Psych (2006–2014): Season 1, Episode 3 - Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Piece - full transcript

Attorney general Maxwell demands a discrete investigation into the theft from a hotel safe of his family's heirloom ring just before his son Dylan's wedding with possible gold-digger Bethany Cadman. Shawn can't resist volunteering his services, accepted by the couple, not Carlton Lassiter, yet his suite is invaded as base for an inquest Gus is suckered into because of the state-of-the-art safe. Shawn discovers a missing hotel executive's bloodily murdered corps and brilliantly works trough wedding party suspects while joining bachelor - and hen parties.

Are you wondering how healthy the food you are eating is? Check it -
Hey, Shawn, what in the world do you think you're doing?
Hide and seek. I don't think so.
But you said we could. Not like that.
That's how you play.
Not in my house. Shawn, you can't tail a suspect like that.
Look how loud you are. Your perp is gonna hear you coming from every turn.
Those things smack every time you take a step.
Now, if you're gonna wear them when you compete, you gotta keep...
(WHISPERING) On the balls of your feet. Balls of your feet.
And you take deliberate steps.
You don't know where he is.
He shouldn't get to know where you are.
He's invisible, you're invisible.
Now, you've leveled the playing field. Can I go now?
No. You're going to learn to do the little things right.
For instance,
when you peer around a corner,
I want you to stay down low 'cause, you see,
they're expecting you up here at eye level.
When you walk down a hall,
check the grains of the carpet. We just vacuumed, right?
And never, ever again do I ever want to hear you slam a door
when you can pull it closed. But we're just playing.
Well, play right, Shawn, or don't play at all.
(WHISPERING) he's not in here.
Carlton: I don't need to tell you how vital it is
that we maintain the utmost secrecy on this heist.
The attorney general does not want his son's wedding disrupted
any more than it's already been.
How will we explain our presence to the press?
We don't. Just let them stew.
Well, that's one approach.
But, if I may suggest, I once wrote a paper regarding press releases and such and...
sorry, your idea sounds great.
Get the board.
What are you doing? Dude, I'm onto something big.
Tailing cops? In a police station?
Some monumentally expensive ring just got stolen.
I'm gonna get us on the case.
We just got a case five minutes ago.
Yeah, a lame one. Stolen computers from a high school.
Come on, like, you were falling asleep during that meeting.
This is an heirloom. It's worth $5 million,
lifted from the hotel where they're having the wedding. Wedding's on Saturday.
(EXCLAIMS) There's an open bar.
Dude, we're so there. Are we looking at the same thing?
I told you to wait in my office. I had a premonition.
Something sparkly. Just over five karats,
perfect clarity, slight inclusion.
Is this ringing any bells for you?
Solve the case I gave you. Then we'll talk.
In the meantime, I have a lot of work to complete.
It's the secretary.
Pardon? The secretary. The secretary did it.
Now, what can you tell me about the ring I'm envisioning?
But you barely even looked at this folder.
It's in the papers. Where?
The signatures, it's in her handwriting.
Look, she's faking her own signature, and later there's evidence that it's...
I feel it in the ink.
Very bad vibes.
Strong squidish vibes.
We'll check it out. Until then, I trust you can find the door.
But what about the ring? Not until this one is done.
Hey, let me gather some information, all right? Make a little headway.
Then i'll have a psychic episode that blows the ears right off their skulls.
Shawn, I'm in meetings all day.
I barely had time to come down for this. We're doing what the chief says. Period.
Shawn: So sorry to have kept you waiting.
I am Shawn Spencer, chief psychic here at the department.
Thank you so much for helping. This whole thing has been devastating.
My hands are still shaking.
You're doing fine. Okay, I only have a second.
I'll need you to tell me everything I have to know about this case
as quickly as humanly possible, okay?
What about this guy? What's going on with the best man?
I don't know, he's not answering his phone or his door.
Dylan: This day has just been completely unreal.
Guys, it's going to be fine.
You're in good hands. I have never failed a case.
I know who you are. I read about you in the paper.
You did?
You're the sister of the groom.
And the maid of honor.
And the wedding planner? Correct.
That is so many hats. You should see my closet.
I am hoping to.
But not until I find this ring.
