My So-Called Life (1994–1995): Season 1, Episode 2 - Dancing in the Dark - full transcript

Rayanne arranges for Angela and Jordan to meet under the pretense of Jordan selling Angela a fake ID. Meanwhile, Angela's parents take ballroom dancing lessons.

Girl: ♪ GO NOW... GO! ♪

♪ AHH ♪

♪ AHH ♪

♪ AHH ♪

♪ HEY ♪

♪ HEY ♪

♪ AHH ♪

♪ HEY ♪

Film narrator: TO JOURNEY
BEYOND THE REACHES

OF OUR SOLAR SYSTEM
TO THE CLOSEST STAR

WOULD MEAN
TRAVELING THE DISTANCE



OF MORE THAN 5 TRILLION MILES.

YET THE DIMENSIONS OF THE COSMOS

ARE SO UNIMAGINABLY VAST,

UNITS OF MEASUREMENT
BECOME VIRTUALLY...

Angela: I'VE BEEN
KISSED THREE TIMES.

NO, FOUR TIMES.

NO, THREE TIMES.

ALL OF THEM WERE
PEOPLE I NEVER SAW AGAIN,

WHICH I HOPE DOESN'T,
LIKE, MEAN SOMETHING.

ONE WAS THIS COUNSELOR
AT THIS YMCA CAMP.

EXCEPT HE ALREADY
HAD A GIRLFRIEND.

Film narrator:
ENORMOUS PRESSURE.

THE INNER CORE OF THE STAR

NOW IMPLODES VIOLENTLY,



PRODUCING AN EXPLOSION
OF UNPARALLELED INTENSITY.

Angela: ONE WAS THIS USHER

AT MY MOTHER'S COUSIN'S
WEDDING TWO YEARS AGO.

THE WEDDING WAS IN MILWAUKEE.

WE STAYED OVER AT A MOTOR
LODGE WITH A HEATED POOL.

IT WAS A DOUBLE-RING CEREMONY.

HE WAS STARING AT ME ALL
THROUGH THE CEREMONY.

HEH HEH HEH.

LATER...

I FOUND OUT HE ONLY KISSED ME

'CAUSE HE HAD LOST A BET.

THE THIRD KISS IS THE
HARDEST TO DESCRIBE.

IT WAS THIS GUY I
MET ON THE BEACH

LAST SUMMER.

IT WAS LABOR DAY.

IT WAS THE DAY I
SWAM OUT TOO FAR.

THAT WAS THE MOST...

EXCITING ONE.

EXCEPT IT MAY NOT
COUNT AS AN ACTUAL KISS...

SINCE I WAS KIND OF...

UNCONSCIOUS.

I'VE NEVER HAD AN
ACTUAL BOYFRIEND.

I DON'T KNOW IF
THAT'S NORMAL OR NOT.

YOU KNOW THAT GIRL DAYNA?

DAYNA ODENKIRK?

DAYNA. SHE'S GOT... HEY.

SHE'S GOT HAIR TAILS

AND THREE LITTLE
STUDS IN EACH EAR.

SHE USED TO WEAR EYELINER
POINTY LIKE CATWOMAN.

NOW SHE WEARS IT SMUDGED.

AND HER FEET ARE
THE PERFECT KIND...

THEY'RE SMALL WITH
A REALLY HIGH ARCH.

SO, WHAT ABOUT HER?

NOTHING. SHE JUST ANNOYS ME.

HER LIPS ARE SO PUFFED OUT,

IT'S LIKE SHE SILICONED THEM.

REALLY?

YOU THINK SHE DID?

REALLY? YOU THINK
SHE SILICONED HER LIPS?

REALLY?

ANGELA, HE'S GONE.

YOU CAN TALK LIKE
A NORMAL PERSON.

OH, GOD.

YOU HAVE GOT TO PROGRESS
TO THE NEXT PHASE OF THIS.

I MEAN, THINK OF RICKIE AND ME.

HOW MUCH MORE CAN WE TAKE?

I JUST DON'T WANT TO LOOK
LIKE I'M THROWING MYSELF AT HIM.

EXCUSE ME.

PEOPLE THROWING
THEMSELVES AT PEOPLE

IS LIKE THE BASIS
OF CIVILIZATION.

SHE HAS A POINT.

IF JORDAN CATALANO
IS, LIKE, NEARBY,

MY ENTIRE BODY KNOWS IT,

LIKE ONE OF THOSE
DOGS THAT POINT?

I'LL KEEP TALKING AND STUFF,

BUT MY MIND WON'T EVEN
KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.

I KEEP WONDERING IF
THERE'S, LIKE, A TERM FOR THIS.

OK. NOW, BEFORE WE
CUT OUR HEARTS OPEN...

Students: UGH. SICK. YECCH.

PEOPLE,

IT'S A PIG HEART.

STUDENTS OPPOSED TO
THE PRACTICE OF VIVISECTION

MAY DO RESEARCH AT
THE LIBRARY INSTEAD,

BUT YOU MUST PUT
THIS BELIEF IN WRITING.

NOW TO REVIEW.

AN EXPERIMENT MUST TEST A WHAT?

A HYPOTHESIS.

AND A HYPOTHESIS
CONSISTS OF SEVERAL...

ANYBODY?

SEVERAL ASSUMPTIONS.

AND TRUE EXPERIMENTATION
DEPENDS UPON...

GUYS, PRECISION,

OBSERVATION,

AND CLEAR, CONCISE
COMMUNICATION.

WHAT?

I SAID I'M LEAVING NOW,

SO I GUESS I DON'T
RATE A KISS GOODBYE.

WAIT. WHAT?

