Mixed-ish (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 8 - Weird Science - full transcript
Hiding part of who you are
is a time-honored tradition.
It's called code switching.
Girl, you know my mama
didn't raise no fool, now.
Come on, y...
No, we are not fools over here.
Absolutely not!
We will represent you to the fullest!
Code switching is when you
change the way you act or speak
to fit in with the people around you.
Black people do it around white people.
Lord. So...
Parents do it
when they want to sound cool
around their kids.
Dude, what's your damage?
Clean up you room.
It's, like, so... grody.
And girls did it with boys all the time.
But I didn't know that yet.
Science tests are graded and... yikes.
I hope you know how to... oof...
cook a mean dinner
or throw a football.
I plan to marry rich.
Oh, except Rainbow here.
She even noticed a mistake that I made
and earned extra credit.
Keep it up.
The older you get, the more
people will love that.
I got a 105. What'd you get?
Oh.
I failed it on purpose. See?
Why'd you fail it on purpose?
I'm not sure how it worked
on the commune,
but here, girls don't do science.
I don't even like teaching it.
How'd you guys do?
Good, I think.
Mine says I'm wife material.
And mine says,
"Good thing you're pretty."
Now it seems insane, but back then,
girls would purposely take
a back seat to boys in classes
so they wouldn't get made fun of.
Especially in math and science.
- Hey, guys.
- No, no, no, no, no...
I don't know what's wrong with everyone,
but I got a 105.
On a science test?
You're like a super nerd.
My mom says girls like you
grow up to die alone.
Even though I'm proud of being
a super-successful doctor now,
12-year-old me had to learn
how to code switch.
Ooh, I meant to erase that.
Okay. Who wants to skip math today?
♪ In the mix ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, they keep trying ♪
♪ But they can't stop us ♪
♪ 'Cause we got a love ♪
♪ That keeps rising up ♪
♪ In the mix ♪
♪ Life turns around ♪
♪ 'Round and 'round it goes ♪
♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up world ♪
♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up ♪
♪ And that's for sure ♪
♪ Mixed-up ♪
♪ In the mix ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ We're gonna get by ♪
♪ We're gonna ♪
♪ On our own, side by side ♪
♪ Love's all we need to be free ♪
♪ Lo-o-o-ve is all ♪
♪ I got you, you got me ♪
♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪
♪ I-I-In the mix ♪
♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪
♪ I-I-In the mix-ish ♪
Before the Internet,
career fairs were the only way
to learn about jobs
we'd grow up to hate.
Hey, want to check this out tomorrow?
Didn't you learn anything
in class today?
Nobody likes science girls.
But I really like science.
And I really like burning ants
with a magnifying glass,
but at least I know to keep it private.
Look, you just went
to the dance with Bryce.
Don't ruin it by being weird.
That's where we need to go tomorrow.
Who's Wendy Whiteman?
You don't know Wendy Whiteman?
She's a news anchor
with a weather girl's body.
In 1985, there was no YouTube
or reality TV...
...so if you were
a local news personality,
you might as well have been Madonna.
News anchor, are you crazy?
I could never do that.
Of course you can't.
But you can try to be more like her...
beautiful, busty,
has definitely kissed a boy.
But I want to be me.
I don't think you do.
Whoa!
What's all this?
These are spices.
No, these are unnecessary.
So you don't want no Lawry's?
What about Season All?
Nice try, but nothing can "season all."
- Daddy...
- Your food is bland, Paul.
Your black kids deserve better.
By the way, my Aunt Dee-Dee
does not code switch.
The kids need to learn their way
around spices, all right?
The worst day in a black person's life
is when you and someone else
bring the same dish to a potluck,
and at the end of the night,
theirs is all gone,
and yours is just sitting there all sad.
Spices are what
amateur cooks use to mask
- the mistakes they've made in the kitchen.
- Dad!
So, Denise, what are you hiding?
Come on, Johan.
I'mma teach you about TV dinners.
You gonna need 'em.
Wait, they sell TVs you can eat?!
No, baby.
- Daddy, Daddy!
- Hey.
Look what I can do!
Uh-huh! It's Santi!
- Uh-huh.
- Okay, Santi. Okay.
- Uh-huh!
- Come on.
Hey.
- My wrist.
- Oh.
- Oh, no. No, no, no, no.
- My wrist.
What happened?
- This wouldn't have happened...
