Parenthood (2010–2015): Season 2, Episode 14 - A House Divided - full transcript

Cory Smith.
My new boss.

We're going to be going for an
extremely youth-oriented product.

And it is going to get radical.

Point, honey.
I got it, I got it.

When you regain our trust,
you can have your door back.

You guys have gone crazy.

If things are gonna
work out between us,

you got to make things right
with your folks. I miss you.

When you tell a teenage girl
that she can't have something,

she's gonna want it even more.

I mean, you know that.



Right.

What's going on?
Can I stay here for a while?

How long a while?

College.

Hey, Maximo, look at this.
You remember this?

Uh, yeah. Yeah, I do.

Your dad caught a trout
with this baby

on his first
camping experience.

You ready to catch
some fish, Max?

Not really.

Oh, come on, just wait till we get out there.
It's gonna be fun.

Tell him
it's gonna be fun, Adam.

Max, it's gonna be fun.

Tell him more enthusiastically.



It's gonna be fun, Max.

Yeah, it's gonna be fun.

It's part of the whole Braverman
male-bonding camping experience.

You know,
we get to catch our...

Catch our dinner and cook it on a
fire and sleep under the stars.

Huh? You ready to do
some bonding, Max?

Uh-huh.

It's gonna be one of the five best
moments of your life, grandson.

Yep. You know, grandma's
making her waffles

with the chocolate chips,
so I'm gonna go inside.

All right, go ahead.

Listen, Dad,
about the fishing...

I just want you to understand.

You know, It's a long time for him
to be sitting down and waiting.

And Max likes things
to happen right away.

Oh, he's gonna be fine, son.
He's gonna be fine.

You and Kristina...
You worry too much.

Listen, Dad, we just...
We just want you to have a successful trip, okay?

So that's...

why Kristina
put this together for you.

If you could just
give it a read.

Now, what the hell is this?

It's just a set of,

you know, guidelines to help you
and Max have a successful trip.

Oh, now, I don't need
an instruction manual

to take my grandson camping
for one night, son.

Actually, you do.

Huh.
Okay?

Well, worry not, my son.

Worry I will, my Father.

Oh, boy.
This is worse than I thought.

Yeah.

Oh, my God, it's scented.

Yeah.

Oh, boy.

Oh! Julia.

Well, congratulations.

She's such a sweetheart for
throwing me an engagement party.

Yeah.
But I have to admit,

she kind of
scares me a little bit.

Oh, Julia scares you.

Yeah.
I've never heard that before.

"Passed hors d'oeuvres,
formal dinner, party games."

Embossed invitation? There's only
gonna be, like, five people there.

I mean, isn't this a bit much?

I mean, I'm appreciative for her doing
this for me, but I'm fine with pizza.

I'm simple.
I don't need a big to-do.

You understand this party
isn't about you, right?

Yeah, it is. It's the Braver-women
inviting me into their tribe.

No, no, this... This party's
about Julia proving something.

Proving what?

Well, that's not clear
just yet,

but believe me,
she's out to prove something.

Enough is enough, right?

It's been two days,
and I want her home.

This is ridiculous.
Yeah.

But we can't just
drag her home.

Why not?

'Cause she'll just leave again.

I'm sure your mom's having
one big party over there.

Kristina, come on, you know, my
mom's not on Haddie's side here.

Oh, yes, she is.
She really is.

Look, Kristina, I just...

I don't want to show up
there and make things worse

by forcing the issue.
That's all I'm saying.

Okay, well, she's 16, she's our
daughter, and I want her home.

All right.

What's with the doorbell?

Come on in.

Uh, thanks, but we're, uh...

We're here to talk to Haddie,

privately,
if you wouldn't mind.

Sure, I'll get her.

Thanks, Mom.
Thank you.

Awkward.

Hey.
Hey.

Can we talk to you?

Privately, outside?

Okay.

We want you to come home.

Well, you know my condition.

Haddie, come on, we're your parents, okay?
Oh my God! We're not...

We're not here to negotiate.
Absolutely not.

Well, I'm not gonna come
home until I can see Alex.

Haddie, I know that
you think you're an adult

and you can make up your own mind
about things. But you're not.

You're 16.
And you live in our house.

Absolutely.

Well, not right now.
That's why I'm not there.

You're acting like a baby.
You're not gonna date Alex acting like this.

This is ridiculous.

Dad?
Yeah?

Is this the way that you feel
after Alex went to talk to you?

