Pivoting (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - My Friend Died! - full transcript

Sorry,
this gift card is expired.

That's because it belonged to
our dear friend Coleen.

She has sadly...
passed on.

Listen, man,
we're not doing great, okay?

She used to be a doctor.
Now she's bagging groceries.

Whoa.
Number-one chain in the nation.

And this one hasn't had a carb
in about eight weeks

'cause she's trying
to bag her trainer.

I'm doing it for my health.
Jeez.

And I have decided to be
a mother in the afternoons.

So could you just take a little
pity on us and swipe the card?



I pity you.
A lot of us do.

But... still a no.

Okay.

You know what?
You keep the card, Pete.

I'll get our $33 another way.
Okay?

Just gonna...
A little doily burrito.

Well, those are free, anyway,
so...

Oh, hey, hey, hey!
You can't just... A few of these.

A few of these,
and one of these, one of those.

- No, no.
- You poked the bear, Pete.

This is on you.
This is on you. Wow!

Let's get it in there.
No cup left behind.

Wait!

Could you get in trouble
for taking all that stuff?



Is it stealing? No, it's in the gray zone
at best.

Does anyone want a muffin-bite?

- Oh. Carbs.
- I'm good.

Uh-huh.

It's so dry!
Does anybody have water?

Do you want to spit it out?

See you back here tomorrow!

Ow.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

No need to flatter me.
You already got me.

No, it's my right boob.
There's a sharp pain.

I think there's something
really wrong.

Ow.
It's very serious, I think.

Oh, my God.

You don't even care
if I'm dying.

Well, it's hard to take you
seriously when yesterday,

you said your kidneys
"felt weird."
Ow.

The day before that, you had
"odd, patchy skin" on your back.

Oh, and then you said
your tongue was "bumpy."

It's still bumpy.

Henry, my friend died, okay?

It's normal for me
to be a little scared.

But you're healthy.

Go see your doctor
so he can tell you.

Or she.
Or she.

Okay, thank you.
It is a guy, though.

Coleen was healthy.

She went to the doctor.

Eight months later,
she was dead, okay?

She didn't... Hey, she didn't
even have a bumpy tongue.

Alright. Well, let's save
the sexy talk for later.

I gotta go to work.

Okay, maybe we can try again
this afternoon.

I-I probably won't be dying
by then.

I was planning to go
for a run.
Oh, good.

'Cause I'm all of a sudden
very aware of my spleen.

I know you think I'm crazy,
Henry, but my friend died!

If Coleen can get cancer,
anyone can!

Okay!

Andrea! Do you have your soccer
cleats for practice?!

I cleaned the dog poo off
for you!

You're welcome!

Oh!

Hey, there.

Hey. Uh, hope I'm not calling
at a bad time.

Where are my cleats?!

What? No way.
What's up?

Um, well, I... Nora: Mom!

Evan hit my tooth,
and it's loose!

Aww.
Are those your kids?

My... Oh, ki... No.

I mean, I barely... What's up?

Well, I just wanted to see

if maybe you wanted to meet
in the park this afternoon?

But I'm not scheduled for today.

No, no, no, I know.
It's just...

It's such a freakin' beaut out.
I thought it might be fun.

Sure thing.
My day's wide open.

Great. I'll, uh...
I'll text you the details.

Bye.

Alright. You knocked Barry off
the wall in just a week.

And...

congratulations
on Employee of the Month.

Thank you.Oh. Congrats, Sarah.

Nice job.

Oh, hey, Rudy.
Thank you.

I-I'll see you out there.

Look at that, Huddy.

Rudy knows my name now.

I'm not just "noob" anymore.

Hi.
Amy.

Plastic, and I need you
to feel something.

Please don't make me touch
your body again.

You are not dying.
I'm sorry.

Um, no. I really need you
to feel my boob, okay?

I-I think there's a mass.

Just want you to know,
you are ruining boobs for me.

Okay, well, just...
Just get in there.

Just get in there.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, no.

You're already finding it.
See?
Uh-huh.

You can't not feel it.
See?

Amy, I really feel like
Coleen's death is affecting you.

I mean, you're obviously
going through something.

Well, that would hold
a lot more water

if you weren't a doctor
bagging groceries.

Okay. That was low.

It is not a lump.
It's a floating rib.

Ew.
Ew?

What kind of bedside manner
is that?

Oh, my God.
Hi!

Wait,
what are you doing here? Hi.

Are you guys hanging out
without me?

I am working,
and she's dying apparently.

Oh. Okay.

Because now that Coleen's gone,
there's only three of us,

and someone always gets
left out, and I feel left out.

What is happening here?

Since when do you wear jeans
and boots?

You look so nice.

Is this an old-timey
picnic basket?

Matt asked me to meet him
at the park today.

