Modern Love Chennai (2023–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Lalagunda Bommaigal - full transcript
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Ma'am… the doctor wants to see you.
She has been shifted to the room.
Doctor?
It's done.
Where's that scoundrel?
Show this to him!
No, doctor.
Asshole!
The rascal is not answering his phone.
They think it's as easy
as ordering food online!
What the hell kind of love is this?
Attraction! Abortion!
Is this what you call love?
That rascal will escape.
You girls have to bear the brunt of it.
Doctor, when can I take her home?
Folks don't know, right?
I'm guessing you came here on the sly.
You can take her in the evening
once she gets glucose.
I don't know what's wrong.
Of late she seems like
she's been possessed.
DOLLS OF LALAGUNDA
Guruji!
Come in.
Guruji, your devotees have gathered.
But I am losing the game.
Okay, you go!
Guruji!
Bommai!
-Guruji.
-Come, Bommai.
Come in.
How are you?
How are the other Bommais at home?
Sit down.
Hail Lajja Bhairava.
All is well by the grace
of Varadha Muni Sappani Saami!
Superb!
Guruji, this is Shoba.
My neighbor.
What's up with this bommai?
Yesterday she doused herself
with kerosene,
and ran to the terrace
to set herself on fire.
I turned a water hose on her
and rolled her down the stairs.
She's been broken like this for a month.
That's why I brought her to see you.
Bommai?
Show me your foot.
Show!
Did you recently break up?
Lajja Bhairava!
I told you!
Guruji sees everything!
Yes, Guruji.
A bastard cheated her in love
and dumped her.
She's still agonizing over it.
Bommai…
if a door to love shut,
then it opens two others for you.
If the door to love shuts,
then two other open up.
Get it?
Hail Lajja Bhairava!
Pick one, bommai.
Pick!
Love is injure.
Love is medicine!
Get it?
The wounds inflicted by love
can only be healed by another love.
A man will come bearing
the balm for your pain.
He will come from the north.
He will arrive during the Diwali festival.
He will come
and burn away all your old memories.
He's the one you will marry.
But…
there's a chance that
he may be immoral or a thief!
Guruji!
Don't worry. It's a minor karma issue.
There's a remedy to fix that.
But it will cost you a bit.
Shall we do it?
-We can do that.
-I'll fucking kill him!
Shoba?
-I'll fuckin' beat you to death!
-Hey!
-Hey!
-Bommai has quite a temper!
I only utter the truth.
Hey! I refuse to get conned any more!
I'll show you all I can survive.
Survive with respect!
Fucking frauds!
-What are you doing?
-Hey!
Forgive us, Guruji!
Forgive us, Guruji!
-Lajja Bhairava!
-Bommai.
Bommai!
When woe strikes thee…
there will come a Northie!
Greetings, sir!
Hello, Nathuram!
Hey, Kavitha!
Nathuram is here.
-Wait a minute. I will get it for you.
-Okay.
So Nathuram, have you called home?
Who do I have back home?
All of you are my kin now.
I'm a pure Tamil-boy.
Big fan of Thalapathy!
Hey! You dubbed for a serial!
Stop spinning yarns!
Just wait and watch!
I'll marry a nice Tamil girl.
Then become a big businessman.
And then I'll become
Legend Nathuram Annachi!
Dream on!
Have you marked it as SP?
Yes, it's SP. Now go!
You always get the special,
don't you Nathuram?
Bro, can you wash that plate?
Nathuram, four plates
of vodka-shot pani puri.
What?
You know they just replace
the spiced water with vodka!
It's famous in Bombay.
Why? You don't have it?
Sister, watch your words!
Squeaky-clean business!
I won't even hand out a plate
if you've been drinking.
-Is that so?
-Hey!
Give us four plates of pani puri.
-Make it four.
-Okay.
Here you go.
Okay.
Here you go, sister.
I see.
Hey, Ramesh!
What's the matter?
-Hi, buddy!
-Oh, I see what the matter is.
-Hey, bro.
-Hey!
-Hey, Dinesh.
-Yeah, bro.
-I feel so dull, bro.
-Why?
Shall we go to sister's hospital
and get it checked?
Do you mean P.T. hospital?
Where's that, bro?
Hey!
-Google it and see! You will find it.
-Here you go.
You will find it easily.
-Hey, yeah! It's there!
-Yeah!
Come, let's go.
Look at her running away!
Hello!
Don't fight in front of my shop.
Get going!
What the--
How dare you talk to me this way?
I'll knife you and then destroy your shop!
Hey!
-Do we look like clowns to you?
-Talk to him!
-What do you think of yourself?
-Look at him…
Ramesh!
-Let's fuckin' beat the shit out of him!
