One Tree Hill (2003–2012): Season 6, Episode 7 - Messin' with the Kid - full transcript

Nathan is happy again now that he's playing and actually staring in Smashball. So he reminds Haley that she's also supposed to have another go at her dream career - music. Jamie is bullied because of his 'childish' cape by Chuck Scolnik, the biggest kid in his playground. Haley's attempt to reason with his mother only leads to a cat-fight. Superdad finds a way to convince the whole class capes are almost as super-cool as he. Peyton's moving into Lucas' parental home starts confrontations when accused of taking over his space, leading to a weird divided house war. Mouth is welcomed back with his old promotion offer, plus an extra: intern - his ex Gigi, who now finds him sexually irresistible.

Previously on One Tree Hill.

Nate, Mike Wilson. Listen, I heard
you we looking for the opportunity... play ball again.

This is the coolest thing I've ever seen.
You have to do this, Daddy.


- This can't be good for my back.
- That can't be good for nobody's back.

- You're coming home?
- I guess I never really left.

Can you help me make a cape?

Quentin really likes mine, and I thought
maybe we could make one for him too.

Tell me where you live. I'm pretty
sure it's not in shop class.

- I live in a foster home.
- Interested in fostering a child?

Well, I guess it would depend
on the situation.

I've never had my own room before.

Luke, you should read this.
It's really cool.

LUKE: My book?
- No, it's an article...

...about moving in together.
It says we should have our own space... order to ease the transition.

Way ahead of you.

- What is that?
- Oh...'s your cage, silly.
I figured you need your own space.

Look, it's even got a little bed of hay.
I know how you like hay.

- Luke, cut it out.
- Come on. Get up, up.


Man, Brooke looks hot here.

Maybe you two could share
the cage, huh?




Funny, I don't remember
ordering bad Italian.

Sorry to bother you so late...

...but I caught you buying drinks
at the bar tonight.

I know the license is yours,
but she claims to belong to you too.


You have a 15-year-old daughter?

- How long has it been?
- Not long enough.


OWEN: You're welcome.
- Sam.

Can you just yell at me in the morning?

- I'm really tired.
- Oh. Wa...

I'll bet you are.

Being Brooke Davis is exhausting!

I miss Angie.

- Marvin?
- Millie, what are you doing in Omaha?


Oh, my God.
What are you doing here?

I had this horrible dream
where I lived far away from you...

...and every time I spoke
I'd say this awful catch phrase.

Only it wasn't a dream.
So I quit my job. Again.

- For me?
- For us.

Without you, Omaha just felt
cold and lonely.

Do you feel better now?

- Now I'm just cold.
- Get in here.



- Daddy can fly.
- Yes, he can.

I can't tell you how happy
it makes me to see you playing.

Thanks, baby.

It would make me happy
to see you play again.

You haven't been in the studio.

Too much has happened lately
to think about music.

The deal was we'd both go after
our dreams, remember?

Yeah, Mama. I like when you sing.

Oh, you do, huh?

I hope you don't think that I'm uncool

When I say that you're late for school

- Never mind.

- See you.
- Bye.

See you, buddy.

Hey, how did you sleep?

Not very well.

- Somebody hit me with a magazine.
- I'm sorry.

I was reading an article in B. Davis
magazine, and I had a bad dream.

- It's about moving in together.
- What's so scary about that?

Well, "Once you move in,
expect to find out... don't know each other
as well as you think."

That's ridiculous.

Everybody says we're like twins.

Okay. You're right.

And to make up
for the magazine attack...

...l'm making your
favorite breakfast.

Oh, really? French toast?

- Pancakes.
- Oh.


Sam, I made breakfast!


Come on.


- Ah! Cut it out.
- "Cut it out."

- Let go. You'll rip it.
- So? Then you'll have two stupid capes.

It's not stupid.
I wear it for my friend Quentin.

Then Quentin must be stupid.


Fight, fight, fight!

"Just because you move in,
don't expect his stuff to move out."

Apparently, guys don't like changing
anything when a woman moves in.

- That's not true.
- Oh, really?

Funny, yesterday,
when I was cleaning...

...I knocked over a picture
of you and Lindsey.

