Nailed It! (2018–…): Season 7, Episode 4 - Slime Time - full transcript
[suspenseful music plays]
[cat snarls]
[scream]
It's Nailed It! Halloween...
[laughs]
...where the cakes start out as sweet dreams
but end up being the stuff of nightmares.
I'm Nicole Byer, the mistress
of this monstrous mayhem. [laughs]
-[man] Cut.
-What?
I'm doing good.
[man] You were. It was a lighting thing.
-We're gonna do it again.
-Who's in charge of...
I'm Nicole Byer. This season will be
full of tricks for Halloween
and some surprise visits
from some Netflix shows.
Today, three brave bakers
will recreate professional desserts
featuring the ooiest and the gooiest
of Halloween ingredients: slime.
At stake is the chance to win $10,000.
So, let's meet our...
Can we cool it?
Can we cool it with the slime?
It's really getting everywhere!
Wes! It's getting every... Hey! Wes!
I can't see my beautiful face. Wes!
My name is Phil Janiszewski,
and I'm a high school science teacher.
I got into baking
after years of loving to cook.
Definitely, I'm a novice still
when it comes to decorating.
I tried to make a cookie cake that looked
like a bowling pin for my son's birthday.
Looked like something
questionable instead, so not good.
My name is Helen Williams,
and I'm a retired nurse.
I'm here because of my grandkids.
We've been baking for years together,
and I'm here to make 'em proud of me.
Most of the time, you can eat what I make.
My name is Justin Bethel. I play
in the NFL for the New England Patriots.
I got into baking
when I was in high school.
You know, I'm used to competing
at a high level with a lot of eyes on me.
A couple of people
competing with me and some judges,
I don't really think
that's gonna falter me at all.
Happy Halloween, bakers. You scared yet?
-Terrified.
-We're getting there. [chuckles]
Justin, I heard you're in the NFL?
-That is true.
-Which team?
Uh, New England Patriots.
Oh, do you live...
[laughs]
...in New England?
[laughing]
No!
Oh no. They're definitely gonna use that.
[exhales]
Well, bakers, I have a Jacques-o'-lantern
that lights up my life every Halloween,
professional pastry chef
and chocolatier, Jacques Torres.
Bonjour, everyone, and good luck.
I cannot wait to see
what you're going to make.
Okay, bakers, look who oozed their way
onto the judges' chair today.
It is actress and comedian
Chelsea Peretti!
Say hello to the scared people, Chelsea.
-Hi, guys.
-Hi.
Hello. Welcome. And welcome
to myself, 'cause I'm not usually here.
[chuckling]
[upbeat music plays]
Okay, bakers.
For our Halloween Baker's Choice,
we've carved out the most ghastly task.
Don't strain your brain
when you make these...
slimy Halloween pumpkin heads!
[laughing] Oh my goodness.
Oh my God.
We've got grumpy pumpkin,
scaredy pumpkin, and happy pumpkin.
Those slimy pumpkins' heads
have a caramel popcorn center
to create the body
covered in orange fondant.
The eyeball and other facial details
are formed with modeling chocolate,
including the pumpkin lid, which lifts off
to expose
the caramel popcorn brain inside.
The slime coating on the brain
is a jalapeño jelly sauce.
Ooh, spicy.
[chuckles]
Hey, Helen, which slimy pumpkin head
do you want?
-I'm scared, but I'm gonna take Grumpy.
-Okay. Justin?
I'm gonna go with
the smiley buddy over there.
Phil, you're left with...
Scaredy.
Yeah. All right. Well,
get that caramel corn a-caramel-ling
'cause you got 45 minutes,
and it's starting now.
-Thank you.
-[Nicole] You're welcome.
-All right, let's do it.
-[laughing]
"Heat the oil over high heat.
Add a few kernels to the pot."
I think I'm gonna do the popcorn first.
I got this.
Okay, Jacques. How would you do this?
The first thing that they have to do
is pop the popcorn.
Then place the popcorn in the oven
on low heat to keep it warm.
Next, make the caramel
and the jalapeño slime.
Then form and cover
the popcorn ball with fondant.
And then, finally,
use fondant and modeling chocolate
to add the face
and all of the little details
to complete the pumpkin
that is the head of the caramel.
I had a bowl of jalapeño slime
for breakfast,
so this is very coincidental.
-I'm sorry.
-That sounds good.
I hear you popping, Helen.
I'm popping.
Oh, I hear it. It's happening.
I'm not the biggest fan of Halloween.
I ain't watching no scary movies.
I don't want to see nothing
about nothing jumping out at me.
[scream]
I'll be at home, chilling,
getting ready for Christmas.
Okay, so this goes in here.
It's attacking me.
-Ooh!
-[evil laughter]
On Halloween, my grandkids
and I have a Nailed It! baking challenge.
We all use the same recipe,
but I lose to a 10- and a 12-year-old.
That's embarrassing.
I don't want the kernels
to break their teeth.
Ooh! I'm popping!
In over my head as usual.
I got a grandma with years of experience.
I got a professional athlete, NFL player,
and then there's this chump teacher.
I hope that's enough popcorn.
This is the nature of the beast.
I'm here. I'm ready for it. Bring it on.
[Helen] Okay.
I need green coloring.
-Jacques, I have a question.
-Oui. Oui.
Two of the contestants put their popcorn
in the oven and one did not.
So, the issue that can be
is the popcorn is too cold,
the caramel seize
because it has something cold in it.
If the popcorn is warm,
then you have time to mix it.
Gotta warm up.
[evil laughter]
"Mix in the butter caramels
and color until both are melted."
"Mix in the butter caramels and color."
Oh, I need caramels.
How you doing, Phil?
I'm worried to touch the bottom
of the pot, that it'll get too hot.
So I don't know if I'm getting
an accurate reading.
Uh, yeah, that is trouble,
touching bottoms and getting too hot.
-Whoa.
-[Jacques laughs]
Phil, should be a space.
-Okay.
-[Jacques] Yeah.
So, I just stick this in here?
That's kind of...
Oh, there we go.
This is not...
This has to cook more.
You know what, Nicole?
I don't see Helen using a thermometer.
How is she going to know
when the caramel is ready?
What will happen if Helen
does not get the right temperature?
She can burn it or not cook it enough
to let the sugar thicken and caramelize.
Bad. Bad, bad, bad.
-Did you get your thing to 250 yet?
-No, I'm scared it's gonna burn though.
[Phil] I feel like I'm gonna look away
and it's gonna be bad.
So, Phil has been taking
his thermometer in and out of his pot,
which is gonna give him a false reading.
[Jacques] And if he goes over 250,
it's going to be too sticky
and make the popcorn crunchy.
All right.
"Make the slime."
Jalapeño pepper jelly. Whole jar of this.
I've got the sugar and green coloring.
[Phil] Okay, jelly.
I've got some of this at home.
I use it when I make charcuterie boards.
Yes, charcuterie. I'm kind of fluent
in the jam jalapeño space.
This is my slime. This goes over this.
Helen, are you married?
Yes. This real hunky police officer
moved onto my route.
Mm.
When I found out he was single,
I knocked on his door,
and I said, "Hey, good-looking,
got any stamps that need lickin'?"
-Ah!
-[Jacques laughs]
Helen!
Together 30 years.
-[Nicole] Thirty years?
-That's a lot of stamps!
-[Jacques laughs]
-It's a lot of stamps, girl.
[evil laughter]
I feel like this is gonna fall apart
the minute that wet goop
goes right into this.