- Oh.
...if you would've had
spices in your kitchen
- like a grown man.
- No, spices hurt people.
- Ohh.
- There you go, big guy.
Come here.
Oh! Oh, my pumpkin.
You okay?
Since I was rudely interrupted...
This was the first time
- my sister wasn't the center of attention.
- Uh-huh!
I'm cute! Don't deny it!
- Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.
- She was even born a month early
because Johan had just learned
to ride a bike
and she wanted to steal his thunder.
- Go Santi.
- Okay, not now, Santi.
If my wrist doesn't heal,
can I get a hook?
Johan, why don't you go lie down, baby?
Yeah, make sure
your brother's comfortable.
- Get him anything he needs.
- Mm-hmm.
Who's gonna get me what I need?
Good news, hippies.
I just got off the phone
with the grocery store.
They're gonna pay
Johan's medical expenses?
- And for my Jamaican vacation?
- Nope.
They're a national grocery chain,
and we get to sue
the [bleep] out of them.
Wait, they're not gonna pay anything?
Not a dime. They're famous
for doing this sort of thing.
They said you're lying, that you
poured water on the floor.
They said you're scammers.
We poured water on the floor?!
That's genius, but we didn't do it.
It's like Denise said, the floor
was already wet, Johan slipped.
- It's the store's fault.
- It's not bad enough
these greedy corporations
have a monopoly on food?
Now they want to pull one over
on the little guy?
Well, wait until they see
how big this guy can get.
Yeah, get 'em, sis!
We about to get paid!
No, we're gonna make sure
these greedy fat cats
are held accountable.
By getting paid!
Ooh, I'mma look so good
in my Louis Vuitton.
So, what'd you decide to sign up for?
Answer wisely, Rainbow.
Um...
I know my mom has always said
that I shouldn't let anyone
dim my light.
But when Bryce was around,
my light was looking really nerdy.
Hey, dork, your books fell.
Loser.
Look!
There she is!
She's really here!
Wendy Whiteman.
♪ Remember my name ♪
♪ Fame ♪
♪ I'm gonna live forever ♪
♪ I'm gonna learn how to fly ♪
♪ High ♪
♪ I feel it comin' together ♪
♪ People will see me and cry ♪
♪ Fame ♪
♪ I'm gonna make it to heaven ♪
♪ Light up the sky like a flame ♪
Shut up!
Wendy Whiteman is speaking.
Journalism.
Journalism connects us
to what's happening on our
block, and around the globe.
The news is our bulwark against tyranny.
It is the blood that flows
through the veins of democracy.
I've never thought
of the news like that.
I guess it's really important.
For career week, one lucky student and I
will research, write, and report
a news story
about your state champion
girls' volleyball team.
So, who is going to be
the lucky student?
Me!
Raise your hand, girl!
When else are you gonna be able
to do nerdy stuff that's still cool?
Me!
But journalism takes grit.
So, put your hand down
if you can't handle getting yelled at.
Or being judged
on your physical appearance.
Or being in a war zone
with bullets flying by.
Oh. Please pick me, Miss Whiteman!
All three of those things
happened to me in one day
when our commune was raided.
Huh. I like a lady with a story.
You're in.
♪ Baby, look at me ♪
♪ And tell me what you see ♪
This just in,
my life is awesome.
- Yeah, it is.
- ♪ Remember my name ♪
♪ Fame ♪
So, I made the conscious decision
to accompany my sister's dusty
white husband to the store
to pick up said spices.
Normally, I would go to
the store on the west side,
but my "friend" Hakeem...
Bald Hakeem, not
Little Hakeem... works there,
and I didn't want him to think
I was with a white man.
So, I went to the freezer section
to try the new Hungry Man meals
my girlfriend Lorraine
had told me about.
By the way, Lorraine works
at that grocery store.
And she drive a Volvo.
Something ain't adding up.
Let me stop you right there,
if that's even possible.
But I haven't gotten to the
particulars of the incident yet.
For this arbitration,
you just need to focus
on the relevant facts.
It's a relevant fact that
Lorraine is up to no good.
Listen, when we do this for real,
you don't have to do the snap...
up, down, or diagonal.
And, uh, I'll introduce you as Denise.
You don't have to wear
two earrings that say that.
Oh, and maybe you should shave
your mustache
so people don't think
you a dirty-movie star.
Paul, are you sure
you didn't see anything?
