Murphy Brown (1988–2018): Season 2, Episode 5 - Miles' Big Adventure - full transcript
.
GOT IT.
YOU KNOW MY NUMBER?
HOW MANY TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO ASK?
I'M AS GOOD AS GONE.
SIX DAYS OF FUN AND SUN IN TOBAGO
SO LONG, NONSTOP CALLS.
GOOD-BYE, CHRONIC DEADLINES...
FRANK, YOUR PIECE ON THE BIG THREE AUTO MAKERS
HAS TO BE EDITED BY TUESDAY.
WHAT'S HE STILL DOING HERE?
JUST SAY YOU'LL DO IT, FRANK.
I'LL DO IT. I'LL DO IT.
AH, LOOK.
HERE'S THE ELEVATOR.
MILES, LOOK. I KNOW THIS IS YOUR FIRST VACATION AWAY FROM F.Y.I.
BUT YOU'VE GOT TO LEARN
TO LOOSEN UP, MY MAN.
THE ONLY THING
YOU SHOULD BE WORRYING ABOUT
IS HOW YOU'RE GOING TO FEND OFF ALL THOSE GORGEOUS ISLAND WOMEN.
FRANK, YOU THINK I'M GOING THERE TO MEET WOMEN?
IT'S A CHANCE TO UNWIND, RECHARGE THE GRAY MATTER.
THE CLUB TAKES CARE OF EVERYTHING.
YOU DON'T EVEN NEED YOUR WALLET.
YOU PAY WITH BEADS THAT YOU WEAR.
YOU WEAR AROUND YOUR NECK.
IT'S A GOOD THING, BECAUSE I DON'T REALLY SEE
ANY POCKETS ON THESE.
WHY, MILES, YOU SHOW DOG.
DOESN'T LEAVE MUCH
TO THE IMAGINATION.
GIVE ME THOSE.
WHAT'S THE MEANING THIS?
MILES WAS JUST LEAVING.
BYE, MILES.
JUST A MEMO ABOUT THE SPONSOR'S MEETING.
THE THIRD MEMO THIS MORNING.
I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE MY DESK WAS CLEAR SO I COULD GET OUT OF HERE.
KNOWING THAT YOU'VE SCREENED THE PIECE ON THE C.I.A.?
YES.
RESERVED SATELLITE TIME?
YESTERDAY.
DID YOU..?
GET OUT, DAMN IT.
MURPHY, MAKE HIM GO. I'M SICK OF HIM.
MILES, DO WE HAVE TO FAX YOU THERE?
I THINK WE CAN GET BY WITHOUT YOU FOR SIX LOUSY DAYS.
YES, I KNOW.
OKAY... I'M GOING.
Corky: MILES...
AM I GLAD I CAUGHT YOU.
AND I HADN'T EVEN LEFT THE BUILDING.
I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO GIVE YOU THE LIST OF THINGS I WANT
FROM THE DUTY-FREE SHOP.
I WROTE THEM DOWN IN ORDER OF IMPORTANCE
BUT IF YOU GIVE YOURSELF ENOUGH TIME AT THE AIRPORT
YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET EVERYTHING.
I DEFINITELY NEED A BOTTLE OF SHALIMAR PERFUME--
NOT THE COLOGNE, NOT THE TOILET WATER
THE PERFUME.
THEY MAY TRY TO SELL YOU ONE OF THOSE BOXES WITH A LOT OF LITTLE PERFUMES IN IT.
I DON'T WANT THAT.
IF YOU GET IT, I'M T PAYING FOR IT.
NOW, THE NEXT THING...
HEY, GOT TO GO.
EVERYBODY, SAY GOOD-BYE TO MILES.
All: BYE, MILES.
OKAY, SEE YOU ON SHOW NIGHT.
MARV, I'M COUNTING ON YOU.
BOBBY, YOU GOT THE NEW GRAPHICS.
FRANK, IF THERE'S ANY...
GO! GO! GO!
YEAH, I TOLD YOU.
SHE STEPPED AWAY FROM HER DESK
(slowly:) STEPPED AWAY.
IT MEANS SHE'S NOT HERE, OKAY?
A MESSAGE?
OH, GREAT.
NOW I GOT TO FIND A PEN.
HI. DID I GET ANY CALLS?
DID YOU GET CALLS?
ALL DAY YOU GET CALLS
AND EVERYBODY WANTS SOMETHING.
LIKE I DON'T HAVE A LIFE TOO.
ANOTHER MESSAGE FROM MILES.
HE'S CALLED 27 TIMES IN SIX DAYS.
I'M THE ONE WHO NEEDS A VACATION.
HE'S COMING HOME TODAY.
THAT SHOULD EASE YOUR WORKLOAD.
I QUIT MY LAST JOB
BECAUSE I COULDN'T STAND THE PACE ANYMORE.
SO FAR, THIS ISN'T MUCH BETTER.
WHAT WAS YOUR LAST JOB?
18 YEARS AT THE D.M.V.
BLINK ALL YOU WANT, JERKFACE.
I'M ON A BREAK.
(with a French accent:) HELLO, MURPHY BROWN'S OFFICE.
AND WHOM SHALL I SAY IS CALLING?
GET OFF THE PHONE.
FRANK...
GET OFF THE PHONE.
YOU'LL THANK ME.
GET OFF THE PHONE!
SHE'S NOT HERE.
SHE'S AT THE CHEESE SHOP.
I'LL HAVE HER CALL YOU WHEN SHE GETS BACK.
THIS BETTER BE GOOD.
I HEARD FROM MY EARS AT THE PENTAGON
WORD IS, AN AMERICAN PILOT TOOK OFF WITH A FIGHTER JET.
FRANK, THAT'S NOT GET-OFF-THE-PHONE MATERIAL.
SO SOME COWBOY'S TAKING A JOYRIDE AT MACH ONE.
OH, YEAH? THIS COWBOY IS RIDING A JET LOADED WITH NUCLEAR WARHEADS
AND HE HAS NO INTENTION OF BRINGING IT BACK.
YOU'RE KIDDING. GOT ANY CONFIRMATION?
NOT YET, BUT I'M WORKING ON IT.
MURPHY, FRANK, I JUST HEARD SOMETHING.