It felt very flirty.

We've never gotten together
outside the gym.

This is major.

Is this really still going on?

You're a cliché.
You know that?

No offense.

Well, offense.

Honestly,
what is the end game here?

I mean, you guys have sex,
he gives you HPV,

and then that spirals
right into cervical cancer,

and then, I mean, poof,
you're dead.

Dan gave me HPV years ago.
I think I'm fine.

Okay. And thank you for shopping
at Fields.

Okay, no, no, no, no, no.Goodbye.

I need to know
where this rib is floating to.

What if this is the reason
I have so many spleen issues?

This is related to... Hey, hello.

Hi.Hi.

Uh, would you guys mind
maybe moving

your sleepover party outside? Mm-hmm.

Rude. Thank you.

Thanks for shopping at Fields.

Nice friends. No, no, I don't...
I don't know them.

Okay.

Oh.

Okay, so I texted Henry to tell
him that I was gonna live,

and this is what
he came back with.

So, he's got this app
that tracks his jogging route.

He's trying to spell the word
"Jets" for the New York Jets.

He's a crazed fan.

But, I mean,
it's impressive, isn't it?

I mean, and...
And really pointless.

Oh, man. The "S" crosses
Sunrise Highway three times.

That has the highest death rate
in the tri-state area.

Between the blindspot and
the drag racing and the curse,

it's a death parade.

Eh. Nah, he's fine.
I think he'll live.

Yeah, you better hope so.

My cousin Tony
dropped dead at 43.Oh, here we go.

Left his wife Lorraine
with three kids.Mm-hmm.

Her life became an endless cycle
of work and childcare.

Every bedtime.
Alone.

Every poopy diaper.
Alone.

Weird puberty stuff?
Alone.

She aged 20 years in one.

You think youlook like
an old mom.

Okay.

Jodie!

Oh, there you are!
Hey!

How about this day, huh?

Freakin' beaut.

What's in the basket?

Well, I just came from a thing,

and I was gonna change
when I got here,

but I guess I just accidentally
picked this up

instead of my workout bag.

And here we are.

Well, right on.
Let's get started, yeah?

Look, we can do this
some other time.

No, no, no, no.
Please, no.

You came all the way here
for a workout.

I'm gonna give you a workout,
okay?

We do kinda got to hurry,

'cause I gotta get through all
you moms before school gets out.

So let's start with some squats.

Yeah? Okay?

One.

It's just... Great.

Okay, you gotta get a little bit
lower than that.

It's good, though.
That's good.

And... There you go.
That's better.

Do you wanna slip the shoes off?

Might help.

I think everything
should probably stay on.

Yeah? You... You sure? Yep.

Hey, everyone.

Guys... Guys have you seen this?

Someone has drawn a phallus
and I want to say testes

on... on my
Employee of the Month picture.

Did... Did some random teen
get back here?

Oh.

Good razz.
Very funny, guys.

Nobody likes a winner. Or a wiener.

You know, we could all
be winners, you know, Rudy?

I mean, we could be doing
so much more here.

I mean, you...

You could be color-coordinating
the cereal boxes!

A-A-And, Mary-Louise,
those baskets could be stacked

so much neater, don't you think?

I mean, all it takes is one
person to make this change.

And I am so happy
that I get to be that for you.

So join me in... in excellence,
won't you?

What are you doing?

Tying my shoes
so I can go for a run.

Have you never seen me do this?

Wait, not the Jets run.
Hell yeah, the Jets run.

J-E-T-S.
You know it, babe.

J-E-T-S.Jets, Jets, Jets!

J-E-T... I know.
Okay, you know what?

You can't go to Sunrise Highway.
Okay?

It is very dangerous
and possibly cursed.

What?
Yeah.

You have to cross it three times
to make the "S."

Four times.
So what?

Henry... I don't want you to die,
okay?

I can't live without
you. That's really sweet.

Donna's cousin Tony died,
left Lorraine with the kids.

She had to raise them
all by herself.

Do you know how old
she looks now?

It's awful.

Oh. Okay.

I'll see you later. No, no. Eh... Mnh-mnh.

You have to listen to me,

and not just because
I'm the alpha here,

but because my friend died,
okay?

So, please?

Okay. Fine.

I won't go for this run,

if you'll stop using
so much fake sugar.

Hmm?
Uh-huh.

I heard it causes cancer,

and I don't want to be alone
with the kids, either.

Fine, fine.
I will stop with my yellows.

I just... Let me just finish

what I stole
from the coffee shop.

It's a long story.

Oh. Let me guess...
You were in the right?

I was.

Wait.

I just refilled my bags.

You know what?

These are going to be on me.

We are gonna fit all of this
into this bag.

That's not gonna work.