NOTHING. IT'S...

JUST YOU DON'T KISS ME GOODBYE
IN THE MORNINGS ANYMORE.

PATTY, WE'LL BE SEEING
EACH OTHER IN 40 MINUTES.

YEAH, I KNOW, BUT JUST BECAUSE
WE'RE WORKING TOGETHER NOW,

THAT'S NO REASON TO STOP...
I MEAN, THIS ISN'T THE TIME

TO... START ANYTHING.

OHH, I'M SORRY.

I FORGOT. A KISS MUST
RESULT IN INTERCOURSE.

WELL, IT'S A LAW IN THIS STATE.

THERE COULD BE NO
KISSING FOR KISSING'S SAKE.

A KISS MUST LEAD SOMEWHERE.

WHERE DID THEY
DRILL THAT INTO YOU?

WAS IT SHOP CLASS?

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

I SWORE I WOULD NEVER
FIGHT WITH YOU AGAIN

THIS EARLY IN THE MORNING.

THIS ISN'T A FIGHT.
IT'S GOODBYE.

WHAT ARE THE ELEMENTS
OF A TRUE EXPERIMENT?

AND WHAT SORT OF
ACTIVITY IS AN EXPERIMENT?

IT'S A PURPOSEFUL ACTIVITY

DESIGNED TO SOLVE A WHAT?

A PARTICULAR PROBLEM.

HOW MUCH MONEY DID YOU LOSE?

Girl: WHOO! YEAH!

NONE.

SO...

CATALANO,

SO, TINO SAYS YOU CAN
GET MY GIRLFRIEND A FAKE I.D.

SO?

SO COULD TINO.

OH, YEAH, WELL.

SO, YEAH. HE DOES
ME SO MANY FAVORS

I FEEL LIKE I'M
WEARING HIM THIN.

THE KIND WITH THAT
OUT-OF-STATE LOOK,

LIKE FROM, UH,
GEORGIA OR SOMETHING?

MY GIRLFRIEND REALLY NEEDS ONE.

ANGELA.

IT'S LIKE AN EMERGENCY.

WHY DOESN'T SHE ASK FOR HERSELF?

WELL, THAT'S A LONG STORY.

SHE'S, UH...

FRENCH.

SHE'S FROM FRANCE.

GET OUT OF HERE.

SERIOUSLY. AND
WITH CERTAIN WORDS,

SHE'LL, LIKE...

FORGET HOW TO PRONOUNCE
THEM OR SOMETHING.

IT'S LIKE A MENTAL
BLOCK TYPE OF THING.

THAT GIRL I SEE YOU WITH...

ANGELA. CHASE.

IS... FRENCH.

WELL, SHE WAS BORN THERE.

I MEAN, SHE HASN'T LIVED
THERE IN QUITE A WHILE.

AND SHE'S A U.S.
CITIZEN AND ALL.

WHAT KIND OF I.D.?

OK, IMPORTANT.

I NEED TO SEE THE HANDS

OF THOSE HANDING IN THEIR
EXTRA-CREDIT EXPERIMENTS

ON FRIDAY.

OK.

UH...

JUSTIN...

SONYA...

Angela.

Angela! MICHAEL...

UH, MICHAEL, ARE YOU AND SONYA

WORKING TOGETHER? NO. Come here.

NO?

OK, SO THAT'S...

UH, JEREMY...

CHARLOTTE...

TIFFANY.

OK.

SEAN...

YVETTE...

LEANDER.

OK, SHARON...

SHANE, AND, UH...

BRIAN?

WHAT HAPPENED TO
YOUR LAB PARTNER?

SHE ALMOST FAINTED, SO...

OHH.

OH.

UM, AND YOUR
EXTRA-CREDIT PROJECT IS?

UM, CONTROLLED
RELEASE OF ENERGY,

CONSTRUCTION AND
USE OF A VOLUMETER.

IS THAT SOMETHING YOU WORKED
ON ALONE OR WITH ANGELA?

WITH ANGELA.

OK, PEOPLE,

UM, YOUR HEARTS MUST
BE CLEARLY LABELED

BEFORE RETURNING
THEM TO THE CART.

UM, PLEASE DO NOT DRIP.

Ms. Chavatal: UH, I
THINK THAT'S GREAT.

WHAT?

LIKE ANGELA REALLY HELPED
YOU WITH YOUR VOLUMETER?

SHE'S PLANNING TO.

LOOK... LOOK, I MEAN,

WHY WOULD I SAY IT
IF IT WASN'T TRUE? UH...

WHY WOULD YOU SAY SHE WAS
FAINTING? OK, WHAT WAS THAT?

I MEAN, SOME OF US
ACTUALLY WORK, YOU KNOW?

WE DON'T JUST
EXPECT EXTRA CREDIT

BECAUSE... BECAUSE
OUR LAB PARTNER'S SMART.

SHE TAKES ADVANTAGE OF YOU,

AND YOU TOTALLY LET HER.

I PITY YOU.

OH, MY GOD.

HEY, I DID IT FOR YOU.

IT'S A GOOD THING.

IT'S A DEFINITE GOOD THING.

WAIT. YOU WERE THERE, TOO?

WELL, NO,

BUT SHE TOLD ME THE WHOLE THING.

I BET PEOPLE CAN ACTUALLY
DIE OF EMBARRASSMENT.

I BET IT'S BEEN
MEDICALLY PROVEN.

HEY, WORST CASE...

YOU GET AN OUT-OF-STATE I.D.,

WHICH YOU NEED ANYWAY.

JUST WAIT.

TELL ME EVERYTHING HE SAID.

YOU WILL DEFINITELY THANK ME.

