Northern Exposure (1990–1995): Season 6, Episode 23 - Tranquility Base - full transcript

You, Barbara.

You here to share with me
my inaugural weekend
in my new summer lodge...

(CHUCKLING) It's more
than a man could ask for.

Looks pretty good
from over here, too,
mister.

I almost wish
nobody else was coming.

And waste all that
good food you bought?

(LAUGHING)

Well, everything
in its time.

We'll have time
for everything.

Well, I've got the Parcheesi,
the Yahtzee and the
Trivial Pursuit.

In the sideboard, Ed.
Well, we better hop to.



We've got a houseful
of people coming.

We've got to open up
the house,

air it out,
uncover the furniture.

(CHUCKLES)

(GUN FIRES)

ED: Wow!

Another vole, Barbara?

As you were, gentlemen.
I'll dispose of the remains.

That's five in a row.
Right in the head, Maurice.

Ed, can you keep a secret?

Not a peep,
you understand?

Champagne?

Not just champagne, Ed.
This is Krug,
Clos du Mesnil '83.

(CHUCKLING)
It's for Barbara and me.



I'll tell you, I had to
squeeze a few peaches
to get this.

My lips are sealed,
Maurice.

Oh, no!
Not the champagne, Ed.
That's not the secret.

No.

The secret is that
I'm planning to ask
Barbara Semanski

for her hand this weekend.

Her hand?
Yeah.

Oh, her hand!
Congratulations, Maurice!

Congratulations!

Hi, honey.
Hi.

We're all packed,
ready for the weekend.

Good.

What's wrong
with your foot?

Oh, it's just a blister.

You're not wearing
any socks?

There were too many of them
in the drawer, Phil.

Cotton. Knee-high. Ankle.
Wool. I couldn't decide.

(CHUCKLES)
See, it's getting worse.

It's not just the
big things anymore.

Should I go back
to journalism?

Should I have a baby?

It's now down to
the little things,
ridiculous things.

I can't decide
anything anymore.

Everybody has trouble
making decisions
sometime or another.

Oh, I guess.

Okay, what can I get for you?

Denver plate, eggs easy,
hold the scallions,
tomato 'stead of potatoes.

Okay.

And a corn muffin for me,
toasted,

with a nice, big scoop
of cottage cheese.

Okay. Thanks.

See? See how easy that was?

Didn't even have to
think about it.

They knew just
what they wanted.
Why can't I do that?

You can.

You know when it started?
It was those truckers
and the pie.

Oh, fork on the left or right?
Gosh, which looks best?

(SIGHS)

Honey, honey, look at you.
You're exhausted.

(SIGHS)

Now, we have a whole
weekend at Maurice's
to just rest and relax.

Just finish up your setups
and let's go out
to the country

and enjoy ourselves, okay?

(GIGGLES)
Doctor's orders.

You're right. You're right.
I'll try.

Okay.
Okay.

Ed, these lemon drop dishes
are a little stingy.

Top them off, will you?

And start to air out
that cabernet.

Our guests will be here
pretty soon, and... Whoa!

Barbara.

Maurice.

Wow! You are a vision.

Spring sale. Target.

Not only beautiful
but practical as well.

Barbara, before
our guests get here...

They're here!
I hear the truck.
Everybody's here!

(SIGHS)

(ENGINE SPLUTTERING)

Sounds like a bad rotor.

Yeah, if I'm lucky.
Yeah.

MICHELLE:
Here you go, Holling.
Hope he's got
a welcome spread.

Ride worked on my appetite.

He always does.

Cool, huh, Doc?
Yeah.

(GROWLING)

Hey, Holling?

Oh, sorry, Doc.
He's just kind of
territorial right now.

He's in rut.

Rut again, huh?

He's in a rut?

„In rut,” Phillip.

Vincoeur's been
in the bush so long,

he's picked up
the sexual biorhythms
of the caribou bull.

Okay.

Wait a minute, so you're
telling me he's in rut?

(STOMPING)

(GROWLING)
SHELLY: Thank you.

Welcome, friends!
I see the eagle has landed.