I DON'T WANT TO TALK OUT OF SCHOOL.
NOTHING'S BEEN CONFIRMED.
WE CAN'T JUMP THE GUN ON MERELY HEARSAY AND RUMOR...
JIM, JUST CUT TO THE CHASE.
SOME BOZO STOLE A PLANE.
HE'S THREATENING TO BLOW UP ITS NUCLEAR MISSILES.
WAIT A MINUTE, A PILOT CAN'T DETONATE MISSILES HIMSELF. DOESN'T HE HAVE TO HAVE A CODE?
HE HAS THE CODE.
I WANT TO PUT A TEAM ON THIS RIGHT NOW.
FIND OUT HOW THE FAILSAFE SYSTEM BROKE DOWN.
GUYS, GET A LOAD OF WHAT JUST CAME IN OVER THE WIRE.
YEAH, WE KNOW.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?
IT'S YOUR CALL, JIM.
SCRAP TONIGHT'S SHOW.
PULL AS MANY PEOPLE AS WE NEED.
LET'S GO LIVE WITH THIS TONIGHT.
ALL RIGHT! YOU GOT IT.
(phone ringing)
MURPHY BROWN'S OFFICE.
AW, MILES.
REACH OUT AND TOUCH SOMEBODY ELSE.
I CAN'T TALK NOW.
HOLD ON.
NO, MURPHY, DON'T PUT ME ON HOLD!
TERRIFIC.
YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS JUST THINKING?
WHAT ARE THE CHANCES, OF ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD
YOU AND I WOULD BE PAIRED OFF IN A SING-ALONG?
NOW HERE WE ARE, BOTH OF US, STUCK IN THE TOBAGO AIRPORT.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
WE'RE SENDING MEN TO THE MOON AND ROCKETS TO NEPTUNE
AND THIS STUPID AIRLINE
CAN'T EVEN GET ME TO WASHINGTON ON TIME.
I'M GOING TO MISS THE BROADCAST.
I FIND YOUR WORK SO FASCINATING.
MY EX-BOYFRIEND NEIL WAS IN SALES.
SALES ATTRACTS PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PEOPLE.
HE WAS BASICALLY MANIPULATIVE, NOT LIKE YOU.
YOU KNOW, ROCHESTER ISN'T FAR FROM WASHINGTON.
I WENT ONCE, MY SENIOR YEAR IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I HAVEN'T BEEN BACK SINCE
BUT THEN, I NEVER HAD A REASON TO.
OKAY, AT 11:17, AIR FORCE PILOT MAJOR GLENN DIXON
TOOK OFF IN AN F-15 EAGLE FROM MacDILL AIR FORCE BASE.
AT 11:47, HE VEERED OFF COURSE OVER VENEZUELA AND RADIOED IN
THAT UNLESS HIS ESTRANGED WIFE, ONE BONNIE DIXON, RECONCILES WITH HIM
HE'LL DETONATE THE NUCLEAR DEVICES ON THE JET.
VERY GOOD.
CORKY, NICE JOB.
WHO'S YOUR SOURCE?
I JUST HAD LUNCH WITH A CONGRESSIONAL AIDE. HE TOLD ME EVERYTHING.
HE WANTS TO GET TO FIRST BASE--
LIKE HE HAS A PRAYER.
THE PENTAGON SPOKESMAN IS STONEWALLING.
YOU SHOULD HEAR HIS VOICE CRACK. IT'S AS GOOD AS A CONFIRMATION.
YOU'VE GOT A SOURCE AT THE DEFENSE DEPARTMENT.
CAN YOU FIND OUT WHERE THAT JET IS NOW?
I'M ON IT.
OH, DAMN, MILES.
IF YOU'RE CALLING TO HAVE ME CONFIRM
YOUR KOSHER MEAL ON THE PLANE ONE MORE TIME...
MURPHY, MY PLANE'S BEEN DELAYED.
I'M GOING TO MISS THE BROADCAST TONIGHT.
THIS IS A DISASTER.
I CAME THIS CLOSE TO GOING TO CANCUN, BUT NO, I HAD TO SAVE 50 BUCKS.
Miles, get a grip. We've got a major story here.
An Air Force pilot took a fighter jet.
He's threatening to blow up his warheads.
OH, JEEZ!
THE BIGGEST STORY OF THE YEAR
AND I'M STUCK IN A HOT, SWEATY AIRPORT WATCHING LUGGAGE SPIN.
LET ME PUT MORE CREAM ON THAT NOSE.
I'M IN HELL!
We're looking for the pilot.
Get back when you can.
I'D BE ON MY WAY NOW
IF THEY HADN'T CLOSED THE RUNWAY.
LET ME TELL YOU THIS-- I BETTER GET DOUBLE MILEAGE ON MY FREQUENT FLYER ACCOUNT
BECAUSE THEY DO NOT KNOW WHO THEY'RE DEALING WITH.
MURPHY, HOLD ON A MINUTE.
DO NOT HANG UP.
HI. IS THIS REALLY MURPHY BROWN?
I'M PHOEBE CRAMER.
I LOVE YOU, MURPHY.
YOU KNOW, I SAW YOU ON TV ONCE
WEARING THIS BURGUNDY SWEATER WITH BUTTONS ON THE SHOULDERS
SO I BOUGHT ONE
JUST LIKE IT.
DID YOU HAVE TROUBLE WITH THE BUTTON HOLES UNRAVELLING..?
WHAT KIND OF PLANE DID YOU SAY THAT PILOT HAS?
An F-15.
THE EAGLE-- THE LONG-RANGE TWIN ENGINE INTERCEPTOR WITH THE DUAL TAIL FINS?
WOW!
WHERE DID ALL THOSE TANKS COME FROM?
MURPHY, EITHER THEY'RE HAVING A VERY SMALL AIR SHOW
OR I KNOW WHERE THAT PILOT LANDED.
Phil: LUNCH!
(cheering)
EGG SALAD SANDWICHES.
(groaning)
HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY. YOU WANT 30 SANDWICHES IN 30 MINUTES
THAT'S WHAT YOU GET.
BUT I SLICED THE PICKLE.
I DON'T DO THAT FOR JUST ANY OUTFIT.