I like Alex, okay?

I don't think it's an appropriate
relationship for you,

and I think that
staying here is a stunt.

Why don't we have
a conversation

about what it is that makes
you uncomfortable about Alex?

We had a conversation about what
makes us uncomfortable about Alex.

But we can get past it if you just
talk about it and don't just...

You're 16 years old.
You're a junior in high school.

He's 19.
He lives in an apartment.

What about him being black?

That has nothing
to do with it, okay?

Please don't ever
bring that up again.

We're not racist, okay?

Well, then...

You're 16. He's 19, okay?

He lives alone in an apartment.
I mean,

I've heard this before.

He's an alcoholic
and you're not an alcoholic.

Stop saying things
that are just wrong with him.

This is somebody that I care
about, that I want to be with.

You want to be with him?

Yes.

More than you want
to be with us?

Yes.

There's nothing else to say.

I agree.

Excuse me.

"Performance, excellent.

"Friendliness, great.

"Productivity, excellent.

"Timeliness, sporadic."

Sporadic?
What?

But I'm almost always on time.

Almost always
is not always on time.

Listen, Sarah, you're the one who
requested a performance review,

which we don't normally
do for interns.

No, I know, but I need
a good performance review.

I'm trying to get
a raise here, you know.

Do you have any idea how
much Berkeley costs a year?

Yeah, it's like 25 grand a
year with room and board.

Okay, you know how much
of that I have saved

for Amber's college education?

Listen, Sarah, I had to fire a
quarter of the workforce here.

I know, but...

Shouldn't those of us who
made the cut be celebrated?

Too soon?
Yeah.

Listen, Sarah, even if we
could give you a raise,

which we can't,

I'm in bizarro-land
with this guy here, okay?

I mean, my plate is full enough

trying to keep boy blunder
from sinking the ship.

What is he doing?
I don't know.

What is he...
Oh, hey.

What is that?

Is that rock on?

This is hang loose.
That's rock on.

Oh.

Okay, you know what?

You and Adam and Crosby can stay
out drinking till after midnight.

You know, have fun, 'cause the
girls are gonna be having fun...

If we must.
Here.

Uh-huh.

Oh, gosh, this is
so important to me.

Clearly. We still
got two days, hon.

- I just...
- I want it to be awesome.

It will be, honey.

I know. I just...
I want them to leave and say,

"I can't believe
I ever thought that

"it was not gonna be
fun at Julia's."

I'm sure they don't think that.

I know.
I'm sure they don't.

And yet, they go
to mom and dad's,

and they go to Adam and Kristina's,
and they don't come here.

Well, it's probably 'cause
we're kind of out of the way.

No, let's be honest.
They need to know that it's fun here.

It is fun here.
It's fun here.

It's tons of fun here.
It is.

You, me, a six-year-old.

I have hors d'oeuvres for the living
room and then a sit-down dinner.

You do?

And then I have party games.

Oh... Party games?
Mm-hmm.

You don't think that
sounds a little, uh...

What?
Uh, just planned.

It won't feel planned.
It's gonna...

It's gonna flow nicely and
feel very natural and fun.

Yeah. And a good party
needs structure.

Mmm.

Yeah.

Okay. Yeah.

Kristina!

Hi.
Oh, hey.

Um, can I come in?

Of course.

Thank you. I just, um...

I wanted to drop off
some clothes for Haddie.

Oh.
Yeah.

I'm sure she's borrowing
all of Amber's.

Good idea.
She'll be happy to see those.

Yeah. I also want to give you,
um, some money.

Oh, no, no.

I'm sure she's been eating
you out of house and home.

So just a couple bucks.

No, I'm not taking it.

But could we talk
just for a minute?

Yeah, sure.

We're both on
the same side here, you know.

Right? We both just want
what's best for Haddie.

I know. I... I do.

We both do. I'm just...
I'm upset at her, and I'm taking it out on you,

and I don't mean to.
I don't.

It's okay, really.
Okay.

Don't worry about it.

Thanks.

I just think that you might be
choosing the wrong battle here.

Okay, Camille, I don't want
to get into this again.

Well, I just don't think
it's gonna do any good

to tell Haddie that
she can't see Alex.

Oh, okay. You know, she's
falling in love with him.

That's what's happening.

I mean, you can like it or not,

but you can't tell her to not
feel what she's feeling.

Mmm-hmm.

Camille, thank you
so much, okay?

But I've got it covered.

Okay.
Okay?