-Hit him, bro!
-I will not spare you!
-Why is he staring at us?
-Go on. Try it!
-Shobha.
-Let it be.
-Fuckin' drama!
-Hey!
-Shobha!
-Calm down.
-Do you think you can act smart?
-I'll mutilate your face!
-What's wrong with her?
-Come here.
-What the hell!
-Why are you interfering?
-You interfered first!
Do you think I don't understand
what you are up to?
Get lost or I'll spill the beans!
-Fuckin' move!
-Hey!
-Hey!
-Hey!
Ramesh!
-I'll be back!
-What is it?
-Get out of the way!
-Get lost!
Hey, Ramesh.
What happened, dude?
-Come, let's go.
-Let's go.
By the way…
how many pani puris are in one plate?
Four.
Then, how come Shoba gets six
on her plate?
-Really?
-Hey, you snake!
That's what she noticed in all the chaos!
Not just now…
but Shoba's plate has had six
for a while now!
-Hey!
-Hey!
Where is she going?
Hey!
Why did you keep six puris for me?
It's because you are a good eater.
What are you doing?
Let's go!
Go!
-Vaiju.
-Yes?
Pour it the socialism way.
I always pour equally.
Suspicious dimwit!
-Here.
-Happy?
Happy.
What is your problem?
You yelled at Guruji as well!
You hit Nathuram in public!
Look here.
Look here.
I'm talking to you!
You're just fucking ignoring me.
Look here!
Look!
Two incisions.
Got it done at the hospital.
This?
I did it to myself…
for the asshole I ended up with.
Is there any woman
without a scar on her body…
or pain in her heart?
You're on fire, Vaiju!
Uncle…
I'll break your face to bits.
Shut it and sleep!
Stop acting smart now.
Thank you.
Hey!
When you are angry with one,
why take it out on another?
Nathuram is a good man.
I can tell from his eyes.
Do you remember the guy
who comes to buy biscuits?
That Swarna Bhavan owner?
His eyes are nasty.
Have you noticed how he looks at you?
He's pure sewage.
That asshole from the mobile shop…
There are a hundred like him.
But that Nathuram is a good guy.
I didn't have enough cash the day
I got you admitted at the hospital.
I asked him to Google Pay.
Did you know that?
Drama queen!
I speak from experience.
You can't live with men.
You can't live without them either.
What the--
I understand.
What you should do is,
place the pani puri there.
Place the pani puri there.
Okay, right?
That's perfect.
Is the focus right?
Yes, it is.
They're from a YouTube channel.
Please don't stir up any trouble now.
I didn't come to stir up trouble.
It was wrong of me
to hit you in a public place.
Okay.
Yesterday I forgot to collect
the money for the biscuits.
-Pay up.
-One second.
Hey, hurry up.
I don't have time.
I have to get to the trouser shop
I have a lot of commitments!
-One minute, sir. I'll be right there.
-Hurry!
Hurry! Come on!
-Coming, sir. Wait a minute.
-Oh, God!
That's okay. Even he is a married man!
My assistant has gone out.
Can you peel potatoes for me?
-Why?
-Please.
Sorry! I'll peel it myself.
-Hurry up. I don't have time.
-Ready, sir!
Madam, could you please help?
I have other locations to visit.
Please cooperate!
Are you ready?
Ready, sir!
Are you ready?
-Hey, Ashok, can you hear me?
-Yes, I can.
Ready, sir!
Move behind.
Do I look okay?
-Shall we start?
-Yeah, ready!
-Thanks.
-Get the camera ready.
Hi, guys. We're in Lalagunda
at Mr. Nathuram's Mumbay Chats.
If you ask for Nathuram's pani puri shop,
even a child can tell you the way!
The shop is that famous!
Do you want to know why?
It's the only shop in Chennai
serving color pani puri.
-How many colors?
-Three flavors, sir.
-As for the flavors, not one or two
-Three…
but he has three flavors in total!
Shall we try it?
About to eat it. Come closer.
Beautiful!
Amazing!
I'm sure he will open another branch
in Mylapore by next year!
Sir, it's at a whole other level!
Seriously!
Ponnkumaru!
There's nothing you aren't aware of.
Lalagunda area has
a special majesty to it.
Here there are Urdu-speaking,
Telugu-speaking, Tamil-speaking folks.
But is there any intermixing?
We have been careful all this
while to avoid this nonsense.
What is this shoddy behavior?
Hey, you! Show it to everybody.
Hey, show it!
The whole town has already seen it.
Are they promoting it now?
Hi, this is Mojo from
the Mojo Foodie Channel.
What we have for you today is
this cute couple from Lalagunda.
I mean, the husband and wife.
The two of them run
the famous Mumbay Chats together.
