Party of Five (1994–2000): Season 4, Episode 13 - Parent Trap - full transcript
With Kirsten's help, an ever increasing sickly Charlie meets with an herbalist and even tries out meditation which seems to help his state of mind, but not his cancer. Julia and Griffin, unable to help each other during crises, come to realize the distance between them due to Julia's busy work schedule and Griffin's continuing back luck at his bike shop over loss of business and confiscation of his property over not paying up on the rent. Meanwhile, Bailey tries to seek more time to be with Annie, while she ponders whether or not to tell her seven-year-old daughter, Natalie, about her and Bailey. Also, Claudia tries more than ever to get Reed to like her, but to no avail for he clearly states that he's not interested in her, leaving her more alone and sad than ever when no one else at home wants to listen to her problems.
THINK.
IT'S DUMB.
NO, COME ON.
DO YOU--DO YOU WANT TO MAKE LOVE
ON THE BEACH LIKE...
FROM HERE TO ETERNITY OR...
IN A ROMANTIC MOUNTAIN CABIN
LIKE--WHAT WAS THAT MOVIE?
OK, OK.
MY FANTASY...
IS ONE NIGHT WITH YOU
ALONE, WITHOUT--
Nat: MOMMY!
(SIGHS)
YEAH.
NOT THAT I DON'T LOVE NAT.
MOMMY!
SHH! SHE'LL HEAR YOU.
AND THAT WOULD BE SO BAD BECAUSE...
WE'VE BEEN OVER THIS.
I'M COMING, HONEY!
MOMMY, I'M SCARED.
THERE'S A MONSTER IN MY ROOM.
NO, SWEETHEART, THERE ISN'T, OK?
COME ON, I'M GONNA SHOW YOU.
NO.
HONEY...
LOOK, WE--WE TALKED ABOUT THIS,
OK, SWEETHEART?
YOU'RE A BIG GIRL, AND--AND YOU
HAVE TO SLEEP
IN YOUR OWN ROOM.
READ TO ME?
OK. IN YOUR ROOM.
UH-UH. MY FAVORITE'S IN HERE.
OK. ONE STORY.
YES.
FROM THE BEGINNING. DON'T SKIP.
OK.
"ONCE UPON A TIME,
"THERE WAS A TROLL WHO LOVED A PRINCESS.
"SHE LIVED IN A CASTLE,
"HE LIVED IN A CAVE.
THE CAVE WAS DARK AND VERY, VERY SMALL."
WHO PUT THE ICE TRAY AWAY EMPTY?
CLIENT NUMBER 2282.
JULE, WE'RE OUT OF ICE.
SALINGER. JULIA SALINGER.
IS THERE SOME COFFEE MADE, JULE?
AND WHERE IS THAT ADDRESS, DOWNTOWN?
(WHISPERING) Hey, Jule...can I borrow
your earrings?
I'LL BE THERE. ABSOLUTELY. THANK YOU.
DOES ANYONE CARE THAT I WAS ON THE PHONE
WITH THE TEMP AGENCY GETTING A JOB?
I NEED SOMETHING COLD.
I GOT THIS RASH.
THAT'S DISGUSTING.
OK, I HAVE TO BE OUT OF HERE IN,
LIKE, 2 MINUTES.
OWEN, ARE YOU READY? I'M GONNA TAKE YOU
TO DAY CARE,
AND GRIFFIN'S GONNA PICK YOU UP.
WHERE'S HIS LUNCH BOX?
WAIT, HOLD ON A SECOND.
I CAN'T JUST CLOSE UP THE SHOP.
FOR, LIKE, 5 MINUTES. BRING HIM HOME.
CLAUDIA'LL BABY-SIT.
ARE YOU WEARING MAKEUP?
Griffin: I CAN'T.
WHAT IF A CUSTOMER COMES WHEN I'M CLOSED?
GRIFFIN, I CAN'T DO EVERYTHING.
CLAUD, ARE YOU TALLER?
ACTUALLY, I'M--
Julia: THOSE ARE MY BOOTS.
(SNIFFING) AND MY PERSUASION.
I WAS GONNA ASK.
RE THOSE MY EARRINGS?
YEAH.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
DO YOU LIKE 'EM?
YEAH, I LIKE 'EM. THEY'RE MINE.
TAKE 'EM OFF.
IT'S A RASH.
I KNOW THAT. I MEAN, I CAN SEE THAT,
BUT...
WHAT DOES IT MEAN? IS IT NORMAL?
THERE IS NO NORMAL.
EVERYBODY RESPONDS DIFFERENTLY
TO RADIATION.
I KNOW. AND MY BODY RESPONDS WITH NAUSEA,
FATIGUE, AND MOUTH SORES,
BUT THIS IS-- THIS IS A RASH.
I MEAN, YOU GOTTA BE ABLE TO GIVE ME
SOMETHING FOR THIS.
DID YOU TRY THE CORTISONE?
IT DIDN'T WORK.
I'M STILL ITCHING.
CHARLIE, I KNOW IT'S UNCOMFORTABLE--
IT'S NOT THAT. IT'S JUST...
I MEAN, IT'S...
THIS IS JUST A RASH.
YOU'VE GOTTA BE ABLE TO GIVE ME
SOMETHING FOR THIS.
CHARLIE...
I UNDERSTAND YOU'RE FRUSTRATED,
BUT EVERYTHING TAKES TIME.
CALL ME IF YOU NEED ANYTHING.
Annie, on phone: OK, TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT.
FOR WHAT?
I DEFINITELY SAID 12 POUNDS TUNA,
12 POUNDS SALMON.
THIS IS ALL SALMON.
WHAT YOU WANTED. A WHOLE NIGHT.
YOU, ME, ALONE.
NATALIE BEGGED TO SLEEP AT MELISSA'S,
AND I USUALLY DON'T ALLOW SLEEP-OVERS
ON THE WEEKDAYS,
BUT I DECIDED TO MAKE AN EXCEPTION.
AN EXCEPTION. WELL, THAT'S GREAT,
BUT--HEY!
DON'T YOU THINK WE SHOULD'VE TALKED
ABOUT THIS FIRST?
THEY DON'T PAY ME TO TALK. THEY
PAY ME TO DELIVER.
NOT YOU. MY GIRLFRIEND.
I THOUGHT YOU'D BE HAPPY.
I AM HAPPY.
GOOD. I'M LEAVING.
WAIT.
I WENT SHOPPING. I BOUGHT ALL
YOUR FAVORITE FOOD.
ORDER SAYS SALMON.
YEAH, WELL, THAT WAS A MISTAKE.
OBVIOUSLY.
NOT YOU. THE DELIVERY GUY.
LOOK, ANNIE, ALL I'M SAYING IS,
IF YOU HAD ASKED ME,
I WOULD'VE TOLD YOU I HAVE TO WORK
ALL NIGHT TONIGHT.
I KNOW. BUT YOU HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL ALL DAY.
AND YOU THINK I LIKE THAT?
DON'T YOU THINK I'D RATHER BE HOME
WITH YOU--
WAIT A SECOND! CALL
MY DISPATCHER.
I WAS JUST HOPING-- I CAN'T.
NUMBER'S ON THE INVOICE.
BUT YOU SAID-- I GOTTA GO.
BAILEY! I GOTTA GO!
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH 25 POUNDS OF SALMON?
REED?
LOOK, BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING,
UH...
I'M SORRY.
REALLY, REALLY, REALLY SORRY.
IT'S OK, SALINGER.
NO, IT'S NOT.
NO, IT'S NOT. I MEAN, WHAT I DID
TO YOU THE OTHER DAY,
SCREAMING AT YOU LIKE THAT,
IT WAS INCREDIBLY, UH,
I DON'T KNOW, NOT LIKE ME.
NOT LIKE ME AT ALL.
I KNOW. JUST BETWEEN YOU
AND CHARLIE
AND EVERYTHING THAT'S GOING ON
AT HOME RIGHT NOW,
I GUESS I...
I DON'T KNOW. I JUST--I--I FREAKED!
IT'S OK, SALINGER.
IT IS?
I GET IT.
WOW. THAT IS, LIKE, SO...
SO UNDERSTANDING.
FORGET ABOUT IT, HUH?
I HAVE.
HEY, SALINGER, DID YOU, LIKE,
DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT
TO YOUR HAIR?
WELL, I...
I CURLED IT BACK.
WELL, IT LOOKS NICE.
OH...
CLAUDIA, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?
RIGHT HERE!
OWEN, OWEN, GET OVER HERE!
CLAUDIA, I CAN'T HAVE OWEN DOWN HERE.
I WENT HOME, AND YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO BABY-SIT--OWEN?
OWEN!
OWEN! OWEN!
OWEN, WATCH IT NOW. WATCH IT.
UHH! GOSH...
THAT YOUR SON?
WHAT? OH, NO. NO.
HE'S MY BROTHER-IN-LAW.
OWEN, COME HERE.
MEET MAC. MAC'S A SUPPLIER.
HE GIVES US SUPPLIES FOR THE SHOP.
GIVING ISN'T EXACTLY THE IDEA.
UH...
RIGHT. SORRY.
POOR CHOICE OF WORDS.
YOUR CHECK BOUNCED. AGAIN.
WHA--UH...
OWEN, NO!
HEY, HEY, HEY, COME HERE.
YOU KNOW, YOU OWE ME FOR 3 MONTHS.
I WANT PAYMENT IN FULL, IN CASH,
BY FRIDAY, OR I TAKE THAT COMPUTER BACK.
NO, WAIT, COME ON. THERE'S GOT TO BE
ANOTHER WAY
FOR US TO WORK THIS OUT.
ALL RIGHT? ALL RIGHT, YOU TAKE THE COMPUTER,
IT'S GONNA TAKE ME, LIKE...
TWICE...3 TIMES AS LONG TO GET
ALL THIS WORK DONE.
ALL RIGHT?
LOOK, SEE MY SIGN OVER THERE? IT SAYS,
"OVERNIGHT SERVICE."
THAT'S WHY PEOPLE COME HERE.
BECAUSE I'M FAST.
RIGHT? IF I'M NOT FAST, THEY'RE NOT GONNA COME.
IF THEY DON'T COME, I DON'T GET MY MONEY.
IF I DON'T GET MY MONEY, THEN I'M NEVER GONNA BE ABLE
TO GIVE YOU WHAT I OWE YOU.
FRIDAY.
UH...
WHOA!
WHOA!
OWEN!
IF PAUL SAW ME AT AN HERBALIST,
HE'D FILE FOR DIVORCE.
DOCTORS ALL THINK
IT'S SOME KIND OF VOODOO OR SOMETHING.
CHARLIE SALINGER.
DR. FONG.
UH, DO I CALL YOU DOCTOR?
YOU SHOULD KNOW I'M NOT REALLY
A FIRM BELIEVER IN THIS STUFF.
I MEAN, I WANT TO BELIEVE--
SHOW ME YOUR TONGUE.
HMM.
YOU HAVE HODGKIN'S DISEASE.
WOW! THAT'S INCREDIBLE.
IT TOOK MY DOCTORS WEEKS AND ABOUT A MILLION TESTS
TO FIGURE THAT OUT,
AND THEY STILL MISSED IT THE FIRST TIME.
YOU ALSO HAVE A RASH.
YES. THAT'S AMAZING! HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?
LITTLE BUMPS ON YOUR NECK.
OH.
RADIATION, CORRECT?
YEAH.
HMM...
