Orange Is the New Black (2013–…): Season 3, Episode 11 - We Can Be Heroes - full transcript

Caputo and Piper confront labor issues. A miracle occurs in Norma's group. Crazy Eyes's erotica winds up in the hands of the staff.

Are you wondering how healthy the food you are eating is? Check it -
Say it.

- Say it!
- You're the man.

Oh, you're the man!



Your place depresses me.

The walls
are sticky with loneliness.

I'm disgusted with myself...

...every time.

Why am I fucking you?

You fancy yourself
a nice guy, Joe.

But you're not. You're a deeply
angry and resentful man...

...because the world
hasn't appreciated you

the way you think you deserve.

And right now, there's no one
you resent more than me.

So in fucking me,
you get a small leak

in that overinflated
resentment balloon.

And it gives you some relief.

I've given this some thought.

- Feels good, doesn't it?
- See you next Tuesday.

See you next Tuesday.

I see what you did there.

The NFFE said they can't help us
now that we're private,

and a lot of the big unions
won't rep security workers.

So what's our option?

We form our own.

That's the lamest union ever.

- We'll have no power.
- We got no power now.

This one time in middle school,
I staged a walkout, all right,

to get more pizza days.

Got suspended for two days.

The squeaky mouse is cat food.
All right?

I'm just saying.

What the fuck is going on here?

We're unionizing.

That's the boss, dummy.

It's Caputo.
He's one of us.

Our new private overlords
nixed our union memberships.

Fine print
in the startup paperwork.

Sneaky bastards.

Same size as the rest
of the print.

Clearly stated.

- You knew about this?
- Yeah.

Because, unlike the rest of you,

I actually read something
before I sign it.

How about you
count your blessings

that you all got rehired?

Could be bagging groceries
down at the Stop & Shop.

I am bagging groceries
at the Stop & Shop.

Every weekend.

Yeah, I work security
at Riverside Mall.

This troll manager at Best Buy
says I'm lacking people skills,

but, really, I think he's
just threatened by my height.

Okay. I get it.

I get that
this is a financial strain.

Listen, guys.
We're six weeks in.

You got to prove
that you're valuable

before you can
start demanding shit.

- They've turned you.
- Corporate wonk.

Pod person.

Okay, Norma Rae.
Out of my way.

I need a goddamn cup of coffee.

These are work hours.

Rabble-rouse on your own time.

Let's go! Come on!

And the 175-pound weight class

goes to
the Richmond Wolverines!

A hero is not just a guy
who runs into burning buildings.

It's also a person
who shows us what it means

to be a decent human being.

Now, none of youse agreed
to wrestle that kid from Central today,

Kendall... something.

I get it.

It's embarrassing
to grapple with...

The coach tells me his one dream
in life is to wrestle.

And who stepped up?

Our number-one seed,
Joey Caputo.

He didn't have to.

Joey's got nothing to prove.

But he still volunteered.

Now, that is a hero.

Look at that kid.

Look how happy he is.

Hey, special kids
got feelings, too, right?

I'll let him feel
like he's really doing it.

You're a good man, Joey.

And next up,
we have an exhibition match

between two very special wrestlers,

Joseph Salvatore Caputo
and Kendall Barnes.

Let's give them
a big round of applause.

I'm a champion!
I'm a champion!

You're amazing.

No. He is.

All right.
Go easy on me, buddy.

No way.

I'm a champion!
I'm a champion!

Fuck. There goes States.

There you go.
This is for all of us.

Great. Thanks.

You must stand at count
under code 3-2-0.

Hey, Space Admiral.

Double shocker.

Back in your bunks.

- Rice?
- Yeah?

Sara Rice?

I got your pack-out clothes
and your release paperwork.

What are you waiting for?
You want out or not? Get moving.

Who do they think you are?

Someone with my same last name.

See, it's her name
with my ID number.

That new guard
don't know anybody.

She thinks it's me.

Holy shit.
This is a miracle.

Praise Norma!

Is she maxing out?

Yep. Sara Rice is out of here,
no strings.

Free Rice.

I'm starting to feel bad.

Fuck that bitch.

You really think
they'll let me out?

There's only one way to know.
You got to try.

If they let me go,
then I'm gone.

Oh, Lordy.

- What's that?
- Nothing.

You know,
I never thought about it,

but you and the Admiral share
some definite similarities.