YOU GUYS MUST FEEL PRETTY GOOD.
THE NIGHTLINE GUYS ARE CRYING IN THEIR BEER
ABOUT HOW YOU ACED THEM.
WE GOT LUCKY.
WE GOT MILES ON THE ISLAND AND AN HOUR OF LIVE TELEVISION IN PRIME TIME.
NOW WE GOT TO MAKE IT WORK.
SOME VACATION MILES TOOK, HUH?
IF THAT BOMB GOES OFF
ALL THE SUN BLOCK IN THE WORLD
WON'T SAVE HIM.
(phone ringing)
MURPHY BROWN'S OFFICE.
MILES!
GUYS, IT'S MILES.
TELL US WHAT'S GOING ON THERE?
THEY'RE EVACUATING THE ISLAND.
ALMOST EVERYONE'S GONE EXCEPT SOME GUARDS
A FEW TANKS, ME...
AND A LUNATIC WITH AN H-BOMB.
I WANT YOU TO LISTEN TO ME VERY CAREFULLY.
NOBODY HAS TO BE A HERO.
IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT, IT'S OKAY.
I know that.
BUT THIS IS A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME SITUATION.
THIS IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT RIGHT?
THEY'RE BOARDING MY FLIGHT
I COULD STAY WITH YOU.
NO!
I MEAN, THANKS ANYWAY, PHOEBE, BUT IT'S TOO DANGEROUS.
I CAN'T ALLOW THE RISKS THAT I TAKE
IN MY LINE OF WORK TO HURT INNOCENT PEOPLE.
MY DEAR, SWEET, BRAVE MILES.
ALWAYS THINKING OF OTHERS
EVEN IF IT MEANS HAVING TO FACE THIS ALONE.
JUST THINK, MILES
I COULD BE THE LAST WOMAN YOU'LL EVER SEE.
Murphy: Miles?
I'M HERE, I'M HERE.
HAS ANYBODY APPROACHED THE FIGHTER?
No.
THERE'S SOME BIGWIGS HERE--
AIR FORCE AND STATE DEPARTMENT.
THEY'RE IN THE CONTROL TOWER.
I COULDN'T GET PAST THE GUARD.
HE'S HAVING TROUBLE
GETTING PAST THE GUARD
MILES, THIS IS WHAT YOU DO.
MAKE A CONNECTION WITH HIM.
IF HE HAS A BROTHER, YOU HAVE A BROTHER.
IF HIS FAMILY'S FROM A SMALL VILLAGE, YOUR FAMILY'S FROM A SMALL VILLAGE.
GET HIS TRUST, THEN BRIBE HIM.
GO FOR HIS EGO, MILES. TELL HIM YOU'LL PUT HIM ON THE AIR.
FORGET THE GUARD.
THERE'VE GOT TO BE PEOPLE GOING IN AND OUT OF THE CONTROL TOWER.
MAKE CONTACT WITH ONE OF THEM. PUSH YOUR WAY IN, BUT DON'T BE TOO AGGRESSIVE.
BUT DON'T SCARE THEM OFF.
TRY THE LOCALS. WHAT ABOUT THE WIFE?
Is she there yet?
Is there a time limit?
SLOW DOWN! SLOW DOWN!
OKAY, THAT'S IT. FRANK AND JIM HAVE TO GO NOW.
DON'T YOU, FRANK AND JIM?
YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB, BUDDY. GOT TO RUN.
WONDERFUL JOB. TRULY.
I'M STILL HERE, MILES.
NOW, I'M GOING TO SAY THIS ONE MORE TIME.
THIS IS TOUGH, EVEN FOR A SEASONED REPORTER.
MAYBE YOU SHOULD GET OUT WHILE YOU HAVE THE CHANCE.
LOOK, MURPHY, I HEAR THINGS AROUND THE OFFICE.
I KNOW SOME PEOPLE DON'T THINK OF ME AS A REAL JOURNALIST.
THEY THINK I'M JUST A PENCIL-PUSHER.
I WANT THIS STORY.
IT'S IMPORTANT TO ME.
THEN DO IT, MILES. GET INTO THAT CONTROL TOWER.
WE ALL KNOW YOU CAN DO IT.
I'LL TALK TO YOU ON THE PHONE AGAIN TONIGHT.
ON THE AIR.
Stage manager: LISTEN UP, PEOPLE.
WE START WITH MILES
THEN FRANK AT THE PENTAGON
GO TO MURPHY'S PRE-TAPED INTERVIEW FROM THE STATE DEPARTMENT
AND FINISH WITH CORKY'S PIECE.
UNBELIEVABLE. WE STILL DON'T KNOW HOW THE PILOT GOT THOSE DETONATION CODES.
THE PUBLIC DEPENDS ON US FOR FACTS,
YET MINUTES BEFORE WE'RE TO GO ON THE AIR
WE'RE STRUGGLING TO PULL INFORMATION FROM 100 PLACES, OUR RESOURCES PUSHED TO THE LIMIT.
DOES IT GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS?
OH, DID ANYBODY GET MILES' PICTURE TO THE BOOTH?
I FOUND ONE IN HIS OFFICE.
MILES, WHAT ELSE DO YOU HAVE?
Just some stuff about a Defense Department task force
and a few quotes from some locals. Doesn't feel like much.
You would have made it into the control tower.
WELL, THAT'S ME.
WHATEVER YOU HAVE, I'M SURE WILL BE FINE.
IS THAT MILES?
YEAH.
TELL HIM OUR PRAYERS ARE WITH HIM
AND WE'RE PROUD OF HIM--
GIVING THE WORLD A CLOSE-UP ACCOUNT
OF AN EVENT THAT COULD WREAK ENVIRONMENTAL HAVOC
AND TELL HIM THAT EVEN IF HE BLOWS IT COMPLETELY
WE'LL STILL LOVE HIM.
CORKY SAYS "HI."
ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE, TAKE YOUR PLACES.
THIS IS IT.
GOOD LUCK.
GOING LIVE, IN FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO...
(F.Y.I. theme song)
GOOD EVENING.
WELCOME TO A SPECIAL EDITION OF F.Y.I.
