Oddities (2010–…): Season 5, Episode 8 - New Oddleans - full transcript

WELCOME TO THE WEIRD WORLD
OF "ODDITIES."

I HAVE SOMETHING OUTSIDE.
IT'S ABSOLUTELY HUGE.

YOU GUYS GOT THAT?
CHECK IT OUT.

I'M LOOKING FOR ODDS AND ENDS
FOR A KINETIC SCULPTOR.

I HAVE MEDICAL DEVICES.

THESE WERE MEANT
FOR CASTRATION.

I ACTUALLY MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING
THAT YOU'RE INTERESTED IN.
IT'S LIKE A KETTLE.

YEAH, IT'S DEFINITELY NOT
A NORMAL TEA KETTLE.

THIS WAS USED
TO TREAT THIS.

THIS HAS BEEN USED
AS AN EXECUTION SWORD.

OH, MY GOODNESS!



OBSCURA AIN'T YOUR
GRANDMOTHER'S ANTIQUE SHOP.

WHOA!

WELL, UNLESS YOUR GRANDMA'S
A BIT OF A KOOK.

IS THAT A STRAITJACKET?

I'M MIKE.

AND I'M EVAN.

WE'VE SPENT OUR ENTIRE LIVES... COLLECTING
AND DEALING... HUNTING AND PICKING...

TO GET THIS BUSINESS...
DOWN TO A SCIENCE.

THIS IS "ODDITIES."

HELLO.
HI.

LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE
ANY QUESTIONS OR ANYTHING.

YEAH, I ACTUALLY MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING
THAT YOU'RE INTERESTED IN.

OKAY. SOMETHING THAT
YOU'RE LOOKING TO SELL?

YEAH,
IT'S LIKE A KETTLE.



A KETTLE?

WELL, YEAH, LIKE... WE DON'T
USUALLY BUY TEA KETTLES,

UNLESS IT'S
INCREDIBLY INTERESTING.

NO, IT'S TOTALLY DIFFERENT FROM
YOUR NORMAL, LIKE, NORMAL TEAPOT.

SO I'VE HAD THIS IN MY KITCHEN,
AND IT'S NOT A NORMAL KETTLE.

IT'S GOT BITS AND BOBS COMING OUT OF
IT, AND THEN A LONG... SPOUT, I GUESS.

WHATEVER IT IS,
IT'S A CULINARY DELIGHT.

LET'S HAVE A LOOK AT IT.

OKAY.
RIGHT?

YEAH, IT'S DEFINITELY NOT A
NORMAL TEA KETTLE, BY ANY MEANS.

CAN I CHECK IT OUT?
SURE, YEAH.

WOW.

IT'S A TEAPOT OF SORTS, OR IF
YOU WANT TO CALL IT A KETTLE.

I'VE SEEN THESE BEFORE.

SO ACTUALLY, THIS HAD MORE
OR LESS A SPECIFIC PURPOSE.

REALLY?

I HAVE A SPECIMEN HERE
THAT I CAN ACTUALLY SHOW YOU.

IT MIGHT MAKE MORE SENSE,
THOUGH.

IF YOU WANT TO JUST HOLD THAT
FOR A SEC.

THAT DEVICE
WOULD BE USED FOR THIS.

WHAT... THAT'S SICK.
WHAT IS THAT?

THAT... THAT IS, UM,
HORRIBLE.

YEAH.
WHAT?

WHAT IS IT?

OKAY, SO, THIS IS...

A HEMORRHOID.

WHAT?!
YEAH.

THIS IS A HEMORRHOID.

AND MORE SPECIFICALLY, THIS IS A SECTION
OF ANUS WITH A GIANT HEMORRHOID ON IT.

REALLY?
YEAH, IT'S PRETTY DISGUSTING.

THIS DEVICE WAS BASICALLY USED
TO ADMINISTER,

YOU KNOW, DIFFERENT TYPES OF MEDICINE
TO YOUR ANUS TO CURE HEMORRHOIDS.

AAH!

THIS? UGH!
YEAH.

BUT THIS IS
A QUACK MEDICAL DEVICE.

IT DIDN'T ACTUALLY WORK.

