Petticoat Junction (1963–1970): Season 1, Episode 4 - Is There a Doctor in the Roundhouse? - full transcript
Norman Curtis, who has fallen in love with life at the Shady Rest, is still staying there for free without Kate yet knowing his true identity. He is even helping Kate and the girls set-up for the Jamboree Hoedown which will be held at the hotel. Both Norman's reputation with Kate and the Jamboree are threatened when Norman, who was given the reigns to operate the train by Charley and Floyd, ends up breaking the throttle. The train can't run without it. A replacement part for a train this old is difficult enough to find, let alone by a supposed company who doesn't care about its operation. Norman decides to come clean about his identity. The problem is no one believes him. In fact, they all believe he's crazy. While everyone else does whatever they can to fix the throttle in time for the Jamboree, Norman, on his own, has to make contact with the outside world to prove that he says who he is by getting the train's throttle fixed the proper way. He is able to make contact with his team of high powered executives of an airline, a telecommunications company and the military, who, when having arrived at the Shady Rest to work on the train, come across as crazy as Norman.
(train whistle blows twice)
♪ Come ride the little train ♪
♪ That is rollin' down the
tracks to the Junction ♪
(bell clanging)
♪ Forget about your cares ♪
♪ It is time to relax
at the Junction ♪
(whistle blows twice)
♪ Lots of curves, you bet ♪
♪ And even more when you get ♪
♪ To the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction ♪
(snare drum plays train rhythm)
♪ There's a little hotel called
the Shady Rest at the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction ♪
♪ It is run by Kate, come and
be her guest at the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction ♪
♪ And that's Uncle Joe,
he's a-movin' kinda slow ♪
♪ At the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction! ♪
(train whistle blows twice)
two and three and four
and five, six, seven, eight.
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight.
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight.
Here, here, what's going on?
We're working on a new finish
for the Jamboree Hoedown, Mom.
Yeah, see how you like it.
GIRLS: ♪ Da-da-da-da-da,
bum-bum. ♪
That's very, very good.
Of course, it would be
better with boys. Uh-huh.
Anything's better with boys.
Yeah, here.
Add these to the decorations.
And get busy.
Where's Uncle Joe?
BETTY JO: In the
dining room, Mom.
Uncle Joe, you promised to
hang that sign out front for us.
Kate, I've only got two
hands and one mouth.
Well, I guess the girls
and I can manage it.
How about a little help
from your hobo friend?
Who?
That no-good moocher
that's taking you for
free room and board.
I presume you're referring
to Mr. Norman Curtis.
I'm referring to Nutty
Norman, the freeloader.
Uncle Joe, Mr. Curtis may be
temporarily financially
embarrassed,
but he is an
ambitious, intelligent,
refined, well-educated
gentleman.
Don't waste all that
hot air, put it in here.
You're going to be
sorry when you find out
where he is right now.
In the kitchen eating
up all the food?
No, sir.
He's gone to Pixley
with Floyd and Charley.
He's got a plan
to attach a flatcar
to the back of the
train, put benches on it
and bring 50 extra
people to our jamboree.
Now where would
he get a flatcar?
He... he says he has
connections with the railroad.
(chuckles)
His only connections
are with a knife and fork.
Well, Floyd and Charley
thought enough of his plan
to take him into
Pixley with them.
In fact, they gave
him the throttle.
That's dangerous. Why?
He might put ketchup
on it and eat it.
He sure looks happy, don't he?
Of course he does.
Poor old hobo...
All of his life he's
been riding the rods,
and now he's at the throttle
of the Hooterville Cannonball.
Hey, Norman. Yeah.
You really think you
can get that flatcar?
Well, I told you fellas,
I got connections
with this railroad.
(phone ringing)
Mr. Curtis' office.
No, I'm sorry, Mr. Curtis
is out of the city
for a few days...
(phone ringing)
Secretary of Labor?
Yes, I'll tell him.
Mr. Curtis' office.
No, I'm sorry. He won't
be able to go to Washington
for the White House
conference. (phone ringing)
Mr. Curtis' office.
No, no, I'm sorry,
he's someplace between
Hooterville and Pixley.
(phone ringing) I don't
know where they are either.
(phones ringing)
Come on, Mom, you can dance it.
One, two, three, four...
(girls laughing)
Now, that's...
Save that for your young fellas.
Uncle Joe and I will
watch from the sidelines.
Well, speak for yourself, Kate.
I can shake a foot with
any of these young bucks.
Come on, Uncle Joe.
Come on.
One, two, three, four...
There's a step you can do.
Look, two more fellas.
Now we all have partners.
Come on, Charley. We're doing
a new dance for the jamboree.
Hold it, hold it, girls.
I'm afraid there ain't
gonna be a jamboree.
How can that be?
There's no way for
the folks to get here.
That fella Curtis has
wrecked the Cannonball.
