Party of Five (1994–2000): Season 3, Episode 7 - Personal Demons - full transcript

[man on TV]
Had a run of bad luck lately?

Well, when bad things
happen to good people,

blame the evil eye,
or so says Dr. Aiden Blalock

of Hex-Be-Gone Services.

[Charlie] Damn it. [eerie sounds on TV]

Hey, Claud, can you
hand me the pliers?

Hang on.

This is really interesting.

[man on TV]
As Halloween approaches,

Dr. Blalock says the demand
for his services

-is at an all-time high.
-Claudia!



Services which include
hex lift, ghost-busting,

-exorcism...
-Will you just...

Do I have to do
everything around here?

-Sorry. Sorry.
-[TV clicks off]

I'm sorry.

Maybe that's
our problem.

Maybe there's a hex
on our family.

I mean, when was the last time

anything good happened
around here?

Hurry up.
My arm's cramping.

I mean, think about it.

It's always something sad.

Now that Kirsten's gone,

the whole house
just seems empty and awful.



I don't wanna
talk about it.

[sighs]

Shouldn't you call a qualified
professional for this?

I called a roofer.

He wanted 10 grand
to fix the roof

and do the repairs,
which we don't have.

It's another headache
that I'm stuck with.

-[thunder crashing]
-And you say we're not jinxed.

Will you stop it?

There's no such thing as jinxes
or hexes or curses.

It's all just a bunch of...

[screams]

-[grunts]
-Charlie, are you okay?

Are you hurt?

[grunting]

I think I broke my toe.

[moans]

Man.

See what I mean?

[thunder crashes]

[theme song playing]

♪ Everybody wants to live ♪

♪ Like they wanna live ♪

♪ And everybody wants to love ♪

♪ Like they wanna love ♪

♪ Everybody wants to be ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

[bell dings]

[thunder crashes]

No. I'm just saying
Halloween costumes

should be simple
to nonexistent.

That's all. Here.

Couple nails through the head
and we're outta here.

Bailey, I can't MC
a costume contest

with a nail
through my head.

I'm in charge
of this dance.

You know, I have to look
like I at least tried.

Okay, okay. But do we
have to go all out here?

Here. I got it.

Tom Cruise in
Mission: Impossible.

Bailey, can't you at least
support me in this?

Come on, I went

to that Three Stooges festival
with you.

Five solid hours
of "nyuk, nyuk, nyuk."

That was different. That was...
That was culture.

Yeah. And this is charity.

I know. I know.

The children's clinic
and that's good, but...

-What?
-[gasps]

Snow White
and Prince Charming.

You're not...

Wait a minute.

-You're not--
-No.

No. Of course not.

I mean, not for us.
No. No. It's just...

Look, don't laugh, okay,

but, I mean,
ever since I was aware,

I've wanted to be
Snow White for Halloween.

And can you imagine?
Ick, ick, gah.

I know. I know.

It's just, I've never had a...

A wonderful, handsome boyfriend

to be my Prince Charming.

So it's kind of like this
lifelong childhood dream

I never got to realize.

It's kind of sad
if you think about it.

I'm glad you got over it.

Keep looking.

[Charlie] Listen, Meg, no,
your parents didn't.

I just wanna talk
to Kirsten, okay?

Then can you at least
give her a message for me?

[door opens]

Tell her that I love her, okay?

Meg. Hello?

Hello? God...

[sighs]

[phone beeps off]

I'm sorry, um,
but we're not open yet.

I know. I'm Grace Wilcox
from the Harvest program.

I called last week.

Anyway, we pick up
leftover food from restaurants

to feed the homeless,
and I was hoping that--

Forget it.
I'm not interested.

[sighs]

Look, all I'm asking
is that you let us pick up

the food you're
gonna throw away.

It'll take overtime
from my kitchen staff

and-and extra insurance.
And you know what?

Everybody wants something,

and there's only so much
that I can do.

So if you don't mind...

Actually, I do mind.

People are digging
in the trash

outside your restaurant
for food, and--

Look, I've got enough to deal
with as it is right now.