Barbara and I would
like to welcome

each and every one of you
to Tranquility Base!

MAURICE:
We are surrounded here

by 1,500 plus acres

of virgin old-growth forest.

We've got mountain streams.
We've got a glacier-fed lake.

We've got everything here,
from sports...

Oh, thanks.

...to nature to good
old-fashioned leisure.

It's all laid out there
in that brochure that
Ed's handing out to you.

Maurice, kinda need to know
where we're crashing, ASAP.

Oh, of course. I'm sure
we all want to wash up
after that dusty journey.

Ed, the bunk roster, please?

All right. Vincoeurs,
you'll be quartered
in the Wally Schirra.

A lovely suite overlooking

(STAMMERING) the front lawn...

Miss Miller, Mr. Kupfer,
you'll be in Buzz Aldrin.

Capras,
you're in Chuck Yeager.

Ed, Chris, in Alan Shepard.

Marilyn, you'll have
Jim Lovell to yourself,
because Maggie is a no-show.

No biggie.

All right. Now, Barbara,
if you'll show Miss Whirlwind
and the Capras to their room,

I'll take care of the
rest of these folks here.

(WHISTLES)
Okay, listen up, people.

Whirlwind, down the hall,
make the first right,
door next to the head.

Capras...
Barbara, Barbara, excuse me.

(STAMMERING) I meant,
show them to their rooms.
That'd be nice.

Oh. Okay, sure.
No problem.

This way.

Now, if the rest of you
folks will follow me.

Miss Miller, Mr. Kupfer.

Just get our bags.

Thank you, my good man.

Spelunking, paddle boating.
Gosh, there's so much stuff.

Well, don't worry about it,
honey. We're gonna go on
the nature walk.

Hey, you guys.

One complimentary
fruit basket
and extra blankets.

Oh, well, that's great, Ed.
Thanks. Anywhere's fine.

MICHELLE: Thanks, Ed.

The nature walk,
honey, are you sure?

What about the
wildflower pressing?
We could start a scrapbook.

Great idea. Scrapbook.

But then we'd miss
the nature walk.

Okay, then the nature walk.

I didn't say that, Phil.

Did I?

Tell you what,
why don't you go
on the wildflower thing

and I'll do the
nature hike, okay?

You're sick of me,
aren't you?

No. No, not sick of you.
I...

MICHELLE: Well, maybe
I'll just stay in bed.

Or hide in the closet.
Or, hey, under the rug!

PHIL: Michelle,
come on, honey...

(DOOR SLAMS)

(CLOCK CHlMlNG)

Maurice.

Oh, hello, Ruth-Anne.

Have you come to get a jump
on my geology lecture?

Look here.

Did you ever see
a finer piece of
variegated dolomite?

Yes, it's very nice,
but I need to have
a word with you.

Sure.

Walt didn't want me
to say anything

because we're guests
in your house, you know.
Uh-huh.

But Barbara confiscated
Walt's whittling knife.
That drop-blade of his.

She did?

He was working on
a piece of red cedar

and she jumps
out of the bushes

and demands
that he hand it over.

He got it in ltaly,
for heaven's sake.
The man's a war hero.

Don't worry, Ruth-Anne.

I'll talk to Barbara and
we'll get Walt's knife back.

(CHUCKLES)
Thank you.

Yeah.

Hayden, Maurice told me
to bring you these tools

so you could fix your truck
and go home.

Just set 'em down
over there, Ed.

I gotta think it through.

You don't wanna be
popping any manifolds
until I got a plan, right?

Right.

You could soak
them spark plugs
in a little gas for me.

And, oh, while you're up,
could you grab me
another cold one?

Spark plugs and a cold one.

Hey, Eduardo!

Hayden. Huh? What a life!
Fresh air. Lime Rickey.

You're telling me.
I told Marsha
I'd be home in time

to paint her kid's
back bedroom.

Couple studs like us
on the loose, huh?
Wood nymphs, beware!

Captain, what do you say
we take to the woods

and secure us
a little female pulch?

The woods?

Hey, it's crawling with it.