I have stuffed intestines back
inside a man's stomach cavity,

so I-I think
I can make this work.

Fiber, and eggs on top.

Oh. It's a little...
It's a little heavy.

Careful. Just give it to me.

Alright. Okay.
Alright.

Oh. Bend your knees.
I used to be a doctor.

Thank you for shopping
at Fields.

If you're out of bags,
maybe you could go

color-coordinate
the cereal box aisle.

I would love to!

28... Don't stop.

29.30.

Boom! Done.

Great job today, Jodie.
Seriously.

You know, you're not like
my other clients

who just take the whole hour
to hit on me.

It's like the opposite
of Me Too.

It's like #TooMe or something.

So gross!

Uh, hey.
Bye!

We haven't done
your post-workout stretch yet!

You know what?
I'm already loose.

I'm just...
I mean, I'm not loose.

You know what I mean.
I just...

Jeez, Jodie.

Jodie!

Jodie!

Hey.
Ah...

You forgot your other purse...

Aah! Ew! Bee!

Whoa, okay. Alright.

Bee!
S-S-Stay calm.

Stay calm, alright?
They don't want to sting you.

They just... Ow!

Oh! It got you! Oh!

Oh, wait.

Bastard.
I can help!

Wait.
I can suck out the stinger.

I've got everything
in this purse.

Oh, man.
Okay.

Got me right in my pec.

Crap, that really hurts.Oh.

Ow.

I'm surprised it could get
its stinger in there.

It's very hard.
Yeah.

Hold still.

Thank you.

Oh, here's... Just...

Oh, you got superhero ones?!

You must be a great mom.

Take all of them.

Sick. Thank you.

Hey.

You forgot
your other purse again.

You want me
to put it in the back?

Yes.
Yeah.

Please.

Pbht.

Okay.
What's the emergency?

Did you get a second opinion
on my floating rib?

I need you to stuff
the comment card box

with negative reviews
about Rudy.

I will get you started.

He doesn't wash his hands
after peeing.

Okay, but are we really supposed
to do that every time?

Every time.Oh.

Oh, my God.

I can smell you
from outer space.

Did you get mugged, or... Ugh.

Guys, guys.

Look at what my co-workers
did to me out of jealousy.

I took a picture of it.

It's such good work.
Look at that. It's not funny, Amy.

Mnh-mnh. They took my bags, too.
I'm being bullied.

Ooh.
So unsanitary.

Okay, screw the comment cards.
I was a bully in high school.

I am so ready to take out
some pent-up aggression

on an essential worker.Great.

You.

Are you the one
that drew the, uh...

The thing on our friend's face?

Oh, sure did.
It was self-modeled.

Why?
Oh.

That type of behavior
is not okay.Mm-hmm.

You need to apologize to Sarah
right now!

Look, I didn't want it
to get to this point,

but she left me no choice.

She gave a motivational speech
in the break room.

I love
her motivational speeches.

They're why I floss every day.

Listen,
we like to slack off here,

and she's upsetting
the chillaxed mood.

Because of her,
the powers that be

think that we can be doing more.

Oh, boy. Okay.
You know what?

This is sounding
all too familiar.

This is sounding like elementary
school all over again.Huh.

We started getting math homework
because of her.

Yeah, and then she got put in
the advanced classes

with all the other dorks.

We get it, Rudy.

We know what
you're going through, buddy.

We got your back.
Thank you.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I am exactly 11 1/2 minutes late
to my shift,

the normal amount of late
to go back to work.

Yeah, true dat.
Okay.

Self model.
Do you know believe that?

Come on.

So, did he cop to it? Yeah.

He copped to you being a narc,
Sarah.

Did you not learn anything
from elementary school?

You think
I want to be like this?

I'd love to be a slacker.
I can't help myself.

Well, you have to try harder
to do less.

Yeah.
I mean, isn't that why

you made this whole
dumb life change?

Well, they hated me
in the ER, too.

I saved too many lives.

Hey.Hmm.

Why are Why are you panting?

Henry?
Did you butt-dial...

Did you butt-dial me
from the Jets run?

He butt-dialed me
from the Jets run.

What's a Jets run? Oh,
it's a deadly run, and...

And he's gonna leave me
with those kids,

and then I'm gonna have
to explain to Luke
what an erection is.

Please don't do that.

Oh, no.
That's what YouTube is for.

Okay, I have to go save him.
Sarah, you have to come with me.

I might need a doctor.

Do you still have paddles
in your car?

I do, but I still have
10 minutes left on my shift.

Okay, then you're definitely
coming with me.

Do you want to be a loser
for the rest of your life?

I-I-I can skip out,
if I... if I want.

I'm totally available. Okay,
can we not do this dance?

Please?
Yes, you're coming.

We're all going.

Okay. I got invited.