What's this whole
"Admiral" thing?

Why does everyone
keep calling me that?

Give me that.

- Give me this.
- Don't lose my place!

All right?

This is fucking crazy.

Oh, God! Not again.

I'm not gonna hurt you.

You just stay right there.

Okay. I'm not moving.


I just, I just want to say
that I'm sorry.

I'm... I feel bad.

I did not mean to hit you.

Oh, it, it kind of felt
like you did.

Are you gonna dime on me?

I mean, I know you don't have
a whole lot of reason not to,

but... I was hoping
that you could see

that my apology is sincere.

Let me make it up to you personally

and not end up in Seg
or down the hill.

Is this some kind of enhanced
interrogation technique?

Who sent you?


I'm gonna come clean.

I'm not NSA.

I'm CIA.

Oh, you expect me
to believe that?!

It's complicated.

May I?

What they don't know is,

and by "they"
I mean, you know, "they,"

like the real "they",

is that
I'm actually a double agent.

And they don't know?!

That is
why I had to beat you up,

to throw them off track.

If they find out we're working
together, they'll take me out.

Oh, and if they get to you,
they can redouble you.

Turn you back.

- Exactly.
- Oh!

That is why
we can't call attention

to our little incident.

There's a lot at stake here.

I need your silence so
that we can continue the work.

Yeah, man.

And thank you,
for getting me that Vagisil,

'cause this was just so itchy.

Thank you.


Now you got to really
get me the Vagisil,

you know, like,
so that we can, you know,

just to cover up the...

On it.

Yo. Where are my doughnuts?

Not today.

Oh, girl.

Did I not tell you to suck a dick
and get me some goodies?

Chop-chop, little lady.

What's the matter with you?

My stomach just hurts today.

I don't feel like talking
about snack foods.

Besides, I'm getting
real presents from him now.

Isn't that pretty?

You know, like,
on the commercial

where the husband
surprises the wife?

"Every kiss begins with Kay"?


No offense, but that looks
like some 99-cent-bin shit.

And it's gonna turn
your wrist green.

Look, it,
it already has, see?

What the fuck?

- What happened?
- Nothing.

You're just jealous.

'Cause it's gold-plated
with real gold.

- Did he hurt you?
- No.

You know sometimes when,
when men get around boobies,

they don't know how to act.

It's called hormones and stuff.

But I don't know
if you know about that

'cause you're a muff muncher.

Did he force you?

Well... I'm not gonna lie.

I mean, I could have used
a bit of a warm-up.

Doesn't feel really good
when you're not ready.

You know there's a word
for that, right?


No, it's not his fault.
I was the one.

I was flirting too much,
I was smiling,

and I was really confusing.

Take that shit
off your wrist right now.

He made a special trip
to the mall for me.

It's not his fault.


I just convinced Lolly
that I was a CIA operative

so that she wouldn't rat on me

for attempting
to choke her to death.

Pipes, I'm losing it.

lam totally spinning out.

Well... like the Kinks say,
"Paranoia, the destroy-a."

Well, "There is a red
under my bed...

...and a little yellow man
in my head."

Sounds like
it's getting pretty bad.

I beat the shit
out of a crazy person.

I imagine my death by shanking
every waking minute, and...

...l completely convinced myself

that you were hooking up
with that Stella chick.

She has a Ninja Turtle tattoo.

I know.

And that annoying
dingo-fucker accent.

Please tell me
I have nothing to worry about.

You have nothing to worry about.

I'm sorry I've been so crazy.

Forgive me?

I forgive you.

What happened to you?

None of your business.

It was that fucking tranny,
is what happened.

- Céllate.
- People should know.

You didn't get locked up
with a bunch of women

so you could get beat on
by a man.

I don't know
what's going on with that dude,

but he's raging out.

Who? Sophia?

She don't cause no problems.

There's something wrong
with that he/she/whatever.

Maybe his hormones are off.

He attacked Gloria.

This is
a dangerous fucking situation.

None of us are safe.

Better watch where you're going.

Don't forget, ladies.

Your usual meal
is 1,500 calories.

Ladies, I was missing a panty
drop in my bunk this morning.

Sorry, kiddo.

- Talk to our rep.
- What are you talking about?

We're exercising our
collective bargaining rights.

If you want to renegotiate
our contract,

she's right over there.

