Monsters (1988–1990): Season 1, Episode 4 - The Vampire Hunter - full transcript

Can the famous vampire hunter save his friend before his old enemy can kill the young man, or worse, turn him into another bloodsucker?

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

[FATHER SIGHS]

[EXCLAIMING IN ANNOYANCE]

[UTENSILS CLATTERING]

Honey, it's family hour.
There must be something on.

DAUGHTER:
Oh, wow, Candy Critters!

[FATHER EXCLAIMS]

Oh, great. It's Monsters,
our favorite show!

[MONSTROUS LAUGH]

Shh, it's starting.



[SCARY MUSIC PLAYS]

[MONSTROUS LAUGH]

[FATHER CHUCKLES]

[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING]

Why even think
about retiring?

Boredom.

Where are you going this time?

Well, first Egypt.

My friend, Hawkins
has unearthed a new feral,

and then, my boy,
I'm off to Vienna.

To meet this marvelous,
marvelous old lechery

induces highly strung
young ladies to publicize
their naughty dreams.

Sigmund Freud?

And he calls it a science.
I can hardly wait.



But it's nothing compared
with vampire hunting.

You are the scourge
of the undead.

Now, white-livered cowards
I have come to detest.

No, Jack,
I'm sick of that.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Yes, Mrs. Haggerty.

A Miss Warren is here.

Show her in, show her in.

There. You can't leave
a pressing new case.

Oh, another lonely widow
seeking to contact
the spirit world, my boy.

Mr. Chariot.

I need your help.

I think I am posed,
Mr. Chariot.

No, no, no, not at all.

We have all the time
in the world.

Why do you think a vampire
would prey on your brother,
Miss Warren?

To obtain
our considerable fortune.

They live forever, don't they?
Must get quite expensive.

Yes, quite.

And you brother
you say has changed?

He cannot bear the daylight
and he never comes to Church.

How does he feel
about these?

They make him quite nervous.

I fear the heat
will make you faint. May I?

What can I do for you,
Miss Warren?

Come to my home
and examine my brother

as you've examined me.

Because I swear to you,
his soul is in mortal danger.

And so is my own.

There's no one else with
your skill and reputation.
Please.

I told you before,
Miss Warren,

I'm about to leave on
an extended vacation.

I'll pay you. Anything.

[SIGHS]

MISS WARREN: I understand.

So sorry to have
taken your time.

No, not at all.

Ah!

Could it be?

Could it be?
Could it be?

Won't you help her?

Are you taken with her, Jack?

No, I don't blame you.
I don't blame you at all.

No, she is quite something.

This isn't a joke!
You have to call her back.

My dear Jack,
I wouldn't touch her problem
with a ten-foot pole.

It is far too dangerous for me.

It's not the vampire
who's the coward after all,
is it?

[DOOR SLAMS]
Hmm?

MRS. HAGGERTY:
Nothing like a spot
of warm milk.

Make you feel sleepy
as a new born pup.

Thank you, Mrs. Haggerty.

[SIGHS]

I hope you don't
mind me butting in
a little to say

whatever it is
twixt you and Mr. Ernest,

'tis sure to blow over.

Like showers
in the spring time.

[CHUCKLES]

He loves you like a son,
Master Jack.

Of course it'll blow over.

It was nothing.

Oh!

Find a penny,
pick it up.

All the day
you'll have good luck.

You keep it.

[CLOCK TOWER CHIMING]

[VEHICLE PASSING BY]

Wait!

Tonight. I know it's tonight.

Please, calm yourself.

Now what is it?

Gerald, my brother,
he sent the servants away.

He's locked himself
in the basement.

And these voices,
terrible voices...

I saw him
dragging in a coffin.

And I thought I heard a bat.
And the voices,
terrible voices.

I'll call my uncle.
No.

He doesn't believe me.

He'll force you to stay,
and I thought...

I thought I saw in your eyes
that you'd help me.

Miss Warren...
Mara.

Mara.

I'll do whatever I can.

Let me help you.

Shall I?

It's all right.

[VEHICLE APPROACHING]

[CREAKING]

[LEVER SQUEAKING]

[CHAIN RATTLING]

Bon sous.

[DOOR CREAKING SHUT]

Welcome.

No!

Well done, my love.

My name is Charles...

[LAUGHING]
You can't hurt him.

Enough.

[GASPING]

As I was about to say,

my name is Charles Pool.