Wrecked the Cannonball?
What?!
He just as good as wrecked it.
Busted the throttle
right smack off.
Can't run a train
without a throttle.
How'd it happen?
He tried to show off
going up Bleaker's Hill.
Yanked the throttle back so hard
he snapped it right in two.
Pretty much pulled a
rod right out of the boiler.
Yeah, Floyd and I had to pound
it back with a block of wood.
Shut off the steam.
Well, what'd you do, walk all
the way from Bleaker's Hill?
No, we let it roll backwards
and coasted to here.
Well, Kate, what do you think
of your refined,
intelligent Mr. Curtis now?
He's wrecked a train
and ruined our jamboree.
I hope you're satisfied.
Shh. Here he comes.
Now don't just
stand there, Kate,
go get him something to eat.
He's probably hungry
after all he did today.
I don't know what to say.
Take a crack at "good-bye."
Now, Uncle Joe...
Charley, can't the
throttle be fixed?
I'm afraid we'll have
to get a new one.
FLOYD: A new old one.
They ain't made 'em
like that in 50 years.
Might as well face it, Kate...
The Cannonball
can't be fixed in time
to bring the folks
to the jamboree.
Yes, it can.
Now listen to me, everyone...
Quiet, folks, we're gonna
hear some words of wisdom
from our distinguished
hobo guest.
I hadn't intended to
reveal my identity to you,
but now I think I should.
And then you'll know that
I can have the train fixed.
I am Norman P. Curtis...
President of the
C. & F.W. Railroad.
Charley, are you sure
that throttle can't be fixed.
Don't you believe me?
Norman, this is
no time for jokes.
But wait a minute, Kate.
I'll prove it to you.
Anybody got a dime?
Aw, forget it, Norman.
That thing's as
phony as you are.
What?
It's got the same
kind of connections
with the telephone company
you've got with the railroad...
None.
Well, why is it here?
Gives the hotel class.
Which it's going to need
plenty of with you here.
Norman, you're pathetic.
Maybe Lon Harker can fix that.
He's a farmer.
He also does blacksmithing.
If he can mend a plow,
why can't he
forge that together?
How we gonna get up
to his place with no train?
Cut through the woods
to the county road
and hitch a ride.
Let's go, Charley.
It's worth a try.
I just wanted to say,
I'm awful sorry
about Mr. Curtis.
Kind of feel like it's my fault
for inviting him to stay here.
Aw, Kate, don't be
blaming yourself.
It's our fault, too.
We let him drive the train.
Kate, I'm kind of worried
about Floyd and me going off
and leaving you and the
girls and Nutty Norman.
But Uncle Joe's here.
Well, that's what I mean.
Can you handle two of them?
Get out of here, both of you.
Kate, if I can only
get to a telephone,
I guarantee you I can have
that train running again.
Well, the nearest
telephone is in Hooterville.
Isn't there any
way I can get there?
There's a handcar
down by the water tower,
but, uh, that's a mighty
long way to pump.
Well, I was the stroke
on the Yale varsity crew
that beat Harvard,
Princeton and Cornell.
Yeah.
Oh, I liked him so much better
before he started
all that bragging.
What's the matter?
You girls haven't
touched a bite of your food.
Not hungry. Me either.
Uncle Joe, how can
you eat at a time like this?
Well, this is a perfect time.
When Nutty
Norman's at the table,
nobody else had a chance.
How do your girls
expect to do any dancing
when you're not eating?
Who's going to be dancing?
Now no one can get
here for the jamboree.
Oh, no, let's not give up.
We got a lot of
things going for us.
Maybe Lon Harker will forge
the throttle back
together again.
Maybe Nutty Norman, will...
I mean, Mr. Curtis
will do something.
Please, Kate, not
while I'm eating.
Well, he's certainly trying.
He's pumping the handcar
all the way to Hooterville.
Oh, fine.
It's not enough
losing the train...
Now the handcar's gone.
Well, come on, girls.
If you're not going to eat,
pick up your plates,
take 'em to the kitchen
and help me.
And don't pay any
attention to your Uncle Joe
about anything he
says about Mr. Curtis.
I still say, in spite of
everything that's happened,
that man has something
great inside him.
Yeah, our food.
Good afternoon, ladies.
How do you do?
How do you do?
We're waiting for the train.
Well, I wish you luck.
Uh, pardon me.
Would one of you ladies
please let me have a dime?
It's very important.
Thank you very much.
Hello, operator,
I want to talk person to person
to General Frank Newton.
The number is code
area 311, 555-8324.
I want extension 1-1-1-1.
Operator, charge
this to credit account
555-2368-L, 184.
I just gave you the number.
Code area 311, 555-8324.
Extension 1-1-1-1.
Credit account is
555-2368-L 184.
Oh, oh, this number.
Why didn't you say so.
Hooterville 3.
Oh, hello, Frank?
This is Norman.