FOR YOUR INFORMATION TONIGHT, SOMETHING OUT OF A MOVIE--
SOMETHING THE EXPERTS SAID COULDN'T HAPPEN--
IS TAKING PLACE ON THE SMALL ISLAND OF TOBAGO.
AN AIR FORCE FIGHTER PILOT
DESPONDENT OVER THE BREAKUP OF HIS MARRIAGE
IS HOLDING THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE A NUCLEAR HOSTAGE.
ONLY ONE NEWSMAN, F.Y.I.'S EXECUTIVE PRODUCER, MILES SILVERBERG
IS AT THE AIRPORT IN TOBAGO.
IN THIS EXCLUSIVE LIVE REPORT
HE TALKS BY PHONE TO MURPHY BROWN.
MILES, WE'VE ALL HEARD THE OFFICIAL REPORTS
COMING OUT OF THE WHITE HOUSE AND THE PENTAGON
BUT YOU ALONE ARE THERE AT THE SCENE.
TELL US, WHAT IS HAPPENING AT THE AIRPORT?
Well, Murphy...
Operator: Please deposit an additional $1.15 for the next minute.
Miles: What? I don't have...
(dial tone)
I CAN MAKE YOU RING.
I CAN MAKE YOU RING...
RIGHT NOW!
I CAN MAKE YOU RING...
RIGHT... RIGHT...
NOW!
I CAN MAKE YOU MELT.
(rings)
MILES?
MILES! GUYS, IT'S MILES.
Before you jump on me, I thought I had enough change.
Beads up the wazoo, but no change.
I tried to call collect, but there's not a single operator left on the island.
HOW ARE YOU CALLING NOW?
I saw this car phone in one of the jeeps
so I borrowed it.
WAY TO GO, MILES.
WE GOT MILES HOOKED UP. WE'RE GOING LIVE.
WAIT A MINUTE.
MILES, REMEMBER, YOU CAN DO THIS.
I'M HERE TO WALK YOU THROUGH IT.
IN FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO...
WE'VE RECONNECTED WITH F.Y.I.'S MILES SILVERBERG
THE ONLY NEWSMAN ON THE SCENE IN TOBAGO.
HE NOW TALKS WITH MURPHY BROWN.
MILES, CAN YOU DESCRIBE THE SCENE FOR US?
Murphy, it's been over 12 hours
and the pilot is still holding his ground
aboard the F-15 Eagle.
There is an eerie stillness.
The scene's so quiet you'd think even the birds have left the island.
I'm on the runway.
WHAT?
YOU'RE WHERE?
In a jeep, about ten feet
from the waiting jet.
WHAT'S HE DOING? HE'S CRAZY.
TELL US, MILES, HOW DID YOU GET THERE?
I saw a jeep.
I got into it.
I drove it real fast.
OH, MY GOD...
I can see Major Dixon inside the cockpit.
He's spotted me.
I am holding up my press card.
He's raising the hatch.
A GOOD REPORTER LIKE YOURSELF DOESN'T NEED TO BE REMINDED
THAT FREQUENTLY, THESE PEOPLE ARE IN NO MOOD TO TALK.
Major Dixon!
My name is Miles Silverberg!
I have a live hookup to the States.
If you speak loudly
you can send a message to your wife.
Dixon: Can you hear me?
WE CAN HEAR HIM.
Miles: We can!
How are you doing in there?
Dixon: Right now, I'd kill for some orange Gatorade
and Charlie Pride on the headset.
Miles: Major, why did you steal the jet?
Dixon: If you know a better way to get my wife's attention
I'd like to hear it.
She won't take my calls, answer my letters...
Hell, I even sent her flowers.
BIG DEAL.
Miles: Is there anything you'd like to say to your wife now?
Dixon: Bonnie...
I love you.
If you're going to leave me
just give me a chance to talk to you first.
Just talk to me
and I'll climb down out of this plane.
That's it.
That's all I have to say for now.
Miles: Thank you, Major.
A man who loves his wife.
This story isn't so complicated.
Murphy?
BACK TO YOU, JIM.
WE'LL CONTINUE WITH THIS SPECIAL EDITION OF F.Y.I.--
TOBAGO: TIME BOMB OF TERROR-- AFTER THIS.
WE ARE INTO COMMERCIAL.
(cheering)
Miles: And as the hatch closes
a light rain begins to fall
upon the giant bird of destruction--
a gentle rain that lets linger the fateful question
whether innocent babes of this island may return
to suckle of mother's milk, safely come the morn...
GOD, I HATE THE DAY AFTER A BIG STORY.
SUCH A LETDOWN.
THE RUSH OF ADRENALINE, GONE.
YOUR STEP, SLOWER.
FACE IT-- A MADMAN WITH A WARHEAD CAN REALLY SPOIL YOU.
HI, GUYS.
ALL HAIL THE CONQUERING HERO!
WE'RE SO GLAD YOU'RE HOME.
MILES, GOT TO HAND IT TO YOU, YOU MADE IT THROUGH SOME HAIRY MOMENTS THERE, BUDDY.
IT'S FUNNY.
AFTER TALKING TO HIM, I FELT CONFIDENT HE'D SURRENDER.
I WASN'T AFRAID.
YOU COULD BE RADIOACTIVE DUST
CONTAMINATING SOMEBODY'S DRINKING WATER.
I'VE BEEN IN SITUATIONS
THAT WEREN'T HALF AS BAD AND I'VE BEEN AFRAID.
GREAT, BECAUSE I WAS SCARED OUT OF MY MIND.
MY LEGS WERE RUBBER
MY STOMACH WAS CLAMPING UP, I WAS SWEATING EVERYWHERE...
HAVE SOME PRIDE, MILES.
I WANT YOU ALL TO KNOW IT REALLY HELPED
KNOWING YOU WERE BACK HERE, SUPPORTING ME.
THANKS.
MURPHY.
MILES.
SO WHAT DID YOU THINK?
NICE JOB.
I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT.
THANKS.
WAIT A MINUTE.
IT'S NOT TRUE.
I DIDN'T THINK YOU COULD DO IT, MILES.
I DIDN'T THINK YOU HAD IT IN YOU.
I WAS WRONG.
YOU WERE REALLY GREAT OUT THERE.
REALLY GREAT.
RIGHT NOW, I FEEL LIKE I CAN HANDLE ANYTHING.