THE MEDICINE WOULD BE PUT IN HERE, AND
THE NOZZLE WOULD GO IN YOUR BACKSIDE.

AND IT'S A HARD-TO-REACH PLACE,
YOU KNOW?

SO YOU WOULD HAVE YOUR LOVED ONE OR A
DOCTOR JUST KIND OF GO UP IN THERE.

YOU'D HAVE TO
REALLY LOVE THEM.

AND IT WOULD BE PUMPING
IN THE MEDICINE.

AND HOPEFULLY IT WOULD GET
BETTER OVER A PERIOD OF TIME.

I CAN'T BELIEVE
I HAD THAT IN MY KITCHEN.

I KNOW, RIGHT?

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT
YOU WANTED TO GET FOR THIS?

PROBABLY SOMETHING LIKE,
I DON'T KNOW, $300 OR SOMETHING?

$300?

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT, UM...
I DON'T KNOW, $250?

THAT SOUND GOOD?
THAT SOUNDS GOOD. YEAH.

GOT A DEAL, THEN.
COOL. THANK YOU.

THANKS.

I GOT A CALL FROM
ONE OF OUR LONGTIME CUSTOMERS

WHO'S LOOKING FOR SOMETHING
VERY SPECIFIC.

HE COLLECTS JUST ABOUT ANYTHING,
AND HE USES IT FOR HIS SCULPTURES.

I'M CURIOUS TO SEE HIS STUDIOS,

AND I'M INTERESTED TO SEE
EXACTLY WHAT HE'S LOOKING FOR.

HELLO? OH, HI.
STEVE!

EVAN, THANKS FOR COMING.
THIS IS MY EMPIRE OF OBJECTS.

GOODNESS!

WOW! CAN'T EVEN
TAKE IT ALL IN.

SOMETIMES I CAN'T,
EITHER.

IT'S KIND OF MY NEMESIS,
ACTUALLY.

I'M AN ARTIST.
I BUILD MECHANICAL SCULPTURE.

I'VE ALWAYS BEEN INTERESTED
IN SEA CREATURES AND FISH.

I LIKE TO USE ANYTHING FROM DUMPSTERS
AND THRIFT SHOPS AND PLACES LIKE...

ANYTHING.

MY WORK NORMALLY IS INTERACTIVE,
WHERE YOU PUSH A BUTTON LIKE THIS

AND IT TURNS ON AND
SOMETHING UNBELIEVABLE HAPPENS.

THIS PIECE IS CALLED
"GOPHERS GOLFING."

I TURNED THESE PRAIRIE DOGS
INTO GOPHERS THAT GOLF.

IS THAT A BISON IN THERE?

IT'S A MASTODON, AND
HE'S ACTUALLY THE WATER PUMP.

THE MASTODON
IS ATTACHED TO...?

TO HOSES
AND SPRINKLER SYSTEMS.

IT'S GOT
ITS OWN SPRINKLER SYSTEM.

THAT IS... AMAZING.

LET ME SHOW YOU A FEW MORE
THINGS I'VE GOT READY.

I RESCUED A THOUSAND HEELS
FROM A HEEL FACTORY,

TURNED THEM INTO
THIS OSCILLATING SCULPTURE.

WOW, THAT'S FANTASTIC.

PART OF
THE "HEELING" PROCESS.

THIS IS AMAZING.
I LOVE YOUR WORK.

YOU KNOW, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE PRETTY
MUCH ACCUMULATED EVERY INTERESTING THING.

WHAT SPECIFICALLY
ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?

I'VE GOT QUITE A FEW UNUSUAL OBJECTS, BUT
KIND OF LOOKING FOR THAT SOMETHING EXTRA,

SOMETHING MORE UNIQUE... NOT MECHANIC'S
TOOLS, BUT SOMETHING MEDICAL

THAT I CAN POSSIBLY APPLY AS A DETAIL
IN ONE OF THESE INTERACTIVE PIECES.

FAIR ENOUGH.

WE DO GET DENTAL STUFF,
VICTORIAN SURGICAL TOOLS,

THOUGH STUFF LIKE THAT DOES TEND
TO BE SLIGHTLY COSTLY.