Well, how's my favorite general?
Well, you old rascal.
You've been fooling around
with models long enough.
How'd you like to
work on the real thing?
(both gasp)
Well, in course it's important.
I wouldn't ask you otherwise.
Frank, some wonderful
people are depending on it.
Now listen, I want
you to get a hold
of George Prentice in Detroit
and Dave LaSalle in New York
and I want all of you
here in Hooterville
the first thing in the
morning ready to go to work.
Hooterville.
Well, get out your map
and your magnifying glass
and I'll tell you where it is.
Who is he?
That's the hobo
Kate Bradley took in.
They call him Nutty Norman.
I'll say one thing.
You might as well say
good-bye to your dime.
Oh, you're very nice.
(crowing)
Shoo! Get away from here!
Go on! Shoo! Get
along! Just shoo!
You get away from here.
Stop eating this train.
Just because she sat
here since yesterday
doesn't mean she
won't run again.
Anybody showed up yet?
Well, not yet, but the
girls are out looking.
Might as well take
that stupid sign down.
We ain't gonna have no jamboree.
Uncle Joe, whatever you
do, don't start acting gloomy
and pessimistic
in front of the girls.
We gotta keep their spirits up.
Okay.
Mother!
Any sign of the handcar
coming from Hooterville?
No, Mother.
And it would just
break your heart
to see the poor old Cannonball.
Chickens are laying eggs in
her and goats are chewing on her.
It's terrible.
Oh, baby, cheer up.
Everything's gonna be fine.
Isn't it, Uncle Joe?
Oh, y-you bet.
Just fine and dandy.
Yeah, you see... Mom! Oh.
Any sign of Floyd and Charlie?
Not a sign, Mother.
And we hiked clear
over to the county road.
Well, now, don't
get discouraged.
Everything's going to be fine.
Isn't it, Uncle Joe?
You bet, just fine and dandy.
What are you doing?
I'm gonna take this
stupid sign down.
We ain't gonna have no jamboree.
Now... later.
Norman. Norman, jar that loose.
Kate. Kate.
What's the matter.
That freeloader, Nutty Norman.
He's back, and he brung
his rat pack with him.
Rat pack? Three
more freeloaders.
Hoboes just like him.
This time, they're gonna
finish the Cannonball for sure.
What do you mean?
They're swarming all
over it, taking it apart.
They're probably
gonna cart it up
and haul it away
and sell it for junk.
Kate, I wouldn't go
down there if I was you.
They look dangerous.
Oh, I'll be all right.
Yell if you need me.
I'll be having a bite of lunch.
Frank!
Communication's
set up. It's ready to go.
Be with you in a minute.
Norm. The valve rod is shot.
What do you suppose
kept her going?
Habit.
Well, I guess we'd better
put another one in, huh?
KATE: Norman.
Hello, Kate. Well, good heavens,
what are you doing to the train?
We're getting it ready
for the jamboree.
That's what you
wanted, wasn't it?
Well, uh... I declare,
you brought in a
whole repair crew.
Yeah, well, you never
saw a crew like this before.
Oh, th-the-they, they
look very ex-experienced.
(chuckles)
Dillon, this is Mrs. Bradley,
the little lady I
told you about.
Kate, I want you to meet
General Frank Newton.
Howdy-do, ma'am?
General?
Retired, ma'am.
Yes, all he does now is serve
as the chairman of the board
of the Michigan and
Southwest Railroad.
(gasps): Goodness.
And this is George Previs.
He's president of
Worldwide Airways.
Ma'am. Newt, let
me have the wrench.
And the fellow up in the
baggage car is Dave LaSalle.
Hey, Dave!
He's president of
Intercontinental Telephone.
Well, they're certainly a
mighty distinguished group.
Kate, the boys have
come a long way,
and, well, they're
working pretty hard
I don't suppose you could
scare up a little... Food.
Yeah. Well, of course I can.
Just give me 15
minutes and then, uh,
bring your... group
up to the dining room.
Oh, bless you.
Okay, go ahead.
Hello. Peterson?
Peterson? Frank Newton.
Now listen.
I want the throttle lever
off the Emma Sweeney.
That's the wood
burner in the north wing.
Right.
Mighty handy having
your own railroad
museum, isn't it?
Dave, call my office. I'll
have a plane pick it up.
What good'll that do? You
can't land a jet around here.
They still make parachutes.
They can drop it right
down the smokestack.
Hey, Peterson. Peterson.
Put that throttle lever
in a metal drop crate
and rush it out to the airport.
Worldwide Airlines
will pick it up.
Dave, uh, get me
my office, will ya?
Uh, just a minute, Norman.
Dave, put me through
to my office first.
Okay.
Operator.
Connect me with the main office
of Worldwide Airlines.
And don't give me
that busy circuit routine.
You can clear it through
Chicago, Denver or New Orleans.
It doesn't matter,
but put it through.