IT'S TRUE. I MEAN,

FROM WHAT SHE TOLD ME,

WHICH WAS EVERYTHING.

IN FACT, YOU SHOULD BE
THANKING ME RIGHT NOW.

GOD. LET'S STOP
TALKING ABOUT THIS.

OK.

SO...

HOW DID HE ACT?

DID HE ACT BORED OR...

HE FLOPPED ON THE FLOOR.

UNCONTROLLABLY, OK?

RICKIE HAD TO HOLD
DOWN HIS TONGUE.

AND I WASN'T EVEN THERE.

HA HA! HA HA!

Brian: HEY, CHASE.

WHAT I, LIKE, DREAD

IS WHEN PEOPLE WHO KNOW YOU

IN COMPLETELY DIFFERENT WAYS

END UP IN THE SAME AREA.

THANKS FOR LEAVING ME YOUR
WHOLE HEART TO CLEAN UP.

YOU HAVE TO DEVELOP
THIS, LIKE, COMBINATION YOU

ON THE SPOT.

SO, CHAVATAL, SHE THINKS
WE'RE BOTH WORKING

ON MY VOLUMETER.

HIS WHAT?

IT'S THIS EXPERIMENT.

THERE'S, LIKE, A MOUSE INVOLVED.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME AGAIN?

SO, YOU THINK THAT'S FAIR?

I MEAN, I DO ALL THE
WORK AND... AND YOU JUST...

I NEVER SAID I WAS DOING IT.

WELL, SHE'S GIVING
YOU CREDIT, SO...

LOOK, I ALREADY EXECUTED

THE ENTIRE APPARATUS.

THE APPARATUS.

SO, I THINK THE LEAST YOU CAN DO

IS JUST HELP ME WORK ON IT.

TOMORROW NIGHT.

BECAUSE...

HE WANTS YOU TO
WORK ON HIS APPARATUS.

JUST SHUT UP! OK?

WHAT WOULD YOUR PARENTS SAY?

MY PARENTS ARE OUT
OF TOWN! WHICH HAS...

WHICH HAS NOTHING TO D...

SHE'LL BE THERE.

RAYANNE!

WHAT?

RAYANNE.

IT'S PERFECT.

AS WHAT?

EXCUSE ME, WHAT IS A VOLUMETER?

AS A PLACE TO BRING
JORDAN CATALANO.

ARE YOU CRAZY?

WERE YOU RAISED
IN A SATANIC CULT?

SHE WISHES.

JORDAN CATALANO?

AT BRIAN KRAKOW'S HOUSE?

IT'S, LIKE, AGAINST
NATURE OR SOMETHING.

SO?

CHASE, YOU GOING
TO HELP ME OR NOT?

YES OR NO?

OH, GOD.

YES.

SO THE PLAN IS...

WAIT. WHAT'S THE PLAN?

YOU ARE GOING TO SO
LOVE HAVING A FAKE I.D.

I, LIKE, COLLECT
THEM. I'M ADDICTED.

OK, THE PLAN.

YOU GO TO WHAT'S-HIS-NAME'S

AND YOU HELP HIM WITH HIS, UH...

VOLUME THING.

RIGHT. MEANWHILE, RICKIE AND I

AND JORDAN CATALANO

WILL PROCURE YOU AN I.D.

WHICH WE WILL THEN BRING
BACK TO WHAT'S-HIS-NAME'S.

WHERE YOU AND JORDAN CATALANO

WILL THEN BE.

BUT, OK, IN MY HUMBLE OPINION,

HE'S JORDAN CATALANO.

HE'S NOT GONNA DO ANY OF THIS.

SHARON REFUSES TO COME IN.

OK.

WHAT'S THE DEAL?

YOU TELL ME.

ALL SHARON WILL SAY

IS THAT, UM, ANGELA
HAD BEEN ACTING DISTANT,

SO THEN, SHE CALLED HER ON
IT IN THE GIRLS' ROOM ONE DAY,

AND, UH, THEY BOTH CRIED.

EVER SINCE THEN, THEY'VE
KIND OF AVOIDED EACH OTHER,

AND THAT'S ALL I KNOW.

IT'S A MINISERIES
COMPARED TO WHAT I KNOW.

HEY, CHERSKI.

SO, BY THE WAY,

CHASE IS COMING OVER
TOMORROW NIGHT...

TO...

YOU KNOW...

COMPILE DATA.

SO?

SO...

SHE'S COMING OVER.

SO... TO HELP ME,

SO THAT OBVIOUSLY PROVES THAT...

WHAT?

THAT YOU WERE OBVIOUSLY WRONG

ABOUT THE WHOLE SITUATION.

RIGHT.

I WAS WRONG, KRAKOW.

JUST KEEP TELLING YOURSELF THAT.

REMEMBER WHEN WE
STOPPED SPEAKING?

YES...

'CAUSE YOU TOLD EVERYBODY

THAT I MADE OUT WITH
MITCHELL MOSCARELLI

BEHIND THE DUCK POND.

WELL, YOU DID MAKE OUT
WITH MITCHELL MOSCARELLI.

BUT NOT BEHIND THE DUCK POND.

HEH. HEH.

THANKS.

I DON'T KNOW. I'LL PROBABLY
JUST PUT THIS IN MY CLOSET.

SHOULD I CUT MY HAIR SHORT?

I CAN'T TAKE THIS.

I FEEL SICK.

LOOK, I WAS THERE.

AND I WAS PRACTICALLY THERE

FROM HEARING IT SO MANY TIMES.

AND HE IS DEFINITELY
SEMI-INTERESTED.

SO YOU THINK HE...

