Monroe (2011–2012): Season 2, Episode 5 - Episode #2.5 - full transcript

Some things are never going to work.
It worked fine, didn't it?

I'm really sorry.
I slept with Shepherd.

One minute I was asking her to marry
me and the next I was at the door
with a suitcase in my hand.

I'm missing part of the story here.
I slept with someone else.
I slept with Witney.

I even feel sorry for Springer.

Any mistake in this job can
rob the patient of their previous
life.

Any mistake you make in this job can
result in catastrophe.

Every mistake apart from one.

Ah.

Would you mind being more specific?
It isn't a tumour?

Well, praise the Lord. It isn't.



It's an abscess.
So what do we do now?

Take a second to enjoy this moment
because the good mistakes don't come
along very often.

So I haven't got a tumour?

You never had a tumour.
I never had one?

No. You had an abscess.
And?

That's what we saw on the scan and
thought was a tumour.

You mean like those nut jobs who see
a satellite and think it's a UFO?

It's good to have a sense of humour
about these things.

Yeah? Maybe you've taken my sense of
humour out along with the abscess.

Go back to her and sort it out. You
know. Lie if you have to.

To her. To yourself.

And that's it? That's the sum total
of your advice?

What can I say? I'm not the Dalai
Lama. Yeah, I'd noticed.

I'm trying. All right?



Living with me? You call that
trying?

She didn't exactly beg me to stay.
You had a one-night stand!

Live with it and stop blaming how
bad you feel on her.

It's not fair. She loves you.
Put it right.

Starting now. Go on.

Um...

Are we still going to Relate
tomorrow?

Do you still want to go?
Yeah. Yeah, I do. I do.

I... I want to sort this out and I
think that's probably the only way of
doing it.

Good. So do I.

I hope that's your alibi you're
working on, Springer!

"Mental torture"?

He must have a very imaginative
lawyer.

He said you led him to believe he had
a brain tumour.

It wasn't as though he didn't need a
brain operation.

That does rather resemble a garage
mechanic's alibi.

Wilson, anything to add?

An MRI DWI sequence would have
helped to spot the difference.

Thank you. Did you check that,
Springer?

It was entirely my fault.

A misdiagnosis. And it happens
sometimes.

But I hold up my hands to it. What
can I say?

"Sorry." In writing. And quickly.

I think his lawyer is all sizzle and
no steak.

They used to say that on Murder One.
I've waited years to use it.

I admit, Springer, I was impressed
with your honesty.

Ah, nothing can touch me. I wake up
every morning with a smile on my
face.

It's the expression on Witney's face
you need to worry about.

It's usually a look of deep and
lasting gratitude.

Wilson, give me one good reason not
to run out of this hospital
screaming right now.

Bridget Addy, 45.

Suffers from epilepsy long term

but the fits are suddenly getting
difficult to control.

Various anti-epilepsy drugs have been
tried and failed.

She was finally referred to neurology
two months ago.

They did an EEG, a CT scan and an
MRI.

They conducted an angiogram, and
she's due a Wada Test.

Are there any more tests they can do
on this poor woman?

Can we make some up?
No.

She's pretty much tested out.

What you have is known as cortical
dysplasia.

It just means that the neurons are
all knotted up and not working
properly. Right.

We will remove them and it will help
seizure control.

It may even stop them altogether.

I'll be working near a part of the
brain called Broca's area.

The speech centre.

So when we are doing the actual
operation,

you will be awake and we will be
able to check on your speech.

Awake? How do you mean?

We'll put you to sleep to remove
your skull

and then wake you up again when we
do the actual operation.

How does she mean? Awake?

Well... it's a bit weird but you get
used to it.

And in my experience, it's nice to
be the centre of attention.

Let me tell you something, love.

When you've come round outside the
supermarket, lying in your own pee,

with people thinking you're drunk,

that "centre of attention" thing is
not really all it's cracked up to be.

Fair enough.

I'll see you on the ward later. We
will leave you with Lizzie.

Friends, family, arrogant surgeons -
she can handle anyone.

Is your husband gonna come and see
you? Ex-husband.
Split up six months ago.

No prizes for guessing why.
Couldn't handle your epilepsy?