What's going on?

We don't work for ramen no more.

Fair pay for skanky pants.

Yeah. What she said.

Come back to me with
a better deal, and we'll talk.


Okay. You have
$40 left on your commissary.

Here's a check
for the remainder.

Sign the back,
and we'll give you cash.

There's a voucher
for your bus ticket.

Fingerprints, please.

Sign here.

Hey, stranger.

Are you avoiding me?


Care to elaborate?

I... don't know what to say.
I have a--

- An Alex?
- Yes, I have... Alex.

Right. Well, I'm crossing
the picket line here, but...

...l've outdone myself.


Let me know when you want more.

I-I've been waiting
at my bunk all morning

for someone to come get me.

What time do I get to leave?

What are you talking about?

I'm supposed to be
released today.

I-I gave away all my shit
and everything.

You know anything about the
inmates processing out today?

They left after count.

What about Sara Rice?

Yep. They took her, too.

Then why is
she standing in front of me?

I don't... I don't know.

It's a miracle.

She got out out of the blue?

'Cause she believed.

Yo, Norma!
You gotta hook a sister up!

She can do it for all of us.

I have faith.
Don't you?

Praise Norma!
Praise Norma!

I brought you these.

Here's a-a-a, a pencil...

...and a can of mackerel.

I'm being bullied by your group.

I thought you should know that.

Oh, look, everyone.

It's God's gift to Litchfield.

Shut up, Leanne.
I'm talking to Norma.

Look at her with her perfect
teeth and her shiny skin

and her Pocahontas hair,
thinking she's better than us.

I can't help it
if I have Pocahontas hair,

and it's not my fault
you chose meth over teeth!

Get the fuck out of here

- you stuck-up bitch!
- Oh, my God!

How could you let this happen?

I thought you were
supposed to be about kindness.

You made me think that you care,
but you don't.

And you let a bunch of crazies
speak for you.

Shut the fuck up, Sosa'.!

And you're all just a bunch
of chickenshit followers!

Now I can't help you.

Get out of here, seriously.

Nice group you got here.

Congrats on nothing.

Don't worry.
I'll handle this.

- Which one are you?
- I'm Space Admiral Rodcocker.

It was originally Donaldschlong.

I think I might have made
a mistake by changing it.

I see why you were disturbed.

Yeah, and I don't know
how she knew about my birthmark.

This is some sick stuff, Warren.

Look, a writer
does not search out a muse.

A muse appears.

And when that muse
wears uniform pants

that fit in all the right
places, it writes its--

Okay. That's fine.

How did you come up with all
this pornography stuff, anyway?

I wrote it for Berdie's class.

Counselor Berdie Rogers,
she told you to write this?

It was an exercise.

She wanted us
to use our imaginations.

Oh. This is the kind of stuff
you do in drama class?

Well, not really.

Berdie is more supportive
of the murder stuff

than she is the sex stuff.


I knew there was
something wrong with that woman.

Hey. So, you're getting out,
huh? Lucky.

But I thought
you had a butt-load more time.

- Nope.
- No?

Doggett here
don't want to get out

'cause she'd miss me too much.
Ain't that right, Doggett?

Hey, can you pull in here?

So, just like that?
I can go?

That's how it works.

Okay, then.

Peace out, Penn.

I'm sorry about all that shit
with Leanne.

I always liked you anyway.

Thanks, Ang.

Hey. Ain't your name Sara?


I call her Ang 'cause she
reminds me of Angelina Jolie.

Don't you think?

- I don't see it.
- I do.

Whatever. Bye, Sara.

Bye, Penn. Good luck.

Attention, all passengers.

Call the van.
Tell them to turn around.

What do you mean,
"They're not answering"?

Who is it, Coates?

Don't call the station.

I'll handle that.
Get a message to Pearson.

Tell him
I need to see him immediately.

Thank you.

Sara Rice
has been dropped at the bus.

Fuck! Fuck!

How does this happen?

The computer assigned her name
to Angie's ID Number.

This is MCC'S fancy new system.

We, we got to call
their IT guy.

Why didn't anyone catch this?

New COs.

They don't know the inmates,

or, apparently,
how to check a photo ID.

It's a huge fuckup.

This wouldn't have happened
with senior staff.

Christ, I can tell you how many
times a day Flores takes a dump.

