My So-Called Life (1994–1995): Season 1, Episode 4 - Father Figures - full transcript
Angela gives her father the silent treatment, and Patty must deal with her own father when the printing shop is audited by the IRS.
Girl: ♪ GO NOW... GO! ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ HEY ♪
♪ HEY ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ HEY ♪
DADDY'S HOME!
HEY. HI, HONEY.
DADDY, DADDY, DADDY!
HELLO. ANYBODY HERE?
ANYBODY?
I'M HOME.
YOU NEVER SAID HE HAD STUBBLE.
HE DOESN'T, USUALLY.
SO I'M GOING.
I'M CATCHING THE
THIRD STREET BUS.
YOU COMING? UM, NO.
AMBER SAID SHE'D PICK
ME UP LATER. IS THAT OK?
SURE.
OK.
BYE.
HI.
HI.
OH, LOOK!
RICKIE AND YOUR DAD ARE BONDING.
COME ON.
UH, WELL, BYE.
BYE.
THEY'RE EXCHANGING FASHION TIPS.
RAYANNE! HA HA!
HEY. HA HA HA!
SO.
IS, UH, THIS THE FAMOUS RAYANNE?
AHEM. THIS IS THE
FAMOUS ANGELA'S DAD.
DAD, YOUR WHISKERS SCRATCH.
OH. SORRY.
I DID IT! GOOD.
HA HA! TURN DOWN YOUR FLAME.
OK. YOU'RE IN THE ZONE NOW.
SO, THE NEXT BATCH
WILL BE GREAT.
YOU FEEL LIKE
SOMETHING ELSE, HONEY?
YOU WANT ME TO MAKE
YOU SOMETHING ELSE?
I'LL HAVE FRITTERS.
I CAN MAKE YOU SOMETHING ELSE.
I AM SO HUNGRY.
DO YOU EVER GET, LIKE,
HYPNOTIZED BY FOOD?
OH, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
HYPNOTIZED BY FOOD
COULD BE MY INDIAN NAME.
HONEY, DO YOU WANT TO FLIP ONE?
RAYANNE CAN DO IT.
I GOT TO CALL MY BROTHER.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I AM
COOKING SOMETHING,
LIKE, NOT IN A POUCH.
I'LL STILL EAT IT.
THAT'S A WEIRD-SOUNDING
BEEP, NEIL.
HEY, LISTEN, YOU KNOW
THAT GUY, UH, EARL
THAT I DID THAT RUSH FOR?
HE LAID TWO TICKETS ON ME
TO THE DEAD CONCERT
THURSDAY NIGHT.
OH, MY GOD.
SAVE THE DATE. CALL ME BACK.
OK. BYE.
YOU'RE INTO THE DEAD?
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH. HEH.
OH, YEAH?
OH, THE, LIKE, UNDERCURRENT
OF CONNECTIONS
BETWEEN ANGELA AND ME.
YOU SEE, MY MOM'S GOING TO
THE DEAD SHOW THURSDAY NIGHT.
SHE... SHE'S A FORMER MORPH RAT.
THE... THE GRATEFUL DEAD IS
THIS THING THAT WE TOTALLY SHARE.
BEFORE SHE HAD ME,
SHE LIVED IN A BUS
FOR, LIKE, MONTHS
WITH A GIRL NAMED POP TART.
WELL, ANGELA'S NOT REALLY
INTO THE DEAD. AM I RIGHT?
OH, YOU WILL BE AFTER YOU
HEAR OUR BOOTLEG STUFF.
MY MOM GOT THIS
TAPE FROM THIS GUY.
MAYBE YOU KNOW HIM...
MIKE IN BOULDER, COLORADO.
NO. PALO ALTO '71.
THEY CLOSED WITH COSMIC CHARLIE.
RIGHT. I WAS THERE.
GET OUT OF HERE! HA HA!
HEH.
NICE SAVE... SWEETHEART.
MAY I SPEAK TO YOU FOR A MOMENT?
SURE.
Angela: WHEN YOU'RE NOT SURE
YOU TRUST A PERSON ANYMORE...
SAY A PERSON YOU
REALLY TRUSTED...
SAY YOUR FATHER...
YOU START WISHING THEY'D DO
SOMETHING, LIKE, REALLY WRONG,
JUST SO YOU COULD
BE RIGHT ABOUT THEM.
OK, BEAR WITH ME. I'M UPSET.
OH, LOOK. I KNOW HOW
YOU FEEL ABOUT HER.
BUT SHE'S ACTUALLY
NOT A BAD KID. WHO?
THAT RAYANNE PERSON? OH, PLEASE.
SHE'S THE LEAST OF MY PROBLEMS.
GOOD. 'CAUSE ANGELA
WANTS HER TO STAY TO DINNER.
FINE. I DON'T CARE.
WHATEVER. UH, UGH.
LISTEN, WE GOT A REALLY
UPSETTING LETTER TODAY.
OH, MAN.
THE I.R.S.
IT... IT... IT'S NOT
THE "A" WORD.
I CAN'T BELIEVE
WE'RE BEING AUDITED.
AT LEAST WOOD &
JONES PRINTING IS.
"YOUR FEDERAL INCOME TAX RETURN
HAS BEEN SELECTED
FOR EXAMINATION."
YOU KNOW, THIS IS REALLY SCARY.
THEY MUST GET STEPHEN
KING TO WRITE THESE.
I CALLED DAD. HE'S GONNA
COME OVER IN A LITTLE WHILE
SO WE CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT WE...
YOU TOLD YOUR DAD ABOUT THIS
BEFORE YOU TOLD ME?
HONEY, LOOK AT THE DATE... '92.
THAT'S THE YEAR HE GOT SICK,
THE YEAR I TOOK OVER.
OH, HE WAS NOT PLEASED.
YEAH. HE'S BEEN
CAUGHT RED-HANDED.
GRAHAM, HE WAS FLAT ON HIS
BACK IN A HOSPITAL THE SPRING OF '92.
IF ANYONE IS TO BLAME, IT'S ME.
I'M THE ONE WHO
PREPARED THE RETURN.
BECAUSE HE WAS TOO CHEAP
TO HIRE AN ACCOUNTANT. UNH.
PROMISE ME WE WILL
HANDLE THIS IN OUR OWN WAY.
HANDLE WHAT?
NOTHING.
WELL, WE'RE BEING AUDITED.
WELL, NOT US, EXACTLY.
WOOD & JONES PRINTING.
WHICH, OF COURSE, IS US.
WHY? DID YOU LIE
ABOUT SOMETHING?
WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME?
NOBODY LIED.
THIS CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE.
THEY PICK PEOPLE AT RANDOM.
BUT I'LL LAY EVEN MONEY
THAT GRANDPA LIED. HMM?
SO, CAN RAYANNE
STILL STAY FOR DINNER?
YES. YES.
JUST CHECKING.
DID YOU SEE THAT?
DO YOU HEAR THAT?
"JUST CHECKING."
DID YOU NOTICE THAT TONE
THAT SHE TAKES WITH ME NOW?
I DIDN'T NOTICE ANYTHING.
SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT
BETWEEN HER AND ME.
UH, SHE ACTS SO...
UH, DISTANT, WITH
THIS SORT OF...
SILENT CONTEMPT.
GRAHAM, SHE ADORES YOU,
AND I'VE GOT DIBS ON
HER SILENT CONTEMPT, OK?
Graham: OH, MAN. THIS IS THE
HARDEST HOMEWORK I'VE EVER SEEN.
LOOK AT THIS.
HUH.
I LIKE WHEN YOU DON'T
SHAVE, DADDY. YOU DO?
I LIKE HOW IT FEELS. HEH HEH.
B-B-B!
I CAN'T CONCENTRATE IN HERE.
AH. FINALLY.
I FOUND A COPY OF THE RETURN.
GOT A RAIN GUTTER OUT
THERE ABOUT TO FALL OFF.
THIS JUST IN.
HIT SOMEONE ON THE HEAD,
AND FIRST THING YOU KNOW, YOU'LL
HAVE A LAWSUIT ON YOUR HANDS.
YEAH. WE KNOW, DAD.
HI, GRANDPA.
HELLO, COOKIE.
OH. OK. THAT'S ENOUGH. HEH.
PLACE LIT UP LIKE A CHRISTMAS
TREE. YOU KNOW THAT?
GOT EVERY LIGHT IN
THE HOUSE BLAZING.
TRYING TO SUPPORT THE
ELECTRIC COMPANY SINGLE-HANDED?
DAD, WOULD YOU LIKE
ANYTHING? SOME FRUIT OR...
WELL, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT THERE?
WELL, THIS IS A COPY
OF THE '92 RETURN.
RAN MY OWN
BUSINESS FOR 30 YEARS.
NEVER GOT AUDITED.
DAD, YOU KNOW, THEY
PICK PEOPLE AT RANDOM.
YEAH? NEVER PICKED ME, THEN.
WELL, ANYWAY, THEY DO.
WELL, YOU SEND A
GIRL TO DO A MAN'S JOB...
WHAT'S THAT, CHUCK?
WHAT DID YOU SAY, DAD?
NEVER MIND. IT'S NOT
WORTH REPEATING.
WELL, UM, SO THEY DO SAY
THAT WHEN A SMALL
BUSINESS LIKE US
TAKES A NOTICEABLY
LARGE DEDUCTION
THAT'S HARD TO JUSTIFY...
WHO WOULD DO THAT?
WELL, DAD, LOOK HERE. THE CAR.
SEE, YOU TOOK OFF 87%.
IT WAS A BUSINESS CAR.
I KNOW, BUT THAT'S
THE KIND OF DEDUCTION
THAT YOU HAVE TO BACK
UP WITH A LOG OR SOME...
HEY, THERE'S MY GIRL. DADDY...
HIYA, HONEYBUNCH.
HI, GRANDPA.
HOW ARE YOU? OH... MMM. HEH HEH.
AHH. THIS IS GOOD.
YOU DON'T JUMP ON ME
LIKE YOUR SISTER, DO YOU?
YOU GOT BIG.
YOU'RE A GOOD KID, OK?
JUST GIVE ME THE
WALKMAN, PLEASE.
I... I DON'T HAVE A
WALKMAN. YOU D... ALL RIGHT.
I'LL... I'LL GIVE IT BACK
TO YOU AFTER SCHOOL.
I DON'T... JUST GIVE
ME THE WALKMAN.
CATALANO, GIVE HER
THE STUPID WALKMAN.
GOD, PEOPLE ARE
SO RUDE. HA HA HA!
SO, NOT TO SHOCK YOU,
BUT YOUR DAD'S ATTRACTIVE.
HEH. OH, I'M SURE.
NOT THAT I'D ATTACK
HIM OR ANYTHING,
BUT I WOULDN'T LEAVE
ME ALONE WITH HIM, EITHER.
OH, SO, WHEN I WAS LEAVING,
HE WAS THERE, AND
I WAS LIKE, "WELL, HI,"
AND HE WAS LIKE, "WELL, HI."
AND I WAS LIKE, "WELL, BYE,"
AND HE WAS, LIKE, "WELL..."
IT'S NOT JUST PHYSICAL.
HE... HE'S NICE.
YOU JUST HAVE A REALLY NICE DAD.
HE'S REALLY NICE.
WHEN SOMEONE
COMPLIMENTS YOUR PARENTS,
THERE'S, LIKE, NOTHING TO SAY.
IT'S LIKE A STUN
GUN TO YOUR BRAIN.
UH, PLUS HIS STUBBLE
IS THE PERFECT LENGTH.
HE DOESN'T HAVE STUBBLE.
HE RAN OUT OF DISPOSABLE
RAZORS THAT MORNING.
HE WAS ALL DISTURBED ABOUT IT.
OH, IN TOUCH WITH
HIS EMOTIONS DAD.
SHUT UP!
HA HA HA!