Well, the wedding's tomorrow. How fast are you?
That depends entirely on how much cooperation I receive.
Why don't you come to the wedding?
Yeah. No, no, I couldn't possibly impose on you. No.
Please, you're saving us here.
You find this ring, we'd owe you everything.
What in the hell is going on here?
I just dropped by to say hello.
Guys, this is head detective carlton Lassister and his lovely new partner, Juliet.
His last one turned out to be his girlfriend, so she was transferred.
I'm not sure if that was the only reason. I'll let you decide for yourselves.
Shall we? Sure.
If this is some sort of hazing ritual, where we're gonna end up naked in a river somewhere,
i'll need to arrange for a ride home.
Listen to me, Spencer.
The department's reputation is on the line with this one.
If I catch you anywhere near this case, I will throw every book I can find at you.
What if you find the bible? You going to throw that, too?
Seems a little sacrilegious to me, don't you think?
♪ ♪ I know, you know that I'm not telling the truth ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ I know, you know they just don't have any proof ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ Embrace the deception learn how to bend ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end ♪ ♪
Burton guster, central coast pharmaceuticals.
Shawn: Dude, I got a suspect...
i'll call you back later, Shawn.
No, no, you can't. I left my cell phone in your car yesterday,
along with a tuna sandwich.
I seriously hope you found that.
Later this afternoon, Shawn.
No, no, Gus, this happens now. The wedding is tomorrow.
Is he coming?
Not yet. But we're getting closer.
Thanks, stabber.
Mandatory briefing. Magnolia room. 15 minutes.
Excuse us, please. Attorney general maxwell.
Detective, I trust we're making progress.
Carlton: I am right on schedule, sir.
I've booked myself a suite to use as a command center.
Maxwell: Why?
I'll stay the night if I have to. Keep an eye on things.
The city's not paying for that, is it?
That ring has been in my family for 200 years.
My mother agonized over the decision to give it to my son.
I'm not letting it get away now.
Sir, we are checking every person who came through that door.
Every employee. Every guest.
Nobody checks out of this hotel
until we're just short of going through every piece of their luggage.
Way ahead of you, sir. No, you're not.
Can I help you, sir?
I'm just
For what? For what?
Lyme disease. Lyme disease?
Lyme disease, rickets, avitaminosis, legionnaire's, bubonic. You name it.
I want you to listen to something.
Do you hear that? Mmm-hmm.
We have spores in the wall.
Spores? You know where else they are?
In the planter. You know where else? Everywhere in the entire hotel.
Who called you? Mike?
Mike? Is this a big joke to you?
I don't answer to mike. Have you seen mike lately? Mike can kiss my ass.
I was called in by the state inspector himself.
Are you at all aware how dangerous this is? Hell, yes, I am!
Good. I'm glad.
I need access to this whole place, elevator shafts, air vents,
the safe room, obviously.
The safe room is a crime scene.
This eucalyptus will be dead by lunch.
The safe room will be a triage unit if I don't get those spores out of there.
Understood. Can we let the cops finish up in there first?
Tell them to hurry.
Oh, man.
Thirteen minutes after midnight, members of the wedding party
enter the safe room, placing the ring into a safety deposit box,
which was slid into the safe and closed for the night.
No sensors indicate that either the safe door
or the lock box was opened again until the following morning.
Please note, he has activated the time lock, which prevents the safe from opening.
No one walks into that room again until the following morning,
when the ring is discovered missing.
So it definitely didn't disappear during the night?
Or so they would like you to think.
However, if you look closely, there are nine glitches on this tape.
I'm sorry, glitches?
Seams, static bursts in the image.
Someone could have tapped in an alternate video feed of this room while it was empty.
Or, more likely, as I believe,
someone built a scale replica of this room.
Who laughed?
If somebody disagrees with my theory, I'd like to know.
It does seem very elaborate.
And just a bit far-fetched.
Are you a detective? Why are you here?
Buzz: You asked for all of us to come.
Oh, well, officer, since you're such an expert on fetching,
why don't you fetch me a cup of coffee?
Moving on.
All the employee alibis check out. Except this one.
Dietrich mannheim.
Currently the facilities manager.
You may remember him from the security video.
