Parker Lewis Can't Lose (1990–1993): Season 2, Episode 18 - Glory Daze - full transcript
In High School often times there are legends from years past to which tales transcend through the generations. Ronnie Ray is probably the biggest legend in Santo Domingo's history and the legend returns to be honored. When Parker ...
Winner, Hardest Working Hair
in Show Business,
Parker Lewis!
Winner, Best Rebel
With or Without a Cause,
Mikey Randall!
Winner, Best Technological
Advancement in a Coat,
Trench or Over, Jerry Steiner!
Winner, Best Bootlick in
a Half-Hour Comedy,
Frank Lemmer!
Yay.
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
Santo Domingo's local hero
has always been
Ronny Ray Rasmussen.
1969's Boy of the Year,
homecoming king,
and captain
of the baseball team.
Legend has it
Ronny's pitching arm
was so powerful that, on a dare,
he hit the school flagpole
with such force
it's remained bent
from that day on.
Whenever Flamingos
salute the school flag,
they're saluting Ronny Ray.
And now the living legend
is coming home.
Home to accept
the Alumnus of the Year award.
Naturally, everybody's
eager to see him.
Well, almost everybody.
Don't let me smell him, Frank.
The man has
unimaginable power over me.
He emanates this unique musk
which I cannot resist.
When I was a schoolgirl,
Ronny led me on
and then broke my heart.
Ronny! I caught
your home run ball.
Would you sign it?
Please, please, please?
Thanks.
- Dinner tonight?
- I do!
I mean, I'd love to.
I've sworn never to succumb
to that potent scent again.
Oh, help me, Frank!
Help me to just say no!
I'll be your human shield,
Ms. Musso.
After all, I'm an expert
at cloaking feelings of love.
Well, I'd be flattered
by all this attention,
but I'm guessing
it was either me
or a B in Geometry, right?
Take a good look, Park.
That's the guy
we all wanted to be.
I haven't seen
this kind of excitement
since Prince rear-windowed MTV.
Feeling funny,
and I don't know why.
Excuse me while I kiss the sky.
Hey, Ronny.
Your dad,
buds with a living legend?
Coolness, Park.
Hey, Ronny, say hey
to my son, Parker.
Hey, good-lookin' boy.
You're adopted, right?
Say good night, Gracie.
Gracie, you look
as sweet as the day we met.
- Uh, speech!
- Speech!
Speech! Speech! Speech!
- Speech! Speech!
- Speech! Speech!
Speech! Speech!
Well, it's good to see
that things haven't changed
here at Santo Domingo.
The girls still look pretty,
and the boys still look
pretty desperate.
But seriously.
I've got something to tell you,
And it's not gonna be easy.
I cannot accept this honor.
I never got
my high school diploma.
You see, at the end
of my senior year, my family
moved away before I had a chance
to finish my final term paper.
Pretty ironic.
The guy who never got
his diploma comes back
to accept the Alumnus
of the Year award.
Well, that's why I want
to re-enroll in Santo Domingo
and finish that paper
so I can prove to you all
that I am worthy
- of this award...
- If you'll have me.
Oh, no!
Fasten your seatbelts, kids.
Something tells me life
at Santo Domingo
is about to become legendary.
PA
PARK
PARKER
8:58
8:58 a
8:58 a.m
8:58 a.m.
A legend returns
to Santo Domingo.
Pager number, sir.
The minute you do
anything legendary,
beep me.
Well, if it isn't Marty Lewis,
the next generation.
The Bud Slap?
Glad to know some adults
are watching the show.
Funny, I used
to sit here in this class
with my pal, Marty Lewis.
And now, 22 years later,
I am sitting here with his son.
Parker Lewis.
Hope we can be pals, too.
- Coolness.
- Okay, people.
We were discussing
bicameral legislation
when we last broke.-
- Did anybody order
a large pepperoni and mushroom?
Over here.
Mr. Rasmussen,
I appreciate you've been away,
but this is not Ridgemont High.
I suppose you bought enough
for everyone?
It won't happen again.
Don't forget,
you have a term paper due
end of the week.
Trust me, there isn't
a pizza big enough
to get you out of that.
Pizza, pizza.
Eek!
So, how's this for a topic?
A day in the life
of my all-time hero,
Sandy Koufax.
It is a history class, Ronny.
I think Loopman expects
something a little
more relevant
to world history.
A week in the life.
Hey, why don't I put together
some notes for you?
You know,
just to get you started.
No, I couldn't let you do that.