IGNORE ANGELA. SHE
CAN'T HELP HERSELF.
SHE'S THE PRODUCT OF A
TWO-PARENT HOUSEHOLD!
HEH HEH HEH!
Danielle: I KNOW. MY MOM'S BEEN
ON THE PHONE, LIKE, FOREVER.
WE'RE GETTING AUDITED.
I TALKED TO NEIL.
HE SAID, YOU KNOW, WE'RE CRAZY
TO DO THIS WITHOUT
AN ACCOUNTANT.
YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE SHOULDN'T GO INTO A
THING LIKE THIS UNPREPARED,
BUT I KNOW HIM, GRAHAM.
HE'LL NEVER AGREE TO...
HONEY, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT KIND OF TROUBLE
YOUR DAD'S GOTTEN US INTO,
BUT IF THEY FOUND SOMETHING,
WE GOT TO PAY UP,
YOU KNOW? TSK.
WHERE'S ANGELA?
LOCKED IN HER ROOM WITH
THAT RAYANNE PERSON. WHY?
I JUST WONDERED.
SHE HASN'T SAID TWO
WORDS TO ME ALL WEEK.
JOIN THE CLUB.
OH, I ALMOST FORGOT.
WE HAVE A TIME.
ARE YOU LISTENING?
TO MEET WITH THE I.R.S. LADY.
THIS THURSDAY, 4:00.
OH, WELL, THAT WILL
BE EASY TO REMEMBER.
IT'S THE SAME DAY
AS THE CONCERT.
WHAT?
OH, I NEVER MENTIONED
THAT EARL GAVE ME
TWO FREE TICKETS
TO THE DEAD CONCERT.
YOU'RE KIDDING.
OH, HONEY, COME
ON. IT'S THE DEAD.
GRAHAM...
HONEY!
PLEASE, PLEASE TELL ME
THAT YOU ARE NOT GOING
TO TOP OFF OUR AUDIT
WITH A ROCK CONCERT.
PLEASE, GRAHAM.
SO YOU DON'T WANT ME TO GO?
IT'S, UH...
AMBER.
VALLONE.
I'LL GET RAYANNE.
HI, HONEYBUNCH.
RAYANNE, YOUR MOM'S HERE.
I JUST GOT TO FIND MY
SOCK, 'CAUSE IT'S RICKIE'S.
SO, WHICH DAY IS YOUR
MOM GOING TO SEE THE DEAD?
THURSDAY. HER AND HER HONEY.
SHE'D NEVER LET
HIM HIT PITTSBURGH
AND NOT MAKE IT.
AH! YES.
SO, WOULD YOU TWO
LIKE TO GO WITH THEM?
TO SEE THE DEAD?
OH, MY GOD, ANGELA.
BUT WAIT. YOU REALLY WANT TO GO.
NO, I GOT WORK TO DO.
AND ANYWAY, I'M, UH,
TOO OLD FOR THAT STUFF.
HEH HEH. SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WOULD YOU LIKE THAT?
SURE.
THANK YOU! HEH HEH!
I MEAN THANK YOU SO...
NIGHT, ANGE! NIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT.
I KNOW YOU'RE NOT,
UH, WILD ABOUT THE DEAD
LIKE RAYANNE IS, BUT...
NO, IT'S FINE.
SO, WHERE ARE THE TICKETS?
OH.
HERE.
I FOUND ALL THOSE
RECEIPTS I FORGOT I HAD.
ALSO A DIRTY BOOK,
THAT LITTLE PEARL EARRING
I WAS SO UPSET ABOUT,
A BIRTHDAY CARD I NEVER
SENT TO MY MOTHER.
WHAT BOOK? AHEM.
I WANT THAT BACK.
UH, I'VE DECIDED TO
SKIP THE CONCERT.
OHH. THANK GOODNESS.
HEH!
UH... HA HA HA!
UH, YEAH, I GAVE
THE TICKETS TO, UH,
TO ANGELA AND
RAYANNE. HEH HEH HEH.
WHAT?
SERIOUSLY?
OH, YEAH. IT'LL BE FINE.
IT TURNS OUT THAT
RAYANNE'S MOTHER IS GOING.
WELL, OF COURSE
RAYANNE'S MOTHER IS GOING,
AND HEIDI FLEISS IS
PROBABLY MEETING HER THERE,
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
THAT ANGELA SHOULD GO.
PATTY, LISTEN...
AND, TO TOP IT ALL OFF,
IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT!
I MEAN, COULD YOU HAVE HAD
A MORE COMPLETELY TERRIBLE IDEA?
I'LL GET THE TICKETS BACK.
I DIDN'T THINK IT
THROUGH. I WAS...
YOU STILL AWAKE?
JUST MY BRAIN.
I'M SO ASHAMED. I
FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN BAD.
GOVERNMENT'S GOING TO GROUND ME.
ANGELA'S REALLY ACTING
WEIRD TOWARD ME, YOU KNOW?
YOU KNOW, I THINK I'M
GONNA HAVE TO ASK MY DAD
TO BUTT OUT OF THIS.
IT'S LIKE SHE'S HOLDING SOMETHING
AGAINST ME OR SOMETHING.
BUT HOW CAN I DO THAT?
HOW CAN I QUESTION HIS JUDGMENT?
HE... HE BUILT THIS
BUSINESS OUT OF NOTHING.
HE'S THIS RARE INDIVIDUAL...
OH, PATTY. YOU ARE 10 TIMES SMARTER
THAN YOUR DAD IS ABOUT BUSINESS.
TURN THAT OFF. I
CAN'T WATCH THAT GUY.
I MISS JOHNNY.
HEH HEH!
I KNOW.
I FELT FOR JOHNNY,
MARRIED TO ALL THOSE JOANNES.
I THINK OF HIM ALL ALONE
ON SOME GODFORSAKEN
MALIBU BEACH.
NO GUESTS.
GOD, I MISS HIM.
LOOK...
I'LL CALL HIM TOMORROW
AND I'LL TAKE HIM TO LUNCH,
AT THAT NEW PLACE
WITH THE FOUNTAIN,
THAT DOES ALL THE
NONFAT COOKING.
MOM'S BEEN WANTING
ME TO TAKE HIM THERE.
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA. YEAH.
AND IT'LL BE ON MY
TURF AND MY TERMS,
AND I'LL WAIT FOR JUST
THE RIGHT MOMENT,
AND I'LL SAY...
CHILI FRIES?
COME ON. TASTE ONE.
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME
YOU HAD A CHILI FRY?
I COULDN'T SAY.
PROBABLY TASTES
A WHOLE LOT BETTER
THAN THAT PLACE YOU SUGGESTED...
YOU KNOW, WITH THE
NO FAT, NO CHOLESTEROL,
NO FLAVOR. NO, THANK YOU.
DESSERT?
NONE FOR ME.
MELBA, BRING HER A PIECE
OF THAT BANANA CREAM PIE.
DAD, I DON'T WANT ANY PIE.
WELL, I MAY HAVE A LITTLE BITE.
YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED
TO HAVE ANY SUGAR.
IT'S BANANA. IT'S
ALL-NATURAL. OHH.
DAD,
ABOUT THE AUDIT.
UM, I THINK IT'S IMP...
OH. I ALMOST FORGOT.
MY DRIVING LOG.
YOU KEPT A DRIVING LOG?
WELL, YOU SEE IT
THERE, DON'T YOU?
Melba: BANANA CREAM PIE.
DAD.
OHH. YOU KNOW, NOT THAT YOU DID,
BUT THEY CAN TELL IF...
MMM. PATRICIA,
IT'S PERFECTLY LEGAL.
RECONSTRUCTION OF WHAT HAPPENED.
BEST OF MY ABILITY.
I SPOKE TO HER.
TO THE I.R.S. AGENT?
MM-HMM.
DAD, WE AGREED...
SHE HAS NO OBJECTION TO US
DOING THIS WITHOUT AN ACCOUNTANT.
WELL, OF COURSE NOT.
SHE'S PROBABLY THRILLED.
THEY WANT TO TRIP YOU UP.
THEY HAVE GOT ALL
SORTS OF TECHNIQUES.
HEY, I CAN HANDLE THE I.R.S.
WHAT I CAN'T HANDLE
IS MY OWN DAUGHTER
TELLING ME WHAT TO DO.
YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE MISSING.
Girl: AAH! NO! STOP IT!
STOP IT!
GOOD ONE!
STOP!
EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME!
WHOSE CLASSROOM IS THIS?
WHOSE CLASSROOM IS THIS?
MAYHEW'S.
AND WHERE IS MS. MAYHEW?
SHE IS OUT OF HERE.
SHE COULDN'T DEAL.
AREN'T YOU GUIDANCE? UH, YES.
WE NEED GUIDANCE,
MS. KRZYZANOWSKI.
HEY, I HAVE A QUESTION!
OK. ONE AT A TIME. YES.
OK. GIRL... GIRL
WITH THE RED HAIR.
IT'S MS. MAYHEW'S CLASS,
BUT I THINK SHE QUIT.
WHO HAS BEEN
TEACHING THIS CLASS?
UH, MR. RENALDI.
MR. RENALDI'S A SPANISH TEACHER.
THIS IS ENGLISH.
YEAH, RIGHT.
WELL WHAT DID MR. RENALDI DO
THE LAST TIME HE WAS HERE?
HE SHOWED A MOVIE. WHAT MOVIE?
ALIVE.
WHERE IS MR. RENALDI NOW?
HEY, CATALANO. JORDAN.
MR. CATALANO.
JOIN US.
OK. I'M GOING TO PAIR YOU OFF.
AND YOU ARE GOING TO WRITE
THREE SENTENCES ON THE MOVIE ALIVE.
AND YOU ARE GONNA TRADE PAPERS
AND DIAGRAM THOSE SENTENCES.
AND I'M GOING TO
SIT HERE AND WATCH
BECAUSE MY LIFE IS SO EMPTY.
OK. UM, YOU AND YOU,
YOU AND YOU,
YOU AND THE BOY IN BLUE,
AND YOU... THE PINK
SHIRT... YOU AND YOU.
I COULDN'T BELIEVE
THAT JORDAN CATALANO
WAS ACTUALLY TRYING
TO DIAGRAM MY SENTENCES.
HIS SENTENCES WERE REALLY SHORT.
TICKETS.
FOR THE GRATEFUL DEAD CONCERT.
NOT THAT I LIKE THE GRATEFUL
DEAD THAT MUCH, BUT...
YOU KNOW HOW SOMETIMES
THE LAST SENTENCE YOU SAID,
LIKE, ECHOES IN YOUR BRAIN
AND IT JUST KEEPS
SOUNDING STUPIDER?
AND YOU HAVE TO
SAY SOMETHING ELSE
JUST TO MAKE IT STOP.
OH, I JUST REMEMBERED.
I, UM, I OWE YOU $30.
UH, FOR THE I.D.
I DON'T HAVE IT ON ME,
BUT I...
SCALP YOUR DEAD TICKETS.
REALLY?
I DON'T KNOW ANYONE
WHO'D BUY THEM, DO YOU?
YOU SCALPED OUR DEAD
TICKETS? SHH! RAYANNE.
YOU WANT ME TO TALK TO HIM?
UH, MAYBE HE HASN'T SOLD THEM YET.
IT JUST SEEMED... I MEAN,
YOU'RE ALWAYS SAYING WE SHOULD
THINK OF WAYS TO MAKE MONEY.
YOU WANT ME TO? TO TALK TO
HIM? 'CAUSE I'M WILLING TO DO IT.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT MONEY?
WE HAD GRATEFUL DEAD TICKETS.
PEOPLE DON'T SELL
GRATEFUL DEAD TICKETS.
PEOPLE GIVE PEOPLE
GRATEFUL DEAD TICKETS.
I'M SORRY. I JUST... I
DIDN'T THINK IT WAS...