I'm an old friend
of Ernest Chariot's.

[CHARLES LAUGHING]

You are magnificent.

I adore you.

Very soon, my love.

Thanks to you

I'll have my revenge
on the mortal
who did this to me.

Charles,

what about the boy?

He never did anything.

When Chariot comes,
we can let him go?

No.

That's not how we do it,
my love.

You must think of him
as a feast.

The center piece
of our carousel.

[SINISTER MUSIC PLAYING]

Don't, Charles.

CHARLES: You don't understand.

But you will.

Trust me.

One small service more

and I will give you
every gift that I own.

You'll be immortal like me.

Then you'll know the truth.

That we are divinity to them.

Our beauty
ravishes their hearts.

And in the moment
that they die,

they love us.

Rotten selfish men!

They leave first thing
in the morning, and I don't
know when they're coming back.

They don't tell me
where they're going.

[CRYING]
It's scaring me all silly.

"Mrs. Haggerty,
I already have a mother.
She lives in Cambridge!"

Mrs. Haggerty,

what did that suit of armor
ever do to you?

Oh. Oh, Mr. Ernest,

where have you been?

I have been in Lowell
working in a cotton mill.

It wreaks havoc on the hands.

I've been investigating
our wonderful Miss Warren.

And as I suspected,

she is not quite
the sophisticated young
lady she appears to be.

But I think
I'm onto her game.

[STAMMERS]
But Mr. Jack's not with you?

No, Mr. Jack is not with me.

Why, isn't he here?

Speak quickly.
Gone.

How long?

Two days!

All right, Mrs. Haggerty,
now quietly and easily,

there is a constable
on the corner.

He's headed
towards Beacon Hill.

I want you to run
and catch him
and bring him here.

Now, Mrs. Haggerty!

You won't need
the constable, Mr. Chariot.

You friend is at my home.

Unfortunately,
he's taken quite ill.

He begs you to come.

No.

Not the gun, either.

Oh.

Did you learn that
in Church, Miss Warren?

Or at the mill
with the other ladies?

Who is your master?

My friend.
You'll see soon enough.

Oh, don't you fool yourself.
You are his slave.

And you're all the more
contemptible because
you consent.

You sleep with him
in his stinking coffin?

Hypocrite!

Oh, I know your kind.

You proper gentlemen
with your fine ways.

You think you own the world
and the rest of us aren't
fit to breathe your air.

Well, Charles Pool
is a finer gentleman than you.

And what you did to him,

you deserve
everything you get.

Hello, Charles.

Little game of hide and seek?

[CHARLES LAUGHING]

Welcome, Ernest.

I've waited a long time
for you, Ernest.

Well, in better accommodations
than these, I trust.

He has no weapons?

Ernest,

think about how
I'm going to kill you.

When I take you

I want to taste your fear.

Charles.

Oh, Charles.

See, you're still making
the same mistake with me.

You're the one
who's afraid to die.

[CHARLES LAUGHING]

That's absurd.

I've been dead 300 years.

No, undead, because you
are a white-livered coward.

Don't bait me, Chariot.

Bait you?

Bait you? You crawl
into a putrid box

every morning to hide
from death!

[GROANS]

I've always hated
your sermonizing.

All right, then end it
but let Jack Avery go.

Not possible, my friend.

ERNEST: Come on.

Come on, Charles.

This isn't sporting.

Who says?

Where is he?

God only knows.

Look, I lived up
to my part of the bargain.

Help the boy.

It's hopeless.

Mara, listen to me,
listen to me, listen to me!

They told me about you
at the cotton mills.
So much spirit, so much pride.

You could never
accept the drudgery,
all of the abuse.

You knew right from wrong,
you stood up to them.

Are you about
to beg her, Ernest?

Mara, he'll sink you
into a life of evil,

of hideous cruelty.

This is too rich.

I can't.

You can. You can,
you can go back.

It's not too late.

Don't let yourself
become like him.

Don't let yourself become...

[CHARLES SCREAMING]
...like him!

Listen to me.

You wanna know
where Jack is, Ernest?

He's a Jack in the box.

No!

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

[YELLS]

[GUNSHOT]

Unkind.

Unkind.

[SCREAMING]

[SLAPS]

You won't get away
this time, Ernest.

I'm going to eat you up.

[GROANS]

[SCREAMS]

[THUD]

Put the mask back on.

Please.

[GASPING]

[EXHALES]

I'm sorry.

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]