One Day at a Time (1975–1984): Season 4, Episode 10 - Jealousy: Part 2 - full transcript

The battle for the band leader Doug continues as Barbara tries to win him back from Julie.

♪ This is it ♪ This is it

♪ This is life, the one you get

♪ So go and have
a ball ♪ This is it

♪ This is it

♪ Straight ahead
and rest assured

♪ You can't be sure at all

♪ So while you're
here enjoy the view

♪ Keep on doing what you do

♪ So hold on tight
we'll muddle through

♪ One day at a
time, one day at a time

♪ So up on your
feet ♪ Up on your feet



♪ Somewhere
there's music playing

♪ Don't you worry none

♪ We'll just take
it like it comes

♪ One day at a
time, one day at a time

♪ One day at a time

♪ One day at a
time, one day at a time

♪ One day at a
time, one day at a time

- [Narrator] Here are some
scenes from last week's show.

- Well, what'd ya think?

- Oh wonderful,
terrific, beautiful.

- Well, I think things
are gonna be pleasant

around here for a while.

Twinkle Brains got a crush.

(chuckles)



- You know that's the first boy

that she's been interested
in since Cliff Randall.

- I sang it's some
dances in high schools.

- Okay, you wanna try out?

I gotta find a singer.

We go on Tuesday night.

- At the Sundowner's Club.

You'll love it, come on.

- Do I get my own dressing room?

I was with Doug, we had a date.

- Julie, how could you...
- Mom!

Please, don't say it.

I've already said
it all to myself.

- Surprise.

- [Narrator] And now for
the conclusion of Jealousy.

- Whoo.

Hello!

Anybody home?

Oh.

A hot bath and I'll be terrific.

- Mom! (screaming)

- Barbara, hi.

- Here, Happy Birthday.

- Ugh, Barbara!

Barbara, what's going on?

- [Barbara] Jezebel is alive
and living in my bedroom.

- Barbara, what happened?

- What happened?
- Yeah.

- What happened?

I'll tell you what happened.

That's what happened.

- Well I'm glad
that's cleared up.

Barbara, Barbara, wait a minute.

(grunting)

(screaming)

- And here, in we go.

Oh, Ms. Romano, sorry, I
didn't mean to interrupt a...

(mumbles)

- What's the bed for?

- What's the bed for?

You've been alone
too long, Ms. Romano.

- The bed is for Julie,
she's moving out of my room.

- Oh yeah, when
did she decide that?

- She didn't, I did.

When I saw her kissing Doug.

- Ah.

Uh look... - Julie kissing Doug?

I thought you and Doug?

- Yeah, I thought so too.

- Oh now look, don't
be too hard on Julie,

I mean them musicians,
they're all weird.

I used to go out with this
woman, she was a xylophonist.

I got her mad one night, she
took out one of her mallets

and started to play Blue
Moon on my ribs, you know?

♪ Blue moon I'm thinking you...

- Could you please
put the bed in there?

- Yeah, yeah I'll
put the bed in there.

- No, Schneider, wait a minute.

Put the bed in the basement.
- The basement...

- Right, that's
the place for Julie.

- Would you like to tell
me exactly what happened?

- I came in to surprise
Doug for his birthday

and there she was in his arms.

And I was standing
there like Mary Poppins

with this dumb terrarium.

- Oh Sweetheart, I
knew this thing with Julie

was gonna hurt you,

but you've known Doug
such a short time, I've...

- You knew about Julie
and you didn't tell me?

- Uh, well, yes...
- Whoa, wow, wow, wow.

Ms. Romano, I gotta tell ya,

on a scale of one
to 10, that stinks.

- Schneider, would
you mind terribly...

- Look, don't be too
hard on your mom,

you know what I mean.

Barbara, see the thing
is in an Italian family,

you gotta try and get the
oldest daughter married first.

- Schneider, ciao.

- No, I'm on a diet.