YOUR DAD GAVE THOSE
TICKETS TO BOTH OF US.
INCLUDING ME.
I HAVE TO GO. I GOT
TO GO TO HOME EC.
OH, MY GOD.
SHE MUST REALLY BE UPSET.
WHY'D YOU DO IT?
I MEAN, TO HAVE A REASON
TO TALK TO JORDAN?
NOT COMPLETELY.
THEN WHY?
I DON'T KNOW.
DAD, THE MEETING SHOULD
BE AT THE I.R.S. OFFICE.
YEAH, BUT, YOU DON'T KNOW
THAT SHE HAS AN APPOINTMENT
WITH A CHIROPRACTOR
IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD.
SHE MAY HAVE TOLD YOU THAT
SO SHE CAN GET A GOOD LOOK AT...
WHAT?
OK.
YEAH. SAY GOOD NIGHT TO MOM.
OHH.
I'M SO SCARED.
IT'S OK.
PRISON'S NOT THAT BAD.
AND... AND I'LL WAIT FOR YOU.
NOW HE'S GOT THAT
AGENT COMING HERE.
IT'S EXACTLY WHAT ALL THE BOOKS
SAY NEVER TO DO.
I CAN'T GET HIM TO LISTEN.
PATTY, LISTEN...
YOU ORDER PEOPLE
AROUND ALL DAY LONG...
PEOPLE LIKE ME.
LUNCH WAS A DISASTER.
HE FORCED ME TO ORDER PIE,
AND I ACTUALLY ATE IT.
I MEAN, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
WHY DO I BECOME AN
8-YEAR-OLD AROUND HIM?
OHH.
SO, MY ROTTEN DAY
IS LIKE FOREPLAY?
I LIKE IT WHEN YOU'RE...
WHEN YOU ACTUALLY NEED ME.
OF COURSE I NEED YOU.
DID YOU TALK TO ANGELA
ABOUT THE CONCERT?
UH, I WILL.
I PROMISE.
Danielle: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
GET OUT OF HERE.
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT
I WAS LOOKING FOR...
SOME KIND OF...
PROOF...
SOMETHING THAT WOULD
MAKE IT MAKE SENSE
FOR ME TO HATE HIM.
UM, I... I LOST...
PART OF MY HOMEWORK.
DID YOU FIND IT?
NO.
MISS MANDEVILLE.
MRS. CHASE.
THAT WAS MY GRANDMOTHER'S.
SHE WAS COMPLETELY
DOTTY, OF COURSE. HEH.
IT'S PRACTICALLY WORTHLESS.
KEEPS GOOD TIME, THOUGH.
WELL, THEN IT'S NOT WORTHLESS.
YOU SEE, I WAS THE ONE
WHO ACTUALLY
PREPARED THE RETURN.
UH, MISS MANDEVILLE?
I DON'T KNOW IF YOUR
RECORDS INDICATE THIS,
BUT I AM A VETERAN.
SO...
I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO
CONCEAL ANYTHING, THAT'S ALL.
I WOULD ALSO LIKE
TO ADD THAT, UH,
DURING THE FISCAL
YEAR IN QUESTION,
I WAS FELLED BY A
NEAR-FATAL HEART ATTACK...
AND WAS LATER FOUND TO
BE, UH, SICK WITH DIABETES.
WELL, YOU LOOK JUST FINE NOW.
WELL, I JUST DON'T THINK I SHOULD
BE PENALIZED FOR BOUNCING BACK
LIKE I DID. WHY ARE YOU
TELLING ME THIS, MR. WOOD?
NO REASON.
WE'VE COVERED A LOT OF GROUND.
THANK YOU. THIS
WAS VERY HELPFUL.
UH, YOU CAN KEEP IT IF YOU LIKE.
UH, THAT WON'T BE NECESSARY.
OH, GOD.
I FORGOT TO TALK TO
ANGELA ABOUT THE CONCERT.
ANYWAY, IT'S OBVIOUS
WE'LL BE SEEING
A LOT MORE OF EACH OTHER.
PROMISE ME YOU'LL KEEP
THAT IN MIND, MR. WOOD.
YOU WON'T GO GALLIVANTING OFF
ON SOME CARIBBEAN VACATION.
WHAT?
I HAVE BEEN TO THE
CARIBBEAN EXACTLY ONCE.
IN '56.
YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU
DON'T TAKE LAVISH VACATIONS?
'CAUSE I GOT THE DISTINCT
IMPRESSION THAT YOU...
LAVISH?
MY WIFE WON'T FLY.
SHE GETS SEASICK.
I'VE NEVER BEEN TO EUROPE.
YOU TOLD ME YOURSELF THAT
YOU DO TAKE A LOT OF TIME OFF.
WE HAVE TO. WE HAVE TO GET AWAY.
YOU KNOW, BUT THOSE ARE
MOTORING TRIPS, YOU KNOW.
WE'VE ALWAYS TAKEN THOSE,
YOU KNOW, LIKE
INTO THE MOUNTAINS.
AH. SOUNDS FUN.
UH, WHAT CAR DO YOU USE?
UH, THE WAGON.
UH, I MEAN,
EITHER CAR.
THE COMPACT USUALLY.
OK... HERE IS WHAT
WE'RE GOING TO DO.
LOOK, THIS HAS
NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
WE ARE GOING TO PAY ALL
THE TAXES THAT WE OWE.
PAY WHAT? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?
CHUCK, COME ON.
DADDY, PLEASE. JUST...
JUST WHAT? JUST SIT HERE
AND LET YOU SELL
ME DOWN THE RIVER?
DADDY, I'M TRYING
TO HELP YOU HERE.
HELP ME? I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP.
DO WE HAVE AN AGREEMENT?
WE ABSOLUTELY HAVE AN AGREEMENT.
AGREEMENT?
WHO THE HELL ARE YOU
TO MAKE AN AGREEMENT?
HEY. DADDY, PLEASE.
CHUCK, COME ON.
DO WHAT YOU WANT.
I DON'T GIVE A DAMN.
THANK YOU.
YOU HAVE BEEN VERY PATIENT.
I'M, UH, SORRY THAT, UH...
ANGELA? I HAVE TO...
UH, DAD, I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW.
ANGELA.
UM, I'M JUST SORRY YOU
HAD TO WITNESS THAT, UH,
BUSINESS BETWEEN
ME AND MY FATHER.
SMALL POTATOES
COMPARED TO WHAT I'VE SEEN.
WE'VE GOT A PROBLEM.
IT'S MY MISTAKE.
I SHOULD HAVE TALKED
TO YOUR MOTHER FIRST.
THE THING IS, I CAN'T ALLOW YOU
TO GO TO THAT CONCERT TONIGHT.
WHAT? THE THING IS,
YOUR MOTHER IS JUST
NOT COMFORTABLE WITH IT.
SO, I'M SORRY.
UM, YOU BETTER GIVE
THE TICKETS BACK.
WHY DO YOU NEED THE TICKETS?
WELL, WHY DO YOU NEED
THEM IF YOU'RE NOT GOING?
JUST GIVE THEM BACK.
RAYANNE HAS THEM,
AND SHE'S GOING TO
BE HERE ANY SECOND.
LOOK, I'M SORRY. NO, I'M SORRY!
I MEAN, SHE'S GONNA... SHE'S
COUNTING ON ME TO COME.
AND I'M NOT GONNA
DO THIS TO HER.
ANGELA, LOOK. LET ME...
LET ME CALL RAYANNE.
I WILL EXPLAIN IT TO HER.
IT WAS YOUR IDEA.
I MADE... I MADE A
MISTAKE. I'M NOT PERFECT.
OH, BELIEVE ME, THAT'S
BECOME REALLY CLEAR.
THERE SHE IS.
ANGELA. ANG...
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
SHE GET INTO RAYANNE'S CAR?
SHE'S GONE.
I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT
YOU LET THIS GO THIS LONG.
PATTY, I FORGOT. ALL RIGHT?
OH, COME ON. WHY
DON'T YOU JUST ADMIT IT?
YOU WANT HER TO GO
TO THIS STUPID CONCERT.
ALL RIGHT! I ADMIT IT, OK?
LOOK, I SAW THE GRATEFUL
DEAD WHEN I WAS 15 YEARS OLD.
IT WAS ONE OF THE EIGHT
BEST NIGHTS OF MY LIFE.
OH... IT WAS SOMETHING
I WANTED TO GIVE HER.
OH, FINE. LEAVE.
JUST LIKE HE DOES.
YOU LEAVE MY FATHER OUT OF THIS.
WHAT? WHAT DID YOU SAY?
IT'S NOT WORTH REPEATING.
Woman: AND BRIAN, MAKE
SURE THE LID'S ON TIGHT.
HI.
UM,
IT... IT WASN'T LOCKED,
AND... I... I CAN'T GO
HOME RIGHT NOW.
AND THERE'S NOWHERE ELSE
TO GO, AND F... I'M FREEZING.
ARE YOU, LIKE, MEETING
SOMEONE IN HERE?
THAT'S SO UNFUNNY.
WHAT ABOUT...
MY ROOM?
WHAT ABOUT YOUR PARENTS?
THEY WON'T EVEN NOTICE.
THEY'RE BALANCING
THEIR JOINT CHECKING.
AHEM. MINE ARE GETTING AUDITED.
MINE ARE PROBABLY
GETTING A CITATION FOR, LIKE,
BEST PENMANSHIP ON A
TAX RETURN OR SOMETHING.
CAN I JUST STAY HERE,
JUST FOR A WHILE?
HOW COME YOU CAN'T GO HOME?
MM.
MY DAD THINKS I'M AT A
GRATEFUL DEAD CONCERT,
AND HE'D BE REALLY
UPSET IF HE KNEW I WASN'T.
WOW.
YOUR DAD IS SO
DIFFERENT FROM MY DAD.
LOOK, IT'S MY CAR.
I THINK I HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW.
DOES THIS INVOLVE
JORDAN CATALANO?
OHH.
ANGELA, WAIT.
DID YOU EVER THINK THAT I COULD
ACTUALLY BE DOING SOMETHING
THAT DOES NOT INVOLVE YOU?
I MEAN, THAT I MAY NOT
JUST BE SITTING AROUND
IN CASE YOU DECIDE, LIKE, THAT
MOMENT THAT YOU NEED MY CAR?
SO, WHAT WERE YOU DOING?
NOTHING.
YOU WANT MY SWEATER?
OK.
HERE.
JUST TRY NOT TO SWEAT INTO IT.
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO
SAY THINGS LIKE THAT?
WHY DO YOU HAVE...
Woman: BRIAN, THERE'S
ANOTHER BAG OF GARBAGE HERE!
I KNOW.
TONIGHT, BRIAN! NOT NEXT WEEK.
WHAT'S REALLY HORRIBLE
IS BEING A WITNESS
WHILE SOMEONE'S PARENTS
ORDERS THEM AROUND.
IT RUINS THE CONVERSATION.
BRIAN?
SO, WAIT. WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
NOTHING. JUST...
YOU SHOULDN'T ACT ONE
WAY TOWARDS A PERSON
WHEN YOU NEED
SOMETHING, AND THEN...
DANNI, JUICE?
EW, NOT THE PULP KIND.
OH. RIGHT.
I'LL TAKE SOME.
YOU LEFT YOUR, UH, SCOTTIE
SWEATER IN MY CAR, HONEYBUNCH.
OH, THANKS. I WAS SEARCHING.
ANGELA,
ORANGE JUICE DOESN'T
GROW ON TREES.
IT SORT OF DOES.
DID YOU SEE HOW HE'S BEING?
DON'T CALL YOUR FATHER "HE."
MOM, HE DIDN'T WANT ME
TO GO TO THE CONCERT,
SO, FINE. I DIDN'T GO.
UH, BUT YOU LET HIM
THINK YOU WERE GOING.