What do you have to say, Ponnkumaru?
-Big deal!
-Hey!
Quiet, Pa!
This is neither his fault nor mine.
I was just helping him out
by peeling potatoes.
Some idiot gets it wrong.
What do I do about that?
How can he possibly get it wrong?
Dad, do you doubt me?
Why do you go to such places?
So what?
I should just toil at the stove,
kneading dough all day?
Just because these jobless big shots
are talking this way,
Do you have to join them as well?
Hey, where are you?
Bloody! Come fast!
The man in question
is coming here himself.
He'll come and answer everybody.
Uncle, why are you allowing her to talk?
Who the fuck is he to come
and give us answers?
-Nonsense!
-Leave it to us.
-We'll take care of it!
-Hey! Shut up all of you!
What Guruji foretold is happening.
What can we mere mortals say?
Who is that?
Food reviewer.
Meaning?
You go to the hotel
and pay for the food you eat.
But he gets paid for eating the food.
-Got it?
-Oh, my God!
Everyone please forgive me!
-What is this?
-The fault is mine.
This girl was just standing in the corner,
peeling potatoes.
But that day I had gone
to Ms. Sundari's shop.
The Triplicane Kasi Vinayaka.
And, yes! Luz's Trouser Shop.
Since I covered all this,
I got totally confused.
I labeled them as husband and wife
without rechecking.
I plan to release an apology video.
That's what he's filming.
Please remember to subscribe
-to my Mojo Foodie Channel.
-Your last video is already in trouble
and you're releasing another?
-Bloody doughball! I'll fucking kill you!
-Bro! Bro!
-Get lost you jobless losers!
-Bro!
What is this kangaroo court?
Lalagunda has a special majesty to it.
Get lost!
Sir!
-Sis, I want mutton samosa.
-Quiet, Saranya.
We will give the biscuits and leave. Okay?
Okay, sister.
Here.
So, Nathuram, who's peeling the potatoes?
New wife?
What are you saying?
She's from my hometown.
She recently arrived.
She's working in a hotel.
She doesn't know Tamil
so I'm helping her out.
Hey, Sister.
What's the difference between you and
those who spoke at the council that day?
Oh, boy! Sorry!
Sister, you already know that
I'll marry a Tamil girl.
Yes, you've mentioned it.
I'll light a candle and pray for you.
Shall we go?
Hey, Shoba, come here.
Hey, you!
Ramesh bro is calling you.
Come to the lane.
-What for?
-Just for a chat. Come!
I have work.
How dare you!
Try and catch me. Come.
Hello! Move! Move!
Hey, Ramesh! I will be there.
Bro!
-It's because of you!
-Hey, you!
-Catch him!
-Get a hold of him!
-Hey!
-Wait!
-Ramesh! Hit him!
-Okay, bro.
What happened?
Sister, I'm going home.
What did you say that day?
That you'd be Legend Nathuram Annachi.
Now you're leaving town?
Aren't we here for you?
No, Sister.
They are not even real men.
You should've thrashed them.
I'll get going.
Okay, we'll talk later.
Let's go.
So…
why is your WhatsApp DP black?
Hey!
that's up to her.
Look…
I'll take you to Guruji.
Everything will be okay after that.
He has gone to the Himalayas.
Let him return, okay?
No, Sister.
What?
I will go home.
Is he not here?
I need biscuits.
Didn't you say you were going
to pack up and leave?
When the pani is here,
where will the puri go?
Like rice…
A feast of rice
She made mincemeat out of me and ate it
I'm left feeling like a dizzy mongoose
Waiting at the altar, in my wedding finery
She's a racing dove
I'm a single shark
She's a racing dove
I'm a single shark
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga
I'm single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
I'll take the famous
Bismi parotta and salna
And feed it to my girl
If some thug gets in the way
One thwack and he's dead
A large marble was just shot by Thomas
In the Lalagunda area our love is famous
Gilbert brought forth the golden thaali
In the paetai,
our love story is etched in stone
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga
I'm single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
I'm a single shark
Hey!
Ponnkumaru!
Hey, baker!
Hello, sir.
Kumaru, there's nothing
you aren't aware of.
Our area has Urdu-speaking,
Telugu-speaking, Tamil-speaking folks.
But is there any intermixing?
What on earth do you want?
Ponnkumaru, your daughter's antics
are crossing the limit.
You've struggled so much
to be where you are.
-We're telling you for your own good.
-Get lost!
If this is allowed to continue
it will get embarrassing for you.
We've said what we had to say.
Just keep an eye on your daughter.
Why don't you mind your own business?
It's a family matter
and we'll deal with it.
Girls these days take their own decisions.
Can we force them
to scratch all our itches?