All right? Now, will you
please just get outta here?

Whoa. Whoa.

I don't even wanna be
on the same planet

when your karma
comes back around.

[thunderclap]

-[clattering]
-Ow! Oh, God!

Oh!

Ouch.

God.

[grunts]

[sighs] Who are you?

Earl Garraty.

Uh, I'm-I'm looking
for Nick Salinger.

[sighs]

Is he around?

Covalent organic compounds.

We're talking both low melting
and low boiling points.

That's low melting
and low boiling.

That makes covalent organic
compounds different

from our friends the...

Inor... Jump in anyone.

Inor-gan...

Inorganic...

compounds.

[Trimble writing on board]

Now, to stimulate
an organic reaction,

we must first find
the proper...

The proper cat...

[giggles]

Cat...

Cata...

Catalyst, people, catalyst!

You know, I just did
odd jobs for your dad:

A little cleaning and a little
fix-up here and there.

And he-he even gave me
stuff to do

that really didn't need doing,

but he knew I needed
the cash, so...

Ah, man, oh, man.

Nick, of all people.

Yeah.

Look, uh, you're welcome
to hang out

and have some coffee
if you want, but I've--

I've kind of got a lot
of work to do, so...

Oh, right. I'm wasting time.
Uh, where do I start?

-Start?
-Yeah.

Hey, I could do a job
on that brass for ya.

It's a little bit
on the dull side.

-No.
-Have you got some--

No. That-that's okay.

-There's gotta be something.
-I-I-I could sweep.

I could sweep in here
or I could--

-I'm not...
-I-I don't have anything.

Well, your father always
found something for me to do.

I'm not my father!
All right?

I can't help you.
I can't help anybody.

I'm sorry, but no.

Could I at least--

I told you, no!

...use the bathroom?

[sighs]

[thunder rumbling]

I can't come in
until you invite me.

I might track in
negative forces.

Oh, can't have that.

Come in.

Charlie's room, where he
called off the wedding.

That was fun.

[door creaks open]

[sighs] This was Bailey's.

Something bad's always
happening to him.

Julia's old room
at the end.

Miscarriage.

And this is where I found
Kirsten crying that time.

She came down here because she
thought no one could hear her.

But it went up through
the heating ducts,

and, well, it sounded like
the whole house was sobbing.

Only now she's gone,
and it's all my fault,

and Charlie hates me.
And I have to do something.

There is a vortex
of negative forces here,

and I'm getting something.

[thunderclap]

What is this?

Some stuff of my parents.

They died three years ago.

I'm sorry.

So you think
we need an exorcism?

No, nothing that dramatic.

It's gonna be a simple
purification ritual.

You'll have to gather
a few items from your siblings.

I'm gonna
give you a list.

And I'll also need some things
from your parents:

photos, handwriting samples.

Now, then, I need
a few minutes alone

so I can tap into
the energy of this house.

Um... sure.

[thunder crashes]

[Callie]
Oh, come on, I bet
you'd look cute in tights.

That's not the point.

-Damn it!
-[Callie laughs]

[laughing] Whoops.

The point is...

that I can't believe
she's making me do this.

-The Pop-Tarts are yours.
-Mmm.

I'm starting to feel like I got
one foot stuck in high school, and that's just... That's...

These are definitely not mine.

Oh, yeah, well, you never know
when you're gonna...

You know, I'll just put these
in the bathroom.

So if you guys wanna,
you know...

Yeah. Right.

There's no danger of that.

Huh?

We don't...

Never mind.

You don't what?

-[sighs]
-Practice safe sex?

The safest kind.

Wait a minute.
You mean, you guys...

You guys don't, like...

[sighs]

Oh, my God.

-Are you a virgin?
-What?

No, I'm not.

I used to with my last
girlfriend all the time.

Only...

Look, I-I really
don't wanna talk about this.

So your last girlfriend.

So that's...

[bottles clink]

You haven't had sex
in two years?

-Do you mind?
-Sorry.

Well, I'm just--

I'm gonna go, and I'm gonna
get out of these clothes.