So please make sure
she gets those clothes...

Your mother can be
so condescending.

I know how my mother can be, Kristina.
Come on, whose side is she...

Thank you. I mean, whose
side is she on, you know?

It's like, help us out
here, Camille, you know?

I don't think there are
any sides here, Kristina.

I think that my mother
is just trying to be

supportive
of her granddaughter.

Mmm-hmm. Right.
And she knows Alex well

from working at the soup kitchen.
Really?

So maybe she has
a valid point of view.

I know that
she knows Alex, okay?

But I know that
he's an alcoholic, okay?

And he's 19,
and he lives by himself.

Yeah, I know
he's an alcoholic, too,

and I know he has
his own apartment.

We've been through
all this, okay?

We've been through
our list of pros and cons

on the list that
we made, you know.

I understand that.
What are you saying?

Maybe we made a mistake.

Okay, go on. Go ahead.

I like him.

You like him?
Yeah.

That's great. You spend 10
minutes with him at your office.

He comes by,
and now you like him.

This doesn't make any sense to me.
I don't wanna... Kristina...

I don't want to have an argument, okay?
No, no, no.

I'm not having an argument, okay?
I'm just saying,

he has integrity, he's polite,

he's smart,
he's honest. I like him.

That's amazing.
Maybe you guys can be pals.

Maybe you can be
friends and hang out.

Kristina.

I feel like we made
this decision,

and now we've just
got our heels dug in.

We're trying to save face, and I
think we're making a mistake, okay?

You're wrong.
I know where this is headed, honey.

They're at two different stages
in their lives right now, okay?

She's gonna start spending
the night, okay?

She's gonna start
sleeping over there.

She's gonna start
having sex with him,

and we're gonna
lose her to this guy

that we don't even really know.
Gonna start having sex?

Kristina, you got to
wake up here, okay?

Exactly what you're afraid of is what's
gonna happen. We're gonna lose her.

We just lost her for three or four
days over at my parents' house.

Adam...

There's no telling what's gonna
happen when she turns 18.

You know what?
You're right.

We can lose her.

Hey.

Hi. Want one of these?

Yeah.
I have one that says "Adam."

Do you want that one?
Yeah, I do.

It's got my name on it.

She got off to school okay this
morning, just so you know.

I wasn't worried.

All right.

How'd she seem?

Like a teenager.

Really?
Yeah.

That's disturbing.
I know.

Adam, don't worry, you know.

Think of how many times
I disappeared, I mean...

Well, don't think about that.

Yeah. I don't want
to think about that.

Is there anything I can do?

I don't know. Just don't make
it too comfortable for her.

Oh, God, no!

Got her sleeping in a room with Amber.
No one can survive that.

Yeah.

It's what we get for raising
strong, independent girls.

So it's our fault?

Oh, yeah.

Should have crushed their spirits
while we had the chance.

Ah, blew it.
We're bad parents.

Here.
Huh?

Oh, you don't have to do that.

I have a drawer
all cleared out for you.

It's cool.
Look, I got all this room.

Besides, now, I can steal
your sweaters, like this one.

I love that sweater.
Me too.

So, obviously, having you here

is the happiest thing
that's ever happened to me

in my whole life,
but I'm just curious.

How long do you think it's actually
gonna be till you go back?

I mean, until my parents
change their minds about Alex.

Okay.

And are you gonna be, like, seeing
Alex during this time or...

Well, he won't see me until
they do change their minds, so.

So you're not talking
to your parents

for a guy
that won't talk to you?

I know.

Okay, it's not great.
Well...

Oh, no.

Ew.
Ew.

It's so manipulative.

It's so manipulative.

But it's also kind of sweet.
They're pretty cool.

- I don't know, Dad.
- I don't think it's...

Ooh! Ah!

- This it?
- No.

That's the last time I lend
my Coleman stove to anybody.

Hey.
Hey.

The future Mrs. Braverman.

So, I hear
you're taking Max camping.

Yes, I am.
And Jabbar's gonna be next.

What about Sydney?

No, Sydney is a girl.

What? Girls don't camp?

No, honey, see, this is
a male-bonding thing.

It's traditional.
This, like, goes back

to the original Braverman
hunter-gatherers.

That is sexist and absurd.

- Yes, it is.
- Indeed.

Well...

Luckily, we had a boy, so...

Okay, on that note, I'm gonna
leave now and go teach my class.

Okay. And I'm gonna leave
you cavemen to it.