(mumbling)

- Schneider!
- Yeah?

- Ciao.

- Oh, ciao, ciao,
you mean arrivederci.

- Oh, all right, arrivederci.

- Yeah, chow, yes.

(screaming)

I'm not touching ya.

I didn't touch ya.

My fingers never touched ya.

They never...
- Okay, it's okay.

- Barbara, can
we talk about this?

- How are you gonna talk
with a fist in your mouth?

- Come on, Barbara, I
wanna tell you about it.

- Oh sure, don't you
think it's a little bit late?

I mean why tell me?

You already told mom.

- You told her I told you?

Mom, you broke my confidence.

- Oh, well, Julie,
I didn't mean to...

- Oh wow.

- Schneider.

- How did you like Doug's kiss?

Did I have him warmed
up enough for you?

- Would you listen, Barbara?

I feel terrible about this.

- Oh Julie, I'm sorry.

I mean how could I be so cruel

hurting my sweet,
loving sister's feelings.

How insensitive of me.

No wonder you
wanted to sing with him.

- Hey, that was your idea.

I didn't even know him.

- Oh yeah, well, you didn't
know Bobby Benton either.

- Who's Bobby Benton?

- Little Bobby Benton?

In Logan's Port?

What about him?

- Don't pretend
you don't remember.

The minute I took my nap
you had him in the garage

playing show and tell.

(laughing)

- Why those were the days.

I remember once in my
grandfather's chicken coop

me and little Suzy Blake, we
were holding the chickens up

to see which were
the boys and the girls.

Sometimes you hold
them up to the light

you know you can tell...

- Schneider, Schneider,
would you mind?

I've got enough problems
without your help.

- Yeah, okay.

Okay, Julia.

But I would like to say
one thing before I leave.

- Do you have to?

- All too often in this life
I have been the object

over whom women have
fought and believe me,

it's not a pretty sight.

The screaming, the
scratching, the pulling out of hair.

Sad to say but because
of me today out there

walking around there's
four or five bald women.

So girls, don't ever forget
and please always remember

there ain't nothing quite
as sensitive or as deep

as the love of a
sister for a sister.

- Thanks, Schneider.

- Or a brother.

Or a brother for a sister.

Or a brother for a brother.
- Brother for a brother.

- Or even a half
brother for a...

(screaming)

I'm gonna call my mother.

- Look, Barbara, I'm
very sorry that I hurt you.

I didn't plan it.

I mean I felt so guilty when
Doug took me out to dinner

that I just... - Dinner?

You had a date?

- Mom, I thought you told her.

- Ma, you knew about that too?

- [Schneider] Oh wow.

- I resign, I do not
want to be a mother.

Yes, Barbara, Julie
told me, but the thing...

- Mom, mom, it's okay.

Barbara, mom
asked me to tell you

and I tried to but I couldn't.

- I'll bet you couldn't.

- Mom, would you tell her?

- No, I'm not gonna tell her.

You're gonna have to work
this out between the two of ya.

- Work what out?

I'm right and she's wrong.

- Come on, Barbara.

Now why don't we just sit
down and talk about this, okay?

When you look at it,
Doug and I are both older

and we have a lot in common.

- Julie, I'm not the child
you happen to think I am.

- I know that, Barbara, but...

Who's sleeping over?

- You.

- What?

- Well you're certainly not
gonna sleep in my room.

- Oh, oh that's really
adult of you, Barbara.

You think you've grown up,
trying to take my room away.

- Oh right, right.

It is a little bit more adult
to take away a boyfriend.

- Barbara, be realistic, okay?

Now all you had for
Doug was a crush.

You've only known him two weeks.

- Seems to me you
found true love in two days.

- Just be sensible, would you?

I mean look at all this stuff.

Is this the adult way
to solve this thing?

Oh, and you think you're
really gonna hurt me

by throwing my old teddy
bear in the trash can?