I know when Warren is just excited
versus having an episode.

And these newbies, they don't
even bother to learn names.

Should we contact the marshals?

No. Give me a minute.

Maxwell, not a word of this.

You know everybody here.

- Who's in for organized crime?
- Me.

Nah. I need to pick the brain
of a real criminal,

somebody who's...
more hardcore.


I worked with the Russian mafia.

We make the Italians
look like guppies.

This about
your little panty business?

How do you know about that?

You recruited my whole family.

They're all running the track
in pink bikinis.

First, you don't ask me
to wear them,

and now you undervalue
my criminal mastermind.

You know what? You really
need to go fuck yourself.

I need your advice.

- I want 10 percent off the top.
- What?!

Your girls are rebelling.

You're paying them in sodium and
MSG, and they want real money.

You haven't a clue
how to do that.

And as for your one real
resource, your partner,

well, you're fucking around on her.

So it's only a matter of time
before that blows up in your face.

Don't fuck where you eat
or shit where you fuck.

It's bad business.

Eight percent.

You need to get money
into their commissaries

and pay your girls a fair wage.

- Huh?
- Mm-hmm.

You know what Green Dot
Moneypack cards are?

- No.
- No, of course you don't.

They're cash top-up cards.
You're gonna need a cellphone.

Well, where am I
gonna get a cellphone?

Oh, the place
is crawling with them.

I found one
in the bathroom once.

Cellphones are like roaches.

You see one, you know
there's another hundred

hidden in the walls.


There were five other inmates
in there with the wrong numbers.

This is
the same operating system

we use at all of our prisons.

Yeah. Well,
you're lucky you caught it now,

because, clearly, it blows.

Yeah. This is bad.

This is really bad.

I-I can't protect you
on this one, Joe.


You're in charge of camp.

Shows a big lack of oversight.

Yeah. It does.

'Cause the fish
stinks from the head.

And I am not the head.

I am actually
down by the gills somewhere.

So once I call the police
and the US Marshals,

and the DOC Investigator
starts sniffing around,

it's going to look a lot worse

for the Director of Human
Activity here at Litchfield.

- Yeah. Whoa. Slow down.
- Yeah!

Why do we have to involve
all those people in this?

We have an escaped convict.

Let's just go get her back.


You and me.
Where did they take her?

The bus station in Utica.

Let's just get in a car.

We'll go get her,
bring her back.

You know, nobody has to know.

So you're saying the two of us

should go and apprehend
an escaped convict?

This is not the fucking
Bloodhound Gang, okay?

I don't know what to do.

I honestly don't know
what the fuck to do!

Do you know how I got this job?

My dad
is one of the SVPs at MCC.


This is gonna be worse

than when I got kicked out
of Ohio University.

I have no idea what I'm doing.


L'll go.

- On my own.
- Yeah?

Someone needs to stay here
and keep a lid on things.

- Great.
- Fuck it.

If I can get her back and no one
needs to know, all the better.

Y-you're saving my ass, Joe.


I'm saving my ass.

Here's to the new opening act

for the east coast tour
of Glass Tiger.

- Hell, yeah!
- All right?

Soon to be the headliners!
The Jeff Spurber Band!

- We need a new name.
- I like our name.

Of course you like our name.
You're Jeff Spurber.

But you're
the tambourine player, dude.

I'm the lead singer.

If we're gonna be named
for someone, it should be me.

- It's my garage-
- Hey.

If Hank and I can get along
after the shit he pulled,

you guys can work it out.

We're looking
at ten months on the road.

Let's enjoy it.

Come on! This is
a huge fucking deal for us.

Come on! Come on!

- Lis.
- Hank.

Joey, you got a second?

- Can we talk outside?
- Yeah, baby.

Are you, are you sure?

Four months.

So it's...
it's a real thing, huh?

Floating around in there?

How big is it?

Like an avocado.


An avocado.

It's great. It's great.

Lisa, we're gonna have a baby.

Joey, do the math.


Four months ago,
we were broken up.

I was with Hank.

Four months ago was July.
What are you...

What are you saying?

It's his?


Does he know?

I wanted to tell you first.

I've been so guilty about
everything I put you through,

and now that we're
back together, I...

This is so fucked up.

You have every right to hate me.

I love you.

I just thought you should know

because you guys
are going on tour and--

I won't go.
I'll stay here.