Go and mind your own business!
Oh, is that so?
Okay, then.
If our area's righteous young men
take any action,
then we won't be responsible!
Let's go!
Okay, you handle it.
We've said what we came to say
The rest is up to you.
The mobile number
is currently switched off.
Please try later.
The mobile number--
Parveen!
Where's Nathuram?
I don't know. Phone's switched off.
-Hello, Sister.
-Where are you?
Come to P.T. Hospital immediately.
What's wrong?
Come fast!
-What happened?
-Don't panic.
Madam, the doctor is calling you.
Come, let's go.
Doctor?
Did that rascal turn on his phone?
No, doctor.
Asshole.
Poor girl.
She came here to earn a living.
These people won't listen to reason.
When can we take her home, doctor?
Okay.
Once she gets some glucose…
I'll take her in the evening.
Who did this?
That good guy.
Nathuram did this.
The number you're calling
is currently switched off.
He would give four pani puris to everyone.
But he would give me six pani puris.
He'd apparently keep four pani puris
for everyone else.
But six for her alone.
You were the one who used to help him out.
Both of you were like sisters to him.
Apparently we're the only ones
in this area who would help him.
We're like sisters to him.
It's obvious the moment
you lay eyes on him
that men like him come here
just to cheat you.
Shut up! Stop blabbering!
My family also hails from the same place.
This betrayed girl is also from there.
And the guy who knocked her up
is from this town.
It's nothing to do with
where they're from.
They're all men.
Here. Drink this and sit up straight.
Look here.
Listen to me.
We can't live with men.
We can't live without them either.
I think you should get married.
Shut it!
Did I say I won't marry?
All those dogs get married gleefully,
grin and live their lives.
So will I.
I'll show them how
I can live with respect.
I'm the one who asked
my parents to find me a groom.
You go make your Kumbakonam coffee.
-The groom looks like a total nerd.
-He looks good.
Hey! Keep it down!
Always chattering!
Shob-baby! Come.
Come.
He's got a vegetable shop
at Valasaravakkam.
We've done our research.
It's a good match.
Ponnkumaru…
Lalagunda has a special majesty,
and you've lived up to it!
Nowadays everything is a hybrid.
All fake!
All fruits are coated with wax
and have chemicals.
There's a proverb in English.
Don't judge the book by its cover.
Heard it?
What?
It feels like I have seen you somewhere.
I've heard your voice before.
Must have been in our previous birth.
No!
Bommai.
-Hey! You fraud!
-Shoba! Don't shout!
-Get up!
-Shoba, I got rid of that life
when I shaved off my beard!
Please Shoba!
I couldn't handle the power game.
I'm not some big shot corporate.
I'm a local.
I went to jail twice.
Nearly got murdered by my fellow inmate.
My heart is wounded, Shoba.
I just wanted to live an honest life
and get married.
And we were matched by chance!
The moment I saw you, I liked you!
I couldn't let go, Shoba.
Please, Shoba.
I've changed Shoba.
Just one last thing.
We can't live with women.
But we can't live without them either!
Woman.
Singular.
Get it?
That's only you henceforth, Shoba.
Shoba! Hit me!
Beat me to death!
Here! Hit me! Hit!
Here! Stab me with the knife!
Shoba! Please, Shoba.
I've changed, Shobha.
I'm not the same guy anymore.
Please, Shoba.
Shoba.
After all, humans make mistakes.
I never wanted to cheat you.
I liked you and got married to you.
Everyone seeks a good life.
I had the same wish.
Please, Shoba.
Please?
I'll take good care of you, Shoba.
I'm begging you.
Please, Shoba!
Can a man not reform?
Tell me, Shoba.
Shoba, please!
Will you take care of me well?
I will take good care of you.
-Will you be honest?
-I swear, I will!
Shoba, I'm a changed man.
Please, Shoba.
Please, Shoba.
Please?
Can't you see from my face?
I'm a changed man.
Please!
Cut some more!
Eat it!
Hey!
Hey, come!
Coming, baby!
Watch the shop.
Lock it and keep the keys.
Don't come ringing my doorbell at night.
Shall we go, baby?
Don't cook today.
Shall we go?
Go.
Baby, remember I told you
a man will come from the north
and you'd marry him?
It came true!
I'm from North Arcot
and I'm settled in North Madras.
How is it?
Not only that.
You said he'd be a crook.
That also came true.
Fraud!
Baby, the snacks here are amazing.
It's colorful.
Won't topple, right?
Bro, one plate pani puri.
Do you like the rain?
-Yes.
-Do you like me?
No.
Don't slouch.
Sir.
Hold this.
Eating pani puri is an art.
You take the pani puri,
pour the water
and in one second draw your chest in.