- Wait till I tell Doug
you still sleep with it.

- How'd you like a
kick in the back door

of your Dr. Denton's?

- Okay, hey, time.

Now nothing is getting solved.

Julie I want you to sit down.

Sit down.

Barbara, you too.

I want you to sit down and
discuss this whole thing calmly.

- Mother...
- Sit!

Okay, now I don't
want either one of you

to say a word
until I count to 10.

One.

Two.

Three... - But she... (yells)

- Four.

Five.

Six.

Seven... - Mother... (yells)

- Eight.

Nine.

Nine and 1/2.

Ten, good.

Okay.

Barbara, you first.

What do you have to say?

- I do not wear Dr. Denton's.

Well what should I say?

I'm in the innocent victim.

She is the one that should
feel guilty, if that's possible.

- I do feel guilty, Barbara,
and I tried to tell ya that.

Just let me explain.

- Oh, I don't wanna hear it.

- Barbara...
- I don't wanna hear it.

- I feel like a snake.

- I'm listening.

- I'm a low despicable person.

- Go on.

- Barbara.

- She hasn't even gotten
to the ones I'm thinking of.

- Barbara, just listen to me.

I didn't try and take
Doug away from you.

We just started working
together and we both like music.

Actually we talked
about you a lot.

Had a few laughs.

Not in that order.

- Barbara look, I
know you're hurt.

You're very hurt, but...
- Hurt, me?

Oh no, no, no.

Why should I be hurt?

I mean my dear sister
just stole my boyfriend

and it was such a
small thing in her life

that she forgot to mention it.

- Barbara, would
you listen to me?

I tried to tell you.

- I'm sorry, I guess your
postcard got lost in the mail.

- I went down there today
to tell Doug we were through.

- (scoffs) Yeah, I saw
your goodbye kiss.

- All right, all right.

Just forget it.

I'm sorry your ego
is bent, Barbara.

But why don't you grow up?

You lose.

Doug wants me, do
you get the message.

- Oh yeah.

I get the message.

All little Barbara gave
him for his birthday

was a terrarium.

Obviously her older,
more experienced sister

has something more to offer.

- Barbara!
- Stop it, stop it!

This is getting pretty rough.

- You're right, Julie.

Maybe it is about
time I grew up.

I mean after all, anybody
can play your game.

Even me.

- Barbara.

- Barbara!
- Wait!

- Barbara!
- Barbara, come back!

Barbara!

- Is Doug there?

- It's ringing.

- Why did you let her go?

- Me?

- Yeah, why didn't you stop her?

Is Doug there?

- It's ringing. (sighs)

Mom, would you please calm down?

Barbara just made this
whole big scene to hurt me.

Nothing's gonna happen.

I trust her.

- Like she trusted you?

- All right, I trust Doug.

- I don't.

Is he at the club or isn't he?

- Oh, somebody's answering.

- Let me have the phone.

Hello, I'm looking
for Barbara Cooper

when she comes in would ya...

I'm talking to a machine.

Terrific, what am I
supposed to say?

This is Ms. Romano,
would you please check

if my daughter comes in to see

if she's seducing
your band leader?

- Mom.

- Hello, hello!

Erase that, erase that!

April Fool joke!

(laughs)

You better call
Doug at his place.

- Mom, it's okay.

- It's okay?

It's okay that my youngest
daughter went down there

to throw herself at some
hyped up, spaced out,

groupie grabbing
punk rock musician?

- It's country rock, mom.

Besides, Doug
isn't that kind of guy.

- Okay.

- Mom, there never
really was anything at all

between Doug and Barbara.

She just thought there was.

I mean she's gonna
go down there...

- And be terribly hurt.

- Yeah.

Maybe I'd better go find her.

- Julie, wait a minute.

If there really was nothing
between Doug and Barbara,

there's only one person
she's gonna believe

and it's not gonna be you.

(sighs) And it's
not gonna be me.