He was in the room when the ring was placed into the safety deposit box.
During questioning, he was nervous, evasive,
and contradicted himself more than once.
His work computer history reveals that he recently visited websites
for boats and expensive cars, and he failed to show up for work.
Is this your only lead?
His responses to my interrogation were hostile at best.
Clarify "hostile".
Use my tone now as a guide.
Detective O'Hara, all alone?
Well, not anymore, apparently.
Work troubles?
I'm sensing work troubles.
Here, let me read your palm.
How about just one finger?
Come, now, let me see if I can be helpful.
Why are you here?
The maxwell wedding.
Honestly. I was invited.
By whom?
Beth. Bethany. The bride.
Little baby b. The b sting. Love her.
God, dylan is so lucky to have her.
She grounds him in ways that he needed grounding, don't you think?
She's a good sport.
Air supply, really?
Kidding. Just kidding. Relax.
This is work-related.
You thought this place would be different,
but nobody respects your opinions.
They all think you're too young?
You know, I think you and I could help each other.
And how would that be?
Oh, I know things. Things about rings.
Oh. I thought you were here for a wedding.
I am... ish.
You first.
(STAMMERING) I just got a message for you, mr. Guster, and,
well, I'm afraid it's about your cat.
My cat?
The poor thing is in the animal hospital. They think her leg is broken.
I'll get down there later.
You're not going?
I'm very busy.
But your cat needs you for moral support. The vet said it could be the difference.
You have to go.
Mr. Guster, I know that you're in shock.
Don't do anything you're going to regret forever.
I don't even... he's not going?
So, now I have a cat?
An orange tabby. Last Christmas, you made her a tiny Santa hat. It was adorable.
Fantastic. I can't even have a make-believe boy cat.
Gus, a boy cat wouldn't serve my purposes nearly as well.
The next time I need you, pickles is having kittens.
Pickles? Mrs.. Pickles is her full name.
Though, I'm not actually sure cats can marry outside of Boston.
Yeah, well, in a related issue,
I'm blocking your number on all the phones in the office.
If you think that will work, I think it's endearing.
In the meantime, aren't you the least bit curious
about who was there when they put the ring in the hotel safe?
Wait a minute.
This is a safecracking case?
Did I forget to mention that?
What kind of safe?
The hydra 700.
The 700 is out?
That's impossible, nobody could crack that.
I haven't even told you about the wall sensors.
Can we be done by 3:00?
The safe room, right behind that door.
What is all this? I thought this was a safe job.
Oh, Lassister has this insane idea that this in an elaborate heist, right?
Like on par with Ocean's Eleven, or Thomas Crown,
or... oh, the one where they kill Donald Sutherland
in the first ten minutes, remake...
mr. Spencer, mr. Guster, what a surprise.
Chief. Looking good. You're probably wondering...
I sent an officer down to the high school to take a look at your secretary suspect.
She cracked. He didn't even get the first question out.
'Cause I envisioned that being harder.
Yet I don't recall asking you to come down here to the de la cruz.
Well, we have reason to believe
this case goes in a completely different direction.
Let me be perfectly clear.
I didn't see you and we didn't talk.
Call me if you have something.
I love her. Yeah.
He knows you?
I had to lay some groundwork. He doesn't believe in psychics. This is plan b.
Chief inspector Shawn, how are you?
(SHUSHING) I'm undercover.
Not even the American police know I'm in on this.
(STAMMERING) I'm sorry. I blew it again, didn't i?
And after you brought me into your confidence.
Bobby, it's fine. Believe me.
These other Interpol guys are very appreciative of what you're doing here.
(RULE BRITANNIA PLAYING) How long will you need?
Just as discussed, five minutes, tops.
You're my man.
That's right. Missing ring division.
I believe I was recruited out of North Africa when I was 15.
You could at least use a British accent.
(IN BRITISH ACCENT) oh, please, Gus, I started with a British accent,
and then seamlessly slipped into my fake American one.
Bobby gave me some pointers.
Apparently you Americans say "howdy" a lot.
What are you doing?
List. List. I made a list of suspects after attending Lassiter's briefing.
He let you in his briefing?
(LAUGHS) he does when you're in the airshaft.
