My Dad the Rock Star (2003–2004): Season 2, Episode 2 - Rock is from Mars, Willy is from Venus - full transcript
♪ It’s so hard ♪
♪ Just to feel normal
♪ When everyone is completely
paranormal ♪
♪ And everything is totally
deranged ♪
♪ And you’re the only one who’s
sane ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ That’s it, the party’s over ♪
♪ Turn off the lights, I’m
leaving the stage ♪
♪ I just wanna get
a little more control ♪
♪ So nobody can tell me what to
do ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak, ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ Yeah, yeah
♪
Ah-whoo!
♪
(Bell ringing)
Man, do I love Fridays.
Word up.
If I hear one more bell ring,
I’m gonna go ballistic, yo.
(Air horn blaring)
(Screaming)
Hey guys, cool siren, huh?
It’s gonna be a hit at the big
deforestation protest Sunday.
My dad and I are chaining
ourselves to a tree.
I can’t wait.
(Cheering)
Sounds neat.
What about you, Q?
Planning to chain yourself to
anything this weekend?
Nah, my dad and I are just
gonna hang out.
We both joined a beginner’s
karate class.
(Making karate sounds)
(Giggling)
What?
So, both of you guys are
hanging out with your dads this
weekend?
Sure, why not?
A little quality time with Dad
never hurt anyone.
Quality time?
That’s so overrated!
I mean, who needs time with your
dad when you have a good memory
and some photo albums, right?
Right?
Are you saying that you and
your dad never just...hang out
together?
No, no, no.
That’s not what I’m saying at
all.
We do tons of stuff together.
Why, just last week--
No, that was Skunk.
Well, there was that time that
we--
No, that never happened.
Wait!
(Feedback screeching)
Skunk, can you please tell me
what is up with these rotten
speakers?
Oh, what’s the problem mate?
What’s the problem?
When I asked for feedback, I
want feedback!
I can hardly hear this at all!
It sounds like a mouse burping
under a pile of pillows!
Get me more feedback, dude!
All right, all right.
No need to blow a gasket,
guv’nor.
(Strings plucking)
Here, I’ll put it through your
headphones.
Try it now.
Oh, now that’s good feedback.
Dad?
I was having this really
interesting conversation with
Alyssa and Quincy today.
Well, turns out they spend a lot
of time just hanging with their
dads.
Well, I was thinking about it,
and we never spend any time
together.
So, what do you think, Dad?
Maybe we can hang together
sometime.
Oh, yeah.
Excellent!
Great, well, I’ve got a
couple ideas--
That was perfect, Skunk!
I can’t feel my fifth vertebrae!
Huh?
Hey, Willy!
Wanna hear some ripping, raw
noise?
Dad!
You didn’t hear a word I said.
That’s just typical!
I was saying that we never spend
a second of quality time
together.
What?
No, that can’t be right.
Hey, what about all those great
Christmas memories we have?
(Sleigh bells jingling)
Oh, hi there.
And welcome to our home.
We love to spend the holidays
together, and now you can spend
the holidays with us too!
With my new Christmas disc,
you’ll wonder why you asked for
anything else.
If you don’t believe me, just
ask my son.
What do you say, Willy?
Hold it right there.
That was for a commercial you
shot!
And the director had me
replaced, remember?!
Willy, this seems like a very
important matter to you, so
let’s have a real
man-to-man-chat kinda thing.
(Doorbell ringing)
Ooh, baby!
My package from reptile of the
month club!
Hey, Rock Zilla!
Wanna buy a chocolate from me
and my dad?
You?
And your dad?
Selling chocolates?
That’s the sweetest thing I’ve
ever heard.
You’re really tugging on the old
Zilla heart strings, here.
Give me all you’ve got.
Uh, we don’t take credit
cards.
Huh?
Well, good luck then.
Oh, I never helped Willy sell
chocolates door-to-door.
(Phone ringing)
Zilla residence.
Skunk baby, is that you?
Well, gor blimey.
If it isn’t Artie, me ol’ mate.
