Mona the Vampire (1999–2008): Season 1, Episode 8 - The Vampire Hunter/The Sounds of Sirens - full transcript

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Here's a nice normal girl in an ordinary world

Show ur your fangs

YAY, MONA!

Life goes on like its weird soon its everything you fear

Show us your fangs

YAY, MONA!

Grab your cat

Grap your cape

Boogeyman, theres no escape

Give a heebie jeebie grin

Fight those nastys till you win



Till you win

aaaaahhhhhhhh

Check the mail

There's a ghoul

And a mummys loose at school

Show us your fangs

YAY, MONA!

Show us your fangs

YAY, MONA!

Show us your fangs

YAY, MONA!

Here's a nice normal girl in an extraordinary world

Mona the vampireeeeee

"THE VAMPIRE HUNTER"



Space baboons get them!

- We got them! Yay!
- We got them! Yay!

Hi, my name is Nicole

What are you guys doing?

Fighting space baboons,
why what did you think we were doing?

Look out, they're attacking!

Can I play too?

There's not enough room on the spaceship

Sorry

Look out, Lily!
They're coming again

Alright, you hear the school bell

Off to class

Class I like you to meet are new student Nicole Jablowski

She's new in town and I want you guys to make her feel welcome

- Hi, Nicole.
- Welcome to us!

Guess I was kind of rude to in the schoolyard

Time to make it up to her

Hi Nicole, welcome to

She's making friends with Angela?

Oh, forehead

Hey someone put this weird mirror in my locker

and they left you a note

- I can see right through you.
3 o'clock the playground.

and it signed the "Vampire Hunter"

Alright I think someone is playing a practical joke on me

So, I drew up a list of possible suspects

Angela?

But it couldn't have been Angela.
She's at cheerleading practice during recess

Well, whoever it was, I'm not gonna let them get to me

I'm just going to go ahead and eat my lunch as if nothing happened

Let's see now

one ketchup sandwich,

one can of Monster soda,

two dwarf finger celery sticks,

and a clove of garlic

A clove of garlic?!

Hey I didn't pack this

Look, there's a note attached

"Vampire stinks, see you at 3". Signed the Vampire Hunter

I'm more than a match for this amateur Vampire Hunter!

- This is the end of Mona the Vampire. See you soon!

The Vampire Hunter

Open your math books to page 63 please

This Vampire Hunter is way out of his League

Mirrors, garlic and a wooden stake doesn't work on me....

Except for the wooden stake that one works on anyone

Somebody's coming

Lawrence?!

Hi, guys!

OK, false alarm

But the Vampire Hunter should be here any second

Ahem

- Oh, hey!
- Hi, Nicole!

How's it going?

Well its past 3

Looks like the Vampire Hunter isn't showing up

I bet it was all the practical joke

Ahem

I am the Vampire Hunter

I know everything about you and your alter-ego

As of today,
Mona the vampire is history

Watch out!

Hahahaha hahaha

She is positively evil

There is no way that Vampire Hunter is running this vampire out of town

No way! I agree!

We're with you Mona!

- Are you ok?

- Oh yeah

This kind of stuff happens to me all the time

Here, let me help you

Gee, thanks

You know you shouldn't be mad at Mona for ignoring you in the school yard this morning

It's just another game and...

I'm not mad at her for that

Well, I was mad at first but not anymore

Then why are you have to her?

Because she's absolut be evil

- Well, see you later

- Bye

Thanks for helping me with my bike

Hand over that ice cream!

It's mine

Not anymore, it isn't

Get lost bully boy go pick on someone your own size!

Mind your own business, new girl

Let's get outta here!

Thanks!

My pleasure, I needed the practice anyway, just in case that vampire shows up

Nicole about that vampire thing. You know, maybe if you got to know Mona you like her

No way, Angela told me all about Mona the Vampire and her evil ways

See ya

Angela!

Mona, we gotta talk

It's about Nicole

Don't worry about me, I'm in training

Well we're worried about both of you

Yeah, we talked to Nicole and she is actually really nice

This is nothing but a big misunderstanding

You talk to her?

After what she said to me. And you think she's nice?!

I thought you were my friends

- We are
- It's just that she's...

Im not talk to you guys anymore

Go hang around with your new friend Nicole

And tell her that Mona the Vampire is coming for her!

Charlie the only way we're going to stop this showdown is to prove that Angela set them up

Looks like we're going to have to go undercover

Come on, Fang

What do you two want?

We just came by to congratulate you on your brilliant plan

Yeah, you really fooled Nicole good

She thinks Mona is an evil vampire thanks to you

What have you got there?

It's the metal detector

It detects hidden items like cameras, cell phones and

Aha, tape recorder!

Nice try

You really figured us out

There's no fooling you

Yeah, there's no way we could possibly trick you

Like you trick Nicole, to thinking Mona the evil vampire, right?

Wait, don't you want to hear how my brilliant plan worked?

Not really

I told Nicole that Mona was an evil vampire

And she believes every word I said

Besides being clever mastermind

I also happen to be a great actress

Quick! Mona and Nicole about to have to showdown in the park

It's the ultimate slime their duel

George, wait for me to finish painting my toenails and I'll be right with you

Lookouts coming through

I'm a personal friend of one of the combatants

And a personal enemy of the other

Mona the Vampire and I will duel

The loser will end up here in the same pool where their power will be sucked right out of them.... Forever!