[Justin] It's about the right size.
Justin's popcorn ball looks pretty dense.
The strong football arm's mashing it.
I think it's because he's used
to handling balls.
Granted, that's not
shaped like a football.
[whistle blows]
I don't want to snitch,
but Phil put chocolate chips in his thing,
and it's not in the recipe in his popcorn.
I think that using chocolate
should be always allowed.
-What do you think?
-Thank you.
Always, anywhere.
I mean, I obviously think
chocolate should be allowed everywhere.
There was a time in our country where
chocolate was not allowed in some places.
-Really?
-Yes, it was separate.
They claimed it was equal, but it was not.
Oh, now you get it.
I'm dumb. I'm very dumb.
Thanks for having me.
It's not making a bowl.
It is not sticking.
You know what? I'm just gonna do this.
I don't know what Helen is doing,
but it looked like a dumpling.
[chuckles]
Oh, my poor, sad, little pumpkin man.
[sad trumpet plays]
Sixteen minutes remain!
It's gonna be freakin' terrible.
All right, I got modeling chocolate.
Need a nose.
Trying to make some eyeballs.
How do you stick fondant on fondant?
Try a little bit of...
Does fondant stick on water?
I am, um, just at this point,
trying to give them something.
I'm not sure what it'll be.
Helen, you're from Long Island.
Do you ever spend time in Jersey?
Why? Why would I?
-[Jacques laughs] "Why would I?"
-I'm from Jersey!
Jersey's a beautiful state.
I know. I absolutely get it.
Trash. Trash across the board.
If you hold your nose
the whole way through, you're good.
[laughing]
[Justin] Oh. Oh.
Oh, I got a lot to go
and a little time to do it.
I gotta get some kind of mouth
on my pumpkin,
so it's time for an audible.
[whistle blows]
Oh, we're going with the bootleg smile.
You know what I remember seeing
in the pantry? Some lips.
Give me the lips.
That's the way to go.
I feel like a plastic surgeon
about to get my patient right.
One minute remains!
[Phil] All right. Teeth.
Oh.
Oh, my God. What am I missing?
Oh, my cat.
[Phil] Oh my gosh.
[Helen] Lid. Oh.
He's got a face.
-Five, four, three, two, one.
-You're done!
-[Justin] Oh, man, that's horrible.
-Ah!
At least I think mine'll taste good.
Oh, hi, hello, Helen. You were supposed
to make a grumpy, slimy, pumpkin head.
Let's see what you made.
[Helen] Nailed it.
-[laughs]
-You know...
[Chelsea] He's wearing
a little church hat.
[Nicole] It is very funny to me
because it has a mustache.
-In honor of...
-Jacques does not have a mustache.
No, no, no. He's French. He's French.
Oh, he's French.
Oh, he looks kind of French. The beret,
the mustache. Oui, oui, pumpkin.
All right, Jacques, why don't you serve
us up some of that grumpy pumpkin head?
Hmm.
[laughing]
That's...
That's a texture
I don't think I've ever had.
-Sticky.
-I don't taste jalapeño.
I taste sweetness.
I know it's popcorn
'cause it's shaped like it.
It reminds me of chewing paper
in elementary school
to make little spitballs.
What I don't taste is the caramel.
If you don't use a thermometer
to cook the sugar,
you stop the sugar
before the stage of caramel.
-That's what, uh, we missed there.
-Okay.
All right, Helen, I bid you adieu.
-Thank you.
-Merci.
Whoo! Whoo, whoo!
Phil!
Okay, so this is
the scaredy-slamming pumpkin head
you were trying to make. Let's see
the pumpkin head you made, Phil.
[Phil] Nailed it.
Oh, boy. [laughs]
Okay, we got
some candy corn thrown up in there.
-I think that's a spider on top.
-[Phil] Yes.
What's the white stuff all over his face?
Those are also teeth.
Oh, he has a tooth medley.
I didn't understand the whole geography.
Now I'm caught up. Thank you so much.
-[Phil] I appreciate it.
-[Nicole] Let's taste it.
-[Jacques] Cutting.
-[Jacques and Nicole] Oh.
-Okay.
-[Jacques] We have more caramel here.
[Nicole] Oh no.
I just had dental work,
and I hope you do not reverse it.
[Nicole] All right, let's do this. Oh boy.
[Chelsea laughs]
Judging by your facial expressions,
I feel like it's not going super well.
So, it's like, goopy?
Crunchy? Other stuff.
You have the caramel.
My guess is we went a little bit over 250,
so when you bite, you know,
it's a bit sticky and crunchy.
[Chelsea]
I've never eaten anything like it,
and I probably will stick to the foods
I normally eat going forward.
Why the chocolates in there?
I just thought it would be
just something a little extra.
And we love surprise, no?
-I love a surprise. Absolutely.
-Yeah, why not?
On that note, goodbye, Phil.
-Bye, Phil.
-Good luck on your journey.
Justin!
Let's see the happy, slimy pumpkin head
you were trying to make,
and let's see pumpkin head you made.
[Justin] Nailed it.
[laughing]
This is an Instagram moment.
[laughing]
[kissing noise]
[Nicole] This is so funny.
[laughing]
[Nicole] You got them big lips.
She's missing some lashes.
We got some hair.
She didn't get the full weave.
This is the smoothest pumpkin we've seen.
There's a good heft to it.
I don't know if I can accept the cat,
that little ball.
[cat snarls]
[laughing]
-Jacques, cut that pumpkin.
-[Jacques] Let's do it.
[Nicole] Uh-oh.
-[Chelsea] Right through the eyeball.
-[Nicole] Wow. Yeah.
-Jacques the Ripper.
-[Jacques] Jacques the Ripper!
Can I have those lips? Thank you.
[Chelsea] Mm.
[Chelsea laughs]
[Nicole] Look at Chelsea! She getting in!
Oh my God. It's very, very dense.
I was gnawing on it like that rat.
[judges laughing]
I think you don't feel your strength.
You just, you know...
But I feel the jalapeño.
Same.
It's actually... You cook it the right way.
You know, you did good.
[laughs]
Okay, let's sit.
[laughing]
Jacques, which baker served us
the tastiest,
slimiest pumpkin brains ever?
Nicole, one baker really delivered
on the slimy goods,
and that baker is...
Justin.
[Phil] Hey!
Yeah. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Chelsea, tell Justin what he's won.
Nicole, the popcorn party
is gonna keep on popping
when you take home
this popcorn prize package.
[Nicole] Wow.
[Jacques] Wow. Popcorn.
[Nicole] You also get
the amazing Nailed It! golden baker's cap.
Bakers, really great work,
but time to move on.
Yes, that's a fabulous idea.
Let's move to door number two.
[upbeat music plays]
♪ Oh, oh ♪
Listen up as Chelsea spills her guts.
Bakers, what I'm about to share
must remain within these
three or four, maybe six walls.
You've been given clearance for a project
of the highest level of national security.
Your stomachs may turn when you make this...
[mysterious music plays]
-[laughs]
-[Nicole] Alien autopsy cake!
[Justin] Oh man.
He's a sweet, cake treat.
And not only that...
[Helen] Oh no.
[Nicole] When you cut him open,
you'll find slimy alien gut ooze.
Look at that.
Ugh.
This oozing alien autopsy cake
is carved coconut cake
wrapped in fondant.
The eyes, teeth, and all the details
are made of modeling chocolate,
and the skin is airbrushed
with edible paint.
The inside of the alien ooze
has a slimy curd.