All your suspects are in the wedding party?
Look, the only ones who knew they put that ring in the safe
were at the rehearsal dinner.
So, it was an inside job? Looking like it.
Gus: You're making keys?
Gus, how else do you expect me to get in the rooms?
Shawn, you can't do that.
Of course I can, I worked at the Hampton inn
for that three-day weekend in Austin when we were 19.
I know you remember that. Gus, this is so easy.
Try making a key.
Dude, I rule.
Nope. Innocent. Let's move.
What are you talking about? We haven't even stepped foot in there.
Gus, do you need the remedial course, really?
Uncle Leo left his wallet on the table.
Criminals are sneaky, jaded, suspicious people.
They're smart and defensive.
This guy has a reason to be trusting.
Can we go now?
Guys, hey, your door was open.
Oh, it was?
Yes, and I was worried that something horrible had happened. You're okay?
Yeah, yeah.
I told you we didn't have to come in here. They're fine.
Everybody's fine. This is my associate, Gus.
Just call him peter panic.
How are you doing?
So, you're a psychic, too?
Well... Gus here is a safe expert.
Yes, he subscribes to the safecracker,
a safecracking comic book.
It's an online magazine. And it's a trade publication.
Excuse me for saying so, but how exactly do you figure into this legal family?
I started my criminal law degree.
Then I came to my senses, went to Europe, painted, slept, ate, sank a boat.
Disappointed? Besotted.
We'd like to speak to the best man, if possible.
So would we.
Any ideas where he is?
We haven't seen him since the night of the sixth.
Which is the night the ring disappeared.
The florist quit.
So, after we dropped the ring off at the safe,
we had to wrap bouquets all night in our suite.
Everybody except jack. Do you think he's a suspect?
No, we just think he's lazy.
Dylan: Hey, dad, this is Shawn Spencer.
He's the psychic I told you about.
I know. Let's talk.
Son, I'm very comfortable with the current direction of the investigation.
So, let's let the real police department do their job.
Sir, believe me, I am only here to help.
In fact, I was actually hoping to discuss...
I'm glad you understand.
The guy shook my hand like I stole something.
You see? That's why I can't do this job alone.
Wow. That is about as orange as you can get.
Which suspect's room is this? Lassiter's.
The head detective? He has his own room?
Perhaps paid for by the city.
No. No. This is going too far. We're not staying.
Gus, we need these witness statements.
It's not exactly like we're being overwhelmed with cooperation here.
Oh, Lacey.
Lacey, you can sink my boat.
Toss me the remote.
Man on tv: It's the bottom of the eighth inning and so far it's been...
what do you got? You got anything good?
I hate to say it, but yeah.
The attorney general has an insurance policy on the ring.
He'll collect a cool $3 million on it as long as it still belongs to him,
which it does only until these two are married.
Well, well, well.
(STAMMERING) I'm supposed to knock.
Forgive me, detective.
Head detective. Sorry.
I was told you wouldn't be here until 6:00 tonight.
That's right. 6:00 tonight. Head detective.
I changed my plan. Please don't tell anyone.
Absolutely, sir.
Thanks. 6:00, huh?
Is there anything I can do for you while I'm here?
As a matter of fact, yes, there is.
We'd like a room service menu delivered immediately.
In Lassiter's photo, there didn't appear to be a mark on that safe.
I don't care how good you are,
you don't crack a hydra without leaving some sort of visible residue.
We need to see that safe.
That's going to be a little difficult.
How close you need to be?
Is there a secret back door through the kitchen?
No, we're gonna take the air vents.
Unfortunately, both my access points are blocked by Santa Barbara's finest.
You think i'm going in there?
You know you want to. Not in this suit.
Gus, do you wanna see the safe or not?
Look, this will be easy. We take this dumbwaiter up to the grate,
pop the screen, crawl right through the shafts.
Three rights and a left. We check our progress through the vents.
Isn't it kind of weird how the body's just shoved in here?
No, what's weird is there's a dead guy in a dumbwaiter
and we're standing here staring at it, waiting for somebody to find us. Let's go!
This is Lassiter's suspect.
Shawn, close the hatch and keep your voice down.
I don't want to explain how we got here.
I just need to see one thing.