Well, my cooking wasn't brilliant
either but...

It's a tough thing to go through on
your own. You got anybody else?

No, not really.

Shall I tell your ex to come in and
see you? I don't suppose Gary
Barlow's available, is he?

Your second date with Lizzie.

I've nailed it.
Stop giving him false hope.

A fondue evening.

Yeah, that could work.
It says casual.

It says fun. It says sharing. It says
cheese.

If I hoped to date Wallace and
Gromit, cheese would be the answer.

Never underestimate the allure of
fondue.

How long's she been on the waiting
list? Ah... four years.

But the last six months she has
deteriorated and she's on the active
list so...

The transplant coordinator is happy
if we are.

Where's the heart from?
Manchester.

Be a blow for multiculturalism -
Lancastrian heart in a Yorkshire
lass.

Mullery, anything to add?
Not really.

Have we got a bed?
No.

But the old chap in No.4 is looking
distinctly peaky.

Could we just find a bed without
resorting to euthanasia?

OK, keep me posted on the ETA for
the heart.

Thank you, everybody. Good luck.

You are going to have to be more
assertive.

Give your opinion.

I thought being good at my job was
enough. Are you OK?

I've got A & Es stacking up.

So, Grace.

I think we can allow ourselves to
get a little bit excited.

The heart's on its way and
everything looks set for the
transplant.

Can't believe it, Jenny. After all
this time!

So we need to get you ready as soon
as possible.

It's not gonna be like last time?
I don't want her to go through that
again.

I will be checking the heart myself

and we'll prep you but we won't
anaesthetise you or move you onto
theatre

until we're absolutely sure the
operation will go ahead.

You know what people say to her?
Must be great to lay around doing
nothing.

If you want me to act out every
episode of One Tree Hill, I'm happy
to do so.

Well, maybe later. Uh...

Now you're 18 you get to sign your
own consent form.

There you are.

There she is.

Sorry, love. You've got the wrong
feller.

That woman is not your ex-wife?

She's my ex-wife all right. That's
why I'm the wrong feller.

She won't want to see me and I don't
want to see her.

She hasn't got anybody else.
That's not my fault. Not any more.

How long were you married for?
20 years.

Years one and eight were not
unhappy.

And, on reflection, year 12 had its
moments.

For 20 years, she washed your
underpants.

Tomorrow somebody's gonna take a
chisel to her skull.

Least you can do is be there to hold
her hand.

I think you may have got the wrong
impression about Monroe, you know.

What impression's that, then?

You know. Loud mouth.

The "big I am". Joker in the pack.

Ego merchant. Problem gambler.

Emotionally crippled. Shagabout.
Charming... until he's launched you.

Wandering eyebrows. That's just the
surface stuff.

And what's your point?
I'm just saying...

it's not what he's really like, deep
down... apart from the eyebrows.

Right. Well, thanks for the
reference. I'll be in touch.

Hidden depths.

This is best place for goodbyes.

See you soon.

I love you.

Told you I'd be here. You OK?

Can I change my mind?

We've had a good look at the heart
and it's all good.

Got no last-minute hitches, then?
No last-minute hitches.

That's a shame.

I don't think I want this. Any of it.

I can't do this. I'm sorry. I just
can't.

Is this normal?
Yes.

Grace has been waiting a long time

and now that it's finally happening
she's coming to terms

with the fact that she's about to
have major surgery.

Maybe we should talk to her.

No, no, no. I think I'll be able to
reassure her.

How long has she got to make her
mind up?

Oh, a little while yet. I wouldn't
worry. It'll be fine.

How long have we got?
Half an hour at the outside.

Cup of tea.
Yep. No problem.

Oh, Bradley tells me you've got
hidden depths.

Oh, God. He didn't get more specific
than that?

No. Don't worry. Although I'm
suspecting uh...

stamp collecting and brass rubbings.

Just for the record. He didn't
mention fondue?

No. Definitely not. I would have
remembered that.

It's like...

It's like something in the back of my
mind, rattling away.

Like a window you've left open when
you've gone to bed.

Does that make any sense?

I know that this is hard for you to
get used to,

but it really is the best chance
you're gonna get.