You are right about
Doug, aren't you?

- Of course I am.

- You're sure?

- I'm positive.
- Good.

- She is awfully pretty though.

(playing piano)

(flicks cymbal)

- Hey there, kid.

- Don't stop playing.

- Oh no, I was
just fooling around.

- Again?

- Hey look, look about
Julie, you know it just sorta...

- Happened.

- Yeah, right.

Right, but...
- You didn't plan it that way.

- No.

No, but see we just...

- You tried to stop
but you couldn't do it.

Come on, what do you think I am?

Some emotional little girl?

Think I'd go running home crying

just because I saw
you kissing Julie?

I mean, I don't blame you.

She's very tall
and thin and pretty.

And I'm sure she's over her
very bad case of mono by now.

- Mono, huh?

- (laughs) It would
serve you right.

- I gotta tell you something.

I was really worried

about how you were
gonna take this, kid.

- Kid?

Come on, Doug are
you sure about that?

Look, you like Julie
and you like me.

Why make up your mind
before all the evidence is in?

- Hey.

Look, Barb.

Look, we never
had a thing, okay?

I mean you're a nice kid,

but we're just not right
for each other that's all.

Why don't we
leave it at that, huh?

(slams piano)

- Thanks, Doug.

No, no, no, I'm okay.

Buh-bye.

- Yeah, so?

- Doug says that Barbara
left the club an hour ago.

- An hour?

Oh, Schneider.

- Hi there, Ms. Romano.

Guess you're wondering
why I haven't been around

the last couple of hours.

- No, no, not really.

- It's just that I'm worried
about the kids, you know?

Been out walking
the streets, you know?

At one point I was
so deep in thought

I accidentally bumped
into a little old lady.

Well the first thing I
know she blows a whistle.

She stomps on my...
Stomps on my instep.

Then she grabs
for a can of Mace.

Luckily I flagged a cop and he
gave her one across the ankle

and I got away.

But I was just wondering,
you know, if anything's settled.

- Not exactly.

- I must have walked this
city from one end to the other.

I'm, I'm really exhausted.

Can I sit down?

- Hey, you better get dressed.

You gotta perform tonight.

- Oh, not tonight.

I'm calling off my dating.

- Mom, how am I gonna
sing at a time like this?

- You said you'd do it, do it.

Come on.

- Okay.

(sighs)

- Ms. Romano, you're
gonna have to do something.

I mean those girls,
they could really wind up

hating each other.

- There's nothing I
can do, Schneider.

They're gonna have to
work it out themselves.

- Well, I don't know,
maybe you're right.

Mothers are too
emotionally involved

to get into these
things, you know.

You want me to step in?

- No.

- It's like, you know, like
two of my own daughters,

you know, what they need
is a strong male influence

to go to for advice
and guidance.

- Schneider, look...
- You know what I would do?

I would do the same
thing that my father did

to me and my brother
when we had fights.

- What was that?

- He would lock us in our room

and he wouldn't let us
come out until we made up.

I mean one time he
locked us in our room

for three straight days.

But when we came
out we were friends.

A little gamey, but friends.

- Schneider, I really
appreciate your advice,

but I really can't...

Sweetheart.

Are you okay?

- Listen, Barbara, I
just want you to know

that if you need a
shoulder to put your head on

it's right here.

Look at that.

You see how nice things turn
out when you have a man around?

You can handle it
from here, Ms. Romano.

- Mm.

It was awful.

I mean I really feel stupid.

- Come on, baby,
let's sit down and talk.

- No, no, no, I don't
wanna sit down.

- Let's stand up and talk.

- No, I don't wanna stand up.

I wanna hit somebody.

Is Julie home?

You know what happened?

- Mm hmm.

Doug turned you down?

- How did you know?

- We were worried when
you didn't come home.

We called Doug.

- Oh great.

Why don't we just take
out an ad in the paper?