You have to go!
This is your big break!

That's not why I told you.

Fuck it.
They can do it without me.

- Fuck it.
- Joey, you can't do that.

We'll be fine. I'm gonna move
back in with my parents.

I already asked
for more shifts at Paddy's.

I'm staying here.

I'm gonna take care of you...
and this baby.

- I'll tell them right now.
- You stay and Hank goes?

Joey, why would you do that?
It makes no sense.

I love you.

L-I want to marry you.

I want to have a family
with you. Hey.

Me and you... and avocado.

Aleida is full of shit
sometimes, but I believe her.

I do, too. They said she tried
to chop it off herself.


Oh, I heard she's off her meds,
and her penis is growing back.

I heard
she was an Ultimate Fighter

before she turned into a chick.

Well, you heard wrong.

But I will happily
go all UFC on your ass

if you keep spreading that shit.


Where did you get that weave, girl?

Don't tell me
you went to Danita.

I thought I'd switch it up.

- She ain't bad.
- Ain't bad?

I can see those tracks
from down the hallway.

Look, other people
got to make a living, too.

My salon has been empty all clay.

You think I don't know
those Spanish girls

been spreading shit about me?

I don't want to get involved.

What's wrong with you?
What's wrong with all of you?

Acting like a... like a bunch
of stupid transphobic bitches!

You know what the worst part
of becoming a woman is?

Having to participate in
this catty backstab-y bullshit!

You don't want to
get your hair done?

You want to whisper
behind my back?

Then fuck you!

Fuck all of you!

We're in business.

- No way. Whose?
- Mm-hmm. I have no idea.

There's probably
50 of them in here.

This place
is crawling with contraband.

You know,
I found a blunt, a lighter,

and a shank
made out of Jolly Ranchers.

Why do you need a phone?

To transfer money.

Each girl is gonna get
a prepaid card on the outside,

give me a 14-digit code,

and then I can wire money
directly into her account

with the touch of a button.

It's called Moneypak.

Yeah, I know what it's called.
I'm a drug dealer.

this is what prison gangs do.

I know.
It's brilliant, right?


This was a silly distraction

so we could have some fun
and make a few bucks.

What you're talking about now
is a crime network. Okay?

This is the kind of shit
that landed me in here.

So you'll be extra good at it.

I'm serious, Pipes.

I'm not up for taking
this thing next level.

What happened
to that scary professional felon

I fell in love with, huh?

She was so hot.

Seriously? Grow up.

Put one between your knees
and one under your belly. Here.

Why you being so nice?

'Cause I know where you're at.

And, listen, when your
real contractions start,

you got to just surrender.

'Cause the more you fight
that shit, the worse it gets.

And it also helps if you moan.

Low, low like a cow, like...

I don't know why, but something
about opening your throat

makes everything else
open up, too.

And pushing
feels like shitting,

like you're taking a giant shit.

That's so gross!

And when they tell you
that they can see the head,

you got to back off.

- The head?
- Yeah.

And you got to go slow

so that you don't tear
your shit up, you know?

S-stop it, stop it. I don't even
want to think about that.

I'm just glad
everything's gonna be over soon.

Not really.

You're gonna have a baby
for the rest of your life.

No. I'm giving it away.


To who?

To this lady
who's been visiting me.

She's really nice,
has a lot of money,

and my mom
thinks I should do it, so...


What are you, fucking crazy?

It ain't right for me to keep a
baby if I'm not gonna be around.

So you're saying
I did the wrong thing, huh?

You don't even
get to see her anymore.

Yeah. But at least I know
that she's with her family.

I would give anything to see
my baby for five minutes,

and you're
gonna give yours away?!

To a stranger?!

You know,
I may be a fucked-up mom,

but at least I didn't sell mine
to the highest bidder.

Yo, give me
my fucking pillow back.

I hope she rips you wide open.

What happens if they fire us

before we get officially
approved as a union?

Or, so they don't get sued,
they start enforcing weird rules.

You know? Pin it on that.
These guys are wily.

This is how corporations
been intimidating people

since the beginning of time.

You know, people died
for the eight-hour workday, man.

"Not being heard
is no reason for silence."

That's deep.

It's from Les Miz.

We watched it last night.

Poor Russell Crowe.

The guy sings like a dead carp
getting a blowjob.