YOU SOLD TICKETS YOU
HAD NO BUSINESS SELLING,
AND YOU WERE LESS
THAN FORTHRIGHT,
TO SAY THE LEAST.
THEN WHY CAN'T HE JUST SAY THAT
INSTEAD OF ACTING
LIKE I DON'T EXIST?
DAD NOT EVEN
WANTING TO LOOK AT ME
IS, LIKE, THE WORST FEELING.
I KNOW.
Angela: RAYANNE! RICKIE!
Rayanne: IT WAS SO
BEYOND. OH, MY GOD. HEH.
FINALLY. I'VE BEEN LOOKING
EVERYWHERE FOR YOU GUYS.
ANYWAY, UM, SO, I'LL
SEE YOU AT LUNCH.
I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE'S THIS MAD.
I KNOW. BUT, SEE, I CAN
SEE IT FROM YOUR SIDE.
BUT I ALSO SEE IT FROM HER SIDE
AND FROM MY OWN SIDE. HEH.
I DON'T REALLY HAVE A SIDE.
ANYWAY, WHY'D YOU DO IT?
I MEAN, WERE YOU
MAD AT YOUR DAD?
WHAT? WHO SAID THAT?
WELL, WITH MY DAD,
WHO'S TECHNICALLY MY UNCLE,
BUT HE RAISED ME,
I MEAN, IF HE GIVES ME SOMETHING
AND I'M MAD AT HIM,
I CAN'T OPEN IT.
BUT THAT'S DIFFERENT 'CAUSE...
I'M SOMEWHAT AFRAID OF MY DAD.
I MEAN, IN THE PAST,
MY DAD HAS BROKEN DOWN MY DOOR.
MY DAD ALWAYS KNOCKS.
I HAD A FEELING.
OHH.
OH, THAT'S NICE.
SO, UM, WHAT DID
HE SAY? I DON'T KNOW.
REALLY? MM-HMM.
BUT HE WASN'T MAD
ABOUT THE DEAD?
HE GROUNDED ME.
NO, REALLY?
GIVE ME A DRAG.
RAYANNE?
RAYANNE, I FEEL TERRIBLE, OK?
AND I HAVE TO GO TO
HEALTH IN A FEW MINUTES.
WHY?
WHY DO I FEEL TERRIBLE?
YEAH.
BECAUSE...
OF WHAT I DID.
THAT YOU DIDN'T GET
TO GO TO THE CONCERT.
NO, I DID. IT WAS GREAT.
THEY PLAYED STAGGER LEE.
AMBER AND RUSTY TOOK ME.
RUSTY RAN INTO THIS GUY
HE KNEW FROM VIETNAM
WHO'S IN A WHEELCHAIR.
HE HAD AN EXTRA TICKET.
HE HAD A SEXY UPPER BOD, TOO.
OHH.
MAKING YOU FEEL BAD IS TOO EASY.
IT TAKES ALL THE FUN OUT OF IT.
LOOK, YOUR DAD PROBABLY
GIVES YOU STUFF ALL THE TIME.
SO, IT'S NO BIG DEAL TO YOU.
BUT TO ME...
THE FACT THAT HE DID THAT...
FACE IT. I'M ENVIOUS.
I'M A GREEN-EYED MONSTER.
YOU DON'T KNOW
EVERYTHING ABOUT MY DAD.
REMEMBER THE NIGHT WE
COULDN'T GET INTO LET'S BOLT?
I SAW HIM AROUND THE
CORNER FROM OUR HOUSE,
AND HE WAS TALKING TO THIS GIRL,
LIKE, IN HER TWENTIES.
SO?
SO...
I'M LUCKY.
MY DAD'S HAD, LIKE, EIGHT
DIFFERENT GIRLFRIENDS
SINCE HE LEFT. SO...
I'M USED TO IT.
BUT, ANGELA,
WHATEVER YOUR DAD MAY BE DOING,
WITH WHATEVER GIRL...
AND YOU DON'T
EVEN KNOW IF HE IS...
HE'S STILL THE TYPE OF DAD
THAT WOULD LAY TWO
DEAD TICKETS ON YOU...
OUT OF NOWHERE.
HEH.
THAT'S WHAT MATTERS.
DADDY?
HUH?
I'M SORRY. I DIDN'T MEAN TO...
PATRICIA, YOU WANT TO GIVE
ME ANOTHER HEART ATTACK?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
WORKING SO LATE?
WHAT'S ALL THIS?
THAT'S MY MASTER PLAN, DAD.
I WANT WOOD & JONES PRINTERS
TO MOVE INTO THE WORLD
OF HIGH-SPEED COPIERS.
DID YOU READ IT?
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WELL, IT'S AN AWFUL LOT OF
MONEY TO SPEND IN ONE FELL SWOOP.
YOU KNOW, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I
THOUGHT, DAD. AND THEN IT CAME TO ME...
LEASE IT.
I MEAN, THAT WAY IT ONLY
COSTS ABOUT 8 GRAND A MONTH.
WELL, YEAH, I KNOW THAT'S...
THAT'S NOT PEANUTS, BUT, OH, DAD,
IT LOOKS LIKE OFFSET.
PEOPLE WON'T HAVE TO GO TO AN
OFFSET PRINTER. THEY CAN COME TO US.
WE CAN KEEP MORE STUFF IN-HOUSE.
WELL, I SEE YOU GOT
IT ALL FIGURED OUT.
HEH.
YOU KNOW, I COULD
WORK 16 HOURS A DAY,
AND IT WOULDN'T BE ENOUGH.
YOU KNOW HOW LATE I WORK.
I KNOW YOU CAME HERE
TO MAKE UP WITH ME.
ME? HUH.
I'M STILL WAITING
FOR AN APOLOGY.
WELL, YOU'LL BE WAITING A WHILE.
DAD, I HAVE OPINIONS.
I HAVE TO HAVE THEM,
AND STICK TO THEM,
MAKE DECISIONS.
I HAVE TO.
YOU ASKED ME TO
WHEN YOU ASKED ME...
I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO BANK...
NO, DAD, YOU HAVE TO HEAR THIS!
WHEN YOU ASKED ME TO TAKE OVER,
WHEN YOU ASKED ME
TO RUN THIS BUSINESS,
MAYBE YOU DIDN'T KNOW
WHAT YOU WERE ASKING.
GOD KNOWS I DIDN'T.
AND SOMETIMES I MISS HOW
IT USED TO BE WHEN I NEVER...
QUESTIONED YOU.
BUT I'VE... I'VE TURNED SOME
SORT OF CORNER WITH THIS,
AND... AND I CAN'T GO BACK.
YEAH, WELL, THAT'S YOUR...
THAT'S YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
SO... WHY DOES THERE HAVE TO BE
THIS DISTANCE BETWEEN US?
WELL, THAT'S NOT MY DOING.
ALL RIGHT NOW.
UM, IT'S ALL RIGHT.
CAREFUL, I... I
DIDN'T SHAVE TODAY.
DIDN'T HAVE TO.
THAT'S THE GOOD THING
ABOUT RETIREMENT.
I DON'T CARE.
WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE GIRL,
I'D GO TO GIVE YOU
A KISS GOOD NIGHT.
BOY, IF I HADN'T SHAVED,
YOU'D PUSH ME AWAY.
YOU SAID MY WHISKERS
WERE TOO ROUGH.
WELL, THEY WERE THEN.
THAT'S WHAT IT IS
TO RAISE A GIRL...
WALKING ON EGGSHELLS
HALF THE TIME.
YOU HUNGRY?
COME ON, I'LL BUY
YOU A PIECE OF PIE.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
ASLEEP HOURS AGO.
SO, IT SEEMS THAT THE
BREAKUP OF THE BEATLES
HAD LESS TO DO WITH YOKO ONO
AND MORE TO DO WITH THE FACT
THAT PAUL WANTED LINDA'S FATHER
TO BE THEIR NEW
BUSINESS MANAGER.
WHY DO YOU THINK PEOPLE
GIVE HER SUCH A HARD TIME?
IS IT JUST BECAUSE
SHE CAN'T SING?
I'VE WORKED SO HARD...
TO PLEASE HIM, YOU KNOW?
HE DOESN'T REALIZE...
WHAT THIS ALL COSTS ME. HE...
HE'S NEVER REALLY
KNOWN WHAT I'M WORTH.
YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES I THINK
THAT I PARTLY MARRIED
YOU BECAUSE I KNEW...
KNEW WHAT?
THAT YOU'D BE A
REALLY GOOD FATHER.
A DIFFERENT KIND OF FATHER.
AND YOU ARE.
GRAHAM.
LISTEN TO ME.
I... I DON'T WANT TO LOSE HER.
YEAH, BUT YOU HAVE TO,
JUST FOR A LITTLE WHILE.
YOU HAVE TO LET
HER PUSH YOU AWAY
AND NOT PUNISH HER FOR IT.
ALL SHE'S DOING IS PUSHING
YOU OFF YOUR PEDESTAL.
AND SHE'S RIGHT TO DO
THAT. SHE HAS TO DO IT.
SHE'S RIGHT ON SCHEDULE.
SHE'S NOT 1,000 YEARS LATE,
LIKE I AM.
SO... SO, UM, WHAT DO I DO? HEH.
STAND YOUR GROUND.
YOU LET HER KNOW THAT
NO MATTER HOW HARD
SHE PUSHES YOU AWAY,
YOU'LL STILL BE THERE.
I LOVE YOU.
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
SO MUCH.
♪ I TOLD ALTHEA ♪
♪ I WAS FEELIN' LOST ♪
♪ LACKIN' IN SOME DIRECTION ♪
♪ ALTHEA TOLD ME ♪
♪ UPON SCRUTINY ♪
♪ THAT MY BACK MIGHT ♪
HEY!
♪ NEED PROTECTION... ♪
HEY!
HEY, WANT TO GIVE
ME A HAND WITH THIS?
WANT TO GIVE ME A HAND?
FOR A SECOND! GIVE ME A HAND.
THIS. WANNA...
COME OVER HERE... FOR A SECOND.
GIVE ME A HAND.
GEE, THANKS. WELL, I'D...
I'D LIKE TO HELP YOU, SIR,
BUT I'M TOO BUSY PICTURING
YOUR DAUGHTER NAKED.
TAKE THAT OUT TO YOUR FATHER.
MOM SAID I SHOULD
BRING THIS TO YOU.
JUST PUT IT DOWN THERE.
HEY, GIVE ME A HAND WITH THIS.
NOW?
YEAH. NOW.
COME UP HERE AND, UH,
HOLD THIS IN PLACE, PLEASE.
HEY, YOU WANT TO USE THIS THING?
WORK OUT A LITTLE OF
THAT PENT-UP ANGER?
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT'S ANGRY.
♪ OR JUST ANOTHER
PRETTY FACE... ♪
SO, TELL ME, UM...
WHAT'D YOU GET FOR THE TICKETS?
ALTOGETHER, 120,
BUT, UM, I OWED THIS GUY $30.
REALLY? AND WHY IS THAT?
DAD, I CAN'T GET INTO IT.
IT'S TOO...
STUPID AND COMPLICATED.
♪ SELF-CENTERED... ♪
SO THAT LEAVES $90 PROFIT.
WELL, YOU BETTER
DECLARE THAT AS INCOME.
DECLARE IT TO WHO? TO ME.
YOU GET MY POINT?
SO, RAYANNE SAID THE
CONCERT WAS REALLY GOOD.
CAN I TURN THIS OFF?
UNH.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU LIKE
LISTENING TO THESE DAYS?
I DON'T KNOW. UM...
SMASHING PUMPKINS,
RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE,
PORNO FOR PYROS. OH, YEAH, YEAH.
I LOVE THEIR CHRISTMAS ALBUM.
HEH.
UM...
STONE TEMPLE PILOTS,
UH, I LIKE BILLIE HOLIDAY.
WAIT, WAIT. YOU
LIKE BILLIE HOLIDAY?