I THINK PART OF HIM

IS PARTLY INTERESTED IN YOU.

DEFINITELY.

BUT, I MEAN,

HE'S GOT OTHER
THINGS ON HIS MIND.

BUT THAT'S THE PART
THAT'S SO UNFAIR.

I HAVE NOTHING ELSE ON MY MIND.

HOW COME I HAVE TO BE THE ONE
SITTING AROUND ANALYZING HIM

IN, LIKE, MICROSCOPIC DETAIL

AND HE GETS TO BE THE ONE
WITH OTHER THINGS ON HIS MIND?

THAT...

IS DEEP.

IT'S THIS WORKING TOGETHER.

IT'S PUSHING US APART.

GOD, THAT SOUNDS
LIKE A REDBOOK ARTICLE.

LISTEN...

IF YOU GOT TO CUT IT,

CUT IT.

YOU KNOW?

BUT LET'S FACE IT.

MEN LIKE LONG HAIR.

WHO CARES WHAT THEY LIKE?

BUT THEY SUPPOSEDLY
LIKE VARIETY, DON'T THEY?

THEY LIKE LONG HAIR,

AND THEY LIKE FOR
YOU TO WEAR RED.

YEAH, BUT DON'T THEY
SUPPOSEDLY LIKE IT

IF YOU SHOW UP
LOOKING DIFFERENT? OHH.

OH, GOD. SHOOT ME, WILL YOU?

LOOK.

YOUR CINDERELLA.

I REMEMBER WHEN
YOUR DAD GAVE YOU THIS.

I WAS SO JEALOUS.

I WAS 12...

AND YOU WERE 11.

AND I WORE MY HAIR
EXACTLY LIKE THIS.

LOOK, THEY SAY IF YOU
WANT TO PUT THE ROMANCE

BACK IN YOUR MARRIAGE...

UGH. CAMILLE, I HATE
THAT EXPRESSION.

LIKE ROMANCE IS THIS
THING YOU MISPLACED,

LIKE AN EARRING.

I MEAN, ALL THAT STUFF
THEY TELL YOU TO DO...

PUT ROSE PETALS ON HIS PILLOW.

OH, I WILL.

LET ME JUST EMPTY THIS KITTY
LITTER. I'LL BE RIGHT WITH YOU.

WEAR SATIN PANTIES,

LIKE MY DRY-CLEANING BILL
ISN'T FRIGHTENING ENOUGH.

FORCE YOUR HUSBAND INTO A CAR

AND DON'T TELL HIM
WHERE YOU'RE GOING.

I DO THAT EVERY OTHER WEEKEND.

IT'S CALLED VISITING MY PARENTS.

HEH. DIDN'T JANE SEYMOUR
WRITE A BOOK ABOUT THAT?

AH, YES, AND NOW SHE'S DIVORCED.

OH, BUT SHE'S REMARRIED.

SHE'S THAT MEDICINE WOMAN.

AND IS HER HAIR LONG OR SHORT?

SHE'S GOT A NEW
SHOW, NEW HUSBAND,

AND PROBABLY ALL NEW CHILDREN.

LISTEN...

ANDY AND I HAVE
BEEN DOING THIS THING.

IT'S KIND OF EMBARRASSING,

BUT IT'S REALLY FUN.

AND YOU GET TO BE
WITH OTHER PEOPLE.

AND IT REALLY PUTS
YOU IN THE MOOD.

IS IT LEGAL?

THE ONLY CATCH IS THAT
YOU HAVE TO WEAR HEELS.

BALLROOM DANCING?

CAMILLE SAYS IT'S A LOT OF FUN.

CAMILLE THINKS VELCRO'S FUN.

WELL, VELCRO REALLY IS PRETTY
AMAZING, DON'T YOU THINK?

NEIL, PASS THE PASTA.

WHAT'S THE MAGIC WORD?

PASTA.

NO. THAT'S THE
MAGIC CARBOHYDRATE.

WHAT'S THE MAGIC WORD?

NEIL.

NEIL IS MY FATHER'S
YOUNGER BROTHER.

HE ISN'T MARRIED.

WHENEVER HE COMES TO DINNER,

MY PARENTS GIVE HIM
ALL THESE LEFTOVERS

TO TAKE HOME,

LIKE THEY DON'T HAVE
FOOD WHERE HE LIVES.

YOU KNOW,

I KNOW THAT BALLROOM DANCING

DOESN'T SOUND LIKE SOMETHING
WE WOULD NORMALLY DO...

IT SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING
NO ONE WOULD NORMALLY DO.

IT DOES. IT SOUNDS
MADE UP OR SOMETHING.

EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING.

DOESN'T IT? IT'S JUST...

IT'S COMPLETELY MADE UP.

IT'S... THERE'S NO SUCH THING.

HEH HEH HEH!

HA HA!

SO, I'M THINKING OF
GETTING MY HAIR CUT...

SHORT.

NO, MOM.

DON'T.

NO, MOM. WE LIKE
YOUR HAIR HOW IT IS.

MOM, JUST 'CAUSE I CHANGED MY
HAIR DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

SHORT...

LIKE, UH...

HILLARY CLINTON?

FORGET IT.

YOU KNOW,

HILLARY CLINTON IS
A BRILLIANT WOMAN,

AND PEOPLE SHOULD STOP
JUDGING HER BY HER HAIR.

WHO'S JUDGING HER?

I THINK SHE LOOKS GREAT.

I MEAN, DON'T YOU
THINK HILLARY CLINTON

LOOKS GREAT?

I THINK SHE SHOULD
WEAR MORE RED.

IT'S OVER...

ME AND MARLA.

THERE'S STILL A CONNECTION.

