Melrose Place (1992–1999): Season 5, Episode 24 - From Here to Maternity - full transcript

Woman: Morning, Doctor.

Your wife has called
several times already today.

Michael: Put her through
to the office.

What happened, Megan?
Did you get busted again?

Michael, don't, okay?
You've got to believe me.

I could never go back
to that life.

Look, it's like I told you
at the police station.

I was set up by Josh
and Kimberly.

Michael, please
don't shut me out.

I love you.

I just need to know
what I can do to prove it.



Look, I don't know, okay?

I just need some time
to sort my feelings out.

How much time?

I don't know.

I got patients waiting.
I'll call you later, okay?

But I don't even know
where you're staying.

And you don't need to know.

Why? Are you...

back at the beach house
with Kimberly?

You know, frankly,
Megan, at the moment

I'd rather spend
my nights with Peter

than either one of you.

Michael...
Don't call me.

I'll call you.



Mrs. Bowen,
what are you doing here?

Well, I'm certainly not
looking for a quickie.

Excuse me?

I read all about you

and your occupation
in the newspapers.

God only knows
what kind of perversion

went on in this house.

Nothing went on here,
okay, this is my home.

No, it's mine.

And I won't rent to trash.

You have 24 hours
to vacate the premises.

Look, you can't
throw me out, okay?

I have a lease.

So call the cops.

Tell them your landlord
won't rent to hookers.

24 hours. If your crap
isn't out of here,

I will have it incinerated!

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ I don't wanna lose you ♪

♪ I don't even know
what I feel ♪

♪ I start to lose you ♪

♪ If you love me
I might leave for a while ♪

♪ I don't want to lost you ♪

♪ But you never show
what you feel ♪

♪ So what's the difference? ♪

♪ If you hate me
I might stay for a while ♪

♪ I know the one who wants you ♪

♪ Waiting on line
for your seed ♪

♪ But if she
ever knew you well ♪

♪ She'd never grab my disease ♪

Morning.

Hi.

Got any more coffee?

No, actually, this is it.

I gotta get to the market.

It's yours, if you want it.

Oh, thanks.

I can't even focus
in the morning

until I've had my first cup.

Would you, um,
help me with this?

So, where do you
think you'll be living

now that Kyle's thrown you out?

I figured that
I'd just stay here

with you for a while.

That's okay, isn't it?

Sure, but you should
probably start looking

for a place of your own.

What are you saying, exactly?

Well, nothing, it's just
that I don't want

to get into anything right away,

Anything permanent anyway,

Well, call me crazy,
but I just assumed

that I was leaving
one relationship for another.

I gotta get to the office.

Yeah, I gotta get going, too.

I got some things
to straighten out

with Kyle about the restaurant.

Good luck, then.

Guess I'll see you later.

Peter, wait.

♪ ♪

Now you can go.

I just don't think
you're in any position

to raise a teenager, Matt.

I mean, you know, you did have
an addiction problem

just a few months back.

You were also arrested
for soliciting

an undercover police officer.

I admit I've been
through some rough times,

but I got help.

It's in the past.

Still, it doesn't
exactly make you

a proper role model for a
16-year-old girl, now, does it?

Well, my brother thought I was,

otherwise why would
he have made me.

Chelsea's legal guardian?

Because he didn't think
he was going to die

in a plane crash while
Chelsea was still in her teens.

Wow, do you really think
so little of me?

Matt, I feel very strongly

about Chelsea living with me,

at least until
she goes to college.

That's at least
three years away.

Hey... I'll decide
what's best for me.

I'm not a child.

Nobody said that you were.

You know, any court
in this country

would let me live with
whoever I damn well please.

Ad it doesn't please me
to live with you.

You're old, and this house is
like a sick shrine to Grandpa.

Chelsea! You apologize
to your grandmother.

No way, I'm not apologizing
for my feelings.

So if she won't
let me live with you

because you've got
sugar in your pants,

then I'll just go live
with my mother.

Hey, watch your mouth.

You don't even know
where your mother is.

Yes, I do, she's in Europe.

Yeah, well, it's a big place.

Yeah, well, I'll bum around
till I find her. Big deal.

Over my dead body.

I say that we try
a less drastic solution.

Let's say maybe
Chelsea comes spends

a few days at my place.

Fine, but I'm not
making any promises.

You don't look very happy
for a person who just

got ordered to take a vacation.

How would you feel
if you just found out

one of your organs
was incompetent?

Is it just me,
or is it stuffy in here?

You heard what Dr. Barnett said,
a lot of women

have incompetent cervixes.

Right, I bet a lot
of men don't have

incompetent anything
because the male doctors

run the medical establishment.

I'm not having
this conversation.

Why don't you lay down.
I'll open the window for you.

This is ridiculous!

I would never do anything
to hurt our baby.

Why do I have to stay
off my feet for 2 weeks?

I don't even feel sick.

Come on. It'll be fun.

You'll figure out
something to do.

In the meantime, why don't
you call Amanda

and tell her
you're not coming in.

No, I'll call Billy
and make him do it.

Morning! Morning.

Guys, I'm gonna need
a 6-top over there

for a 12:30 reservation, thanks.

Oh, yeah, sure.

I don't know what the hell
you think you're doing,

but I want you out
of my restaurant.