You answered it. Hello?
Three days, Shawn.
Dad, hey, gonna have to call you back.
No, no. You were supposed to call me yesterday.
You were supposed to call me the day before. We need to handle this now.
Dad, I'm a little busy right now.
Shawn, just tell me when you are going to come by and pick up the box of trophies?
Really tough to be sure.
Last week you were all gung-ho about getting this stuff back.
I went upstairs, I brought it down for you,
it's sitting in the middle of my kitchen table.
I need my kitchen table, Shawn.
You're right. Can I please call you back, dad?
How about you just give me an answer?
(STAMMERING) tonight. No. Tomorrow.
Tomorrow, wonderful.
Otherwise, I am putting it outside, and that's where it's sitting.
Now how hard was that?
So easy. Anything else?
No, unless, of course, you need something.
Nope. I'm good. Well, actually, wait, I do have one question.
Go ahead.
How long does it take before a dead body starts to smell bad?
(LAUGHING) oh, god.
Did you wipe our fingerprints off?
Of course I did. We were never there.
We need to call the chief soon.
If Dietrich was a part of this, he's not anymore.
Why is it the attorney general has to call me
wondering why some civilian is wandering around grilling his entire family?
Wait a second. The attorney general has your number?
What are you guys, tight?
Give it up. What's the story?
He also told me to keep you out of here by any means necessary,
which opens up an entire world of exciting possibilities for me, personally.
Oh, it's too much! It's too much!
You're not going to shoot him, are you?
I haven't decided.
Oh, my ear. Gus, my ear.
Oh, for the love of mike, you are not gonna escape. Would you just give it up?
Give it up!
Check the dumbwaiter. Open the dumbwaiter. Detective O'Hara!
Oh, my god!
Lassister. Lassister.
Lassy... get over here!
Carlton: Let's go. Get him in the van.
Come on.
You two, out.
No. Don't we get to wait around for the autopsy?
No, we'll call you if we need you.
Sir? Shut this down. Keep it quiet.
Nobody in the wedding party is to know about this. They've been through enough.
Yes, sir.
Maxwell: So, this is it.
Well, that ought to keep them busy for a while.
Can we at least watch the tape in another room besides Lassiter's?
Gus, he's not coming back. Are you sure about that?
Yes, didn't you check his messages?
Are you gonna have some cookies? No.
Do you wanna finish my banana?
I want to leave.
Shawn: Look at the best man. He's smashed.
And look at his hair. It's horrible.
That's it?
We have to watch it again.
It's open.
It's open? What are you doing?
Oh, what am I early?
Big Dyl, you're right on time.
Did I forget to mention that we're hosting the bachelor party?
No, thank you.
He says, "uh-oh. I thought you said you wanted it inside the piñata."
Eat. Eat like men.
You're really mad?
We have less than 12 hours to solve the case,
and you're throwing a kegger in a police officer's room.
Why would I be mad?
Gus, his best man was a total washout, he wasn't gonna plan anything.
We have to dig information out of suspects, and you're wasting time.
Dude. You, wow!
Yes, wow!
Gus here has some questions for you, you flaxen-haired argonaut.
Anything for you two. I love you guys.
I've found that they're particularly forthcoming
with information while in this state.
For example, i've eliminated every suspect here.
Although there is a guy stealing cable
and another refilling his minibar bottles with shampoo,
but I don't think those are gateway crimes to a jewelry heist.
Seriously. Gus, come on, give me a kiss.
No, no, nothing weird, on my cheek.
Get me out of here. I think it's your turn to dig.
Do you know who stole the ring?
And to be honest, I don't care.
I didn't even want the damn thing.
Okay. The night that we announced our engagement, no,
my dad stops dinner right in the middle of my speech.
So, he goes and gets my grandmother's ring.
What am I supposed to say? No?
So, now it's not about us, it's about him again.
I mean, forget that I just chose the person
that I wanna spend the rest of my life with.
I don't wanna seem ungrateful,
but if it were up to me,
I'd sooner just stop looking.
Cross him off.
Dylan, how is dad?
I mean, financially, would you say everything is...
So much for that.
Dylan was the only shot we had in this room, but that's okay.
We have other suspects in this hotel.