I MEAN, WE STILL SEE
EACH OTHER SOMETIMES,

AND ONCE IN A WHILE,

YOU KNOW, WE STILL HAVE SEX.

SOUNDS LIKE MY MARRIAGE.

JUST KIDDING.

NO. I SCREWED UP.

I DON'T...

I... I JUST CAN'T... I DON'T...

OH, BOY.

I MEAN, I ENVY WHAT
YOU HAVE WITH PATTY.

WELL, OF COURSE, PATTY
AND I HAVE OUR PROBLEMS.

YEAH, SURE YOU DO.

YOU DO?

WELL, I MEAN, IT'S
ONLY NORMAL THAT...

YOU KNOW, THINGS
CAN'T ALWAYS BE...

IT... IT'S JUST NOT REALISTIC.

NOT THAT I'M NOT...

YOU KNOW, HAPPY.

WHAT, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

YOU AND PATTY?

HA HA HA.

YOU'RE THE HAPPIEST
COUPLE I KNOW.

NO QUESTION.

I KNOW.

HONEY, NO.

WE'VE DISCUSSED THIS.

IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT.

MOM, I'LL BE RIGHT
ACROSS THE STREET.

I THINK WE SHOULD TRY

THAT BALLROOM DANCING THING.

REALLY?

YOU... YOU REALLY WANT TO?

BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO MA...

I SAID I WANT TO.

WELL...

GREAT.

MOM...

MOM?

MAYBE NEIL CAN
STAY WITH DANIELLE...

AND ANGELA TOLD BRIAN KRAKOW

THAT SHE WOULD HELP HIM WITH
SOME KIND OF SCIENCE EXPERIMENT

TOMORROW NIGHT.

APPARENTLY THERE
IS A MOUSE INVOLVED.

CAN'T THEY BRING
THE MOUSE HERE? MMM,

I DON'T THINK SHE
WANTS DANIELLE AROUND,

FROM THE LOOK ON HER FACE.

I THINK SHE HAS A CRUSH...

ON BRIAN KRAKOW?

SHE COULD DO A LOT WORSE.

I LIKE BRIAN, DON'T YOU?

UNTIL A FEW SECONDS AGO.

♪ ON ♪

MOM...

♪ ON SUCH A NIGHT ♪♪

CAN I GO?

MOM...

Danielle: MOM, STOP SINGING!

I KNOW.

I'M NOT ALLOWED TO SING.

I'M NOT ALLOWED TO DANCE.

AMISH MOM.

MOM, CAN I GO TO
BRIAN'S, YES OR NO?

JUST BE BACK BY 9:30.

SO, WAIT, UM...

SERIOUSLY, SHOULD I...

CUT MY HAIR?

I MEAN...

PRETEND I'M NOT YOUR MOM.

MOM...

I CAN'T PRETEND THAT.

MMM.

ONCE AGAIN,

AN EXPERIMENT CAN
BE TERMED SUCCESSFUL

IF WHAT?

IF THE EXPERIMENT YIELDS
MEANINGFUL RESULTS.

THE THOUGHT THAT I MIGHT
BE SEEING JORDAN CATALANO

IN A FEW HOURS

WAS, LIKE, IMPOSSIBLE
TO COMPREHEND.

LIKE WHEN THEY FIRST TELL YOU

ABOUT INFINITY.

I COULDN'T BELIEVE
HOW LONG IT HAD BEEN

SINCE I'D BEEN INSIDE
BRIAN KRAKOW'S HOUSE...

CONSIDERING HOW
MANY HOURS I SPENT HERE

WHEN I WAS LITTLE.

IT SMELLED EXACTLY THE SAME,

WHICH WAS...

REASSURING...

AND ANNOYING.

SORT OF LIKE BRIAN HIMSELF.

THAT MOUSE CAN BREATHE, RIGHT?

WE'RE MEASURING HEAT AND ENERGY.

IF IT COULDN'T BREATHE, THEN...

THIS CLAMP'S COMING LOOSE.

UM...

UH, LISTEN,

RAYANNE GRAFF AND RICKIE VASQUEZ

MIGHT BE COMING OVER...

FOR A MINUTE JUST TO, UM...

BRING ME SOMETHING.

I KNEW YOU WOULDN'T
BE MUCH HELP.

HI.

I HOPE I'M NOT LATE.

NO.

NO. YOU'RE, UH...

UM...

UH, THAT'S OUR INSTRUCTOR.

SHE JUST, UH...

HI.

SO...

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

YEAH, WELL, IT'S SHORT.

YES, IT IS.

IT, UH...

UH, SHOWS YOUR EARS MORE.

MR. AND MRS. CHASE?

IT'S SHOWTIME.

WHOA! HEH.

SO, THANKS.

SO...

UH, SO, ANGELA'S GOT THE MONEY.

RIGHT. SO...

WAIT HERE.

WE'LL SEND HER OUT.

OH! I ALMOST FORGOT, TINO...

UH, Y-YEAH.

DIDN'T HE SAY THAT, UH..

YEAH. SEE, I MENTIONED
YOU'D BE DROPPING US.

AND... AND HE SAID, "TELL
CATALANO I'LL MEET HIM THERE.

I GOT SOMETHING I
WANT TO TELL HIM."

ABOUT FROZEN EMBRYOS?

WHAT'S THAT?

JUST...

THIS BAND WE MIGHT FORM.

YEAH, I THINK THAT WAS...

I THINK THAT WAS IT.

Dance instructor: SLOW. SLOW.

QUICK. QUICK.

SLOW. SLOW.

QUICK. QUICK.

OK.

YOUR SLOWS ARE TOO QUICK.