My own company
and I can't get a line.
They're all just like Norman.
Nuttier than fruitcakes.
(all laughing)
By the way, Frank,
did you take advantage
of the market tip I gave you
on Western Mining?
Yeah. Bought 10,000 shares.
Dropped six points in a week.
(all laughing)
Don't blame me.
I got the tip from my secretary.
You've just got the wrong girl.
Mine steered me
into General Products
and I made almost a quarter
of a million in three weeks.
Now that's a secretary.
Not only that, she's
learning to type.
(all laughing)
With all your money,
what are you gonna do
with another quarter million?
I think I'll buy a locomotive
like the Hooterville Cannonball.
Put it in the backyard
and work on it weekends.
I haven't had so
much fun in years.
(laughing): How
about it, Norman?
Do you want to sell the
Hooterville Cannonball?
Sorry, boys. She's not for sale.
(men groaning)
A squirrel would
have a feast in there.
Kate. Kate. We gotta get
them hoboes outta here
as quick as we can.
They're plumb, raving loony.
You oughta hear 'em talking
about the money they got.
Oh, Uncle Joe, when
men are down on their luck,
they're bound to
exaggerate a little.
It makes them feel better.
Yeah, well, come listen
to the guff they're spouting.
It's plumb crazy.
Norman, this is magnificent.
Why, it's even better
than we used to get
at the Officer's Club.
Well, I wouldn't know
about that, General.
I was an enlisted man myself.
I've eaten all over the world...
France, Italy, the Orient,
the finest ocean liners,
but this is the best,
the most delicious food
I've ever eaten.
No wonder you're so
fond of this place, Norman.
Well, it isn't only the food.
There's also Kate.
DAVE (laughing): I
see what you mean.
I don't blame you.
Mighty attractive woman.
NORMAN: Ohh... now.
I don't think they're
talking so crazy.
Hey, we got it!
Old Lon Harker came through.
Just like new!
Oh, that's wonderful, boys.
Take her down
and put her right on.
Oh, please, Kate, feed us first.
We're starving.
I'll clear out all
the freeloaders.
Hurry up, fellows.
Now, they'll be
through here with our...
Oh, no!
Mr. Curtis, what have
you got against our train?
That was a beautiful drop.
With that wind drift, it
oughta land right in our lap.
When I run an
airline, I run an airline.
Look, Mom, it's falling
right down by the tracks.
I wonder what it could be.
Well, whatever
it is it's for them.
They're running after it.
Kate, I was wrong
about those men.
And I'm big enough to admit it.
They ain't hoboes.
They're spies.
(whistle blowing)
By golly, Norman, I believe
she's as good as ever!
(cheering and laughter)
She's better than ever.
We fixed things on there
you didn't even know about.
Sure.
They've been riding
the rails so long,
they're experts.
Let it roll, boys.
We're gonna have
a jamboree after all.
(screaming)
(indistinct chatter)
(bell clanging)
(whistle blowing)
(engine chugging, bell clanging)
Welcome to Shady Rest.
How are you, Oscar?
(indistinct chatter)
What do you mean,
I could use Phoebe
for my secretary?
Well, she'll give you
some real hot tips
on the market. Oh.
Listen.
Phoebe, what'll General
Products Common do
on the market next week?
Going up.
(men laugh)
Hello, Lynnie.
Nettie, come on
over. Well, hello.
Welcome to Shady Rest. Hello.
Welcome to Shady Rest.
Oh, Uncle Joe, this is gonna
be the best jamboree yet.
And I didn't even think
it was gonna come off.
Me neither.
Boy, what a jinx that Nutty
Norman turned out to be.
What do you mean?
Why, he was responsible
for fixing the train.
Well, that's the least
he could have done.
Nothing ever happened
to it until he came.
I tell you, Kate,
the man's a jinx.
I thought you said he was a spy.
Well, that's the worst kind.
Oh, Uncle Joe.
Hi, Charley. Hi, Charley!
Hello, Floyd.
What happened to your hand?
Firebox door bit me.
Darn thing ain't
worked in 20 years
and them fellas had to
come along and put a spring.
Huh!
But-but Floyd's the only
one can double on fiddle.
Oh, how can you have a jamboree
without a fiddler? That's easy.
You don't. Sorry, folks.
Like I said, Kate,
that fella's a jinx.
(whispering): Watch
it, Joe, here he comes.
Yeah, let's go, Kate.
The boys haven't been
to a jamboree in years.
They're champing at the bit.
Well, they're not gonna
need a harness tonight.
What do you mean?
You had to go fix
the firebox door.
Yeah, you wrecked his
fiddling hand that's what you did.
Now let's see you fix that.
Well, that's the easiest
thing in the world.
Come on, Floyd. Ow!
Yeah, he'll fix it all right.
He'll probably
wreck the other hand.
The jinx.
