Nip/Tuck (2003–2010): Season 6, Episode 4 - Jenny Juggs - full transcript

Previously on Nip/Tuck...

you know how they say when

You find your Bliss is when the

Money starts rolling in?

Mine is so amazing, man. It

Takes us beyond our petty egos,

Beyond language and unifies us.

either pay your share of the

Rent by sundown or you can sleep

On the beach with all the other

Freaks.



[gasp]

daddy, my stomach! It hurts

So much!

it's an intestinal condition,

Resulting from the consumption

Of...Hair.

what?!

Annie, how did this happen?

I just pull it out. That's

All.

Dixie, is that you? Oh, you

Look fantastic as a brunette.

no, I'm Teddy. Teddy row.

I need you to stay still Mrs.



Reinhold.

[gagging]

we eloped 2 days ago.

is this a joke?

just spit it out. You don't

Like her? I don't care.

I just hope you didn't put

Any of your stuff in her name.

maybe it's better you weren't

There. Make sure she can't touch

Your money would have been a

Lousy toast. I am doubling my

Life insurance policy. I'm

Making Connor and Annie sole

Beneficiaries.

what if Annie stayed with us

For a couple of months? Heck,

Connor can come out too.

I have worked too hard to

Leave my family with nothing.

you're up early. It's almost

11:00.

do we have any coffee?

mm-hmm.

I saved you some of the paper.

It's the "help wanted" section.

About time you got a real job.

What's this?

it's $850 or as you and

Christian like to call it,

"rent." I have a real job.

That's 2 months in a row I've

Made now.

oh, wait a second. Did I hear

You say you're paying the rent

Without another threat of

Homelessness. Give me a look at

This stuff. Hmm. Smell likes

Real money. Looks like real

Money. What do you think?

of course it's real. And

Here. Here's a little extra.

Why don't you get some real

Coffee around here from now on?

This stuff sucks.

where'd you get all this

Money?

where do you think?

From practicing my craft.

craft? You mean miming

that's right?

I heard about you! The mime!

Robbing people.

[alarm bell ringing]

You don't scare me!

[gasp]

let me get this straight.

People actually pay to see you

Perform.

yeah. Mimes are back,

Christian in a big way. Thanks

To you two all the greats are

Being rediscovered--Marcel

Marceau, shields and yarnell.

I'm just carrying on the

Tradition.

well, you must be pretty good

If you're getting paid like

This.

I am. I make enough to pay my

Rent and support my child.

Please let me see her on

Saturday. I was going to take

Her to the Pier.

forget it dead beat dad.

You know, you are 5 months

Behind on your child support.

I'm working my fingers to the

Bone to pay for her childcare.

No. I'm sorry, I pay for

Everything. So, you consider

This your last visit until you

Pay up.

here. I'll pick her up at

9:00 a.M. You make sure she's

Ready. Am I clear?

where did you get this cash?

we should come see you

Perform.

that's a good idea. You just

Stand on the venice boardwalk,

Right?

you don't have to do that.

we're proud of you, Matt.

I mean it seems like you finally

Found something you really like

Doing.

and you're making money,

Which I'm very impressed with.

Even if you are a clown.

mimes aren't clowns.

I'm an artist.

mmm.

we just want to show our

Support. You know, we can come

Down, all get lunch together.

And make a day of it.

look, I don't want you to.

Ok? Look, you guys have never

Supported me. Not once. I don't

Need you to start now. I mean,

Really man. Isn't the money

Enough?

# ahh #

# make me beautiful #

# make me,

The perfect soul

A perfect mind,

A perfect face,

A perfect

Lie #

they've expired. It's a

Waste. We don't need this much

Lidocaine, all right. We should

Just cut back until things

Pick up.

we just cut back on the

Epinephrine and the atropine.

I don't want to risk not having

What we need in case of an

Emergency. What about the

Pre-filled syringes--

outdated. All of it, ok? It's

Money just thrown away. I mean,

Maybe with the rent going up on

The malibu house, we should just

Do surgeries there. We'd save a

Bundle.

you know, I should just tell

You. Teddy's place sold.