Ain’t you managing that boy band
now?
Oh, please, Skunk.
They prefer to be called a male
singing ensemble.
Their name: Pubescence.
They have the highest girl
fainting percentage of all the
teen heartthrobs.
And they need a roadie!
Mate, uh-- yeah-- that’s
brilliant, but Rock would fall
apart the second I left.
Then you’d have an 8-foot
green-haired maniac on the
loose and I can’t be blamed for
that again.
Skunk, bubbie!
Rock doesn’t need you.
He’s not even on tour.
I’m sorry, mate.
Tour or no tour, my loyalties
are with the Zillas.
Right, like I’d ever work for a
sissy boy band.
I bet they don’t even wear
makeup.
(Sighing)
♪
Hey, hey.
Why so glum?
Come on and up a bowl of chum.
Nah, I think Rock’s gonna
walk.
I’m a little depressed.
Well, a walk is so much more
classy-like when you’re in a
limo.
I need some serious "me" time
here.
There, there.
I’ll let you stick your head out
of the sunroof.
(Cell phone ringing)
Skunk, don’t hang up!
Look, I’ll give you a private
dressing room.
A private van!
A baseball hat with the band’s
logo on it!
Come on, I can’t go any higher
than that!
No, I told you once, now
leave off, chum.
I’ve got important business to
attend to here.
Shall I go through the carwash?
No wax.
(Giggling)
(Sighing)
Hey, kiddo.
Willy, I’ve been thinking.
The truth is, we don’t spend
much time together ’cause we
just don’t have much in common.
Make that nothing in common.
Well, hey.
At least we have our mutual love
of music, right?
(Smooth jazz playing)
(Groaning)
Make the bad music stop!
Oh, right.
Well, we can’t just give up.
Well, maybe we can come up
with a list of things that we
both like to do, and then do
them.
I mean, there’s gotta be
something.
ROCK: All right!
Hey, I got one!
You like goat boxing, right?
(Bleating)
(Chuckling)
Oh, gag me.
What a display!
Even I don’t suck up to Dad that
much.
How much cash are you begging
for?
None.
Ew, I can’t imagine anything
more barf-inducing than actually
spending time with a parent!
Oh, look.
I just got two gift certificates
to that new spa in the mall.
Serenity, do you wanna go with
me?
Come on, Mom.
Here’s your keys, got your card?
Who wants homemade cookies?
Huh?
Alone again.
(Phone ringing)
Skunk, bubbie!
All right, Artie.
You win.
I’ll take the gig.
So it’s decided.
We’ll do an activity from my
list first, and then one from
yours.
Right, what’s first?
Cheese?
Whoa!
What is it, a giant cheese ball?
A cheese museum?
A museum made from cheese!
Dad, that’s not cheese.
It’s chess.
You know, the ancient game of
strategy and intrigue?
Yeah, yeah.
That-- that sounds great.
Okay, king me!
No, Dad.
That’s checkers.
Now I know what they call
this a board game.
I’m totally bored!
(Squishing)
See, Willy?
Don’t you just love it?
Well, don’t hate it.
(Grunting)
Okay, now I hate it.
As you can see, Skunk, we use
only the most modern equipment
there is.
This stuff can do anything!
Hey, here are the boys.
And now you get a chance to
watch this multi-million dollar
studio in action.
♪
(Off tune singing)
♪ Ooh, baby
♪ It’s not brain surgery ♪
♪ And even though you’ll get
kicked out... ♪
Yeah, yeah.
They stink!
But no one ever needs to know,
Skunky baby.
♪Please do my math homework
for me♪
That’s their biggest hit.
Skunk, I’d like you to meet
Pubescence.
This is Rick, Mick, TCB, Jalayo
and Irv.
So, mates, I’ll get the limo
gassed up and ready to go for a
wild night of party crashing.
Yo, as dope as that sounds,
Mr. Skunk, me and my fly homies
gots to be in bed by 9:30.
Otherwise, our pimples come
back with a vengeance.
But here’s how Pubescence shows
their thanks, Mr. Skunk.