How old was he?

The donor. The boy who died?

16.

What must his mum and dad be going
through?

Hell.

Real hell.

But they still agreed to have his
organs harvested.

I'm so scared.

Shall I let you into a little
secret?

A heart transplant...

It isn't actually that difficult.

Right. So are you saying this is
gonna be easy?

You've been through much tougher
operations.

The second time we fixed that leaky
valve, that was... That was
challenging.

No, this is... Well, this is just
stitching, really.

And stitching is very much up there
on my list of... superpowers.

In an ideal world, how long have I
got... to make my mind up?

In an ideal world?

I'd have started operating about 20
minutes ago.

Hello, Emily. How are you doing?

So how you been keeping?
Good, yeah. You?

Had a bit of a toothache a while
back, like, but it cleared up all by
itself.

Hospital visitor standards are really
slipping.

I wouldn't want my real husband here
if I was going through this, let
alone my ex.

Do you think Anna would want you by
her bedside?

Of course she would. Her boyfriend's
a vet. I'm not sure what use he'd be.

Unless she had distemper.

Huh.

Do you want anything bringing in?
Wouldn't mind a Puzzler magazine.

And some fruit. Yeah, OK. No
problem. Consider it done.

I'll get the money off you when I
work out how much it all comes to,
shall I?

That's good of you.

This gentleman needs to see me now.

Oh, right, yeah. Don't want to be in
the way.

I just need to double check. Do you
mind? You've had anaesthetic
before?

Yes.

If that's your Clint Eastwood stare,
you need to work on it, love.

Just a word before we begin.
What?

Don't worry. You've not done anything
wrong.

But you should know that this is a
counter-intuitive operation.

Cutting out a heart.

It's well within your skill range...

but it goes against every instinct
you've nurtured as a heart surgeon.

You might find it a bit unsettling.

So, how will you proceed?

Midline sternotomy.

Open up the pericardium. Give the
heparin.

Usual arterial cannulation, bicaval
venous cannulae.

Go on bypass. Cross-clamp the aorta.
Start explanting the heart.

Then we place the new heart into the
thoracic cavity and start suturing
for our lives.

For her life. We start suturing for
her life.

Yes. Yes, exactly so.

Stupid machine!

You all right, mate?

I'm trying to get change for the
parking meter. Ah, there's a knack.

Thanks for coming to see Bridget, by
the way.

It must be awkward.
You don't know the half of it.

My girlfriend thinks I'm out doing
the big shop.

Well, at least you got the crisps.

It's just um...

I walked. You know.

It's hard seeing her like this
without feeling like a bit of a
bastard.

Why do you feel like that? Are you a
bit of a bastard?

No, no, it's just cos I left her,
you know, and she's er...

you know, she's doing the old
er... mystery dance.

You're right.

You should have stayed with her out
of pity. Women love that.

All right. Good. I think we're ready
to take it out.

You do the honours, Miss Witney.

I told you it would feel wrong.

It's such an empty space. It's
like...

I don't want to know what it's like.

I want you to deal with it and get
on with the job.

Good.

Right, we'll start with the 4-0
Prolene, please.

Thank you.

Jill, Call Monroe.

OK.

Let's remove the aortic clamp and see
what we've got.

Nothing yet.

It can sometimes take a few minutes
before it starts to beat.

How long has it been going on?
Just over a minute.

Still nothing.

How long has that had no rhythm?
Four minutes.

OK.

Let's er... wind up the infusion rate
on the Dobutamine

and give a bolus dose of adrenaline.
Looks like she's gonna need a bit of
help.

Come on.

Come on.

Good. OK. We're getting a rhythm.
That's good.

OK. Let's check for bleeding.

And no more whooping, thank you. I
find it affected and distracting.

Should we postpone her operation?
Postpone it?

I'd do it right now if I could.

Why don't we wait till her fits
settle down? If she has a fit during
surgery...

We operate when fits become frequent
and destructive. What you've seen.

Would you describe it as destructive?
Yes, but...

And we know that they're frequent.

If she has a fit during surgery,
we'll handle it.

After all, I do have the most
overqualified trainee on the planet.

