Oh, good. You're all here.

I'm having a psychic vision about Jan, and I
have a theory about who may have killed him.

Let's just take a
step back, Mr. Spencer.

I just got the fingerprint results
from the refrigerator truck case.

Do you wanna take turns with this?

Take turns? What's going on here?

O'Hara and I have a little
competition... excuse me.

Competition?

It is not a competition.

Lassiter is just being a child
about his detective exam score.

Wait, the DET? I took
that when I was 15.

I got 100.

- I'm sorry. You said you got a perfect score?
- Yeah.

- And you were 15?
- Yeah.

Why? What did you guys get?

You know, it's probably changed a lot
since then. You really can't compare it.

Apples and oranges.

He cheated on me, and then he lied to me
about missing the wedding, and now he's dead.

- I know exactly how you feel.
- Really?

- Well... no.
- I always knew that

there was something wrong with Jann. From the
very beginning, there was a little voice inside me

that said it was all wrong, but I
didn't listen 'cause he had andy's laugh

and gay Andy's sense of
style, and your heart.

At least that's what I thought.

- What was that?
- I don't know, but my parents are gone

and the vineyard's closed.

Somebody's been in here.

Yeah, I think maybe we
should call the police.

Good idea.

Officer McNab, you were saying?

Uh, yeah, the lab matched one of the prints
from the gold lighter that was dropped when

the truck was stolen to a known convict named
Marcus Ridley, a. k. a. Mike Ray, a. k. a...

My eyes! It's burning! It's stinging!

Stuff that old women
carry in their purses!

- Velamints?
- No, it's more of an aerosol.

- Binaca!
- It's not a breath freshener!

- Mace!
- Yes.

Mace Rhoden. That's right.

- Was the truck yellow?
- Well, more like a mustard, but yeah.

Oh, I'm getting another vision.
Two, two, two visions in one.

It's Gus and the truck
in the same place.

Gus is in danger.

We have to save Gus!

Come on!

All right, I left Mr. And Mrs. Gaffney a
message, but Gus isn't picking up at all.

- Someone give me a gun.
- No.

- What exactly is going on?
- Okay, okay,

remember when I said that Jan Anglund
didn't exist? Well, technically I was right.

You know what? Forget
that. I was totally right.

He's not Jan Anglund. He's a
con man working with Mace Rhoden,

the guy who stole your
mustard refrigerator truck.

Keep talking.

Well, a few months ago, they
started a long con on Mira Gaffney.

The plan was for Jan to romance Mira and
marry her on the beach in Santa Barbara.

But Mira's parents
asked too many questions.

So Jan doctored the photos to
convince them to have the wedding.

See, my parents were against this thing
from the beginning, so Jann photoshopped some

pictures to make it look like we've been
together for longer than we had, and it worked.

The wedding was merely a cover, so that Mira's
father would shut down the winery for a day.

Jan intended to leave Mira at the
altar, while Mace broke into David

Gaffney's cellar to steal his
priceless wine collection and skip town.

But there was no robbery at the winery.
And Jan didn't skip town. He came back.

- He had a change of heart.
- Oh, don't...

There's something about Mira. Jan was
telling the truth and lying at the same time.

The truth is, I was in another
relationship. I was in a bad situation.

I had to end it before
I could marry Mira.

His other relationship
was with his partner Mace.

He ended it because he actually fell in love
with Mira and couldn't go through with the plan.

That's why they argued at the golf
course. And that's why Mace killed him.

- But why is Guster in trouble?
- Because it's thursday night, Lassie.

The Gaffneys are moving their most
expensive bottles of wine to Napa tomorrow.

Meaning that Mace is stealing them
right now! Somebody give me a gun!

- No.
- Then drive faster!

That's my best friend in there!

Good! You got my message.

Yeah, we looked. We
can't find 'em anywhere.

The wine cellar. Gus!

Gus!

Don't shoot! Everything's okay.

- Mira?
- Mom!

What is going on here? What
have you gotten her into?

Gus! Don't speak.

I can tell you precisely
what happened here, sir.

Gus and Mira discovered, uh,
Mace Rhoden robbing the cellar.

He pulled a gun.

He tied them up.

And Gus assessed the situation and
devised the following brilliant plan.

He finessed them loose. He told Mira
to perform her dragon-headed bar trick

that made him fall for her in the
first place, triggering the sprinklers.

They wrestled over the gun.

Mira fainted.

And we walked in just
as Gus DTD'd the bad guy.

Well done, Guster. Well done.

- Thank you, sir.
- Very impressive.

Yeah, very quick thinking.

I was just doing what
anyone would have done.

Honey, let's get you out of here.

- But I don't remem...
- Darling, come here.

Come on, sweetie.

Let's go.

Yeah, it's time to go.

God, he's all wet.

- Dude, that's not how it happened.
- I know.

Mace's cigarette triggered the
sprinklers, and he slipped and fell?

And then I may have knocked
Mira over as I ran away.

- Let's keep that last part to ourselves.
- You bet.

You guys, it's been such a crazy week.

But thanks to you both,
I'm gonna get through it.

So thank you.

Oh, oh, Shawn, Gus and me are gonna
go rock climbing in Rattlesnake canyon.

And then I'm gonna teach him how
to hang glide off Cathedral Peak.

And it's gonna be so
amazing. Do you wanna come?

You know what, Mira?

We just got a call from a prospective
client. Something about a ghost in a ballroom.

We should probably go work
on that. Is that okay, Mira?

Oh, of course. I totally
understand. You guys do amazing work.

But I just wanna see
you both before I leave.

Mira's moving to Greenland
to save polar bears.

Of course you are.

- Do you wanna come visit for Christmas?
- Gus is coming for Christmas.

- I am?
- Yeah, remember? We talked about this, silly.

Think about it. Bye.

Thanks again, guys.

Dude, thank you for that.

And thank you for putting up with
me throughout this whole thing.

- I know I was a little...
- Whipped.

- Gay?
- No.

- Annoying?
- Well, I was gonna say love struck

but, sure, fine.

And once again, I just
wanna say for the record,

I'm sorry I never told
you about being married.

I understand.

Now I really understand.

Besides, I've been feeling
a little guilty myself.

- About what?
- About not telling you that I too was married.

What? You were not
married, Shawn. Please.

This is a fake, right?

I know this is fake.
You photoshopped this.

Shawn, get back here! You trying to
tell me you went skydiving with a rabbi?

Shawn!

Sync: Indru for Freshon.TV