Try some combustible garlic!

Right back at you with some tomato bomb!

How about the anti-vampire rocket

Some magnetic violence should bring you down to earth

Violence Ray is weighing me down

Too heavy

She's too heavy, somebody gives me a hand!

I'll help!

What's going on?

But how?

We had Nicole listen to your tape confession

But I confiscate your tape and your backup tape

But you didn't confiscate The Backup backup tape

Good work, Fang!

Let's take the Nicole out for some Monster sodas

I'd love to, but as long as there are evil vampires around I've still got work to do

- See ya

- Catch you later

Bye

Somebody give me a hand?

"THE SOUNDS OF SIRENS"

Nooo!

Sorry, when I know you won't be eating Greek tonight!

There we go, haha!

Come on

Up today's you

Next time

Shut the monster my your own size

God!

Mona!

Mona, can't you follow the script?

I met Charlie be eaten

I don't think so

Oh stop it, Mona!

Mona as Odysseus, the hero of our play, Charlie is supposed to defend himself

How much to heavy get them?

Hey, someone help me out here

Mona, we are trying to rehearse at stage version of Homer's the Odyssey

Do you know what the Odyssey was?

Yeah, what is the name of Captain Kirk ship in?

Do you know who Homer was?

Isn't that funny father in that cartoon show?

For your information, the Odyssey was a great work of Greek literature

And Homer was the old Greek guy who wrote it 1000 years ago

Now I am trying to direct a play here, so let's get one thing straight

You are not a vampire, OK?

You are Athena, goddess of wisdom

She's a goddess?

Angela, be quiet and look pretty

But I always look pretty

George, trying to get a little more feeling into your beastly roars

That's better

And Mona stay in your cloud

Next it

Odysseus our hero, encounters the evil sirens

Ready, Charlie?

- He's ready
- He's ready

OK, bring out the evil sirens

Sounds like the evil sirens, sir

What should we do?

Captain?

God

Can you believe it?

Just look at that

Now that class

I'd like to continue our study of Homer's the Odyssey

Today will be focusing on:

this sirens

Who would chaps sailors with their song?

Chaps sailors with their song?

Oh, hi!

Nooo!!!

Well, Mona

If you disagree so strongly, what was the name of Odysseus's wife?

Uh, Verda?

Sit down Mona

Can I turn the page?

Mona, it's getting late

Remember the rule

Vampire's bedtime is 10:00 o'clock

But dad, I'm studying

I have to research this ancient Greek story

Oh, the Odyssey

I'm reading up on sirens

I think one of them is trying to steal my best friend

Oh, that is a predicament

You know, I studied the Odyssey when I was a kid too

It was one of my favorite books

Aha

Well, good luck sweetie

Catch up the sail!

Close the hatch, men, and secure the...

Can I help you girl?

No, it's too mister Odyssey. I'm just here as an observer

Because I'm not even here

To tell you the truth, I kind kind of hard to concentrate with you staring at me

Well, if you insist

I want to know how you handle this singing sirens

Oh, that's easy

All you need is some wax, blindfold and some rope

Wow! Did Odysseus look anything like his picture in the book?

No, actually he was a lot shorter in real life

For some strange reason

He did look kind of familiar

The important thing is...

gave me a rope, blindfold and since he was all out of wack

and wax

Charley is in the clutches of the evil siren.

We gotta save it

Catch, you have to block it, the sirens musical drive him crazy

Oh no, you don't

Hey, leave me alone!
Leave me alone!

Hey, what's the big idea?

Let me go on timing

Looks pretty good

Oops, this is school bell

See you later, Charlie

Hey go back

Hey, I'm count to three

One, two, two and a half

Hey, how'd you ropes?

Some 6th grade girls help me

Thanks for what

But we were only trying to save you from the evil siren

So that's it

You're jealous of Lucy Lanning?

Jealous?

Uh, hardly

Can you could just be happy for me?

That siren spell is going to be difficult to break

I'm...

Hey, Lucy, wait up!

- Want to go grab an ice cream?

- Sure, Tom

Excuse me, you're stepping on my bag

Oh, sorry

I didn't

Come on, Tom

Next time, watch what you doing

Lily, our mission is clear

We have to keep Charlie away from that evil siren

Did you sneak the sausage
in the bouquet?

Yeah

Help!

Oh, sorry! Charlie, didn't see there

Just making sure the old locker good know me

So Odysseus ordered his sailors to tie him tightly to the mix

To keep growing, even if he asked to be set free

He gave them all pieces of wax to block their ears

So that they sailed safely by the island

And that's how Odysseus protected his sailors from the sirens be witching song

Way to go, Mona

Oh hey, number ready you can let go

Wonderful kids

The first half was fantastic

Now you the second half forms the great siren scene.

Are you ready?

I'm ready

He's up to something

If we can get him past the sirens, he'll be OK

Onward men to my rendezvous with destiny

Finally, my fair maiden!

Nice try, Captain,
but the siren is mine.

- Never, she's mine

- No, mine!

Here's to mine!

Here go on

I can sing. I can really sing

Ah, what can horror rocky?

We did it. Charley is cured

And they lived happily ever after

I knew we should've just done Romeo and Juliet