You got geologists.
Spelunkers.

Occasional lost camper.

I don't think so.

Hayden, it's guaranteed.
I never been on
a babe scout yet

where I didn't come back
with a little something,
you know what I'm saying?

No, it ain't my style.
Me and Marsha, you know,
we got our own.

We're tight,
you know what I mean?

Hmm.

Yeah, I do.
Hey, more for me, then.

Ciao.
See you later.

What are you trying
to tell me, Maurice?

Well, I'm the host.
As hostess, you're my backup.

It's my duty, and hopefully
you'll see it as yours,

to make sure our guests
are comfortable.

That they enjoy themselves.

They don't want to
police up after themselves.

If they want to leave
a half a cup of coffee,

or a little crust
of muffin...

I didn't want ants
overrunning the place.

No, of course not.
But they're here
to enjoy themselves

and it's their prerogative
to do so.

For example,
if one of our guests wants
to whittle with his knife,

he should have
his whittler, right?

Even if it's a Class C felony
carrying a year in jail?

Barbara, this is
my personal property,

and I doubt that
Walt Kupfer's gonna shank
anybody with his blade.

So you're asking me
to look the other way?

Well...

In a word, yeah.

Look, while you're here
at Tranquility Base,

can you just try to leave
your badge in the drawer?

I mean, everybody likes
to get away from his job
once in a while.

Well...

For you?

Deal.

(CHUCKLES)

Thanks, Barbara.

(KISSES)

Dr. Capra, you look
like you could use
an Arctic iced tea.

(CHUCKLING) You know,
I think you're right, Ed.

I just happen to have one
on the back porch for you.

Can I ask you a question,
Dr. Capra?

Yeah, sure, why not?

Well, I'm here helping Maurice
this week,

well, mostly because
I said I would.

But I'm also a shaman
in training, you know.

Yeah, I know.
A hyphenate.

(CHUCKLES)

Well, my shaman instructor,
Leonard,

he says that
unasked-for advice

can be taken as
an act of hostility.

But if I see someone
doing something
that's bad for them,

isn't it my duty as a shaman,
a healer, to tell them?

Well, if you think
it's important that they know,
yeah.

It's you, Dr. Capra.

Me?

Yeah, well,
you and Mrs. Capra.

The way you've been making
all her decisions for her,
like in your room.

What, you mean
that wildflower thing?

(SCOFFS) She just wants
to do it all, that's all.

I'm sure she's having
a great time.

Yeah. Well, that.
Laying out all her
socks and shoes.

Filling out all her
activity and menu cards.

I don't know
what else to do, Ed.

I don't know
what's wrong with her,

why she can't make
her own decisions.

I've run every test,
blood, bile, and she's clean.

I'm not surprised.

What, then, some mild
form of aphasia?

Or some obscure
Oliver Sacksian
neurological syndrome?

She's just...

She's just having
a hard time making up
her mind, Dr. Capra.

You're not helping by
making all her decisions
for her, either.

It's just easier, that's all.

Well, but not in the long run.

You're an enabler, Phil.
And enabling hurts
the enabler, too.

You think for her,
then you get mad at her

because you're
thinking for her,

and then you feel used,
that makes you feel sorry
for yourself.

Phil, just say no.

She's gonna have to
learn to think for
herself sometime.

(SIGHS)

I better get back
to work now.

(RUSTLING)

SCHULMAN: Whoa!
Look out below! Look out!

Hey!

(GRUNTING)

Whoa! My goodness,
are you all right?

I think I'm all right.
But I'm stuck.

Could you give me a hand
with this clasp here?

Through the other end.

Gosh, you know,
you're lucky.

(GRUNTING)
You could have
really been hurt.

Oh, yes. Oh, I haven't been
in one of these since D-day.

82nd Airborne.

Oh, well, why are you
skydiving in a suit?

That's a good question.

One minute I'm in shul
studying the Talmud,

Rabbi Braude's commentary
on Rabbi Goldstein's
commentary

on the meaning
of God's words to Moses
at the burning bush,

when, suddenly...

(CLlCKlNG)

It's a clicker.