Come on, guys.
1, 2...a 1, 2, 3!
♪Baby, it’s not brain surgery♪
♪And even though you’ll get
kicked out of school♪
(Audience chattering)
Ah-whoo!
Oh, yeah!
Rock on!
(Audience booing)
This is the lamest concert I’ve
ever been to.
Hello, Greasy Joe’s Pizza?
I’m not sure about this, Dad.
Yes, that’s right.
Fifty supreme extra-large pies.
My name, it’s Mr. Kant.
K-A-N-T.
Prank phone calls.
There’s gotta be something here
that Dad and I can agree on.
(Flashbulb popping)
(Knocking)
No worries, boys.
I know how to get rid of crazy
fans.
They’re only wee lasses!
(Screaming)
Now Dad, be careful.
It’s very delicate.
Willy, if anyone knows about
delicate, it’s me.
I’m as delicate as a pussy cat.
Whoo, fly baby!
(Engine sputtering)
I’ll be in the car.
Mental note: Dad and remote
control anything does not mix.
I bet Serenity and Mom are
having the same problems.
Mom, this is the worst day
ever.
That’s what I was saying to
myself before we actually got to
the spa, but I was totally
wrong.
More lemonade!
(Roaring)
(Elephants trumpeting)
WILLY THINKING: Hey, I think
we’re finally having fun
together.
As father and son.
Wow, there’s nothing that can
ruin a special moment like
this.
(Rock roaring)
Hey, what gives?!
Dad!
I spoke to the zoo manager, Dad.
We’ll have you out as soon as he
signs the release forms.
That’s it, that’s the last
straw.
This crazy quest for quality
time is officially over.
(Sighing)
Ah, just the guy I wanted you
to meet.
Skunk, this is Kip.
Kip, Skunk.
Your new assistant.
Pleasure to meet you, mate.
I-- wha-- assistant?!
Huh?
Yeah, yeah.
I’m sure I told you about that
on the phone.
Oh, gee.
Look at the time, I gotta go!
That little weasel.
Well, if you’re looking for the
telly it’s in the other room.
No, I’m not looking for the
telly.
Everything on tour is electronic
and works off a simple remote
control.
From the lights...
To the furniture...
To everything else...
(Toilet flushing)
I better remember which
button did that.
Take this, it’s your own
personal remote.
I’ll send over the first 80
pages of the instruction manual
tonight.
Nothing to it.
Yeah, nothing to it.
Dad, I can’t believe you’re
gonna give up so easy.
Face it, Willy.
We’ll never find anything that
we can do together without
ending up being surrounded by a
bunch of a baboons.
(Cheering)
Dad, what if I told you that
we’ve just been handed our last
chance to bond as father and
son?
Sorry, Willy.
There’s nothing you can say
that’ll change my mind.
Well, what if I told you it
meant crashing a party?
Oooh, tell me more!
Make sure you load the acne
cream where the boys can get at
it, in case of an emergency.
(Sighing)
Maybe a nice cup of tea.
(Beeping)
Boil, you nasty thing, ya’.
Ahh!
(Beeping)
Now, where are those lads?
The plane’s about to lift off!
Oh, blimey!
Help, this is my only clean
shirt!
Oh man, this is gonna be
great.
After today, I can wear that
"World’s Greatest Dad" t-shirt
without feeling like a total
fraud!
(Cheering)
So, did we win?
(Laughing)
Oh, so it’s a water fight now,
is it?
(Gasping)
Dad, what are you doing?!
Hey, don’t sweat it, Willy.
We’re just having some fun.
Dad, you’ve ruined the
fireworks display!
Oh, man.
Let’s get out of here.
There’s no telling what these
dads will do to me once they
find out their fireworks show is
ruined!
No, we’re not leaving.
Just because our bonding genes
are messed up doesn’t mean that
we have to spoil the fun for all
the normal people.
(Singing off-key:)
♪ Oh, baby
♪ It’s not brain surgery ♪
♪ And even though you’ll get
kicked out of school ♪
(Phone ringing)
♪ Crazy outta school
♪ Brain surgery
♪ Oh, baby
♪ Please do my math homework
for me ♪
What up, fly homie?