[thunder rumbling]

I can't believe that Sarah's
pushing this whole faculty jack-o'-lantern thing.

Does this look anything
like Principal Stickley to you?

Close enough. [chuckles]

Yeah? Good.

Hey, um, you know how you were
gonna drive me to the dance

and we were gonna
hang out and stuff?

Uh-huh.

[sighs] Uh, well, would it
be cool with you if, uh--

You asked
Robin Chaffey instead?

I saw you guys passing notes
in Trimble's class.

I say, go for it.

Yeah? You're okay with that?

Justin, of course
I'm okay with it.

I mean, we're
friends now and I...

And I think it's great.

Good. 'Cause I-I mean,
I wanted to tell you,

but I-I just didn't know,
you know.

We've been out, uh,
like, three times.

She's cool.

Oh, and she's funny too.

She... I mean,
she cracks me up.

Really? Wow. Good sign.
Anyway, um...

Yeah, oh, she did
this whole run

about how she likes
to name everything.

Uh, she named her high tops
Luke and Laura.

Then she named her boots
[laughs] Mork and Mindy.

She's crazy, really.

I mean, it was funny
when she said it.

You sure you're okay with me
telling you this stuff?

Absolutely.

Okay. Good.
'Cause this is too cute.

She said that when
she hit puberty,

she named her breasts
Thelma and Louise.

[forced laughter]

Is that funny or what?

Hysterical.

Um, I'm done.

You ever notice how, like,
even when pizza's bad,

it's still pretty good.

You know,
kind of like sex.

[laughing]

I'm never telling you anything
ever again. I swear.

Oh, come on,
have another beer.

You probably need it.

What?

I should... study.

Yeah.

[thunder crashes]

Oh, God.

Oh.

You have a flashlight?

No, but I might be able
to scare up some candles.

Give me a hand.

Ray was, like, really into
this whole earthquake thing.

He kept a bunch
of supplies up here.

Uh, I know
I saw some up here.

Um...

Ah. Here they are.

Uh, Callie,
you should, um...

-Hmm? Here.
-Your...

Oh, sorry.

[grunts]

Wait.

We can't...
I can't do this.

It'll come back to you.

My underwear.

Where's my underwear?

I chucked them into
the fireplace, I think.

Why so modest?

Come here.

No.

I can't believe... How could...
What was that?

W-what just happened here?

Gee, I don't know.

Sex?

This shouldn't have happened.

This-this-this shouldn't
have happened.

Sink's running.
I can't hear ya.

[knock on door]

[Bailey sighs]

One second.

-Hey.
-Sarah.

Hey.

God, can you believe it?
Pocahontas wasn't ready.

But I got you John Smith

and your sword's
still in the car.

Well, let's go get it.

Well, you know what, Bailey,
if it bothers you that much,

it'll never happen again.

Oh, Sarah.

What'll never happen again?

Nothing. Just...

Oh, I, um, I left some food
out in my room.

Now we got a couple roaches.

And Bailey's having a stroke,
but it'll never happen again.

Never. I promise.

God, Bailey.

What?

What happened to your hair?
[chuckles]

Nothing.

-[clanks]
-Ow!

God. What...

What do you
think you're doing?

Well, I'm just fixing
the latch on this cabinet.

Here. See?

Good as new.

No. No, look, I told you--

Well, somebody would have had
to done it sooner or later.

So I would have done it
for Nick, so...

Unbelievable.

All right. You know what?

Fine. You win.

Here you go.
Here's a twenty.

I haven't earned
that much yet.

Will you please
just take it and go.

See, that's something
that Nick taught me.

I came in here
looking for a handout.

And Nick says, "Well, sure,
but maybe you could help me

put those shelves up
over the bar first."

So I did.

I felt so good that day,

I-I even gave you
a dollar for helping me.

-Me?
-Yeah.

You couldn't have been
more than, what?

Five? Six?
Cute little fella.

In fact, you were
standing right there,

and you handed me
the tools.

I did? I-I was here?

Yeah.

Yeah, your dad
used to look after you

when your mother was off
playing the fiddle so...

[chuckles] I don't
remember that.