(elevator bell rings)
GOT IT.
YOU KNOW MY NUMBER?
HOW MANY TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO ASK?
I'M AS GOOD AS GONE.
SIX DAYS OF FUN AND SUN IN TOBAGO
SO LONG, NONSTOP CALLS.
GOOD-BYE, CHRONIC DEADLINES...
FRANK, YOUR PIECE ON THE BIG THREE AUTO MAKERS
HAS TO BE EDITED BY TUESDAY.
WHAT'S HE STILL DOING HERE?
JUST SAY YOU'LL DO IT, FRANK.
I'LL DO IT. I'LL DO IT.
AH, LOOK.
HERE'S THE ELEVATOR.
MILES, LOOK. I KNOW THIS IS YOUR FIRST VACATION AWAY FROM F.Y.I.
BUT YOU'VE GOT TO LEARN
TO LOOSEN UP, MY MAN.
THE ONLY THING
YOU SHOULD BE WORRYING ABOUT
IS HOW YOU'RE GOING TO FEND OFF ALL THOSE GORGEOUS ISLAND WOMEN.
FRANK, YOU THINK I'M GOING THERE TO MEET WOMEN?
IT'S A CHANCE TO UNWIND, RECHARGE THE GRAY MATTER.
THE CLUB TAKES CARE OF EVERYTHING.
YOU DON'T EVEN NEED YOUR WALLET.
YOU PAY WITH BEADS THAT YOU WEAR.
YOU WEAR AROUND YOUR NECK.
IT'S A GOOD THING, BECAUSE I DON'T REALLY SEE
ANY POCKETS ON THESE.
WHY, MILES, YOU SHOW DOG.
DOESN'T LEAVE MUCH
TO THE IMAGINATION.
GIVE ME THOSE.
WHAT'S THE MEANING THIS?
MILES WAS JUST LEAVING.
BYE, MILES.
JUST A MEMO ABOUT THE SPONSOR'S MEETING.
THE THIRD MEMO THIS MORNING.
I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE MY DESK WAS CLEAR SO I COULD GET OUT OF HERE.
KNOWING THAT YOU'VE SCREENED THE PIECE ON THE C.I.A.?
YES.
RESERVED SATELLITE TIME?
YESTERDAY.
DID YOU..?
GET OUT, DAMN IT.
MURPHY, MAKE HIM GO. I'M SICK OF HIM.
MILES, DO WE HAVE TO FAX YOU THERE?
I THINK WE CAN GET BY WITHOUT YOU FOR SIX LOUSY DAYS.
YES, I KNOW.
OKAY... I'M GOING.
Corky: MILES...
AM I GLAD I CAUGHT YOU.
AND I HADN'T EVEN LEFT THE BUILDING.
I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO GIVE YOU THE LIST OF THINGS I WANT
FROM THE DUTY-FREE SHOP.
I WROTE THEM DOWN IN ORDER OF IMPORTANCE
BUT IF YOU GIVE YOURSELF ENOUGH TIME AT THE AIRPORT
YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET EVERYTHING.
I DEFINITELY NEED A BOTTLE OF SHALIMAR PERFUME--
NOT THE COLOGNE, NOT THE TOILET WATER
THE PERFUME.
THEY MAY TRY TO SELL YOU ONE OF THOSE BOXES WITH A LOT OF LITTLE PERFUMES IN IT.
I DON'T WANT THAT.
IF YOU GET IT, I'M T PAYING FOR IT.
NOW, THE NEXT THING...
HEY, GOT TO GO.
EVERYBODY, SAY GOOD-BYE TO MILES.
All: BYE, MILES.
OKAY, SEE YOU ON SHOW NIGHT.
MARV, I'M COUNTING ON YOU.
BOBBY, YOU GOT THE NEW GRAPHICS.
FRANK, IF THERE'S ANY...
GO! GO! GO!
YEAH, I TOLD YOU.
SHE STEPPED AWAY FROM HER DESK
(slowly:) STEPPED AWAY.
IT MEANS SHE'S NOT HERE, OKAY?
A MESSAGE?
OH, GREAT.
NOW I GOT TO FIND A PEN.
HI. DID I GET ANY CALLS?
DID YOU GET CALLS?
ALL DAY YOU GET CALLS
AND EVERYBODY WANTS SOMETHING.
LIKE I DON'T HAVE A LIFE TOO.
ANOTHER MESSAGE FROM MILES.
HE'S CALLED 27 TIMES IN SIX DAYS.
I'M THE ONE WHO NEEDS A VACATION.
HE'S COMING HOME TODAY.
THAT SHOULD EASE YOUR WORKLOAD.
I QUIT MY LAST JOB
BECAUSE I COULDN'T STAND THE PACE ANYMORE.
SO FAR, THIS ISN'T MUCH BETTER.
WHAT WAS YOUR LAST JOB?
18 YEARS AT THE D.M.V.
BLINK ALL YOU WANT, JERKFACE.
I'M ON A BREAK.
(with a French accent:) HELLO, MURPHY BROWN'S OFFICE.
AND WHOM SHALL I SAY IS CALLING?
GET OFF THE PHONE.
FRANK...
GET OFF THE PHONE.
YOU'LL THANK ME.
GET OFF THE PHONE!
SHE'S NOT HERE.
SHE'S AT THE CHEESE SHOP.
I'LL HAVE HER CALL YOU WHEN SHE GETS BACK.
THIS BETTER BE GOOD.
I HEARD FROM MY EARS AT THE PENTAGON
WORD IS, AN AMERICAN PILOT TOOK OFF WITH A FIGHTER JET.
FRANK, THAT'S NOT GET-OFF-THE-PHONE MATERIAL.
SO SOME COWBOY'S TAKING A JOYRIDE AT MACH ONE.
OH, YEAH? THIS COWBOY IS RIDING A JET LOADED WITH NUCLEAR WARHEADS
AND HE HAS NO INTENTION OF BRINGING IT BACK.
YOU'RE KIDDING. GOT ANY CONFIRMATION?
NOT YET, BUT I'M WORKING ON IT.
MURPHY, FRANK, I JUST HEARD SOMETHING.
I DON'T WANT TO TALK OUT OF SCHOOL.