Not even out of the corner of your eye?
Please?
I told you, Santi was dancing.
Would you be comfortable
lying under oath?
Of course not.
What's wrong with her testimony?
Well, for one thing, the
arbitrator doesn't need to hear
everything that happened
on "Falcon Crest."
She doesn't watch "Falcon Crest."
She's a "Dynasty" girl.
Don't you have, like,
a "job interview" voice?
Now my accent's not good enough?
None of these things should
matter if I'm telling the truth.
This is how these things work, Dee.
I-It's not like he's saying
you should become a different person.
No, I'm absolutely saying
she needs to become a different person.
Perhaps someone who doesn't know
anyone named "Bald Akeem."
It's Hakeem.
So... what do you think
of my story research?
I would've gotten it done sooner,
but, you know, I'm 12.
You're what Barbara Walters
calls a "natural story hound."
You're gonna be a hit when this airs.
I'm sorry.
- "Airs"?
- Yep.
Like on TV?
I know it sounds scary,
but it's fine.
You just have to show people
who you are.
So...
who the heck are you, Rainbow Johnson?
Well, I grew up on the commune, and...
Over the next half hour,
Wendy and I got deep.
Did you live, like, in tents?
Or did you have houses?
She told me how she was also
the oldest of three,
how she also felt like
an outsider at my age.
She even told me what went down
at the station's Christmas party,
which was so not appropriate.
Anyway, no one ever opened up
to me like that before.
It really made me feel special.
I get it.
Being different is hard.
As the only woman in the news room,
I'm either too brassy or too meek.
But I eventually figured it out,
and I'm sure you will, too.
Rainbow?
You missed class.
- Miss Whiteman, hi.
- Hi.
I need you to sign
this form excusing her.
Sure.
Can you make it out to my niece?
Her name is Miss Collins.
He can't just talk to me
any old kind of way.
He doesn't think I can give
a simple deposition
to demonstrate negligence
on the part of a business owner?
Was that from "Night Court?"
So?!
Look, I'mma tell the truth
the way I want to,
and if they don't believe me,
screw them.
Okay, I know it feels icky
to tone yourself down for these folks,
but if we're going to hold
those people accountable,
then you'll have to play ball.
Hold on, Alicia.
You're saying that who I am as a person
is the only thing getting in the way
of us getting what we want?
I'm saying I'm in court rooms every day.
I use any little thing
about a witness to discredit them.
I don't want to see
that happen to my sister.
I thought black folks like you
practicing law
was gonna change how they see us.
Look, I'll do my best,
but if you're saying them believing me
depends on me talking a certain way,
then you part of the problem.
Mind your business!
Uh-huh! It's me!
Go Santi! Uh-huh!
- Johan, can I sign your cast?
- Go me! Go me!
Go me! Look at me!
What?!
Leave some room for me to sign!
Hey, Santi, you want to come
sign my cast?
So you can sell it when I become famous?
Uh... that's a no.
As an adult, when my sister
wants attention,
she just fakes a pregnancy.
But before that was an option,
she had to be more creative.
It's on the left. You got that?
The desire to be the center of attention
definitely did not run in the family.
I was starting to wonder
if I was ready to make the news.
In three, two...
I-I-I'm here
with the Mondale School's
Lady Roadrunner Volleyball Team.
Ladies of ball court...
Volley great...
State great...
State champ great...
Uh, Roadrunners...
Okay, cut.
Come here, come here.
Don't worry so much.
The first time I was on camera,
I tripped Eartha Kitt
with my microphone cord.
So you'll be fine.
Just remember, breathe...
...and smile. Yeah!
Breathe and smile.
Good, you're doing great. Go, go, go.
Smile.
Let's talk to the team general.
Team captain.
Let's talk to the team captain.
Face the camera.
- Team...
- The microphone is shaking.
Talk.
Okay, cut.
Okay... um...
A lot of people have
a natural talent for this.
You do not.
Well, I am more interested in...
Pursue that, whatever that is.
It's science.
Honestly, I bet
you'd be really good at that.
Well, I'm already a commune weirdo.
I can't stack "science nerd" on top.
If you love science, go for it.
Sorry, Miss Whiteman,
but you'll never understand.
You're perfect and beautiful.
You get to be yourself every day,
and everyone adores you.
I'm just a weird mixed girl.
Hey, hey, hang on, hang on.
Um...