Bye.
Bye.

Well, I love a woman
that speaks her mind.

Mmm-hmm.
Sonny, she is a keeper.

Well, thank you.

So, Dad...

You're 100% on this
Max camping trip?

Oh, wait a minute.
You're not gonna lecture me

about this Asperger's
thing too, are you?

Well, have you seen Max have
a full-fledged meltdown?

How much worse
could it be than yours?

I didn't have tantrums.

Well, you were
a terror, Crosby.

No, you have me confused
with one of your other kids.

Maybe it was Sarah.
Uh-huh.

Yeah.

Listen, Dad, what
I'm trying to tell you is

this is a totally
different ball game.

Excuse me, Cory?
Do you have a minute?

Uh...

Just really quick. Um,

I just wanted to give you this.
It's an evaluation of me.

And do you mind?

Please.

Um, I just wanted to educate
you about, you know, who I am.

Okay.

And I guess what I'm here to
do is to ask you for a raise.

Let me just tell you, um...

I mean, I've been an intern
for a while, and, um...

Also my daughter's applying to
college, and it's really expensive.

I totally get that
you need to pay

for your daughter's
education...

Oh, thank you.

Oh, my God, because...

But I don't think so.

You... No,
so just you don't think...

It's just not the right time.

When is the right time?

I honestly don't know.

Uh, okay.

Um, well...

It's just that, uh, you know,
I'm just an intern here,

and if I'm not gonna
advance or make any money,

you know, what am I doing here?

What are you doing here?

Oh, well, I designed this
shoe, see, that clicked.

It didn't work.
But, um, I thought, you know, I would try

this kind of design out,

and, you know, see if it...
If I... If it was a good fit.

Was it?
Yeah, I mean, you know,

it's not everything
I want, but, um...

Well, what do you want?

In life?

Yeah.
Well, I don't know.

I mean, I want to make money
doing something I love.

You totally should.

Yeah, I totally should.
But you can't just go doing,

you know, what you want to do.

Why not?

Well, I mean, I've tried that,
you know, I haven't found the...

You know, I haven't
found it yet, so...

Okay.

Okay.

But... So, okay, so...

It's not here is
what you're saying.

Maybe not.

- Okay, Max, you ready?
- No.

I don't want to do this.
I'm not excited.

It's gonna be exciting.
No, it's not gonna be really exciting.

Yes, it is.
Stop telling me...

It's gonna be so much fun.

No, it's not. It's not gonna be any fun.
I promise you.

- Hey, hey!
- Can I look for bugs now?

Okay, Max, you ready
for the camping trip?

Yes, he is.
Yeah.

It's gonna be great.
Atta boy.

Hey, Kristina, I want
you to know something.

What?

I read the instruction manual
cover to cover.

Okay, good.

I am now in the know.

Okay, that's excellent.
What about his meals?

How are you planning
on handling his meals?

The meals are
gonna be fish for dinner,

and probably steak
and eggs for breakfast.

Oh, yeah. No, the fish he won't do.
He won't do the fish.

And steak he will only do
really well done.

If it's pink,
he's not gonna eat it.

And the eggs,
they can only be cooked

in the orange
frying pan at home.

Yeah.
This was all on the

instruction manual.
Okay, well, see, Kristina,

let me tell you something.

When men go into
the woods, things happen.

We go into a survival mode.

We're gonna be just fine.

Mmm.
Don't you worry.

That's a...

Aw, man.

- Hello?
- Hey, Dad,

did you remember to bring those
bug books that I gave you for Max

so he can have some
time to himself to read?

Hey, son, let me
tell you something.

What?

You and your wife are insane.

Well, do you have them or not?

Yeah, I got the bug books.
You do?

Hey, Max. All set
for your big adventure?

Max, get up.
Hi, Kristina.

Hey, Camille.
Listen to me.

Hey, listen to me.
I want you to have a good time, okay?

Because grandpa never took me
camping, so appreciate it.

Okay?

Okay. There we go.

I don't want to go. You go.

Come on, Max. Come on.

Hey.
Hi.

Everything all right?
Yeah.

Need anything?
Nope.

Your brother misses you.

Thanks for the clothes.

She okay?

Bye, buddy.

Adios, amigos.

Okay, have fun.
Just drive safely.

Bye!

Oh, my God!

Oh, dear God.

Bye.

Are you all right?

I don't know, honey.
Something just came over me.

I'm like...
Can you feel my forehead?

Yeah.