Look, Charlie,

I'm sorry for coming
back here like this,

but I just couldn't
find a job yesterday.

So I figured if I came back

and I showed you
I was a good worker--

All right. Um,

maybe I can think of something.

Hello, Kyle?
Hi, it's Julia.

Uh, Salinger.
You know, from Trig?

Right. Right.

Hi. No. No reason.

I was just, um,
calling to say hi.

And, uh, listen, Kyle,

I have to work
at this stupid Halloween dance,

and I was just wondering
if you wanted to, you know,

come with me and hang
or something.

You would?

Cool, that's...

Mono?

Oh. That's a drag.

[Blalock] Earth, air,

water,

fire,

salt of the earth,
purge this house.

We have to do
every room like this?

Shh!

Eventually.

Salt of the earth,
purge this house.

You have serious
water damage.

Is there a spell
that can take care of it?

You need a dry-wall guy.

I'm talking about the stains
on the ceiling.

Oh, yeah,
We have a leaky roof

and we can't afford
to fix it right now.

Negative forces.

But when we're done,
your luck is gonna change.

Now, then, did you
bring me all the things

that I asked you to bring me?

Right here. [exhales]

Hair from Julia.

Excellent.

-One of my baby teeth.
-Perfect.

A button from one
of Charlie's shirts.

Good.

Bailey's sock,
and Owen's pacifier.

Perfect. Now, the pictures
and the handwriting samples

that you gave me,
they will go in here.

They will be sealed
by the earth.

You're gonna carry this
behind me

while I purge
the rest of the house.

And that's it?

I think by Halloween,

you're gonna be home free.

Your dad said he couldn't
put it together for you

till we finished working.

So next thing we know,

here you are coming out
of the back room

on that damn Big Wheel.

You could barely read,

and you put the thing
together yourself.

[laughs]

-I did that?
-Yeah.

It was a room full of people,
and there you are,

you're zipping around
in between the tables.

And your dad
is chasing after you.

Okay. Let's give it a shot.

[grunts]

Hey, hey, hey.
No more bump.

[chuckles]

Okay.

Well, this has been
great, Charlie.

[grunts]

But we're done, and it's time
for me to get out of your hair.

-What's your hurry?
-No hurry.

You've been such a big help
to me and we're done, so...

Well, actually, um,

I was thinking I could
use some shelves

over the prep table
in the kitchen...

if you're interested.

No, no. Gary, don't be silly.

Of course, I understand.

I just never knew,
that's all.

So I-I hope you and Mike
have a great time.

[laughs] Okay. Bye.

[sighs]

-Oh. I'm sorry.
-I'm sorry.

-Julia...
-Oh.

-Hey.
-Robin, hey.

Uh, you're-you're
meeting Justin here?

Oh, no, no.

No, it's Tuesday.
He's got that...

-Club thing. Right.
-Yeah.

Well, uh...

You-you know, um, actually,

I'm kind of glad to run
into you without him.

-You are?
-Well, yeah.

I just, um...

Okay, I hope this isn't
too weird or anything,

but I just
wanna say thanks.

Thanks?

Yeah. For being
so great about this,

about me and Justin.

Oh, please.

You guys were,
like, a major item.

And, frankly, you're kind of
a tough act to follow.

Oh, that's nice
of you to say, but--

And then Justin tells me
how cool you are

about us going to the dance.

That means so
much to me because,

Julia, I am so into him.

I mean, God,
he is such a great guy.

Oh. Stupid me.
Look who I'm telling, huh?

Yeah, um, well, I'm--

I'm just really glad
you guys are happy.

You know, I should
probably be going.

Wait, he is?

I-I mean, he told you that?

Well, yeah. Sure.

Robin, it was nice
talking to you, but--

Hang on, hang on.
What else did he say exactly?

If you don't mind my asking.

Oh, well, he-he said
that you're great

and, uh, funny and...

perfect.

Perfect? No, really?

[giggling]
Oh, wow.

You know, Robin, you've got
chocolate on Thelma.

-Or is that Louise?
-[gasps]

Halloween costumes.