Ooh. I, uh...


I thought I got all those. I'm sorry.

I know I'm being silly. I just...

...feel like a guest in your house.
And I haven't unpacked any boxes.

I don't know where
to put anything.

Well, does the all-knowing magazine
have a fix...

...or does it just point out problems?

Let's see, it says:

"We should work it out
by communicating openly...

...compromising and focusing
on each other."

It doesn't just say
that we should have sex?


How about this, okay...

...neither one of us leaves...

...until you're completely
moved in. Okay?

Unless, that is, that my sugar mama
needs to work.

Oh, no, your sugar mama's
her own boss.

And she just gave me some time off.

Mm. Okay, then it's official...

...we are...

...on house arrest.

Haiku is a Japanese poem
which consists...

...of three lines of five, seven,
and five syllables, respectively.

A good example of this would be...



My friend, Brooke Davis...

...blowing through my class like wind.

Sam in trouble, no?


I hate school.

School was never my strong suit either.
It's a good thing we're both handsome.

What's wrong?

I got in a fight with Chuck Scolnik
because he teased me about my cape.

I know the Scolnik family.

You should tease him
about his alcoholic mother.

I just want him to leave me alone.

Yeah, I know the feeling.

I was teased when I was in prison.

About what?

The point is, as a Scott man...

...people are always
gonna be jealous of you.

It's a burden we have to live with.
Scott men...

...are inherently better
than most people.

Daddy too?

Especially your daddy.


I thought we were past dressing
to impress each other.

Do I need to toss my footie pajamas?

Well, if the alternative
is you sleeping naked, yes.


I'm going to the station
to beg for my old job.

- I hope they take me back.
- They'd be stupid not to.

You're a big TV star now with
your own catch phrase and everything.

I'm sorry I ever spent a minute
away from you.

You just said a mouthful.



Very funny.

I'm sorry I disrupted your class.

That's okay. I turned you into a haiku.


I take it things aren't going very well
with you and Sam?

She stole my ID last night
and snuck out.

When you asked me to take her,
I thought: Little Orphan Annie.

Instead of singing and dancing,
I have stealing and disappearing.

- Do you want me to talk to her?
- No.

No, I'll handle it.


How do I handle it?

Talk to her tonight
and lay down some ground rules.

She needs structure.

She's actually a really bright kid.


For you, I will try.

I need her to try too, you know?

Even if it's just a little.

I think that's totally fair.


I'll let you know how it goes.

Thank you, Brooke.

Yeah, thank me if I haven't
killed her by tomorrow.

- So where do you want to start?
- Well, that's easy.

I never feel at home
until I unpack my music.

Maybe we don't have to. We probably
have doubles of everything, right?

Actually, I don't like The Cure.

How can you not like The Cure?

Well, their music's depressing
and whiny.

Yeah. And if it could squint,
it would be you.

You realize the lyrics I spent
painting at the River Court...

...were Cure lyrics, right?
- Oh, yeah, I know. And I love the lyrics.

I hate the music.

I don't even know
who you are right now.

Come on, Peyton.
I'm just being honest.

There's gotta be things that I like
that you don't, right?

Yeah. Yeah, okay,
now that you mention it.

- Your tattoo.
- What about it?

Well, first off, it does not mean what
you think it does, because I looked it up.

Second, Brooke has
a very similar tattoo...

...near her lady business.
Now, if you'll excuse me...

...l'm gonna go take my Cure albums
where they'll be appreciated.

Like the trash?

You see? We are totally different.

Just like the article says.

Thanks a lot, Brooke.

Okay, "Friday I'm in Love"
isn't too bad.

It's nice in here.

How come we haven't moved
into the master bedroom?

- You mean my mom's room?
- No, I mean the master bedroom.

I mean, she gave you the house, right?


It would just be...

...too weird sleeping in here
as an adult.

- Who said anything about sleeping?
- Oh. Ho-ho-ho-ho.

- No. Definitely out of the question.
- Luke, we're adults...

...shouldn't we be in the adult room?

Who's asking?

You or B. Davis magazine, huh?

Whichever will get you to do it.

I would tell the magazine...

...that my room's bigger...
- Mm-hm.

...and I like it better.