---
Ma'am… the doctor wants to see you.
She has been shifted to the room.
Doctor?
It's done.
Where's that scoundrel?
Show this to him!
No, doctor.
Asshole!
The rascal is not answering his phone.
They think it's as easy
as ordering food online!
What the hell kind of love is this?
Attraction! Abortion!
Is this what you call love?
That rascal will escape.
You girls have to bear the brunt of it.
Doctor, when can I take her home?
Folks don't know, right?
I'm guessing you came here on the sly.
You can take her in the evening
once she gets glucose.
I don't know what's wrong.
Of late she seems like
she's been possessed.
DOLLS OF LALAGUNDA
Guruji!
Come in.
Guruji, your devotees have gathered.
But I am losing the game.
Okay, you go!
Guruji!
Bommai!
-Guruji.
-Come, Bommai.
Come in.
How are you?
How are the other Bommais at home?
Sit down.
Hail Lajja Bhairava.
All is well by the grace
of Varadha Muni Sappani Saami!
Superb!
Guruji, this is Shoba.
My neighbor.
What's up with this bommai?
Yesterday she doused herself
with kerosene,
and ran to the terrace
to set herself on fire.
I turned a water hose on her
and rolled her down the stairs.
She's been broken like this for a month.
That's why I brought her to see you.
Bommai?
Show me your foot.
Show!
Did you recently break up?
Lajja Bhairava!
I told you!
Guruji sees everything!
Yes, Guruji.
A bastard cheated her in love
and dumped her.
She's still agonizing over it.
Bommai…
if a door to love shut,
then it opens two others for you.
If the door to love shuts,
then two other open up.
Get it?
Hail Lajja Bhairava!
Pick one, bommai.
Pick!
Love is injure.
Love is medicine!
Get it?
The wounds inflicted by love
can only be healed by another love.
A man will come bearing
the balm for your pain.
He will come from the north.
He will arrive during the Diwali festival.
He will come
and burn away all your old memories.
He's the one you will marry.
But…
there's a chance that
he may be immoral or a thief!
Guruji!
Don't worry. It's a minor karma issue.
There's a remedy to fix that.
But it will cost you a bit.
Shall we do it?
-We can do that.
-I'll fucking kill him!
Shoba?
-I'll fuckin' beat you to death!
-Hey!
-Hey!
-Bommai has quite a temper!
I only utter the truth.
Hey! I refuse to get conned any more!
I'll show you all I can survive.
Survive with respect!
Fucking frauds!
-What are you doing?
-Hey!
Forgive us, Guruji!
Forgive us, Guruji!
-Lajja Bhairava!
-Bommai.
Bommai!
When woe strikes thee…
there will come a Northie!
Greetings, sir!
Hello, Nathuram!
Hey, Kavitha!
Nathuram is here.
-Wait a minute. I will get it for you.
-Okay.
So Nathuram, have you called home?
Who do I have back home?
All of you are my kin now.
I'm a pure Tamil-boy.
Big fan of Thalapathy!
Hey! You dubbed for a serial!
Stop spinning yarns!
Just wait and watch!
I'll marry a nice Tamil girl.
Then become a big businessman.
And then I'll become
Legend Nathuram Annachi!
Dream on!
Have you marked it as SP?
Yes, it's SP. Now go!
You always get the special,
don't you Nathuram?
Bro, can you wash that plate?
Nathuram, four plates
of vodka-shot pani puri.
What?
You know they just replace
the spiced water with vodka!
It's famous in Bombay.
Why? You don't have it?
Sister, watch your words!
Squeaky-clean business!
I won't even hand out a plate
if you've been drinking.
-Is that so?
-Hey!
Give us four plates of pani puri.
-Make it four.
-Okay.
Here you go.
Okay.
Here you go, sister.
I see.
Hey, Ramesh!
What's the matter?
-Hi, buddy!
-Oh, I see what the matter is.
-Hey, bro.
-Hey!
-Hey, Dinesh.
-Yeah, bro.
-I feel so dull, bro.
-Why?
Shall we go to sister's hospital
and get it checked?
Do you mean P.T. hospital?
Where's that, bro?
Hey!
-Google it and see! You will find it.
-Here you go.
You will find it easily.
-Hey, yeah! It's there!
-Yeah!
Come, let's go.
Look at her running away!
Hello!
Don't fight in front of my shop.
Get going!
What the--
How dare you talk to me this way?
I'll knife you and then destroy your shop!
Hey!
-Do we look like clowns to you?
-Talk to him!
-What do you think of yourself?
-Look at him…
Ramesh!
-Let's fuckin' beat the shit out of him!
-Hit him, bro!
-I will not spare you!
-Why is he staring at us?
-Go on. Try it!