♪ ♪
(country dance music playing)
(crowd cheering)
(cheering continues)
(cheering continues)
(applause and cheering)
(song ends)
(country dance music intro)
We sure would have
been in a terrible fix
if it hadn't been
for Norman Curtis.
Don't you think it's about time
you admitted you were wrong?
Oh, I guess so.
But how was I to know
he could play the fiddle?
Ms. Bradley, may I have
the honor of this dance?
With pleasure, General.
General.
Come on, Joe.
Don't be a wallflower.
(theme song playing)
This has been a
Filmways Presentation.
♪ Come ride the little train ♪
♪ That is rollin' down the
tracks to the Junction ♪
(bell clanging)
♪ Forget about your cares ♪
♪ It is time to relax
at the Junction ♪
(whistle blows twice)
♪ Lots of curves, you bet ♪
♪ And even more when you get ♪
♪ To the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction ♪
(snare drum plays train rhythm)
♪ There's a little hotel called
the Shady Rest at the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction ♪
♪ It is run by Kate, come and
be her guest at the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction ♪
♪ And that's Uncle Joe,
he's a-movin' kinda slow ♪
♪ At the Junction ♪
♪ Petticoat Junction! ♪
(train whistle blows twice)
two and three and four
and five, six, seven, eight.
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight.
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight.
Here, here, what's going on?
We're working on a new finish
for the Jamboree Hoedown, Mom.
Yeah, see how you like it.
GIRLS: ♪ Da-da-da-da-da,
bum-bum. ♪
That's very, very good.
Of course, it would be
better with boys. Uh-huh.
Anything's better with boys.
Yeah, here.
Add these to the decorations.
And get busy.
Where's Uncle Joe?
BETTY JO: In the
dining room, Mom.
Uncle Joe, you promised to
hang that sign out front for us.
Kate, I've only got two
hands and one mouth.
Well, I guess the girls
and I can manage it.
How about a little help
from your hobo friend?
Who?
That no-good moocher
that's taking you for
free room and board.
I presume you're referring
to Mr. Norman Curtis.
I'm referring to Nutty
Norman, the freeloader.
Uncle Joe, Mr. Curtis may be
temporarily financially
embarrassed,
but he is an
ambitious, intelligent,
refined, well-educated
gentleman.
Don't waste all that
hot air, put it in here.
You're going to be
sorry when you find out
where he is right now.
In the kitchen eating
up all the food?
No, sir.
He's gone to Pixley
with Floyd and Charley.
He's got a plan
to attach a flatcar
to the back of the
train, put benches on it
and bring 50 extra
people to our jamboree.
Now where would
he get a flatcar?
He... he says he has
connections with the railroad.
(chuckles)
His only connections
are with a knife and fork.
Well, Floyd and Charley
thought enough of his plan
to take him into
Pixley with them.
In fact, they gave
him the throttle.
That's dangerous. Why?
He might put ketchup
on it and eat it.
He sure looks happy, don't he?
Of course he does.
Poor old hobo...
All of his life he's
been riding the rods,
and now he's at the throttle
of the Hooterville Cannonball.
Hey, Norman. Yeah.
You really think you
can get that flatcar?
Well, I told you fellas,
I got connections
with this railroad.
(phone ringing)
Mr. Curtis' office.
No, I'm sorry, Mr. Curtis
is out of the city
for a few days...
(phone ringing)
Secretary of Labor?
Yes, I'll tell him.
Mr. Curtis' office.
No, I'm sorry. He won't
be able to go to Washington
for the White House
conference. (phone ringing)
Mr. Curtis' office.
No, no, I'm sorry,
he's someplace between
Hooterville and Pixley.
(phone ringing) I don't
know where they are either.
(phones ringing)
Come on, Mom, you can dance it.
One, two, three, four...
(girls laughing)
Now, that's...
Save that for your young fellas.
Uncle Joe and I will
watch from the sidelines.
Well, speak for yourself, Kate.
I can shake a foot with
any of these young bucks.
Come on, Uncle Joe.
Come on.
One, two, three, four...
There's a step you can do.
Look, two more fellas.
Now we all have partners.
Come on, Charley. We're doing
a new dance for the jamboree.
Hold it, hold it, girls.
I'm afraid there ain't
gonna be a jamboree.
How can that be?
There's no way for
the folks to get here.
That fella Curtis has
wrecked the Cannonball.
Wrecked the Cannonball?
What?!
He just as good as wrecked it.
Busted the throttle
right smack off.
Can't run a train
without a throttle.
How'd it happen?
He tried to show off
going up Bleaker's Hill.
Yanked the throttle back so hard
he snapped it right in two.
Pretty much pulled a
rod right out of the boiler.
Yeah, Floyd and I had to pound
it back with a block of wood.
Shut off the steam.
Well, what'd you do, walk all
the way from Bleaker's Hill?
No, we let it roll backwards
and coasted to here.