NOTHING'S BEEN CONFIRMED.
WE CAN'T JUMP THE GUN ON MERELY HEARSAY AND RUMOR...
JIM, JUST CUT TO THE CHASE.
SOME BOZO STOLE A PLANE.
HE'S THREATENING TO BLOW UP ITS NUCLEAR MISSILES.
WAIT A MINUTE, A PILOT CAN'T DETONATE MISSILES HIMSELF. DOESN'T HE HAVE TO HAVE A CODE?
HE HAS THE CODE.
I WANT TO PUT A TEAM ON THIS RIGHT NOW.
FIND OUT HOW THE FAILSAFE SYSTEM BROKE DOWN.
GUYS, GET A LOAD OF WHAT JUST CAME IN OVER THE WIRE.
YEAH, WE KNOW.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?
IT'S YOUR CALL, JIM.
SCRAP TONIGHT'S SHOW.
PULL AS MANY PEOPLE AS WE NEED.
LET'S GO LIVE WITH THIS TONIGHT.
ALL RIGHT! YOU GOT IT.
(phone ringing)
MURPHY BROWN'S OFFICE.
AW, MILES.
REACH OUT AND TOUCH SOMEBODY ELSE.
I CAN'T TALK NOW.
HOLD ON.
NO, MURPHY, DON'T PUT ME ON HOLD!
TERRIFIC.
YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS JUST THINKING?
WHAT ARE THE CHANCES, OF ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD
YOU AND I WOULD BE PAIRED OFF IN A SING-ALONG?
NOW HERE WE ARE, BOTH OF US, STUCK IN THE TOBAGO AIRPORT.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
WE'RE SENDING MEN TO THE MOON AND ROCKETS TO NEPTUNE
AND THIS STUPID AIRLINE
CAN'T EVEN GET ME TO WASHINGTON ON TIME.
I'M GOING TO MISS THE BROADCAST.
I FIND YOUR WORK SO FASCINATING.
MY EX-BOYFRIEND NEIL WAS IN SALES.
SALES ATTRACTS PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PEOPLE.
HE WAS BASICALLY MANIPULATIVE, NOT LIKE YOU.
YOU KNOW, ROCHESTER ISN'T FAR FROM WASHINGTON.
I WENT ONCE, MY SENIOR YEAR IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I HAVEN'T BEEN BACK SINCE
BUT THEN, I NEVER HAD A REASON TO.
OKAY, AT 11:17, AIR FORCE PILOT MAJOR GLENN DIXON
TOOK OFF IN AN F-15 EAGLE FROM MacDILL AIR FORCE BASE.
AT 11:47, HE VEERED OFF COURSE OVER VENEZUELA AND RADIOED IN
THAT UNLESS HIS ESTRANGED WIFE, ONE BONNIE DIXON, RECONCILES WITH HIM
HE'LL DETONATE THE NUCLEAR DEVICES ON THE JET.
VERY GOOD.
CORKY, NICE JOB.
WHO'S YOUR SOURCE?
I JUST HAD LUNCH WITH A CONGRESSIONAL AIDE. HE TOLD ME EVERYTHING.
HE WANTS TO GET TO FIRST BASE--
LIKE HE HAS A PRAYER.
THE PENTAGON SPOKESMAN IS STONEWALLING.
YOU SHOULD HEAR HIS VOICE CRACK. IT'S AS GOOD AS A CONFIRMATION.
YOU'VE GOT A SOURCE AT THE DEFENSE DEPARTMENT.
CAN YOU FIND OUT WHERE THAT JET IS NOW?
I'M ON IT.
OH, DAMN, MILES.
IF YOU'RE CALLING TO HAVE ME CONFIRM
YOUR KOSHER MEAL ON THE PLANE ONE MORE TIME...
MURPHY, MY PLANE'S BEEN DELAYED.
I'M GOING TO MISS THE BROADCAST TONIGHT.
THIS IS A DISASTER.
I CAME THIS CLOSE TO GOING TO CANCUN, BUT NO, I HAD TO SAVE 50 BUCKS.
Miles, get a grip. We've got a major story here.
An Air Force pilot took a fighter jet.
He's threatening to blow up his warheads.
OH, JEEZ!
THE BIGGEST STORY OF THE YEAR
AND I'M STUCK IN A HOT, SWEATY AIRPORT WATCHING LUGGAGE SPIN.
LET ME PUT MORE CREAM ON THAT NOSE.
I'M IN HELL!
We're looking for the pilot.
Get back when you can.
I'D BE ON MY WAY NOW
IF THEY HADN'T CLOSED THE RUNWAY.
LET ME TELL YOU THIS-- I BETTER GET DOUBLE MILEAGE ON MY FREQUENT FLYER ACCOUNT
BECAUSE THEY DO NOT KNOW WHO THEY'RE DEALING WITH.
MURPHY, HOLD ON A MINUTE.
DO NOT HANG UP.
HI. IS THIS REALLY MURPHY BROWN?
I'M PHOEBE CRAMER.
I LOVE YOU, MURPHY.
YOU KNOW, I SAW YOU ON TV ONCE
WEARING THIS BURGUNDY SWEATER WITH BUTTONS ON THE SHOULDERS
SO I BOUGHT ONE
JUST LIKE IT.
DID YOU HAVE TROUBLE WITH THE BUTTON HOLES UNRAVELLING..?
WHAT KIND OF PLANE DID YOU SAY THAT PILOT HAS?
An F-15.
THE EAGLE-- THE LONG-RANGE TWIN ENGINE INTERCEPTOR WITH THE DUAL TAIL FINS?
WOW!
WHERE DID ALL THOSE TANKS COME FROM?
MURPHY, EITHER THEY'RE HAVING A VERY SMALL AIR SHOW
OR I KNOW WHERE THAT PILOT LANDED.
Phil: LUNCH!
(cheering)
EGG SALAD SANDWICHES.
(groaning)
HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY. YOU WANT 30 SANDWICHES IN 30 MINUTES
THAT'S WHAT YOU GET.
BUT I SLICED THE PICKLE.
I DON'T DO THAT FOR JUST ANY OUTFIT.
YOU GUYS MUST FEEL PRETTY GOOD.