YOUR QUICKS ARE TOO SLOW.

OK?

POOR MOUSE.

I HATE JUST BEING
IN AN ELEVATOR.

ANGELA...

WAIT.

I HAVE TO TALK TO YOU.

LOOK, I KNOW THIS IS
YOUR HOUSE AND ALL,

BUT...

COULD YOU LEAVE FOR A SECOND?

OH, SO YOU ACTUALLY
ADMIT THAT IT'S MY HOUSE.

THAT'S REALLY...

'CAUSE I WAS WONDERING.

NO, SHE'S NOT SAYING TO...

I'M NOT SAYING LEAVE
THE HOUSE. HEH.

JUST LEAVE THE KITCHEN.

JUST COME HERE FOR
A SECOND, PLEASE.

I'M REALLY SORRY.

THIS WON'T TAKE LONG.

OHH.

AND BACK,

BACK, BACK.

SLIDE TOGETHER.

OK, PATTY, LET HIM STEER YOU,

'CAUSE HE'S THE
ONE GOING FORWARD.

WELL, WHEN DO I
GET TO GO FORWARD?

WELL, SEE, UM,

IT IS THE MAN WHO GOES
FORWARD MOST FREQUENTLY.

HEH. HEH.

TELL ME ABOUT IT.

WELL, WH...

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW
HARD IT IS TO DO THIS BACKWARDS?

UHH.

BELIEVE ME.

THEY HAD THEIR FREE
INTRODUCTORY CLASS ONCE, TOO.

LISTEN...

A LOT OF TIMES COUPLES
THINK THEY'RE GOING TO

JUST AUTOMATICALLY
DANCE LIKE THAT,

BUT IT'S NOT QUITE THAT SIMPLE.

OK?

AND...

1...

BACK. GOOD.

LET'S GO.

1, 2...

SHE'S NOT SAYING THAT SHE...

I'M NOT SAYING...

SEE, THERE'S THINKING
ABOUT HIM, RIGHT?

WHICH IS WHAT I DO...

ALL THE TIME,

LIKE, LIKE THIS...

OBSESSION.

RIGHT, SO?

SO...

IT KEEPS ME GOING OR SOMETHING,

LIKE I NEED IT JUST TO
GET THROUGH THE DAY.

IT... IT'S JUST...

IT'S AN OBSESSION.

RIGHT, AND... AND
IF YOU MAKE IT REAL,

IT'S... IT'S NOT THE SAME.

IT'S NOT...

IT'S NOT YOURS ANYMORE.

I... I DON'T KNOW.

MAYBE I'D RATHER
HAVE THE FANTASY...

THAN EVEN HIM.

I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND THIS.

I TOTALLY AND
COMPLETELY DISAGREE.

YOU WANT JORDAN
CATALANO IN ACTUALITY

BECAUSE...

THERE IS NO BECAUSE.

YOU JUST WANT HIM.

ONLY YOU'RE PROGRAMMED
TO NEVER ADMIT IT.

THAT DOES HAVE
THE RING OF TRUTH.

OK.

SO HERE'S YOUR FREE EVALUATION,

WHICH IS...

EASY,

'CAUSE YOU BOTH SORT OF HAVE

THE SAME PROBLEM,

UH, WHICH IS RUSHING...

LIKE, AHEAD OF THE MUSIC.

UM, I WOULD STRONGLY RECOMMEND

GROUP CLASSES.

YOU SHOULD BE DANCING
WITH OTHER PEOPLE.

WHAT? WHY?

I DON'T WANT TO DANCE
WITH ANYBODY ELSE.

I MEAN, DO YOU? I...

I... I THOUGHT THE
WHOLE POINT HERE

WAS THAT WE DO
SOMETHING TOGETHER AND...

MAYBE IT HELPS.

I MEAN, MAYBE...

SEE, HE WON'T ADMIT IT,

BUT HE'S DYING TO DANCE
WITH OTHER PEOPLE.

HEY, THIS WAS YOUR IDEA.

I DIDN'T WANT TO
DANCE WITH ANYBODY.

OK. THIS ISN'T EASY.

THERE ARE MANY
DIFFERENT PARTS OF THIS

THAT HAVE TO COME TOGETHER.

LIKE THE RHYTHM.

NOT TOO FAST.

NOT TOO SLOW.

THE CONFIDENCE...

TO MAKE THE STEPS YOUR OWN.

Dance instructor:
LOTS OF PEOPLE,

THEY TRY SO HARD.

THEY CAN'T HEAR THE MUSIC.

THEN...

THEY START TO FEEL LOST.

SO THEY WANT TO LOOK DOWN.

DON'T LOOK DOWN.

IT WILL THROW YOU OFF BALANCE.

AND YOU'LL LOSE YOUR FOOTING.

SO LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD.

LOOK RIGHT INTO
YOUR PARTNER'S EYES...

AND REMEMBER TO SMILE.

HI.

SO, I HAVE THE MONEY.

SO...

YOU HAVE MY I.D., RIGHT?

YEAH.

SO THIS IS YOUR CAR?

GET IN.

UHH.

I... I CAN'T...

GO ANYWHERE.

I MEAN, I...

I SHOULD STAY HERE.

UH...

IT'S A LONG STORY. HEH.

I DIDN'T SAY GO ANYWHERE.

OH, OK.

ALL RIGHT.

SO WHAT'S IT CALLED AGAIN?

A VOLVO...

A VOLUMETER.

AND WHAT'S IT DO AGAIN?

MEASURES PRESSURE.

YEAH, BUT LIKE WHAT?

AIR PRESSURE?