Just for a second?
Like, I'm... It's all pain.

Oh, yeah, whoa! I don't want
to get too close,

because you've definitely
got a bad case of

"I don't want to go to this party-itis.
" A severe case.

That's... Okay,
you know what?

What?
I don't want to go.

I can't go there and act
like everything's okay.

Okay? Julia will understand.
It's fine.

Oh, yeah. Come on,
I mean, it's Julia.

I mean, she's the most
easygoing person in the world.

Honey, Haddie looked so happy.

Yeah.

Hold on.

Who is that?
Hey. Hello?

Zeek?
What's up?

Is Max okay?

Yeah.
Is it Julia?

The party's canceled, isn't it?

No, I get it, I think.

That party's canceled.
I don't have to go.

Okay, all right.

No, it's not a problem.
I will be there as soon as I can, okay?

All right, bye.

Who was that?
That was Cory from work.

He wants me to come
to the office immediately.

It's Saturday.
Why are you going in there?

Yeah, I know. Because he says
he's figured it all out.

Figured what out?

Shoes.

Hey, Max,

come here and help me
set up the tent, will you?

And then we can go fishing.

You said
we could look for bugs.

Yeah, but I think we
should get the camp ready

while we still have
light here, grandson.

I want to look
for bugs now, though.

Well, Maximo, I could really
use your help over here.

Come on, now. We're a team.

If we're a team, then how about

we look for bugs first,
then set up the tent?

Why can't we eat anything?

Because I'm sure
she'll be here any minute,

and then she gets to see...
We can't eat that?

How beautifully
it's all presented.

What about that?
Not getting anything yet.

Jules, can I get a little more?

Yeah. Is it minty enough?
It's delicious.

Did Crosby tell you about all
her food allergies and stuff?

What?
Dairy, nuts, shellfish.

Are you kidding? I made...

Okay, I made crab cakes.
Lemons, limes.

That's everything.
That's dairy.

I mean, she's got
something, I think.

It's just so easy.
It's like shooting fish in a barrel.

You're a bad, bad person.

It looks really good.
I can't wait to eat.

Yeah, it's delicious.
I don't deserve that.

Is it always like this?
Am I always that gullible?

It's just like...

Haddie's doing well,
you know, so don't worry.

I know it's crazy,
but she's doing great.

Thanks. Thanks for, um, you
know, looking out for her.

Appreciate it.

I've been there.
Yeah.

You know, if I told you
how many times

this one here
ran away from home...

Mom.
You wouldn't believe it.

Not that one.
Only this one.

You managed somehow to make me feel
like a really rotten mother, you know?

Sorry.

Well, I don't really feel
like a rotten mother,

but sorry you felt like that.

I didn't mean you.
I was talking about me.

Mmm.

Can we just talk about
something different, you know?

I'd kind of like to
take the night off

from thinking about my teenage
daughter and her problems.

Let's not talk about any kids at all.
Absolutely.

This is carefree night.

This is ladies' night.

We're gonna have girls night.

- Let's make...
- Hello, hello!

- Hi!
- Hey, ladies!

There she is,
the bride-to-be!

Of course,
the lady of the hour.

Hello.
Everyone looks gorgeous.

Okay, so the bride-to-be
has to wear this!

Oh, wow.

It's your party!
I'll just put it...

Uh, I need a mirror
to put it on.

After you have a drink.

And a drink.
A drink.

Yes. Yes, yes, yes.
I made mojitos.

And they're good.
They are good, right?

Yeah.

We also have
red wine, white wine.

Okay,
do you want a mojito?

Hey.
Hey.

You wanted to talk to me?

I figured it out.

You figured what out?

Cold fusion?

No.

I figured out what to do
with the company.

Oh, okay. What, uh...

What's, uh...
What's all this?

All right, check it out.
This is where we started.

One store on University
Avenue with one shoe...

One brilliant,
brilliant design.

Yeah, I know, I was there.

I know you were, man.

I know you were.

And then we expanded.

Two stores.
Three stores.

Then we started selling
to chain stores.

Mmm-hmm. Then there's the
online store, right?

The T&S cross-trainer.
Yeah.

The T&S air Walker.

Yeah, well, you know, we were diversifying
the product line at the time.

And we wiped out, dude.
It was a big seller.

Who cares?

We lost the magic.

Gimmicks, man!

Gimmicks, they're just...
Oh, I can't stand them.

When I bought my first pair
of T&S shoes, I was like,

"Yes, this is me.
This is who I am."