That was good work, Miss Witney.
Thank you.

I thought we weren't going to have a
happy ending for a few minutes.

Risks of pneumonia, eternal wound
infection, renal failure,

acute rejection and urinary
infection in the first 30 days.

I know. I was just saying.

The happy ending is when Grace dies
in her bed aged 90.

So the only happy ending any of us
can look forward to is a peaceful
death?

So far, in my experience. Yes,
that's about right.

Why? Do you have a better version?

Grace?

Grace.

How are you feeling?

Tired.

She's... She's still feeling a bit
groggy but that's to be expected.

But she's doing very well.

We'll try and get her back on the
ward as soon as we can

but obviously after an operation
like this we've got to keep her
clear of infection.

But it's all looking very good.
Thank you.

Yes. Thank you. Sorry.

No, don't be silly.

She's your child...

and you're entitled.

Miss Witney, a word.

What you did in the operating theatre
today...

that's what's important. Right?

Right.

And you are very, very good at it,
and you clearly love it.

So...

without putting too fine a point on
it, don't let anything get in your
way.

He has to be the love of your life.

What?

If he is not the love of your life,
then end it now.

Because having a relationship at work
is...

Well, let's just say... that unless
Springer is the love of your life,

he just isn't worth the pain.

Me and Springer, it's just -
Ah, you see, it can't be "just"...

And what started out as "just"
becomes...

What started as flirting in a
corridor...

ends in a draughty room, talking to
a stranger about your feelings

when we really don't know what our
feelings even are.

I'm just trying to save you from an
unholy mess.

I don't really...

I'm sorry. I don't know what to say.

Well, there's no need to look quite
so panic-stricken.

I know I broke my own rules and got
personal but I just thought in this
instance...

I won't let it distract me from
being a good surgeon.

Good. Good. I'm sure you won't.

I have paper. I have coloured pens.
I have stickers.

Do you have alcohol? Try and be a
bit more enthusiastic.

Doing the seating plan might be the
most enjoyable bit about the
wedding.

I'm not sitting next to Uncle Billy.

He still does that death grip thing
on my knee and finds sweets behind
my ear.

Oh, put him next to me.

I find the combination of death grip
and mint imperials strangely
alluring.

Now you tell me.

No, I am very kindly putting you
next to Dave.

Dave won't be coming to the wedding.

Really?

He seemed so keen.

Dave and I...

Dave wasn't over his previous
girlfriend.

Oh. Right. I'm sorry.

And I find myself believing that I
really am sorry. I am.

I think we both realised that we
wanted to have a relationship again

but not necessarily with each other.

Ah... a sort of transition thing.

Yeah. But more than that.

You know, for me it was a relief to
know I could enjoy having sex again.

Ah... Hm.

I'm glad you said, "again".

I worry that Louis is the reason that
Lawrence wants to come back.

And I suppose I want to hear him say
that he wants to come back for me.

Lawrence, do you feel able to talk
about your reasons for wanting to go
back?

I would have thought it was obvious.

Not to Jenny. Not to me.

If you feel you are going back for
your son,

what do you think that says about
your relationship?

What do you think Jenny might take
from that?

How do you feel about that?

Do you feel you can manage to talk
about that?

I'm sorry. Sorry.

Lawrence? Lawrence?

Sorry. Sorry.
No, it's all right.

It's all right. It's not all right.
It's not all right.

It's not all right.
What is it?

I don't know. I don't know. This.

But I'm sorry.

Surprise. I've got a cheeky little
Beaujolais.

It's young but highly quaff able, as I
might say if I was trying to annoy
Monroe.

Or you.

I've annoyed you, haven't I?
No. No, it's not you. It's just...

If you don't mind...

I just need an early night.

On my own.

Oh. Right. Sure.

I should have called. Or texted.

Or something.

I'm sorry.

Night.
Yes. Night.

Well, this isn't how I imagined any
of this would happen.

Me neither. Have you seen their
present list? It's so sensible.

Why can't they ask for a brass bed,
some throws and a bong?

Because they're not living in an
Austin Powers movie.

Hello.

Yeah. I'll be right out.

Well, that's me. Good night.
Good night.

Mm.

Ahh...