YOU EXPOSE YOURSELF TO INORGANIC RAYS
AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT,
WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?
OF COURSE YOU'LL HAVE A REACTION.
WESTERN MEDICINE.
THEY'LL POISON YOUR BODY IN ORDER TO CURE IT.
TRY THIS...
AND THIS...
AND THESE.
THESE ARE ACTUALLY GONNA HELP ME?
THEY'LL HELP YOUR RASH.
(UNSCREWS JAR)
FIRST THINGS FIRST.
NO, I'M NOT KIDDING. I WANT 3 SALMON SPECIALS--
POACHED, MOUSSE, AND... I DON'T CARE. SUSHI.
BAILEY, IT'S ANNIE.
I'LL CALL HER BACK.
NOT ON THE PHONE. HERE.
I KNOW, I KNOW. YOU'RE CRAZED.
I JUST WANTED TO COME BY HERE
AND THEN...
WHEN YOU HAVE 5 MINUTES
OF DOWN TIME--
BAILEY, WE'RE WAY OVERBOOKED AT 6:00.
I'M NOT GONNA HAVE ANY DOWN TIME.
TONIGHT'S NOT GONNA WORK.
BUT...NATALIE'S GONNA BE HOME
TOMORROW.
WELL, THAT'S FINE.
THEN TOMORROW I'LL COME BY AND
WE'LL SIT NAT DOWN
AND WE'LL FINALLY TELL HER--
NO.
I TOLD YOU, I DON'T WANT TO
TELL NAT ABOUT US.
NOT YET.
WELL, THEN WHAT?
WE KEEP SNEAKING AROUND?
2 HOURS UNDER YOUR BED, I COULD BARELY MOVE MY NECK.
OH, WELL! YOU KNOW WHAT?
THERE'S A REASON FOR ME TO CHANGE
MY WHOLE PARENTING PHILOSOPHY.
ANNIE,
WE'RE TOGETHER.
I WANT TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD
WE'RE TOGETHER.
WHY CAN'T YOU TELL NAT?
'CAUSE...SHE'S NOT THE WHOLE WORLD.
OK? SHE'S MY DAUGHTER.
AND SHE'S ONLY 7 YEARS OLD,
AND I AM NOT GONNA TURN HER WHOLE LIFE
UPSIDE DOWN
BECAUSE WE WANT TO SLEEP TOGETHER!
NOW, LOOK.
BAILEY,
NATALIE BELIEVES
MOMMIES SLEEP WITH DADDIES.
WHAT'S SHE GONNA THINK WHEN SHE WAKES UP
AND SHE SEES YOU THERE IN THE MORNING?
YOU'RE HER NEW DADDY?
AND IS THIS A GOOD THING,
OR ARE YOU GONNA BE EXACTLY
LIKE HER REAL DADDY
AND JUST LEAVE?
NO. I'M NOT GONNA LEAVE.
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
I MEAN...
WE'VE ONLY BEEN SEEING EACH OTHER
FOR, LIKE, 3 MONTHS.
CAN YOU BE ABSOLUTELY SURE?
I HAVE TO BE CAREFUL WHAT I PROMISE
MY DAUGHTER.
DAMN! DAMN, DAMN!
YOU OWE ME MONEY!
OWEN, WHAT?
IT'S 7:30. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
I'VE BEEN WORKING. WHERE DO YOU THINK?
WHAT IS OWEN YELLING?
"DAMN, YOU OWE ME MONEY, DAMN."
'CAUSE HE'S BEEN AT THE SHOP
WITH ME ALL DAY.
THE SHOP? WITH ALL THAT STUFF THAT'S
TOXIC AND DANGEROUS?
WELL, BEATS LEAVING HIM HERE ALONE.
CLAUDIA!
HEY, I NEVER SAID I'D BABY-SIT.
DAMN! DAMN!
OWEN, STOP IT.
LOOK, HE'S COVERED IN GREASE.
DID YOU EVEN THINK OF GIVING HIM
A BATH?
THAT'S MY JOB, TOO?
HEY, I WAS WORKING!
YEAH? WELL, I SHOULD'VE BEEN WORKING,
NOT HERE WATCHING YOUR LITTLE BROTHER!
HAS HE EATEN YET?
I DON'T KNOW. DID YOU BRING HOME
SOME DINNER?
THERE'S CHICKEN IN THE FRIDGE.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, COOK IT?
YES.
WELL, I--NO!
THAT'S NOT THE WAY IT WORKS, ALL RIGHT?
I'M WORKING ALL DAY.
I'M NOT COMING HOME TO COOKING AND CLEANING
AND SCREAMING KIDS!
DAMN! YOU OWE ME MONEY. DAMN!
I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE. I'M GOING BACK TO THE SHOP.
Julia: OWEN, ARE YOU--
GOD! WHAT IS THAT SMELL?
IT'S DR. FONG'S HERBAL TEA.
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.
EW!
HAS ANYBODY SEEN MY BAG? YUCK!
OH!
ROTTEN EGGS!
CHARLIE'S TEA, AND APPARENTLY
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.
PLUS IT'S GONNA HELP ME GET RID OF THIS RASH,
SO YOU CAN BOTH JUST SPARE ME
THE EDITORIAL COMMENT.
WHAT IS IN THIS, ANYWAY?
"WATER BUFFALO GALLSTONES, DRIED HUMAN PLACENTA..."
OH. WHERE'S THE EYE OF NEWT?
VERY FUNNY.
NO OFFENSE, CHARLIE, BUT I THINK THIS IS
A LOAD OF CRAP.
"COW DUNG."
NO. (SNIFFING)
IT'S IN MY CLOTHES.
I GOTTA CHANGE.
P. U.!
LOOK, YOU GUYS, IT'S NOT THAT BAD,
SO JUST OPEN A WINDOW OR BUY SOME AIR FRESHENER
OR SOMETHING. I DON'T CARE.
I'M DRINKING THIS.
COME ON, OWEN, TIME TO GET YOU
DRESSED.
THAT IS REALLY GROSS.
ANNIE.
ANNIE?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
BRUSHING MY TEETH.
IS THIS LIKE ONE OF THOSE TOOTHPASTE COMMERCIALS
WHERE...THE GIRL JUMPS OUT OF BED
AND QUICKLY BRUSHES HER TEETH
SO SHE CAN JUMP BACK IN BED AND KISS
HER BOYFRIEND
WITH A MINTY-FRESH MOUTH?
NO. THIS IS LIKE REAL LIFE,
WHERE THE GIRL JUMPS OUT OF BED
TO START HER DAY.
WHY?
I MEAN, I DIDN'T EVEN GET HERE TILL, LIKE,
3:00 IN THE MORNING.
3:15.
ISN'T MELISSA'S MOM TAKING NAT
STRAIGHT TO SCHOOL?
THAT'S THE PLAN.
WELL?
I DON'T HAVE TO BE AT SCHOOL
TILL, LIKE, 9:30.
BAILEY...
WHAT?
I HAVE THINGS TO DO.
WHAT COULD BE MORE IMPORTANT
THAN THIS?
WE COULD HANG OUT IN BED FOR A WHILE...
MAYBE MAKE SOME COFFEE...
I MAKE A MEAN DENVER OMELET.
WILL YOU PUT CHEESE IN IT?
AND TOMATOES AND PEPPERS...
ANY WAY YOU LIKE IT.
ALL RIGHT.
LET ME MAKE A CALL.
(CLANKING)
YOU'RE LEAVING WITHOUT EVEN
SAYING GOOD-BYE?
I GOTTA GO TO WORK.
BUT YOU WERE THERE UNTIL 1:00--1:00
IN THE MORNING.
I HAD A LOT OF STUFF TO DO.
I TRIED TO WAIT UP, BUT, UM...
YOU'RE NEVER SUPPOSED TO GO TO BED MAD.
YOU KNOW THAT?
MY MOM USED TO TELL ME THAT.
ONE MORNING I CAME DOWNSTAIRS,
AND THERE WAS COFFEE BURNING ON THE STOVE,
THE TV WAS ON,
MY PARENTS WERE ASLEEP ON THE KITCHEN TABLE.
I DON'T KNOW IF THEY EVER WORKED
THAT ONE OUT, BUT...
THEY TRIED.
(TAKES DEEP BREATH)
I'M NOT MAD, JULE.
(TAKES DEEP BREATH)
THEN WHAT?
OH, I DON'T KNOW. I...
I'M--I'M FRUSTRATED.
IT'S LIKE I COME HOME FROM WORK
AND IT'S LIKE I'VE HAD THIS TERRIBLE DAY
AND BUSINESS SUCKS
AND I WANT TO TELL YOU EVERYTHING.
I REALLY DO.
BUT IT'S EITHER...
OWEN'S CRYING OR CHARLIE'S THROWING UP
OR CLAUDIA'S--
WHO KNOWS WHAT SHE'S DOING?
I KNOW IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT...
AND I KNOW YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS, TOO,
BUT...
I DON'T KNOW. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?
IT'S LIKE ONE SECOND AGO, WE COULDN'T KEEP OUR HANDS
OFF EACH OTHER.
I MEAN, GOD! WE MADE LOVE UNDER THAT TREE!
SHH!
NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT THAT.
IT'S LIKE, NOW WE'RE LIKE THIS OLD MARRIED COUPLE,
BARELY TALKING...
SNIPING AT EACH OTHER ALL THE TIME.
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
NEVER GO TO SLEEP ANGRY.
(GIRLS LAUGHING)
Girl: "DEAR REED, I'M SO HAPPY
WE'RE BACK TOGETHER."
1, 2, 3, 4, 5 EXCLAMATION POINTS.
OH, GOD.
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO WITHOUT YOU."
UNDERLINED.
HEY!
THIS IS HYSTERICAL!
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?
NOTHING.
OH, WAIT. IS THIS--
THAT LETTER'S NOT FOR YOU. THAT'S REED'S LOCKER.
UH, NOT ANYMORE. HE ASKED ME TO
TRADE WITH HIM.
(LAUGHING)
MAYBE HE WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM YOU.
UH, "SA...
SAL--"
SALINGER.
HA!
IT IS YOU.
LEAVE HER ALONE.
HI, REED.
JUST LEAVE HER ALONE.
BROUGHT YOU SOMETHING.
I FOUND IT AT THIS AMAZING BOOKSTORE
IN BERKELEY.
THEY'VE GOT ALL THIS GREAT STUFF
ON ACUPUNCTURE AND MEDITATION.
THANKS.
YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING YOUR TEA?
3 TIMES YESTERDAY AND TWICE TODAY,
JUST LIKE "THE DOCTOR" ORDERED,
AND I'M STILL ITCHING.
REMEMBER THAT CAMPING TRIP
WE TOOK TO YELLOWSTONE
AND YOU WANTED TO GO HOME BECAUSE
OF ALL THE MOSQUITOES?
I TOLD YOU YOU SHOULD'VE
BROUGHT THE NET.
YEAH. WELL, IT'S EXACTLY LIKE THAT,
ONLY ABOUT A MILLION TIMES WORSE.
I'LL GET YOU SOME ICE.
DON'T BOTHER. IT DOESN'T HELP.
NOTHING HELPS. IT'S LIKE...
A HORROR MOVIE.
LIKE INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS
OR SOMETHING.
I JUST GOTTA SIT HERE
WHILE THIS THING
I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO CONTROL OVER
EATS AT ME.
CHARLIE, COME ON.
I MEAN, I KNOW YOU'RE UPSET, BUT...