So how much
is your student discount?

Huh?

Oh, uh, 20 percent.

Hmm. There had to be
some reason I'm dating you.

[chuckles]

I guess.

So, what's next?

Hmm, it's quiet.

It's a bookstore.

It's nice.

God, you know, I feel--
Feel like I haven't seen you,

I've been so busy
with this dance

and we haven't been alone
in, like, forever.

I miss you.

I miss you, too.

-Hmm.
-Anyway, we should--

I'm sorry.
I had onions for lunch.

You're fine.

Look, I can't...
I can't do this now.

Why not?

Because we're in a bookstore

and there's people
all over the place.

I mean, we should probably
finish getting

these books that you need.
Here, let me see the list.

No. That was the year
that Mom and Dad

went as Mr. Ed, remember?

And Charlie
was a bum.

A hobo.

Whatever.

Anyway, their costume's
still down in the basement.

Great. It's bad enough
I can't get a date,

but there's no way I'm going
as a horse's butt.

Hey, who spilled the salt?

-Oh, don't look at me.
-[answering machine beeps]

Hey, Owen, what are you
gonna be for Halloween?

A monkey.

[woman on machine]
San Francisco national.

I am trying to reach
a Nicholas Salinger...

-Oh, man.
-Why would someone still--

...about the Visa account
you opened yesterday.

Yesterday?

There's been a lot of activity

on this account,
and we need to verify

a few rather sizable purchases
you made this evening.

So if you could please
just give us a call back here,

the number is 1-800...

But the account's
been closed, right?

It's still active.

That way if anyone
tries to use it again, it'll make it that much easier
for us to pick 'em up.

[sighs] It was so weird

hearing Dad's name
on the machine like that.

Almost like a ghost
or something.

I can't believe anybody
would do this to us.

All it takes
is a social security number

and a little know-how.

Yeah, but it's been
three years since he died.

I mean, why now?

Have you thrown out any
of his papers recently?

Uh, old bills, bank statements,
anything like that?

No. We kept
most of that stuff.

It's down
in the basement.

Anybody been
down there unsupervised?

Workers? Repairmen?

We had a water heater
installed a few weeks ago.

What was the name
of that company, Claud?

Huh?

The water-heater guys?

Oh, it--

It might not...
have... been them.

There was somebody else?

Well, yeah.
There was this guy.

What guy?

Nobody. Just this, um...

um...

exorcist.

Excuse me.
May I help you?

Um, yeah.
I wanna rent these.

[woman]
For sale only.
No rentals,

no returns,
for obvious reasons.

What happened to Snow White
and Prince Charming?

They lived happily ever after?

The costumes.

Snow White and Prince Charming,
they were right here yesterday.

Rented.

I have a couple
of dwarfs left.

-Happy, Dopey--
-No.

I need Snow White
and Prince Charming.

Was I speaking French?

Look, you don't understand!
I have to be Prince Charming!

[sighs] Look, look, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. Okay?

It's just, I did, like,
the worst thing I could have

possibly done to somebody
that I really love.

And I didn't mean to do it.

And it just...
It just happened.

And this sounds
totally insane to you.

I know. But the only way
that I can make up for it

is to be Prince Charming.

Try the yellow pages.

We're not the only costume
shop in town, you know.

[sighs]

[shop bell dings]

-[Justin] Look, I'm sorry.
-[bell rings]

Please, this
is not the time.

-We'll talk.
-No. Just go.

[Trimble] Reversible reactions.

-[Trimble writing on board]
-If we sulfinate naphthalene

by adding sulfonic acid

or the SO3H functional group,

we can obtain
two different,

separate, distinct...

chemical products.

At a temperature
of 80 degrees Celsius,

-we get a rate of reaction
-[hisses]

that is much faster

at the alpha position.

Are you with me? People?

[sniffs]

Something burning?

They said they
made an arrest, right?

I mean, it's not like
we have to pay

for anything he bought,
so all we have do

is just go in there
and make our statement--

Claudia, I can't believe
you did something so stupid.

I can't believe you let
a total stranger in our house

with nobody there
except Owen and you.