And I would tell Peyton...


...that I would do anything for her.

Even something as creepy
as sleeping in my mom's room.

Then I guess I'm asking.

- Then I guess I'm moving.
- Mm-hm.



- I love your music.
- Thank you.

- Your album's one of my favorites.
- Oh, thanks.

I even have a slot reserved
in my CD case for your next record.

- There is gonna be a next record, right?
- I hope so.

I hope so too. Your voice is incredible.

You're not so bad yourself.
Do you have a CD I can buy?

No, I just do this for fun.

But it must be amazing
to sing for a living.

It used to be.

But so much has been going on lately,
music hasn't seemed to matter much.

That's too bad, because it matters
to a lot of other people.

It looks like your music matters
a lot too.

You don't wanna keep
your fans waiting.

Neither do you.


Hi, Chris. I wanted to talk
about how we left things.

Mike, just hear me out.

I know that Omaha's a bigger market,
but this is your home.

- I agree. Which is why...
- What will it take?

We need you.

Well, I could use an office...

...better snacks in the lunchroom...

...and I had an intern in Omaha.

- Done, done and done.
- Heh.

Thing is, we need you to start ASAP.
Like tomorrow.

What do you think?

- I think Omaha is gonna miss me.
- Yeah, ha-ha, terrific.

Hey, buddy.


Your mom and I
would like to talk to you.

Think you could pause that game?

- Not if I'm in trouble.
- You're not in trouble.

We just heard you got in a fight
at school today.

A kid grabbed my cape.
He wouldn't let go of it.

He said it was stupid.

It sounds like that kid is stupid.

A man should know
never to grab another man's cape.

Nathan, your cape, kiddo,
is not stupid, okay?

Hey, when I was younger,
I had a poncho...

...that everybody else said was ugly,
but I really liked it... I kept wearing it. So should you.

If you like your cape,
you should wear it when you want...

...and ignore
what everybody else says.

But what if he keeps picking on me?

Oh, well, I can teach you
how to deal with bullies.

And what your father means by that
is if somebody's picking on you... should just walk away.
Right, honey?

- Yes. Yes, she's right.
- But I wanna be tough like Daddy.

Hey, if you can learn to walk away,
you'll be tougher than I ever was.



- It's not funny.
- I'm so sorry.

I'm only laughing
because of how angry you got.

I mean,
I've never heard anyone yell at it before.


Oh, honey, it is not a big deal. Doesn't it
happen to every guy at some point?

And it wouldn't have happened at all
if we weren't in my mom's bed.

- This is your fault.
- Well, you have never complained before.

I'm talking about your obsession
with this stupid magazine.

Oh, my God.
The magazine has been dead on.

It has predicted
pretty much everything.

I just wish
it would have warned me about this.


- Okay. All right. Okay.
- What are you doing?

It seems I've made a huge mistake.
I'm calling Lindsey.

Fine. If you think that'll help.


- Hey, have I been in tonight?
- Is that a trick question?

- Sam. Have you seen her?
- Not since last night.

- Why? She run out on you again?
- No.

She's actually waiting in the car.
I just needed an excuse to see you.

Sorry I asked.

You know, you're a jerk.
I told you I wanted to be a mom...

...and you ran away so fast, you left
an Owen-shaped hole in my front door.

And I never heard from you again.
Not so much as a phone call.

If you hadn't caught Brooke Davis Jr.
With my ID, I still wouldn't have.

You're right.
And you didn't deserve that.

- And I'm sorry.
- Whatever. You're still a jerk.

- What's going on?
- "When moving in, be ready...

...for him to unpack this little secret.
He wants his own space."


It's in the magazine, it must be true.

So you stay on your side of the line,
and you get my mom's bed.

And I'll get the TV and the kitchen. Huh?

What is this, The Brady Bunch?

If you cross this line,
you'll be admitting...

...that this article is stupid
and that I'm right about everything.

- Fine, looks like I get the bathroom.
- Fine.

I'm hungry. I think I'll go make myself
some French toast.

Oh, it is so on.

GIRL: Hilary, hurry.
BO Y: You're going to be late.

Hurry up.

Sweetie, is that the boy
that was picking on you?