- What about a blow job?
- We're having a union meeting.

Oh, that sounds like
a lot less fun.

If you knew what was good
for you, you'd join us.

Don't see any need
to rock the boat.

No, no.
Come to a meeting at least.

No, thanks.

It's at Freddy's Bar.

$2 shots if you use
the code word "union."

Well, in that case...
what do we want? Jager.

When do we want it?

This is insane!

It's not insane, Joe.

It's... it's plucky.

- Right.
- And don't worry about camp.

I'm handling shit over here.

There's a new sheriff in town.

I'm cracking heads,
taking names.

I thought you were
just holding down the fort.

Well, yeah. Apparently the fort has been
corrupted by one Berdie Rogers.

This is surprising to me.

Well, the stuff she's
encouraging in her class,

I mean, after
the sexual-harassment training,

we just can't tolerate this.

Please hold off.
We need to review.

Already taken care of, buddy.

You're a good man, Joe Caputo.

Probably, probably too
good for the job you're doing.

Last call for
the express bus to New Haven.

The Olympics
have been on here 24/7.

I'm partial to the diving myself.

You seen that 13-year-old
Chinese kid win the high dive?

Fu something?

Amazing shit. Boy.

It's the parents that kill me
when I watch the coverage.

You got kids?

I've got one on the way.

- Congratulations.
- Yeah, thanks.

That's why I took the job,
for the benefits.

Well, you get decent coverage.

Vision and dental's a little
spotty, but better than nothing,

especially if you got
a little one coming.

Sorry about the smell.

It's the pipes.
They don't fix shit around here.

Come on.
This is the TV room.

There's lots
of fighting over the channel,

so each group gets their time.

Rosa here knows the drill.

The whites
got the mornings till 10:00.

Then the blacks and the Spanish
take over at lunch.

Keeps rotating like that.

But me?

I watch what I want
when I want to.

You like wrestling?

Oh, yeah.
Uh, I used to compete.

I-I dislocated my shoulder.
That ended that.

So that could have been you.

I guess.

In a parallel universe.

Parallel universe.

That's good.

Come on.
Let me show you the dorm.

That is a huge
moment for Anthony Vucko.

All right, ladies.

I've heard your complaints,
and I have made arrangements

for everybody to get paid,
cash money.

Someone on the outside
will pick up a cash card.

Get me the number,

and then we'll start depositing
funds into your accounts.

I'm offering you
eight bucks a pair,

and I'm holding you all
to quality control.

There is no cutting corners.

What about benefits? Huh?

- Benefits?
- Yeah.

Yeah. What about all the
flavor packets?

We are full-time employees.

All right, everybody gets one chicken
and one beef a week until I'm out.

I don't want to wear
the bikinis anymore.

They ride up my butt.

And Jones will only be
wearing boy shorts.

I want a thong.

Jesus Christ.
Anybody else?

Good. Congratulations.

You are all now
official employees.

We're in the money!

You can all thank me for that.

Oh, and, Flaca...
you're fired.

- What?
- Oh, shit.

You can't do that.

I can do whatever I want.
Get out.

And, remember,
you will be costing

each one of your closest friends
hundreds of dollars a month

if you so much
as open your mouth.

So I suggest
that you leave quietly.

You're fucked up.


Yard time in ten minutes.

Heard you got busted.

Healy was mad.

He confiscate it?

Yo, fuck him, man.

Start over.
Or write a sequel.

Make it a three-parter
like Hunger Games.

No. I feel lighter.

You know, all those fans
with their ideas,

my head was gonna explode.

So you're quittin'?

Whatever, then.

A Dorm inmates,
yard time in ten minutes.

I don't think
the people even like me.

They just like my story.

You don't like me.

Yeah, true.
But that ain't my fault.

I mean, you beat the shit out
of me, cracked one of my ribs.

I got a right to hold a grudge.

Nah, I was protecting Vee.

Vee didn't need protection.

Vee was a thug.
She preyed on you.

You think I'm stupid.

I think you're vulnerable.

Yeah? Well...

...Vee treated me like a person.

Everybody else
thinks I'm a joke.

And she loved me.

People need love.

I know.

I'm sorry I hurt you.

Heard you're
in a bit of hot water.

Temporary leave while MCC does
an independent investigation.

I had nothing to do
with that erotica.

She wrote it for your class.