WE'RE TALKING ABOUT A RASH.
IT'S NOT JUST A RASH, OK?
IT'S NOT JUST A RASH.
I MEAN...
WHAT DID I EXPECT, ANYWAY?
LIKE HERBS CAN CURE ANYTHING.
WHAT ARE THEY?
NOTHING. POWDER.
YOU KNOW, AS LONG AS WE'RE
TALKING ABOUT IT,
WHAT'S RADIATION?
LIGHT.
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?
WHAT IF IT'S ALL VOODOO?
WHAT IF NONE OF IT WORKS?
THAT'D REALLY BE SOMETHING, HUH?
JULIA.
OH. UM...I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND.
I USED MY KEY.
OH. NO, NO.
DEFINITELY NOT.
THE TEMP AGENCY DIDN'T HAVE ANY WORK
FOR ME TODAY,
SO I THOUGHT I'D, YOU KNOW,
HELP OUT HERE WITH THE...
BOOKS OR SOMETHING.
THEN I, UH...
STARTED PAYING THE BILLS,
BUT...
THERE'S NOT A LOT OF MONEY HERE.
UH, YEAH. UM...
DON'T--DON'T WORRY, BECAUSE...
LAST NIGHT, I WORKED IT
ALL OUT. LOOK.
THE MONEY THAT I'M HOLDING FOR HOWIE,
IT'S MAKING, LIKE, 5% INTEREST, RIGHT?
UH-HUH. SO IF I TAKE THAT
OUT OF THE BANK--
HOWIE'S MONEY? YEAH. JUST FOR
A COUPLE OF DAYS.
I CAN PAY OFF MY COMPUTER
AND TAKE CARE OF ALL THESE JOBS.
GRIFFIN-- I'LL HAVE THE MONEY
BACK IN THE BANK
BEFORE HOWIE EVEN KNOWS IT'S GONE.
AND WHAT IF YOU CAN'T?
SEE, I'VE GOT, LIKE, 10 JOB ORDERS
LINED UP.
IT--IT'S NOT YOUR MONEY, GRIFFIN.
GOD, IT'S HOWIE'S, AND YOU DON'T EVEN
KNOW WHERE HE GOT IT.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT KIND OF BUSINESS
HE'S IN.
I TOLD YOU, I'LL PAY IT BACK.
HE WON'T EVEN KNOW IT'S GONE.
AND WHAT IF HE DOES? HAVE YOU THOUGHT
ABOUT THAT?
HE BEAT YOU UP ON YOUR WEDDING DAY.
WHAT IS HE GONNA DO NEXT?
I CAN HANDLE THIS.
OBVIOUSLY YOU CAN'T!
THERE IS, LIKE, NO MONEY HERE!
YOU'RE NOT SLEEPING, AND YOU'RE BARELY EATING.
AND NOW YOU'RE COMING UP WITH SCHEMES TO STEAL
STOLEN MONEY?
IT'S NOT A SCHEME! IT'S A PLAN!
A BAD PLAN,
A PLAN THAT'S GONNA MAKE THINGS WORSE.
THAT'S YOUR DAMN OPINION,
JULIA.
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T NEED IT.
YOU KNOW, Y-YOU'RE MY WIFE.
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SUPPORT ME.
IF YOU CAN'T DO THAT,
THEN DO ME A FAVOR. STAY HOME!
ALL RIGHT? DID YOU HEAR ME?
JUST GO HOME.
HEY.
WHOA!
TOO BAD I GOT TO GET TO WORK.
YOU LOOK GREAT.
A LOT OF GOOD IT DID ME. HE WOULDN'T EVEN SEE ME.
WHO?
THE GUY FROM THE INSURANCE COMPANY.
I MEAN, I GOT ALL DRESSED UP AND WENT
ALL THE WAY DOWNTOWN,
AND THEN THE RECEPTIONIST...
THE RECEPTIONIST--
SAYS TO ME, "I'M SORRY, MISS MOTT,
BUT THE POSITION'S BEEN FILLED."
WAIT A MINUTE...
YOU HAD A JOB INTERVIEW?
I MEAN, SO WHAT IF I RESCHEDULED IT
FOR A FEW HOURS?
I MEAN, HE COULD'VE AT LEAST WAITED--
HOLD ON. YOU RESCHEDULED
AN INTERVIEW?
THIS MORNING. I TOLD YOU THAT.
WHEN YOU WANTED TO STAY IN BED,
I TOLD YOU THAT I HAD THINGS TO DO.
"THINGS."
"THINGS" ARE LIKE...
SHOPPING...
OR GETTING YOUR CAR WASHED.
"THINGS" ARE NOT JOB INTERVIEWS.
I CALLED AND I CHANGED IT
FROM 10:00 TO 4:00.
I MEAN, WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?
THE BIG DEAL... IS THAT AT 10:00
THERE WAS A JOB,
AND AT 4:00 THERE WASN'T.
WELL, HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?
IT DOESN'T MATTER.
YOU NEED A JOB, YOU DON'T RESCHEDULE
AN INTERVIEW.
YEAH, BUT I DID THIS FOR YOU!
WELL, DON'T.
DON'T DO THAT.
YOU SHOULDN'T DO STUFF LIKE THAT
FOR ME.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE.
ONE SECOND, YOU'RE SAYING
WE'RE NEVER ALONE TOGETHER,
SO I, LIKE, TWIST MYSELF INTO A PRETZEL
TRYING TO FIND SOME TIME FOR US TO BE ALONE,
BUT THAT'S WRONG, TOO.
YOU KNOW, I CAN'T WIN WITH YOU.
THAT WAS REALLY NICE, WHAT YOU DID FOR ME.
I MEAN, STICKING UP FOR ME LIKE THAT.
NO ONE EVER DOES THAT.
IT'S NO BIG DEAL.
WELL, MAYBE FOR YOU, BUT...
TO ME, IT...
MEANT A LOT.
LOOK, SALINGER--
I LOVE WHEN YOU CALL ME THAT.
I READ YOUR LETTER.
GOOD.
GOOD. I MEAN, I WROTE IT TO YOU.
LISTEN. SOMEHOW--
AND I DON'T KNOW HOW, BUT--
YOU'VE GOT, LIKE, THE WRONG IDEA.
WE'RE NOT TOGETHER.
BUT I THOUGHT...
WELL, I MEAN, I THOUGHT YOU SAID
THAT YOU FORGAVE ME.
I DID.
THAT STILL DOESN'T MEAN...
I'M NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND,
CLAUDIA.
I TOLD YOU THAT BEFORE.
I MEAN... I LIKE YOU A LOT,
AND WE'RE FRIENDS--
WELL, SURE, NOW, 'CAUSE...
I MEAN, YOU'RE JUST NOT--
YOU'RE JUST NOT THINKING ABOUT IT
IN THE RIGHT WAY.
LOOK AT JANE EYRE AND...
AND ROCHESTER.
I MEAN, HE THOUGHT OF HER AS A GOVERNESS
FOR, LIKE-- FOR, LIKE CHAPTERS...
AND SHE TURNED OUT TO BE THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE.
CLAUDIA, THAT'S A NOVEL.
IT'S FICTION.
DID YOU REALLY ASK THAT GIRL
TO TRADE LOCKERS WITH YOU?
I'M SORRY.
(PLATES AND SILVERWARE CLATTERING)
OWEN, STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR FOOD.
OWEN!
OH, MAN...
YEAH. CLIENT 2282. SALINGER. JULIA SALINGER.
I'M NOT GOING TO SCHOOL.
WHERE? THE RICHMOND
DISTRICT?
I SAID I'M NOT GOING TO SCHOOL.
OK. I'LL BE THERE. THANKS.
FINE. DON'T GO TO SCHOOL.
DON'T YOU EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHY?
CLAUDIA, IT'S FINE. JUST BE HOME WHEN
OWEN GETS HERE, OK?
WHERE ARE MY KEYS? HAVE YOU SEEN
MY KEYS?
CHARLIE, I'M--
WHATEVER IT IS, TALK TO JULIA.
(SIGHS)
I COULDN'T SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
I KEPT THINKING ABOUT...
EVERYTHING.
I WANT TO TELL NAT ABOUT US.
WAIT A MINUTE.
THE WAY I'VE BEEN ACTING,
MAKING EXCUSES, BLAMING OTHER PEOPLE...
IT'S LIKE MY OLD ROUTINES.
YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE I'M DRINKING AGAIN.
DON'T DO THIS, ANNIE.
NO. I HAVE TO.
I MEAN, HIDING YOU UNDER MY BED.
THAT'S WHERE I USED TO HIDE MY BOTTLES.
WE JUST TALKED ABOUT THIS...
2 DAYS AGO,
AND YOU HAD, LIKE, A HUNDRED REASONS WHY
IT WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA.
I WAS WRONG.
ARE YOU DOING THIS FOR ME? BECAUSE--
I'M NOT.
I MEAN, WHAT IS THE WHOLE A.A. THING?
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR CHOICES.
DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES.
THAT'S WHY I'M DOING THIS.
I HAVE TO BE STRAIGHT WITH NAT.
OK.
CHARLIE?
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
CHARLIE?
WAIT. I MUST BE IN THE WRONG HOUSE.
IS THAT...CHARLIE SALINGER MEDITATING?
(LAUGHS)
(LAUGHS)
IT'S, JUST, YOU NEVER STRUCK ME
AS THE TYPE.
I PROBABLY NEVER STRUCK YOU AS THE CANCER TYPE EITHER,
BUT...THERE IT IS.
IS IT HELPING?
WHO KNOWS?
I MEAN, IT'S-- IT'S WEIRD.
THEY TELL YOU TO MAKE UP A MANTRA.
YOU KNOW, SOMETHING TO CLEAR
YOUR HEAD, AND...
AND ALL I KEEP THINKING IS, GOD,
I HOPE THIS WORKS.
GOD, I HOPE THIS WORKS.
NOT EXACTLY STRESS-RELIEVING, HUH?
YEAH, BUT IT'S SOMETHING.
I'M DOING SOMETHING.
I READ THIS ARTICLE THIS MORNING,
AND THEY FOUND SOME PLANT IN MEXICO
THAT CURES CANCER IN MICE.
AND I'M THINKING, SHOULD I GET ON A PLANE?
DOES IT JUST CURE MICE?
DO THEY HAVE TO BE MEXICAN MICE?
I MEAN, I SWEAR, IF SOMEONE TOLD ME
THAT SWINGING A BLACK CAT OVER MY HEAD
3 TIMES RIGHT NOW
WOULD CURE THIS THING, I'D BE, LIKE,
GET ME A BLACK CAT.
(SIGHS)
OH, MAN.
I'VE REALLY LOST IT, HAVEN'T I?
WHAT AM I THINKING?
PLANTS IN MEXICO,
MEDITATING...
I DON'T KNOW.
BUT SINCE WE'VE BEEN TALKING...
YOU HAVEN'T BEEN SCRATCHING.
YEAH, I, UH... JUST HAVE TO RETARD
THE SPARK A FEW DEGREES,
BUT I CAN HAVE IT BACK TO YOU TOMORROW.
THAT QUICK?
YEAH, YEAH. THANKS TO THIS BABY.
SHE SAVES YOU MONEY 'CAUSE SHE SAVES ME TIME.
SEE YOU.
PLACE LOOKS GOOD, KID.
YOU GOT CUSTOMERS, TECHNOLOGY,
ALMOST LIKE A REGULAR BUSINESS.