- Yeah, go, go, go.
- Yes, yes. Got an invite.

I've got snacks. I'm taking off early.

To be clear, my shift is not
over, but I am leaving!

Have you been letting squatters
live in your car?

What is going on here?

I am a mother in the afternoon,
so just... just back off, okay?

Oh, my God!
Was this coffee brewed in hell?!

Aah! It's so hot! Oh, we got comment cards

that, uh, said
the coffee wasn't hot enough.

Oh. Okay, can someone
please tell me where I'm going?

I had a terrible day.
Please don't make me navigate.

Aw, did your boyfriend fall off
the monkey bars at the park?

He's not my boyfriend.

He just sees me
as another dried-up old mom.

So I'm going in there tomorrow,
and I'm telling him we're done.

Even though we never started.

You know what?
Why don't you just tell him now?

No! Don't...
Don't move that!
Call him.

That's my... Ugh. No, because
I'm gonna do it in person.

We had a very serious relationship
in my head. Why? Just call him.

Okay, do I go north or south?

North!
South! Okay, you know what?

I'm just going
to the deadly "S."

I'm just gonna go straight
to the deadly "S."

Oh, there he is. That's not Henry.

Do you think Henry's short?

Well, he doesn't strike me
as tall,

but maybe it's his personality.

Oh, there is that filthy liar.

Henry!

Henry!

Unbelievable. Get in the car, Henry!

Come on!

Get in the car!
No!

Get in the car, Henry!

No!

Henry!

Oh.

Put it in park! Yep, yep, yep, yep. Oh.

God...

Amy, what the hell?!

Are you trying to kill me?!
You just hit me with the car!

Oh, don't be so dramatic!

I tapped you.
I barely tapped you.

Okay, it was the only way
I could get your attention.

Do you know how dangerous
this run is?

Yeah, I do.
I just got hit by a car.

Oh, my God.
You lied, Henry.

You weren't supposed to go
on this run.

We had a deal.

I gave up the only thing that
I love... artificial sweeteners.

Okay, you're right.
I am so sorry.

Can I get a sip of your
coffee? No, no, no, no, no.

Give me the coffee.

Watch it.

Mm! Mm!

Enjoying that?
A little hot?

I'm so sorry.
There's... There's none left.

Mm.

Yup.
That's disgusting.

I was... I was gonna...
I was gonna give it up tomorrow

so we weren't giving up things
on the same day.

God.

Okay, I've been drinking it
forever, and I'm fine.

Yeah, well,
I've been running forever,

and you're the only person
that's ever hit me.

Oh, my God. You are never
gonna let this go, are you?

My friend died, Henry, okay?
She died.

And it came out of nowhere,

and she's... she's just...
She's dead.

And it could happen
to any of us.

It's gonna happen to all of us.

Come on, Amy.
I know Col's death rattled you.

It rattled me, too.

And I'm really trying
to let you go through

whatever it is
you need to go through.

But come on. This constant
fear's no way to live.

It's not how Col lived.

It's not how I want to live.

Ugh.
She was... She was so happy.

I mean, like, right up until
the day she died, she was happy.

She had hope.

She was so naive.
So... dumb.

You could try that.

I mean, I know how uncomfortable
you are with hope.

But...

Okay.
Alright, alright.

I will try to enjoy my life.

I can't make any promises,
though.

I just... I really don't want
you to go first, though.

Okay. Okay, yeah.

Maybe we can just die together.

I'd kinda like to die alone,
if that's okay.

Guys!

Alright.
Okay.

You have the keys,
it's hot in here,

and Jodie stinks!

Jodie. Hey.

Wow.
You look amazing.

Oh, thanks.

I mean, thank you.

Hey, thank you for saving me,
uh, yesterday.

Yeah, right,
'cause I'm such a mom.

You are. Yeah, I-I love
how nurturing you are.

The way that you leapt
into action when I got stung...

It was the sweetest thing
anyone's ever done for me.

I mean, besides my mom
giving birth to me.

You're so great.

Um, hey, uh, I have some
free time, if you, uh...

If you wanna get in a quickie?

You know,
maybe do the treadmill.

You got some jeans and boots
you can change into?

Ow.
Oh, sorry.

Ow.
Right on that...

Yeah. Right on it... really hard pec.

Oh, wow. Yeah, I feel like you didn't
break up with your trainer.

Signed up
for five more sessions.

That's not what...

Jodie, I feel like you're having
some kind of mental breakdown.

Seriously.
Me?

You almost ran
your husband over.

Twas a tap.

Alright, I gotta get to work.
I'm gonna be late.

Don't be such an on-time dork.

I am Employee of the Month!

You're gonna be a sweaty
Employee of the Month now.

You're gonna smell
like corn chips.

Guys!