- Boy I hate a guy who
won't kiss and then tell.

- You're a real big help.

I mean you make fun of
me, Julie steals my boyfriend

and then he tells me he
never was my boyfriend.

- Was there anybody
else you wanna blame?

Look, Sweetheart, you're
the one who went down there

and took the big risk just
because your ego was hurt.

- Mom, don't you care?

I made a fool out of myself.

- Darling, Doug likes Julie
differently than he likes you.

That's all.

You lost him.

If you wanna face
facts, you never had him.

- But if Julie hadn't...
- Barbara!

You never had him.

- All he had to do was...
- You lost him.

- All right, all
right, I lost him.

- Right, you lost him.

So what?

- What do you mean so what?

- I'm asking you so what?

Tell me so what?

- So...

So...

- So, you're never gonna
have another boyfriend.

- That's dumb.

- Mm hmm.

So, you're gonna become a nun.

So, you're gonna
jump off the roof.

So, you're gonna go to the
jungle and live with the apes.

- Now you're really
being ridiculous.

- Well, believe
it or not Ripley,

the sun is gonna come
up tomorrow just the way

it did today.

- Maybe.

- You'll go to school, you'll
have lunch with your friends,

you'll get mad when you
see Cliff talking to Trish.

And by this weekend
you'll have, I don't know,

maybe three guys
asking ya for dates.

And a month from now
you'll be a month older.

I can almost guarantee it.

- I think I already
am a month older.

Cliff with Trish?

(laughs)

- I just pulled that
out I mean it's...

- You just ruined another
perfectly good mad.

- I know, a
terrible thing to do.

- Mom, would you
do me a favor and...

Hi, Barbara.

- So what?

- Look, sis...
- Don't worry.

I lost him.

You got him.

I'm not gonna go
live with the apes.

- Did I miss something?

- Yes.

Go ahead, go sing
with what's his face.

- Barbara, you mean
you're gonna come down

and hear me sing?

Oh, I want ya there.

- Oh.

I don't think I can.

- Barbara, if you weren't
there I couldn't sing.

- Well just go and sing, okay?

Sing.

- No way, come on.

You're my only sister and you
know that means more to me

than my first chance to sing.

More than Doug.

- Okay.

- Okay what?

- Okay don't sing.

- Don't sing?

After all the tender love
I've just expressed for you?

- Oh yeah, that wasn't love.

- Okay kid, you gonna
come down and hear me sing

or aren't you?

- All right, all right, I'll
come here you sing!

Gosh, you always get your way!

- You see, ma?

You just gotta know
how to handle her.

(country pop music)

♪ Ain't got no
trouble in my life

♪ No foolish dreams
to make me cry

♪ I'm never
frightened or worried

♪ I know I'll always
get by ♪ I heat up

♪ I cool down

♪ If something gets
in my way I go 'round it

♪ Don't let life get me down

♪ Gonna take it
the way that I found it

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ They say that life
is a circle ♪ Circle

♪ That ain't the
way that I found it

♪ Gonna move in a straight line

♪ Straight line

♪ Keeping my feet
firmly on the ground

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music
in me ♪ I feel funky

♪ I feel good

♪ Gonna tell ya I'm
in the neighborhood

♪ Gonna fly like
a bird on a wing

♪ Hold onto your hat, honey

♪ Sing, sing, sing,
sing ♪ I heat up

♪ Cool down ♪ Cool down

♪ I've got birds in
my head so I say that

♪ Don't let life get me down

♪ Don't let it get me down

♪ Catch ahold of my
blues and just play them

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in
me ♪ I got the music

♪ Pretty music ♪ I
got the music in me

♪ Yeah

(applause)

Thank you.

- One, two.

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in me

♪ I got the music in
me ♪ We feel funky

♪ We feel good

♪ And I tell ya I'm
in the neighborhood

- [Announcer] One Day at a
Time was recorded live on tape

before a studio audience.