Hmm.

We had these in Normandy
when we were trying
to find each other. Hmm.

(STAMMERING)
Wait, I'm sorry.
I don't understand.

You went off-course,
is that it?

It depends. Where am I?

Mount Avery.
Near Cicely, Alaska.

Alaska? Alaska again?

Hmm.

Must be to find Joel.
What's he up to now?

Joel?
Oh, Dr. Fleischman?

Yes. You know him?

Oh, you know, he's gone.
He went back to New York.

Gone? Then why am I here?

Excuse me. Alan Schulman.
You can call me rabbi.

Yeah. I'm the
new doctor's wife.
I'm Michelle Capra.

Capra?
Doesn't sound Jewish.

No. I'm Catholic.
Polish, actually.

My maiden name
was Schowdoski.

Hmm. So why am I here?

You know, rabbi,
you ought to come back
to the lodge with me.

The lodge? I don't know.
I have this clicker.

Maybe I'm supposed to use it.
Decisions.

(CLlCKlNG)

Decisions.
(LAUGHING) Yeah! Decisions.

MICHELLE: Rabbi?

Rabbi?

(BEDSPRINGS CREAKING WILDLY)

(KlCKlNG)

Shelly! Holling!

Hey, you guys, it's me, Ed.

I brought you some dinner.
Thought you might be hungry.

All right. Well,
I'm just gonna set it down
outside the door here.

(DOOR OPENS)

(HOLLING GRUNTS)

(DOOR CLOSES)

Something I can help you with,
Miss Whirlwind?

I need another pillow.

Problem with the pillow
you were given?

Is something wrong, ladies?

She wants another pillow.

Mine was lumpy.

Barbara, isn't this exactly
what we were talking about?

If a guest wants
another pillow,

then we give them
another pillow.

I was, if you could've kept
your gun in your holster.

You were?

This one's good.
Good night.

Against my better judgment,
I might add,

unless you want them all
traipsing through here
exchanging bedding.

Hi, Officer Semanski.
Bye, Officer Semanski.

(DOOR CLOSES)

So, did you ask her yet,
Maurice?

Ed, stow that paddle,

and put out the coffee
and the pastries
in mission control.

Some of them
wanna play charades.

ED: Uh, dentures!
MAURICE: Teeth!

RUTH-ANNE: Oh.
Uh-uh.

(MICHELLE GRUNTING)
False teeth.

Upper plate.

Plate...
My Dinner with Andre!

(GRUNTS)
WALT: Yeah.

ED: Rowing a boat.

HAYDEN: Dancing a jig!

Walking, stepping.

Teeth stepping.

(MICHELLE GRUNTING)
ED: Uh...

Stevens, my man,
back from the hunt?

Seem to be.

Babeless?

Nothing out there.
It's weird. It's different.

(GRUNTING)
WALT: What?

Do I seem different
to you?

MICHELLE: Okay.

No.
ED: Waterway?

Maybe it's the woods.

(MUTTERING)

ltches.
Hmm, hmm.

MARILYN: Sounds like...
Mmm-hmm.

Witches!
Witches of Mad!

ltches of mad?

Madness of King George!

Buh... Buh...
Bridges!

(YELLS)

Bridges of...
Bridges of Madison County!

Yes!

(ALL EXCLAlMlNG)
MICHELLE: Yes!

RUTH-ANNE: Good!
MAURICE:
What took you guys so long?

We win, we win!

No way, Jose!

PHIL:
Those were great clues, honey.

lnfraction! Nope!
That doesn't count.

She said „buh.”

Barbara, shh, okay?

I will not! That point
should be deducted.

She cheated! I heard her.

Barbara, please,
it's just a parlor game!
Now, shh.

I will not.
And let go of me!

Barbara, just...
Quit telling me what to do!

Barbara, just calm down.

I said, „off,” bub!
Shove!

(CHUCKLING) Barbara,
that's enough now!

You asked for it.

Ow! Ow!

(CHUCKLING)

Barbara!

That Barbara Semanski,
wicked right hand.

Wouldn't wanna get
on her bad side.