YEAH.
♪ AND DANCE ♪
♪ BY THE LIGHT OF THE MOON ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ HEY ♪
♪ HEY ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ HEY ♪
DADDY'S HOME!
HEY. HI, HONEY.
DADDY, DADDY, DADDY!
HELLO. ANYBODY HERE?
ANYBODY?
I'M HOME.
YOU NEVER SAID HE HAD STUBBLE.
HE DOESN'T, USUALLY.
SO I'M GOING.
I'M CATCHING THE
THIRD STREET BUS.
YOU COMING? UM, NO.
AMBER SAID SHE'D PICK
ME UP LATER. IS THAT OK?
SURE.
OK.
BYE.
HI.
HI.
OH, LOOK!
RICKIE AND YOUR DAD ARE BONDING.
COME ON.
UH, WELL, BYE.
BYE.
THEY'RE EXCHANGING FASHION TIPS.
RAYANNE! HA HA!
HEY. HA HA HA!
SO.
IS, UH, THIS THE FAMOUS RAYANNE?
AHEM. THIS IS THE
FAMOUS ANGELA'S DAD.
DAD, YOUR WHISKERS SCRATCH.
OH. SORRY.
I DID IT! GOOD.
HA HA! TURN DOWN YOUR FLAME.
OK. YOU'RE IN THE ZONE NOW.
SO, THE NEXT BATCH
WILL BE GREAT.
YOU FEEL LIKE
SOMETHING ELSE, HONEY?
YOU WANT ME TO MAKE
YOU SOMETHING ELSE?
I'LL HAVE FRITTERS.
I CAN MAKE YOU SOMETHING ELSE.
I AM SO HUNGRY.
DO YOU EVER GET, LIKE,
HYPNOTIZED BY FOOD?
OH, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
HYPNOTIZED BY FOOD
COULD BE MY INDIAN NAME.
HONEY, DO YOU WANT TO FLIP ONE?
RAYANNE CAN DO IT.
I GOT TO CALL MY BROTHER.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I AM
COOKING SOMETHING,
LIKE, NOT IN A POUCH.
I'LL STILL EAT IT.
THAT'S A WEIRD-SOUNDING
BEEP, NEIL.
HEY, LISTEN, YOU KNOW
THAT GUY, UH, EARL
THAT I DID THAT RUSH FOR?
HE LAID TWO TICKETS ON ME
TO THE DEAD CONCERT
THURSDAY NIGHT.
OH, MY GOD.
SAVE THE DATE. CALL ME BACK.
OK. BYE.
YOU'RE INTO THE DEAD?
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH. HEH.
OH, YEAH?
OH, THE, LIKE, UNDERCURRENT
OF CONNECTIONS
BETWEEN ANGELA AND ME.
YOU SEE, MY MOM'S GOING TO
THE DEAD SHOW THURSDAY NIGHT.
SHE... SHE'S A FORMER MORPH RAT.
THE... THE GRATEFUL DEAD IS
THIS THING THAT WE TOTALLY SHARE.
BEFORE SHE HAD ME,
SHE LIVED IN A BUS
FOR, LIKE, MONTHS
WITH A GIRL NAMED POP TART.
WELL, ANGELA'S NOT REALLY
INTO THE DEAD. AM I RIGHT?
OH, YOU WILL BE AFTER YOU
HEAR OUR BOOTLEG STUFF.
MY MOM GOT THIS
TAPE FROM THIS GUY.
MAYBE YOU KNOW HIM...
MIKE IN BOULDER, COLORADO.
NO. PALO ALTO '71.
THEY CLOSED WITH COSMIC CHARLIE.
RIGHT. I WAS THERE.
GET OUT OF HERE! HA HA!
HEH.
NICE SAVE... SWEETHEART.
MAY I SPEAK TO YOU FOR A MOMENT?
SURE.
Angela: WHEN YOU'RE NOT SURE
YOU TRUST A PERSON ANYMORE...
SAY A PERSON YOU
REALLY TRUSTED...
SAY YOUR FATHER...
YOU START WISHING THEY'D DO
SOMETHING, LIKE, REALLY WRONG,
JUST SO YOU COULD
BE RIGHT ABOUT THEM.
OK, BEAR WITH ME. I'M UPSET.
OH, LOOK. I KNOW HOW
YOU FEEL ABOUT HER.
BUT SHE'S ACTUALLY
NOT A BAD KID. WHO?
THAT RAYANNE PERSON? OH, PLEASE.
SHE'S THE LEAST OF MY PROBLEMS.
GOOD. 'CAUSE ANGELA
WANTS HER TO STAY TO DINNER.
FINE. I DON'T CARE.
WHATEVER. UH, UGH.
LISTEN, WE GOT A REALLY
UPSETTING LETTER TODAY.
OH, MAN.
THE I.R.S.
IT... IT... IT'S NOT
THE "A" WORD.
I CAN'T BELIEVE
WE'RE BEING AUDITED.
AT LEAST WOOD &
JONES PRINTING IS.
"YOUR FEDERAL INCOME TAX RETURN
HAS BEEN SELECTED
FOR EXAMINATION."
YOU KNOW, THIS IS REALLY SCARY.
THEY MUST GET STEPHEN
KING TO WRITE THESE.
I CALLED DAD. HE'S GONNA
COME OVER IN A LITTLE WHILE
SO WE CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT WE...
YOU TOLD YOUR DAD ABOUT THIS
BEFORE YOU TOLD ME?
HONEY, LOOK AT THE DATE... '92.
THAT'S THE YEAR HE GOT SICK,
THE YEAR I TOOK OVER.
OH, HE WAS NOT PLEASED.
YEAH. HE'S BEEN
CAUGHT RED-HANDED.
GRAHAM, HE WAS FLAT ON HIS
BACK IN A HOSPITAL THE SPRING OF '92.
IF ANYONE IS TO BLAME, IT'S ME.
I'M THE ONE WHO
PREPARED THE RETURN.
BECAUSE HE WAS TOO CHEAP
TO HIRE AN ACCOUNTANT. UNH.
PROMISE ME WE WILL
HANDLE THIS IN OUR OWN WAY.
HANDLE WHAT?
NOTHING.
WELL, WE'RE BEING AUDITED.
WELL, NOT US, EXACTLY.
WOOD & JONES PRINTING.
WHICH, OF COURSE, IS US.
WHY? DID YOU LIE
ABOUT SOMETHING?
WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME?
NOBODY LIED.
THIS CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE.
THEY PICK PEOPLE AT RANDOM.
BUT I'LL LAY EVEN MONEY
THAT GRANDPA LIED. HMM?
SO, CAN RAYANNE
STILL STAY FOR DINNER?
YES. YES.
JUST CHECKING.
DID YOU SEE THAT?
DO YOU HEAR THAT?
"JUST CHECKING."
DID YOU NOTICE THAT TONE
THAT SHE TAKES WITH ME NOW?
I DIDN'T NOTICE ANYTHING.
SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT
BETWEEN HER AND ME.
UH, SHE ACTS SO...
UH, DISTANT, WITH
THIS SORT OF...
SILENT CONTEMPT.
GRAHAM, SHE ADORES YOU,
AND I'VE GOT DIBS ON
HER SILENT CONTEMPT, OK?
Graham: OH, MAN. THIS IS THE
HARDEST HOMEWORK I'VE EVER SEEN.
LOOK AT THIS.
HUH.
I LIKE WHEN YOU DON'T
SHAVE, DADDY. YOU DO?
I LIKE HOW IT FEELS. HEH HEH.
B-B-B!
I CAN'T CONCENTRATE IN HERE.
AH. FINALLY.
I FOUND A COPY OF THE RETURN.
GOT A RAIN GUTTER OUT
THERE ABOUT TO FALL OFF.
THIS JUST IN.
HIT SOMEONE ON THE HEAD,
AND FIRST THING YOU KNOW, YOU'LL
HAVE A LAWSUIT ON YOUR HANDS.
YEAH. WE KNOW, DAD.
HI, GRANDPA.
HELLO, COOKIE.
OH. OK. THAT'S ENOUGH. HEH.
PLACE LIT UP LIKE A CHRISTMAS
TREE. YOU KNOW THAT?
GOT EVERY LIGHT IN
THE HOUSE BLAZING.
TRYING TO SUPPORT THE
ELECTRIC COMPANY SINGLE-HANDED?
DAD, WOULD YOU LIKE
ANYTHING? SOME FRUIT OR...
WELL, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT THERE?
WELL, THIS IS A COPY
OF THE '92 RETURN.
RAN MY OWN
BUSINESS FOR 30 YEARS.
NEVER GOT AUDITED.
DAD, YOU KNOW, THEY
PICK PEOPLE AT RANDOM.
YEAH? NEVER PICKED ME, THEN.
WELL, ANYWAY, THEY DO.
WELL, YOU SEND A
GIRL TO DO A MAN'S JOB...
WHAT'S THAT, CHUCK?
WHAT DID YOU SAY, DAD?
NEVER MIND. IT'S NOT
WORTH REPEATING.
WELL, UM, SO THEY DO SAY
THAT WHEN A SMALL
BUSINESS LIKE US
TAKES A NOTICEABLY
LARGE DEDUCTION
THAT'S HARD TO JUSTIFY...
WHO WOULD DO THAT?
WELL, DAD, LOOK HERE. THE CAR.
SEE, YOU TOOK OFF 87%.
IT WAS A BUSINESS CAR.
I KNOW, BUT THAT'S
THE KIND OF DEDUCTION
THAT YOU HAVE TO BACK
UP WITH A LOG OR SOME...
HEY, THERE'S MY GIRL. DADDY...
HIYA, HONEYBUNCH.
HI, GRANDPA.
HOW ARE YOU? OH... MMM. HEH HEH.
AHH. THIS IS GOOD.
YOU DON'T JUMP ON ME
LIKE YOUR SISTER, DO YOU?
YOU GOT BIG.
YOU'RE A GOOD KID, OK?
JUST GIVE ME THE
WALKMAN, PLEASE.
I... I DON'T HAVE A
WALKMAN. YOU D... ALL RIGHT.
I'LL... I'LL GIVE IT BACK
TO YOU AFTER SCHOOL.
I DON'T... JUST GIVE
ME THE WALKMAN.
CATALANO, GIVE HER
THE STUPID WALKMAN.
GOD, PEOPLE ARE
SO RUDE. HA HA HA!
SO, NOT TO SHOCK YOU,
BUT YOUR DAD'S ATTRACTIVE.
HEH. OH, I'M SURE.
NOT THAT I'D ATTACK
HIM OR ANYTHING,
BUT I WOULDN'T LEAVE
ME ALONE WITH HIM, EITHER.
OH, SO, WHEN I WAS LEAVING,
HE WAS THERE, AND
I WAS LIKE, "WELL, HI,"
AND HE WAS LIKE, "WELL, HI."
AND I WAS LIKE, "WELL, BYE,"
AND HE WAS, LIKE, "WELL..."
IT'S NOT JUST PHYSICAL.
HE... HE'S NICE.
YOU JUST HAVE A REALLY NICE DAD.
HE'S REALLY NICE.
WHEN SOMEONE
COMPLIMENTS YOUR PARENTS,
THERE'S, LIKE, NOTHING TO SAY.
IT'S LIKE A STUN
GUN TO YOUR BRAIN.
UH, PLUS HIS STUBBLE
IS THE PERFECT LENGTH.
HE DOESN'T HAVE STUBBLE.
HE RAN OUT OF DISPOSABLE
RAZORS THAT MORNING.
HE WAS ALL DISTURBED ABOUT IT.
OH, IN TOUCH WITH
HIS EMOTIONS DAD.
SHUT UP!
HA HA HA!
IGNORE ANGELA. SHE
CAN'T HELP HERSELF.
SHE'S THE PRODUCT OF A
TWO-PARENT HOUSEHOLD!