-Don't you love the word "curd"?
-Sure.
If you think you are going
to have a panic, I'm here.
Hit your panic button, and I will fly over
to you and help you for three minutes.
There's $10,000 on the line,
and 90 minutes of your time
is what it's going to take to do that.
And it started.
[horror music plays]
[action music plays]
This is so good.
[thunder rumbles]
Okay, this gotta come off
for one second so I can concentrate.
Stage one, I conquered you
just like I thought I would.
Stage two, beware.
Coconut. Okay.
[Phil] Get in that pantry.
Okay.
Jacques, how would you make
this alien autopsy cake?
-Nicole, I love this cake.
-Oh.
[Jacques] First, they need to mix
their cake batter
using coconut milk as flavoring.
Then make their buttercream
and gooey lime curd
and form the arms and legs
using rice cereal treats.
Next, assemble and cover with fondant,
taking care to line the belly
with chocolate before adding the curd.
And then, finally,
they should decorate their oozing alien
for a cake that is
truly out of this world.
I am going to try to get my cake
in the oven. How do you get this thing on?
I'm gonna calm down a little,
pay more attention to the directions.
You mix them separately.
My grandsons told me that.
But it's the old lady
and the two stud muffins.
It's not gonna go well.
Two cups of coconut milk.
It's supposed to look like that?
Ooh, I wonder...
That should be about two cups
when it melts, I guess, right?
Let's get the right height on these cakes.
I don't want my cakes too thin.
Okay.
Oh, this is thick.
[Justin] So I make my batter.
I was planning on going in to the pantry,
getting one of those square ones,
but I was like, "Maybe I can save
some time if I just grab this sheet pan."
Um, uh,
I haven't made a cake in a while, but...
-Ugh.
-This is gonna have to do.
-Okay.
-First in.
Helen, how you doing?
I think I'm doing better
than the first round.
Oh, this thing fell in the...
-What's going on?
-Thermometer fell in my cake.
-[Jacques] She tried to poison us.
-Did you get it out?
-[Helen] I did, yes.
-I don't want mercury poisoning.
But I do.
[laughing]
And this glove.
We don't want to eat that either.
Okay.
Next thing is make lime curd.
[Phil] My first time ever lime curd.
"Mix sugar, eggs,
and whisk the lime juice."
I have no idea what lime curd is,
but I'm confident I can follow
the recipe and make it taste good.
Okay.
Okay.
[clattering]
-[Phil] You okay, Helen?
-I'm okay.
All right.
My paper's catching fire.
I got that going for us.
My, uh, green stuff is thickening.
I don't think mine is going to thicken,
but I'm hoping it comes out okay.
Oh, yeah. I think that's what I want.
Does that look like alien guts or what?
[Nicole] Whoo! One hour left, bakers!
Oh, that escalated quickly.
[groans]
I should always read ahead.
When's nap time?
Helen.
We don't get a nap?
I'd like to phone a friend.
Can I buy a vowel, anything?
Okay.
[Justin]
Oh, that's not good at all. Oh, no!
My batter is overflowing and a lot jiggly.
Is something burning?
Yes, something's been burnt.
-[Chelsea] Burning bad!
-[Justin] I was giving the stove a taste.
I might've overfilled it a little bit.
I'm not really sure
what's going on in there...
I need help.
[screams]
It's a panic!
[screaming]
[Jacques] What's happening?
Did you overfill it?
Wow, look at that smoke, man. Ugh!
-[Nicole] Uh, did Justin burn something?
-No. I'm adding a smoky hint flavor.
He's burning the oven.
That's what's going on. [laughs]
[Nicole] You burned the oven?
And it smells bad.
-It does smell really bad.
-Mm-hmm.
[Jacques] That's not cooked. You
don't even have to do it. Forget about it.
-[Justin] It was...
-It's not cooked.
Your batter is too thick.
Give it another few minutes. Close it.
Okay. I just wanted to make sure.
I wanna be smelling
a warm vanilla-cake smell.
Sorry. You came to the wrong show.
That's fine. It's almost there.
-Okay, let that go a little bit more.
-Okay.
-You want it light and nice.
-Jacques, you're done.
-Okay, I'm done.
-Thank you very much.
Good luck.
Okay. I'm right where I want to be.
Trying to toast a little coconut
to put in the buttercream.
[Phil] I need something that's gonna
step up this cake a little bit.
Toasted coconut.
Hopefully, that's gonna give it
that extra something.
I like a little texture in my in between.
[laughs]
[Justin] This cake might be done.
I feel like this could go in there
like this because it's soft.
She had solid stick of butter
on the bottom of that bowl.
You got to melt it a bit, yeah?
Is this too full to put in there?
Oh no, Helen's having a rough time
with that buttercream.
Helen, how you doing
with that buttercream?
I'm doing great.
Just kidding. She's doing great.
[machine creaking]
-[Nicole] Oh, that sounds good.
-[judges laugh]
-That is a very interesting sound.
-[laughing]
That mixer has punched in. It is working.
[Jacques] It's too much stuff
in the mixer. The mixer can't turn.
-Did I do that?
-[Nicole] Ew. Ew. Ew.
I don't know what I did wrong there.
How are you doing with the arms, Helen?
-Haven't started them yet.
-I thought it'd be like Play-Doh.
[Phil] This alien cake is definitely
in the science world.
Unfortunately, I'm a physical science guy.
The fingers and arms and legs,
that's the biology world.
I feel like I need glue or something.
Thirty minutes!
[Justin] Every time I try to press
more crispy on, the other stuff falls off.
With the fingers, I end up
having to make an audible.
I get some black molding chocolate,
start rolling out little sausages
and sticking them on there.
Right where I want to be.
This is not at all sticking.
No!
Ugh. Bite me.
You said this show was fun.
You lied to me.
Ugh.
Helen, how's it going?
Great.
[laughing]
[Helen] That's only one? Oh God.
-Justin.
-What's up?
-Can you teach me how to tackle?
-Sure.
Ooh, really? Who should I tackle?
A camera operator?
-Wes.
-[laughing]
Wes, can I tackle you?
Okay, teach me how to tackle.
[Jacques laughs]
[Nicole] Okay, Justin.
So it's all about keeping your head up.
Same with your head.
-Keeping my head up.
-[Jacques] Nicole, be careful.
-[Nicole] Keep your head up, Wes.
-Bend over at the waist a bit.
There you go.
[laughing]
[Chelsea] Wes, watch out.
You're in danger!
Now go in for the tackle.
-[Nicole] I just go in and knock him over?
-Yes, pretty much.
[Nicole] All right.
-[Chelsea] Oh my God! Wow!
-[laughs]
-That was impressive, Nicole.
-Thank you.
Wow, the headphones came flying.
There's no way
that's not a slo-mo moment.
[Chelsea] Oh my God!
[in slow motion] Oh my God!
[laughs]
Eight minutes remain!
I'm in trouble.
All right, buttercream in.
[Jacques]
Look how thick is the buttercream.
-Is that bad? Oh, yeah.
-Look. Look like plaster.
[Justin] Y'all about to taste some paper.
I'm gonna cut it open,
and then put it in there.
[Phil] And then I gotta harden the belly.
[Helen] Ugh.
[Jacques] Helen's putting
molding fondant to insulate the...
[Nicole] Oh!
Well, that's something, right?
It doesn't work.
They need to put chocolates
in the cavity so, like, the curd
doesn't seep to the cake.
So, chocolate is waterproof?