WELL,
THE BUDGET IS MODEST.

MAYBE $450, $500.

OKAY.

SOMETHING MEDICAL,
BUT NOT CRAZY HIGH-END.

YEAH.
HIGH-END ISN'T ME.

WELL,
I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS

BECAUSE I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE
WHAT YOU MAKE OUT OF IT.

THANKS FOR COMING.
THANKS FOR HAVING ME OVER.

LET ME SHOW YOU
HOW TO EXIT.

THE THING
IN A JAR THAT LIGHTS UP.

YOU PUT A NEON LIGHT
BELOW IT.

WAS THE DOG FREAKING OUT?

YEAH, I KNOW THAT DOG.

HEY, HOW YOU DOING, MAN?

OH, HI. HOW ARE YOU?
OKAY.

I HAVE SOMETHING OUTSIDE I THINK
YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN.

OKAY.

IT'S ABSOLUTELY HUGE.
OKAY.

CAN WE SEE IT?

SURE, YEAH.
GIVE ME A HAND, THOUGH.

I'VE GOT IT PARKED
AT A METER.

GEEZ. IF YOU WANT TO GRAB THE DOOR...
YEAH, YEAH, SURE.

YOU GUYS GOT THAT?

YEAH.

UH, CAN WE
TAKE A LOOK AT IT?

YEAH. LET'S... CHECK IT OUT.

OH, MAN!
RIGHT?

HOLY... WOW!

I HAVE A LOT OF BITS AND PIECES
AND LEFTOVERS OF MEDICAL DEVICES.

WOW.

YEAH, PULL MY FINGER.

WHOA! WHAT IS THIS?

WE HAVE
A FEW DIFFERENT CONCERNS.

IT MAY BE ILLEGAL TO CONDUCT
YOUR TRANSACTION.

THIS IS "ODDITIES."

I HAVE SOMETHING OUTSIDE
THAT'S ABSOLUTELY HUGE.

OKAY.

YOU GUYS GOT THAT?

YEAH.

CAN WE SEE IT?

YEAH, LET'S... CHECK IT OUT.

LOOK AT THAT.
RIGHT?

THAT IS ONE OF THE LARGEST
SKULLS WE'VE EVER HAD IN HERE.

THAT IS AN ELEPHANT SKULL.

WELL, THIS THING...
IT'S MY FRIEND'S PIECE.

HE BOUGHT A PROPERTY,
AND THIS PIECE WAS IN IT.

YOU KNOW,
I'M JUST THE MESSENGER.

I'M DOING HIM A FAVOR
TO HAUL THIS THING OUT

AND SEE IF I CAN GET
A COUPLE BUCKS FOR IT.

I'M MR. DIRTY WORK, YOU KNOW?
IT'S FUN FOR ME.

THERE IS TWO SPECIES OF
ELEPHANTS THAT WE TYPICALLY SEE.

THERE'S THE ASIAN ELEPHANT
AND THE AFRICAN ELEPHANT.

THE ASIAN ELEPHANT IS A SMALLER
VERSION OF THE AFRICAN.

JUST JUDGING BY, YOU KNOW,
THE RELATIVE SIZE OF THIS THING,

THIS IS PROBABLY AFRICAN.

THE EYES ARE LOCATED RIGHT HERE
AND RIGHT THERE.

WITH PREDATORY ANIMALS,
EYES ARE MORE FORWARD-FACING.

IT'S FOR DEPTH PERCEPTION.

IT'S FOR HUNTING AND STUFF.

WITH PREY ANIMALS, THEIR EYES ARE
ACTUALLY MORE ON THE SIDE OF THEIR HEAD.

BY A WIDER FIELD OF VIEW, THEY
CAN ACTUALLY LOOK FOR PREDATORS.

MASSIVE ELEPHANTS MIGHT
ACTUALLY BE AFRAID OF ANTS.

SCIENTISTS HAVE FOUND
THAT THEY STAY AWAY

FROM A PARTICULAR TYPE
OF ACACIA TREE WHEN FEEDING

BECAUSE THE ANTS FOUND ON THE LEAVES
COULD MAKE THEIR WAY UP THEIR TRUNKS.