Skunk?
Is that you?
Word.
I mean, yeah, Rock.
It’s me!
I’ve taken a gig with a boy band
and I’m flying all the way above
the Pacific even as we speak.
What are you talking about?
We need you here, desperately!
Give me twenty minutes, mate.
And have some dry clothes
waiting for me, will you?
Well, good luck, boys.
Don’t forget to switch on your
nightlights.
Especially you, Mick.
You know, the right button.
Now this is more like it!
Yahoo!
Party’s not over yet, Willy,
my man.
You know, after all our
miserable attempts, I think we
finally found our common ground.
Dad, spoiling everyone’s fun
is hardly a worthy father and
son activity.
Just you wait.
Well, that’s got her.
Awesome!
Fire at will!
ALL: Oooh!
(Cheering)
Well, we might as well head
home.
There’s no way we can cause any
more damage here.
Oooh, that sounds like a
dare!
Dad.
CRYSTAL: Oh, what a horrible
experience!
Ugh, the spa ran out of
peppermint face cream and had to
use spearmint instead!
But the rest of the day was a
dream come true.
Oh, you said it, dear.
We should do this more often.
(Giggling)
(Crickets chirping)
What a day.
But, nothing a little
stargazing won’t fix.
Huh?
Dad?
Huh?
What are you doing up here?
I don’t know.
There’s something about the
night air that chills me out.
I just feel that up here I can
really--
TOGETHER: Think about things!
Hey, that’s right!
Don’t look now, but we just
might have found something in
common here.
I won’t tell if you won’t.
Hey, wanna see something really
cool?
You were right, Willy.
It’s like there’s a whole other
world out there.
Uh, Dad?
Stars are usually located in the
sky.
Sweet, I’ve gotta get me one
of them trampolines.
Huh?
Oh, yeah.
The sky, right...right.
(Chuckling)
♪
♪ Just to feel normal
♪ When everyone is completely
paranormal ♪
♪ And everything is totally
deranged ♪
♪ And you’re the only one who’s
sane ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ That’s it, the party’s over ♪
♪ Turn off the lights, I’m
leaving the stage ♪
♪ I just wanna get
a little more control ♪
♪ So nobody can tell me what to
do ♪
♪ Sometimes it gets
so unbearable ♪
♪ But mostly I feel
unbelievable ♪
♪ And I’m a freak, ’cause my dad
is a rock star ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ My dad is a rock star
♪ Yeah, yeah
♪
Ah-whoo!
♪
(Bell ringing)
Man, do I love Fridays.
Word up.
If I hear one more bell ring,
I’m gonna go ballistic, yo.
(Air horn blaring)
(Screaming)
Hey guys, cool siren, huh?
It’s gonna be a hit at the big
deforestation protest Sunday.
My dad and I are chaining
ourselves to a tree.
I can’t wait.
(Cheering)
Sounds neat.
What about you, Q?
Planning to chain yourself to
anything this weekend?
Nah, my dad and I are just
gonna hang out.
We both joined a beginner’s
karate class.
(Making karate sounds)
(Giggling)
What?
So, both of you guys are
hanging out with your dads this
weekend?
Sure, why not?
A little quality time with Dad
never hurt anyone.
Quality time?
That’s so overrated!
I mean, who needs time with your
dad when you have a good memory
and some photo albums, right?
Right?
Are you saying that you and
your dad never just...hang out
together?
No, no, no.
That’s not what I’m saying at
all.
We do tons of stuff together.
Why, just last week--
No, that was Skunk.
Well, there was that time that
we--
No, that never happened.
Wait!
(Feedback screeching)
Skunk, can you please tell me
what is up with these rotten
speakers?
Oh, what’s the problem mate?
What’s the problem?
When I asked for feedback, I
want feedback!
I can hardly hear this at all!
It sounds like a mouse burping
under a pile of pillows!
Get me more feedback, dude!