And we made an offer on a really

Great place we saw. Santa Monica

Adjacent.

well, that's great.

I mean, I'm fine. I'll be fine.

You know. I'm not gonna let rent

Get in the way of you moving on

With your life. I think it's

Great.

whoo. I gotta go.

so, when's Connor's flight

Get in?

uh, 11:10.

I can't wait for Teddy to meet

The little guy.

You know, she's really excited

About becoming a part of this

Whole new family.

I guess that doesn't include

Me because she doesn't give a

Shit about getting to know me.

you just have to give it a

Little time. You guys got off to

A rocky start. You didn't like

Her from the beginning.

You know Teddy is planning a

Little family brunch to welcome

Connor to l.A. Why don't you

Come?

you know, maybe later. She

Should--she should get to know

The kids first.

# got some bad news

This morning,

Which in turn made my day,

When this someone spoke...#

one more.

bad day, doc?

bad year.

don't mean to make it any

Worse. But, uh, you need to

Close out your tab. It's been a

Couple of months now. Boss has

Been on me about it.

when's the boss gonna get

Some new talent around here?

I mean, these old whores are

Getting tired.

couple of new girls on a

Break right now. One of 'em is

Kinda skinny. But the other

One...Right up your alley.

A huge talent. Juggernaut

Talent, truthfully.

what's her name?

Jenny. Jenny juggs.

well, why don't you run along

And tell Jenny juggs to brush

Her teeth and meet me in the

V.I.P. Room.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll pay the

Tab before I go.

are those real?

mmm.

ahh. No touching.

No touching. No, no.

You like my boobies?

yeah.

you do don't you.

'cause you're a very nasty

Little boy.

just a little feel? I mean,

I gotta see if those babies are

Real, huh? Huh?

did you hear me? This is not

The goddamn farmers market, you

Pervert. You can't go squeezing

The melons.

get the hell off me. This is

Bullshit. Freak. I'm not paying

For this.

I'm not a hooker. I'm a

Performer.

you got some delusions of

Grandma sister!

shh. I'm sorry. I'm very

Sorry. Ok? This is my first day.

I'm a little defensive. Ok? I'll

Be nice. I'm sorry. Ok?

I'll let you touch 'em. You want

To touch 'em?

you know what, sweetcheeks?

I'm over it. But my name's Dr.

Christian Troy. I'm a plastic

Surgeon. You should call me, all

Right. So I can do something

With these gravity bags.

They must be killing your back.

I deserved that. Ok.

I totally deserved that.

Just stay. Don't get me fired.

And I'll let you touch 'em. And

You'll like it a lot. You want

To do that? Yeah, touch 'em.

Yeah. Put your face right in the

Middle of them.

[mumbling]

how do you like them gravity

Bags, shitface?!

are you going to eat those

Eggs or make a sculpture of

Them?

I don't eat unborn chickens.

[dishes rattle]

this is an unfertilized

Globule of albumen and protein.

It comes out of the same opening

That a chicken poops out of.

Once the mother hen lays it, she

Promptly runs away with great

Relief. This egg is never going

To be a chicken. It is never

Going to feel pain. And it is

Never going to have a soul.

Now eat.

I'm not hungry.

perhaps mademoiselle McNamara

Would enjoy her eggs more if

There was a hunk of hair

Mixed in.

[door opens]

hello!

hey.

anybody home?

aww. This must be Connor.

he's a little shy with new

People.

maybe he just senses evil.

Annie, for god sake.

She been giving you a hard time?

she's a 13 year old. It's her

Job.

I wish I had your Patience.

well, you were never a

Teenage girl. Lucky me.

Connor, this is Teddy.

hey.

You're so handsome. Just like

Your dad.

wow. You sure have a way with

Him.

Annie, you want to drop the

Attitude for 5 minutes and try

To be a part of this family?

she's not my family.

she's right. I am the monster

Who dared have her sit and

Eat some eggs. Anytime I exert

Any authority over her she, uh,

Thinks I'm trying to take the

Place of her mom.

You know, I was thinking.

