Nurse Jackie (2009–2015): Season 1, Episode 5 - Daffodil - full transcript

Previously:

I believe your daughter
Grace is experiencing signs

of generalized anxiety disorder.

Her pictures are
consistently devoid of color.

She never draws a sun.

Yeah.

Your daughter
has serious issues.

Issues? What issues?

She has a personality.

So we have a problem?

You think Grace
should be on drugs?



Jackie, they gave
us their opinions,

but we'll decide what's
best. What's to decide?

Hey, Eddie, it's me. I really
need to see you this morning.

For the pain.

Thank you.

This is where you
jump in, you tell me:

"You did everything you
could. It wasn't your fault."

Do you want me to say that?

When I tell you to order a
scan, you order a goddamn scan.

Because if you don't do
it, I'll go to the next doctor.

In the meantime, that kid
died, and it is all on you.

Dr. Cooper grabbed my tit today.

Did your tit make
the first move?

He says it was a Tourette's
response to stress.



There. Was that so hard?

Look at that. It's
supposed to be Florida.

Who draws Florida with no sun?

It's the goddamn Sunshine State.

Hey.

I'll get it, honey.
You sit down.

Why do you always have to work?

Yeah.

You know, give me a break, guys.

I'll be home before you know it.

Fi, that's gross.

Can't you stay home one time?

Yes, I can, but not tonight.

Believe me, it sucks for me too.

Come back to the table, Grace.

Let her go.

Breathe.

Pass the ketchup.

You haven't seen me.

Have you seen Mo-Mo?

Nope.

Okay, it's very simple.

Whatever they tell
you, you type in their file.

Whatever they don't tell
you but you know to be true,

type in their file.

Nights are different.

Yes. More stab
wounds, more drunks.

Less nut jobs, less children.

Okay, you prioritize

by severity of their condition.

Gunshots, stabbings,
cardiac arrest,

followed by bleeders
and shallow breathers.

Shallow breathers. Got it.

What about someone
who can't breathe at all?

They're dead. They
go to the waiting room.

Correction. When a patient
arrives unable to breathe

check their belongings
for identification.

Unconscious patients
bypass... Formal registration

until they are stabilized
and can provide information.

Or until their contact
arrives and does it for them.

She's a smart girl. Would
have figured that out.

I am actually pretty smart.
But also very nervous.

Can't relate. You don't
usually work nights.

What's up? You tell me.

You make the nurses' schedule,

always working with
your favorite people.

I'm concerned about
the level of socializing.

Michael!

Handcuffs?

You're 43.

He's 43.

You're a security guard.
Go secure something.

What is taking so long?

How come no one
has come to help him?

If he dies, baby,
you're moving out.

Suck my dick.

Your father slaves away,
then this is how you talk.

Everybody, get out of here.

Oh, out. Go.

A New Yorker.

Oh, stop with the cursing.

Do you mind?

Mr. Dzubenko, my name is Jackie.

Is it okay if I talk
to you for a minute?

We're still waiting
for your MRI,

but it looks like
you had a stroke.

I wanted to give
you a little test.

Is that all right?

Three questions. That's it.

Can you smile for me?

Okay. Can you lift
both arms for me?

Nice work.

Good work.

Can you say something to
me? It can be anything at all.

Okay. That's okay.

I hear you.

I need a pregnancy test.

Why, certainly.

Welcome.

My pleasure.

You have been here
three times in four months,

all for pregnancy tests.

I'm not talking to you.
This is an emergency room.

Go to a drugstore. Home
kits are like 15 bucks.

I don't have that kind
of money laying around.

Okay, now you do.
Get out of my ER.

Bitch.

I can't believe she
took the money.

Yeah, well, bullshit like
that comes in all the time,

clogs up the waiting room,
slows everybody down.

It wasn't even my 20.

I got it off a dead
guy in the morgue.

I was kidding,
Zoey. Just kidding.

I love jokes.

Get a wheelchair, please.

Hi, sweetie. What's your name?

Stephanie. My mom has lupus.

Good thing you're here.

How old are you, sweetie?

Ten. Double digits.

Well, then, your mom
goes to the front of the line.

Thank you.

But I go with her, right?

That's right.

Will you see if
Dzubenko has a bed?

Where is she going?
She's coming with me.

Not if it's over
the yellow line.

No one under the age of 15

is permitted over the
yellow line or in ICU.

That's a blatant lie.