Well, Kate, what do you think
of your refined,
intelligent Mr. Curtis now?
He's wrecked a train
and ruined our jamboree.
I hope you're satisfied.
Shh. Here he comes.
Now don't just
stand there, Kate,
go get him something to eat.
He's probably hungry
after all he did today.
I don't know what to say.
Take a crack at "good-bye."
Now, Uncle Joe...
Charley, can't the
throttle be fixed?
I'm afraid we'll have
to get a new one.
FLOYD: A new old one.
They ain't made 'em
like that in 50 years.
Might as well face it, Kate...
The Cannonball
can't be fixed in time
to bring the folks
to the jamboree.
Yes, it can.
Now listen to me, everyone...
Quiet, folks, we're gonna
hear some words of wisdom
from our distinguished
hobo guest.
I hadn't intended to
reveal my identity to you,
but now I think I should.
And then you'll know that
I can have the train fixed.
I am Norman P. Curtis...
President of the
C. & F.W. Railroad.
Charley, are you sure
that throttle can't be fixed.
Don't you believe me?
Norman, this is
no time for jokes.
But wait a minute, Kate.
I'll prove it to you.
Anybody got a dime?
Aw, forget it, Norman.
That thing's as
phony as you are.
What?
It's got the same
kind of connections
with the telephone company
you've got with the railroad...
None.
Well, why is it here?
Gives the hotel class.
Which it's going to need
plenty of with you here.
Norman, you're pathetic.
Maybe Lon Harker can fix that.
He's a farmer.
He also does blacksmithing.
If he can mend a plow,
why can't he
forge that together?
How we gonna get up
to his place with no train?
Cut through the woods
to the county road
and hitch a ride.
Let's go, Charley.
It's worth a try.
I just wanted to say,
I'm awful sorry
about Mr. Curtis.
Kind of feel like it's my fault
for inviting him to stay here.
Aw, Kate, don't be
blaming yourself.
It's our fault, too.
We let him drive the train.
Kate, I'm kind of worried
about Floyd and me going off
and leaving you and the
girls and Nutty Norman.
But Uncle Joe's here.
Well, that's what I mean.
Can you handle two of them?
Get out of here, both of you.
Kate, if I can only
get to a telephone,
I guarantee you I can have
that train running again.
Well, the nearest
telephone is in Hooterville.
Isn't there any
way I can get there?
There's a handcar
down by the water tower,
but, uh, that's a mighty
long way to pump.
Well, I was the stroke
on the Yale varsity crew
that beat Harvard,
Princeton and Cornell.
Yeah.
Oh, I liked him so much better
before he started
all that bragging.
What's the matter?
You girls haven't
touched a bite of your food.
Not hungry. Me either.
Uncle Joe, how can
you eat at a time like this?
Well, this is a perfect time.
When Nutty
Norman's at the table,
nobody else had a chance.
How do your girls
expect to do any dancing
when you're not eating?
Who's going to be dancing?
Now no one can get
here for the jamboree.
Oh, no, let's not give up.
We got a lot of
things going for us.
Maybe Lon Harker will forge
the throttle back
together again.
Maybe Nutty Norman, will...
I mean, Mr. Curtis
will do something.
Please, Kate, not
while I'm eating.
Well, he's certainly trying.
He's pumping the handcar
all the way to Hooterville.
Oh, fine.
It's not enough
losing the train...
Now the handcar's gone.
Well, come on, girls.
If you're not going to eat,
pick up your plates,
take 'em to the kitchen
and help me.
And don't pay any
attention to your Uncle Joe
about anything he
says about Mr. Curtis.
I still say, in spite of
everything that's happened,
that man has something
great inside him.
Yeah, our food.
Good afternoon, ladies.
How do you do?
How do you do?
We're waiting for the train.
Well, I wish you luck.
Uh, pardon me.
Would one of you ladies
please let me have a dime?
It's very important.
Thank you very much.
Hello, operator,
I want to talk person to person
to General Frank Newton.
The number is code
area 311, 555-8324.
I want extension 1-1-1-1.
Operator, charge
this to credit account
555-2368-L, 184.
I just gave you the number.
Code area 311, 555-8324.
Extension 1-1-1-1.
Credit account is
555-2368-L 184.
Oh, oh, this number.
Why didn't you say so.
Hooterville 3.
Oh, hello, Frank?
This is Norman.
Well, how's my favorite general?
Well, you old rascal.
You've been fooling around
with models long enough.
How'd you like to
work on the real thing?
(both gasp)
Well, in course it's important.
I wouldn't ask you otherwise.
Frank, some wonderful
people are depending on it.
Now listen, I want
you to get a hold
of George Prentice in Detroit
and Dave LaSalle in New York
and I want all of you
here in Hooterville
the first thing in the
morning ready to go to work.
Hooterville.
Well, get out your map
and your magnifying glass
and I'll tell you where it is.