He wasn't a stranger.
He was on TV.

And besides,
I mean, [sighs]

I was only trying
to help, Charlie.

And I swear, everybody's
just so unhappy right now--

So you hired an exorcist?

That's... I thought
you had a brain, Claudia.

You knew you don't go around
trusting strangers like that.

Hey, isn't that--

What's he doing here?

Wait a minute. You think he's--

I gave him the key
to the file cabinet

so he could fix the drawer,
and he must have...

[car door shuts]

Oh, man, what an idiot.

Yeah. I mean, how could he--

No, Claud. I meant me.

[siren wails]

Snow White

and Prince Charming.

I had to drive all the way
to the East Bay to get these.

The least you could do
is "ooh" and "ahh" a little.

[sighs]

Hey, come on, Sarah.

Look, I'm-I'm sorry
about last night.

I was in a mood.

Look, Bailey,

I know what's going on.

Goin' on? Nothing's goin' on.

Look, don't lie to me, okay?

'Cause it's only gonna
make it worse.

Lie to you?
Why would I lie to you?

I mean, I should've
seen it coming.

You're in college now, and...

And I'm still stuck
in high school.

Okay.

Look, Sarah, I can explain.

So I can't blame you

for being mad at me.

Mad at you?

Yeah.

I'm practically forcing you
to go to this stupid dance,

and it's so totally
high school.

I mean, like you'd wanna go.

So...

you know what?
You don't have to.

It's okay.

I mean, that's it, right?

No.

I mean, yes, it was.

I admit that,
but this dance thing,

it's not silly.

You know, it's-it's
your life right now.

And I know I've been
a creep about it,

but this is
important to you, and...

And you're important to me.

And so it's important
that we do this together.

Like really, really important.

[chuckles]

Sometimes I don't think
I deserve you, you know that?

[chuckles]

Okay. Look, I know you're mad.

She won't even talk to me,
you know that?

One stupid mistake

and now she's acting
like I shot her dog.

I know. I know.
And I'm really sorry.

I don't even know
what came over me.

I mean, she was just there
and rattling on and on

about how great and wonderful
you were, and I just...

-I snapped.
-Julia, what--

I shouldn't have used the whole
Thelma and Louise thing

-to hurt her.
-Hey. Hey. What the hell
are you talking about?

I'm talking about
why Robin's mad at you,

because I made some
catty remark about her boobs,

and I'm not proud of it.

That's not why
she's mad at me.

-It isn't?
-No.

She tells everybody
about Thelma and Louise.

So... So why is she mad at you? She's mad at me because...

No. You know what?

That's between Robin and me.

That's actually
none of your business.

Okay. Okay. You're right.

But you did that?

You actually did something

that selfish and heinous
on purpose?

I mean, why would you?

The-The fact that you would
wanna screw things up for me.

-Man, that's--
-Justin--

What is it, Julia?

I mean, y-you really think

that you're still
that important?

[footsteps approaching]

[sighs]

How's the toe? Hurts like hell.

You...

You need me to bring you
some ice or something?

You don't remember seeing
any old pictures of me

with a Big Wheel, do you?

I don't think so. Why?

I'm trying to find out
if I ever had one.

I don't remember,
and I'd kind of like to know.

I'll help you look.

[sighs]

I can't believe
he'd do that to us.

Well, I mean, to you.

What a creep.

So, what's a Big Wheel
look like, anyway?

I don't know
what I'm looking for

or what I'm doing anymore.

I guess I just... [sighs]

It's hard enough
to let people in.

And then-then you try to-to
help them or-or you love them

and-and you try so hard
to make this connection,

and then it's just...

[sighs]

You end up with nothing.

So why bother?

What's the point
of even trying?

[clears throat]

Whoops. Sorry.

Could I get
some privacy, please.

[laughs] It's not like you have
anything I haven't seen before.

Oh, that's great.
That's great.

-This is funny to you now?
-[laughs]

Yeah, in a twisted,
cruel sort of way.

Yeah, a little.

Yeah, well, it's not.

Okay?