All right, all right.
No need to blow a gasket,
guv’nor.
(Strings plucking)
Here, I’ll put it through your
headphones.
Try it now.
Oh, now that’s good feedback.
Dad?
I was having this really
interesting conversation with
Alyssa and Quincy today.
Well, turns out they spend a lot
of time just hanging with their
dads.
Well, I was thinking about it,
and we never spend any time
together.
So, what do you think, Dad?
Maybe we can hang together
sometime.
Oh, yeah.
Excellent!
Great, well, I’ve got a
couple ideas--
That was perfect, Skunk!
I can’t feel my fifth vertebrae!
Huh?
Hey, Willy!
Wanna hear some ripping, raw
noise?
Dad!
You didn’t hear a word I said.
That’s just typical!
I was saying that we never spend
a second of quality time
together.
What?
No, that can’t be right.
Hey, what about all those great
Christmas memories we have?
(Sleigh bells jingling)
Oh, hi there.
And welcome to our home.
We love to spend the holidays
together, and now you can spend
the holidays with us too!
With my new Christmas disc,
you’ll wonder why you asked for
anything else.
If you don’t believe me, just
ask my son.
What do you say, Willy?
Hold it right there.
That was for a commercial you
shot!
And the director had me
replaced, remember?!
Willy, this seems like a very
important matter to you, so
let’s have a real
man-to-man-chat kinda thing.
(Doorbell ringing)
Ooh, baby!
My package from reptile of the
month club!
Hey, Rock Zilla!
Wanna buy a chocolate from me
and my dad?
You?
And your dad?
Selling chocolates?
That’s the sweetest thing I’ve
ever heard.
You’re really tugging on the old
Zilla heart strings, here.
Give me all you’ve got.
Uh, we don’t take credit
cards.
Huh?
Well, good luck then.
Oh, I never helped Willy sell
chocolates door-to-door.
(Phone ringing)
Zilla residence.
Skunk baby, is that you?
Well, gor blimey.
If it isn’t Artie, me ol’ mate.
Ain’t you managing that boy band
now?
Oh, please, Skunk.
They prefer to be called a male
singing ensemble.
Their name: Pubescence.
They have the highest girl
fainting percentage of all the
teen heartthrobs.
And they need a roadie!
Mate, uh-- yeah-- that’s
brilliant, but Rock would fall
apart the second I left.
Then you’d have an 8-foot
green-haired maniac on the
loose and I can’t be blamed for
that again.
Skunk, bubbie!
Rock doesn’t need you.
He’s not even on tour.
I’m sorry, mate.
Tour or no tour, my loyalties
are with the Zillas.
Right, like I’d ever work for a
sissy boy band.
I bet they don’t even wear
makeup.
(Sighing)
♪
Hey, hey.
Why so glum?
Come on and up a bowl of chum.
Nah, I think Rock’s gonna
walk.
I’m a little depressed.
Well, a walk is so much more
classy-like when you’re in a
limo.
I need some serious "me" time
here.
There, there.
I’ll let you stick your head out
of the sunroof.
(Cell phone ringing)
Skunk, don’t hang up!
Look, I’ll give you a private
dressing room.
A private van!
A baseball hat with the band’s
logo on it!
Come on, I can’t go any higher
than that!
No, I told you once, now
leave off, chum.
I’ve got important business to
attend to here.
Shall I go through the carwash?
No wax.
(Giggling)
(Sighing)
Hey, kiddo.
Willy, I’ve been thinking.
The truth is, we don’t spend
much time together ’cause we
just don’t have much in common.
Make that nothing in common.
Well, hey.
At least we have our mutual love
of music, right?
(Smooth jazz playing)
(Groaning)
Make the bad music stop!
Oh, right.
Well, we can’t just give up.
Well, maybe we can come up
with a list of things that we
both like to do, and then do
them.
I mean, there’s gotta be
something.
ROCK: All right!
Hey, I got one!
You like goat boxing, right?
(Bleating)
(Chuckling)
Oh, gag me.
What a display!