WHAT DO YOU WANT, HOWIE?
WHAT? CAN'T AN OLD FRIEND
JUST STOP BY
TO SAY HEY TO A PAL? DO I ALWAYS
HAVE TO WANT SOMETHING?
HEY. WRITE ME A CHECK, HUH?
WHAT?
OUT OF OUR ACCOUNT.
SAY, 8 GRAND?
8 GRAND?
WHAT--THAT'LL LEAVE THE ACCOUNT
AT PRACTICALLY ZERO.
YEAH?
WELL, IT'LL CLEAN US OUT.
YEAH?
WE WON'T HAVE ANYTHING LEFT!
WE?
IT'S MY MONEY.
WRITE THE CHECK.
THANKS.
HEY. I'LL CALL YOU.
UH, YEAH, HI.
THIS IS GRIFFIN HOLBROOK.
YEAH.
WHAT?
OH, NO, NO. ACCOUNT TRANSFERS.
UH--WHAT?
OH, HOLD-- HOLD ON. UH--
IT'S ACCOUNT NUMBER 009481.
YEAH, YEAH. I REQUESTED A TRANSFER--
A $10,000 TRANSFER THIS MORNING BETWEEN ACCOUNTS.
WAIT--YEAH--NO, I NEED TO CANCEL.
I THOUGHT ABOUT TELLING HER
THAT SHE WOULD BE DOUBLY SAFE
HAVING 2 GROWNUPS SLEEPING HERE,
YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE SHE'S AFRAID
OF MONSTERS.
BUT THAT JUST IMPLIES THAT SHE'S ONLY
HALF AS SAFE
WHEN YOU'RE NOT HERE, SO--
WAIT--WAIT A MINUTE.
I THOUGHT THE WHOLE IDEA
WAS TO BE HONEST.
COME ON.
NAT?
BAILEY AND I HAVE SOMETHING WE WANT TO TELL YOU.
WANT TO SEE MY PICTURE? IT'S BAILEY.
HEY. YOU MADE ME TALL.
THANKS.
NAT, HONEY,
FROM NOW ON, BAILEY'S GONNA SPEND
A LOT MORE TIME WITH US.
HE ALREADY EATS DINNER WITH US SOMETIMES.
YOU LIKE THAT, RIGHT?
WELL...NOW...
HE'S GONNA BE SLEEPING HERE, TOO.
HE'LL READ YOU BEDTIME STORIES.
Bailey: THE PRINCESS AND THE TROLL.
AND HE'LL EAT BREAKFAST WITH US IN THE MORNING.
MAYBE HE'LL EVEN BRAID YOUR HAIR.
Bailey: YEAH.
BUT YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TEACH ME
HOW TO DO THAT.
WILL YOU DO THAT, NAT?
WILL YOU TEACH BAILEY HOW TO BRAID YOUR HAIR?
YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY.
GIVE US A MINUTE.
YEAH.
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
HEY!
DOESN'T ANYBODY ANSWER THE PHONE
IN THIS HOUSE?
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
AH...
(RING)
YEAH?
WHAT? NO, HE'S NOT HERE RIGHT NOW.
WHAT--
NO, I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HER.
WAIT A MINUTE. WHY?
NO, I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.
I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.
CLAUDIA!
CLAUDIA!
CLAUDIA!
YOUR SCHOOL JUST CALLED AND THEY SAID
THAT YOU WEREN'T THERE TODAY.
I WASN'T.
THAT'S IT? "I WASN'T"?
TURN THE MUSIC OFF!
NOW, YOU CAN'T JUST NOT GO TO SCHOOL.
YOU THINK I CAN JUST NOT GO TO WORK?
I TOOK A SAD DAY.
OK, REED AND I HAD A FIGHT.
REED? THAT'S WHAT THIS IS ABOUT?
BOY STUFF?!
THAT'S WHY YOU DIDN'T GO TO SCHOOL?
YOUR BROTHER IS SICK UP THERE,
AND YOUR SISTER IS BUSTIN' HER BUTT
AT WORK.
THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT?
YOU CAN'T BE THAT STUPID!
GRIFFIN!
THAT IS ENOUGH.
NO, IT'S NOT.
NO, IT'S NOT ENOUGH.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO, SEND HER TO HER ROOM?
MAKE HER CLEAN THE BATHROOM WITH A TOOTHBRUSH?
HIT HER? GOD, GRIFFIN, WHERE DOES THAT COME FROM?
YOU'RE YELLING AT ME, YOU'RE YELLING AT CLAUDIA.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE ANYMORE!
IT'S LIKE--
IT'S LIKE YOU'RE YOUR FATHER.
Charlie: WOULD YOU GUYS SHUT UP!
I'M MEDITATING!
CHARLIE?
NOT NOW, CLAUD.
CAN I JUST TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND?
NOT NOW. I'M MEDITATING.
HEY.
I GOT CHOCOLATE CREAM AND JELLY-FILLED
FOR BREAKFAST.
NOT NOW, BAILEY.
COME ON, MOMMY.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
COME IN.
HEY. YOU'RE UP.
AND YOU'RE OUT OF YOUR PAJAMAS.
WHAT'S THE OCCASION?
A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP.
I ACTUALLY FEEL...
ALMOST NORMAL.
AND LOOK.
NO MORE RASH.
I AM OFFICIALLY AMONGST THE RASH-FREE.
SO FOR ALL THOSE SKEPTICS OUT THERE
IN AMERICA,
INCLUDING YOU,
MEDITATION WORKS.
HUH. YOUR RASH IS GONE, AND IT WENT AWAY LAST NIGHT?
YEP.
I WONDER IF IT WAS THE DETERGENT.
EXCUSE ME?
I SWITCHED DETERGENTS.
THERE WAS A SALE.
BUT--WAIT A MINUTE.
MY RASH IS GONE. I'M NOT ITCHING ANYMORE.
YEAH, I KNOW,
BUT YESTERDAY I SWITCHED BACK.
(SIGHS)
JULIA...
I'M SORRY.
I'LL NEVER USE COUPONS AGAIN.
(WHISTLING)
I CALLED YOU LAST NIGHT.
I DIDN'T GET THE MESSAGE.
BECAUSE I HUNG UP.
LOOK, I KNOW YOU'RE--YOU'RE NOT
MY BOYFRIEND, AND...
I MEAN, I KNEW THAT, AND I DON'T CARE.
I MEAN I...
I DO CARE.
A LOT. BUT THAT'S...
THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M ASKING FOR.
CAN'T WE JUST TALK FOR A SECOND?
CLAUDIA...
LIKE WE USED TO. PLEASE?
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT?
ANYTHING.
SPORTS...
LIFE...
COULD YOU BELIEVE COREY ZIPPERSTEIN
IN ASSEMBLY THIS MORNING?
CLAUDIA, I CAN'T.
I MEAN--I MEAN, IT USED TO BE SO EASY
WITH YOU.
THAT WAS, LIKE, THE GREAT PART.
BUT NOW, I DON'T KNOW, YOU TAKE EVERYTHING WRONG.
WELL, I WON'T.
I WON'T. I MEAN, I'LL STOP DOING THAT.
I PROMISE.
I SAY YOUR CLOTHES LOOK NICE,
AND YOU THINK I'M YOUR BOYFRIEND.
I ASK ABOUT YOUR BROTHER, AND YOU THINK
I, LIKE, LOVE YOU.
I GOTTA GO WORK OUT.
YOU KNOW, I REALLY THOUGHT I'D DONE SOMETHING.
ME.
I FELT LIKE SOME KIND OF SUPERHERO, YOU KNOW?
CANCER MAN.
I THOUGHT I COULD GO INTO RADIATION TODAY
AND SAY,
"COME ON. NUKE ME.
I CAN TAKE IT. I'VE GOT THIS SUPER WEAPON."
WHAT AN AMAZING JERK I WAS.
CHARLIE...
MY RASH DIDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH
THE RADIATION.
IT WAS...JULIA AND... COUPONS.
SO?
WELL, FOR ONE SECOND
I FELT LIKE I HAD THE TINIEST BIT OF CONTROL.
I FELT LIKE THERE'S SOMETHING I CAN DO
TO BEAT THIS BACK, BUT...
KIRSTEN, WHAT IF I CAN'T?
WHAT IF YOU DID?
YOU HAD A RASH, CHARLIE.
AND NOW IT'S GONE.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
MAYBE IT WAS THE DETERGENT.
MAYBE IT WASN'T.
MAYBE IT WAS THE MEDITATION.
MAYBE IT WAS YOU.
YOU HOME?
I'M NOT LIKE MY FATHER, JULIA.
ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT THIS?
I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT ALL DAY.
I MEAN...YEAH, I BLEW UP.
YOU CALLED CLAUDIA STUPID.
SHE WAS ACTING LIKE A JERK!
I'M...
YOU KNOW, GRIFFIN, I REMEMBER ONCE
YOU CAME OVER...
AFTER YOUR DAD HAD, LIKE,
WHALED ON YOU.
GOD. YOU SLAMMED MY BEDROOM DOOR
AND KNOCKED A PICTURE OFF THE WALL.
AND YOU SAID,
"WHAT RIGHT DOES HE HAVE
TO MAKE US FEEL BAD
JUST BECAUSE HE HAD A ROTTEN DAY?"
THAT WAS TOTALLY DIFFERENT.
WHEN MY FATHER LOST IT, HE HAD NO REASON.
AND YOU DO?
YEAH, I DO, OK?
HOWIE TOOK BACK ALL OF HIS MONEY.
THEY REPOSSESSED MY COMPUTER. I'M GONNA LOSE
ALL OF MY CUSTOMERS.
YOU JUST DON'T GET IT.
NO.
GRIFFIN, THAT'S THE THING--
I DO.
I GET THAT YOU'RE IN WAY OVER YOUR HEAD.
THAT YOU'RE 19 YEARS OLD AND YOU FEEL LIKE
YOU'RE 40 OR SOMETHING.
AND EVERYBODY'S PUTTING DEMANDS ON YOU,
AND YOU'RE SCARED TO DEATH THAT YOU CAN'T HANDLE THEM.
AND THERE'S THIS...
ONE PERSON...
THIS PERSON WHO YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LOVE.
AND YOU WANT TO SAY TO THEM...
"FIX IT.
FIX EVERYTHING."
WELL, I FEEL EXACTLY THE SAME WAY.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I'M GOING INSIDE.
OWEN'S COMING DOWN WITH A COLD OR SOMETHING.
ARE YOU COMING WITH ME?
NO. I'M GONNA STAY HERE.
ONE OF US SHOULD GET SOME SLEEP.
HEY.
YOU'RE STILL DOING THIS MEDITATION THING, HUH?
YEAH, WELL...
YOU NEVER KNOW.
CHARLIE...
YEAH?
IT'S HELPING.
(TAKES DEEP BREATH)
DOES SHE KNOW I'M HERE?
I'M SURE SHE CAN HEAR YOU.
AND SHE'S STAYING IN HER ROOM.
WOW.
SHE'LL ADJUST, BAILEY.
I'M SURE OF IT.
IT'S JUST...
GONNA TAKE SOME TIME.
OK.
THEN WE GIVE HER TIME.
PRETTY AMAZING, ISN'T IT?
WE DID ALL THIS TO SPEND MORE TIME TOGETHER,
AND NOW...
RIGHT.