-Shobha.
-Let it be.
-Fuckin' drama!
-Hey!
-Shobha!
-Calm down.
-Do you think you can act smart?
-I'll mutilate your face!
-What's wrong with her?
-Come here.
-What the hell!
-Why are you interfering?
-You interfered first!
Do you think I don't understand
what you are up to?
Get lost or I'll spill the beans!
-Fuckin' move!
-Hey!
-Hey!
-Hey!
Ramesh!
-I'll be back!
-What is it?
-Get out of the way!
-Get lost!
Hey, Ramesh.
What happened, dude?
-Come, let's go.
-Let's go.
By the way…
how many pani puris are in one plate?
Four.
Then, how come Shoba gets six
on her plate?
-Really?
-Hey, you snake!
That's what she noticed in all the chaos!
Not just now…
but Shoba's plate has had six
for a while now!
-Hey!
-Hey!
Where is she going?
Hey!
Why did you keep six puris for me?
It's because you are a good eater.
What are you doing?
Let's go!
Go!
-Vaiju.
-Yes?
Pour it the socialism way.
I always pour equally.
Suspicious dimwit!
-Here.
-Happy?
Happy.
What is your problem?
You yelled at Guruji as well!
You hit Nathuram in public!
Look here.
Look here.
I'm talking to you!
You're just fucking ignoring me.
Look here!
Look!
Two incisions.
Got it done at the hospital.
This?
I did it to myself…
for the asshole I ended up with.
Is there any woman
without a scar on her body…
or pain in her heart?
You're on fire, Vaiju!
Uncle…
I'll break your face to bits.
Shut it and sleep!
Stop acting smart now.
Thank you.
Hey!
When you are angry with one,
why take it out on another?
Nathuram is a good man.
I can tell from his eyes.
Do you remember the guy
who comes to buy biscuits?
That Swarna Bhavan owner?
His eyes are nasty.
Have you noticed how he looks at you?
He's pure sewage.
That asshole from the mobile shop…
There are a hundred like him.
But that Nathuram is a good guy.
I didn't have enough cash the day
I got you admitted at the hospital.
I asked him to Google Pay.
Did you know that?
Drama queen!
I speak from experience.
You can't live with men.
You can't live without them either.
What the--
I understand.
What you should do is,
place the pani puri there.
Place the pani puri there.
Okay, right?
That's perfect.
Is the focus right?
Yes, it is.
They're from a YouTube channel.
Please don't stir up any trouble now.
I didn't come to stir up trouble.
It was wrong of me
to hit you in a public place.
Okay.
Yesterday I forgot to collect
the money for the biscuits.
-Pay up.
-One second.
Hey, hurry up.
I don't have time.
I have to get to the trouser shop
I have a lot of commitments!
-One minute, sir. I'll be right there.
-Hurry!
Hurry! Come on!
-Coming, sir. Wait a minute.
-Oh, God!
That's okay. Even he is a married man!
My assistant has gone out.
Can you peel potatoes for me?
-Why?
-Please.
Sorry! I'll peel it myself.
-Hurry up. I don't have time.
-Ready, sir!
Madam, could you please help?
I have other locations to visit.
Please cooperate!
Are you ready?
Ready, sir!
Are you ready?
-Hey, Ashok, can you hear me?
-Yes, I can.
Ready, sir!
Move behind.
Do I look okay?
-Shall we start?
-Yeah, ready!
-Thanks.
-Get the camera ready.
Hi, guys. We're in Lalagunda
at Mr. Nathuram's Mumbay Chats.
If you ask for Nathuram's pani puri shop,
even a child can tell you the way!
The shop is that famous!
Do you want to know why?
It's the only shop in Chennai
serving color pani puri.
-How many colors?
-Three flavors, sir.
-As for the flavors, not one or two
-Three…
but he has three flavors in total!
Shall we try it?
About to eat it. Come closer.
Beautiful!
Amazing!
I'm sure he will open another branch
in Mylapore by next year!
Sir, it's at a whole other level!
Seriously!
Ponnkumaru!
There's nothing you aren't aware of.
Lalagunda area has
a special majesty to it.
Here there are Urdu-speaking,
Telugu-speaking, Tamil-speaking folks.
But is there any intermixing?
We have been careful all this
while to avoid this nonsense.
What is this shoddy behavior?
Hey, you! Show it to everybody.
Hey, show it!
The whole town has already seen it.
Are they promoting it now?
Hi, this is Mojo from
the Mojo Foodie Channel.
What we have for you today is
this cute couple from Lalagunda.
I mean, the husband and wife.
The two of them run
the famous Mumbay Chats together.
What do you have to say, Ponnkumaru?
-Big deal!
-Hey!