-Chocolate is pretty much waterproof.
-All right.
I have a chocolate swimsuit.
[chuckles]
[alien growl]
[Phil] This is a different breed of alien.
My alien is, uh...
Incomplete? [chuckles]
And he's been so confident,
but the cracks are starting to show.
[Justin] This is a lot bluer
than I thought it was gonna be.
I messed this all the way up.
-[Helen] Ooh. Ooh. Don't break.
-Stick it right there.
Boy, this hair's heavy.
This is a nightmare.
A nightmare. Perfect for Halloween.
One minute remains! [laughs]
My hair's literally falling off.
Yeah, let's do eyeballs.
[Helen] Oh, the mouth.
Eyes.
[Phil laughs]
Man, don't got no legs.
It's time for an audible.
It's not looking good.
I looked over
and saw Phil did the same thing.
I was like, "Okay, I'm not the only one."
Ooh! Twenty-five seconds!
I'm gonna need a vacation after this.
[Phil] He's got a hat.
That did not go as planned.
Whatever. This is what y'all getting.
Five, four, three, two, one!
-You're done! And so is my wig.
-[alarm blares]
Can I please get this [beep] fixed?
All right, Helen, this is
the oozing alien autopsy cake
you were trying to make,
and let's see what you made.
Nailed it!
-Ooh, Helen.
-[laughing]
[Nicole] I like him.
I like that your alien's
wearing sunglasses?
I don't know if I can say
what the mouth looks like.
It looks exactly like that one.
[Jacques laughs]
Um, I like the idea
that there's cake in there.
It's the insides that matter to me,
because I have depth.
[chuckles]
Oh, good.
[Nicole] All right, Helen.
Cut that cake!
Let's see that ooze, Helen.
Oh, where the ooze at?
-Oh, there the ooze. Uh.
-[Chelsea] Uh.
-[Nicole] Yeah. Ooh, okay. Yes!
-Money shot!
-[Nicole] That's a little bit of ooze.
-[Helen] It's in there.
She didn't put any chocolates
on the bottom.
You put some rolling fondant.
The cake absorbed all the slime.
[Helen] Oh, sorry.
-I love you.
-[Nicole] Aw.
[Jacques] Yeah, sorry. Sorry, alien.
-You must be an incredible grandmother.
-I wish she were my grandma.
-[laughs]
-Oh, Helen. Roll on back there.
All right, Phil, let's see what you did.
Nailed it!
[laughing]
[Nicole] Boy, oh boy, are those legs tiny.
[Phil] I was having trouble
with the cereal treat.
-Did you have a clear view of that guy?
-[Jacques laughs]
It didn't seem to matter.
[laughing]
Phil, let's see it ooze.
[Phil] My pleasure.
Nice, happy cut.
[judges] Oh!
-Okay. All right. Oh yeah.
-Okay!
-[Jacques] Okay, oozing, okay.
-[Nicole] Yeah!
That's the oozone layer.
I can't believe...
-[mockingly murmurs]
-[laughing]
-[Nicole] Boy, oh boy.
-[Chelsea] Wow.
-[Nicole] Just the slow goops.
-[Chelsea] Oh gosh.
Well, Phil, we have another cake to see,
so I'm gonna ask you
to return to your station.
[Justin] Okay.
Okay, Justin, let's see what you made.
Nailed it!
[laughing]
This is the most haunted-looking thing
I've ever seen.
[Jacques] Oh my God.
[Nicole] Just the color you chose.
Those lips and those eyes.
-Are they upside down, the lips?
-Yeah, they are! The lips are upside down.
[Nicole]
Oh my God. This is incredible, Justin.
You gotta cut him.
-[Justin] Let's do this.
-He has no face.
[laughing]
[Nicole] The consistency, Justin!
Chelsea's crying.
There's something about
it oozing out of his happy face.
There you go.
[laughing]
-Very dramatic.
-[Nicole] There you go.
[Jacques]
Thank you, Justin. That was precious.
-Well...
-Bye.
[laughing]
[Nicole] All right, bakers, cut up
your best slice of these alien cakes.
Jacques, come on.
Chelsea, come on.
I feel I still got a chance.
I'm hoping that the flavor
wins me the championship.
You know, I'm not too far off,
if you squint really hard.
Helen, you're up first.
Let's jam on this cake.
What?
[laughing]
Your frosting is so thick.
But I don't mind. She a little thick,
so I identify with it. I like it.
So, the curd has the lime flavor,
and that help with the flavor
of the cake and the buttercream.
I mean, look, if you just
soften the butter into the mixer,
then it will be a lot lighter.
-Chelsea?
-Delicious. No, um...
[laughing]
Coming in hot, Chelsea.
[Chelsea] Helen, Helen.
Listen. It's just, like,
literally heavy, but it tastes good.
Thank you.
Okay, Phil.
Ready.
[Chelsea] Okay.
Hmm.
[laughing]
[Phil] It's not good.
[chuckles]
Nothing's dry.
That's pleasing to my taste buds.
Uh, I like the lime. Did you put
anything else into the cake?
Yes, sir. In the buttercream.
I tried to toast some coconut.
You toasted it yourself?
-Yeah. In the oven right behind me.
-[Nicole] Self toasting? Oh.
Yeah. Usually,
you know, the buttercream has moisture
and that the flake's going
to get back that moisture.
It's a step
that you don't have to take to toast it.
The first bite was
kind of gummy, I thought.
And I had another bite.
I go, "Maybe it's not."
I don't know. I'm losing
sort of my grip on reality. [laughs]
-I get it.
-Okay.
Justin. 'Tis time.
Oh man. Okay, here we go.
[chuckling]
The consistency of everything is off.
[laughs]
This is the wettest cake I've ever had.
Moist?
-No, not... It's wet.
-[Justin] Oh.
Oh darn.
It's just a little bit under. That's why.
And it's a bit heavy too. Uh...
That's nuts.
I don't know, like, how to put this
in football terms. A fumble?
Oh, that's not good.
The three of you are really nice people.
-And you love your families.
-[Nicole] Yeah.
And we're gonna have to pick a winner,
which seems inconceivable.
[laughing]
And somebody's gonna win money!
-[thunder rumbles]
-[scary music plays]
Whoever wins this challenge
walks away with $10,000
and the Nailed It! Halloween trophy.
[electronic music plays]
-Whoa! Wow!
-[judges laughing]
Oh! Wow! [screams]
[laughing]
Smile.
[laughing]
Okay, Chelsea, are you ready
to splash the cash?
Do I look ready?
[laughing]
Let's send this sucker
back where it came from.
-What? Is it too soon?
-Not yet!
[laughing]
Boy, that really got me good.
Uh, whoops.
Okay, Jacques?
Bakers, I have to say
that two of the cakes was pretty good,
but only one baker had a complete alien.
So, the winner is...
Helen.
-Helen! Yes! Yay!
-Yeah!
[Nicole] Oh, Helen.
Nana's bringing home the trophy.
[applause]
This means the world to me.
I really wanted to make
my grandkids proud.
I did it, babies. I did it.
You got a speech? Look at the camera
and give your speech.
I nailed it! Oh my God.
I'm gonna sleep with this.
[judges laughing]
Okay, I'm gonna take a picture.
Stay there! I'm gonna take a picture.
[Chelsea] Oh my goodness.
[scream]
That's it for this Nailed it! Halloween.
Slime you later!
[chuckles] Ho, ho, ho!
Happy Halloween!