WELL, MAYBE I'LL SEE YOU AT THE MEETING
IN THE MORNING.
I CAN'T GO TILL THE AFTERNOON.
BUT MAYBE I'LL STOP BY THE RESTAURANT.
IT'S GONNA BE CRAZY THERE.
BUT IF I GET A BREAK DURING THE DAY,
I'LL GIVE YOU A CALL.
OK.
OK.
Annie: GOOD NIGHT.
IT'S DUMB.
NO, COME ON.
DO YOU--DO YOU WANT TO MAKE LOVE
ON THE BEACH LIKE...
FROM HERE TO ETERNITY OR...
IN A ROMANTIC MOUNTAIN CABIN
LIKE--WHAT WAS THAT MOVIE?
OK, OK.
MY FANTASY...
IS ONE NIGHT WITH YOU
ALONE, WITHOUT--
Nat: MOMMY!
(SIGHS)
YEAH.
NOT THAT I DON'T LOVE NAT.
MOMMY!
SHH! SHE'LL HEAR YOU.
AND THAT WOULD BE SO BAD BECAUSE...
WE'VE BEEN OVER THIS.
I'M COMING, HONEY!
MOMMY, I'M SCARED.
THERE'S A MONSTER IN MY ROOM.
NO, SWEETHEART, THERE ISN'T, OK?
COME ON, I'M GONNA SHOW YOU.
NO.
HONEY...
LOOK, WE--WE TALKED ABOUT THIS,
OK, SWEETHEART?
YOU'RE A BIG GIRL, AND--AND YOU
HAVE TO SLEEP
IN YOUR OWN ROOM.
READ TO ME?
OK. IN YOUR ROOM.
UH-UH. MY FAVORITE'S IN HERE.
OK. ONE STORY.
YES.
FROM THE BEGINNING. DON'T SKIP.
OK.
"ONCE UPON A TIME,
"THERE WAS A TROLL WHO LOVED A PRINCESS.
"SHE LIVED IN A CASTLE,
"HE LIVED IN A CAVE.
THE CAVE WAS DARK AND VERY, VERY SMALL."
WHO PUT THE ICE TRAY AWAY EMPTY?
CLIENT NUMBER 2282.
JULE, WE'RE OUT OF ICE.
SALINGER. JULIA SALINGER.
IS THERE SOME COFFEE MADE, JULE?
AND WHERE IS THAT ADDRESS, DOWNTOWN?
(WHISPERING) Hey, Jule...can I borrow
your earrings?
I'LL BE THERE. ABSOLUTELY. THANK YOU.
DOES ANYONE CARE THAT I WAS ON THE PHONE
WITH THE TEMP AGENCY GETTING A JOB?
I NEED SOMETHING COLD.
I GOT THIS RASH.
THAT'S DISGUSTING.
OK, I HAVE TO BE OUT OF HERE IN,
LIKE, 2 MINUTES.
OWEN, ARE YOU READY? I'M GONNA TAKE YOU
TO DAY CARE,
AND GRIFFIN'S GONNA PICK YOU UP.
WHERE'S HIS LUNCH BOX?
WAIT, HOLD ON A SECOND.
I CAN'T JUST CLOSE UP THE SHOP.
FOR, LIKE, 5 MINUTES. BRING HIM HOME.
CLAUDIA'LL BABY-SIT.
ARE YOU WEARING MAKEUP?
Griffin: I CAN'T.
WHAT IF A CUSTOMER COMES WHEN I'M CLOSED?
GRIFFIN, I CAN'T DO EVERYTHING.
CLAUD, ARE YOU TALLER?
ACTUALLY, I'M--
Julia: THOSE ARE MY BOOTS.
(SNIFFING) AND MY PERSUASION.
I WAS GONNA ASK.
RE THOSE MY EARRINGS?
YEAH.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
DO YOU LIKE 'EM?
YEAH, I LIKE 'EM. THEY'RE MINE.
TAKE 'EM OFF.
IT'S A RASH.
I KNOW THAT. I MEAN, I CAN SEE THAT,
BUT...
WHAT DOES IT MEAN? IS IT NORMAL?
THERE IS NO NORMAL.
EVERYBODY RESPONDS DIFFERENTLY
TO RADIATION.
I KNOW. AND MY BODY RESPONDS WITH NAUSEA,
FATIGUE, AND MOUTH SORES,
BUT THIS IS-- THIS IS A RASH.
I MEAN, YOU GOTTA BE ABLE TO GIVE ME
SOMETHING FOR THIS.
DID YOU TRY THE CORTISONE?
IT DIDN'T WORK.
I'M STILL ITCHING.
CHARLIE, I KNOW IT'S UNCOMFORTABLE--
IT'S NOT THAT. IT'S JUST...
I MEAN, IT'S...
THIS IS JUST A RASH.
YOU'VE GOTTA BE ABLE TO GIVE ME
SOMETHING FOR THIS.
CHARLIE...
I UNDERSTAND YOU'RE FRUSTRATED,
BUT EVERYTHING TAKES TIME.
CALL ME IF YOU NEED ANYTHING.
Annie, on phone: OK, TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT.
FOR WHAT?
I DEFINITELY SAID 12 POUNDS TUNA,
12 POUNDS SALMON.
THIS IS ALL SALMON.
WHAT YOU WANTED. A WHOLE NIGHT.
YOU, ME, ALONE.
NATALIE BEGGED TO SLEEP AT MELISSA'S,
AND I USUALLY DON'T ALLOW SLEEP-OVERS
ON THE WEEKDAYS,
BUT I DECIDED TO MAKE AN EXCEPTION.
AN EXCEPTION. WELL, THAT'S GREAT,
BUT--HEY!
DON'T YOU THINK WE SHOULD'VE TALKED
ABOUT THIS FIRST?
THEY DON'T PAY ME TO TALK. THEY
PAY ME TO DELIVER.
NOT YOU. MY GIRLFRIEND.
I THOUGHT YOU'D BE HAPPY.
I AM HAPPY.
GOOD. I'M LEAVING.
WAIT.
I WENT SHOPPING. I BOUGHT ALL
YOUR FAVORITE FOOD.
ORDER SAYS SALMON.
YEAH, WELL, THAT WAS A MISTAKE.
OBVIOUSLY.
NOT YOU. THE DELIVERY GUY.
LOOK, ANNIE, ALL I'M SAYING IS,
IF YOU HAD ASKED ME,
I WOULD'VE TOLD YOU I HAVE TO WORK
ALL NIGHT TONIGHT.
I KNOW. BUT YOU HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL ALL DAY.
AND YOU THINK I LIKE THAT?
DON'T YOU THINK I'D RATHER BE HOME
WITH YOU--
WAIT A SECOND! CALL
MY DISPATCHER.
I WAS JUST HOPING-- I CAN'T.
NUMBER'S ON THE INVOICE.
BUT YOU SAID-- I GOTTA GO.
BAILEY! I GOTTA GO!
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH 25 POUNDS OF SALMON?
REED?
LOOK, BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING,
UH...
I'M SORRY.
REALLY, REALLY, REALLY SORRY.
IT'S OK, SALINGER.
NO, IT'S NOT.
NO, IT'S NOT. I MEAN, WHAT I DID
TO YOU THE OTHER DAY,
SCREAMING AT YOU LIKE THAT,
IT WAS INCREDIBLY, UH,
I DON'T KNOW, NOT LIKE ME.
NOT LIKE ME AT ALL.
I KNOW. JUST BETWEEN YOU
AND CHARLIE
AND EVERYTHING THAT'S GOING ON
AT HOME RIGHT NOW,
I GUESS I...
I DON'T KNOW. I JUST--I--I FREAKED!
IT'S OK, SALINGER.
IT IS?
I GET IT.
WOW. THAT IS, LIKE, SO...
SO UNDERSTANDING.
FORGET ABOUT IT, HUH?
I HAVE.
HEY, SALINGER, DID YOU, LIKE,
DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT
TO YOUR HAIR?
WELL, I...
I CURLED IT BACK.
WELL, IT LOOKS NICE.
OH...
CLAUDIA, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?
RIGHT HERE!
OWEN, OWEN, GET OVER HERE!
CLAUDIA, I CAN'T HAVE OWEN DOWN HERE.
I WENT HOME, AND YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO BABY-SIT--OWEN?
OWEN!
OWEN! OWEN!
OWEN, WATCH IT NOW. WATCH IT.
UHH! GOSH...
THAT YOUR SON?
WHAT? OH, NO. NO.
HE'S MY BROTHER-IN-LAW.
OWEN, COME HERE.
MEET MAC. MAC'S A SUPPLIER.
HE GIVES US SUPPLIES FOR THE SHOP.
GIVING ISN'T EXACTLY THE IDEA.
UH...
RIGHT. SORRY.
POOR CHOICE OF WORDS.
YOUR CHECK BOUNCED. AGAIN.
WHA--UH...
OWEN, NO!
HEY, HEY, HEY, COME HERE.
YOU KNOW, YOU OWE ME FOR 3 MONTHS.
I WANT PAYMENT IN FULL, IN CASH,
BY FRIDAY, OR I TAKE THAT COMPUTER BACK.
NO, WAIT, COME ON. THERE'S GOT TO BE
ANOTHER WAY
FOR US TO WORK THIS OUT.
ALL RIGHT? ALL RIGHT, YOU TAKE THE COMPUTER,
IT'S GONNA TAKE ME, LIKE...
TWICE...3 TIMES AS LONG TO GET
ALL THIS WORK DONE.
ALL RIGHT?
LOOK, SEE MY SIGN OVER THERE? IT SAYS,
"OVERNIGHT SERVICE."
THAT'S WHY PEOPLE COME HERE.
BECAUSE I'M FAST.
RIGHT? IF I'M NOT FAST, THEY'RE NOT GONNA COME.
IF THEY DON'T COME, I DON'T GET MY MONEY.
IF I DON'T GET MY MONEY, THEN I'M NEVER GONNA BE ABLE
TO GIVE YOU WHAT I OWE YOU.
FRIDAY.
UH...
WHOA!
WHOA!
OWEN!
IF PAUL SAW ME AT AN HERBALIST,
HE'D FILE FOR DIVORCE.
DOCTORS ALL THINK
IT'S SOME KIND OF VOODOO OR SOMETHING.
CHARLIE SALINGER.
DR. FONG.
UH, DO I CALL YOU DOCTOR?
YOU SHOULD KNOW I'M NOT REALLY
A FIRM BELIEVER IN THIS STUFF.
I MEAN, I WANT TO BELIEVE--
SHOW ME YOUR TONGUE.
HMM.
YOU HAVE HODGKIN'S DISEASE.
WOW! THAT'S INCREDIBLE.
IT TOOK MY DOCTORS WEEKS AND ABOUT A MILLION TESTS
TO FIGURE THAT OUT,
AND THEY STILL MISSED IT THE FIRST TIME.
YOU ALSO HAVE A RASH.
YES. THAT'S AMAZING! HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?
LITTLE BUMPS ON YOUR NECK.
OH.
RADIATION, CORRECT?
YEAH.
HMM...
YOU EXPOSE YOURSELF TO INORGANIC RAYS
AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT,
WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?
OF COURSE YOU'LL HAVE A REACTION.
WESTERN MEDICINE.
THEY'LL POISON YOUR BODY IN ORDER TO CURE IT.
TRY THIS...
AND THIS...
AND THESE.
THESE ARE ACTUALLY GONNA HELP ME?
THEY'LL HELP YOUR RASH.