I'm sorry I didn't tell you
this earlier, but...
I'm also a weird mixed girl.
Well, I'm not weird, but...
...I am mixed.
My dad is black.
I thought you were white.
Everybody does. I mean...
Look, back in the '60s,
my mentor told me
it was best to keep it a secret
because he was afraid
it would ruin my career.
But luckily, things are different now.
So say it loud.
You're a mixed science nerd
and you're proud.
If things are so different now,
then why don't you tell the truth?
Well, it's just that people
already think one thing about me,
and I'm not sure it's a good
idea to switch things up.
- But it was all built on a lie.
- Well...
How can you tell me
to be proud of who I am
when you're scared of what we are?
Rainbow...
If a famous news anchor can't be proud,
what hope do I have?
You never forget the first time
someone you respect disappoints you.
And the last thing you want
in that moment is a party.
If you get rich and famous from this,
can you buy me a hand hook?
I just think my body
needs a little more metal.
I talked to Denise.
She's going to tone it way down.
So, somewhere between
Jimmy Walker and Mr. T?
You owe her an apology.
You insulted her.
I gave her legal advice.
I guess she told you I'mma play ball.
Thank you.
And evidently, I owe you an apology.
- But trust me...
- Okay, stop talking.
Unh-unh, unh-unh.
...exactly who you are
just isn't perfect
for every situation...
or any situation
outside of "The Phil Donahue Show."
Anyway, glad you came to your senses.
That's when Mom realized
that she had always told me
never to dim my light,
but she was snuffing out her sister's.
Okay, that's it.
We're not doing this.
Denise is gonna tell what happened
in her own words and in her own voice.
I am?
If the court can't accept her
for who she is,
then the court should change,
not my sister.
Right, because us old white guys
love to change.
Santi, come on.
Let's watch your sister on TV.
The news is about to start. Let's go.
Oh. So, you noticed I was gone.
Look, that's enough.
I know you're upset
because your brother and sister
have been getting the attention,
but guess what?
The world does not revolve
around you, young lady.
I don't get it.
We are a family.
We support each other.
Sometimes you are in the spotlight,
and sometimes you are
in the stands, cheering.
This just happens to be
one of those times
where it's your turn to cheer.
I was born for the spotlight.
Well, then it's good you're
out of it every now and then,
because then you'll appreciate
it more when it comes back.
Now, you can come and watch
with us if you want,
but only if you're big enough
not to take away
from someone else's moment.
Hey.
Can I sign your cast now?
Of course.
I saved you the best spot.
Just keep it PG, okay?
Fine.
- Shh! Here it is.
- Here we go.
And now, congratulations
to the Mondale School's
Lady Roadrunners,
who ran away with the state
championship in volleyball.
To tell you all about it
is Mondale student Rainbow Johnson.
I'm Rainbow Johnson.
She sure is.
All of us here at Eyewitness Nine News
want to recognize Rainbow for
her intensive research,
strong writing, and the ability
to say her name.
And on a personal note...
I got into journalism
to report the truth.
But this charming, dynamic young lady
made me realize how harmful it
can be not to live the truth.
I'm half black.
I kept that a secret because somehow,
I thought it would be for the best.
But hiding who you are
doesn't do the world any favors.
So, that's my story.
Thank you, Rainbow.
So, even though code switching
might sometimes feel necessary,
if we do it too much,
we lose who we are.
He slipped on the water
from that leaky freezer.
Now, I had come from the other aisle
from getting my rash cream...
make sure you don't put that down.
♪ The time has come for me ♪
- And I liked who I was.
- ♪ To break out of this shell ♪
So now nothing was more important to me
than following my passion.
- Hey, Rainbow.
- Not even Bryce.
And thank goodness, because as you know,
I grew up to be a badass doctor.
- I save lives.
- Hey.
Not sure if I've ever
mentioned that before.
♪ I'm coming out ♪
I still can't believe Wendy Whiteman
talked about our daughter on the news.
And she was honest about being mixed.
- Mm.
- Good for her.
We really gonna pretend
like we didn't already know?
Really?
Remember when she did that story
and she knew a little too much
about cocoa butter?
- Hmm.
- So, what I want to know is
how many other secret
black people are out there,
and how does one spot them?
You can't.
They everywhere.
Shoot, Richard Dawson,
Jacques Cousteau,
Princess Diana,
the daddy from "The Jetsons"...
all black.