[evil laughter]
Boy, this is like a fever dream sometimes.
[upbeat music plays]
[cat snarls]
[scream]
It's Nailed It! Halloween...
[laughs]
...where the cakes start out as sweet dreams
but end up being the stuff of nightmares.
I'm Nicole Byer, the mistress
of this monstrous mayhem. [laughs]
-[man] Cut.
-What?
I'm doing good.
[man] You were. It was a lighting thing.
-We're gonna do it again.
-Who's in charge of...
I'm Nicole Byer. This season will be
full of tricks for Halloween
and some surprise visits
from some Netflix shows.
Today, three brave bakers
will recreate professional desserts
featuring the ooiest and the gooiest
of Halloween ingredients: slime.
At stake is the chance to win $10,000.
So, let's meet our...
Can we cool it?
Can we cool it with the slime?
It's really getting everywhere!
Wes! It's getting every... Hey! Wes!
I can't see my beautiful face. Wes!
My name is Phil Janiszewski,
and I'm a high school science teacher.
I got into baking
after years of loving to cook.
Definitely, I'm a novice still
when it comes to decorating.
I tried to make a cookie cake that looked
like a bowling pin for my son's birthday.
Looked like something
questionable instead, so not good.
My name is Helen Williams,
and I'm a retired nurse.
I'm here because of my grandkids.
We've been baking for years together,
and I'm here to make 'em proud of me.
Most of the time, you can eat what I make.
My name is Justin Bethel. I play
in the NFL for the New England Patriots.
I got into baking
when I was in high school.
You know, I'm used to competing
at a high level with a lot of eyes on me.
A couple of people
competing with me and some judges,
I don't really think
that's gonna falter me at all.
Happy Halloween, bakers. You scared yet?
-Terrified.
-We're getting there. [chuckles]
Justin, I heard you're in the NFL?
-That is true.
-Which team?
Uh, New England Patriots.
Oh, do you live...
[laughs]
...in New England?
[laughing]
No!
Oh no. They're definitely gonna use that.
[exhales]
Well, bakers, I have a Jacques-o'-lantern
that lights up my life every Halloween,
professional pastry chef
and chocolatier, Jacques Torres.
Bonjour, everyone, and good luck.
I cannot wait to see
what you're going to make.
Okay, bakers, look who oozed their way
onto the judges' chair today.
It is actress and comedian
Chelsea Peretti!
Say hello to the scared people, Chelsea.
-Hi, guys.
-Hi.
Hello. Welcome. And welcome
to myself, 'cause I'm not usually here.
[chuckling]
[upbeat music plays]
Okay, bakers.
For our Halloween Baker's Choice,
we've carved out the most ghastly task.
Don't strain your brain
when you make these...
slimy Halloween pumpkin heads!
[laughing] Oh my goodness.
Oh my God.
We've got grumpy pumpkin,
scaredy pumpkin, and happy pumpkin.
Those slimy pumpkins' heads
have a caramel popcorn center
to create the body
covered in orange fondant.
The eyeball and other facial details
are formed with modeling chocolate,
including the pumpkin lid, which lifts off
to expose
the caramel popcorn brain inside.
The slime coating on the brain
is a jalapeño jelly sauce.
Ooh, spicy.
[chuckles]
Hey, Helen, which slimy pumpkin head
do you want?
-I'm scared, but I'm gonna take Grumpy.
-Okay. Justin?
I'm gonna go with
the smiley buddy over there.
Phil, you're left with...
Scaredy.
Yeah. All right. Well,
get that caramel corn a-caramel-ling
'cause you got 45 minutes,
and it's starting now.
-Thank you.
-[Nicole] You're welcome.
-All right, let's do it.
-[laughing]
"Heat the oil over high heat.
Add a few kernels to the pot."
I think I'm gonna do the popcorn first.
I got this.
Okay, Jacques. How would you do this?
The first thing that they have to do
is pop the popcorn.
Then place the popcorn in the oven
on low heat to keep it warm.
Next, make the caramel
and the jalapeño slime.
Then form and cover
the popcorn ball with fondant.
And then, finally,
use fondant and modeling chocolate
to add the face
and all of the little details
to complete the pumpkin
that is the head of the caramel.
I had a bowl of jalapeño slime
for breakfast,
so this is very coincidental.
-I'm sorry.
-That sounds good.
I hear you popping, Helen.
I'm popping.
Oh, I hear it. It's happening.
I'm not the biggest fan of Halloween.
I ain't watching no scary movies.
I don't want to see nothing
about nothing jumping out at me.
[scream]
I'll be at home, chilling,
getting ready for Christmas.
Okay, so this goes in here.
It's attacking me.
-Ooh!
-[evil laughter]
On Halloween, my grandkids
and I have a Nailed It! baking challenge.
We all use the same recipe,
but I lose to a 10- and a 12-year-old.
That's embarrassing.
I don't want the kernels
to break their teeth.
Ooh! I'm popping!
In over my head as usual.
I got a grandma with years of experience.
I got a professional athlete, NFL player,
and then there's this chump teacher.
I hope that's enough popcorn.
This is the nature of the beast.
I'm here. I'm ready for it. Bring it on.
[Helen] Okay.
I need green coloring.
-Jacques, I have a question.
-Oui. Oui.
Two of the contestants put their popcorn
in the oven and one did not.
So, the issue that can be
is the popcorn is too cold,
the caramel seize
because it has something cold in it.
If the popcorn is warm,
then you have time to mix it.
Gotta warm up.
[evil laughter]
"Mix in the butter caramels
and color until both are melted."
"Mix in the butter caramels and color."
Oh, I need caramels.
How you doing, Phil?
I'm worried to touch the bottom
of the pot, that it'll get too hot.
So I don't know if I'm getting
an accurate reading.
Uh, yeah, that is trouble,
touching bottoms and getting too hot.
-Whoa.
-[Jacques laughs]
Phil, should be a space.
-Okay.
-[Jacques] Yeah.
So, I just stick this in here?
That's kind of...
Oh, there we go.
This is not...
This has to cook more.
You know what, Nicole?
I don't see Helen using a thermometer.
How is she going to know
when the caramel is ready?
What will happen if Helen
does not get the right temperature?
She can burn it or not cook it enough
to let the sugar thicken and caramelize.
Bad. Bad, bad, bad.
-Did you get your thing to 250 yet?
-No, I'm scared it's gonna burn though.
[Phil] I feel like I'm gonna look away
and it's gonna be bad.
So, Phil has been taking
his thermometer in and out of his pot,
which is gonna give him a false reading.
[Jacques] And if he goes over 250,
it's going to be too sticky
and make the popcorn crunchy.
All right.
"Make the slime."
Jalapeño pepper jelly. Whole jar of this.
I've got the sugar and green coloring.
[Phil] Okay, jelly.
I've got some of this at home.
I use it when I make charcuterie boards.
Yes, charcuterie. I'm kind of fluent
in the jam jalapeño space.
This is my slime. This goes over this.
Helen, are you married?
Yes. This real hunky police officer
moved onto my route.
Mm.
When I found out he was single,
I knocked on his door,
and I said, "Hey, good-looking,
got any stamps that need lickin'?"
-Ah!
-[Jacques laughs]
Helen!
Together 30 years.
-[Nicole] Thirty years?
-That's a lot of stamps!
-[Jacques laughs]
-It's a lot of stamps, girl.
[evil laughter]
I feel like this is gonna fall apart
the minute that wet goop
goes right into this.
[Justin] It's about the right size.