Quiet, Pa!
This is neither his fault nor mine.
I was just helping him out
by peeling potatoes.
Some idiot gets it wrong.
What do I do about that?
How can he possibly get it wrong?
Dad, do you doubt me?
Why do you go to such places?
So what?
I should just toil at the stove,
kneading dough all day?
Just because these jobless big shots
are talking this way,
Do you have to join them as well?
Hey, where are you?
Bloody! Come fast!
The man in question
is coming here himself.
He'll come and answer everybody.
Uncle, why are you allowing her to talk?
Who the fuck is he to come
and give us answers?
-Nonsense!
-Leave it to us.
-We'll take care of it!
-Hey! Shut up all of you!
What Guruji foretold is happening.
What can we mere mortals say?
Who is that?
Food reviewer.
Meaning?
You go to the hotel
and pay for the food you eat.
But he gets paid for eating the food.
-Got it?
-Oh, my God!
Everyone please forgive me!
-What is this?
-The fault is mine.
This girl was just standing in the corner,
peeling potatoes.
But that day I had gone
to Ms. Sundari's shop.
The Triplicane Kasi Vinayaka.
And, yes! Luz's Trouser Shop.
Since I covered all this,
I got totally confused.
I labeled them as husband and wife
without rechecking.
I plan to release an apology video.
That's what he's filming.
Please remember to subscribe
-to my Mojo Foodie Channel.
-Your last video is already in trouble
and you're releasing another?
-Bloody doughball! I'll fucking kill you!
-Bro! Bro!
-Get lost you jobless losers!
-Bro!
What is this kangaroo court?
Lalagunda has a special majesty to it.
Get lost!
Sir!
-Sis, I want mutton samosa.
-Quiet, Saranya.
We will give the biscuits and leave. Okay?
Okay, sister.
Here.
So, Nathuram, who's peeling the potatoes?
New wife?
What are you saying?
She's from my hometown.
She recently arrived.
She's working in a hotel.
She doesn't know Tamil
so I'm helping her out.
Hey, Sister.
What's the difference between you and
those who spoke at the council that day?
Oh, boy! Sorry!
Sister, you already know that
I'll marry a Tamil girl.
Yes, you've mentioned it.
I'll light a candle and pray for you.
Shall we go?
Hey, Shoba, come here.
Hey, you!
Ramesh bro is calling you.
Come to the lane.
-What for?
-Just for a chat. Come!
I have work.
How dare you!
Try and catch me. Come.
Hello! Move! Move!
Hey, Ramesh! I will be there.
Bro!
-It's because of you!
-Hey, you!
-Catch him!
-Get a hold of him!
-Hey!
-Wait!
-Ramesh! Hit him!
-Okay, bro.
What happened?
Sister, I'm going home.
What did you say that day?
That you'd be Legend Nathuram Annachi.
Now you're leaving town?
Aren't we here for you?
No, Sister.
They are not even real men.
You should've thrashed them.
I'll get going.
Okay, we'll talk later.
Let's go.
So…
why is your WhatsApp DP black?
Hey!
that's up to her.
Look…
I'll take you to Guruji.
Everything will be okay after that.
He has gone to the Himalayas.
Let him return, okay?
No, Sister.
What?
I will go home.
Is he not here?
I need biscuits.
Didn't you say you were going
to pack up and leave?
When the pani is here,
where will the puri go?
Like rice…
A feast of rice
She made mincemeat out of me and ate it
I'm left feeling like a dizzy mongoose
Waiting at the altar, in my wedding finery
She's a racing dove
I'm a single shark
She's a racing dove
I'm a single shark
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga
I'm single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
I'll take the famous
Bismi parotta and salna
And feed it to my girl
If some thug gets in the way
One thwack and he's dead
A large marble was just shot by Thomas
In the Lalagunda area our love is famous
Gilbert brought forth the golden thaali
In the paetai,
our love story is etched in stone
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga
I'm single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
Jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
She's a racing dove
Jingarthathanga jingarthathanga
I'm a single shark
I'm a single shark
Hey!
Ponnkumaru!
Hey, baker!
Hello, sir.
Kumaru, there's nothing
you aren't aware of.
Our area has Urdu-speaking,
Telugu-speaking, Tamil-speaking folks.
But is there any intermixing?
What on earth do you want?
Ponnkumaru, your daughter's antics
are crossing the limit.
You've struggled so much
to be where you are.
-We're telling you for your own good.
-Get lost!
If this is allowed to continue
it will get embarrassing for you.
We've said what we had to say.
Just keep an eye on your daughter.
Why don't you mind your own business?
It's a family matter
and we'll deal with it.
Girls these days take their own decisions.
Can we force them
to scratch all our itches?