And look at us now.
Look at what we've become.

Just gimmicks.

Uh-huh.

And clutter.
Okay.

We totally lost our way, man.

Mmm.

Edible?

Okay, thank you.

In 1999, I bought my first
pair of T&S surf-riders,

the best damn sandal
ever made, man.

Agreed.
That was a great shoe.

It was a great shoe.

One shoe. One shoe, dude.

That is our mission.
Mmm-hmm.

Well, you know, Cory,

that's just not the way this
business really works anymore.

Exactly.

It's what made T&S great.

It'll be what
makes it great again.

That's something you
have to think about. I know.

By the time Jabbar
goes to college,

who knows how
expensive it'll be?

Oh, that's what
I'm dealing with right now.

I quit my job with Adam because
I make more in tips at the bar.

It's not my dream,
but what are you gonna do?

Well, now you have
time to pursue your dream.

Oh, okay, Mom.

Okay. SARAH: I'll do
that between shifts.

I was thinking before dessert and
before we open your presents,

we would play this game.

"Table topics: Questions to
start great conversations."

So let's go to the table.

Wait, we're at the table,
and we have topics.

Yes, but we're
done with dinner,

and we're gonna
go to that table.

And this is gonna be another
different, fun conversation.

Oh! A different,
fun one, okay.

Come on, let's go.
It will be fun.

Oh, my goodness.
"Table topics."

We can't wait.

Uh, hey, Jules, you know what?

I'm actually gonna
head out. I've... I'm...

Oh, Kristina.
I'm so tired.

I've had just a really
long week, and I'm...

You're missing dessert.

I know. Save me some.

I've eaten so much.
Let her go.

She has
a lot on her mind.

I'm sorry. What, Camille? I...

Did you say something?
'Cause I'm...

I just said you have
a lot on your mind,

and if you wanna go,
you should be able to go.

Thank you.

Dinner was delicious.

I'll see ya.

No, you got to go
in that half-pipe.

You got to go in from the top.

Yeah, I saw the barrel.

Did you go over it?
Hit pause.

- Crosby!
- I'll get it.

You get extra points.

Hey!
Hey, sorry I'm late.

I just got called
into the office.

It was a total ambush.
It was unbelievable.

But it was pretty
mind-blowing, too,

because you remember
that boss that I have

who I think is an idiot, but he...
You don't remember that guy?

Well, he's not an idiot.
I mean, he is, but he's not.

He's got all these
wacked-out charts

and mumbo jumbo drawn
all over his office walls.

It makes absolutely
no sense whatsoever

until, bam, it hits me
like a rainbow.

You know? You know how you always
think the grass is greener,

but you get there and it's not?

Well, he's right.
He's right.

Hit you like a rainbow?
Yeah, he's right.

The grass is greener when we get
back to basics at T&S, okay?

Although one shoe,
which is what he wants to do.

That's insane!
That is insane.

One shoe.

But we do have to get back
to the core, you know,

of what T&S is,
you know what I'm saying?

Let me take a look
at your eyes.

Ow, God! Double rainbow,
let me look at your eyes.

What are you doing to my face?

What have you consumed?

You're wasted, right?
No, I'm not.

Listen, you're...
Are you stoned?

Come on, please, Crosby.

Is it...
What is that?

Can I have that?
Hey! Where did you get this?

My boss gave it to me.

Your boss gave you this?
Yeah.

Your boss gave you a lollipop.
Yeah, it's tangerine.

You see this?
It's tangerine.

Joel, taste it. It's tangerine.
I'm not gonna taste it.

Adam, do you know
what an edible is?

I know what
an Oedipal Complex is.

Joel got it. You don't even...
You're...

Buddy, you're high.

Edible marijuana.
That's what this is.

This is medicinal marijuana,
and I don't think you...

He drugged me?
Yes.

Seriously,
he slipped me a mickey?

I'm high.
You're high.

Why am I the only one that thinks that
this is an accident waiting to happen?

You don't.

Adam doesn't.

Haddie definitely doesn't.

I just know in my gut, Camille,

that I'm right about this.
I just do.

I just...

Well, I brought
Adam up here, Crosby,

Drew...

And now you, grandson.

And every time I'm up here,
it's just so beautiful.

I wish that my life had
that kind of clarity.

When I got back from Vietnam,
my life was a mess.

I was a mess.

Your grandmother,
she hung in there, though.

She just loved me, and...