No, she thinks
she wrote it for my class

because that's the way
children think.

I've worked with a lot of kids
in the foster system.

She's functioning
like a six-year-old.

A perverted six-year-old...
but a six-year-old.

You know, it takes a long time

to find the boundaries
with these girls.

And it's not for everyone.

This is what you wanted,
isn't it?

You've had it in for me
since I started here.

I merely passed along

that was brought to me.

What exactly is your real issue?

See, I-I-I can't quite pin down
whether you're a misogynist

or a racist or a winning
combination of the two.

You foster
inappropriate relationships.

You walk around here
like you own the place.

You come in here every week
with a different hairstyle.

And your class is a festering
incubator of deviance!

You're a vengeful little man,
aren't you?

But I'll be back...

...because I am good
at what I do.


Let's go, Rice.

Can I finish my soda?

Come on, man.

You're about to take me
back to prison.

What the fuck
are you still doing here?

I didn't know where to go.

I only got a voucher to Jersey,
and I don't know anyone there.

I guess I should have walked
to the Amtrak station,

but I only got 40 bucks.

Did it not occur to you
that we'd come after you?

I don't know.

I kept a pet frog
in the laundry for eight months,

and no one ever noticed.

Things are always crazy
over there.

But freedom feels weird.

I guess I'm not very good
at this whole escaping thing.

I could run.

You don't got a gun or nothing?

You didn't bring any cops?

Yeah, well, you can come with
me now without an argument

and spend a few nights in Seg,

or I can call the cops
and take you back forcibly,

in which case
you leave me no choice

but to charge you
with attempted escape

and extend your sentence.

I'm doing you a solid here.

I ain't gonna say "thank you."

Well, you should.

So, you want to look
like a big shot, huh?

Get all the glory yourself?

Come on. Let's go.
Up and at 'em.

You tell me one person
would have turned down

the opportunity I got,
one person.

I do see your point.

What if I suck your dick?

You're still going back.

Come on. Let's go.

So, is that a "yes" or a "no"?

No, thank you.
Let's go.

A frog?

We named him Benny,

but then he suffocated,
and he died.

That's what happens in prison.

Oh, my God.


There's the man of the hour.

Encyclopedia Brown and the Case
of the Missing Meth Addict.


Well, she's in the SHU.

Poor kid.

I can't blame her.

We got lucky this time.

It could have been a lot worse.

I don't know
what I can do to thank you.

I want my guys back full time.

I want their old hours back.

And they need medical.

I've heard rumblings about union stuff.
Are you in on that?

It's not a matter
of being in on it or not.

You want employees
to show up and do a good job,

you, you got to
take care of them.

I get it.

I mean, everybody has
a right to organize,

but if MCC
has to start covering benefits,

the whole venture's gonna fold.

I mean,
it's shortsighted, you know?

We're all gonna be out of work.

Are you being straight with me?

Or is that
just union-busting jargon?

I don't know about you,
but I like having a job, Joe.

L-I respect that you look out
for the underdog.

It seems like you're the kind
of guy who does that a lot,

but how's that
working out for you?

I don't know.

Have you seen my car?

Maybe it's time you stopped
worrying about everybody else

and did something for you.

That's what everybody else
in America does.

It took me an hour
to her get down.

She's stubborn as fuck.

What's this?

You going somewhere?

Hank's back in town.

They came home
to record a new album.

Did you know
they sold out their last tour?


They're crushing it.

He came by yesterday.

He wanted to see her.

Now he wants to see her.

Joey, he's her father.

I'm her father.

I'm the one who stuck around.

He's her real father.

He has a right to have
a relationship with her.

You're leaving me for Hank.

He's doing really well
for himself.

They made a big chunk of change
on that Warner's deal.

- He has ambition.
- And I don't?!

I love him.

I always have.

You know that.

I want to see
if we can be a family.

You have a family.

- I'm your family.
- Joey...

I really appreciate
everything you've done for us,

and I couldn't have done it
without you.

And I love you, too.

But... it's different.

I started that band.

Those guys wouldn't have
even know each other

if it wasn't for me.

I gave up everything.

I took a job...
in a prison, for fuck's sake.

Didn't know
you were running a tab.

Do you know how depressing
my life is?!

You think I want to work
a security job

for $20,000 a year?!

I did this for you!

No one asked you to.