Allegedly.
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
is a time-honored tradition.
It's called code switching.
Girl, you know my mama
didn't raise no fool, now.
Come on, y...
No, we are not fools over here.
Absolutely not!
We will represent you to the fullest!
Code switching is when you
change the way you act or speak
to fit in with the people around you.
Black people do it around white people.
Lord. So...
Parents do it
when they want to sound cool
around their kids.
Dude, what's your damage?
Clean up you room.
It's, like, so... grody.
And girls did it with boys all the time.
But I didn't know that yet.
Science tests are graded and... yikes.
I hope you know how to... oof...
cook a mean dinner
or throw a football.
I plan to marry rich.
Oh, except Rainbow here.
She even noticed a mistake that I made
and earned extra credit.
Keep it up.
The older you get, the more
people will love that.
I got a 105. What'd you get?
Oh.
I failed it on purpose. See?
Why'd you fail it on purpose?
I'm not sure how it worked
on the commune,
but here, girls don't do science.
I don't even like teaching it.
How'd you guys do?
Good, I think.
Mine says I'm wife material.
And mine says,
"Good thing you're pretty."
Now it seems insane, but back then,
girls would purposely take
a back seat to boys in classes
so they wouldn't get made fun of.
Especially in math and science.
- Hey, guys.
- No, no, no, no, no...
I don't know what's wrong with everyone,
but I got a 105.
On a science test?
You're like a super nerd.
My mom says girls like you
grow up to die alone.
Even though I'm proud of being
a super-successful doctor now,
12-year-old me had to learn
how to code switch.
Ooh, I meant to erase that.
Okay. Who wants to skip math today?
♪ In the mix ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, they keep trying ♪
♪ But they can't stop us ♪
♪ 'Cause we got a love ♪
♪ That keeps rising up ♪
♪ In the mix ♪
♪ Life turns around ♪
♪ 'Round and 'round it goes ♪
♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up world ♪
♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up ♪
♪ And that's for sure ♪
♪ Mixed-up ♪
♪ In the mix ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ We're gonna get by ♪
♪ We're gonna ♪
♪ On our own, side by side ♪
♪ Love's all we need to be free ♪
♪ Lo-o-o-ve is all ♪
♪ I got you, you got me ♪
♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪
♪ I-I-In the mix ♪
♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪
♪ I-I-In the mix-ish ♪
Before the Internet,
career fairs were the only way
to learn about jobs
we'd grow up to hate.
Hey, want to check this out tomorrow?
Didn't you learn anything
in class today?
Nobody likes science girls.
But I really like science.
And I really like burning ants
with a magnifying glass,
but at least I know to keep it private.
Look, you just went
to the dance with Bryce.
Don't ruin it by being weird.
That's where we need to go tomorrow.
Who's Wendy Whiteman?
You don't know Wendy Whiteman?
She's a news anchor
with a weather girl's body.
In 1985, there was no YouTube
or reality TV...
...so if you were
a local news personality,
you might as well have been Madonna.
News anchor, are you crazy?
I could never do that.
Of course you can't.
But you can try to be more like her...
beautiful, busty,
has definitely kissed a boy.
But I want to be me.
I don't think you do.
Whoa!
What's all this?
These are spices.
No, these are unnecessary.
So you don't want no Lawry's?
What about Season All?
Nice try, but nothing can "season all."
- Daddy...
- Your food is bland, Paul.
Your black kids deserve better.
By the way, my Aunt Dee-Dee
does not code switch.
The kids need to learn their way
around spices, all right?
The worst day in a black person's life
is when you and someone else
bring the same dish to a potluck,
and at the end of the night,
theirs is all gone,
and yours is just sitting there all sad.
Spices are what
amateur cooks use to mask
- the mistakes they've made in the kitchen.
- Dad!
So, Denise, what are you hiding?
Come on, Johan.
I'mma teach you about TV dinners.
You gonna need 'em.
Wait, they sell TVs you can eat?!
No, baby.
- Daddy, Daddy!
- Hey.
Look what I can do!
Uh-huh! It's Santi!
- Uh-huh.
- Okay, Santi. Okay.
- Uh-huh!
- Come on.
Hey.
- My wrist.
- Oh.
- Oh, no. No, no, no, no.
- My wrist.
What happened?
- This wouldn't have happened...
- Oh.
...if you would've had
spices in your kitchen
- like a grown man.