Justin's popcorn ball looks pretty dense.
The strong football arm's mashing it.
I think it's because he's used
to handling balls.
Granted, that's not
shaped like a football.
[whistle blows]
I don't want to snitch,
but Phil put chocolate chips in his thing,
and it's not in the recipe in his popcorn.
I think that using chocolate
should be always allowed.
-What do you think?
-Thank you.
Always, anywhere.
I mean, I obviously think
chocolate should be allowed everywhere.
There was a time in our country where
chocolate was not allowed in some places.
-Really?
-Yes, it was separate.
They claimed it was equal, but it was not.
Oh, now you get it.
I'm dumb. I'm very dumb.
Thanks for having me.
It's not making a bowl.
It is not sticking.
You know what? I'm just gonna do this.
I don't know what Helen is doing,
but it looked like a dumpling.
[chuckles]
Oh, my poor, sad, little pumpkin man.
[sad trumpet plays]
Sixteen minutes remain!
It's gonna be freakin' terrible.
All right, I got modeling chocolate.
Need a nose.
Trying to make some eyeballs.
How do you stick fondant on fondant?
Try a little bit of...
Does fondant stick on water?
I am, um, just at this point,
trying to give them something.
I'm not sure what it'll be.
Helen, you're from Long Island.
Do you ever spend time in Jersey?
Why? Why would I?
-[Jacques laughs] "Why would I?"
-I'm from Jersey!
Jersey's a beautiful state.
I know. I absolutely get it.
Trash. Trash across the board.
If you hold your nose
the whole way through, you're good.
[laughing]
[Justin] Oh. Oh.
Oh, I got a lot to go
and a little time to do it.
I gotta get some kind of mouth
on my pumpkin,
so it's time for an audible.
[whistle blows]
Oh, we're going with the bootleg smile.
You know what I remember seeing
in the pantry? Some lips.
Give me the lips.
That's the way to go.
I feel like a plastic surgeon
about to get my patient right.
One minute remains!
[Phil] All right. Teeth.
Oh.
Oh, my God. What am I missing?
Oh, my cat.
[Phil] Oh my gosh.
[Helen] Lid. Oh.
He's got a face.
-Five, four, three, two, one.
-You're done!
-[Justin] Oh, man, that's horrible.
-Ah!
At least I think mine'll taste good.
Oh, hi, hello, Helen. You were supposed
to make a grumpy, slimy, pumpkin head.
Let's see what you made.
[Helen] Nailed it.
-[laughs]
-You know...
[Chelsea] He's wearing
a little church hat.
[Nicole] It is very funny to me
because it has a mustache.
-In honor of...
-Jacques does not have a mustache.
No, no, no. He's French. He's French.
Oh, he's French.
Oh, he looks kind of French. The beret,
the mustache. Oui, oui, pumpkin.
All right, Jacques, why don't you serve
us up some of that grumpy pumpkin head?
Hmm.
[laughing]
That's...
That's a texture
I don't think I've ever had.
-Sticky.
-I don't taste jalapeño.
I taste sweetness.
I know it's popcorn
'cause it's shaped like it.
It reminds me of chewing paper
in elementary school
to make little spitballs.
What I don't taste is the caramel.
If you don't use a thermometer
to cook the sugar,
you stop the sugar
before the stage of caramel.
-That's what, uh, we missed there.
-Okay.
All right, Helen, I bid you adieu.
-Thank you.
-Merci.
Whoo! Whoo, whoo!
Phil!
Okay, so this is
the scaredy-slamming pumpkin head
you were trying to make. Let's see
the pumpkin head you made, Phil.
[Phil] Nailed it.
Oh, boy. [laughs]
Okay, we got
some candy corn thrown up in there.
-I think that's a spider on top.
-[Phil] Yes.
What's the white stuff all over his face?
Those are also teeth.
Oh, he has a tooth medley.
I didn't understand the whole geography.
Now I'm caught up. Thank you so much.
-[Phil] I appreciate it.
-[Nicole] Let's taste it.
-[Jacques] Cutting.
-[Jacques and Nicole] Oh.
-Okay.
-[Jacques] We have more caramel here.
[Nicole] Oh no.
I just had dental work,
and I hope you do not reverse it.
[Nicole] All right, let's do this. Oh boy.
[Chelsea laughs]
Judging by your facial expressions,
I feel like it's not going super well.
So, it's like, goopy?
Crunchy? Other stuff.
You have the caramel.
My guess is we went a little bit over 250,
so when you bite, you know,
it's a bit sticky and crunchy.
[Chelsea]
I've never eaten anything like it,
and I probably will stick to the foods
I normally eat going forward.
Why the chocolates in there?
I just thought it would be
just something a little extra.
And we love surprise, no?
-I love a surprise. Absolutely.
-Yeah, why not?
On that note, goodbye, Phil.
-Bye, Phil.
-Good luck on your journey.
Justin!
Let's see the happy, slimy pumpkin head
you were trying to make,
and let's see pumpkin head you made.
[Justin] Nailed it.
[laughing]
This is an Instagram moment.
[laughing]
[kissing noise]
[Nicole] This is so funny.
[laughing]
[Nicole] You got them big lips.
She's missing some lashes.
We got some hair.
She didn't get the full weave.
This is the smoothest pumpkin we've seen.
There's a good heft to it.
I don't know if I can accept the cat,
that little ball.
[cat snarls]
[laughing]
-Jacques, cut that pumpkin.
-[Jacques] Let's do it.
[Nicole] Uh-oh.
-[Chelsea] Right through the eyeball.
-[Nicole] Wow. Yeah.
-Jacques the Ripper.
-[Jacques] Jacques the Ripper!
Can I have those lips? Thank you.
[Chelsea] Mm.
[Chelsea laughs]
[Nicole] Look at Chelsea! She getting in!
Oh my God. It's very, very dense.
I was gnawing on it like that rat.
[judges laughing]
I think you don't feel your strength.
You just, you know...
But I feel the jalapeño.
Same.
It's actually... You cook it the right way.
You know, you did good.
[laughs]
Okay, let's sit.
[laughing]
Jacques, which baker served us
the tastiest,
slimiest pumpkin brains ever?
Nicole, one baker really delivered
on the slimy goods,
and that baker is...
Justin.
[Phil] Hey!
Yeah. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Chelsea, tell Justin what he's won.
Nicole, the popcorn party
is gonna keep on popping
when you take home
this popcorn prize package.
[Nicole] Wow.
[Jacques] Wow. Popcorn.
[Nicole] You also get
the amazing Nailed It! golden baker's cap.
Bakers, really great work,
but time to move on.
Yes, that's a fabulous idea.
Let's move to door number two.
[upbeat music plays]
♪ Oh, oh ♪
Listen up as Chelsea spills her guts.
Bakers, what I'm about to share
must remain within these
three or four, maybe six walls.
You've been given clearance for a project
of the highest level of national security.
Your stomachs may turn when you make this...
[mysterious music plays]
-[laughs]
-[Nicole] Alien autopsy cake!
[Justin] Oh man.
He's a sweet, cake treat.
And not only that...
[Helen] Oh no.
[Nicole] When you cut him open,
you'll find slimy alien gut ooze.
Look at that.
Ugh.
This oozing alien autopsy cake
is carved coconut cake
wrapped in fondant.
The eyes, teeth, and all the details
are made of modeling chocolate,
and the skin is airbrushed
with edible paint.
The inside of the alien ooze
has a slimy curd.
-Don't you love the word "curd"?