She wouldn't let me go.

I think she saved my life.

Have we done everything
we're supposed to do?

We haven't had
our hot chocolate yet.

You said if I wasn't having a
good time, I could go home.

You're not having a good time?

No.

That's probably my fault.
I talk too much.

I just really want to go home.

Well, we got to finish
the marshmallows,

and we're gonna
count the stars.

I'm done with the marshmallows.

What about counting the stars?

I just want to go home!

Now!

I want to go home.
I want to go home.

Hey, Max.
I want to go home!

I want to go home!

I want to go home!
I want to go home!

Max!
I want to go home!

I want to go home! I want to go home!
I want to go home!

I want to go home!
I want to go home!

What historical time period
would you love to live in?

That one's so boring.
Let's skip it.

ANything that doesn't
have dirty, old back seats.

We're back.

Hi! Got room for two
more in the game?

I'm so sorry that I ruined your party.
I hope I didn't ruin it.

You didn't ruin
anything, girl. Sit down.

Can I play? Have a seat!
We've been having fun.

Okay, here's
the next question. Ready?

If you could bring
one fashion accessory

to a desert island,
what would it be?

A phone to call somebody to
get me off the desert island.

Why would you need a fashion
accessory on a desert island?

- I don't know, Mom, it's the game.
- I would bring a six pack.

I would do an eyelash curler.

See, eyelash curler.
Jasmine's playing the game.

Are these people
on the island?

Uh, hey, ladies.

Hey, the boys are here.

What are you...
What are you doing here?

You can't be here.
I know we can't.

Well, babe,
what is happening?

Are you okay?
Hi.

Hi.

Oh, God, can you get them
out of here, please?

Is everything okay?

- You look beautiful.
- Thank you.

Honey, what's wrong?
Why are you... Nothing.

This is not supposed
to happen right now.

Everything is not all right.

It's not all right?
It's not.

I mean, everybody's fine...
Okay.

As in safe. Just hold me.

Honey, what's wrong?
Just for a second.

- Are you okay?
- Is he okay?

Oh! He's fine. He's beyond fine.

- Adam!
- I'm so confused.

Adam, no... Okay, that's for
the guests of the party.

I'm just hungry, Julia.

Sorry.

Honey, I'm scared.
Of what?

Of us just splitting apart
at the seams.

We've never disagreed about
anything like this before.

He... He's a little more
paranoid than normal.

- Yeah.
- Why?

Because he's... He's baked.

'Cause I'm baked.

You're stoned?

Okay, I feel like I'm on grass.

My boss drugged me.

Huh?
My boss drugged me.

I'm not surprised.
And I wanted to see you.

So then my friends
brought me here.

I mean, they're my brother
and my brother-in-law.

That's so flattering.
That's so sweet.

Julia, these are really good.

Oh, thank you.

Do you have any more?
No, I don't.

These are delish! Come on, Julia!
No, I can't believe...

Did you make them?
Yes.

- You're a good cook.
- In the kitchen.

Ah, the kitchen!

Whoo!

Awesome!

Hi.
Hi. How's your party?

Fabulous.

Ah!

Oh, Adam, no,
that's not for you. Oh!

You guys, these
crab cakes are orgasmic.

Thank you. I worked really
hard on those, but...

Hey, Tory...
Cory.

Cory told me you quit.

I... Yeah.

I just want you to know that I support
whatever you choose to do next,

'cause you are, like, the
great wandering Braverman.

And I love you, okay?
Thanks.

Who wants pizza?

Okay, why don't you guys take
Adam home and order some pizza?

Because if you happened to read the
embossed invitation, this is...

This is
a female-only evening.

This event is girls only.

Julia, look at him.

Julia, I am never leaving this kitchen.
Me neither.

I am hungry, and this is
the best food ever.

Uh-oh! Braverman
favorite pastime!

It's time to open
the presents now.

It's a house of fun.

Oh, no, be my
boyfriend, Mom, let's go.

This is so weird.

I'm not dancing.
Here you go.

- You are so weird.
- Who are you?

Princess Leia.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
My crotch is vibrating.

- Honey, it's your phone.
- Honey.

Nothing's vibrating there.

I got... I got it.

Holy crap, it's Dad.

Honey, I should talk to him.

No, honey.
I've got it, I've got it.

I've got it, I'm okay.
I've got it.

Hey, can we
turn down the music?

It's Dad.
It's probably about Max.

Hold on, hold on, okay.