Oh, not a problem, I wanna help.
If you insist.
Hey, look at that.
Used to be my locker.
They retired it in '69.
Observe.
Oh, coolness.
♪ Hello my baby
hello my honey
Wrong box.
Ah, here it is.
My old love letters from Gracie.
Wow, Ms. Musso
wrote all these?
We're talking one major
love thing.
A double-hinge locker
in a single-hinge zone.
This isn't my locker, Frank.
Oh, breaking and entering,
even better.
Ms. Musso will want
to have a few painfully choice
words with you, now march.
Listen, pal, Parker didn't
break into that locker.
I did, so if you need someone
to hand-feed to Musso,
I'm your man.
Wait, that's okay.
I'll look the other way, see?
Go.
No, really, I insist.
In fact, I'm gonna go
turn myself in
to Musso right now.
Ms. Musso,
I'm sorry.
He has no right being here,
he's entirely innocent.
He entrapped me, entrapping.
You know, Grace,
this is the first time
I ever wanted to be sent
to the principal's office.
Yes, well, that's all
very charming.
Excuse me, is that...
My love letter?
No words ever touched me
the way yours did, Gracie.
My love letters?
Wheel Man and Chick Magnet
ride again.
Dos daring dudes.
Fuel-injected cruisers
and proven heart-bruisers.
The scourge of Santo Domingo,
tearin' up the highway like...
Butch Cassidy
and the Sundance Kid.
Never seen it.
- Never seen it?
- Okay, end of the movie...
Butch and Sundance are
surrounded by
thousands of Bolivian soldiers.
And they're hurt bad,
they're bloody,
but they still have
a great sense of humor.
You didn't see Lefors
out there, did ya?
Lefors? No.
Good, for a minute,
I thought we were in trouble.
Fuego!
Fuego!
Missing, one study buddy.
Ronny's term paper is
due tomorrow,
or he doesn't graduate.
Bad time to pull a no-show.
Hello?
Hey, Ronny, where are you?
Yeah, we gotta jam
on these papers.
A job interview?
What, tonight?
Okay, don't panic, listen.
I'll write it.
Hey, no big deal, really.
I've already outlined it,
the rest is a
walk in the park.
Yes, I insist.
Hey, what're friends for, right?
See ya.
Phew.
Writing a term paper requires
discipline, intense
concentration,
and the ability
to put those little,
everyday distractions
behind you.
9:55 p.m.
Ten hours of nonstop work,
and Ronny's term paper
is finally done.
Now all I have
to do is write mine.
But first, a much-deserved
Atlas Diner break.
So, instead of pointing
to the center field fence,
I point to myself,
then I point
to the pitcher's sister,
then I point to the dugout.
Ball hits me in the chest,
we walk in the winning run.
Mental note,
apply for official status
as America's number one sucker.
Friday, 8:58 a.m.
Two minutes to Loopman.
While I spent half the night
writing his term paper,
Ronny Ray danced till dawn.
Legend or no legend,
I won't let him
get away with it.
Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
Ronny! Ronny!
So, Parker, what's the word?
The word is "party,"
as in last night's
little diner soiree.
I'm sorry, Parker, I screwed up.
I don't know what it is, I...
No, that's not true.
I do know what it is.
So do you.
It's the call of the diner.
That's what high school's
all about, hanging out.
You understand.
After tomorrow,
it's all over for me.
My glory days will be
gone forever.
I don't want you thinking
I use my friends
like doormats.
You're a class act, Parker.
Maybe if I'd known
more guys like you in my life,
I wouldn't be 42 and...
Back in high school,
you know what I mean?
Jerry?
I wanna go on record.
I want everyone to know
what Parker Lewis means to me.
He helped me out
when I needed it most.
He's a friend.
- Get that?
- Every immortal word, sir.
Maybe I overreacted.
Still friends?
Yeah.
Hey...
- Are you sure?
- I insist.
Can I get you guys something?
Uh, I'll have
the Ike and Tina Tuna.
No mayo.
"Badfinger Sandwiches"?
"Jethro Tull-house Cookies"?
Ugh, I'll just have a Coke.
Right, one
Creedence Clearwater
Coke, coming right up.
Hey, look, Dad,
they're only charging
'60s prices tonight.
Wow, nothing over a buck.
- Hey, kids?
- Gorge till you puke.
Uh, pardon me.
How much are your
Yellow Submarine sandwiches?
25 cents, want one?
I'd like 700...
And one.
Vicissitudes of a love refound
got you down, Grace?