I MEAN, THERE'S A
LOT OF PRESSURES.

ACUPRESSURE, EMOTIONAL PRESSURE.

LIKE THE MOUSE ITSELF
MUST BE UNDER PRESSURE.

OH, THAT WOULD BE
COOL FOR AN EXPERIMENT.

FIGURE OUT WHAT THE
MOUSE ITSELF, LIKE...

LIKE WHAT GOES THROUGH ITS MIND.

WAS IT HARD TO GET IT IN THERE?

SHUT UP!

OHH.

JUST...

SHUT UP.

IT WAS JUST A JOKE.

YOU SHOULD MEASURE
YOUR OWN PRESSURE.

SO...

THE MOUSE MAKES PRESSURE...

JUST BY BREATHING?

YES.

I CAN RELATE.

BUT WHY ARE YOU,

I MEAN...

WHAT IS THE POINT?

IT PROVES...

UM, IT'S A SYSTEM
THAT'S BEEN DEVISED,

AND THERE ARE CERTAIN
SCIENTIFIC PRINCIPLES THAT...

IT'S FOR EXTRA CREDIT.

Angela: WHAT'S AMAZING...

IS WHEN YOU CAN FEEL YOUR LIFE

GOING SOMEWHERE,

LIKE YOUR LIFE JUST FIGURED OUT

HOW TO GET GOOD,

LIKE THAT SECOND.

WOW. IT LOOKS REAL.

UH, WHY IS... MMM!

HEY.

I'M S...

I'M SORRY. I JUST...

NO.

I WAS...

I WAS TALKING. HEH.

NO, NO.

WHATEVER.

SO HOW COME...

QUIT IT!

I MEAN, YOU HAVE
TO WORK UP TO THAT.

I DON'T OPEN THAT
WIDE AT THE DENTIST.

HOW OLD ARE YOU?

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.

WHAT IS YOUR POINT?

15.

YOU ACT YOUNGER.

FIRST OF ALL, YOU DON'T
KNOW ME WELL ENOUGH

TO SAY HOW OLD I
SEEM. AND SECOND...

YOU TALK A LOT.

I'VE SAID, LIKE, EIGHT
SENTENCES TO YOU

MY ENTIRE LIFE.

THIS WHOLE DAY
HAS BEEN ONE LONG...

THING THAT MAKES NO SENSE.

WE BOTH STOPPED TALKING.

PART OF HIS SLEEVE
WAS TOUCHING MY ARM.

I DON'T KNOW IF HE KNEW.

THEN EVERYTHING
STARTED TO SEEM PERFECT

FOR SOME REASON.

THE FEEL OF HIS SHIRT
AGAINST MY ELBOW,

THE FACT THAT I
STILL HAD AN ELBOW.

IT WAS THE PERFECT
MOMENT FOR HIM TO KISS ME,

FOR HIM TO ANYTHING ME.

WELL, I GOT TO GO.

SO...

LATER.

I COULD HAVE KILLED HIM.

YOU'RE BACK SO EARLY?

ANGELA'S NOT EVEN DUE HOME YET.

I THINK DANIELLE'S ASLEEP.

WHOA. WHAT DID
YOU DO TO YOUR HAIR?

BOY, PATTY CAN BE
REALLY TOUCHY SOMETIMES.

I DIDN'T SAY THAT
I DIDN'T LIKE IT.

ALL I... ANYWAY, I
DON'T... YOU KNOW,

IT'S GONNA GROW BACK IN.

NOT IN OUR LIFETIME.

NEIL. NEIL.

I, UH...

I MET THIS GIRL.

WHAT?

WHAT?

WELL, I'M NOT SURPRISED.

HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?

I DON'T KNOW. I JUST... I...

I DIDN'T MEAN TO MEET HER.

I WAS DOING SOME
PRINTING FOR HER,

AND WE STARTED, YOU KNOW...

WE WOULD GET INTO THESE
REALLY LONG CONVERSATIONS,

YOU KNOW, THE
KIND WHERE YOU, UM...

LOOK UP AND YOU'RE SURPRISED

TO SEE OTHER PEOPLE...

YOU'RE BURNING YOUR BUTTER.

ONE DAY OUT OF NOWHERE,

SHE GRABS MY TIE.

SHE SAYS, "I HATE YOU.

I CAN'T SLEEP 'CAUSE OF YOU."

I MEAN, SHE STARTS SAYING
THESE UNBELIEVABLE THINGS.

NOW, SHE WAS ACTUALLY
HOLDING ON TO YOUR TIE AT THIS...

THE POINT IS... THE POINT IS,

WE HAVEN'T REALLY
DONE ANYTHING BUT TALK.

BUT...

YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME.

I MEAN, IF YOU AND PATTY
GET A DIVORCE, THEN WHA...

SHUT UP!

NO ONE'S GETTING A DIVORCE.

WELL, WHERE AM I GOING TO GO?

I MEAN, LIKE... ON HOLIDAYS?

I WAS SUPPOSED TO MEET HER AT
THIS MOTEL TOMORROW AFTERNOON.

HEH HEH. GOD, MAN,
THAT'S SUCH A CLICHÉ.

I KNOW. YOU KNOW,
CLICHÉS HAPPEN.

TALK ME OUT OF IT. DON'T DO IT.

WELL, DON'T.

LOOK AT YOU.

I MEAN, YOU HAVEN'T REALLY
DONE ANYTHING REALLY WRONG YET,

AND ALREADY YOU'RE ACTING WEIRD.

I M...

YOU WENT DANCING.

I KNOW.

UH, HEY.

WHERE'S, UH...

I MEAN, IS TINO HERE?