-Sure.
If you think you are going
to have a panic, I'm here.
Hit your panic button, and I will fly over
to you and help you for three minutes.
There's $10,000 on the line,
and 90 minutes of your time
is what it's going to take to do that.
And it started.
[horror music plays]
[action music plays]
This is so good.
[thunder rumbles]
Okay, this gotta come off
for one second so I can concentrate.
Stage one, I conquered you
just like I thought I would.
Stage two, beware.
Coconut. Okay.
[Phil] Get in that pantry.
Okay.
Jacques, how would you make
this alien autopsy cake?
-Nicole, I love this cake.
-Oh.
[Jacques] First, they need to mix
their cake batter
using coconut milk as flavoring.
Then make their buttercream
and gooey lime curd
and form the arms and legs
using rice cereal treats.
Next, assemble and cover with fondant,
taking care to line the belly
with chocolate before adding the curd.
And then, finally,
they should decorate their oozing alien
for a cake that is
truly out of this world.
I am going to try to get my cake
in the oven. How do you get this thing on?
I'm gonna calm down a little,
pay more attention to the directions.
You mix them separately.
My grandsons told me that.
But it's the old lady
and the two stud muffins.
It's not gonna go well.
Two cups of coconut milk.
It's supposed to look like that?
Ooh, I wonder...
That should be about two cups
when it melts, I guess, right?
Let's get the right height on these cakes.
I don't want my cakes too thin.
Okay.
Oh, this is thick.
[Justin] So I make my batter.
I was planning on going in to the pantry,
getting one of those square ones,
but I was like, "Maybe I can save
some time if I just grab this sheet pan."
Um, uh,
I haven't made a cake in a while, but...
-Ugh.
-This is gonna have to do.
-Okay.
-First in.
Helen, how you doing?
I think I'm doing better
than the first round.
Oh, this thing fell in the...
-What's going on?
-Thermometer fell in my cake.
-[Jacques] She tried to poison us.
-Did you get it out?
-[Helen] I did, yes.
-I don't want mercury poisoning.
But I do.
[laughing]
And this glove.
We don't want to eat that either.
Okay.
Next thing is make lime curd.
[Phil] My first time ever lime curd.
"Mix sugar, eggs,
and whisk the lime juice."
I have no idea what lime curd is,
but I'm confident I can follow
the recipe and make it taste good.
Okay.
Okay.
[clattering]
-[Phil] You okay, Helen?
-I'm okay.
All right.
My paper's catching fire.
I got that going for us.
My, uh, green stuff is thickening.
I don't think mine is going to thicken,
but I'm hoping it comes out okay.
Oh, yeah. I think that's what I want.
Does that look like alien guts or what?
[Nicole] Whoo! One hour left, bakers!
Oh, that escalated quickly.
[groans]
I should always read ahead.
When's nap time?
Helen.
We don't get a nap?
I'd like to phone a friend.
Can I buy a vowel, anything?
Okay.
[Justin]
Oh, that's not good at all. Oh, no!
My batter is overflowing and a lot jiggly.
Is something burning?
Yes, something's been burnt.
-[Chelsea] Burning bad!
-[Justin] I was giving the stove a taste.
I might've overfilled it a little bit.
I'm not really sure
what's going on in there...
I need help.
[screams]
It's a panic!
[screaming]
[Jacques] What's happening?
Did you overfill it?
Wow, look at that smoke, man. Ugh!
-[Nicole] Uh, did Justin burn something?
-No. I'm adding a smoky hint flavor.
He's burning the oven.
That's what's going on. [laughs]
[Nicole] You burned the oven?
And it smells bad.
-It does smell really bad.
-Mm-hmm.
[Jacques] That's not cooked. You
don't even have to do it. Forget about it.
-[Justin] It was...
-It's not cooked.
Your batter is too thick.
Give it another few minutes. Close it.
Okay. I just wanted to make sure.
I wanna be smelling
a warm vanilla-cake smell.
Sorry. You came to the wrong show.
That's fine. It's almost there.
-Okay, let that go a little bit more.
-Okay.
-You want it light and nice.
-Jacques, you're done.
-Okay, I'm done.
-Thank you very much.
Good luck.
Okay. I'm right where I want to be.
Trying to toast a little coconut
to put in the buttercream.
[Phil] I need something that's gonna
step up this cake a little bit.
Toasted coconut.
Hopefully, that's gonna give it
that extra something.
I like a little texture in my in between.
[laughs]
[Justin] This cake might be done.
I feel like this could go in there
like this because it's soft.
She had solid stick of butter
on the bottom of that bowl.
You got to melt it a bit, yeah?
Is this too full to put in there?
Oh no, Helen's having a rough time
with that buttercream.
Helen, how you doing
with that buttercream?
I'm doing great.
Just kidding. She's doing great.
[machine creaking]
-[Nicole] Oh, that sounds good.
-[judges laugh]
-That is a very interesting sound.
-[laughing]
That mixer has punched in. It is working.
[Jacques] It's too much stuff
in the mixer. The mixer can't turn.
-Did I do that?
-[Nicole] Ew. Ew. Ew.
I don't know what I did wrong there.
How are you doing with the arms, Helen?
-Haven't started them yet.
-I thought it'd be like Play-Doh.
[Phil] This alien cake is definitely
in the science world.
Unfortunately, I'm a physical science guy.
The fingers and arms and legs,
that's the biology world.
I feel like I need glue or something.
Thirty minutes!
[Justin] Every time I try to press
more crispy on, the other stuff falls off.
With the fingers, I end up
having to make an audible.
I get some black molding chocolate,
start rolling out little sausages
and sticking them on there.
Right where I want to be.
This is not at all sticking.
No!
Ugh. Bite me.
You said this show was fun.
You lied to me.
Ugh.
Helen, how's it going?
Great.
[laughing]
[Helen] That's only one? Oh God.
-Justin.
-What's up?
-Can you teach me how to tackle?
-Sure.
Ooh, really? Who should I tackle?
A camera operator?
-Wes.
-[laughing]
Wes, can I tackle you?
Okay, teach me how to tackle.
[Jacques laughs]
[Nicole] Okay, Justin.
So it's all about keeping your head up.
Same with your head.
-Keeping my head up.
-[Jacques] Nicole, be careful.
-[Nicole] Keep your head up, Wes.
-Bend over at the waist a bit.
There you go.
[laughing]
[Chelsea] Wes, watch out.
You're in danger!
Now go in for the tackle.
-[Nicole] I just go in and knock him over?
-Yes, pretty much.
[Nicole] All right.
-[Chelsea] Oh my God! Wow!
-[laughs]
-That was impressive, Nicole.
-Thank you.
Wow, the headphones came flying.
There's no way
that's not a slo-mo moment.
[Chelsea] Oh my God!
[in slow motion] Oh my God!
[laughs]
Eight minutes remain!
I'm in trouble.
All right, buttercream in.
[Jacques]
Look how thick is the buttercream.
-Is that bad? Oh, yeah.
-Look. Look like plaster.
[Justin] Y'all about to taste some paper.
I'm gonna cut it open,
and then put it in there.
[Phil] And then I gotta harden the belly.
[Helen] Ugh.
[Jacques] Helen's putting
molding fondant to insulate the...
[Nicole] Oh!
Well, that's something, right?
It doesn't work.
They need to put chocolates
in the cavity so, like, the curd
doesn't seep to the cake.
So, chocolate is waterproof?
-Chocolate is pretty much waterproof.
-All right.