Maybe we could just start over.

You know, get to know each other

In a new environment where there

Aren't so many memories.

Go some place together.

you mean like a family

Vacation?

Sounds like fun.

You know, Connor's never been to

Disneyland.

disneyland blows. Disney

World's twice as good. Only half

As many people get hurt each

Year.

I'm with Annie on this one.

Disneyland does blow.

I was thinking more

Along the lines of something

Kind of...Adventurous. Like a

Camping trip.

camping? Like in the

Outdoors?

yeah. Like in the outdoors.

well, that sounds great. It'd

Be something new, wouldn't it?

I think it's a fantastic idea.

Shake things up a bit. Give us

All a chance to connect in a new

Way. Honey, give her a chance,

Ok? For me.

sounds to me you like you had

It coming.

when I go to a strip club,

I'm paying to objectify women.

That's the whole goddamn point.

It's the only place this side of

Bangkok where a man can actually

Act like a man. I'm not letting

Jenny juggs ruin our last man

Oasis.

still, you probably shouldn't

Have said what you said.

I should have said

Something much worse. The only

Reason that she's working there

Is so she can get rid of her

Angry feminist agenda bullshit.

She's a tit terrorist. She's

Valerie solanas with beach

Balls.

Valerie who?

famous man-hater who shot

Warhol.

I don't understand.

She punched you in the face with

Her breasts?

yes! She punched me in the

Face with her breasts. Ok? And

I'm not--

It's not funny.

I'm not the only one. There are

Other victims. You can come and

Take a look. I'm serious. It's

Not--come here, I'll show you.

Look.

you think you're so scary

Don't ya?

those things must weigh 50

Pounds.

mm-hmm.

glaring at us women, smiling.

she's talking to a pumpkin.

laughing. I said stop

Smiling! You want my tricks and

Treats? Well, I'm here to tell

You. I am no man's trick. Ahh!

And that is the only treat that

You deserve. A lesson in how to

Treat women.

you see? Those are deadly

Weapons.

what are you going to do?

I'm gonna have her arrested

For assault and battery.

She needs to be taught a lesson.

She needs to learn that crime

Doesn't pay.

you see, this is a great app.

You can alter photographs. See,

I look kind of sad here. So I

Swipe it. And I'm smiling.

[door slams]

that's cool.

I need to see Dr. Troy right

Away.

do you have an appointment?

no. But I need to talk to him

Today as soon as possible.

ok. Well, why don't you just

Take a seat. And what's your

Name?

Jennifer juggs. Ok? And I'm

Not leaving until I see him.

all right, well, she's gonna

Call the doctor. You go take a

Seat.

bughp.

I just have his voicemail--

Dr. Troy, I just barely made

Bail after spending the whole

Night in a freakin' cell! I just

Lost my freakin' job too!

ok--all right.

I just--

take a seat or I'll call

Security.

you obviously don't know who

You're talking to.

clearly a person with poor

People skills.

people skills?

Want to see some people skills?

are you the world's most

Self-destructive woman or what?

I know, ok? I know. I know.

I have rage issues. But that's

Why I'm here. I'll pay for your

Phone, Dr. Troy. I just need

Some help.

damn right you need some

Help. Dr. Epstein is just down

The hallway. He's a very well

Respected shrink. He deals with

You know body image issues.

it's so much bigger than

That. What color are my eyes?

I don't know.

they're blue! And they're

Really pretty!

But no one's ever gonna know

That. All they know is my juggs

Is gigantic.

If you ask anyone in my 10th

Grade class what they remember

About Jenny Jarvis--first,

They'll laugh uncomfortably.

And then they'll say her

Humungous tits.

And that's it.

'cause that's who I am.

And that's all I'll ever be.

I need you to give me a breast

Reduction.

[scoffs]

Why would you work at a strip

Club, huh? It's the one place

Where people actually pay to

Look at your breasts. It's a

Little counter-intuitive, don't

You think?

what else am I gonna do?

You gonna hire me to be your

Receptionist?

sweetheart after what you've

Done to my t-2 and my telephone,

I don't think I'm the right guy

To be asking.