- No, spices hurt people.
- Ohh.
- There you go, big guy.
Come here.
Oh! Oh, my pumpkin.
You okay?
Since I was rudely interrupted...
This was the first time
- my sister wasn't the center of attention.
- Uh-huh!
I'm cute! Don't deny it!
- Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.
- She was even born a month early
because Johan had just learned
to ride a bike
and she wanted to steal his thunder.
- Go Santi.
- Okay, not now, Santi.
If my wrist doesn't heal,
can I get a hook?
Johan, why don't you go lie down, baby?
Yeah, make sure
your brother's comfortable.
- Get him anything he needs.
- Mm-hmm.
Who's gonna get me what I need?
Good news, hippies.
I just got off the phone
with the grocery store.
They're gonna pay
Johan's medical expenses?
- And for my Jamaican vacation?
- Nope.
They're a national grocery chain,
and we get to sue
the [bleep] out of them.
Wait, they're not gonna pay anything?
Not a dime. They're famous
for doing this sort of thing.
They said you're lying, that you
poured water on the floor.
They said you're scammers.
We poured water on the floor?!
That's genius, but we didn't do it.
It's like Denise said, the floor
was already wet, Johan slipped.
- It's the store's fault.
- It's not bad enough
these greedy corporations
have a monopoly on food?
Now they want to pull one over
on the little guy?
Well, wait until they see
how big this guy can get.
Yeah, get 'em, sis!
We about to get paid!
No, we're gonna make sure
these greedy fat cats
are held accountable.
By getting paid!
Ooh, I'mma look so good
in my Louis Vuitton.
So, what'd you decide to sign up for?
Answer wisely, Rainbow.
Um...
I know my mom has always said
that I shouldn't let anyone
dim my light.
But when Bryce was around,
my light was looking really nerdy.
Hey, dork, your books fell.
Loser.
Look!
There she is!
She's really here!
Wendy Whiteman.
♪ Remember my name ♪
♪ Fame ♪
♪ I'm gonna live forever ♪
♪ I'm gonna learn how to fly ♪
♪ High ♪
♪ I feel it comin' together ♪
♪ People will see me and cry ♪
♪ Fame ♪
♪ I'm gonna make it to heaven ♪
♪ Light up the sky like a flame ♪
Shut up!
Wendy Whiteman is speaking.
Journalism.
Journalism connects us
to what's happening on our
block, and around the globe.
The news is our bulwark against tyranny.
It is the blood that flows
through the veins of democracy.
I've never thought
of the news like that.
I guess it's really important.
For career week, one lucky student and I
will research, write, and report
a news story
about your state champion
girls' volleyball team.
So, who is going to be
the lucky student?
Me!
Raise your hand, girl!
When else are you gonna be able
to do nerdy stuff that's still cool?
Me!
But journalism takes grit.
So, put your hand down
if you can't handle getting yelled at.
Or being judged
on your physical appearance.
Or being in a war zone
with bullets flying by.
Oh. Please pick me, Miss Whiteman!
All three of those things
happened to me in one day
when our commune was raided.
Huh. I like a lady with a story.
You're in.
♪ Baby, look at me ♪
♪ And tell me what you see ♪
This just in,
my life is awesome.
- Yeah, it is.
- ♪ Remember my name ♪
♪ Fame ♪
So, I made the conscious decision
to accompany my sister's dusty
white husband to the store
to pick up said spices.
Normally, I would go to
the store on the west side,
but my "friend" Hakeem...
Bald Hakeem, not
Little Hakeem... works there,
and I didn't want him to think
I was with a white man.
So, I went to the freezer section
to try the new Hungry Man meals
my girlfriend Lorraine
had told me about.
By the way, Lorraine works
at that grocery store.
And she drive a Volvo.
Something ain't adding up.
Let me stop you right there,
if that's even possible.
But I haven't gotten to the
particulars of the incident yet.
For this arbitration,
you just need to focus
on the relevant facts.
It's a relevant fact that
Lorraine is up to no good.
Listen, when we do this for real,
you don't have to do the snap...
up, down, or diagonal.
And, uh, I'll introduce you as Denise.
You don't have to wear
two earrings that say that.
Oh, and maybe you should shave
your mustache
so people don't think
you a dirty-movie star.
Paul, are you sure
you didn't see anything?
Not even out of the corner of your eye?