Hey, what are you
doing, Ed?

Buttoning my P.J .s .

It's still the shank
of the evening.

Let's get us a sixer,
go launch the craft
like we used to.

I don't think so, buddy.

Maurice wants
kolaches for breakfast,
I got to get up really early.

Yeah, we'll pull
an all-nighter,
then, huh?

We'll get us
a little cognac, huh?

Keep us peppy.

Oh, I don't know.
I'm kind of tired.
It's been a long day for me.

(SCOFFS)

Hey, that's never
stopped us before.
Come on!

(CHUCKLES)

Sorry, buddy.

I'll say.

MAURICE: Barbara, please.

I'm tired of talking.
Time for walking.

So it's come to this.

I wear a badge, mister.
That's me.

If that don't cut the mustard,
then sayonara.

(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)

Hayden, man,
I've been looking for you!

Come on, get your stuff.
I'm taking you fishing.

Fishing, now?

Yeah. Nighttime's the
best time for bullheads.

Aw, Chris, there's
too many mosquitoes.

Mosquitoes? Well...

Hey, the boss has got to
have some repellent
around here somewhere.

Yeah, maybe.

Hey, hey.
Hayden, look at that.

HAYDEN: What's that?
Champagne?

You got it. A little bubbly.
Party time!

No, I pass.
You know, I get a little
destructive on champagne.

I still owe the steakhouse
up there in Sleetmute

some money
for their jukebox.

Hayden, come here.

Hold this for me
right here, would you?
What?

Just stand right here
and hold that.

Hmm. What's this?
Yeah.

„Krug, Clos du Mesnil, 1983.

Grande Cuvee.” Hmm.

Ooh...

(SCREAMS)

Holy... Wait...

Hey, I can't believe it.
I saw that in a movie once,
Hayden.

You could've
cut my fingers off!

Let's party!

Pour it up, buddy.
Pour it up.

You two clowns mind
squelching that racket?

Trying to get a little
shut-eye around here.

Yes, Officer.

Well, I'm still up,
and somebody's got to have
a little fun around here!

Hayden?

Thanks anyway, man.

Yeah? Skoal!

(lMlTATES GLASS CLlNKlNG)

(SLURPS)

(BEDSPRINGS CREAKING)

Good kolaches.
Oh, thanks, Marilyn.

MICHELLE: What's over there?
Plenty of apricot.

PHIL:
Okay, that sounds fine.

Oh, Hayden? Hayden,
Maurice wanted me to ask...

About the truck?
I'm on it. I'm on it, man.

Cool.

Seat taken?

Hey, buddy.

Whoa, you okay, Chris?

Never better, never better.

You don't look so good.

You should've been there,
amigo.

Finished off that bottle
of French fizz.

Got a quick six of Colt 45s.

How about some
Extra Strength Tylenol?

Yeah, all right.

So what do you think, Phil?
The morel hunt?

I think you'd like it.

But it's up to you,
you know.

I mean,
if you want to go, go.
If you don't, don't.

Are you going?

No.

Oh.

So maybe I shouldn't go.

Maybe.

Are you telling me not to?

No. I'm not
telling you anything.

So I should go then?

No, I didn't say that.

Phil...
Look, Michelle,

I think it's important
that you make this decision
on your own.

I mean, you can do it.
I know you can.

(DOOR OPENING)
ED: Maurice?

Two dropped eggs on toast,
hash browns, black coffee
and orange juice.

Just put them down anywhere.

Swelling's gone down some.
Did you ask her?

What?

Officer Semanski.
Pop the big one?

Are you out of your mind?

Look, Ed, that...

That mission is scrubbed.
Aborted.

Barbara will be leaving
as soon as one of her cronies

can get here
in a black-and-white.

I'm sorry, Maurice.

Ed, do you know why
I really bought this place?

Because I wanted
a family compound,

kinda like what Jack Kennedy
had in Hyannis Port.

Touch football on the lawn,
deal-making on the porch.

Children underfoot.

(CHUCKLING)

Oh, well.

A lot of my other dreams
came to fruition.