(UNSCREWS JAR)
FIRST THINGS FIRST.
NO, I'M NOT KIDDING. I WANT 3 SALMON SPECIALS--
POACHED, MOUSSE, AND... I DON'T CARE. SUSHI.
BAILEY, IT'S ANNIE.
I'LL CALL HER BACK.
NOT ON THE PHONE. HERE.
I KNOW, I KNOW. YOU'RE CRAZED.
I JUST WANTED TO COME BY HERE
AND THEN...
WHEN YOU HAVE 5 MINUTES
OF DOWN TIME--
BAILEY, WE'RE WAY OVERBOOKED AT 6:00.
I'M NOT GONNA HAVE ANY DOWN TIME.
TONIGHT'S NOT GONNA WORK.
BUT...NATALIE'S GONNA BE HOME
TOMORROW.
WELL, THAT'S FINE.
THEN TOMORROW I'LL COME BY AND
WE'LL SIT NAT DOWN
AND WE'LL FINALLY TELL HER--
NO.
I TOLD YOU, I DON'T WANT TO
TELL NAT ABOUT US.
NOT YET.
WELL, THEN WHAT?
WE KEEP SNEAKING AROUND?
2 HOURS UNDER YOUR BED, I COULD BARELY MOVE MY NECK.
OH, WELL! YOU KNOW WHAT?
THERE'S A REASON FOR ME TO CHANGE
MY WHOLE PARENTING PHILOSOPHY.
ANNIE,
WE'RE TOGETHER.
I WANT TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD
WE'RE TOGETHER.
WHY CAN'T YOU TELL NAT?
'CAUSE...SHE'S NOT THE WHOLE WORLD.
OK? SHE'S MY DAUGHTER.
AND SHE'S ONLY 7 YEARS OLD,
AND I AM NOT GONNA TURN HER WHOLE LIFE
UPSIDE DOWN
BECAUSE WE WANT TO SLEEP TOGETHER!
NOW, LOOK.
BAILEY,
NATALIE BELIEVES
MOMMIES SLEEP WITH DADDIES.
WHAT'S SHE GONNA THINK WHEN SHE WAKES UP
AND SHE SEES YOU THERE IN THE MORNING?
YOU'RE HER NEW DADDY?
AND IS THIS A GOOD THING,
OR ARE YOU GONNA BE EXACTLY
LIKE HER REAL DADDY
AND JUST LEAVE?
NO. I'M NOT GONNA LEAVE.
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
I MEAN...
WE'VE ONLY BEEN SEEING EACH OTHER
FOR, LIKE, 3 MONTHS.
CAN YOU BE ABSOLUTELY SURE?
I HAVE TO BE CAREFUL WHAT I PROMISE
MY DAUGHTER.
DAMN! DAMN, DAMN!
YOU OWE ME MONEY!
OWEN, WHAT?
IT'S 7:30. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
I'VE BEEN WORKING. WHERE DO YOU THINK?
WHAT IS OWEN YELLING?
"DAMN, YOU OWE ME MONEY, DAMN."
'CAUSE HE'S BEEN AT THE SHOP
WITH ME ALL DAY.
THE SHOP? WITH ALL THAT STUFF THAT'S
TOXIC AND DANGEROUS?
WELL, BEATS LEAVING HIM HERE ALONE.
CLAUDIA!
HEY, I NEVER SAID I'D BABY-SIT.
DAMN! DAMN!
OWEN, STOP IT.
LOOK, HE'S COVERED IN GREASE.
DID YOU EVEN THINK OF GIVING HIM
A BATH?
THAT'S MY JOB, TOO?
HEY, I WAS WORKING!
YEAH? WELL, I SHOULD'VE BEEN WORKING,
NOT HERE WATCHING YOUR LITTLE BROTHER!
HAS HE EATEN YET?
I DON'T KNOW. DID YOU BRING HOME
SOME DINNER?
THERE'S CHICKEN IN THE FRIDGE.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, COOK IT?
YES.
WELL, I--NO!
THAT'S NOT THE WAY IT WORKS, ALL RIGHT?
I'M WORKING ALL DAY.
I'M NOT COMING HOME TO COOKING AND CLEANING
AND SCREAMING KIDS!
DAMN! YOU OWE ME MONEY. DAMN!
I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE. I'M GOING BACK TO THE SHOP.
Julia: OWEN, ARE YOU--
GOD! WHAT IS THAT SMELL?
IT'S DR. FONG'S HERBAL TEA.
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.
EW!
HAS ANYBODY SEEN MY BAG? YUCK!
OH!
ROTTEN EGGS!
CHARLIE'S TEA, AND APPARENTLY
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.
PLUS IT'S GONNA HELP ME GET RID OF THIS RASH,
SO YOU CAN BOTH JUST SPARE ME
THE EDITORIAL COMMENT.
WHAT IS IN THIS, ANYWAY?
"WATER BUFFALO GALLSTONES, DRIED HUMAN PLACENTA..."
OH. WHERE'S THE EYE OF NEWT?
VERY FUNNY.
NO OFFENSE, CHARLIE, BUT I THINK THIS IS
A LOAD OF CRAP.
"COW DUNG."
NO. (SNIFFING)
IT'S IN MY CLOTHES.
I GOTTA CHANGE.
P. U.!
LOOK, YOU GUYS, IT'S NOT THAT BAD,
SO JUST OPEN A WINDOW OR BUY SOME AIR FRESHENER
OR SOMETHING. I DON'T CARE.
I'M DRINKING THIS.
COME ON, OWEN, TIME TO GET YOU
DRESSED.
THAT IS REALLY GROSS.
ANNIE.
ANNIE?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
BRUSHING MY TEETH.
IS THIS LIKE ONE OF THOSE TOOTHPASTE COMMERCIALS
WHERE...THE GIRL JUMPS OUT OF BED
AND QUICKLY BRUSHES HER TEETH
SO SHE CAN JUMP BACK IN BED AND KISS
HER BOYFRIEND
WITH A MINTY-FRESH MOUTH?
NO. THIS IS LIKE REAL LIFE,
WHERE THE GIRL JUMPS OUT OF BED
TO START HER DAY.
WHY?
I MEAN, I DIDN'T EVEN GET HERE TILL, LIKE,
3:00 IN THE MORNING.
3:15.
ISN'T MELISSA'S MOM TAKING NAT
STRAIGHT TO SCHOOL?
THAT'S THE PLAN.
WELL?
I DON'T HAVE TO BE AT SCHOOL
TILL, LIKE, 9:30.
BAILEY...
WHAT?
I HAVE THINGS TO DO.
WHAT COULD BE MORE IMPORTANT
THAN THIS?
WE COULD HANG OUT IN BED FOR A WHILE...
MAYBE MAKE SOME COFFEE...
I MAKE A MEAN DENVER OMELET.
WILL YOU PUT CHEESE IN IT?
AND TOMATOES AND PEPPERS...
ANY WAY YOU LIKE IT.
ALL RIGHT.
LET ME MAKE A CALL.
(CLANKING)
YOU'RE LEAVING WITHOUT EVEN
SAYING GOOD-BYE?
I GOTTA GO TO WORK.
BUT YOU WERE THERE UNTIL 1:00--1:00
IN THE MORNING.
I HAD A LOT OF STUFF TO DO.
I TRIED TO WAIT UP, BUT, UM...
YOU'RE NEVER SUPPOSED TO GO TO BED MAD.
YOU KNOW THAT?
MY MOM USED TO TELL ME THAT.
ONE MORNING I CAME DOWNSTAIRS,
AND THERE WAS COFFEE BURNING ON THE STOVE,
THE TV WAS ON,
MY PARENTS WERE ASLEEP ON THE KITCHEN TABLE.
I DON'T KNOW IF THEY EVER WORKED
THAT ONE OUT, BUT...
THEY TRIED.
(TAKES DEEP BREATH)
I'M NOT MAD, JULE.
(TAKES DEEP BREATH)
THEN WHAT?
OH, I DON'T KNOW. I...
I'M--I'M FRUSTRATED.
IT'S LIKE I COME HOME FROM WORK
AND IT'S LIKE I'VE HAD THIS TERRIBLE DAY
AND BUSINESS SUCKS
AND I WANT TO TELL YOU EVERYTHING.
I REALLY DO.
BUT IT'S EITHER...
OWEN'S CRYING OR CHARLIE'S THROWING UP
OR CLAUDIA'S--
WHO KNOWS WHAT SHE'S DOING?
I KNOW IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT...
AND I KNOW YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS, TOO,
BUT...
I DON'T KNOW. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?
IT'S LIKE ONE SECOND AGO, WE COULDN'T KEEP OUR HANDS
OFF EACH OTHER.
I MEAN, GOD! WE MADE LOVE UNDER THAT TREE!
SHH!
NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT THAT.
IT'S LIKE, NOW WE'RE LIKE THIS OLD MARRIED COUPLE,
BARELY TALKING...
SNIPING AT EACH OTHER ALL THE TIME.
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
NEVER GO TO SLEEP ANGRY.
(GIRLS LAUGHING)
Girl: "DEAR REED, I'M SO HAPPY
WE'RE BACK TOGETHER."
1, 2, 3, 4, 5 EXCLAMATION POINTS.
OH, GOD.
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO WITHOUT YOU."
UNDERLINED.
HEY!
THIS IS HYSTERICAL!
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?
NOTHING.
OH, WAIT. IS THIS--
THAT LETTER'S NOT FOR YOU. THAT'S REED'S LOCKER.
UH, NOT ANYMORE. HE ASKED ME TO
TRADE WITH HIM.
(LAUGHING)
MAYBE HE WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM YOU.
UH, "SA...
SAL--"
SALINGER.
HA!
IT IS YOU.
LEAVE HER ALONE.
HI, REED.
JUST LEAVE HER ALONE.
BROUGHT YOU SOMETHING.
I FOUND IT AT THIS AMAZING BOOKSTORE
IN BERKELEY.
THEY'VE GOT ALL THIS GREAT STUFF
ON ACUPUNCTURE AND MEDITATION.
THANKS.
YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING YOUR TEA?
3 TIMES YESTERDAY AND TWICE TODAY,
JUST LIKE "THE DOCTOR" ORDERED,
AND I'M STILL ITCHING.
REMEMBER THAT CAMPING TRIP
WE TOOK TO YELLOWSTONE
AND YOU WANTED TO GO HOME BECAUSE
OF ALL THE MOSQUITOES?
I TOLD YOU YOU SHOULD'VE
BROUGHT THE NET.
YEAH. WELL, IT'S EXACTLY LIKE THAT,
ONLY ABOUT A MILLION TIMES WORSE.
I'LL GET YOU SOME ICE.
DON'T BOTHER. IT DOESN'T HELP.
NOTHING HELPS. IT'S LIKE...
A HORROR MOVIE.
LIKE INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS
OR SOMETHING.
I JUST GOTTA SIT HERE
WHILE THIS THING
I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO CONTROL OVER
EATS AT ME.
CHARLIE, COME ON.
I MEAN, I KNOW YOU'RE UPSET, BUT...
WE'RE TALKING ABOUT A RASH.
IT'S NOT JUST A RASH, OK?
IT'S NOT JUST A RASH.
I MEAN...
WHAT DID I EXPECT, ANYWAY?
LIKE HERBS CAN CURE ANYTHING.
WHAT ARE THEY?
NOTHING. POWDER.