I know that I seem a little

Bitter and angry. I need you to

Believe me that I have really

Tried to embrace myself. I've

Tried to do some standup comedy

And some performance art.

is that what you call those

Videos? Comedy and performance

Art? You are a sick, angry

Person. You need to be taught a

Lesson.

I thought you were a doctor,

And I thought that you would

Want to heal me instead of

Trying to punish me.

[exhales]

ok. Can I get a little help?

I've got mess kits, 4 sleeping

Bags, Coleman lamp, and other

Odds and ends.

Annie doesn't want to go.

I'll bring all this stuff

Back.

is it bugs? Her allergies?

well, I told her about the

Camper that she'd have her own

Bed. I made it sound like the 4

Seasons.

Sean, you're a great dad.

But you don't ask a 13 year old

To go on a trip, you tell her.

I know. I know. It's just

That I don't see her very often.

So, yeah. I indulge her more

Than I should.

Annie's never gonna respect

You if she knows she can

Manipulate you. You know, kids

Need limits. Do you want to be

Her father or her mark.

Why don't you do this?

How about you and

Christian, you go see Matt's

Mime thingy. And I will talk to

Her.

that could backfire.

She hasn't been able to accept

You. I mean, us.

We really should have had some

Kind of ceremony. I could have

Invited Annie and Connor and

Made them a part of it.

you terrible, horrible,

Horrible man you. Thinking of

Yourself for once. It'll be ok.

I promise I'll talk to her.

I love you, Mrs. Mcnamara.

Do you know that?

you want to walk back again?

Maybe he was on a break.

you kidding me. Go past all

These freaks again? The whole

Place smells like patchouli.

hey, excuse me. You normally

Work down here?

every day, bro.

is there a section where we

Might find a mime?

a mime?

a mime, you know, they do the

Whole "I'm in a box" thing. He's

Got dark hair. His name is Matt.

yeah. There's no mimes on

This boardwalk man. At least not

Anymore. I mean, there used to

Be a bunch, man. But now, like--

now what?

well, ever since that one

Started doing all those

Robberies, man. They all just

Sort of like, disappeared, you

Know.

what robberies?

some dude dressed as a mime

Has been jacking people at gun

Point. Happened like 5 times so

The cops started rounding up all

The mime's on the boardwalk for

Questioning recently. Now,

They're all gone.

since when?

a week. Which is great for

Me, man. Because more business!

hey, how much do you make in

A day?

on a good weekend like, uh, I

Don't know like 40, 50 bucks man

Easily.

40, 50 bucks.

yeah.

that's it?

dude, that's tax free, man.

how much did Matt give you

For the rent?

almost 900 bucks.

[knocking]

Annie? I'd like to talk to

You. Hey, there. I just wanted

To let you know that I

Understand what you're going

Through. You know, feeling

Betrayed, self conscious,

Certain that no one likes you.

I didn't say you could come

In.

I wasn't aware that I needed

Permission to enter and exit in

My own home.

fine. I'll go back to my

Mom's.

will you? See you're mom is

Just as worried about you as we

Are. That's why she sent you

Here. We all agree that you need

Help.

you're so full of it. I don't

Believe anything you say.

distrustful of others.

I forgot that one. I'm going to

Have to add it to the list.

what list?

the symptoms list on the

Admissions form.

Annie, you're not alone.

There are thousands

Of girls just like you. Hair

Eaters, skin cutters, self

Starving manic depressives.

They've all managed to get help

At places like discovery ranch.

No, really. Just google

"mentally disturbed teenage

Girls" you'll see. There are

More resident centers than motel

6s. We'll find the right one for

You.

my dad will never--

you daddy is not always going

To be around to protect you.

And you're not always going to

Be daddy's little girl. Here's a

Big secret, Annie. He's a man

Just like every other man. You

Can't count on him. In fact,

He's already pretty fed up with

You. For god's sake he had to

Pull a pound of hair out of your

Stomach. But it's up to you.

wait. What do I have to do?