No. I thought my shoe was untied.
Bye, Mama.

Bye, sweetie.

Excuse me, can I talk to you
for a second?

- I'm Haley Scott. I'm Jamie's mom.
- Uh-huh.

Um... Jamie came home upset
the other day.

- I guess your son was teasing him.
- Well, you know how boys are.

Don't you think
we should do something about it?

No, I think it's best if we
let the boys work it out for themselves.

So much better than tattling,
don't you think?

Uh... He's not tattling. He's 5 years old.
And he just wants to be left alone.

Is he the one with the cape? Oh. Wow.

Five is a little old for a cape,
don't you think?

Maybe you should do him a favor.
Take it away from him...

...and then he won't get teased
anymore. About the cape anyway.

- What is that supposed to mean?
- He's probably just a late bloomer.

- I'm sure he'll make friends someday.
- Listen, if your little brat doesn't stop...

...picking on my son,
not only will Jamie kick his ass...

...l'll be kicking yours
right alongside. Got that, bitch?

I'd like to see you try, little girl.


- What happened to walking away?
HALEY: I know.

But you didn't see her.
She was such a bitch.

- Sounds like you made that pretty clear.
- Jamie's been through so much lately.

The last thing he needs
is some bully picking on him.

He'll be fine. He's a tough kid.
But you know what? I'll take care of it.

In the meantime, try not to kill anybody.
Okay, slugger?

What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna call his mom a bitch
and then push her.

Oh, that's right, you already did that
didn't you?

I don't know what I'm gonna do. But I'll
take care of it. I'll think of something.

- I'm sorry.
- Oh. Are you kidding me?

My girl is a badass. That's hot.

Damn, he's good.

- Look what I found on my side.
- Oh. No, no, no.

You cross, you lose.




"Fergie. I love you very much
and miss you every time we're apart.

I need to see you. Soon."

Don't you dare.





- What's up?
- Lucas loves him some Fergalicious.


Hi, Brooke. It's nice to see you too.

Sorry. I was hoping you might be Sam.
But all she knows how to do is leave.

- Is it that bad?
- She likes me as much as I like my mom.

Well, we both know
there's some parents...'re better off without. But you're
not one of them. She'll realize that.

Unfortunately, she hasn't stuck around
long enough to figure that out.

Thank you for coming to check on me.

Well, actually, I need a favor.

Um... It's last minute, it's a lot of work,
and I need it in two hours.

Ha-ha. As tempting as that sounds...

...l'm still orphan-deep in the last favor
I did for the Scott family.

It's for Jamie.

What do you need?


- It's my new hero.
- Hey.

I've been here three years.
I've never gotten a raise.

You tell them to shove their job... get a better position,
a new office and a hot intern.

Well, I don't know if...
Hot intern?

- Gigi?
- Mouth.

- Wait, you guys know each other?
- We were high school lovers.


It's a bird. It's a plane.
It's Superbaby.


Aw. Are you sad? Are you gonna
go fly home to your mommy?

No, I'm gonna walk away.

Who doesn't think
that capes are cool?

Chuckie. He did.

Well, if I didn't have a cape,
I couldn't do this.

- Cool.
- Cool.

Oh, by the way, that box right there
is full of capes if anybody wants one.


Oh, hi.

- You didn't come home last night.
- It's not my home.

Besides, you said I could come and go
as I please. So I left.

That is not what I meant.
I was worried about you.

Sam, I can't help you
if you're not willing to be helped.

Apparently you'd rather eat here
than in my kitchen...

...and you wanna sleep in a car
instead of my guest room.

I don't know what to do for you.

I just don't think this is gonna work.

It's okay.
I'm used to people giving up on me.

It happens all the time.

See that waitress over there?

That's my mom.

One day I'm gonna tell her who I am
and the big mistake she made.

Like I said,
I'm used to people giving up on me.

- Thanks anyway.
- Sam.

So my girlfriend and I moved to Omaha.
But then my girlfriend moved back... I decided to move back
to be with her.

You're so much more muscular
than in high school.

Yeah, my girlfriend is really
into being healthy, so I am too.

For my girlfriend.

What have you been up to?

Going to college, taking journalism
classes, having lots of sex.