THAT'S, UH... I MEAN,
THAT'S ANGELA'S.

UM, SHOULDN'T IT
PROVE THAT SHE'S 21?

SO?

SO ACCORDING TO THIS,

SHE WAS BORN YESTERDAY.

WHY ARE YOU HERE?

I LIVE HERE.

IS SHE REALLY FROM, UH, FRANCE?

HEH.

NEVER MIND.

JUST... JUST MAKE SURE
SHE GETS THAT, OK?

SURE.

CAN I SAY SOMETHING?

I DON'T THINK THAT THIS WAS
SUCH A TERRIBLE EVENING.

I NEVER SAID IT WAS.

YEAH, BUT YOU'RE SITTING
THERE THINKING THAT...

YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT I'M THINKING.

OH, SHUT UP.

HOW COULD YOU SAY
THAT ABOUT MY HAIR?

WHAT DID I SAY?

THAT IT SHOWS MY EARS MORE.

IT DOES. YEAH, BUT

WHAT KIND OF A THING IS THAT
TO SAY? DO YOU THINK I FELT

LIKE TANGOING WITH
YOU AFTER THAT?

I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

ALL OF A SUDDEN, THERE'S
ALL THIS... ALL THIS PRESSURE

TO, YOU KNOW, UH... UH...

COMPLIMENT YOU

AND... AND... LEAD.

THERE'S SOMETHING
WRONG HERE. AM I RIGHT?

WE'RE DRIFTING APART

FROM SEEING EACH OTHER TOO MUCH.

WE'VE BECOME LIKE FURNITURE
TO EACH OTHER OR SOMETHING.

I MEAN, HAVE WE
BECOME INCOMPATIBLE?

BECAUSE...

WE ARE TERRIBLE...

I MEAN, WE ARE TERRIBLE DANCERS.

SO WHAT?

SO, HOW CAN WE HAVE
BEEN TOGETHER FOR SO LONG

AND NOT BE ABLE
TO DANCE TOGETHER?

BECAUSE! BECAUSE WE HAVE
BEEN TOGETHER FOR SO LONG.

OHH.

UHH!

DANCE WITH ME.

BUT WE DON'T KNOW HOW.

WE KNOW HOW.

I'M NOT GOING TO
TAKE THE EXTRA CREDIT.

WHATEVER.

YOU FORGOT THIS.

SO, WHY DID OUR GENERATION

ALWAYS DANCE SO FAR APART?

TOO REBELLIOUS, I GUESS.

HMM.

EVEN WHEN WE DANCED CLOSE,

THERE WERE NO...

RIGHT. NO STEPS OR ANYTHING.

JUST...

MADE IT ALL UP.

WE NEVER TOOK THE TIME

TO LEARN... THE REAL STEPS.

THOUGHT I HEARD SOMEONE.

SO, YOUR MOM AND I WENT DANCING.

IT'S HARD.

IT'S HARDER THAN IT SOUNDS.

DAD, I DON'T FEEL LIKE TALKING.

NO OFFENSE.

OH, I DON'T FEEL LIKE TALKING,

CERTAINLY NOT TO YOU.

YOU WANT ME TO WARM
UP THAT SPAGHETTI?

I HAVE TO SAY,

WHEN MY FATHER
WARMS SOMETHING UP,

IT TASTES BETTER THAN
WHEN ANYONE ELSE DOES.

SO HOW DID YOUR
EXPERIMENT GO WITH BRIAN?

HE DID MOST OF IT.

SO IS THIS... LIKE A DATE?

DAD.

IT'S...

THEY'RE NOT...

PEOPLE JUST HANG OUT.

THEY'RE NOT... IT'S NOT DATES.

THERE'S PEOPLE... TOGETHER...

IN A BUNCH.

HMM.

SO, WAS THERE SOMEONE ELSE THERE

YOU LIKE?

IT'S SO STRANGE

HOW PARENTS CAN OUT OF NOWHERE

TURN PSYCHIC.

IT'S UNNERVING.

IT'S OK TO LIKE SOMEONE,

BUT, I MEAN...

BOYS YOUR AGE CAN SOMETIMES...

DAD, I... I KNOW.

CAN SOMETIMES WHAT?

CAN SOMETIMES...

MMM, NOT KNOW HOW TO BE

WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO BE.

MY POINT IS THAT...

HMM.

IT'S REALLY... HARD
TO FIGURE OUT

HOW TO BE A MAN.

HMM.

PRACTICALLY EVERY MAN I KNOW

IS STILL WORKING ON IT.

SO THAT'S WHAT WE'RE
DOING... WE'RE EATING.

REALLY SHOWS MY EARS MORE, HUH?

IT'S TIME FOR BED, YOU TWO.

UH, YOU TWO GO AHEAD.

I'LL CLEAN UP.

IT'S ME.

UH, LISTEN...

I CAN'T DO THIS. HEH.

I KNOW I ACTED LIKE I COULD,

BUT I... I CAN'T.

UH, YOU MUST THINK
THAT I'M AN IDIOT,

AND MAYBE I AM, BUT, UH...

UM, IT'S NOT GOING
TO HAPPEN, UH...

BECAUSE IT CAN'T.

BECAUSE... OH, THERE'S
SO MANY REASONS WHY.

I MEAN...

LOOK, I CAN'T REALLY
TALK, EXCEPT...

NO, THIS IS NOT YOU.

THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

IT'S ME.

I'M SORRY. I JUST CAN'T.

I'M SORRY.

YOU ARE GOING TO
HAVE A HARD TIME

GETTING UP IN THE MORNING.

♪ AND DANCE ♪

♪ BY THE LIGHT OF THE MOON ♪