THE TRUNKS ARE FILLED
WITH SMALL NERVE ENDINGS

THAT THEY USE FOR BREATHING,
SMELLING, AND FIGHTING.

SO, ANY DAMAGE TO IT
COULD RESULT IN LIFE OR DEATH.

MY QUESTION IS, YOU KNOW,
IS IT WORTH ANYTHING TO YOU?

THE PRICE IS TYPICALLY BETWEEN, LIKE,
$3,000 AND MAYBE $5,000 OR SO.

WOW!

BUT BEFORE YOU GET YOUR HOPES UP,
WE DO HAVE A COUPLE OF CONCERNS.

ELEPHANTS ARE PROTECTED AND
REGULATED IN CERTAIN COUNTRIES.

BUT THERE ALSO ARE
OTHER COUNTRIES IN AFRICA

WHERE YOU ACTUALLY CAN
LEGALLY HUNT AN ELEPHANT

AND HAVE IT MOUNTED
AND HAVE THE BONES.

WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE TO LEAVE
THIS HERE TILL TOMORROW?

WE ACTUALLY HAVE AN ATTORNEY THAT
WE ASK CERTAIN QUESTIONS ABOUT

IF WE HAVE ANY LEGAL ISSUES
WHATSOEVER.

AND HE MIGHT BE ABLE TO TELL US
EXACTLY WHAT WE CAN DO WITH THIS.

WELL, SURE.
YEAH, NO PROBLEM.

GREAT.
GREAT.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANKS.

WHERE ARE WE GONNA STICK
THIS THING?

STEVE, A LONGTIME CUSTOMER AND KINETIC
SCULPTOR, IS LOOKING FOR A MEDICAL ANTIQUE

TO USE IN ONE
OF HIS INTERACTIVE PIECES.

SO I'M HEADED OVER
TO SEE A COLLECTION,

AND HOPEFULLY THERE'LL BE
SOMETHING THAT FITS THE BILL.

OH, HEY, VIKTOR.

HELLO, HELLO. COME IN.

WOW, I HEARD YOU HAD AN
IMPRESSIVE COLLECTION OF THINGS.

WORD TRAVELS FAST, I SEE.

WHAT AN ACCUMULATION.

YOU'RE LOOKING AT THE GRAVEYARD
OF PROJECTS PAST.

WOW!

I CREATE IMAGES FOR EXHIBITIONS.

I LIKE MEDICAL STUFF, MOSTLY RUSTY,
BLOODY, GRUESOME, AND OMINOUS.

I PRETTY MUCH SPEND
LONG, LONG DAYS BY MYSELF.

I'M ACTUALLY LOOKING FOR ODDS AND
ENDS FOR A KINETIC SCULPTOR.

I HAVE A LOT OF BITS AND PIECES
AND LEFTOVERS OF MEDICAL DEVICES.

OOH!

WOW!

METALLIC AND RUSTY.

CASTRATION EQUIPMENT.

THAT'S HIS AND HERS...
KIND OF... UH, YEAH.

THESE WERE MEANT TO PULL SOMETHING OUT OF
THE BODY, BUT IT ISN'T FOR CASTRATION.

THESE ARE ACTUALLY
DENTAL FORCEPS.

TOOTH EXTRACTION.

OKAY.
YOU'RE THE EXPERT.

VETERINARY.
AT LEAST A HORSE.

SEE THIS PIECE IN THERE,
HOW IT'S HOLLOWED OUT?

MM-HMM.

THAT'S VERY SPECIFIC
TO GRIPPING A TOOTH.

STICK YOUR FINGER
IN THERE.

YEAH, PULL MY FINGER.

IT'S POSSIBLE TO TELL THE AGE OF A
HORSE JUST BY LOOKING AT ITS TEETH.

A HORSE'S INCISORS START OUT
OVAL AND THEN BECOME ROUND,

AND EVENTUALLY THEY FLATTEN OUT.

AS A HORSE AGES, ITS GUMS ALSO
RECEDE, REVEALING MORE OF THE TEETH,

HENCE THE TERM
"LONG IN THE TOOTH"

TO DESCRIBE AN OLDER PERSON.