Oh.

If this goes where I think it might
go, you know...

in the morning, we may well hate
ourselves.

Well... Gabriel,

I'm seriously impressed.

Looks like you've finally grown up.

Yeah.

It was bound to happen sometime.

Gabriel.
Mm-hm?

Do you mind if I go over this side?
I do, actually.

Um... I always sleep on this side.

Really?
Mm-hm.

You haven't slept on that side in 20
years. Why have you changed sides?

I haven't. It's just that this flat
is south facing so that side feels
different.

What was that?

It's Shepherd. He's
staying with me for a few days.

Why are we whispering?

Because it feels like we're doing
something wrong.

Are you OK, Larry?

He's in a relationship and getting
none. You're divorced and sleeping
with your ex-wife.

No wonder there's a recession.

It was a one-off. All right?

Could you not rekindle the magic
between the sheets?

It was a very pleasant trip down
memory lane for both of us.

Both of you?

Mullery. In a world of unlikely
couplings, you remain reliably
single.

What the fuck's that supposed to
mean?

I think it was supposed to be a
compliment.

Oh, it's funny, is it? What about
this? Is this funny?

To be fair to Mullery... that was
quite funny.

Now, awake surgery is not the most
pleasant experience for the patient,

so when she comes round, I want to
see comforting expressions. All
right?

That isn't you doing your comforting
expression, is it, Springer?

Ah, great.

My team looks more reassuring by the
minute.

He's having a cigarette outside at
his retirement party.

Starts getting terrible back pains.

Mullery picked him up at A & E,

felt the pulsation in his abdomen
and sorted out an urgent CT scan.

Good call, Mullery.

Could you go and talk to his wife?
And then go straight down.

I'm thinking of letting Mullery do
the abdominal end.

Do you think he'll be up to it?

I think Mullery would be up to
repairing the Bayeux Tapestry if he
put his mind to it.

It's his mind I'm worried about, not
his hands.

Mullery? He's always been very calm.

Not any more. He seems to be falling
out with everybody at the moment.

He even had a pop at Shepherd this
morning.

Can you tell me what that is,
Bridget? A watch.

Good.

And this?
A duck.

Yep.

And what's this?

Ahh...

It's OK. There's no need to worry.
Catch that? Yeah, I won't go near
there.

She's fitting.
Iced saline!

Explanation?

Jacksonian. Provoked by you working
on her motor strip.

More saline, come on! You can talk
and spray at the same time, can't
you?

We're gonna operate straightaway and
repair the damage.

Now Ron's in the best place.

Do you think it was the cake?

He said it was too rich but I said
I like cream.

It won't have been the cake. Far more
likely the sly fag he was having.

Sly fag? What sly fag?

He gave up ten years ago when he had
his stroke.

Oh. You might want to talk to him
about that.

Oh, Mrs Daggert. Mrs Daggert?

Let me show you where you can get a
cup of tea.

I think it was the cake.

Take the aortic cannula.

Good, now erm... hold the cannula
with the bevel pointing towards the
arch.

You hadn't anything planned today,
had you?

No more fights lined up?

We'll have to suture each branch
artery individually

and then re-implant the major
arteries supplying the bowel and
kidneys.

Should I cancel this afternoon's
elective? Cancel the milk and
papers.

We might be quite a while.

OK, Bridget?

I had a fit, didn't I?

You did. Yes.

That was...

That was...

Monroe?
I heard.

What are you trying to tell us,
Bridget?

That was the last one I'll ever have.

I hope so, Bridget. I certainly hope
so.

That's Mr Daggert's.

Is it true you hit Shepherd?

Well, he deserved it.

And the thing is... I really thought I
knew you

and then you do something like that
and I feel like I don't even know you
at all.

I was lonely and... and under
pressure.

No excuse. Oh...

I look back at it now and it makes
no sense.

And I'm sorry.

But I really need you to carry on
being my mate.

Do you think I'd have hit Shepherd if
I wasn't your mate?

You're a good man Mullery, with a
right hook to die for.

Call me slugger.

Did that slap of Mullery's bring you
to your senses?

I'd already come to my senses.

I'm going back to her. If she'll have
me.