Oh, and my mom
had her appendix out last week.

- That's wow.
- It's so good to see you again.

It's weird because I was
thinking about you just the other day.

- What about?
- I was walking to class.

And all of a sudden I thought,
"I should have had sex with Mouth."

- Isn't that weird?
- Yeah. That is weird.

- Did I mention that I have a girlfriend?
- Cool. I do too sometimes.


So Nathan told me about the capes.
You are officially...

...the world's greatest godmother,
and you've totally made Jamie's year.

- Thank you so much, Brooke.
- At least I made one kid happy today.

What happened?

I was gonna talk to Sam last night
like you said, and she never showed.

And I just told her
I can't help her anymore.

I'm sorry, Haley.

No. No.
I should not have forced her on you.

I just thought if anyone could handle her,
you could...

...because you were a lot like her
and got past it.

I thought she could too,
if somebody gave her a chance.

Well, I guess I'm not strong enough.

you're the strongest person I know.

You just gave up
a multi-million dollar corporation...

...and you seem fine about it.
I wish I had your strength.

My strength? Haley, you gave up
your singing career to be with Nathan...

...who was at least as screwed up as me
or Sam when you got ahold of him.

And now he's the best guy I know.

Look, it was scary. I was scared
to death to give up the company.

But it wasn't fun anymore.

And now I get to do
what I fell in love with.

Design clothes on my terms.

Yeah. That sounds familiar.

I met a girl who sings on the street
every day for fun.

It's amazing. She seems so happy.

Music used to be like that for me,
and it's just not anymore, you know.

Well, then you need
to make it fun again.

Find what you loved about it
and start there.

You're too strong not to.

- I will think about it.
- Okay.

You're definitely done with Sam?

- I'll think about it.
- Good.

- Oh, that's just not fair.
- What are you talking about?

Oh, you know, it's dark in my room
so I was just gonna crash early.

All by myself.

Well, it's nice and bright in my room.

Thought I'd do
a little reading before bed.

Hmm. Maybe you should reread your book
and think about the comet...

...and how close it is but you can't
touch it because you're stubborn.

Maybe I will. I love my book.

Good. Good. I love sleeping naked.

Damn, she's good.

And then Daddy jumped 8 feet
and dunked the ball.

I was the most popular kid in school.

I even got six girls' digits
like Uncle Skills taught me.

Really? Uncle Skills? I'll be
having a conversation with Uncle Skills.

Hey, get used to being popular.
You're a Scott boy.

Mama, why don't you
wear your poncho anymore?

I think one day I just outgrew it.
Good night, buddy. Mwah.

Good night.

I haven't told you how proud of you I am
for walking away today.

I didn't want to, but you said
it would make me tough.

It does. It took me a long time
to learn that lesson.

Those kids teased you about your cape,
and you wore it anyway.

They wanted to fight you,
and you just walked away.

See, there's leaders, and there's
followers, and you are a leader.

I wouldn't have fought him,
but he said Quentin was stupid...

...and Quentin was not stupid.
Quentin was my friend.

That's right, he was your friend. Heh.

And he would be proud of you too.

Good night, buddy.

Trust me, back seats
are not meant for sleeping.

What are you doing here?


I thought I'd crash
at your place tonight.

I know what it feels like to
have parents who give up on you.

I had one who ignored me
and one who resented me.

And sometimes I feel like I'd be
better off if I never had parents at all.

No, you wouldn't.

Sam, I don't want to make
the same mistakes our parents made.

I want you to move in with me...

...on an official foster-home basis,
if you want to.

What's the catch?

There's no catch. There are rules.

Breakfast is at 7:00 a.m. Sharp.

And no more stealing, my stuff
or anyone else's, but mostly mine.



That is the last thing.

I promise.

What you did for Jamie was amazing.

I didn't do that for Jamie.

I did that for Chuck's mom,
I was afraid you were gonna kill her.


Well, you saved the day for everyone,
like a big old superhero.

- You don't need a sidekick, do you?
- Sidekick?

No. No, I think tomorrow I'll go back
to being mild-mannered SlamBall player...

...Nathan Scott.
- I wouldn't call you mild-mannered.