YOU KNOW, AS LONG AS WE'RE
TALKING ABOUT IT,
WHAT'S RADIATION?
LIGHT.
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?
WHAT IF IT'S ALL VOODOO?
WHAT IF NONE OF IT WORKS?
THAT'D REALLY BE SOMETHING, HUH?
JULIA.
OH. UM...I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND.
I USED MY KEY.
OH. NO, NO.
DEFINITELY NOT.
THE TEMP AGENCY DIDN'T HAVE ANY WORK
FOR ME TODAY,
SO I THOUGHT I'D, YOU KNOW,
HELP OUT HERE WITH THE...
BOOKS OR SOMETHING.
THEN I, UH...
STARTED PAYING THE BILLS,
BUT...
THERE'S NOT A LOT OF MONEY HERE.
UH, YEAH. UM...
DON'T--DON'T WORRY, BECAUSE...
LAST NIGHT, I WORKED IT
ALL OUT. LOOK.
THE MONEY THAT I'M HOLDING FOR HOWIE,
IT'S MAKING, LIKE, 5% INTEREST, RIGHT?
UH-HUH. SO IF I TAKE THAT
OUT OF THE BANK--
HOWIE'S MONEY? YEAH. JUST FOR
A COUPLE OF DAYS.
I CAN PAY OFF MY COMPUTER
AND TAKE CARE OF ALL THESE JOBS.
GRIFFIN-- I'LL HAVE THE MONEY
BACK IN THE BANK
BEFORE HOWIE EVEN KNOWS IT'S GONE.
AND WHAT IF YOU CAN'T?
SEE, I'VE GOT, LIKE, 10 JOB ORDERS
LINED UP.
IT--IT'S NOT YOUR MONEY, GRIFFIN.
GOD, IT'S HOWIE'S, AND YOU DON'T EVEN
KNOW WHERE HE GOT IT.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT KIND OF BUSINESS
HE'S IN.
I TOLD YOU, I'LL PAY IT BACK.
HE WON'T EVEN KNOW IT'S GONE.
AND WHAT IF HE DOES? HAVE YOU THOUGHT
ABOUT THAT?
HE BEAT YOU UP ON YOUR WEDDING DAY.
WHAT IS HE GONNA DO NEXT?
I CAN HANDLE THIS.
OBVIOUSLY YOU CAN'T!
THERE IS, LIKE, NO MONEY HERE!
YOU'RE NOT SLEEPING, AND YOU'RE BARELY EATING.
AND NOW YOU'RE COMING UP WITH SCHEMES TO STEAL
STOLEN MONEY?
IT'S NOT A SCHEME! IT'S A PLAN!
A BAD PLAN,
A PLAN THAT'S GONNA MAKE THINGS WORSE.
THAT'S YOUR DAMN OPINION,
JULIA.
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T NEED IT.
YOU KNOW, Y-YOU'RE MY WIFE.
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SUPPORT ME.
IF YOU CAN'T DO THAT,
THEN DO ME A FAVOR. STAY HOME!
ALL RIGHT? DID YOU HEAR ME?
JUST GO HOME.
HEY.
WHOA!
TOO BAD I GOT TO GET TO WORK.
YOU LOOK GREAT.
A LOT OF GOOD IT DID ME. HE WOULDN'T EVEN SEE ME.
WHO?
THE GUY FROM THE INSURANCE COMPANY.
I MEAN, I GOT ALL DRESSED UP AND WENT
ALL THE WAY DOWNTOWN,
AND THEN THE RECEPTIONIST...
THE RECEPTIONIST--
SAYS TO ME, "I'M SORRY, MISS MOTT,
BUT THE POSITION'S BEEN FILLED."
WAIT A MINUTE...
YOU HAD A JOB INTERVIEW?
I MEAN, SO WHAT IF I RESCHEDULED IT
FOR A FEW HOURS?
I MEAN, HE COULD'VE AT LEAST WAITED--
HOLD ON. YOU RESCHEDULED
AN INTERVIEW?
THIS MORNING. I TOLD YOU THAT.
WHEN YOU WANTED TO STAY IN BED,
I TOLD YOU THAT I HAD THINGS TO DO.
"THINGS."
"THINGS" ARE LIKE...
SHOPPING...
OR GETTING YOUR CAR WASHED.
"THINGS" ARE NOT JOB INTERVIEWS.
I CALLED AND I CHANGED IT
FROM 10:00 TO 4:00.
I MEAN, WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?
THE BIG DEAL... IS THAT AT 10:00
THERE WAS A JOB,
AND AT 4:00 THERE WASN'T.
WELL, HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?
IT DOESN'T MATTER.
YOU NEED A JOB, YOU DON'T RESCHEDULE
AN INTERVIEW.
YEAH, BUT I DID THIS FOR YOU!
WELL, DON'T.
DON'T DO THAT.
YOU SHOULDN'T DO STUFF LIKE THAT
FOR ME.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE.
ONE SECOND, YOU'RE SAYING
WE'RE NEVER ALONE TOGETHER,
SO I, LIKE, TWIST MYSELF INTO A PRETZEL
TRYING TO FIND SOME TIME FOR US TO BE ALONE,
BUT THAT'S WRONG, TOO.
YOU KNOW, I CAN'T WIN WITH YOU.
THAT WAS REALLY NICE, WHAT YOU DID FOR ME.
I MEAN, STICKING UP FOR ME LIKE THAT.
NO ONE EVER DOES THAT.
IT'S NO BIG DEAL.
WELL, MAYBE FOR YOU, BUT...
TO ME, IT...
MEANT A LOT.
LOOK, SALINGER--
I LOVE WHEN YOU CALL ME THAT.
I READ YOUR LETTER.
GOOD.
GOOD. I MEAN, I WROTE IT TO YOU.
LISTEN. SOMEHOW--
AND I DON'T KNOW HOW, BUT--
YOU'VE GOT, LIKE, THE WRONG IDEA.
WE'RE NOT TOGETHER.
BUT I THOUGHT...
WELL, I MEAN, I THOUGHT YOU SAID
THAT YOU FORGAVE ME.
I DID.
THAT STILL DOESN'T MEAN...
I'M NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND,
CLAUDIA.
I TOLD YOU THAT BEFORE.
I MEAN... I LIKE YOU A LOT,
AND WE'RE FRIENDS--
WELL, SURE, NOW, 'CAUSE...
I MEAN, YOU'RE JUST NOT--
YOU'RE JUST NOT THINKING ABOUT IT
IN THE RIGHT WAY.
LOOK AT JANE EYRE AND...
AND ROCHESTER.
I MEAN, HE THOUGHT OF HER AS A GOVERNESS
FOR, LIKE-- FOR, LIKE CHAPTERS...
AND SHE TURNED OUT TO BE THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE.
CLAUDIA, THAT'S A NOVEL.
IT'S FICTION.
DID YOU REALLY ASK THAT GIRL
TO TRADE LOCKERS WITH YOU?
I'M SORRY.
(PLATES AND SILVERWARE CLATTERING)
OWEN, STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR FOOD.
OWEN!
OH, MAN...
YEAH. CLIENT 2282. SALINGER. JULIA SALINGER.
I'M NOT GOING TO SCHOOL.
WHERE? THE RICHMOND
DISTRICT?
I SAID I'M NOT GOING TO SCHOOL.
OK. I'LL BE THERE. THANKS.
FINE. DON'T GO TO SCHOOL.
DON'T YOU EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHY?
CLAUDIA, IT'S FINE. JUST BE HOME WHEN
OWEN GETS HERE, OK?
WHERE ARE MY KEYS? HAVE YOU SEEN
MY KEYS?
CHARLIE, I'M--
WHATEVER IT IS, TALK TO JULIA.
(SIGHS)
I COULDN'T SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
I KEPT THINKING ABOUT...
EVERYTHING.
I WANT TO TELL NAT ABOUT US.
WAIT A MINUTE.
THE WAY I'VE BEEN ACTING,
MAKING EXCUSES, BLAMING OTHER PEOPLE...
IT'S LIKE MY OLD ROUTINES.
YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE I'M DRINKING AGAIN.
DON'T DO THIS, ANNIE.
NO. I HAVE TO.
I MEAN, HIDING YOU UNDER MY BED.
THAT'S WHERE I USED TO HIDE MY BOTTLES.
WE JUST TALKED ABOUT THIS...
2 DAYS AGO,
AND YOU HAD, LIKE, A HUNDRED REASONS WHY
IT WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA.
I WAS WRONG.
ARE YOU DOING THIS FOR ME? BECAUSE--
I'M NOT.
I MEAN, WHAT IS THE WHOLE A.A. THING?
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR CHOICES.
DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES.
THAT'S WHY I'M DOING THIS.
I HAVE TO BE STRAIGHT WITH NAT.
OK.
CHARLIE?
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
CHARLIE?
WAIT. I MUST BE IN THE WRONG HOUSE.
IS THAT...CHARLIE SALINGER MEDITATING?
(LAUGHS)
(LAUGHS)
IT'S, JUST, YOU NEVER STRUCK ME
AS THE TYPE.
I PROBABLY NEVER STRUCK YOU AS THE CANCER TYPE EITHER,
BUT...THERE IT IS.
IS IT HELPING?
WHO KNOWS?
I MEAN, IT'S-- IT'S WEIRD.
THEY TELL YOU TO MAKE UP A MANTRA.
YOU KNOW, SOMETHING TO CLEAR
YOUR HEAD, AND...
AND ALL I KEEP THINKING IS, GOD,
I HOPE THIS WORKS.
GOD, I HOPE THIS WORKS.
NOT EXACTLY STRESS-RELIEVING, HUH?
YEAH, BUT IT'S SOMETHING.
I'M DOING SOMETHING.
I READ THIS ARTICLE THIS MORNING,
AND THEY FOUND SOME PLANT IN MEXICO
THAT CURES CANCER IN MICE.
AND I'M THINKING, SHOULD I GET ON A PLANE?
DOES IT JUST CURE MICE?
DO THEY HAVE TO BE MEXICAN MICE?
I MEAN, I SWEAR, IF SOMEONE TOLD ME
THAT SWINGING A BLACK CAT OVER MY HEAD
3 TIMES RIGHT NOW
WOULD CURE THIS THING, I'D BE, LIKE,
GET ME A BLACK CAT.
(SIGHS)
OH, MAN.
I'VE REALLY LOST IT, HAVEN'T I?
WHAT AM I THINKING?
PLANTS IN MEXICO,
MEDITATING...
I DON'T KNOW.
BUT SINCE WE'VE BEEN TALKING...
YOU HAVEN'T BEEN SCRATCHING.
YEAH, I, UH... JUST HAVE TO RETARD
THE SPARK A FEW DEGREES,
BUT I CAN HAVE IT BACK TO YOU TOMORROW.
THAT QUICK?
YEAH, YEAH. THANKS TO THIS BABY.
SHE SAVES YOU MONEY 'CAUSE SHE SAVES ME TIME.
SEE YOU.
PLACE LOOKS GOOD, KID.
YOU GOT CUSTOMERS, TECHNOLOGY,
ALMOST LIKE A REGULAR BUSINESS.
WHAT DO YOU WANT, HOWIE?
WHAT? CAN'T AN OLD FRIEND
JUST STOP BY
TO SAY HEY TO A PAL? DO I ALWAYS
HAVE TO WANT SOMETHING?
HEY. WRITE ME A CHECK, HUH?
WHAT?
OUT OF OUR ACCOUNT.