- You shouldn't let him answer it.
- I know I shouldn't.

- Hello.
- Hey, Sonny.

Oh, boy, do we have a problem.

What?
Max wants to come home.

Well, what's the problem?

Well, look, kid, I did everything
he wanted to do, all right?

I mean, we got here,
he wanted to look for bugs

before we pitched
the tent, I did that.

He wanted to have
the marshmallows

before we counted
the stars, I did that.

Come on, I've done
everything he wanted to do.

Yeah. Dad, you gave him his
paycheck before he did his work.

You have to do it
the other way around.

Okay, don't tell me.

That's in Kristina's
instruction manual, isn't it?

Yeah. You have to read that manual right now.
I want to talk to Max.

Cover to cover.
I told him that. Yeah, sure.

Max, your dad
wants to talk to you.

There you go.

Hey, Max.
Uh-huh?

Hey, buddy, what's the problem?

I... I just really
want to go home.

- Wants to go home.
- Oh, honey, then let him.

Let him.
I'll go pick him up.

Max, I tell you what.

If you want to come home,
you absolutely can.

Yeah.
But if you do,

you're gonna miss
something really special.

What?

In the morning,

when the sun comes up on the creek,
all the lacewings come out.

Hundreds of them, thousands.

And do you still have
that specimen jar with you,

the one that Mom
packed for you?

Yeah, I've got it.
Okay.

Do you want to collect some, put them
in a jar, and then bring them home?

Yeah.
Okay.

Well, the decision is yours,

but I know I would really like to
see a couple of those bad boys.

Okay, we can stay.

As the blackbird in the spring

'Neath the willow tree.

Sunshine came along with thee

And flowers in her hair

I'm so excited to see him.

- Hey!
- Hi, guys.

Whoo-hoo!
- All right. Max. Hey.

Hi, buddy.

Look. I caught 40 of them.

Really? You did it.
Forty? Wow.

All right. Those are...
What are these called?

Lacewings.
Lacewings.

Lacewings?
Yes.

They're like
little grasshoppers.

No, no, they're not
like grasshoppers at all.

Okay, let's get you inside
and get you cleaned up.

No, I don't want to get cleaned up.
Honey, it's really...

Max, they look great.
Say thanks to grandpa.

Thanks, Grandpa.

Mmm-hmm.

Well, Grandpa?

You did it.
You took Max camping.

Yeah, yeah, I sure did.

Had a few hiccups there.

Mmm-hmm.

Thanks for the assist.

That's what I'm here for.

Man...

I got a better idea of what
you and Kristina go through.

Yeah, well, he can be
a handful, that's for sure.

That's why we sent that
instruction manual along.

Yeah.

Hope you guys had a good time.

He's a wonderful boy.

Hi.
Hi.

Hey, Adam?
Yeah?

Haddie's...

Hey.
Hey.

Hey.

Uh, thanks for bringing
my clothes over.

Oh, you're welcome.

Uh, okay, well, I...

I feel really stupid about telling
you that I choose Alex over you.

It's ridiculous. I mean...

It's okay. It's fine.

I love you guys.
I miss you.

I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry

that I said some mean
and stupid things to you.

But also, you know,
you guys have to know

that you're wrong about Alex.

And I am not sorry
that I moved out,

and I want you to know

that I'm gonna stay at grandma
and grandpa's officially.

Well, the young
sportsman is asleep.

Mmm.

Mrs. Trussell, look at this.
Well, well, where did this come from?

Just one of my gifts that I didn't
get a chance to open last night.

Oh, boy.
Mmm-hmm.

Do you have any more
that you want to show me?

Oh, yeah.
Ooh, can I see?

Shall I do a little lingerie
fashion show for you?

Yes, please.

Oh, boy.

All right. You ready?

Life is good.

Mmm! Mmm-hmm.
I'm feeling it.

What do you think of that?

Mmm! Delicious.

And how about this one?

Yeah, that color
makes your whatever pop.

All right.

Hey.

Hey, honey.

You okay?

You know, my mom ran away
with my dad when she was 16.

Yeah, I forget
she was that young.

He made her so miserable
every single day of her life.

Haddie is not gonna run off
and get married to Alex.

You don't know that, honey.
You should see how she looks at him.

You have no idea.

Kristina, we're not gonna
lose our daughter.

Okay?

I just don't know what to do.

I don't know
what to do right now.

Neither do I.

All I know is
I miss our little girl,

and I want her to come home.

Me too.