Who is he?
That's the hobo
Kate Bradley took in.
They call him Nutty Norman.
I'll say one thing.
You might as well say
good-bye to your dime.
Oh, you're very nice.
(crowing)
Shoo! Get away from here!
Go on! Shoo! Get
along! Just shoo!
You get away from here.
Stop eating this train.
Just because she sat
here since yesterday
doesn't mean she
won't run again.
Anybody showed up yet?
Well, not yet, but the
girls are out looking.
Might as well take
that stupid sign down.
We ain't gonna have no jamboree.
Uncle Joe, whatever you
do, don't start acting gloomy
and pessimistic
in front of the girls.
We gotta keep their spirits up.
Okay.
Mother!
Any sign of the handcar
coming from Hooterville?
No, Mother.
And it would just
break your heart
to see the poor old Cannonball.
Chickens are laying eggs in
her and goats are chewing on her.
It's terrible.
Oh, baby, cheer up.
Everything's gonna be fine.
Isn't it, Uncle Joe?
Oh, y-you bet.
Just fine and dandy.
Yeah, you see... Mom! Oh.
Any sign of Floyd and Charlie?
Not a sign, Mother.
And we hiked clear
over to the county road.
Well, now, don't
get discouraged.
Everything's going to be fine.
Isn't it, Uncle Joe?
You bet, just fine and dandy.
What are you doing?
I'm gonna take this
stupid sign down.
We ain't gonna have no jamboree.
Now... later.
Norman. Norman, jar that loose.
Kate. Kate.
What's the matter.
That freeloader, Nutty Norman.
He's back, and he brung
his rat pack with him.
Rat pack? Three
more freeloaders.
Hoboes just like him.
This time, they're gonna
finish the Cannonball for sure.
What do you mean?
They're swarming all
over it, taking it apart.
They're probably
gonna cart it up
and haul it away
and sell it for junk.
Kate, I wouldn't go
down there if I was you.
They look dangerous.
Oh, I'll be all right.
Yell if you need me.
I'll be having a bite of lunch.
Frank!
Communication's
set up. It's ready to go.
Be with you in a minute.
Norm. The valve rod is shot.
What do you suppose
kept her going?
Habit.
Well, I guess we'd better
put another one in, huh?
KATE: Norman.
Hello, Kate. Well, good heavens,
what are you doing to the train?
We're getting it ready
for the jamboree.
That's what you
wanted, wasn't it?
Well, uh... I declare,
you brought in a
whole repair crew.
Yeah, well, you never
saw a crew like this before.
Oh, th-the-they, they
look very ex-experienced.
(chuckles)
Dillon, this is Mrs. Bradley,
the little lady I
told you about.
Kate, I want you to meet
General Frank Newton.
Howdy-do, ma'am?
General?
Retired, ma'am.
Yes, all he does now is serve
as the chairman of the board
of the Michigan and
Southwest Railroad.
(gasps): Goodness.
And this is George Previs.
He's president of
Worldwide Airways.
Ma'am. Newt, let
me have the wrench.
And the fellow up in the
baggage car is Dave LaSalle.
Hey, Dave!
He's president of
Intercontinental Telephone.
Well, they're certainly a
mighty distinguished group.
Kate, the boys have
come a long way,
and, well, they're
working pretty hard
I don't suppose you could
scare up a little... Food.
Yeah. Well, of course I can.
Just give me 15
minutes and then, uh,
bring your... group
up to the dining room.
Oh, bless you.
Okay, go ahead.
Hello. Peterson?
Peterson? Frank Newton.
Now listen.
I want the throttle lever
off the Emma Sweeney.
That's the wood
burner in the north wing.
Right.
Mighty handy having
your own railroad
museum, isn't it?
Dave, call my office. I'll
have a plane pick it up.
What good'll that do? You
can't land a jet around here.
They still make parachutes.
They can drop it right
down the smokestack.
Hey, Peterson. Peterson.
Put that throttle lever
in a metal drop crate
and rush it out to the airport.
Worldwide Airlines
will pick it up.
Dave, uh, get me
my office, will ya?
Uh, just a minute, Norman.
Dave, put me through
to my office first.
Okay.
Operator.
Connect me with the main office
of Worldwide Airlines.
And don't give me
that busy circuit routine.
You can clear it through
Chicago, Denver or New Orleans.
It doesn't matter,
but put it through.
My own company
and I can't get a line.
They're all just like Norman.
Nuttier than fruitcakes.
(all laughing)
By the way, Frank,
did you take advantage
of the market tip I gave you
on Western Mining?
Yeah. Bought 10,000 shares.
Dropped six points in a week.
(all laughing)
Don't blame me.
I got the tip from my secretary.
You've just got the wrong girl.
Mine steered me
into General Products
and I made almost a quarter
of a million in three weeks.
Now that's a secretary.
Not only that, she's
learning to type.