I need help, Nick.
I'm under Ronny's spell.
Branded by his pungent appeal.
Why, his mere presence
induces me to...
Schlocky Vertigo effect?
God, does it show?
Nick, you're a comely,
aromatic man.
Tell me, how can I fight back?
The great thing about a picture
is that they never change,
even when the people in them do.
Ask yourself, do you still
belong in this picture?
Did you ever belong
in this picture?
Hey, there's my girl.
What do you say
we go away this weekend?
I feel like celebrating.
Okay.
Hey, everybody!
You're looking at a real
high school graduate!
I did it!-
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
- Ronny!
How does he manage?
Ronny Ray Rasmussen.
He's a legend,
he's a high school graduate...
He's a fraud.
Talk to me, Jer, what's wrong?
The unthinkable, sir.
This is the term paper
Ronny supposedly
wrote in 1969.
"Moonshots and Rimshots:
The Jose Jimenez Story."
And this is the autograph
he gave me on Monday.
Look closely, you'll note
the handwriting doesn't match.
But if Ronny Ray didn't write
this old book report,
then who did?
Impossible to say, sir.
But whoever it is has
questionable spelling skills
and a rather annoying habit
of quoting Jimi Hendrix.
"Excuse me
while I kiss the sky"?
Oh my God, it can't be.
It's my dad.
The big night,
Santo Domingo's
Alumnus of the Year award.
An evening
to honor this school's
only living legend.
No, make that
"liar."
Ronny conned his way
through high school once.
I won't let him do it again.
Compadre!
We've gotta talk.
Oh yeah, the Marty report.
A fine piece of writing.
You Lewises do good work.
Yeah, like father, like son.
Attention, please, attention?
Moose.
That's better.
It is time to introduce
the Alumnus of the Year award.
And here to introduce
the man of the hour
is Ronny's best friend
and former Flamingo
Glee Club treasurer,
Marty Lewis.
Santo Domingo is perhaps
best known for two things.
Ronny Ray Rasmussen,
and one hellacious glee club.
Ooh, boy, tough crowd.
Though Ronny Ray captained
the Fighting Flamingos
to three straight
baseball championships,
he was always a team player.
So you did all the work,
look at it this way.
You're on Jeopardy,
Alex asks you a question
about American history,
boom, you're
the returning champion.
Known for his leadership
abilities,
his courage, his honesty...
So I boned ya, I hear
you get away with murder.
Yeah, but the difference is,
I don't use people
to get what I want.
I do the work myself.
But you, you're acting
like Tom Sawyer.
You remember him,
or did you have someone
read that for you, too?
What am I supposed
to do with this?
What becomes a legend most.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you the Alumnus
of the Year,
Ronny Ray Rasmussen!
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
Thank you, thank you very much.
But I can't accept this award.
What?
It's kind of funny.
You know what I remember most
about high school?
Everything.
Especially the friendships.
The ones you make that feel like
they're gonna last a lifetime.
And sometimes they do.
I never thought
I'd be able to make
friends like that again.
But this week I did.
A friendship that
I would be a fool to waste.
And I did.
And I am sorry.
And so I would like
to hand this award over
to someone more deserving.
A man that I am proud and lucky
to still be able
to call my friend.
A true Renaissance Flamingo.
Marty Lewis!
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
I don't know what to say.
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
Hey, everybody.
Kube say make Ronny Ray
Boy of the Year.
Yeah!
- Well...
- This is a great honor.
And straight out of left field.
Which reminds me
of a funny story
about a bat boy, a cheerleader,
and the left field foul line.
If you knew
about Ronny all along,
how could you still
be friends with the guy?
Parker, let me tell you
something about Ronny.
Being a high school hero
is all he's ever
accomplished in life.
If he didn't have his past,
Ronny wouldn't have
any place to live at all.
Truth is, he lives in his car.
Hey, Ronny?
Would you mind fixing
our flagpole?
Sure.
Just give me a tall ladder
and about 300 throws.
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
Yeah, no doubt about it.
He's more of a hero now
than ever.
Maybe.
But to me, he's just
a 42-year-old Boy of the Year.
I guess he just does
what he has to.
I wish him luck.
You know, I've always felt
more fortunate than Ronny.
But never more than right now.
You're a smart guy, Park.
Gotta be hereditary.
Remind me to thank Mom.
The world
will always need heroes.
Someone who represents
the best we can be.
Usually, it falls
to the flashy guys,
like Ronny, while
the other heroes,
the quiet ones,
are harder to spot.