That Nelson kid is only
4, and he's in the ICU.

He's on a ventilator.
He is still in the ICU.

You've got to be more
specific next time. Come on.

Who are you with, young lady?

My grandmom's
coming from Jersey.

Follow me. We're gonna wait
for her in the nurses' station.

It's all right, honey.

I'll come get you
in a little bit, okay?

Grinchy fucker.

It's killing me, Kevin.

She's 10, but
she's still my baby.

She's way too young
to be so miserable.

We'll figure this out.

I can't have all my girls
stressed out at once.

Please. Fiona is not stressed.

Yeah. It'd take a lot
to rattle that kid's cage.

She asked for a
blowtorch for her birthday.

Oh, my God.

I hope that's a joke.

Funny, maybe. A joke, no.

Listen, I got Queens covered.

Do something to take
your mind off it, all right?

Promise me you'll stop worrying.

I promise.

I love you.

Me too.

Hey. Come see me later?

You bet.

A minute?

Let me know when
the grandmother arrives.

That's it?

If no one comes, let's get
Social Services involved.

I'll be in my office.

What you doing? I
have a spelling test.

May I?

What was her blood
pressure this morning?

One-twenty over 80.

Is your grandma really coming?

You wanna see your mom?

This is the daughter.
Her name is Stephanie.

She's 10. Be cool.

Hello there, Stephanie.

How are you?

I'm Dr. Cooper.

Want a sticker?

Ten, not 2.

She's a kid, Jackie.

You think I'd bring her
here if she couldn't handle it?

I'm not always right, okay? But
what do you know about kids?

Just show her some
respect, please.

How about you let me do my job?

Your job is to provide your
patient with the best care,

which includes informing
the caregiver of her condition.

She is the caregiver. Get
your head out of your ass.

Are you kidding me?

Freak.

Hey, Coop. Hey.

Hey. Sportster or fat boy?

Uh, Sportster, 2005, 883L.

Nice.

Low saddle,
rubber-mounted engines.

You ride?

No, I'm into it, like I have

an appreciation
for it, but, you know.

I don't wanna deal with parking.

And the insurance on
these things? Fucking insane.

Your mother's convinced
you'll kill yourself, right?

Yeah, pretty much. Good call.

All right. Hey, where
you going to eat?

Umm...

You know, I'm probably
staying right around here.

I'll probably grab a
sandwich out of the caf.

Wrong answer.

No cafeteria food
for my buddy Eddie.

Tonight, it's you,
me and Quiznos.

Actually, I-I shouldn't, Coop.

Not listening. Quiznos.

Embrace the toasty
goodness, huh?

My stalker bought me a coffee.

I should have said no,

but he got to stare at
my ass as I walked away,

so it's a win for both of us.

Thor. God bless him.

How's Randy? He's good.

We got a flat-screen.

He let me watch the Jets

even though there
was skating on.

Oh, that's beautiful.

Make sure you put
that in your vows.

You need love
in your life, lady.

Seriously, I'm gonna set you up.

Yeah, seriously, do not.

If I had a choice between
George Clooney's cock

and this cup of
coffee, I'd go coffee.

Clooney's got a
house on Lake Como.

I'm just saying.

You are healthcare
professionals. Stop smoking.

Dr. Zander's head of Pulmonary.

Keep moving, Gloria.

He's trying to say something.

Thirsty?

He's got the damn
water right in front of him.

Bed pan?

Ew!

With stroke patients,
you have to slow down.

Give him a chance to
process what you're asking.

He's still in there.

I'm sorry.

You know my
husband better than me.

How do I get so lucky to have
a nurse who knows my Alex

so well? Thank you, God.

Listen, this man
has had a stroke.

You are lucky he's
alive, so be patient

or get out.

This is a hospital.
We're here to save lives.

Oh, famished.

Could really use a bite.

Oh, I can't tonight.

Sorry, have we met?

What could possibly
be more fulfilling

than dining with me?

I'll go.

Done.

Are you kidding me? I'm not.

That's how easily
you're replaced.

Small fork. Work
from the outside in.

Just excited to be
eating in a place like this.

And with a doctor.

Christ, what have I done?

I can't believe
people eat so late.

It's crazy.

Make-A-Wish Foundation.

I think it's really interesting

how you use humor

to cover up your real emotions.

Somebody in your past
must have really hurt you.