Even I don’t suck up to Dad that
much.
How much cash are you begging
for?
None.
Ew, I can’t imagine anything
more barf-inducing than actually
spending time with a parent!
Oh, look.
I just got two gift certificates
to that new spa in the mall.
Serenity, do you wanna go with
me?
Come on, Mom.
Here’s your keys, got your card?
Who wants homemade cookies?
Huh?
Alone again.
(Phone ringing)
Skunk, bubbie!
All right, Artie.
You win.
I’ll take the gig.
So it’s decided.
We’ll do an activity from my
list first, and then one from
yours.
Right, what’s first?
Cheese?
Whoa!
What is it, a giant cheese ball?
A cheese museum?
A museum made from cheese!
Dad, that’s not cheese.
It’s chess.
You know, the ancient game of
strategy and intrigue?
Yeah, yeah.
That-- that sounds great.
Okay, king me!
No, Dad.
That’s checkers.
Now I know what they call
this a board game.
I’m totally bored!
(Squishing)
See, Willy?
Don’t you just love it?
Well, don’t hate it.
(Grunting)
Okay, now I hate it.
As you can see, Skunk, we use
only the most modern equipment
there is.
This stuff can do anything!
Hey, here are the boys.
And now you get a chance to
watch this multi-million dollar
studio in action.
♪
(Off tune singing)
♪ Ooh, baby
♪ It’s not brain surgery ♪
♪ And even though you’ll get
kicked out... ♪
Yeah, yeah.
They stink!
But no one ever needs to know,
Skunky baby.
♪Please do my math homework
for me♪
That’s their biggest hit.
Skunk, I’d like you to meet
Pubescence.
This is Rick, Mick, TCB, Jalayo
and Irv.
So, mates, I’ll get the limo
gassed up and ready to go for a
wild night of party crashing.
Yo, as dope as that sounds,
Mr. Skunk, me and my fly homies
gots to be in bed by 9:30.
Otherwise, our pimples come
back with a vengeance.
But here’s how Pubescence shows
their thanks, Mr. Skunk.
Come on, guys.
1, 2...a 1, 2, 3!
♪Baby, it’s not brain surgery♪
♪And even though you’ll get
kicked out of school♪
(Audience chattering)
Ah-whoo!
Oh, yeah!
Rock on!
(Audience booing)
This is the lamest concert I’ve
ever been to.
Hello, Greasy Joe’s Pizza?
I’m not sure about this, Dad.
Yes, that’s right.
Fifty supreme extra-large pies.
My name, it’s Mr. Kant.
K-A-N-T.
Prank phone calls.
There’s gotta be something here
that Dad and I can agree on.
(Flashbulb popping)
(Knocking)
No worries, boys.
I know how to get rid of crazy
fans.
They’re only wee lasses!
(Screaming)
Now Dad, be careful.
It’s very delicate.
Willy, if anyone knows about
delicate, it’s me.
I’m as delicate as a pussy cat.
Whoo, fly baby!
(Engine sputtering)
I’ll be in the car.
Mental note: Dad and remote
control anything does not mix.
I bet Serenity and Mom are
having the same problems.
Mom, this is the worst day
ever.
That’s what I was saying to
myself before we actually got to
the spa, but I was totally
wrong.
More lemonade!
(Roaring)
(Elephants trumpeting)
WILLY THINKING: Hey, I think
we’re finally having fun
together.
As father and son.
Wow, there’s nothing that can
ruin a special moment like
this.
(Rock roaring)
Hey, what gives?!
Dad!
I spoke to the zoo manager, Dad.
We’ll have you out as soon as he
signs the release forms.
That’s it, that’s the last
straw.
This crazy quest for quality
time is officially over.
(Sighing)
Ah, just the guy I wanted you
to meet.
Skunk, this is Kip.
Kip, Skunk.
Your new assistant.
Pleasure to meet you, mate.
I-- wha-- assistant?!
Huh?
Yeah, yeah.
I’m sure I told you about that
on the phone.
Oh, gee.
Look at the time, I gotta go!