At least take a traveler.
Sweet nectar.
Yeah. All right.
Crazy running into you guys here. What are the odds?
You got anything? These girls are not criminals.
It was worth a shot.
You wanna get out of here?
Yes, I do.
So, how are you holding up? I'm good.
My dad brought in all this extra security for some reason.
Can he afford that? What do you mean?
I don't know, it's just... it was a tough year financially for a lot of people...
what are you getting at?
I'm just making random conversation.
(GASPS) Here's my bouquet.
Oh, it's fantastic.
Well, it's sub-par. I was rushed. All that craziness.
I wish I could fix it.
Well, let's just take it out.
It's locked.
They lock up flowers?
I bet you could open it. You have good hands.
Excuse me.
You left me there!
Yes, I did. And you're very welcome.
I just got a lap dance from Patrick Swayze!
What do you mean? Like an impersonator?
No, I think it was actually Patrick Swayze.
I'm going home.
We're done. All we've done is eliminate suspects. We're back where we started.
Oh, Gus, we're fine.
We've got the whole wedding ceremony tomorrow to solve the case.
Oh, oh, okay. So, we can do what an entire police force can't in two hours?
Okay, you're right.
We should totally get there half an hour early.
You are the most beautiful bride in this room.
Oh, thank you.
Does anyone need help?
The bouquets still aren't here.
We might as well not even have the ceremony.
Okay, you, relax. Breathe.
Think happy thoughts like puffy clouds,
mac and cheese, Lou Diamond Phillips.
Look, it worked.
What are you doing? Helping.
No, those bouquets are very specific.
They look identical, ma'am.
It's my wedding, shouldn't I be the one freaking out?
Oh, there'll be plenty of time for that later.
Where is it? Where? Where's my bouquet?
She's really a very nice person under normal circumstances.
Lace? Everything okay up here? You all right?
Yeah. Sorry. I think i'm having sympathy bridezilla. I'm good now.
Emma doesn't wanna wear the flower in her hair.
But these are magic flowers.
Do you want one now?
I don't know what to tell you, sir, but these are the charges.
$1,600 for a junior suite?
With a queen bed?
Well, the room was a small portion.
However, it's all your room charges that drove up your bill.
I was hardly even in the room!
I'm sorry, detective Lassister, but that's what it says here.
This isn't detective Lassister.
I beg your pardon?
Oh, he's a shorter guy. Brown hair.
Suede jacket. Helped him fill the jacuzzi with champagne last night.
Really? If I brought this man here, could you identify him?
Oh, absolutely. In fact, I can tell you where he is.
He's over at the Maxwell wedding.
The chapel is just outside the east lawn.
I'll be right back.
"I, Dylan, take you Bethany."
I, Dylan, take you Bethany.
"To be my wife." To be my wife.
Minister: "confidant of my heart."
Dylan: Confidant of my heart.
"That you will be a faithful friend."
That you will be a faithful friend.
"And a true and loving companion."
And a true and loving companion.
"I give to you my sacred vow."
Excuse me.
I give to you my sacred vow.
I think we should wait until the ceremony's over.
Nice suit. Where'd you get that from?
Gus, don't underestimate me, or my wardrobe.
You might want to remove...
don't pull that off! Don't, don't, don't, don't.
Just slide it...
they're here for you. Not if I solve this case first.
Good plan. You got about five minutes.
I already know who did it.
No, you don't. How is that possible?
Between all that, when you said your girlfriend
just had an aneurysm because she got the wrong bouquet,
you had time to put all that out of your mind and solve the case?
Gus. What?
And now for a moment of silence.
Gus, I seriously do have a guess.
Probability of being right?
I don't know, high sixties.
Close your mouth. But the person's in the room.
(SHUSHING) The thief could potentially escape.
Shouldn't i stop the wedding? No.
Under no circumstances are you allowed to stop this wedding.
If there's any reason why these two should not be wed,
speak now or forever hold your peace.
I have something.
It's not necessarily marriage-related. I hope that's not a problem.
Sir, please.
I know who stole the ring.
You cannot do this, Shawn. This wedding has taken over a year to plan.
What are you doing?
Radioing the chief.
Shawn: I can see it.
Chief Vick? I can feel it.