Go and mind your own business!
Oh, is that so?
Okay, then.
If our area's righteous young men
take any action,
then we won't be responsible!
Let's go!
Okay, you handle it.
We've said what we came to say
The rest is up to you.
The mobile number
is currently switched off.
Please try later.
The mobile number--
Parveen!
Where's Nathuram?
I don't know. Phone's switched off.
-Hello, Sister.
-Where are you?
Come to P.T. Hospital immediately.
What's wrong?
Come fast!
-What happened?
-Don't panic.
Madam, the doctor is calling you.
Come, let's go.
Doctor?
Did that rascal turn on his phone?
No, doctor.
Asshole.
Poor girl.
She came here to earn a living.
These people won't listen to reason.
When can we take her home, doctor?
Okay.
Once she gets some glucose…
I'll take her in the evening.
Who did this?
That good guy.
Nathuram did this.
The number you're calling
is currently switched off.
He would give four pani puris to everyone.
But he would give me six pani puris.
He'd apparently keep four pani puris
for everyone else.
But six for her alone.
You were the one who used to help him out.
Both of you were like sisters to him.
Apparently we're the only ones
in this area who would help him.
We're like sisters to him.
It's obvious the moment
you lay eyes on him
that men like him come here
just to cheat you.
Shut up! Stop blabbering!
My family also hails from the same place.
This betrayed girl is also from there.
And the guy who knocked her up
is from this town.
It's nothing to do with
where they're from.
They're all men.
Here. Drink this and sit up straight.
Look here.
Listen to me.
We can't live with men.
We can't live without them either.
I think you should get married.
Shut it!
Did I say I won't marry?
All those dogs get married gleefully,
grin and live their lives.
So will I.
I'll show them how
I can live with respect.
I'm the one who asked
my parents to find me a groom.
You go make your Kumbakonam coffee.
-The groom looks like a total nerd.
-He looks good.
Hey! Keep it down!
Always chattering!
Shob-baby! Come.
Come.
He's got a vegetable shop
at Valasaravakkam.
We've done our research.
It's a good match.
Ponnkumaru…
Lalagunda has a special majesty,
and you've lived up to it!
Nowadays everything is a hybrid.
All fake!
All fruits are coated with wax
and have chemicals.
There's a proverb in English.
Don't judge the book by its cover.
Heard it?
What?
It feels like I have seen you somewhere.
I've heard your voice before.
Must have been in our previous birth.
No!
Bommai.
-Hey! You fraud!
-Shoba! Don't shout!
-Get up!
-Shoba, I got rid of that life
when I shaved off my beard!
Please Shoba!
I couldn't handle the power game.
I'm not some big shot corporate.
I'm a local.
I went to jail twice.
Nearly got murdered by my fellow inmate.
My heart is wounded, Shoba.
I just wanted to live an honest life
and get married.
And we were matched by chance!
The moment I saw you, I liked you!
I couldn't let go, Shoba.
Please, Shoba.
I've changed Shoba.
Just one last thing.
We can't live with women.
But we can't live without them either!
Woman.
Singular.
Get it?
That's only you henceforth, Shoba.
Shoba! Hit me!
Beat me to death!
Here! Hit me! Hit!
Here! Stab me with the knife!
Shoba! Please, Shoba.
I've changed, Shobha.
I'm not the same guy anymore.
Please, Shoba.
Shoba.
After all, humans make mistakes.
I never wanted to cheat you.
I liked you and got married to you.
Everyone seeks a good life.
I had the same wish.
Please, Shoba.
Please?
I'll take good care of you, Shoba.
I'm begging you.
Please, Shoba!
Can a man not reform?
Tell me, Shoba.
Shoba, please!
Will you take care of me well?
I will take good care of you.
-Will you be honest?
-I swear, I will!
Shoba, I'm a changed man.
Please, Shoba.
Please, Shoba.
Please?
Can't you see from my face?
I'm a changed man.
Please!
Cut some more!
Eat it!
Hey!
Hey, come!
Coming, baby!
Watch the shop.
Lock it and keep the keys.
Don't come ringing my doorbell at night.
Shall we go, baby?
Don't cook today.
Shall we go?
Go.
Baby, remember I told you
a man will come from the north
and you'd marry him?
It came true!
I'm from North Arcot
and I'm settled in North Madras.
How is it?
Not only that.
You said he'd be a crook.
That also came true.
Fraud!
Baby, the snacks here are amazing.
It's colorful.
Won't topple, right?
Bro, one plate pani puri.
Do you like the rain?
-Yes.
-Do you like me?
No.
Don't slouch.
Sir.
Hold this.
Eating pani puri is an art.
You take the pani puri,
pour the water
and in one second draw your chest in.