Unless you know where to look.
Mr. Lewis? Mr. Randall?
Mr. Phillips? Hello?
in Show Business,
Parker Lewis!
Winner, Best Rebel
With or Without a Cause,
Mikey Randall!
Winner, Best Technological
Advancement in a Coat,
Trench or Over, Jerry Steiner!
Winner, Best Bootlick in
a Half-Hour Comedy,
Frank Lemmer!
Yay.
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
Santo Domingo's local hero
has always been
Ronny Ray Rasmussen.
1969's Boy of the Year,
homecoming king,
and captain
of the baseball team.
Legend has it
Ronny's pitching arm
was so powerful that, on a dare,
he hit the school flagpole
with such force
it's remained bent
from that day on.
Whenever Flamingos
salute the school flag,
they're saluting Ronny Ray.
And now the living legend
is coming home.
Home to accept
the Alumnus of the Year award.
Naturally, everybody's
eager to see him.
Well, almost everybody.
Don't let me smell him, Frank.
The man has
unimaginable power over me.
He emanates this unique musk
which I cannot resist.
When I was a schoolgirl,
Ronny led me on
and then broke my heart.
Ronny! I caught
your home run ball.
Would you sign it?
Please, please, please?
Thanks.
- Dinner tonight?
- I do!
I mean, I'd love to.
I've sworn never to succumb
to that potent scent again.
Oh, help me, Frank!
Help me to just say no!
I'll be your human shield,
Ms. Musso.
After all, I'm an expert
at cloaking feelings of love.
Well, I'd be flattered
by all this attention,
but I'm guessing
it was either me
or a B in Geometry, right?
Take a good look, Park.
That's the guy
we all wanted to be.
I haven't seen
this kind of excitement
since Prince rear-windowed MTV.
Feeling funny,
and I don't know why.
Excuse me while I kiss the sky.
Hey, Ronny.
Your dad,
buds with a living legend?
Coolness, Park.
Hey, Ronny, say hey
to my son, Parker.
Hey, good-lookin' boy.
You're adopted, right?
Say good night, Gracie.
Gracie, you look
as sweet as the day we met.
- Uh, speech!
- Speech!
Speech! Speech! Speech!
- Speech! Speech!
- Speech! Speech!
Speech! Speech!
Well, it's good to see
that things haven't changed
here at Santo Domingo.
The girls still look pretty,
and the boys still look
pretty desperate.
But seriously.
I've got something to tell you,
And it's not gonna be easy.
I cannot accept this honor.
I never got
my high school diploma.
You see, at the end
of my senior year, my family
moved away before I had a chance
to finish my final term paper.
Pretty ironic.
The guy who never got
his diploma comes back
to accept the Alumnus
of the Year award.
Well, that's why I want
to re-enroll in Santo Domingo
and finish that paper
so I can prove to you all
that I am worthy
- of this award...
- If you'll have me.
Oh, no!
Fasten your seatbelts, kids.
Something tells me life
at Santo Domingo
is about to become legendary.
PA
PARK
PARKER
8:58
8:58 a
8:58 a.m
8:58 a.m.
A legend returns
to Santo Domingo.
Pager number, sir.
The minute you do
anything legendary,
beep me.
Well, if it isn't Marty Lewis,
the next generation.
The Bud Slap?
Glad to know some adults
are watching the show.
Funny, I used
to sit here in this class
with my pal, Marty Lewis.
And now, 22 years later,
I am sitting here with his son.
Parker Lewis.
Hope we can be pals, too.
- Coolness.
- Okay, people.
We were discussing
bicameral legislation
when we last broke.-
- Did anybody order
a large pepperoni and mushroom?
Over here.
Mr. Rasmussen,
I appreciate you've been away,
but this is not Ridgemont High.
I suppose you bought enough
for everyone?
It won't happen again.
Don't forget,
you have a term paper due
end of the week.
Trust me, there isn't
a pizza big enough
to get you out of that.
Pizza, pizza.
Eek!
So, how's this for a topic?
A day in the life
of my all-time hero,
Sandy Koufax.
It is a history class, Ronny.
I think Loopman expects
something a little
more relevant
to world history.
A week in the life.
Hey, why don't I put together
some notes for you?
You know,
just to get you started.
No, I couldn't let you do that.
Oh, not a problem, I wanna help.
If you insist.
Hey, look at that.
Used to be my locker.
They retired it in '69.
Observe.
Oh, coolness.