Look, what happened
between us, what we did--

-Uh-huh?
-That was a mistake.

Yes. There's-there's some kind
of attraction or whatever.

But I have a girlfriend,
and I love her very much.

-Has that changed?
-No.

So then why are you
so bent out of shape?

Bailey, big deal.

[scoffs] It happened.

We were careful. Okay, in case you're worried,

I get tested every three months
and-and so should you.

You know, I mean,
if you're gonna be--

No. No. See, I'm not.

Okay, that's not who I am.

Look, y-you seduced me.

-Whoa. Seduced you?
-Yeah.

I don't do things like that.

Yeah. Well, obviously, you do.
And you know what?

If it hadn't been me,
it would've been somebody,

'cause you were
ready for it, Bailey.

So don't you dare
try to blame me

'cause you're
not happy with Sarah.

Don't you even try.

[scoffs]

Prince Charming, huh?

That's a good one.

[Claudia screams]

-[screaming]
-Claud...

[continues screaming]

-What's going on?
-You gave me a heart attack.

-What the hell?
-Look at it, Charlie.

Look at it.
Look at it. Read it.

Can you believe that, Charlie?
Can you believe it?

Look at the date.
November 15th.

Can you believe that, Charlie?

It gives us, what?
Like, two weeks?

Two weeks for what? What?

It's a warranty for the roof.
Where'd you get this?

I was in the basement looking
for something to use as a cape,

and I was going through
that box

of Mom and Dad's stuff,

the one the exorcist guy
said he got a good vibe from.

And there it was.

Can you believe it?

That proves it.
That proves it, Charlie.

He said by Halloween our luck
would change and it did.

It did.

And see, we're gonna be
able to fix the roof and--

It's just a lucky
coincidence, Claud.

I told you
there's no such thing.

Oh, Charlie, how much
more proof do you need?

[doorbell rings]

[Claudia sighs]
Trick-or-treaters.

Man, we should play the lottery
tonight. Come on, Owen.

[giggles] Claudia.

I gotta go talk to her.

I can't let her go around
believing that stuff.

Why not?

Charlie, God,
w-what's the big deal?

Because life's
not that simple.

She's gotta know
that she was cheated

and lied to
and taken advantage of.

She doesn't think she was.

So, what's she gonna do
from now on?

Throw salt in the corner

every time something
bad happens?

You know what? I'd love
to believe that too,

but it doesn't work that way.

Charlie, I-I know things
suck for you lately

and--and they kind of
suck for me too.

But we're responsible for her.

And you know what?

So what? Who cares?

She thinks that she did
this really great thing for us.

And-and she's thinking
that's, like, pretty cool.

And-and she's feeling
really good about it.

And...

let her have that.

I mean, wouldn't it be great
to feel that good?

[rock music playing
on speakers]

[Sarah over PA]
So everybody, uh,

remember to vote
for best costume.

Oh, oh, oh, and don't forget
to have your souvenir pictures.

Only-only 5 dollars
in the cemetery.

Thanks.

[Justin]
Hey, Sarah. Sarah!

All right, these
are the last two:

Mr. Peppers
and Miss Humphries.

-Where do you want 'em?
-What?

-Where do you want 'em?
-Over there with the others.

Hey, have you seen Bailey?

No. Can I go home now?

[rock music playing
on speakers]

One word and you die.

[giggles]

[clears throat]

Hey, Justin,
you want some help?

No.

[sighs]

You're welcome.

Hey, Nance, can you
cover for me?

[chattering]

Hey, there you are.

Hey, I'm sorry I'm late.

I-I got... Traffic.

God.

God, you-you look
like a fantasy. Wow.

People were staring at me
in my jeep.

Only 'cause you look
so handsome. [chuckles]

And me?

You look like Snow White.

[chuckles]

So anybody
spike the punch yet?

Excuse me.

You here to soap my windows?

Actually, um, I heard
you had a little run-in

with my evil twin
the other day.

I'm here to apologize.

I don't do cute, all right?

And I was just on my way out.

Wait a second. Please,
just give me a second here.

I know that I was
a total jerk the other day.