That little weasel.
Well, if you’re looking for the
telly it’s in the other room.
No, I’m not looking for the
telly.
Everything on tour is electronic
and works off a simple remote
control.
From the lights...
To the furniture...
To everything else...
(Toilet flushing)
I better remember which
button did that.
Take this, it’s your own
personal remote.
I’ll send over the first 80
pages of the instruction manual
tonight.
Nothing to it.
Yeah, nothing to it.
Dad, I can’t believe you’re
gonna give up so easy.
Face it, Willy.
We’ll never find anything that
we can do together without
ending up being surrounded by a
bunch of a baboons.
(Cheering)
Dad, what if I told you that
we’ve just been handed our last
chance to bond as father and
son?
Sorry, Willy.
There’s nothing you can say
that’ll change my mind.
Well, what if I told you it
meant crashing a party?
Oooh, tell me more!
Make sure you load the acne
cream where the boys can get at
it, in case of an emergency.
(Sighing)
Maybe a nice cup of tea.
(Beeping)
Boil, you nasty thing, ya’.
Ahh!
(Beeping)
Now, where are those lads?
The plane’s about to lift off!
Oh, blimey!
Help, this is my only clean
shirt!
Oh man, this is gonna be
great.
After today, I can wear that
"World’s Greatest Dad" t-shirt
without feeling like a total
fraud!
(Cheering)
So, did we win?
(Laughing)
Oh, so it’s a water fight now,
is it?
(Gasping)
Dad, what are you doing?!
Hey, don’t sweat it, Willy.
We’re just having some fun.
Dad, you’ve ruined the
fireworks display!
Oh, man.
Let’s get out of here.
There’s no telling what these
dads will do to me once they
find out their fireworks show is
ruined!
No, we’re not leaving.
Just because our bonding genes
are messed up doesn’t mean that
we have to spoil the fun for all
the normal people.
(Singing off-key:)
♪ Oh, baby
♪ It’s not brain surgery ♪
♪ And even though you’ll get
kicked out of school ♪
(Phone ringing)
♪ Crazy outta school
♪ Brain surgery
♪ Oh, baby
♪ Please do my math homework
for me ♪
What up, fly homie?
Skunk?
Is that you?
Word.
I mean, yeah, Rock.
It’s me!
I’ve taken a gig with a boy band
and I’m flying all the way above
the Pacific even as we speak.
What are you talking about?
We need you here, desperately!
Give me twenty minutes, mate.
And have some dry clothes
waiting for me, will you?
Well, good luck, boys.
Don’t forget to switch on your
nightlights.
Especially you, Mick.
You know, the right button.
Now this is more like it!
Yahoo!
Party’s not over yet, Willy,
my man.
You know, after all our
miserable attempts, I think we
finally found our common ground.
Dad, spoiling everyone’s fun
is hardly a worthy father and
son activity.
Just you wait.
Well, that’s got her.
Awesome!
Fire at will!
ALL: Oooh!
(Cheering)
Well, we might as well head
home.
There’s no way we can cause any
more damage here.
Oooh, that sounds like a
dare!
Dad.
CRYSTAL: Oh, what a horrible
experience!
Ugh, the spa ran out of
peppermint face cream and had to
use spearmint instead!
But the rest of the day was a
dream come true.
Oh, you said it, dear.
We should do this more often.
(Giggling)
(Crickets chirping)
What a day.
But, nothing a little
stargazing won’t fix.
Huh?
Dad?
Huh?
What are you doing up here?
I don’t know.
There’s something about the
night air that chills me out.
I just feel that up here I can
really--
TOGETHER: Think about things!
Hey, that’s right!
Don’t look now, but we just
might have found something in
common here.
I won’t tell if you won’t.
Hey, wanna see something really
cool?
You were right, Willy.
It’s like there’s a whole other
world out there.
Uh, Dad?
Stars are usually located in the
sky.
Sweet, I’ve gotta get me one
of them trampolines.
Huh?
Oh, yeah.
The sky, right...right.
(Chuckling)
♪