And what about you?
What are you doing tomorrow?

I think I'm in the mood
to do some singing.

It's about time.




I tell you to stay, you disappear,
to get lost, and you're at my doorstep.

Apparently you have everything
backwards, so come on in.

- Wait, wait. Can we talk?
- Sure. How have you been?

There, we talked. If you don't mind,
it's late and I have a girl sleeping inside.

I just want a chance
to explain myself.

Fine. Explain.

Look, I got freaked out
when you mentioned the baby.

I had a horrible childhood, then
I get addicted to heroin really early on.

Now, I avoid anything more
responsible than making drinks.

The thought of me being a father
was just too much.

I never asked you to be the father.

I know. But if you ever did...

...I know I wouldn't be any good at it.

So I disappeared.

And you have every right
to be mad at me.

And I'm sorry.


Have you ever considered that going
through all those awful experiences... exactly what would
make you a good father someday?

I've seen you be responsible
with Rachel and caring with Jamie.

You even brought Sam home,
and she's a total stranger to you.

Well, truth be told, I just brought
her home because I wanted to see you.


Okay, well, if she's
at the bar tonight...

...then bring her home
and you will see me again.

Then I hope she's in
the drinking mood.

But if not, then I hope
the real Brooke Davis will stop by.

I promise you...

...I won't go anywhere this time.

I'll think about it.


You know, I read somewhere that
you should never go to bed angry.

Now, it wasn't B. Davis magazine,
so I'm not sure it's very valid.

I'm not angry.

In fact, I've actually had fun
these last few days playing around...

...especially since I've been winning.

Well, before you get too excited...

...may I remind you that your moving
boxes were on my side of the line.

- What'd you do?
- I just unpacked some of your stuff...

...and found a really great picture
to replace the one of Lindsey.

Oh, Luke, that is sweet.

Of course you went through my art
again without asking permission.

My side, my art, babe.

I'm starting to like your side better.

I was about to say the same thing.

So let's be on the same side again.

- I really have to go to the bathroom.
- Oh, my God, I'm starving.

Mm. Somebody smells good. Hot date?

No. Why? It's just work.

Touchy, touchy.
I'm just saying you smell good.

I'd say you look good too,
but I don't wanna get hit.

Well, go ahead. Risk it.

How was your first day back?
Everyone happy to see you?

- Some of them.
- Well, I'm thrilled to have you back.

Do you have your new
Tree Hill catch phrase yet?

- I don't think I'm gonna need one.
- Sure you will. How about:

- Mouthing off from the Hill?
- No.

- Lf a tree falls, Mouth will make a sound?
- Please stop.

- Or what about...?
- How's this? I'm Marvin McFadden...

...and I am so glad
I'm back here with you.

I love it.

- Bye, Grandpa.
- See you, buddy.


- Bye, honey.
DAN: Miss Scolnik.

Dan Scott, Jamie's grandfather.

That's a cute kid.

Well, kid anyway.

I hear he and Jamie got into a little
scuffle. I sure hope they work it out.

You know what?
I think they already have.

I'd love to join you
for your morning drink...

...but I'm late for a meeting
with my parole officer.


Hey. Tell me you're on the way to
the studio to make your new record.

Actually, I was thinking
about singing for fun today.

- What do you think, you up for a duet?
- Are you kidding? I would be honored.

- Great. What do you wanna play?
- How about this one?



Sam, breakfast!



You said breakfast at 7:00. It's 7:00.

It's a start.


Well, ahh, your stuff is unpacked...

...the tape is gone, and the house
is officially both of ours.

Perfect timing.

- I made waffles.
- I love waffles.

I do too. Plus, I got the recipe
from B. Davis magazine... you know it'll be good.
- Well, you better enjoy them...

...because I canceled your subscription.
- What?



Holy cow. I forgot there was
a world outside the house.

Hey, Luke. I got your text.


Hey, Jamie. Did your dad
bring you to school? He's the coolest.

- Yeah. Scotts rule.
- Yeah. Do you wanna play kickball?

- You can be on my team.
- Whoa, Chuck, slow your roll.

- Maybe another time.
- Why aren't you wearing your cape?

Well, some people lead,
and some people follow.