I know that.

And-and I'm sorry.

But, um,

I've been through
some stuff lately, and...

And that's not your problem,

and I'm not looking
for any sympathy.

But...

I brought some food.

Um, basil manicotti
and artichokes.

It's in my truck.

Look, it's late.

Uh, my drivers
have already left.

I don't wanna hear this
right now, okay?

Right now, I just...

I-I need to do this.

I want to do this.

Please.

[sighs]

I guess we can put it
in the fridge.

You need a hand? Yeah. [chuckles]

Actually, I could
use a little help.

[rock music playing
on speakers]

Great costume.
Wish I'd thought of that.

What do you want?

Nothing.

I was... I was just thinking

we should've come
as Thelma and Louise.

It would've made
Justin's head explode.

Do you think that's funny?

Sorry.

This was kind of last minute.

I'm supposed to be a Gypsy
fortune teller. [chuckles]

You want me to read your palm?

No.

I'm pretty good. Here.

Oh.

What's this?

Wow. Big fight with someone.

Wow. I'm so impressed.

And-and this is interesting.

The guy you're fighting with

i-is, like, totally nuts
about you.

Julia, why are you doing this?

Because whatever he said
or did,

he's not the kind of guy who...

He would never do something
to hurt you on purpose.

So it had to be a mistake.

And, he doesn't make many.

Besides,

knowing Justin,
he'll feel so guilty

that you can milk it for days.

God, he just... He made me
so mad, you know?

Well...

if you ever wanna get back
at him, this is what you do.

[Bailey]
No. I'm just saying,
you spike the punch,

you'll make more money.

People get a buzz on,
they get generous.

Yeah, and Miss Stickley
shuts us down.

This is not
a frat party, Bailey.

-It's a charity dance.
-Oh, so-so that means what?

That we can't have any fun?

I was having fun.

Right.

Right. Sorry. Fun.

This is... This is fun.

Definitely.

My legs itch.

Great. Nobody's doing pictures.

What?

Well, come on,
maybe if they see us.

Wait-wait a second.
I don't know.

Five bucks for a Polaroid?

-That's why nobody's doing it.
-It's for charity.

It's a rip-off.

God.

God, you know,
what is with you?

I mean, one minute
you're renting costumes

and making speeches
about how important this is.

And the next,
you're acting like

you're doing me some huge favor

by even being here.

I've got news for you. You're
not doing anybody any favors.

You're just acting like
a royal pain in the ass.

Hey, I'm only here because
you guilted me into coming.

-What?
-Yeah.

What? No. You said
that this was imp... Look, I told you that
if you didn't wanna be here,

just say so.

I don't want to be here.

I don't wanna be
anywhere near here.

What is with you?

Why are you being
such a bastard?

I don't know.

I guess it's just who I am.

[mellow rock music playing]

Sorry. I...

Rob, hey,
c-cool costume. Pimp?

Lounge lizard. Ah. [chuckles]

[sighs]

I-I love this song.
You wanna dance?

[mouths]
Thank you.

Um, everybody, there's-there's
no waiting for pictures.

No waiting for pictures.

Bailey.

-Huh?
-Sorry.

You-you just... You looked
like you were having

some sort of a private moment.

I just wanted you to know
I was standing here.

Anyway, I'm-I'm just...
I'm gonna go.

Um,

wait a second. Wait.

Actually, I'm kind of glad
you're here.

You are?

Yeah.

'Cause...

Y-you have
another one of those?

[chuckles]

There's a six-pack
in the fridge.

Good.

Good, 'cause I could
use one right about now.

Do you maybe wanna, um...

Do you wanna sit down

and talk or something?

Um, actually, I...

'Cause, listen,

-I owe you a big apology.
-[door opens]

[man] Hey, Cal,

what, are you growing
your own hops in here or...

Oh, excuse me.

Sorry, Brent.

Roommate stuff.

Oh. Hey.

Hey.

[Callie]
I'll be right there, okay?

Thanks.

[sighs]

Sorry. I didn't know.

Bailey.

[sighs]

[mellow music playing]