BUT THESE ARE BEAUTIFUL.
WHAT ARE YOU ASKING FOR THEM?

I DON'T KNOW.

$120 OR SOMETHING
FOR THESE GUYS.

OH. OKAY, THANKS.

THAT'S A COOL COLLECTION
OF THINGS.

YOU'RE VERY WELCOME.

I KNOW THEY'RE IN GOOD,
STRONG HANDS NOW.

HEY, WHAT'S UP, BLACKIE?

HEY, HOW YOU DOING, GUYS?
WELCOME BACK.

EARLIER, A CUSTOMER BROUGHT IN AN ELEPHANT
SKULL TO THE SHOP THEY WANTED TO SELL.

AND WHILE WE WOULD LOVE
TO BUY THIS THING,

WE WANT TO MAKE SURE
THERE'S NO LEGAL RAMIFICATIONS.

SO WE'RE HAVING OUR LAWYER,
RON KUBY, STOP BY AND ADVISE US.

HEY!
HEY, RON.

HEY, GUYS!
WHAT'S UP, MAN?

WHOA!

I'M BEGINNING TO UNDERSTAND WHY
YOU DIDN'T DROP BY THE OFFICE.

MY NAME IS RON KUBY.

I'M A CRIMINAL-DEFENSE AND CIVIL-RIGHTS
LAWYER HERE IN NEW YORK CITY.

THE THING I ENJOY MOST WHEN
I GET A CALL FROM OBSCURA IS

YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT IT IS YOU'RE GOING
TO SEE, WHAT IT IS YOU'RE GOING TO FIND,

WHAT THE LEGAL QUESTIONS
HAPPEN TO BE.

IT'S SOME ODD STUFF.

WHAT IS THIS?

FROM WHAT WE COULD TELL,
IT'S AN AFRICAN ELEPHANT.

WE DON'T KNOW EXACTLY WHERE
THIS PARTICULAR ONE CAME FROM

OR IF IT'S LEGAL
TO BUY OR SELL.

WE'D LOVE TO HAVE IT, BUT THERE
ARE A FEW DIFFERENT CONCERNS.

THAT'S RIGHT.

ELEPHANTS ARE WHAT WE CALL
AN ENDANGERED SPECIES.

RIGHT.

AND THE ENDANGERED SPECIES ACT
WAS PASSED IN 1973.

WHAT THAT ESSENTIALLY MEANS
IS THAT BUYING, SELLING,

POSSESSING WITH INTENT TO SELL...
OKAY.

IS COMPLETELY...

I BROUGHT UP THIS MACHINE
THAT I BELIEVE WE TALKED ABOUT.

OH!

I THINK YOU SHOULD
DEFINITELY TRY IT.

UH, I FOUND
SOME INTERESTING OBJECTS.

I'M ANXIOUS TO SEE
WHAT YOUR VISION IS.

THESE MAKE ME
VERY NERVOUS.

THIS IS "ODDITIES."

WHOA! WHAT IS THIS?

IT'S AN AFRICAN ELEPHANT.

WE DON'T KNOW EXACTLY WHERE
THIS PARTICULAR ONE CAME FROM.

ELEPHANTS ARE WHAT WE CALL
AN ENDANGERED SPECIES,

AND THE ENDANGERED SPECIES ACT
WAS PASSED IN 1973.

WHAT THAT ESSENTIALLY MEANS
AS FAR AS YOU'RE CONCERNED...

DEPENDING UPON THE PROVENANCE OF
THIS, WHICH YOU HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT,

IT MAY BE ENTIRELY ILLEGAL FOR
YOU TO CONDUCT YOUR TRANSACTION

IN THE STATE OF NEW YORK.

IT'S ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO DO
ANYTHING WITH THIS THING LEGALLY.

I'M THINKING
I'LL JUST GIVE IT BACK.

YEAH, MAN.

THAT WAS SOMEWHAT UNFORTUNATE
NEWS THAT WE DIDN'T WANT TO HEAR.

BETTER TO HEAR IT FROM ME THAN FROM THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF FISH AND WILDLIFE.