Please?
I told you, Santi was dancing.
Would you be comfortable
lying under oath?
Of course not.
What's wrong with her testimony?
Well, for one thing, the
arbitrator doesn't need to hear
everything that happened
on "Falcon Crest."
She doesn't watch "Falcon Crest."
She's a "Dynasty" girl.
Don't you have, like,
a "job interview" voice?
Now my accent's not good enough?
None of these things should
matter if I'm telling the truth.
This is how these things work, Dee.
I-It's not like he's saying
you should become a different person.
No, I'm absolutely saying
she needs to become a different person.
Perhaps someone who doesn't know
anyone named "Bald Akeem."
It's Hakeem.
So... what do you think
of my story research?
I would've gotten it done sooner,
but, you know, I'm 12.
You're what Barbara Walters
calls a "natural story hound."
You're gonna be a hit when this airs.
I'm sorry.
- "Airs"?
- Yep.
Like on TV?
I know it sounds scary,
but it's fine.
You just have to show people
who you are.
So...
who the heck are you, Rainbow Johnson?
Well, I grew up on the commune, and...
Over the next half hour,
Wendy and I got deep.
Did you live, like, in tents?
Or did you have houses?
She told me how she was also
the oldest of three,
how she also felt like
an outsider at my age.
She even told me what went down
at the station's Christmas party,
which was so not appropriate.
Anyway, no one ever opened up
to me like that before.
It really made me feel special.
I get it.
Being different is hard.
As the only woman in the news room,
I'm either too brassy or too meek.
But I eventually figured it out,
and I'm sure you will, too.
Rainbow?
You missed class.
- Miss Whiteman, hi.
- Hi.
I need you to sign
this form excusing her.
Sure.
Can you make it out to my niece?
Her name is Miss Collins.
He can't just talk to me
any old kind of way.
He doesn't think I can give
a simple deposition
to demonstrate negligence
on the part of a business owner?
Was that from "Night Court?"
So?!
Look, I'mma tell the truth
the way I want to,
and if they don't believe me,
screw them.
Okay, I know it feels icky
to tone yourself down for these folks,
but if we're going to hold
those people accountable,
then you'll have to play ball.
Hold on, Alicia.
You're saying that who I am as a person
is the only thing getting in the way
of us getting what we want?
I'm saying I'm in court rooms every day.
I use any little thing
about a witness to discredit them.
I don't want to see
that happen to my sister.
I thought black folks like you
practicing law
was gonna change how they see us.
Look, I'll do my best,
but if you're saying them believing me
depends on me talking a certain way,
then you part of the problem.
Mind your business!
Uh-huh! It's me!
Go Santi! Uh-huh!
- Johan, can I sign your cast?
- Go me! Go me!
Go me! Look at me!
What?!
Leave some room for me to sign!
Hey, Santi, you want to come
sign my cast?
So you can sell it when I become famous?
Uh... that's a no.
As an adult, when my sister
wants attention,
she just fakes a pregnancy.
But before that was an option,
she had to be more creative.
It's on the left. You got that?
The desire to be the center of attention
definitely did not run in the family.
I was starting to wonder
if I was ready to make the news.
In three, two...
I-I-I'm here
with the Mondale School's
Lady Roadrunner Volleyball Team.
Ladies of ball court...
Volley great...
State great...
State champ great...
Uh, Roadrunners...
Okay, cut.
Come here, come here.
Don't worry so much.
The first time I was on camera,
I tripped Eartha Kitt
with my microphone cord.
So you'll be fine.
Just remember, breathe...
...and smile. Yeah!
Breathe and smile.
Good, you're doing great. Go, go, go.
Smile.
Let's talk to the team general.
Team captain.
Let's talk to the team captain.
Face the camera.
- Team...
- The microphone is shaking.
Talk.
Okay, cut.
Okay... um...
A lot of people have
a natural talent for this.
You do not.
Well, I am more interested in...
Pursue that, whatever that is.
It's science.
Honestly, I bet
you'd be really good at that.
Well, I'm already a commune weirdo.
I can't stack "science nerd" on top.
If you love science, go for it.
Sorry, Miss Whiteman,
but you'll never understand.
You're perfect and beautiful.
You get to be yourself every day,
and everyone adores you.
I'm just a weird mixed girl.
Hey, hey, hang on, hang on.
Um...
I'm sorry I didn't tell you
this earlier, but...