♪ Hello my baby
hello my honey
Wrong box.
Ah, here it is.
My old love letters from Gracie.
Wow, Ms. Musso
wrote all these?
We're talking one major
love thing.
A double-hinge locker
in a single-hinge zone.
This isn't my locker, Frank.
Oh, breaking and entering,
even better.
Ms. Musso will want
to have a few painfully choice
words with you, now march.
Listen, pal, Parker didn't
break into that locker.
I did, so if you need someone
to hand-feed to Musso,
I'm your man.
Wait, that's okay.
I'll look the other way, see?
Go.
No, really, I insist.
In fact, I'm gonna go
turn myself in
to Musso right now.
Ms. Musso,
I'm sorry.
He has no right being here,
he's entirely innocent.
He entrapped me, entrapping.
You know, Grace,
this is the first time
I ever wanted to be sent
to the principal's office.
Yes, well, that's all
very charming.
Excuse me, is that...
My love letter?
No words ever touched me
the way yours did, Gracie.
My love letters?
Wheel Man and Chick Magnet
ride again.
Dos daring dudes.
Fuel-injected cruisers
and proven heart-bruisers.
The scourge of Santo Domingo,
tearin' up the highway like...
Butch Cassidy
and the Sundance Kid.
Never seen it.
- Never seen it?
- Okay, end of the movie...
Butch and Sundance are
surrounded by
thousands of Bolivian soldiers.
And they're hurt bad,
they're bloody,
but they still have
a great sense of humor.
You didn't see Lefors
out there, did ya?
Lefors? No.
Good, for a minute,
I thought we were in trouble.
Fuego!
Fuego!
Missing, one study buddy.
Ronny's term paper is
due tomorrow,
or he doesn't graduate.
Bad time to pull a no-show.
Hello?
Hey, Ronny, where are you?
Yeah, we gotta jam
on these papers.
A job interview?
What, tonight?
Okay, don't panic, listen.
I'll write it.
Hey, no big deal, really.
I've already outlined it,
the rest is a
walk in the park.
Yes, I insist.
Hey, what're friends for, right?
See ya.
Phew.
Writing a term paper requires
discipline, intense
concentration,
and the ability
to put those little,
everyday distractions
behind you.
9:55 p.m.
Ten hours of nonstop work,
and Ronny's term paper
is finally done.
Now all I have
to do is write mine.
But first, a much-deserved
Atlas Diner break.
So, instead of pointing
to the center field fence,
I point to myself,
then I point
to the pitcher's sister,
then I point to the dugout.
Ball hits me in the chest,
we walk in the winning run.
Mental note,
apply for official status
as America's number one sucker.
Friday, 8:58 a.m.
Two minutes to Loopman.
While I spent half the night
writing his term paper,
Ronny Ray danced till dawn.
Legend or no legend,
I won't let him
get away with it.
Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
Ronny! Ronny!
So, Parker, what's the word?
The word is "party,"
as in last night's
little diner soiree.
I'm sorry, Parker, I screwed up.
I don't know what it is, I...
No, that's not true.
I do know what it is.
So do you.
It's the call of the diner.
That's what high school's
all about, hanging out.
You understand.
After tomorrow,
it's all over for me.
My glory days will be
gone forever.
I don't want you thinking
I use my friends
like doormats.
You're a class act, Parker.
Maybe if I'd known
more guys like you in my life,
I wouldn't be 42 and...
Back in high school,
you know what I mean?
Jerry?
I wanna go on record.
I want everyone to know
what Parker Lewis means to me.
He helped me out
when I needed it most.
He's a friend.
- Get that?
- Every immortal word, sir.
Maybe I overreacted.
Still friends?
Yeah.
Hey...
- Are you sure?
- I insist.
Can I get you guys something?
Uh, I'll have
the Ike and Tina Tuna.
No mayo.
"Badfinger Sandwiches"?
"Jethro Tull-house Cookies"?
Ugh, I'll just have a Coke.
Right, one
Creedence Clearwater
Coke, coming right up.
Hey, look, Dad,
they're only charging
'60s prices tonight.
Wow, nothing over a buck.
- Hey, kids?
- Gorge till you puke.
Uh, pardon me.
How much are your
Yellow Submarine sandwiches?
25 cents, want one?
I'd like 700...
And one.
Vicissitudes of a love refound
got you down, Grace?
I need help, Nick.
I'm under Ronny's spell.
Branded by his pungent appeal.
Why, his mere presence
induces me to...
Schlocky Vertigo effect?