I have a chocolate swimsuit.
[chuckles]
[alien growl]
[Phil] This is a different breed of alien.
My alien is, uh...
Incomplete? [chuckles]
And he's been so confident,
but the cracks are starting to show.
[Justin] This is a lot bluer
than I thought it was gonna be.
I messed this all the way up.
-[Helen] Ooh. Ooh. Don't break.
-Stick it right there.
Boy, this hair's heavy.
This is a nightmare.
A nightmare. Perfect for Halloween.
One minute remains! [laughs]
My hair's literally falling off.
Yeah, let's do eyeballs.
[Helen] Oh, the mouth.
Eyes.
[Phil laughs]
Man, don't got no legs.
It's time for an audible.
It's not looking good.
I looked over
and saw Phil did the same thing.
I was like, "Okay, I'm not the only one."
Ooh! Twenty-five seconds!
I'm gonna need a vacation after this.
[Phil] He's got a hat.
That did not go as planned.
Whatever. This is what y'all getting.
Five, four, three, two, one!
-You're done! And so is my wig.
-[alarm blares]
Can I please get this [beep] fixed?
All right, Helen, this is
the oozing alien autopsy cake
you were trying to make,
and let's see what you made.
Nailed it!
-Ooh, Helen.
-[laughing]
[Nicole] I like him.
I like that your alien's
wearing sunglasses?
I don't know if I can say
what the mouth looks like.
It looks exactly like that one.
[Jacques laughs]
Um, I like the idea
that there's cake in there.
It's the insides that matter to me,
because I have depth.
[chuckles]
Oh, good.
[Nicole] All right, Helen.
Cut that cake!
Let's see that ooze, Helen.
Oh, where the ooze at?
-Oh, there the ooze. Uh.
-[Chelsea] Uh.
-[Nicole] Yeah. Ooh, okay. Yes!
-Money shot!
-[Nicole] That's a little bit of ooze.
-[Helen] It's in there.
She didn't put any chocolates
on the bottom.
You put some rolling fondant.
The cake absorbed all the slime.
[Helen] Oh, sorry.
-I love you.
-[Nicole] Aw.
[Jacques] Yeah, sorry. Sorry, alien.
-You must be an incredible grandmother.
-I wish she were my grandma.
-[laughs]
-Oh, Helen. Roll on back there.
All right, Phil, let's see what you did.
Nailed it!
[laughing]
[Nicole] Boy, oh boy, are those legs tiny.
[Phil] I was having trouble
with the cereal treat.
-Did you have a clear view of that guy?
-[Jacques laughs]
It didn't seem to matter.
[laughing]
Phil, let's see it ooze.
[Phil] My pleasure.
Nice, happy cut.
[judges] Oh!
-Okay. All right. Oh yeah.
-Okay!
-[Jacques] Okay, oozing, okay.
-[Nicole] Yeah!
That's the oozone layer.
I can't believe...
-[mockingly murmurs]
-[laughing]
-[Nicole] Boy, oh boy.
-[Chelsea] Wow.
-[Nicole] Just the slow goops.
-[Chelsea] Oh gosh.
Well, Phil, we have another cake to see,
so I'm gonna ask you
to return to your station.
[Justin] Okay.
Okay, Justin, let's see what you made.
Nailed it!
[laughing]
This is the most haunted-looking thing
I've ever seen.
[Jacques] Oh my God.
[Nicole] Just the color you chose.
Those lips and those eyes.
-Are they upside down, the lips?
-Yeah, they are! The lips are upside down.
[Nicole]
Oh my God. This is incredible, Justin.
You gotta cut him.
-[Justin] Let's do this.
-He has no face.
[laughing]
[Nicole] The consistency, Justin!
Chelsea's crying.
There's something about
it oozing out of his happy face.
There you go.
[laughing]
-Very dramatic.
-[Nicole] There you go.
[Jacques]
Thank you, Justin. That was precious.
-Well...
-Bye.
[laughing]
[Nicole] All right, bakers, cut up
your best slice of these alien cakes.
Jacques, come on.
Chelsea, come on.
I feel I still got a chance.
I'm hoping that the flavor
wins me the championship.
You know, I'm not too far off,
if you squint really hard.
Helen, you're up first.
Let's jam on this cake.
What?
[laughing]
Your frosting is so thick.
But I don't mind. She a little thick,
so I identify with it. I like it.
So, the curd has the lime flavor,
and that help with the flavor
of the cake and the buttercream.
I mean, look, if you just
soften the butter into the mixer,
then it will be a lot lighter.
-Chelsea?
-Delicious. No, um...
[laughing]
Coming in hot, Chelsea.
[Chelsea] Helen, Helen.
Listen. It's just, like,
literally heavy, but it tastes good.
Thank you.
Okay, Phil.
Ready.
[Chelsea] Okay.
Hmm.
[laughing]
[Phil] It's not good.
[chuckles]
Nothing's dry.
That's pleasing to my taste buds.
Uh, I like the lime. Did you put
anything else into the cake?
Yes, sir. In the buttercream.
I tried to toast some coconut.
You toasted it yourself?
-Yeah. In the oven right behind me.
-[Nicole] Self toasting? Oh.
Yeah. Usually,
you know, the buttercream has moisture
and that the flake's going
to get back that moisture.
It's a step
that you don't have to take to toast it.
The first bite was
kind of gummy, I thought.
And I had another bite.
I go, "Maybe it's not."
I don't know. I'm losing
sort of my grip on reality. [laughs]
-I get it.
-Okay.
Justin. 'Tis time.
Oh man. Okay, here we go.
[chuckling]
The consistency of everything is off.
[laughs]
This is the wettest cake I've ever had.
Moist?
-No, not... It's wet.
-[Justin] Oh.
Oh darn.
It's just a little bit under. That's why.
And it's a bit heavy too. Uh...
That's nuts.
I don't know, like, how to put this
in football terms. A fumble?
Oh, that's not good.
The three of you are really nice people.
-And you love your families.
-[Nicole] Yeah.
And we're gonna have to pick a winner,
which seems inconceivable.
[laughing]
And somebody's gonna win money!
-[thunder rumbles]
-[scary music plays]
Whoever wins this challenge
walks away with $10,000
and the Nailed It! Halloween trophy.
[electronic music plays]
-Whoa! Wow!
-[judges laughing]
Oh! Wow! [screams]
[laughing]
Smile.
[laughing]
Okay, Chelsea, are you ready
to splash the cash?
Do I look ready?
[laughing]
Let's send this sucker
back where it came from.
-What? Is it too soon?
-Not yet!
[laughing]
Boy, that really got me good.
Uh, whoops.
Okay, Jacques?
Bakers, I have to say
that two of the cakes was pretty good,
but only one baker had a complete alien.
So, the winner is...
Helen.
-Helen! Yes! Yay!
-Yeah!
[Nicole] Oh, Helen.
Nana's bringing home the trophy.
[applause]
This means the world to me.
I really wanted to make
my grandkids proud.
I did it, babies. I did it.
You got a speech? Look at the camera
and give your speech.
I nailed it! Oh my God.
I'm gonna sleep with this.
[judges laughing]
Okay, I'm gonna take a picture.
Stay there! I'm gonna take a picture.
[Chelsea] Oh my goodness.
[scream]
That's it for this Nailed it! Halloween.
Slime you later!
[chuckles] Ho, ho, ho!
Happy Halloween!
[evil laughter]
Boy, this is like a fever dream sometimes.
[upbeat music plays]