„The tumult and
the shouting dies

The captains and
the kings depart.”

All right, mycophiles.
This is your quarry.

The morel mushroom.
Latin name, angusticeps.

And a sweeter representative
of the Morchella family
never drew nitrogen.

But the morel doesn't
easily give up her favors.

You have to court her.

Can any of you
find the mushroom?

ALL: No. No. No.

(MARILYN EXCLAIMS)

lmpressive.

Oh!
Wow!

(ALL CHUCKLING)

Well, at first,
you can't see them anyplace,

but once you get in the zone,
you see them everywhere.

RUTH-ANNE: Any questions?
No.

Good luck.

(CHUCKLES)
Okay.

(CLlCKlNG)

(CLlCKlNG ROCKS TOGETHER)

MICHELLE: Rabbi?

(CLlCKlNG)

Rabbi?

Oh, hello again.

I'm really glad to see you.

Really?

Yeah. So, you wandered off
so quickly.

Well, I have a lot on my mind.
I can't seem to find my unit.

What are you doing in
this neck of the woods?

(STAMMERING) Oh,
I'm on a mushroom hunt,

only now I'm not sure
how to get back to the lodge.

No need to worry.
I have a map.

You do? Oh, great.

Let's see, Utah Beach...
Omaha Beach...

Cherbourg?
Sainte-Mere-Eglise? What?

This is the map
I had in Normandy
50 years ago.

Hell, I'm all farblondget.

Here I am in Alaska
with a World War ll clicker,

no Joel,
and a wandering Gentile.

At least in the past,
I had some clue of
what was going on.

You mean this has
happened to you before?

(STAMMERING)
You just show up
out of the clear blue sky?

Never by parachute.
One time Joel fished me
out of a lake.

Another time,
just before Yom Kippur,

I materialized
in his bedroom.

(CHUCKLES)

You know, rabbi,
I really should be
getting back to the lodge.

And think maybe you should
come with me, too.

To the lodge?
Yeah.

Why not? Who's to say?

Good. Good.

Oh, only,
which way do we go?

(CHUCKLING) There's an old
Yiddish proverb.

„When you don't know
where you're going,

every road will
take you there.”

(BIRDS SCREECHING)

Oh, another one.

Hey, you better get
with the program, buddy.

Can't do it, Hayden.

Sure you can.
Just look under the trees!

Can't lie to myself anymore.

I miss her, bad.

Yeah, but what about
all them wood nymphs?

History, man. I've changed.

Rounded a corner.

Chris Stevens
is a bachelor no more.

Look at that.

That's just like Maggie.
It was there all the time,
only I didn't see it.

And I let her go
without a peep.

South.

(DOOR OPENS)

(CLEARING THROAT)

(DOOR CLOSES)
Two, bam.

Hey, have any of you
seen Michelle?

No. I haven't.

She went off by herself.

Okay. Thanks.

WALT: Sure.

Well, one thing is for sure.
We're lost.

The final insult.
God's big joke
on Rabbi Schulman.

(CHUCKLES)
What do you mean?

You want
the short version?
(LAUGHS)

A couple of years ago,
my congregation wanted
to kick me upstairs,

rabbi emeritus.

A lot of changes
were going on.
Yeah.

Female cantor, new liturgy.
Hmm.

The board didn't think
I could roll with it.

No, but you did. Good.
Yes.

(LAUGHS)
Things worked out
pretty good.

So, last month,
with my house in order,

I thought maybe
I'd lay down the reins

and devote myself to study.

You know, no more
sisterhood breakfasts
and bar mitzvahs.

Just quiet time for
meditation and prayer.

Mmm, sounds nice.

Hmm, so what happens?
My sciatica starts acting up.

Oh, no.

Every time I sit at my desk,
I get these shooting pains
down my legs.

So now I have to read
lying down.

But I can't concentrate
lying down.

Oh!

My wife says if I don't
stop being such a grump,

she's gonna throw me
right out of the house.

(CHUCKLING) Yeah. He hasn't
said anything,

but my husband's
losing it with me, too.

I can't make decisions
anymore,

from what to wear to
what to do with my life.