I can now feel the ring.
It's in this room. It's in the room. It's in this room.
They wouldn't bring a stolen ring to the ceremony, you moron.
They would if they couldn't get to it till today.
Lacey, I'm so sorry.
And believe me when I say, I really, really, really wish it wasn't you.
Are you crazy?
I'm the one who's done all the work.
Yes, you are.
And we're all very impressed, but it was also an excellent cover, wasn't it?
You are crazy, Shawn.
And, by the way, we're officially off for next Friday.
Oh, boy! I can see it now.
Shawn: You're at the dinner table.
They're announcing the engagement.
You're thrilled, of course. You and Bethany have been best friends forever.
Dad... dad has a surprise for the happy couple. What could it be?
Wait a minute.
You didn't know the ring was going to Dylan.
You were always your grandmother's favorite
and you're the oldest girl. That ring should be yours, right?
You were counting on that ring.
It was your future.
I can see you plotting.
I can see you plotting right there at the dinner table.
But dad... dad throws a curve ball.
No, it was a slider.
He's overly cautious because sometimes engagements end.
Not you guys. It's okay.
They're not letting go of the ring until the wedding,
which means you have a very small window within which to grab it.
Does all this have anything to do with why these two shouldn't be married?
No, sir. No. It doesn't at all, actually.
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
Oh, boy!
Of course, you insisted it be used during the rehearsal
so then you had your chance.
While everyone else was fawning over the ring, you made one final adjustment.
It looked like you just straightened it out and put it right back,
but you never did, did you?
No, Lacey,
because you have magic hands,
which I was really looking forward to on Friday.
Everyone was fooled.
Everyone was fooled,
except Dietrich Mannheim,
who hadn't yet discovered how to use this information to his benefit.
This is first-rate fiction, Shawn.
Unfortunately, there's no evidence.
There would have been no evidence if you could have gotten away that night.
But there was a problem.
Yes, you were called away.
The florist.
The florist bailed on you. The bouquets.
You got a last minute batch of materials,
and the bouquets would now have to be crafted by hand.
There was no other time but now.
You looked for a way out, but there was none.
You had a $5 million ring that was about to be discovered missing any minute,
hidden in your palm,
and you were gonna have to pull an all-nighter in a room with eight other people.
You thought you could get back into the cooler later and grab it,
but they kept their flowers locked up.
So, you had to have your specific bouquet, or else.
Lacey, you're not an unreasonable person.
You're just a thief.
Or at least you were a thief,
until Dietrich Mannheim called and told you that he was on to you.
He wanted a piece of that action, too. Or he was going to the police.
You tried to talk him down, but he got rough.
It got ugly.
It was all spinning out of control.
Eventually, they were going to find that body, so you started laying out clues.
You sent the police off in all directions
because you'd grown up hearing all about crime scenes.
I would say that's fortuitous, because you knew just what to leave, didn't you?
I have worked 18 hours a day on this wedding.
I have sacrificed my weekends.
I will not be treated this way.
Then show us your bouquet, Lacey.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. She's running? In those heels, really?
We have to chase her, too?
But we have no evidence except for that ring!
Dude, you're next.
Come on. You're still angry, even after i solved your crime?
Is this the man?
This guy was not in my room?
I've never seen him before.
You got a room?
We should have a party.
Get out of my sight.
(IN BRITISH ACCENT) Thank you, Bobby.
Interpol appreciates both of your efforts.
I love weddings. Don't you?
I didn't exactly think it was appropriate for you to give the toast.
Well, the best man was unprepared. Someone had to step in.
Besides, it was like a practice run for your wedding.
You are not gonna be my best man.
You bet your ass I am.
I've already picked out which song I'm singing at the altar.
You still like Ted Nugent?
Remind me to show you your vows.
They're going to make you cry.
♪ ♪ In between the lines there's a lot of obscurity ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ I'm not inclined to resign to maturity ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ If it's all right then you're all wrong ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ But why bounce around to the same damn song? ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ You'd rather run when you can't crawl ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ I know, you know that I'm not telling the truth ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ I know, you know they just don't have any proof ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ Embrace the deception learn how to bend ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ I know, you know ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ I know, you know ♪ ♪