THE NIGHTLINE GUYS ARE CRYING IN THEIR BEER
ABOUT HOW YOU ACED THEM.
WE GOT LUCKY.
WE GOT MILES ON THE ISLAND AND AN HOUR OF LIVE TELEVISION IN PRIME TIME.
NOW WE GOT TO MAKE IT WORK.
SOME VACATION MILES TOOK, HUH?
IF THAT BOMB GOES OFF
ALL THE SUN BLOCK IN THE WORLD
WON'T SAVE HIM.
(phone ringing)
MURPHY BROWN'S OFFICE.
MILES!
GUYS, IT'S MILES.
TELL US WHAT'S GOING ON THERE?
THEY'RE EVACUATING THE ISLAND.
ALMOST EVERYONE'S GONE EXCEPT SOME GUARDS
A FEW TANKS, ME...
AND A LUNATIC WITH AN H-BOMB.
I WANT YOU TO LISTEN TO ME VERY CAREFULLY.
NOBODY HAS TO BE A HERO.
IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT, IT'S OKAY.
I know that.
BUT THIS IS A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME SITUATION.
THIS IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT RIGHT?
THEY'RE BOARDING MY FLIGHT
I COULD STAY WITH YOU.
NO!
I MEAN, THANKS ANYWAY, PHOEBE, BUT IT'S TOO DANGEROUS.
I CAN'T ALLOW THE RISKS THAT I TAKE
IN MY LINE OF WORK TO HURT INNOCENT PEOPLE.
MY DEAR, SWEET, BRAVE MILES.
ALWAYS THINKING OF OTHERS
EVEN IF IT MEANS HAVING TO FACE THIS ALONE.
JUST THINK, MILES
I COULD BE THE LAST WOMAN YOU'LL EVER SEE.
Murphy: Miles?
I'M HERE, I'M HERE.
HAS ANYBODY APPROACHED THE FIGHTER?
No.
THERE'S SOME BIGWIGS HERE--
AIR FORCE AND STATE DEPARTMENT.
THEY'RE IN THE CONTROL TOWER.
I COULDN'T GET PAST THE GUARD.
HE'S HAVING TROUBLE
GETTING PAST THE GUARD
MILES, THIS IS WHAT YOU DO.
MAKE A CONNECTION WITH HIM.
IF HE HAS A BROTHER, YOU HAVE A BROTHER.
IF HIS FAMILY'S FROM A SMALL VILLAGE, YOUR FAMILY'S FROM A SMALL VILLAGE.
GET HIS TRUST, THEN BRIBE HIM.
GO FOR HIS EGO, MILES. TELL HIM YOU'LL PUT HIM ON THE AIR.
FORGET THE GUARD.
THERE'VE GOT TO BE PEOPLE GOING IN AND OUT OF THE CONTROL TOWER.
MAKE CONTACT WITH ONE OF THEM. PUSH YOUR WAY IN, BUT DON'T BE TOO AGGRESSIVE.
BUT DON'T SCARE THEM OFF.
TRY THE LOCALS. WHAT ABOUT THE WIFE?
Is she there yet?
Is there a time limit?
SLOW DOWN! SLOW DOWN!
OKAY, THAT'S IT. FRANK AND JIM HAVE TO GO NOW.
DON'T YOU, FRANK AND JIM?
YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB, BUDDY. GOT TO RUN.
WONDERFUL JOB. TRULY.
I'M STILL HERE, MILES.
NOW, I'M GOING TO SAY THIS ONE MORE TIME.
THIS IS TOUGH, EVEN FOR A SEASONED REPORTER.
MAYBE YOU SHOULD GET OUT WHILE YOU HAVE THE CHANCE.
LOOK, MURPHY, I HEAR THINGS AROUND THE OFFICE.
I KNOW SOME PEOPLE DON'T THINK OF ME AS A REAL JOURNALIST.
THEY THINK I'M JUST A PENCIL-PUSHER.
I WANT THIS STORY.
IT'S IMPORTANT TO ME.
THEN DO IT, MILES. GET INTO THAT CONTROL TOWER.
WE ALL KNOW YOU CAN DO IT.
I'LL TALK TO YOU ON THE PHONE AGAIN TONIGHT.
ON THE AIR.
Stage manager: LISTEN UP, PEOPLE.
WE START WITH MILES
THEN FRANK AT THE PENTAGON
GO TO MURPHY'S PRE-TAPED INTERVIEW FROM THE STATE DEPARTMENT
AND FINISH WITH CORKY'S PIECE.
UNBELIEVABLE. WE STILL DON'T KNOW HOW THE PILOT GOT THOSE DETONATION CODES.
THE PUBLIC DEPENDS ON US FOR FACTS,
YET MINUTES BEFORE WE'RE TO GO ON THE AIR
WE'RE STRUGGLING TO PULL INFORMATION FROM 100 PLACES, OUR RESOURCES PUSHED TO THE LIMIT.
DOES IT GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS?
OH, DID ANYBODY GET MILES' PICTURE TO THE BOOTH?
I FOUND ONE IN HIS OFFICE.
MILES, WHAT ELSE DO YOU HAVE?
Just some stuff about a Defense Department task force
and a few quotes from some locals. Doesn't feel like much.
You would have made it into the control tower.
WELL, THAT'S ME.
WHATEVER YOU HAVE, I'M SURE WILL BE FINE.
IS THAT MILES?
YEAH.
TELL HIM OUR PRAYERS ARE WITH HIM
AND WE'RE PROUD OF HIM--
GIVING THE WORLD A CLOSE-UP ACCOUNT
OF AN EVENT THAT COULD WREAK ENVIRONMENTAL HAVOC
AND TELL HIM THAT EVEN IF HE BLOWS IT COMPLETELY
WE'LL STILL LOVE HIM.
CORKY SAYS "HI."
ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE, TAKE YOUR PLACES.
THIS IS IT.
GOOD LUCK.
GOING LIVE, IN FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO...
(F.Y.I. theme song)
GOOD EVENING.
WELCOME TO A SPECIAL EDITION OF F.Y.I.
FOR YOUR INFORMATION TONIGHT, SOMETHING OUT OF A MOVIE--
SOMETHING THE EXPERTS SAID COULDN'T HAPPEN--
IS TAKING PLACE ON THE SMALL ISLAND OF TOBAGO.