HEH HEH HEH!
Danielle: I KNOW. MY MOM'S BEEN
ON THE PHONE, LIKE, FOREVER.
WE'RE GETTING AUDITED.
I TALKED TO NEIL.
HE SAID, YOU KNOW, WE'RE CRAZY
TO DO THIS WITHOUT
AN ACCOUNTANT.
YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE SHOULDN'T GO INTO A
THING LIKE THIS UNPREPARED,
BUT I KNOW HIM, GRAHAM.
HE'LL NEVER AGREE TO...
HONEY, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT KIND OF TROUBLE
YOUR DAD'S GOTTEN US INTO,
BUT IF THEY FOUND SOMETHING,
WE GOT TO PAY UP,
YOU KNOW? TSK.
WHERE'S ANGELA?
LOCKED IN HER ROOM WITH
THAT RAYANNE PERSON. WHY?
I JUST WONDERED.
SHE HASN'T SAID TWO
WORDS TO ME ALL WEEK.
JOIN THE CLUB.
OH, I ALMOST FORGOT.
WE HAVE A TIME.
ARE YOU LISTENING?
TO MEET WITH THE I.R.S. LADY.
THIS THURSDAY, 4:00.
OH, WELL, THAT WILL
BE EASY TO REMEMBER.
IT'S THE SAME DAY
AS THE CONCERT.
WHAT?
OH, I NEVER MENTIONED
THAT EARL GAVE ME
TWO FREE TICKETS
TO THE DEAD CONCERT.
YOU'RE KIDDING.
OH, HONEY, COME
ON. IT'S THE DEAD.
GRAHAM...
HONEY!
PLEASE, PLEASE TELL ME
THAT YOU ARE NOT GOING
TO TOP OFF OUR AUDIT
WITH A ROCK CONCERT.
PLEASE, GRAHAM.
SO YOU DON'T WANT ME TO GO?
IT'S, UH...
AMBER.
VALLONE.
I'LL GET RAYANNE.
HI, HONEYBUNCH.
RAYANNE, YOUR MOM'S HERE.
I JUST GOT TO FIND MY
SOCK, 'CAUSE IT'S RICKIE'S.
SO, WHICH DAY IS YOUR
MOM GOING TO SEE THE DEAD?
THURSDAY. HER AND HER HONEY.
SHE'D NEVER LET
HIM HIT PITTSBURGH
AND NOT MAKE IT.
AH! YES.
SO, WOULD YOU TWO
LIKE TO GO WITH THEM?
TO SEE THE DEAD?
OH, MY GOD, ANGELA.
BUT WAIT. YOU REALLY WANT TO GO.
NO, I GOT WORK TO DO.
AND ANYWAY, I'M, UH,
TOO OLD FOR THAT STUFF.
HEH HEH. SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WOULD YOU LIKE THAT?
SURE.
THANK YOU! HEH HEH!
I MEAN THANK YOU SO...
NIGHT, ANGE! NIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT.
I KNOW YOU'RE NOT,
UH, WILD ABOUT THE DEAD
LIKE RAYANNE IS, BUT...
NO, IT'S FINE.
SO, WHERE ARE THE TICKETS?
OH.
HERE.
I FOUND ALL THOSE
RECEIPTS I FORGOT I HAD.
ALSO A DIRTY BOOK,
THAT LITTLE PEARL EARRING
I WAS SO UPSET ABOUT,
A BIRTHDAY CARD I NEVER
SENT TO MY MOTHER.
WHAT BOOK? AHEM.
I WANT THAT BACK.
UH, I'VE DECIDED TO
SKIP THE CONCERT.
OHH. THANK GOODNESS.
HEH!
UH... HA HA HA!
UH, YEAH, I GAVE
THE TICKETS TO, UH,
TO ANGELA AND
RAYANNE. HEH HEH HEH.
WHAT?
SERIOUSLY?
OH, YEAH. IT'LL BE FINE.
IT TURNS OUT THAT
RAYANNE'S MOTHER IS GOING.
WELL, OF COURSE
RAYANNE'S MOTHER IS GOING,
AND HEIDI FLEISS IS
PROBABLY MEETING HER THERE,
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
THAT ANGELA SHOULD GO.
PATTY, LISTEN...
AND, TO TOP IT ALL OFF,
IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT!
I MEAN, COULD YOU HAVE HAD
A MORE COMPLETELY TERRIBLE IDEA?
I'LL GET THE TICKETS BACK.
I DIDN'T THINK IT
THROUGH. I WAS...
YOU STILL AWAKE?
JUST MY BRAIN.
I'M SO ASHAMED. I
FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN BAD.
GOVERNMENT'S GOING TO GROUND ME.
ANGELA'S REALLY ACTING
WEIRD TOWARD ME, YOU KNOW?
YOU KNOW, I THINK I'M
GONNA HAVE TO ASK MY DAD
TO BUTT OUT OF THIS.
IT'S LIKE SHE'S HOLDING SOMETHING
AGAINST ME OR SOMETHING.
BUT HOW CAN I DO THAT?
HOW CAN I QUESTION HIS JUDGMENT?
HE... HE BUILT THIS
BUSINESS OUT OF NOTHING.
HE'S THIS RARE INDIVIDUAL...
OH, PATTY. YOU ARE 10 TIMES SMARTER
THAN YOUR DAD IS ABOUT BUSINESS.
TURN THAT OFF. I
CAN'T WATCH THAT GUY.
I MISS JOHNNY.
HEH HEH!
I KNOW.
I FELT FOR JOHNNY,
MARRIED TO ALL THOSE JOANNES.
I THINK OF HIM ALL ALONE
ON SOME GODFORSAKEN
MALIBU BEACH.
NO GUESTS.
GOD, I MISS HIM.
LOOK...
I'LL CALL HIM TOMORROW
AND I'LL TAKE HIM TO LUNCH,
AT THAT NEW PLACE
WITH THE FOUNTAIN,
THAT DOES ALL THE
NONFAT COOKING.
MOM'S BEEN WANTING
ME TO TAKE HIM THERE.
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA. YEAH.
AND IT'LL BE ON MY
TURF AND MY TERMS,
AND I'LL WAIT FOR JUST
THE RIGHT MOMENT,
AND I'LL SAY...
CHILI FRIES?
COME ON. TASTE ONE.
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME
YOU HAD A CHILI FRY?
I COULDN'T SAY.
PROBABLY TASTES
A WHOLE LOT BETTER
THAN THAT PLACE YOU SUGGESTED...
YOU KNOW, WITH THE
NO FAT, NO CHOLESTEROL,
NO FLAVOR. NO, THANK YOU.
DESSERT?
NONE FOR ME.
MELBA, BRING HER A PIECE
OF THAT BANANA CREAM PIE.
DAD, I DON'T WANT ANY PIE.
WELL, I MAY HAVE A LITTLE BITE.
YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED
TO HAVE ANY SUGAR.
IT'S BANANA. IT'S
ALL-NATURAL. OHH.
DAD,
ABOUT THE AUDIT.
UM, I THINK IT'S IMP...
OH. I ALMOST FORGOT.
MY DRIVING LOG.
YOU KEPT A DRIVING LOG?
WELL, YOU SEE IT
THERE, DON'T YOU?
Melba: BANANA CREAM PIE.
DAD.
OHH. YOU KNOW, NOT THAT YOU DID,
BUT THEY CAN TELL IF...
MMM. PATRICIA,
IT'S PERFECTLY LEGAL.
RECONSTRUCTION OF WHAT HAPPENED.
BEST OF MY ABILITY.
I SPOKE TO HER.
TO THE I.R.S. AGENT?
MM-HMM.
DAD, WE AGREED...
SHE HAS NO OBJECTION TO US
DOING THIS WITHOUT AN ACCOUNTANT.
WELL, OF COURSE NOT.
SHE'S PROBABLY THRILLED.
THEY WANT TO TRIP YOU UP.
THEY HAVE GOT ALL
SORTS OF TECHNIQUES.
HEY, I CAN HANDLE THE I.R.S.
WHAT I CAN'T HANDLE
IS MY OWN DAUGHTER
TELLING ME WHAT TO DO.
YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE MISSING.
Girl: AAH! NO! STOP IT!
STOP IT!
GOOD ONE!
STOP!
EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME!
WHOSE CLASSROOM IS THIS?
WHOSE CLASSROOM IS THIS?
MAYHEW'S.
AND WHERE IS MS. MAYHEW?
SHE IS OUT OF HERE.
SHE COULDN'T DEAL.
AREN'T YOU GUIDANCE? UH, YES.
WE NEED GUIDANCE,
MS. KRZYZANOWSKI.
HEY, I HAVE A QUESTION!
OK. ONE AT A TIME. YES.
OK. GIRL... GIRL
WITH THE RED HAIR.
IT'S MS. MAYHEW'S CLASS,
BUT I THINK SHE QUIT.
WHO HAS BEEN
TEACHING THIS CLASS?
UH, MR. RENALDI.
MR. RENALDI'S A SPANISH TEACHER.
THIS IS ENGLISH.
YEAH, RIGHT.
WELL WHAT DID MR. RENALDI DO
THE LAST TIME HE WAS HERE?
HE SHOWED A MOVIE. WHAT MOVIE?
ALIVE.
WHERE IS MR. RENALDI NOW?
HEY, CATALANO. JORDAN.
MR. CATALANO.
JOIN US.
OK. I'M GOING TO PAIR YOU OFF.
AND YOU ARE GOING TO WRITE
THREE SENTENCES ON THE MOVIE ALIVE.
AND YOU ARE GONNA TRADE PAPERS
AND DIAGRAM THOSE SENTENCES.
AND I'M GOING TO
SIT HERE AND WATCH
BECAUSE MY LIFE IS SO EMPTY.
OK. UM, YOU AND YOU,
YOU AND YOU,
YOU AND THE BOY IN BLUE,
AND YOU... THE PINK
SHIRT... YOU AND YOU.
I COULDN'T BELIEVE
THAT JORDAN CATALANO
WAS ACTUALLY TRYING
TO DIAGRAM MY SENTENCES.
HIS SENTENCES WERE REALLY SHORT.
TICKETS.
FOR THE GRATEFUL DEAD CONCERT.
NOT THAT I LIKE THE GRATEFUL
DEAD THAT MUCH, BUT...
YOU KNOW HOW SOMETIMES
THE LAST SENTENCE YOU SAID,
LIKE, ECHOES IN YOUR BRAIN
AND IT JUST KEEPS
SOUNDING STUPIDER?
AND YOU HAVE TO
SAY SOMETHING ELSE
JUST TO MAKE IT STOP.
OH, I JUST REMEMBERED.
I, UM, I OWE YOU $30.
UH, FOR THE I.D.
I DON'T HAVE IT ON ME,
BUT I...
SCALP YOUR DEAD TICKETS.
REALLY?
I DON'T KNOW ANYONE
WHO'D BUY THEM, DO YOU?
YOU SCALPED OUR DEAD
TICKETS? SHH! RAYANNE.
YOU WANT ME TO TALK TO HIM?
UH, MAYBE HE HASN'T SOLD THEM YET.
IT JUST SEEMED... I MEAN,
YOU'RE ALWAYS SAYING WE SHOULD
THINK OF WAYS TO MAKE MONEY.
YOU WANT ME TO? TO TALK TO
HIM? 'CAUSE I'M WILLING TO DO IT.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT MONEY?
WE HAD GRATEFUL DEAD TICKETS.
PEOPLE DON'T SELL
GRATEFUL DEAD TICKETS.
PEOPLE GIVE PEOPLE
GRATEFUL DEAD TICKETS.
I'M SORRY. I JUST... I
DIDN'T THINK IT WAS...
YOUR DAD GAVE THOSE
TICKETS TO BOTH OF US.
INCLUDING ME.
I HAVE TO GO. I GOT
TO GO TO HOME EC.