It's like
I can't move forward
and I can't look back.

Hmm. Perfect.
A dysfunctional rabbi
and a paralyzed Catholic

howling in the wilderness.

(LAUGHS)

Well, the Lord works in
mysterious ways, hmm?

Or not.

Rabbi, look! My...

Oh, my God!

We should put it out!
No, no, don't.
It's a bush.

MICHELLE: Huh?
It's a burning bush.

Like with Moses.

I mean, look around.
You see anything else
on fire?

A burning bush?
It's a message.

The voice of God.

Finally, all of this
is going to begin
to make sense.

I don't hear...
Shh!

Come on, we're listening.

It's starting
to go out, rabbi.

No, it can't go out.
It can't.

We haven't gotten
the message yet.

No, please. Please!
Oh, God.

(BLOWING)

(STAMMERING) Rabbi,
it's not a message from God.

Maybe it was the
lightning or something.

No. Please!

(SIGHS)

BARBARA: The slides of
our weekend on the Yorktown.

I'd like to keep those,
if you don't mind.

You can keep
the BlackHawk, too.

I've got another .357
I use for deer.

No, thank you.

...the sam hill?

Michelle never came home
from the mushroom hunt.

She's out there somewhere.
It's all my fault!

Come on!
Wait a minute!
Hold it, hold it.

Maurice, she doesn't
know the woods.

(WHISTLE BLOWS)
She's never even
been camping.

Listen up!
We need a search party,
not a mob scene.

Bill, crack out
the walkie-talkies,
megaphone and flashlights.

Miller, split this group
into teams, two by number.
All right.

Maurice, you should have
topo maps of the area?
Sure.

We'll need copies
for each team penciled
in 100-yard squares.

Right.
Well, don't just
stand there.

Nobody panics.

We proceed to the target area
in a line 10 yards apart.

From there we initiate
a grid search on my command.

What was your wife wearing
when you last saw her?

A green coat and blue jeans.

Make a note of it, people.
A green coat and blue jeans.

(BIRDS SCREECHING)

(EXCLAlMlNG)

(CURSING lN POLISH)

What was that?

Oh, it's just something
my father used to say.

Piltz used to say that.

Who?
Stanley Piltz.

He was a private
in my unit.

Piltz?
Yeah. P-I-L-T-Z.

Uh-huh.
Polish. Like you.

Like you,
he couldn't make his
mind up about anything.

Really? Hmm.

He was from Cincinnati,
a plumber.

Tell me more about him.

He used to ask me questions
about everything.

From philosophy to
what to have for breakfast.

(LAUGHING)
That's just like me.

Got to the point,
I used to duck every time
I saw him coming.

„Schulman, can I
ask you a question?

Schulman, can I ask you...”
Drive me nuts.

That's just like me and Phil.

Last time I saw him was
over the Channel, D-day,
just before we had to jump.

Piltz wanted to talk.
Like everybody else
on the plane,

I had other things
on my mind.

And when it came time
to jump, he couldn't do it.

What do you mean?

He froze in the doorway.

It wasn't that he was
afraid to jump, really,

it was just that he
couldn't make up his mind
whether to go or not.

He took his parachute
off the static line,

let everybody else go by.

As I went by, he said,
„Schulman, can I ask you
a question?”

(BOTH LAUGHING)
No!

It was too late,
I had to go.

Never did find out
what he wanted to ask.

A few minutes later
the plane was shot down
with Piltz still in it.

Wow.

Michelle!

HAYDEN: Michelle?

Michelle!

Mrs. Capra?
MARILYN: Mrs. Capra!

Mrs. Capra?
WALT: Mrs. Capra!

Man, I never should have
let her go.

It's not your fault,
Dr. Capra.

I'm just an apprentice
shaman.

I should never
have interfered.

No, you were just
trying to help, Ed.

Leonard says you lose one
every now and then, but...

Ed, we're gonna
find her, okay?

Just keep looking,
all right?

Maybe if I'd listened
to Piltz a little more,

maybe he would've jumped
from that plane.