AN AIR FORCE FIGHTER PILOT
DESPONDENT OVER THE BREAKUP OF HIS MARRIAGE
IS HOLDING THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE A NUCLEAR HOSTAGE.
ONLY ONE NEWSMAN, F.Y.I.'S EXECUTIVE PRODUCER, MILES SILVERBERG
IS AT THE AIRPORT IN TOBAGO.
IN THIS EXCLUSIVE LIVE REPORT
HE TALKS BY PHONE TO MURPHY BROWN.
MILES, WE'VE ALL HEARD THE OFFICIAL REPORTS
COMING OUT OF THE WHITE HOUSE AND THE PENTAGON
BUT YOU ALONE ARE THERE AT THE SCENE.
TELL US, WHAT IS HAPPENING AT THE AIRPORT?
Well, Murphy...
Operator: Please deposit an additional $1.15 for the next minute.
Miles: What? I don't have...
(dial tone)
I CAN MAKE YOU RING.
I CAN MAKE YOU RING...
RIGHT NOW!
I CAN MAKE YOU RING...
RIGHT... RIGHT...
NOW!
I CAN MAKE YOU MELT.
(rings)
MILES?
MILES! GUYS, IT'S MILES.
Before you jump on me, I thought I had enough change.
Beads up the wazoo, but no change.
I tried to call collect, but there's not a single operator left on the island.
HOW ARE YOU CALLING NOW?
I saw this car phone in one of the jeeps
so I borrowed it.
WAY TO GO, MILES.
WE GOT MILES HOOKED UP. WE'RE GOING LIVE.
WAIT A MINUTE.
MILES, REMEMBER, YOU CAN DO THIS.
I'M HERE TO WALK YOU THROUGH IT.
IN FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO...
WE'VE RECONNECTED WITH F.Y.I.'S MILES SILVERBERG
THE ONLY NEWSMAN ON THE SCENE IN TOBAGO.
HE NOW TALKS WITH MURPHY BROWN.
MILES, CAN YOU DESCRIBE THE SCENE FOR US?
Murphy, it's been over 12 hours
and the pilot is still holding his ground
aboard the F-15 Eagle.
There is an eerie stillness.
The scene's so quiet you'd think even the birds have left the island.
I'm on the runway.
WHAT?
YOU'RE WHERE?
In a jeep, about ten feet
from the waiting jet.
WHAT'S HE DOING? HE'S CRAZY.
TELL US, MILES, HOW DID YOU GET THERE?
I saw a jeep.
I got into it.
I drove it real fast.
OH, MY GOD...
I can see Major Dixon inside the cockpit.
He's spotted me.
I am holding up my press card.
He's raising the hatch.
A GOOD REPORTER LIKE YOURSELF DOESN'T NEED TO BE REMINDED
THAT FREQUENTLY, THESE PEOPLE ARE IN NO MOOD TO TALK.
Major Dixon!
My name is Miles Silverberg!
I have a live hookup to the States.
If you speak loudly
you can send a message to your wife.
Dixon: Can you hear me?
WE CAN HEAR HIM.
Miles: We can!
How are you doing in there?
Dixon: Right now, I'd kill for some orange Gatorade
and Charlie Pride on the headset.
Miles: Major, why did you steal the jet?
Dixon: If you know a better way to get my wife's attention
I'd like to hear it.
She won't take my calls, answer my letters...
Hell, I even sent her flowers.
BIG DEAL.
Miles: Is there anything you'd like to say to your wife now?
Dixon: Bonnie...
I love you.
If you're going to leave me
just give me a chance to talk to you first.
Just talk to me
and I'll climb down out of this plane.
That's it.
That's all I have to say for now.
Miles: Thank you, Major.
A man who loves his wife.
This story isn't so complicated.
Murphy?
BACK TO YOU, JIM.
WE'LL CONTINUE WITH THIS SPECIAL EDITION OF F.Y.I.--
TOBAGO: TIME BOMB OF TERROR-- AFTER THIS.
WE ARE INTO COMMERCIAL.
(cheering)
Miles: And as the hatch closes
a light rain begins to fall
upon the giant bird of destruction--
a gentle rain that lets linger the fateful question
whether innocent babes of this island may return
to suckle of mother's milk, safely come the morn...
GOD, I HATE THE DAY AFTER A BIG STORY.
SUCH A LETDOWN.
THE RUSH OF ADRENALINE, GONE.
YOUR STEP, SLOWER.
FACE IT-- A MADMAN WITH A WARHEAD CAN REALLY SPOIL YOU.
HI, GUYS.
ALL HAIL THE CONQUERING HERO!
WE'RE SO GLAD YOU'RE HOME.
MILES, GOT TO HAND IT TO YOU, YOU MADE IT THROUGH SOME HAIRY MOMENTS THERE, BUDDY.
IT'S FUNNY.
AFTER TALKING TO HIM, I FELT CONFIDENT HE'D SURRENDER.
I WASN'T AFRAID.
YOU COULD BE RADIOACTIVE DUST
CONTAMINATING SOMEBODY'S DRINKING WATER.
I'VE BEEN IN SITUATIONS
THAT WEREN'T HALF AS BAD AND I'VE BEEN AFRAID.
GREAT, BECAUSE I WAS SCARED OUT OF MY MIND.
MY LEGS WERE RUBBER
MY STOMACH WAS CLAMPING UP, I WAS SWEATING EVERYWHERE...
HAVE SOME PRIDE, MILES.
I WANT YOU ALL TO KNOW IT REALLY HELPED
KNOWING YOU WERE BACK HERE, SUPPORTING ME.
THANKS.
MURPHY.
MILES.
SO WHAT DID YOU THINK?
NICE JOB.
I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT.
THANKS.
WAIT A MINUTE.
IT'S NOT TRUE.
I DIDN'T THINK YOU COULD DO IT, MILES.
I DIDN'T THINK YOU HAD IT IN YOU.
I WAS WRONG.
YOU WERE REALLY GREAT OUT THERE.
REALLY GREAT.
RIGHT NOW, I FEEL LIKE I CAN HANDLE ANYTHING.
(elevator bell rings)