And I'm sorry for that,

because I think you're one
of the most generous people

I've ever met.

Darling...

the point of these
little feasts is to eat

and never to dip into
whatever the hell that was.

So if you think you've got a
chance of getting a pudding,

you better come up to the
surface where I can breathe.

Okay?

Next subject.

My dad's in prison
for manslaughter.

Fabulous. Go.

Miller, Radiology,
line four. Dr. Miller...

Eddie.

Hey, Jackie. Why
don't you pull up a chair?

I still have some left.

Yeah, it's okay.

No, you know what? I'm good.

I have to... I was gonna...

I just wanted to get the...

Never mind. Heh.

She's kind of... you know?

She can sort of
come off a little:

"Grrr. I am Jackie. Bow to me."

But I did grab her boob
once. She was cool about it.

Her boob, really?

Oh, shit, man.

Now you're looking at me
like I'm some kind of perv.

I swear to God, bro,
it was a total accident.

I have this neurological thing.

It's sort of like a
physical stutter.

You're so full of shit.

You didn't hear it from me,

but Mo-Mo wants a
slice of pepperoni pizza

and a sugar doughnut.

Look at you matchmaking.

Thanks for the tip. You got it.

I know it's not really your
thing, but hear me out.

An asymmetrical bob

and the slightest
touch of bronzer...

Thank you, Thor.

She's much better already.

It's gonna be hard, but
I... I know you can handle it.

All we did was share a sandwich.

Well, what's next? He's
gonna buy you a houseboat?

It killed me when you walked
in. I couldn't get rid of the guy.

This...? This is
all for one patient?

Yeah.

Her 10-year-old's
taking care of her.

The insurance is shit.

You're a good
egg, Jackie Peyton.

I don't know about that.

So you have my cell
number, day and night.

Yes, thank you.

And Dr. Cooper
wanted me to tell you

what a great job you're
doing with your mom.

He was very impressed.

Thanks.

I could have got
these by myself.

I know, I know. You've
got better things to do.

You have a spelling
test tomorrow.

Daffodil.

D-A-F-F-O-D-I-L.

Hello. What did you say to me?

When is he allowed to get out?

You should not speak
to each other like this.

You speak to him like that.

Oh, fine.

Dr. Davis, please
call the pharmacy.

Dr. Davis, call the pharmacy.

Note cards?

You think he can
read note cards?

He won't even nod
his head yes or no.

"Shut the fuck up."

"Seriously."

For the love...
Whose Taser is this?

This is a weapon, okay?

Danger.

This should not be
lying around a hospital.

It's like running a
special-ed preschool.

Taser?

Been there, sister.

Fifteen minutes,
you're good as new.

Here we go.

Let me... Get off of me.

Get off me now.

You ate my pizza
and my doughnut.

Umm... I had to listen to Thor

perform three new
songs from his club act.

I earned it.

Well, see you.

Mrs. Akalitis?

I see your feet.

I can spot a pair of Easy Spirit
career collection from 20 paces.

It was an accident.

Something that would
have never happened

if you all took more
pride in the integrity

of maintaining your workplace.

You Tasered yourself.

Hey, buddy. Come here.

Hey, stop him.

Hey!

Hey. Hey.

I got you.

I got this.

Whoa!

Got him.

You're all right. I'll
see you tomorrow.

I'm not what you think I am.

I am.

I know that you do what
you think you have to

to get the job done.

But I have been fucking
the system for over 30 years.

There's not a move
in this repertoire

that I haven't already seen.

We'll see.

Hey, honey.

Did you have a long night?

There was this kid.

Yeah?

How was Gracie?

She had a meltdown.

Her pencil kept breaking
and she couldn't...

She fell apart.

Okay.

Okay.

I'll be up.

Hello.

Nurse Jackie, it's Stephanie.

Hi.

Hi, sweetie. How are you?

Um, I'm sorry to call you.

Please don't be sorry.

Take a deep breath.

Tell me what's going
on with your mom.

Well, I gave her the Anatrin
after she ate, like you said,

but she just woke
up, and her arm...

She can't really move it.

It hurts too much.

All right, sweetie, listen.

This is what you're
gonna do, okay?

Find a Percocet.
That's the blue one.

And get a butter knife

and cut the pill in half, okay?

Do you have any cranberry juice?

Yes.

Okay.

Take half the pill,

give it to your mom
with a little bit of juice.

All right?

Okay.

She'll be fine.