[buzzer]

what do you think? Any of

These bozos look familiar to

You, Mrs. Park?

hmm. I don't know. They all

Look the same to me.

number 5 is 6'5". You don't

Remember if the mime who held

You up is 6'5"?

it happened very fast.

and he didn't say a word?

all he did was that mime

Shit.

[beep]

ok, gentleman, here's the

Drill. You're each going to step

Forward one at a time. Pretend

Your holding a gun to somebody's

Face. Number 1, you're first.

[beep]

no, that's not him.

[beep]

your turn number 2.

[beep]

that look like little Joe on

Bonanza.

[beep]

number 3.

[beep]

all right, all right, all

Right guys. Come on. Let's just

Keep this simple. Number 4, it's

Your turn.

[beep]

no. That's not him either.

And it's not the bald one. My

Mime had hair.

you sure he wasn't wearing a

Wig?

no. No. None of these guys

Are right. Round up some more

Mimes and give me a call.

[beep]

all right, fellas you can go

Home.

[beep]

when I was in

My teenage years,

I did just what I should

I listened to my mother

And I was kind and sweet

And good,

And my friends and I

Did rituals and I prayed

With all my might

That this would be the evening

That she'd stop

Along her flight,

The boob fairy

Never came for me,

That boob fairy

Never came for me #

this is bullshit! I can't

Believe you guys are accusing me

Of this! I'm your son.

which is why we know this

Kind of thing isn't out of

Character for you!

you've gone from a little

Shit to a piece of shit, Matt.

you know what, I don't need

To listen to this.

you sit!

I found this in your bedroom.

you're going through my stuff

Now, what is this malibu or

Moscow?

where'd you get the money,

Matt?!

from miming!

bullshit!

You get 20 bucks for walking

Against the wind?!

yeah. Sometimes. I'm good.

I told you. Or is that so hard

For you to believe?

we went down to venice and

You weren't there.

that's because I moved over

To the promenade. There are more

Europeans there, where the hell

Do you think I get all the 20s

From? It's like 2 bucks to them.

put yourself in our shoes.

There's over $3,000 here. From

Miming?!

you guys really think I did

It. My own fathers.

That's--

That's just great. Hold on.

"Albert chavies. Detective.

Pacific division." what is this?

well, he's the cop

Investigating the mime crimes.

He gave me his card after the

Line up yesterday.

you were in a line up?

yeah. And the eye witness

Cleared me as a suspect. You can

Call him if you want to. Oh, and

Congratulations by the way. You

Both are getting what you

Wanted. I'm moving out.

[door opens, closes]

all right, buddy. Here we go.

Now the trick here is to hold it

Just far enough away till it

Gets a little brown. But you

Don't want it to catch on fire.

the key to the 'smores is

Getting the perfect proportion

Between the, uh, chocolate bar

To Graham cracker.

think that's brown enough?

Me too. I think we're ready.

ok.

Ooh.

Here you go.

oh, look at that. Look how

Good that looks. Come here sit

Down.

I think yours is ready.

goody.

you know why they call it a

'smore, don't you?

It's because the 'smore you eat

The 'smore you want.

maybe they should call 'em

Barf bags.

well?

at least it keeps the bugs

Away.

all right, my turn.

ooh, let the professional

Handle this one.

don't shortchange me on the

Gooey stuff. Ok?

I won't.

There you go.

look at that. Look at that.

nice.

I'm gonna get some water.

can you fill the canteen for

Me, please?

I think she's

Warming up to me.

[toilet flushes]

what are you doing out of

Bed? You just had a huge

Surgery. Didn't somebody bring

You a bedpan?

she forgets to empty it.

well, that will not do.

I apologize. Get back into bed.

[beep]

Could somebody come in here

And clean out ms. Juggs' bedpan

Please.

ms. Juggs is dead. I have to

Get a new stage name.

Jenny joy. No need for all

That anger.

Now, we managed to take out more

Than I anticipated. So we took

You down to a "c". From a "g" to

A "c" if you can believe that.

I'm a little disoriented.

I just feel like something is

Missing.

uh-huh. Drainage is looking

Good. Linda's gonna show you how

To do that once you get home.