- I was clear all along.
- I saved you!

I didn't need saving!

You'd still be slutting it up
down at Paddy's

if it wasn't for me.

That was ugly, Joe.

Take some responsibility
for your choices.

Nobody got you here but you.

You can't spend your whole life
holding the door open for people

and then being angry
when they don't thank you.

Nobody asked you
to hold the fucking door!

You woke up the baby.

There you go.

What's all that for?

Well, l...
I want you to go down on me.

What? Hell, no.
That's disgusting.

Yeah, but I'm feeling horny,
so I'm buying you.

I got some M&Ms in there.

So let's go. Get me off.

- That's not funny.
- I'm not joking.

You're for sale, so I'm
purchasing your services.

Just, you know, check out.
Go to your happy place.

I'll be quick.

Stop that.

And maybe I'll sodomize you
while I'm at it.

You know, stick a hairbrush
up your ass, hold you down,

pull your hair,
maybe bite your neck.

Wouldn't that be fun?
You might like that.

Why don't you try it, huh?
Why don't you try that?

Just, you know, just let me
have my fucking way with you.

Hey, I could tie you up.

We could maybe use
your fucking T-shirt as a gag.

- Huh?
- Would you stop it?

I'm gonna do
whatever I fucking want to you,

and you're gonna lie down
and you're gonna take it,

because that's the way
this works, isn't it?

Isn't that it?

Stop that.

Stop it.

I want it to stop.

I want it to stop so bad.

I want him to stop.


'Cause we're gonna get
that motherfucker.


You should have seen her face.

I mean, I got them, they
were all practically drooling

over the money,

and then I turned to her
in front of everybody,

and I'm all,

"Oh, and by the way, Flaca,
you're fired."

That'll teach the little bitch
not to instigate.

- That's gross.
- No, it was bad-ass.

I'm out.


I don't want to be involved.

With what?
The business?

With any of it.

What you did to Flaca
was weird, Piper.

She's poor.

A lot of these girls, they're poor.

Of course
they were excited about money.

They're excited
about a $1 -an-hour job.


I don't like
this version of you.

Well, maybe I don't
like this version of you.

What version is that?

The paranoid, needy version.

The judge-y version.

I mean, fuck, Alex.
What is your problem?

You have no idea
what you're getting into.

You don't know
who these people are.

You don't know who
they're connected to.

And you're on
some weird little power trip.

I am doing exactly what you did,
and you cannot handle it

because you're afraid I might
be better at it than you are.

You probably are better
at it now.

You're a natural.

I'm out, Pipes.

I'm out of that, and...

...l'm out of this.

So, who's gonna rep us?

We need to elect a leader.

Well, I'd do it, but somebody
needs to explain to me

how the whole thing works.

Holy shit.

He's come around.

Now it's official.

What are you guys doing?

Do you really want to make
an enemy out of MCC?

You guys
got yourself all riled up

without really considering
what it is you're doing.

We're re-unionizing.

And it feels so good.

What are your exact grievances?


Have you rallied at least 30 percent
support from the employee base?

Have you gotten them all
to sign authorization cards?

How do you guys
expect to be taken seriously?

Shit. You do know
what you're talking about.

You should lead us.

That's a conflict of interest.

These corporate types
are a different breed.

They're hurting us.
They're hurting our families.

We need a leader.

We need you, man.

We do. We need you.

Well, for starters,
stop meeting in the break room.

Don't give them
a reason to squash you.

These guys are pros.

They will call a meeting.

It will seem optional,
but it won't be.

And once they have you captive,

they are going to feed you
a bunch of BS

about it
being a friendly workplace,

and then they are
going to use scare tactics

to try and convince you

that you're all
gonna lose yourjobs.

Don't fucking listen to them.

They need you
more than you need them.

So, you in?

I could be your guy.

I don't know about y'all,
but I feel a "hip, hip, hooray"

coming on right about now.

Please don't.

- No, it's coming.
- Oh, yeah.

- Hip. hip!
- Hooray!

Do you hear the people sing?

Singing the songs
of angry men?

It is the music of the people
who will not be slaves again

When the beating
of your heart

Echoes the beating of the drums

There is a life about to
start when tomorrow comes

Black people
don't know this song.

Do you hear the people sing?

Singing the songs
of angry men?

It is the music of the people
who will not be slaves again