OH, MY GOD.
SHE MUST REALLY BE UPSET.
WHY'D YOU DO IT?
I MEAN, TO HAVE A REASON
TO TALK TO JORDAN?
NOT COMPLETELY.
THEN WHY?
I DON'T KNOW.
DAD, THE MEETING SHOULD
BE AT THE I.R.S. OFFICE.
YEAH, BUT, YOU DON'T KNOW
THAT SHE HAS AN APPOINTMENT
WITH A CHIROPRACTOR
IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD.
SHE MAY HAVE TOLD YOU THAT
SO SHE CAN GET A GOOD LOOK AT...
WHAT?
OK.
YEAH. SAY GOOD NIGHT TO MOM.
OHH.
I'M SO SCARED.
IT'S OK.
PRISON'S NOT THAT BAD.
AND... AND I'LL WAIT FOR YOU.
NOW HE'S GOT THAT
AGENT COMING HERE.
IT'S EXACTLY WHAT ALL THE BOOKS
SAY NEVER TO DO.
I CAN'T GET HIM TO LISTEN.
PATTY, LISTEN...
YOU ORDER PEOPLE
AROUND ALL DAY LONG...
PEOPLE LIKE ME.
LUNCH WAS A DISASTER.
HE FORCED ME TO ORDER PIE,
AND I ACTUALLY ATE IT.
I MEAN, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
WHY DO I BECOME AN
8-YEAR-OLD AROUND HIM?
OHH.
SO, MY ROTTEN DAY
IS LIKE FOREPLAY?
I LIKE IT WHEN YOU'RE...
WHEN YOU ACTUALLY NEED ME.
OF COURSE I NEED YOU.
DID YOU TALK TO ANGELA
ABOUT THE CONCERT?
UH, I WILL.
I PROMISE.
Danielle: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
GET OUT OF HERE.
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT
I WAS LOOKING FOR...
SOME KIND OF...
PROOF...
SOMETHING THAT WOULD
MAKE IT MAKE SENSE
FOR ME TO HATE HIM.
UM, I... I LOST...
PART OF MY HOMEWORK.
DID YOU FIND IT?
NO.
MISS MANDEVILLE.
MRS. CHASE.
THAT WAS MY GRANDMOTHER'S.
SHE WAS COMPLETELY
DOTTY, OF COURSE. HEH.
IT'S PRACTICALLY WORTHLESS.
KEEPS GOOD TIME, THOUGH.
WELL, THEN IT'S NOT WORTHLESS.
YOU SEE, I WAS THE ONE
WHO ACTUALLY
PREPARED THE RETURN.
UH, MISS MANDEVILLE?
I DON'T KNOW IF YOUR
RECORDS INDICATE THIS,
BUT I AM A VETERAN.
SO...
I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO
CONCEAL ANYTHING, THAT'S ALL.
I WOULD ALSO LIKE
TO ADD THAT, UH,
DURING THE FISCAL
YEAR IN QUESTION,
I WAS FELLED BY A
NEAR-FATAL HEART ATTACK...
AND WAS LATER FOUND TO
BE, UH, SICK WITH DIABETES.
WELL, YOU LOOK JUST FINE NOW.
WELL, I JUST DON'T THINK I SHOULD
BE PENALIZED FOR BOUNCING BACK
LIKE I DID. WHY ARE YOU
TELLING ME THIS, MR. WOOD?
NO REASON.
WE'VE COVERED A LOT OF GROUND.
THANK YOU. THIS
WAS VERY HELPFUL.
UH, YOU CAN KEEP IT IF YOU LIKE.
UH, THAT WON'T BE NECESSARY.
OH, GOD.
I FORGOT TO TALK TO
ANGELA ABOUT THE CONCERT.
ANYWAY, IT'S OBVIOUS
WE'LL BE SEEING
A LOT MORE OF EACH OTHER.
PROMISE ME YOU'LL KEEP
THAT IN MIND, MR. WOOD.
YOU WON'T GO GALLIVANTING OFF
ON SOME CARIBBEAN VACATION.
WHAT?
I HAVE BEEN TO THE
CARIBBEAN EXACTLY ONCE.
IN '56.
YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU
DON'T TAKE LAVISH VACATIONS?
'CAUSE I GOT THE DISTINCT
IMPRESSION THAT YOU...
LAVISH?
MY WIFE WON'T FLY.
SHE GETS SEASICK.
I'VE NEVER BEEN TO EUROPE.
YOU TOLD ME YOURSELF THAT
YOU DO TAKE A LOT OF TIME OFF.
WE HAVE TO. WE HAVE TO GET AWAY.
YOU KNOW, BUT THOSE ARE
MOTORING TRIPS, YOU KNOW.
WE'VE ALWAYS TAKEN THOSE,
YOU KNOW, LIKE
INTO THE MOUNTAINS.
AH. SOUNDS FUN.
UH, WHAT CAR DO YOU USE?
UH, THE WAGON.
UH, I MEAN,
EITHER CAR.
THE COMPACT USUALLY.
OK... HERE IS WHAT
WE'RE GOING TO DO.
LOOK, THIS HAS
NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
WE ARE GOING TO PAY ALL
THE TAXES THAT WE OWE.
PAY WHAT? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?
CHUCK, COME ON.
DADDY, PLEASE. JUST...
JUST WHAT? JUST SIT HERE
AND LET YOU SELL
ME DOWN THE RIVER?
DADDY, I'M TRYING
TO HELP YOU HERE.
HELP ME? I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP.
DO WE HAVE AN AGREEMENT?
WE ABSOLUTELY HAVE AN AGREEMENT.
AGREEMENT?
WHO THE HELL ARE YOU
TO MAKE AN AGREEMENT?
HEY. DADDY, PLEASE.
CHUCK, COME ON.
DO WHAT YOU WANT.
I DON'T GIVE A DAMN.
THANK YOU.
YOU HAVE BEEN VERY PATIENT.
I'M, UH, SORRY THAT, UH...
ANGELA? I HAVE TO...
UH, DAD, I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW.
ANGELA.
UM, I'M JUST SORRY YOU
HAD TO WITNESS THAT, UH,
BUSINESS BETWEEN
ME AND MY FATHER.
SMALL POTATOES
COMPARED TO WHAT I'VE SEEN.
WE'VE GOT A PROBLEM.
IT'S MY MISTAKE.
I SHOULD HAVE TALKED
TO YOUR MOTHER FIRST.
THE THING IS, I CAN'T ALLOW YOU
TO GO TO THAT CONCERT TONIGHT.
WHAT? THE THING IS,
YOUR MOTHER IS JUST
NOT COMFORTABLE WITH IT.
SO, I'M SORRY.
UM, YOU BETTER GIVE
THE TICKETS BACK.
WHY DO YOU NEED THE TICKETS?
WELL, WHY DO YOU NEED
THEM IF YOU'RE NOT GOING?
JUST GIVE THEM BACK.
RAYANNE HAS THEM,
AND SHE'S GOING TO
BE HERE ANY SECOND.
LOOK, I'M SORRY. NO, I'M SORRY!
I MEAN, SHE'S GONNA... SHE'S
COUNTING ON ME TO COME.
AND I'M NOT GONNA
DO THIS TO HER.
ANGELA, LOOK. LET ME...
LET ME CALL RAYANNE.
I WILL EXPLAIN IT TO HER.
IT WAS YOUR IDEA.
I MADE... I MADE A
MISTAKE. I'M NOT PERFECT.
OH, BELIEVE ME, THAT'S
BECOME REALLY CLEAR.
THERE SHE IS.
ANGELA. ANG...
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
SHE GET INTO RAYANNE'S CAR?
SHE'S GONE.
I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT
YOU LET THIS GO THIS LONG.
PATTY, I FORGOT. ALL RIGHT?
OH, COME ON. WHY
DON'T YOU JUST ADMIT IT?
YOU WANT HER TO GO
TO THIS STUPID CONCERT.
ALL RIGHT! I ADMIT IT, OK?
LOOK, I SAW THE GRATEFUL
DEAD WHEN I WAS 15 YEARS OLD.
IT WAS ONE OF THE EIGHT
BEST NIGHTS OF MY LIFE.
OH... IT WAS SOMETHING
I WANTED TO GIVE HER.
OH, FINE. LEAVE.
JUST LIKE HE DOES.
YOU LEAVE MY FATHER OUT OF THIS.
WHAT? WHAT DID YOU SAY?
IT'S NOT WORTH REPEATING.
Woman: AND BRIAN, MAKE
SURE THE LID'S ON TIGHT.
HI.
UM,
IT... IT WASN'T LOCKED,
AND... I... I CAN'T GO
HOME RIGHT NOW.
AND THERE'S NOWHERE ELSE
TO GO, AND F... I'M FREEZING.
ARE YOU, LIKE, MEETING
SOMEONE IN HERE?
THAT'S SO UNFUNNY.
WHAT ABOUT...
MY ROOM?
WHAT ABOUT YOUR PARENTS?
THEY WON'T EVEN NOTICE.
THEY'RE BALANCING
THEIR JOINT CHECKING.
AHEM. MINE ARE GETTING AUDITED.
MINE ARE PROBABLY
GETTING A CITATION FOR, LIKE,
BEST PENMANSHIP ON A
TAX RETURN OR SOMETHING.
CAN I JUST STAY HERE,
JUST FOR A WHILE?
HOW COME YOU CAN'T GO HOME?
MM.
MY DAD THINKS I'M AT A
GRATEFUL DEAD CONCERT,
AND HE'D BE REALLY
UPSET IF HE KNEW I WASN'T.
WOW.
YOUR DAD IS SO
DIFFERENT FROM MY DAD.
LOOK, IT'S MY CAR.
I THINK I HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW.
DOES THIS INVOLVE
JORDAN CATALANO?
OHH.
ANGELA, WAIT.
DID YOU EVER THINK THAT I COULD
ACTUALLY BE DOING SOMETHING
THAT DOES NOT INVOLVE YOU?
I MEAN, THAT I MAY NOT
JUST BE SITTING AROUND
IN CASE YOU DECIDE, LIKE, THAT
MOMENT THAT YOU NEED MY CAR?
SO, WHAT WERE YOU DOING?
NOTHING.
YOU WANT MY SWEATER?
OK.
HERE.
JUST TRY NOT TO SWEAT INTO IT.
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO
SAY THINGS LIKE THAT?
WHY DO YOU HAVE...
Woman: BRIAN, THERE'S
ANOTHER BAG OF GARBAGE HERE!
I KNOW.
TONIGHT, BRIAN! NOT NEXT WEEK.
WHAT'S REALLY HORRIBLE
IS BEING A WITNESS
WHILE SOMEONE'S PARENTS
ORDERS THEM AROUND.
IT RUINS THE CONVERSATION.
BRIAN?
SO, WAIT. WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
NOTHING. JUST...
YOU SHOULDN'T ACT ONE
WAY TOWARDS A PERSON
WHEN YOU NEED
SOMETHING, AND THEN...
DANNI, JUICE?
EW, NOT THE PULP KIND.
OH. RIGHT.
I'LL TAKE SOME.
YOU LEFT YOUR, UH, SCOTTIE
SWEATER IN MY CAR, HONEYBUNCH.
OH, THANKS. I WAS SEARCHING.
ANGELA,
ORANGE JUICE DOESN'T
GROW ON TREES.
IT SORT OF DOES.
DID YOU SEE HOW HE'S BEING?
DON'T CALL YOUR FATHER "HE."
MOM, HE DIDN'T WANT ME
TO GO TO THE CONCERT,
SO, FINE. I DIDN'T GO.
UH, BUT YOU LET HIM
THINK YOU WERE GOING.
YOU SOLD TICKETS YOU
HAD NO BUSINESS SELLING,
AND YOU WERE LESS
THAN FORTHRIGHT,
TO SAY THE LEAST.