Good. Good. Strip the bed before you
go.

If she asks about your black eye,
you got it playing Wii Just Dance.
It happens.

Oh, um...

that thing between me and Anna last
night, it was erm...

It didn't mean anything in the grand
scheme of things.

I'd assumed that it might mean you're
not gonna pursue Lizzie any more.

Why would it mean that?

Because you've cheated on Lizzie
between date one and date two.

Because you're a single man with a
whole world of single women to choose
from

and you end up sleeping with your
ex-wife.

Because your pursuit of Lizzie was
entirely driven by jealousy of Anna.

And, last but not least, because
Lizzie's no longer interested in you.

For a man with a train wreck of a
love life, you talk a very good
game.

What can I say?

You don't have to be a good player to
be a good manager.

Bridget.

Hello.

Do you know where you are?

Hospital.

Good.

Can you push against me?

Good.

Good.

Very good.

She's doing well. It'll take a few
days, but I'm pleased with her.

Has it worked, then? Is she cured?
Be a while before we know that.

We'll need to monitor her for the
next few months.

Right. Great. Thanks a lot.

That's me done, then. I'll
erm... shoot off if there's nothing
else.

Not quite the ending I was hoping
for.

You old romantic.

Lizzie?

This isn't about affairs of the
heart, is it?

Well, yes. I think we should just be
friends and colleagues.

I really like you but erm...
Great. That is the best news all day.

I'm sorry to let you down.
You're not. You're agreeing with me.

Good.

Good.

Not even a little bit sad?

No.

Who else have you told?
What?

Mullery punched me today. There can
be only one reason why.

You'd better come in.
No, I don't want to come in.

I want to know who else you told?

Springer? Bremner?

What are you trying to do to me?
Nothing. Nothing at all.

Then why?
Because I had to tell somebody.

Just like you did.
I haven't told a soul.

Apart from Monroe.
I haven't...

Don't deny it.

So you know why I had to tell
someone.

I won't be telling anybody else, so
don't worry on that score.

Why don't you just go home to your
family?

That's exactly what I'm gonna do.

Has he gone yet?

I'm afraid he sidled off earlier.
Thank goodness for that.

He hadn't been here five minutes and
I remembered why we'd split up.

Give me your hands. I want you to
push against me.

I'd like to pretend it was the
epilepsy that did it. You know, that
left me on my own.

I was just never very good at that
stuff.

No-one is. Not really. OK, squeeze.

You know, when I was a little girl,
my dad would take me to the pub,

sit me on a barstool with a bag of
crisps...

and I'd watch all the grown-ups
talking and laughing.

And I thought one day I'll be able
to do that, you know, just...

Talking about nothing as though it's
something? It's a knack.

And alcohol helps.

I'm still that little girl... sitting
on a barstool...

wondering when I get to join in.

I heard that was some operation you
pulled off today.

I didn't come here for small talk -
though I appreciate the effort.

Right.

I'm going to say something and...

you don't have to say anything other
than "Yes" or "No".

I know that you're Lawrence's best
friend

and I wouldn't be putting you through
this if I didn't think I was going
mad...

But I think, deep down, after what's
happened to you in the past,

I just think, deep down...

you know that it's better if the
truth comes out sooner rather than
later.

So...

This is what I think.

I think Lawrence is having, or has
had...

some sort of affair.

And I think you know about it.

I think you need to talk to Larry
about this.

Look me in the eye and tell me that
I'm wrong. Can you do that?

Can you deny it?

I am in agony here, Monroe.

I really... really wouldn't be doing
this if I wasn't.

Please.

I can't deny it.

And erm...

as insane as it sounds, I just need
to know.

I think he may have had an affair...

with Sarah Witney.

Thank you.

There's been an RTA on the M62.
OK. The cavalry is here.

He's arresting.
Chest compressions, come on!

There's a young lad hanging on to
his life by the skin of his teeth
because of you.

Monroe, he's bleeding out. You can't
pull rank. I'm the registrar.

You're throwing everything away.
What do you think I've been lying to
you about?

About sleeping with Witney.
You've screwed everything!

Everything apart from Witney. Who you
screwed in case it slipped your mind!