SAY, 8 GRAND?
8 GRAND?
WHAT--THAT'LL LEAVE THE ACCOUNT
AT PRACTICALLY ZERO.
YEAH?
WELL, IT'LL CLEAN US OUT.
YEAH?
WE WON'T HAVE ANYTHING LEFT!
WE?
IT'S MY MONEY.
WRITE THE CHECK.
THANKS.
HEY. I'LL CALL YOU.
UH, YEAH, HI.
THIS IS GRIFFIN HOLBROOK.
YEAH.
WHAT?
OH, NO, NO. ACCOUNT TRANSFERS.
UH--WHAT?
OH, HOLD-- HOLD ON. UH--
IT'S ACCOUNT NUMBER 009481.
YEAH, YEAH. I REQUESTED A TRANSFER--
A $10,000 TRANSFER THIS MORNING BETWEEN ACCOUNTS.
WAIT--YEAH--NO, I NEED TO CANCEL.
I THOUGHT ABOUT TELLING HER
THAT SHE WOULD BE DOUBLY SAFE
HAVING 2 GROWNUPS SLEEPING HERE,
YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE SHE'S AFRAID
OF MONSTERS.
BUT THAT JUST IMPLIES THAT SHE'S ONLY
HALF AS SAFE
WHEN YOU'RE NOT HERE, SO--
WAIT--WAIT A MINUTE.
I THOUGHT THE WHOLE IDEA
WAS TO BE HONEST.
COME ON.
NAT?
BAILEY AND I HAVE SOMETHING WE WANT TO TELL YOU.
WANT TO SEE MY PICTURE? IT'S BAILEY.
HEY. YOU MADE ME TALL.
THANKS.
NAT, HONEY,
FROM NOW ON, BAILEY'S GONNA SPEND
A LOT MORE TIME WITH US.
HE ALREADY EATS DINNER WITH US SOMETIMES.
YOU LIKE THAT, RIGHT?
WELL...NOW...
HE'S GONNA BE SLEEPING HERE, TOO.
HE'LL READ YOU BEDTIME STORIES.
Bailey: THE PRINCESS AND THE TROLL.
AND HE'LL EAT BREAKFAST WITH US IN THE MORNING.
MAYBE HE'LL EVEN BRAID YOUR HAIR.
Bailey: YEAH.
BUT YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TEACH ME
HOW TO DO THAT.
WILL YOU DO THAT, NAT?
WILL YOU TEACH BAILEY HOW TO BRAID YOUR HAIR?
YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY.
GIVE US A MINUTE.
YEAH.
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
HEY!
DOESN'T ANYBODY ANSWER THE PHONE
IN THIS HOUSE?
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
AH...
(RING)
YEAH?
WHAT? NO, HE'S NOT HERE RIGHT NOW.
WHAT--
NO, I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HER.
WAIT A MINUTE. WHY?
NO, I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.
I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.
CLAUDIA!
CLAUDIA!
CLAUDIA!
YOUR SCHOOL JUST CALLED AND THEY SAID
THAT YOU WEREN'T THERE TODAY.
I WASN'T.
THAT'S IT? "I WASN'T"?
TURN THE MUSIC OFF!
NOW, YOU CAN'T JUST NOT GO TO SCHOOL.
YOU THINK I CAN JUST NOT GO TO WORK?
I TOOK A SAD DAY.
OK, REED AND I HAD A FIGHT.
REED? THAT'S WHAT THIS IS ABOUT?
BOY STUFF?!
THAT'S WHY YOU DIDN'T GO TO SCHOOL?
YOUR BROTHER IS SICK UP THERE,
AND YOUR SISTER IS BUSTIN' HER BUTT
AT WORK.
THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT?
YOU CAN'T BE THAT STUPID!
GRIFFIN!
THAT IS ENOUGH.
NO, IT'S NOT.
NO, IT'S NOT ENOUGH.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO, SEND HER TO HER ROOM?
MAKE HER CLEAN THE BATHROOM WITH A TOOTHBRUSH?
HIT HER? GOD, GRIFFIN, WHERE DOES THAT COME FROM?
YOU'RE YELLING AT ME, YOU'RE YELLING AT CLAUDIA.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE ANYMORE!
IT'S LIKE--
IT'S LIKE YOU'RE YOUR FATHER.
Charlie: WOULD YOU GUYS SHUT UP!
I'M MEDITATING!
CHARLIE?
NOT NOW, CLAUD.
CAN I JUST TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND?
NOT NOW. I'M MEDITATING.
HEY.
I GOT CHOCOLATE CREAM AND JELLY-FILLED
FOR BREAKFAST.
NOT NOW, BAILEY.
COME ON, MOMMY.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
COME IN.
HEY. YOU'RE UP.
AND YOU'RE OUT OF YOUR PAJAMAS.
WHAT'S THE OCCASION?
A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP.
I ACTUALLY FEEL...
ALMOST NORMAL.
AND LOOK.
NO MORE RASH.
I AM OFFICIALLY AMONGST THE RASH-FREE.
SO FOR ALL THOSE SKEPTICS OUT THERE
IN AMERICA,
INCLUDING YOU,
MEDITATION WORKS.
HUH. YOUR RASH IS GONE, AND IT WENT AWAY LAST NIGHT?
YEP.
I WONDER IF IT WAS THE DETERGENT.
EXCUSE ME?
I SWITCHED DETERGENTS.
THERE WAS A SALE.
BUT--WAIT A MINUTE.
MY RASH IS GONE. I'M NOT ITCHING ANYMORE.
YEAH, I KNOW,
BUT YESTERDAY I SWITCHED BACK.
(SIGHS)
JULIA...
I'M SORRY.
I'LL NEVER USE COUPONS AGAIN.
(WHISTLING)
I CALLED YOU LAST NIGHT.
I DIDN'T GET THE MESSAGE.
BECAUSE I HUNG UP.
LOOK, I KNOW YOU'RE--YOU'RE NOT
MY BOYFRIEND, AND...
I MEAN, I KNEW THAT, AND I DON'T CARE.
I MEAN I...
I DO CARE.
A LOT. BUT THAT'S...
THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M ASKING FOR.
CAN'T WE JUST TALK FOR A SECOND?
CLAUDIA...
LIKE WE USED TO. PLEASE?
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT?
ANYTHING.
SPORTS...
LIFE...
COULD YOU BELIEVE COREY ZIPPERSTEIN
IN ASSEMBLY THIS MORNING?
CLAUDIA, I CAN'T.
I MEAN--I MEAN, IT USED TO BE SO EASY
WITH YOU.
THAT WAS, LIKE, THE GREAT PART.
BUT NOW, I DON'T KNOW, YOU TAKE EVERYTHING WRONG.
WELL, I WON'T.
I WON'T. I MEAN, I'LL STOP DOING THAT.
I PROMISE.
I SAY YOUR CLOTHES LOOK NICE,
AND YOU THINK I'M YOUR BOYFRIEND.
I ASK ABOUT YOUR BROTHER, AND YOU THINK
I, LIKE, LOVE YOU.
I GOTTA GO WORK OUT.
YOU KNOW, I REALLY THOUGHT I'D DONE SOMETHING.
ME.
I FELT LIKE SOME KIND OF SUPERHERO, YOU KNOW?
CANCER MAN.
I THOUGHT I COULD GO INTO RADIATION TODAY
AND SAY,
"COME ON. NUKE ME.
I CAN TAKE IT. I'VE GOT THIS SUPER WEAPON."
WHAT AN AMAZING JERK I WAS.
CHARLIE...
MY RASH DIDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH
THE RADIATION.
IT WAS...JULIA AND... COUPONS.
SO?
WELL, FOR ONE SECOND
I FELT LIKE I HAD THE TINIEST BIT OF CONTROL.
I FELT LIKE THERE'S SOMETHING I CAN DO
TO BEAT THIS BACK, BUT...
KIRSTEN, WHAT IF I CAN'T?
WHAT IF YOU DID?
YOU HAD A RASH, CHARLIE.
AND NOW IT'S GONE.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
MAYBE IT WAS THE DETERGENT.
MAYBE IT WASN'T.
MAYBE IT WAS THE MEDITATION.
MAYBE IT WAS YOU.
YOU HOME?
I'M NOT LIKE MY FATHER, JULIA.
ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT THIS?
I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT ALL DAY.
I MEAN...YEAH, I BLEW UP.
YOU CALLED CLAUDIA STUPID.
SHE WAS ACTING LIKE A JERK!
I'M...
YOU KNOW, GRIFFIN, I REMEMBER ONCE
YOU CAME OVER...
AFTER YOUR DAD HAD, LIKE,
WHALED ON YOU.
GOD. YOU SLAMMED MY BEDROOM DOOR
AND KNOCKED A PICTURE OFF THE WALL.
AND YOU SAID,
"WHAT RIGHT DOES HE HAVE
TO MAKE US FEEL BAD
JUST BECAUSE HE HAD A ROTTEN DAY?"
THAT WAS TOTALLY DIFFERENT.
WHEN MY FATHER LOST IT, HE HAD NO REASON.
AND YOU DO?
YEAH, I DO, OK?
HOWIE TOOK BACK ALL OF HIS MONEY.
THEY REPOSSESSED MY COMPUTER. I'M GONNA LOSE
ALL OF MY CUSTOMERS.
YOU JUST DON'T GET IT.
NO.
GRIFFIN, THAT'S THE THING--
I DO.
I GET THAT YOU'RE IN WAY OVER YOUR HEAD.
THAT YOU'RE 19 YEARS OLD AND YOU FEEL LIKE
YOU'RE 40 OR SOMETHING.
AND EVERYBODY'S PUTTING DEMANDS ON YOU,
AND YOU'RE SCARED TO DEATH THAT YOU CAN'T HANDLE THEM.
AND THERE'S THIS...
ONE PERSON...
THIS PERSON WHO YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LOVE.
AND YOU WANT TO SAY TO THEM...
"FIX IT.
FIX EVERYTHING."
WELL, I FEEL EXACTLY THE SAME WAY.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I'M GOING INSIDE.
OWEN'S COMING DOWN WITH A COLD OR SOMETHING.
ARE YOU COMING WITH ME?
NO. I'M GONNA STAY HERE.
ONE OF US SHOULD GET SOME SLEEP.
HEY.
YOU'RE STILL DOING THIS MEDITATION THING, HUH?
YEAH, WELL...
YOU NEVER KNOW.
CHARLIE...
YEAH?
IT'S HELPING.
(TAKES DEEP BREATH)
DOES SHE KNOW I'M HERE?
I'M SURE SHE CAN HEAR YOU.
AND SHE'S STAYING IN HER ROOM.
WOW.
SHE'LL ADJUST, BAILEY.
I'M SURE OF IT.
IT'S JUST...
GONNA TAKE SOME TIME.
OK.
THEN WE GIVE HER TIME.
PRETTY AMAZING, ISN'T IT?
WE DID ALL THIS TO SPEND MORE TIME TOGETHER,
AND NOW...
RIGHT.
WELL, MAYBE I'LL SEE YOU AT THE MEETING
IN THE MORNING.
I CAN'T GO TILL THE AFTERNOON.
BUT MAYBE I'LL STOP BY THE RESTAURANT.
IT'S GONNA BE CRAZY THERE.
BUT IF I GET A BREAK DURING THE DAY,
I'LL GIVE YOU A CALL.
OK.
OK.
Annie: GOOD NIGHT.