THEN WHY CAN'T HE JUST SAY THAT
INSTEAD OF ACTING
LIKE I DON'T EXIST?
DAD NOT EVEN
WANTING TO LOOK AT ME
IS, LIKE, THE WORST FEELING.
I KNOW.
Angela: RAYANNE! RICKIE!
Rayanne: IT WAS SO
BEYOND. OH, MY GOD. HEH.
FINALLY. I'VE BEEN LOOKING
EVERYWHERE FOR YOU GUYS.
ANYWAY, UM, SO, I'LL
SEE YOU AT LUNCH.
I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE'S THIS MAD.
I KNOW. BUT, SEE, I CAN
SEE IT FROM YOUR SIDE.
BUT I ALSO SEE IT FROM HER SIDE
AND FROM MY OWN SIDE. HEH.
I DON'T REALLY HAVE A SIDE.
ANYWAY, WHY'D YOU DO IT?
I MEAN, WERE YOU
MAD AT YOUR DAD?
WHAT? WHO SAID THAT?
WELL, WITH MY DAD,
WHO'S TECHNICALLY MY UNCLE,
BUT HE RAISED ME,
I MEAN, IF HE GIVES ME SOMETHING
AND I'M MAD AT HIM,
I CAN'T OPEN IT.
BUT THAT'S DIFFERENT 'CAUSE...
I'M SOMEWHAT AFRAID OF MY DAD.
I MEAN, IN THE PAST,
MY DAD HAS BROKEN DOWN MY DOOR.
MY DAD ALWAYS KNOCKS.
I HAD A FEELING.
OHH.
OH, THAT'S NICE.
SO, UM, WHAT DID
HE SAY? I DON'T KNOW.
REALLY? MM-HMM.
BUT HE WASN'T MAD
ABOUT THE DEAD?
HE GROUNDED ME.
NO, REALLY?
GIVE ME A DRAG.
RAYANNE?
RAYANNE, I FEEL TERRIBLE, OK?
AND I HAVE TO GO TO
HEALTH IN A FEW MINUTES.
WHY?
WHY DO I FEEL TERRIBLE?
YEAH.
BECAUSE...
OF WHAT I DID.
THAT YOU DIDN'T GET
TO GO TO THE CONCERT.
NO, I DID. IT WAS GREAT.
THEY PLAYED STAGGER LEE.
AMBER AND RUSTY TOOK ME.
RUSTY RAN INTO THIS GUY
HE KNEW FROM VIETNAM
WHO'S IN A WHEELCHAIR.
HE HAD AN EXTRA TICKET.
HE HAD A SEXY UPPER BOD, TOO.
OHH.
MAKING YOU FEEL BAD IS TOO EASY.
IT TAKES ALL THE FUN OUT OF IT.
LOOK, YOUR DAD PROBABLY
GIVES YOU STUFF ALL THE TIME.
SO, IT'S NO BIG DEAL TO YOU.
BUT TO ME...
THE FACT THAT HE DID THAT...
FACE IT. I'M ENVIOUS.
I'M A GREEN-EYED MONSTER.
YOU DON'T KNOW
EVERYTHING ABOUT MY DAD.
REMEMBER THE NIGHT WE
COULDN'T GET INTO LET'S BOLT?
I SAW HIM AROUND THE
CORNER FROM OUR HOUSE,
AND HE WAS TALKING TO THIS GIRL,
LIKE, IN HER TWENTIES.
SO?
SO...
I'M LUCKY.
MY DAD'S HAD, LIKE, EIGHT
DIFFERENT GIRLFRIENDS
SINCE HE LEFT. SO...
I'M USED TO IT.
BUT, ANGELA,
WHATEVER YOUR DAD MAY BE DOING,
WITH WHATEVER GIRL...
AND YOU DON'T
EVEN KNOW IF HE IS...
HE'S STILL THE TYPE OF DAD
THAT WOULD LAY TWO
DEAD TICKETS ON YOU...
OUT OF NOWHERE.
HEH.
THAT'S WHAT MATTERS.
DADDY?
HUH?
I'M SORRY. I DIDN'T MEAN TO...
PATRICIA, YOU WANT TO GIVE
ME ANOTHER HEART ATTACK?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
WORKING SO LATE?
WHAT'S ALL THIS?
THAT'S MY MASTER PLAN, DAD.
I WANT WOOD & JONES PRINTERS
TO MOVE INTO THE WORLD
OF HIGH-SPEED COPIERS.
DID YOU READ IT?
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
WELL, IT'S AN AWFUL LOT OF
MONEY TO SPEND IN ONE FELL SWOOP.
YOU KNOW, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I
THOUGHT, DAD. AND THEN IT CAME TO ME...
LEASE IT.
I MEAN, THAT WAY IT ONLY
COSTS ABOUT 8 GRAND A MONTH.
WELL, YEAH, I KNOW THAT'S...
THAT'S NOT PEANUTS, BUT, OH, DAD,
IT LOOKS LIKE OFFSET.
PEOPLE WON'T HAVE TO GO TO AN
OFFSET PRINTER. THEY CAN COME TO US.
WE CAN KEEP MORE STUFF IN-HOUSE.
WELL, I SEE YOU GOT
IT ALL FIGURED OUT.
HEH.
YOU KNOW, I COULD
WORK 16 HOURS A DAY,
AND IT WOULDN'T BE ENOUGH.
YOU KNOW HOW LATE I WORK.
I KNOW YOU CAME HERE
TO MAKE UP WITH ME.
ME? HUH.
I'M STILL WAITING
FOR AN APOLOGY.
WELL, YOU'LL BE WAITING A WHILE.
DAD, I HAVE OPINIONS.
I HAVE TO HAVE THEM,
AND STICK TO THEM,
MAKE DECISIONS.
I HAVE TO.
YOU ASKED ME TO
WHEN YOU ASKED ME...
I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO BANK...
NO, DAD, YOU HAVE TO HEAR THIS!
WHEN YOU ASKED ME TO TAKE OVER,
WHEN YOU ASKED ME
TO RUN THIS BUSINESS,
MAYBE YOU DIDN'T KNOW
WHAT YOU WERE ASKING.
GOD KNOWS I DIDN'T.
AND SOMETIMES I MISS HOW
IT USED TO BE WHEN I NEVER...
QUESTIONED YOU.
BUT I'VE... I'VE TURNED SOME
SORT OF CORNER WITH THIS,
AND... AND I CAN'T GO BACK.
YEAH, WELL, THAT'S YOUR...
THAT'S YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
SO... WHY DOES THERE HAVE TO BE
THIS DISTANCE BETWEEN US?
WELL, THAT'S NOT MY DOING.
ALL RIGHT NOW.
UM, IT'S ALL RIGHT.
CAREFUL, I... I
DIDN'T SHAVE TODAY.
DIDN'T HAVE TO.
THAT'S THE GOOD THING
ABOUT RETIREMENT.
I DON'T CARE.
WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE GIRL,
I'D GO TO GIVE YOU
A KISS GOOD NIGHT.
BOY, IF I HADN'T SHAVED,
YOU'D PUSH ME AWAY.
YOU SAID MY WHISKERS
WERE TOO ROUGH.
WELL, THEY WERE THEN.
THAT'S WHAT IT IS
TO RAISE A GIRL...
WALKING ON EGGSHELLS
HALF THE TIME.
YOU HUNGRY?
COME ON, I'LL BUY
YOU A PIECE OF PIE.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
ASLEEP HOURS AGO.
SO, IT SEEMS THAT THE
BREAKUP OF THE BEATLES
HAD LESS TO DO WITH YOKO ONO
AND MORE TO DO WITH THE FACT
THAT PAUL WANTED LINDA'S FATHER
TO BE THEIR NEW
BUSINESS MANAGER.
WHY DO YOU THINK PEOPLE
GIVE HER SUCH A HARD TIME?
IS IT JUST BECAUSE
SHE CAN'T SING?
I'VE WORKED SO HARD...
TO PLEASE HIM, YOU KNOW?
HE DOESN'T REALIZE...
WHAT THIS ALL COSTS ME. HE...
HE'S NEVER REALLY
KNOWN WHAT I'M WORTH.
YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES I THINK
THAT I PARTLY MARRIED
YOU BECAUSE I KNEW...
KNEW WHAT?
THAT YOU'D BE A
REALLY GOOD FATHER.
A DIFFERENT KIND OF FATHER.
AND YOU ARE.
GRAHAM.
LISTEN TO ME.
I... I DON'T WANT TO LOSE HER.
YEAH, BUT YOU HAVE TO,
JUST FOR A LITTLE WHILE.
YOU HAVE TO LET
HER PUSH YOU AWAY
AND NOT PUNISH HER FOR IT.
ALL SHE'S DOING IS PUSHING
YOU OFF YOUR PEDESTAL.
AND SHE'S RIGHT TO DO
THAT. SHE HAS TO DO IT.
SHE'S RIGHT ON SCHEDULE.
SHE'S NOT 1,000 YEARS LATE,
LIKE I AM.
SO... SO, UM, WHAT DO I DO? HEH.
STAND YOUR GROUND.
YOU LET HER KNOW THAT
NO MATTER HOW HARD
SHE PUSHES YOU AWAY,
YOU'LL STILL BE THERE.
I LOVE YOU.
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
SO MUCH.
♪ I TOLD ALTHEA ♪
♪ I WAS FEELIN' LOST ♪
♪ LACKIN' IN SOME DIRECTION ♪
♪ ALTHEA TOLD ME ♪
♪ UPON SCRUTINY ♪
♪ THAT MY BACK MIGHT ♪
HEY!
♪ NEED PROTECTION... ♪
HEY!
HEY, WANT TO GIVE
ME A HAND WITH THIS?
WANT TO GIVE ME A HAND?
FOR A SECOND! GIVE ME A HAND.
THIS. WANNA...
COME OVER HERE... FOR A SECOND.
GIVE ME A HAND.
GEE, THANKS. WELL, I'D...
I'D LIKE TO HELP YOU, SIR,
BUT I'M TOO BUSY PICTURING
YOUR DAUGHTER NAKED.
TAKE THAT OUT TO YOUR FATHER.
MOM SAID I SHOULD
BRING THIS TO YOU.
JUST PUT IT DOWN THERE.
HEY, GIVE ME A HAND WITH THIS.
NOW?
YEAH. NOW.
COME UP HERE AND, UH,
HOLD THIS IN PLACE, PLEASE.
HEY, YOU WANT TO USE THIS THING?
WORK OUT A LITTLE OF
THAT PENT-UP ANGER?
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT'S ANGRY.
♪ OR JUST ANOTHER
PRETTY FACE... ♪
SO, TELL ME, UM...
WHAT'D YOU GET FOR THE TICKETS?
ALTOGETHER, 120,
BUT, UM, I OWED THIS GUY $30.
REALLY? AND WHY IS THAT?
DAD, I CAN'T GET INTO IT.
IT'S TOO...
STUPID AND COMPLICATED.
♪ SELF-CENTERED... ♪
SO THAT LEAVES $90 PROFIT.
WELL, YOU BETTER
DECLARE THAT AS INCOME.
DECLARE IT TO WHO? TO ME.
YOU GET MY POINT?
SO, RAYANNE SAID THE
CONCERT WAS REALLY GOOD.
CAN I TURN THIS OFF?
UNH.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU LIKE
LISTENING TO THESE DAYS?
I DON'T KNOW. UM...
SMASHING PUMPKINS,
RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE,
PORNO FOR PYROS. OH, YEAH, YEAH.
I LOVE THEIR CHRISTMAS ALBUM.
HEH.
UM...
STONE TEMPLE PILOTS,
UH, I LIKE BILLIE HOLIDAY.
WAIT, WAIT. YOU
LIKE BILLIE HOLIDAY?
YEAH.
♪ AND DANCE ♪
♪ BY THE LIGHT OF THE MOON ♪