I gotta tell ya. In all the

Years that I've done this, I've

Never seen, let alone removed,

So much fat and tissue at one

Time. I should have called the

Shelter. We could have fed the

Homeless for weeks.

What?

they look like 2 mosquito

Bites.

sweetheart. A "c" is a nice

Handful. And you know what they

Say. Anything more than a

Handful is too hard to handle.

don't talk about my breasts

As if they're your playthings.

And don't ever call me

Sweetheart!

are you in pain? Hmm?

don't ever--

you need to get a handle on

That. Look, you just grab this

Little guy here and you press

The button.

press the button. Look at

You, Mr. Ain't-I-cool. Feeling

Like a bigshot 'cause you took

Away my mojo.

just cool your jets, all

Right. I'll get somebody in here

To clean out your bed pan.

no need for that.

can't do this to me. I'm in

Recovery. It's torture!

call amnesty international.

I'm pressing full charges

Against her.

I'm pressing full charges

Against you, you sexually

Harassing dickweed!

if I ever see you again, I'll

Cut off you arms and legs as

Well!

not before I cut your head

Off and shit down your neck!

I guess just because you take

A person's weapons away doesn't

Mean you take away their anger.

Hmm?

[faucet running]

hey baby.

hey.

so, the kids are passed out.

hmm.

I think nature does something

For insomnia.

this was a great idea of

Yours. One big happy family.

mm-hmm. This was a very good

Idea.

[engine running]

[opera music playing]

so this is where all that

Singing's coming from?

scared me.

sorry. Couldn't sleep and I

Heard the opera. So I figured

Why not come see who my cultured

Neighbor is. Teddy McNamara.

nice to meet you.

my husband and I are with the

Kids over at number 14. Just up

The road.

I'm Jerry. I'm sorry about

The music. I really thought I

Was the only one out here.

oh, gosh. No worries. I can't

Sleep in those campers anyway.

They're so cramped. My husband,

He's got the heat up full blast.

Kids are sawing logs. What about

You? You here with a wife or

Girlfriend?

me. No. No. I can't convince

Her to get the waders on.

fly fisherman.

yeah.

any luck today.

not much. But I think that's

About to change.

I hope so.

would you like some wine?

sure. I have some time.

in that case, you're really

Going to enjoy the show.

the show? What show?

[groaning]

so where are we going?

just a few more steps.

[owl hooting]

here we are.

where?

just wait a second. It's

About to begin.

dad. Dad. Connor's sick and I

Feel like I'm gonna throw up.

my head...

you feel it too?

can you just open a window?

I tried but they're all

Locked.

[opera music continues]

it's called the perseid

Meteor shower named after the

Perseus constellation.

oh.

happens every year about this

Time. But tonight is a very rare

Event.

Connor, hey. Come here, Bud.

Come here. We're gonna get out

Of here.

it's so transcending.

This is the best part.

You can feel it. It's like being

One with the cosmos. Like gods.

[coughing]

yes. Well, thank you for

Bringing me out here. I need to

Go.

ok. Come on. Let's go. Come

On, buddy. [coughing]

help! Help!

I hate the one's that scream.

ugh!

are you ok?

it feels worse.

help! Somebody help!

Sean!

you ok?

I don't understand what

Happened.

keep your brother awake.

Sean!

Sean! Sean!

[beeps]

my wife must have taken the

Keys when she went for a walk.

I'll get one of my guys to

Swing by and find her when she

Gets back from her walk. You

Know you're just lucky I heard

You screaming. Never get any

Cell reception out here.

yeah. Lucky.

[cash register beeps]

[bells jingle]

you're that mime bandit,

Right?

[beep]

Don't worry. They don't pay me

Enough to put up a fight.

It's kinda cool, actually.

Get me on the 6:00 news.

Maybe they send one of

Those hot ass reporters

Down and interview me.

You want Silver too?

can you mime dead?

oh, shit.

[knocking]

who is it?

christian?

what? You forget your

Invisible box?

What?

help me.

Jesus.