I'm also a weird mixed girl.
Well, I'm not weird, but...
...I am mixed.
My dad is black.
I thought you were white.
Everybody does. I mean...
Look, back in the '60s,
my mentor told me
it was best to keep it a secret
because he was afraid
it would ruin my career.
But luckily, things are different now.
So say it loud.
You're a mixed science nerd
and you're proud.
If things are so different now,
then why don't you tell the truth?
Well, it's just that people
already think one thing about me,
and I'm not sure it's a good
idea to switch things up.
- But it was all built on a lie.
- Well...
How can you tell me
to be proud of who I am
when you're scared of what we are?
Rainbow...
If a famous news anchor can't be proud,
what hope do I have?
You never forget the first time
someone you respect disappoints you.
And the last thing you want
in that moment is a party.
If you get rich and famous from this,
can you buy me a hand hook?
I just think my body
needs a little more metal.
I talked to Denise.
She's going to tone it way down.
So, somewhere between
Jimmy Walker and Mr. T?
You owe her an apology.
You insulted her.
I gave her legal advice.
I guess she told you I'mma play ball.
Thank you.
And evidently, I owe you an apology.
- But trust me...
- Okay, stop talking.
Unh-unh, unh-unh.
...exactly who you are
just isn't perfect
for every situation...
or any situation
outside of "The Phil Donahue Show."
Anyway, glad you came to your senses.
That's when Mom realized
that she had always told me
never to dim my light,
but she was snuffing out her sister's.
Okay, that's it.
We're not doing this.
Denise is gonna tell what happened
in her own words and in her own voice.
I am?
If the court can't accept her
for who she is,
then the court should change,
not my sister.
Right, because us old white guys
love to change.
Santi, come on.
Let's watch your sister on TV.
The news is about to start. Let's go.
Oh. So, you noticed I was gone.
Look, that's enough.
I know you're upset
because your brother and sister
have been getting the attention,
but guess what?
The world does not revolve
around you, young lady.
I don't get it.
We are a family.
We support each other.
Sometimes you are in the spotlight,
and sometimes you are
in the stands, cheering.
This just happens to be
one of those times
where it's your turn to cheer.
I was born for the spotlight.
Well, then it's good you're
out of it every now and then,
because then you'll appreciate
it more when it comes back.
Now, you can come and watch
with us if you want,
but only if you're big enough
not to take away
from someone else's moment.
Hey.
Can I sign your cast now?
Of course.
I saved you the best spot.
Just keep it PG, okay?
Fine.
- Shh! Here it is.
- Here we go.
And now, congratulations
to the Mondale School's
Lady Roadrunners,
who ran away with the state
championship in volleyball.
To tell you all about it
is Mondale student Rainbow Johnson.
I'm Rainbow Johnson.
She sure is.
All of us here at Eyewitness Nine News
want to recognize Rainbow for
her intensive research,
strong writing, and the ability
to say her name.
And on a personal note...
I got into journalism
to report the truth.
But this charming, dynamic young lady
made me realize how harmful it
can be not to live the truth.
I'm half black.
I kept that a secret because somehow,
I thought it would be for the best.
But hiding who you are
doesn't do the world any favors.
So, that's my story.
Thank you, Rainbow.
So, even though code switching
might sometimes feel necessary,
if we do it too much,
we lose who we are.
He slipped on the water
from that leaky freezer.
Now, I had come from the other aisle
from getting my rash cream...
make sure you don't put that down.
♪ The time has come for me ♪
- And I liked who I was.
- ♪ To break out of this shell ♪
So now nothing was more important to me
than following my passion.
- Hey, Rainbow.
- Not even Bryce.
And thank goodness, because as you know,
I grew up to be a badass doctor.
- I save lives.
- Hey.
Not sure if I've ever
mentioned that before.
♪ I'm coming out ♪
I still can't believe Wendy Whiteman
talked about our daughter on the news.
And she was honest about being mixed.
- Mm.
- Good for her.
We really gonna pretend
like we didn't already know?
Really?
Remember when she did that story
and she knew a little too much
about cocoa butter?
- Hmm.
- So, what I want to know is
how many other secret
black people are out there,
and how does one spot them?
You can't.
They everywhere.
Shoot, Richard Dawson,
Jacques Cousteau,
Princess Diana,
the daddy from "The Jetsons"...
all black.
Allegedly.
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com