ABSOLUTELY.

BLACKIE.
RON, GREAT MEETING YOU.

YEAH, YOU, TOO.
GOOD LUCK.

THANKS SO MUCH
FOR THE INFORMATION.

TAKE CARE, GUYS.
ALL RIGHT.

I HAVE TO GET IT
OUT OF HERE.

STICK IT BACK WHERE IT CAME
FROM AND LESSON LEARNED.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANKS. NICE MEETING YOU.

I REALLY APPRECIATE
ALL YOUR HELP.

I'M ON THE HUNT FOR SOME MEDICAL
ANTIQUES FOR A KINETIC SCULPTOR

WHO WANTS TO USE THEM
IN ONE OF HIS PIECES.

I FOUND A FEW THINGS
THAT ARE OKAY,

BUT I'M STILL LOOKING FOR THAT ONE SPECIAL
PIECE THAT REALLY PUTS IT OVER THE TOP.

GOOD TO SEE YOU.
HI. GOOD TO SEE YOU.

THANKS FOR HAVING ME OVER.

I'M HEADED OVER TO VISIT
MY GOOD FRIEND MIKE,

WHO SAYS HE HAS SOMETHING
MECHANICAL THAT JUST MIGHT WORK.

COME ON IN.

OH, NICE!

MY GOODNESS.
IT'S JUST PERFECT.

SO, I CAN'T HELP BUT ASK,
WHAT'S UP WITH THAT SWORD?

IT'S EXTREMELY SHARP.

THIS IS A KRIS... K-R-I-S.

THIS SWORD WAS FROM THE PHILIPPINES,
AND IT'S PROBABLY 19th CENTURY.

THIS BELONGED
TO THE CHIEF OF THE ISLAND.

THIS HAS BEEN USED
AS AN EXECUTION SWORD.

OH, MY GOODNESS!

I LIVE HERE IN THE EAST VILLAGE.

I HAVE A NUMBER OF MEDICAL COLLECTIBLES
THAT I'VE PUT TOGETHER OVER THE YEARS

DERIVED FROM MY NEED
FOR HISTORICAL PIECES.

AND I HAVE TOO MUCH STUFF.

SO, THE SWORD'S PROBABLY SOMETHING YOU
MIGHT WANT TO LOOK AT ANOTHER TIME,

BUT I BROUGHT UP THIS MACHINE
THAT I BELIEVE WE TALKED ABOUT.

OH, I'D LOVE TO SEE IT.

IT'S UP THIS WAY.
SURE.

OH.

THE VITAMASTER.

AH.

I BELIEVE IT'S FROM THE 1960s.

I KNOW THEY HAD THEM EARLIER
IN THE '40s.

IT'S AMAZING THEY CONTINUED
TO MAKE THEM INTO THE '60s

CONSIDERING THEY DIDN'T REALLY
DO MUCH OF ANYTHING.

IT'S THAT RIDICULOUS IDEA
OF PASSIVE EXERCISE.

SO YOU DON'T DO ANYTHING, AND THE MACHINE
WILL EXERCISE YOUR MUSCLES FOR YOU.

THE IDEA IS
IF YOU START SHAKING THE BODY,

THE MUSCLE IS GOING TO SORT OF
COUNTERACT TO KEEP YOU ON BALANCE.

BUT YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT GONNA DO
ANYTHING FOR THAT CUPCAKE.

I'D ACTUALLY KIND OF LIKE
TO GIVE IT A WHIRL.

ALL RIGHT.

MAYBE
I CAN BE INVIGORATED.

I'M FEELING
A LITTLE SLUGGISH.

THIS WILL DO IT.
YEAH?

YEAH, THERE YOU GO.

ALL RIGHT.
LEAN BACK A LITTLE BIT.

YEAH, OKAY.

AH!

THIS FEELS NICE.
I'M TINGLING.

IT GOES UP PRETTY HIGH.

KEEP GOING.

OH, MY GOD.

NOW I'M STARTING TO FEEL
SLIGHTLY NAUSEOUS.

THIS IS "ODDITIES."

THE VITAMASTER.

I'D KIND OF LIKE
TO GIVE IT A WHIRL.

ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT.

UH, IT GOES UP PRETTY HIGH.

KEEP GOING.

UH... NOW I'M STARTING TO
FEEL SLIGHTLY NAUSEOUS.

I'M GONNA TURN IT OFF.

OHH.

SO, A HALF-HOUR ON THIS THING
WOULD BE AWFUL.

YOU'D LOSE YOUR LUNCH.

BUT I THINK, YOU KNOW, MAYBE 5 TO 10
MINUTES, YOU'D FEEL PRETTY INVIGORATED.

IT'S GOOD FOR SOMETHING.

YEAH.

GUY'S A KINETIC SCULPTOR.

HE LIKES WEIRD THINGS
THAT MACHINES DO.

THIS MIGHT
ACTUALLY WORK FOR HIM.

HOW MUCH
WOULD YOU WANT FOR IT?

$100?

I MEAN, THEY GENERALLY GO
FOR MAYBE 75 BUCKS.

I MEAN,
COULD I GIVE YOU $50?

SURE. I'LL TAKE $50.

THANK YOU.
OKAY, DEAL.

I'LL JUST STAY HERE.

HEY, STEVE.

WELL, HI, THERE.

GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
LIKEWISE.

CUSTOMER AND
FRIEND OF THE SHOP STEVE

SENT ME ON A MISSION TO FIND SOME UNUSUAL
MEDICAL ITEMS FOR USE IN HIS ARTWORK.

I FOUND A FEW THINGS
THAT I THINK WILL WORK.

I HOPE HE LIKES THEM.

SO IT WENT FAIRLY WELL.

I FOUND SOME INTERESTING OBJECTS
FOR YOU.

I'M ANXIOUS TO SEE
WHAT YOUR VISION IS.

UM... THESE MAKE
ME VERY NERVOUS.

UH-OH.

BUT I LOVE THEM.

THESE ARE ACTUALLY DENTAL FORCEPS
FOR HORSES, I'M ASSUMING.

THIS IS ABOUT AS BIG A DENTAL
FORCEP AS I'VE EVER SEEN.

THAT HORSE WOULD HAVE TO BE SEDATED,
I WOULD THINK, QUITE A BIT, RIGHT?

YOU WOULD HOPE.

THIS ONE'S A BIT SMALLER.

HAS A DIFFERENT GRIP TO IT
AND A DIFFERENT ANGLE.

WOW.

THEY'RE SWIMMING RIGHT NOW.

THAT'S GREAT.

YEAH, THESE WILL BE GREAT.
THANK YOU.

OKAY. THERE'S ACTUALLY
SOMETHING ELSE I FOUND.

OKAY.

MOVE IT OUT A LITTLE BIT.
YOU SAID MEDICAL-Y.

OH!

IT'S ONE OF THOSE
CRAZY-BUILT EXERCISERS.

IT HAS THE MOTOR,
AND THIS THING STILL WORKS.

YOU KNOW, IT'S SORT OF A QUACKY,
SORT OF, YOU KNOW,

"I DON'T WANT TO EXERCISE,
SO I'LL PUT THE BELT ON,"

SHAKES YOU UP
AND JIGGLES YOU ABOUT.

IT JUST SEEMS LIKE SOMETHING YOU MIGHT EVEN
BE ABLE TO TAKE APART AND REUSE SOMEHOW.

YEAH, IT'S GOT THAT OSCILLATING
MOVEMENT THAT I LIKE.

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING
FOR IT?

THIS WAS ACTUALLY
QUITE REASONABLE.

SO ALTOGETHER, WITH THE PLIERS AND
THIS FABULOUS EXERCISER... 300 BUCKS.

WELL...

YEAH. I'LL DO IT.

YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL.
ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.

EVEN THOUGH I SHOOK THINGS UP A BIT
WITH THE VITAMASTER, STEVE REALLY LOVED

THE THINGS I FOUND
FOR HIS KINETIC SCULPTURES.

YEAH.
THIS IS OUT OF CONTROL.

I THINK HE'S REALLY GONNA
SET THINGS IN MOTION.

ENJOY THE FISH.
I'M GONNA.