(all laughing)
With all your money,
what are you gonna do
with another quarter million?
I think I'll buy a locomotive
like the Hooterville Cannonball.
Put it in the backyard
and work on it weekends.
I haven't had so
much fun in years.
(laughing): How
about it, Norman?
Do you want to sell the
Hooterville Cannonball?
Sorry, boys. She's not for sale.
(men groaning)
A squirrel would
have a feast in there.
Kate. Kate. We gotta get
them hoboes outta here
as quick as we can.
They're plumb, raving loony.
You oughta hear 'em talking
about the money they got.
Oh, Uncle Joe, when
men are down on their luck,
they're bound to
exaggerate a little.
It makes them feel better.
Yeah, well, come listen
to the guff they're spouting.
It's plumb crazy.
Norman, this is magnificent.
Why, it's even better
than we used to get
at the Officer's Club.
Well, I wouldn't know
about that, General.
I was an enlisted man myself.
I've eaten all over the world...
France, Italy, the Orient,
the finest ocean liners,
but this is the best,
the most delicious food
I've ever eaten.
No wonder you're so
fond of this place, Norman.
Well, it isn't only the food.
There's also Kate.
DAVE (laughing): I
see what you mean.
I don't blame you.
Mighty attractive woman.
NORMAN: Ohh... now.
I don't think they're
talking so crazy.
Hey, we got it!
Old Lon Harker came through.
Just like new!
Oh, that's wonderful, boys.
Take her down
and put her right on.
Oh, please, Kate, feed us first.
We're starving.
I'll clear out all
the freeloaders.
Hurry up, fellows.
Now, they'll be
through here with our...
Oh, no!
Mr. Curtis, what have
you got against our train?
That was a beautiful drop.
With that wind drift, it
oughta land right in our lap.
When I run an
airline, I run an airline.
Look, Mom, it's falling
right down by the tracks.
I wonder what it could be.
Well, whatever
it is it's for them.
They're running after it.
Kate, I was wrong
about those men.
And I'm big enough to admit it.
They ain't hoboes.
They're spies.
(whistle blowing)
By golly, Norman, I believe
she's as good as ever!
(cheering and laughter)
She's better than ever.
We fixed things on there
you didn't even know about.
Sure.
They've been riding
the rails so long,
they're experts.
Let it roll, boys.
We're gonna have
a jamboree after all.
(screaming)
(indistinct chatter)
(bell clanging)
(whistle blowing)
(engine chugging, bell clanging)
Welcome to Shady Rest.
How are you, Oscar?
(indistinct chatter)
What do you mean,
I could use Phoebe
for my secretary?
Well, she'll give you
some real hot tips
on the market. Oh.
Listen.
Phoebe, what'll General
Products Common do
on the market next week?
Going up.
(men laugh)
Hello, Lynnie.
Nettie, come on
over. Well, hello.
Welcome to Shady Rest. Hello.
Welcome to Shady Rest.
Oh, Uncle Joe, this is gonna
be the best jamboree yet.
And I didn't even think
it was gonna come off.
Me neither.
Boy, what a jinx that Nutty
Norman turned out to be.
What do you mean?
Why, he was responsible
for fixing the train.
Well, that's the least
he could have done.
Nothing ever happened
to it until he came.
I tell you, Kate,
the man's a jinx.
I thought you said he was a spy.
Well, that's the worst kind.
Oh, Uncle Joe.
Hi, Charley. Hi, Charley!
Hello, Floyd.
What happened to your hand?
Firebox door bit me.
Darn thing ain't
worked in 20 years
and them fellas had to
come along and put a spring.
Huh!
But-but Floyd's the only
one can double on fiddle.
Oh, how can you have a jamboree
without a fiddler? That's easy.
You don't. Sorry, folks.
Like I said, Kate,
that fella's a jinx.
(whispering): Watch
it, Joe, here he comes.
Yeah, let's go, Kate.
The boys haven't been
to a jamboree in years.
They're champing at the bit.
Well, they're not gonna
need a harness tonight.
What do you mean?
You had to go fix
the firebox door.
Yeah, you wrecked his
fiddling hand that's what you did.
Now let's see you fix that.
Well, that's the easiest
thing in the world.
Come on, Floyd. Ow!
Yeah, he'll fix it all right.
He'll probably
wreck the other hand.
The jinx.
♪ ♪
(country dance music playing)
(crowd cheering)
(cheering continues)
(cheering continues)
(applause and cheering)
(song ends)
(country dance music intro)
We sure would have
been in a terrible fix
if it hadn't been
for Norman Curtis.
Don't you think it's about time
you admitted you were wrong?
Oh, I guess so.
But how was I to know
he could play the fiddle?
Ms. Bradley, may I have
the honor of this dance?
With pleasure, General.
General.
Come on, Joe.
Don't be a wallflower.
(theme song playing)
This has been a
Filmways Presentation.