And maybe,

sitting in my study
all day long, reading...

(CLlCKlNG)

Maybe that's not my path.

I need to be with people,
minister to my congregation.

Maybe that's why you and I
were thrown together,
to remind me of that.

Oh, so what does that
say about me?

That I'm like
Private Piltz?

Piltz was afraid of
making a decision

for fear of making
the wrong decision.

That's no way to live.

You make a mistake, so what?
So you move on.

It's better than
standing still.

Ah.

Well, gotta get back
to my mishpoche.

You know what? Suddenly,
my sciatica doesn't hurt
as much anymore.

(LAUGHS)
How about that?

Wait, rabbi.
What about me?

I'll give you the same
advice I'd give Piltz
if I had a second chance.

Jump.
For God's sake, jump.

Right. Okay.

Oh. But which path?
Left or right? Rabbi?

Rabbi?

Right. Jump. Jump.

(GRUNTING)

It's 18:00. Sunset's 18:20.

We'll reform in groups
of three and...

(SNlFFlNG)
Holling?

He's got the scent!

Follow him!

(SNlFFlNG)

Michelle!

Michelle.

PHIL: Oh, honey!
Oh, hi, Holling!

Honey? Hey, how you doing?
You okay?
I'm okay. Yeah.

I'm gonna get you
in for x-rays,

check for possible
concussion.

I'm fine, Phil. Really.

Well, you've been muttering
about a rabbi, Utah Beach.

It's all my fault.
I never should have
let you go.

Oh, would you stop, honey?

No, don't worry about it.
It won't happen again.

From now on
I'm gonna stick with you.

No, you know what, Phil?

Letting me go in the woods
was the best thing
you could've done.

Really?

Yeah.

You hungry?
Oh!

You know, what I'd like
is a turkey club
with extra mayo,

hold the tomatoes,
on toasted whole wheat.

(CREAKING)

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

I guess
rutting season's over.

Till next year.

(WALT CHUCKLES)

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

MICHELLE:
This is delicious, isn't it?

Barbara,
I owe you an apology.

I've been trying
to turn you into
something that you're not.

You're no gentle lady.

You're a warrior.

That's what attracted me.

That's what attracts me now.

(EXHALES)

Look, I...

Maybe I've burned
all my bridges,

but I'm constitutionally
incapable of retreat,

so I guess
I'll just go ahead.

(CHUCKLES)

It's...

It's difficult for me
to say this,

but I love you, Barbara.

I want you to be my wife.

(CHUCKLING) Well,
what the hell,
might as well try, huh?

Nothing to lose.

It's okay.

You don't have to
say anything.

Yes.

What?

I said, I accept, Maurice.

(STAMMERING) You do?

Yeah, but no
big announcement,
no splashy wedding.

We do it by the book or
we don't do it at all,
you got that?

Outstanding!

Well, aren't you
gonna kiss me?

(LAUGHS)

(SlGHlNG)
Well, I blame myself.

What?

I let her walk out that door.
'Cause I'm the Teflon kid.

Dozens of chicks,
nothing sticks.

Are you talking
about Maggie?

Mating for life, couples.

I always thought that was
for somebody else, Ed.

Not for me, you know.

(SIGHS)

Karma is rearing
its ugly head.

Oh, I don't know
about that, Chris.

(DOOR OPENS)
Hmm. The wheel of life.

MAGGIE: Hi, there.
RUTH-ANNE: How's it going?
Good to see you.

Round and round she goes.
Where she...

Hey.

Hi.

I couldn't go.
I just couldn't go.

You couldn't?

No.

I mean,

I was about to
get on the plane,
and I thought,

why am I doing this?
I mean...

Mmm-hmm?

What I'm trying to say is,
I'd rather be with you.

Hmm?

I mean, I'm not trying to
put any pressure on you
or anything.

(STAMMERING)
It's my decision.

You can put pressure on me.

I'm glad you came back.

You are?

Come here.

Do you wanna dance?

(GlGGLlNG)

Yeah.
Well, then, come on.

(OUR TOWN PLAYING)

(lNAUDlBLE)

(BARKING)