God, does it show?
Nick, you're a comely,
aromatic man.
Tell me, how can I fight back?
The great thing about a picture
is that they never change,
even when the people in them do.
Ask yourself, do you still
belong in this picture?
Did you ever belong
in this picture?
Hey, there's my girl.
What do you say
we go away this weekend?
I feel like celebrating.
Okay.
Hey, everybody!
You're looking at a real
high school graduate!
I did it!-
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
- Ronny!
How does he manage?
Ronny Ray Rasmussen.
He's a legend,
he's a high school graduate...
He's a fraud.
Talk to me, Jer, what's wrong?
The unthinkable, sir.
This is the term paper
Ronny supposedly
wrote in 1969.
"Moonshots and Rimshots:
The Jose Jimenez Story."
And this is the autograph
he gave me on Monday.
Look closely, you'll note
the handwriting doesn't match.
But if Ronny Ray didn't write
this old book report,
then who did?
Impossible to say, sir.
But whoever it is has
questionable spelling skills
and a rather annoying habit
of quoting Jimi Hendrix.
"Excuse me
while I kiss the sky"?
Oh my God, it can't be.
It's my dad.
The big night,
Santo Domingo's
Alumnus of the Year award.
An evening
to honor this school's
only living legend.
No, make that
"liar."
Ronny conned his way
through high school once.
I won't let him do it again.
Compadre!
We've gotta talk.
Oh yeah, the Marty report.
A fine piece of writing.
You Lewises do good work.
Yeah, like father, like son.
Attention, please, attention?
Moose.
That's better.
It is time to introduce
the Alumnus of the Year award.
And here to introduce
the man of the hour
is Ronny's best friend
and former Flamingo
Glee Club treasurer,
Marty Lewis.
Santo Domingo is perhaps
best known for two things.
Ronny Ray Rasmussen,
and one hellacious glee club.
Ooh, boy, tough crowd.
Though Ronny Ray captained
the Fighting Flamingos
to three straight
baseball championships,
he was always a team player.
So you did all the work,
look at it this way.
You're on Jeopardy,
Alex asks you a question
about American history,
boom, you're
the returning champion.
Known for his leadership
abilities,
his courage, his honesty...
So I boned ya, I hear
you get away with murder.
Yeah, but the difference is,
I don't use people
to get what I want.
I do the work myself.
But you, you're acting
like Tom Sawyer.
You remember him,
or did you have someone
read that for you, too?
What am I supposed
to do with this?
What becomes a legend most.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you the Alumnus
of the Year,
Ronny Ray Rasmussen!
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
Thank you, thank you very much.
But I can't accept this award.
What?
It's kind of funny.
You know what I remember most
about high school?
Everything.
Especially the friendships.
The ones you make that feel like
they're gonna last a lifetime.
And sometimes they do.
I never thought
I'd be able to make
friends like that again.
But this week I did.
A friendship that
I would be a fool to waste.
And I did.
And I am sorry.
And so I would like
to hand this award over
to someone more deserving.
A man that I am proud and lucky
to still be able
to call my friend.
A true Renaissance Flamingo.
Marty Lewis!
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
I don't know what to say.
- Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
Hey, everybody.
Kube say make Ronny Ray
Boy of the Year.
Yeah!
- Well...
- This is a great honor.
And straight out of left field.
Which reminds me
of a funny story
about a bat boy, a cheerleader,
and the left field foul line.
If you knew
about Ronny all along,
how could you still
be friends with the guy?
Parker, let me tell you
something about Ronny.
Being a high school hero
is all he's ever
accomplished in life.
If he didn't have his past,
Ronny wouldn't have
any place to live at all.
Truth is, he lives in his car.
Hey, Ronny?
Would you mind fixing
our flagpole?
Sure.
Just give me a tall ladder
and about 300 throws.
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny! Ronny!
- Ronny!
Yeah, no doubt about it.
He's more of a hero now
than ever.
Maybe.
But to me, he's just
a 42-year-old Boy of the Year.
I guess he just does
what he has to.
I wish him luck.
You know, I've always felt
more fortunate than Ronny.
But never more than right now.
You're a smart guy, Park.
Gotta be hereditary.
Remind me to thank Mom.
The world
will always need heroes.
Someone who represents
the best we can be.
Usually, it falls
to the flashy guys,
like Ronny, while
the other heroes,
the quiet ones,
are harder to spot.
Unless you know where to look.
Mr. Lewis? Mr. Randall?
Mr. Phillips? Hello?