Kyle, I'm not gonna let you
take this away from me.

No, I'm not gonna let you
take this away from me.

You already took our marriage,

I'm not gonna lose
anything else.

Tommy, you've been promoted.

You'll be working
the front today.

Nobody takes over for me
unless I say so.

Last time I checked, the sign
out front read "Kyle's."

Period. End of discussion.

Until this restaurant burns down

or you take legal
action, I am here!

Fine, I'll take legal action.

Mario, why don't you go and see
if that delivery's coming in?

I'll go check on it, boss.

Kyle, why don't you just
be honest and admit

that you still want me here

because you have
feelings for me,

just like I have
feelings for you.

I love you...

I told you never
to touch me again.

You love me? Hmm?

What about Peter Burns?

You got feelings
for him, too, right?

Well, yeah.

I love him. Yeah.

But I love both of you.

I want both of you.

Yeah, well, I hate to be the one
to break this to you, Taylor,

but that's not the way it works.

You know something?
You disgust me.

So if you're not gonna
get out of my restaurant,

at least get the hell
out of my kitchen.

Fine!

Hey, Amanda?

I just got off
the phone with Alison.

She's not coming in.

Everything's okay, she didn't
lose the baby or anything,

but the doctor said
she has to stay

off her feet for 2 weeks.

Oh, how convenient for her.

Well, you can tell
our mother-to-be

that just because she doesn't
have to be in the office

doesn't mean she has
to stop working.

I want you to messenger
all her files to her,

and if she doesn't have
a fax machine, buy her one,

but dock her pay for it.

I'll get right on it.

Amanda! Wait up.

How did it go
with the divorce lawyer?

No comment.

Amanda, I swear I'm not trying

to charm you
into bed with my concern.

I'm asking as a friend.

I just want to know
if you're all right.

Of course I'm all right.

And I'd be a lot better
if you left me alone.

Hey, Peter!
Peter, you have a minute?

No, not really, I got
a bypass scheduled. Why?

Well...
What's this?

This is a memo
detailing new procedures

for waste disposal
at the hospital.

The board made a big stink

about wanting you
to institute them ASAP.

I can't believe
I forgot about this.

Yeah, well, we've both been
a little distracted lately

with our personal problems,

but, you know, I thought
I'd be a good egg

and write them up for you.

I guess you've had a lot
of extra free time.

I heard you
and your new wife split up.

Well, we're not split up...

I mean, not formally, anyway.

Listen, that's beside the point.

The point being that you
and I make a good team.

Well, I agree with that.

Great, then, what would you say

about me helping you out with
this chief-of-staff thing?

I mean, I could
lighten your load,

say, as a co-chief of staff?

And then in return,
you can help me spruce up

my tarnished reputation.

You're joking, right?

I mean, you can't
be serious about this.

No, no, I'm very serious.

Michael, I have surgery.

Thanks for saving my butt.

Dr. Mancini, you have
some messages.

These are all
from the same person.

Who's Mrs. Bowen?

She's your wife's landlord.

That would be your present wife.

Number four, isn't it?

And she wants all
of your belongings

out of the house by tonight.

And did she say why?

No...

but I'm sure we'll
be reading about it

in tomorrow morning's newspaper.

Sydney, I don't want you
to take this the wrong way,

and I'm not trying to interfere
with your creative process,

but don't you think you need
a more substantial hook?

You know, nylon rope
wouldn't be a bad idea

and maybe you should cordon off
these attaché cases.

Um, enough.

You may think you're
the only creative person

on this planet, but you're not.

Like I said,
I'm not trying to criticize

your vision of the working woman

climbing the corporate ladder...

And always slamming
into the glass ceiling?

Right.

It's just this whole
display is unstable.

I mean, it's an accident
waiting to happen.

What if someone
trips over the cases

and then ends up suing us?

"A," it's not unstable,

and "B," you're the only one

who would trip over these cases.

Everyone else is going to see

that obviously they're
part of the display

and walk around them.

So, if you're through
criticizing for the day,

why don't you go in the back
and start unpacking those boxes?

For the record,
it was not a criticism.

Hi. Hello.

Can I help you with something?

Oh, no, dear, just browsing.

Oh, but it's such
a beautiful shop,

I'm sure I'll come home
with something.

Where are your jackets?

Well, most of them
are over there,

but we don't have a very
large selection of sizes.

Oh, that's all right.

♪ ♪

Oh, my God.

Uh... okay, um...
All right, uh...

Are you okay?

Don't touch me! Ugh!

Oh! Oh! Ohh... my arm... agh!

Dr. Mancini?

Yeah, you must be
Megan's landlord.

You want to tell me what's
going on around here?

All I know is
your wife moved out.

Did she leave
a forwarding address?

No, but she did box up
your things for you though.

They're in the bedroom.

And, um, she left
an envelope for you.

It's in the kitchen.

Thanks.

"Dear Michael,

"guess I'm not
good enough for anybody.

Megan."

You bastard, you changed
the locks on the restaurant.

Yeah, and?

I want a key, or I will sue
your ass so fast...

I figured that would
be your reaction,

so I'm willing to buy you out.

You sign these papers,
I'll give you a check

for $150,000, and then
I'll forget I ever knew you.

Pfft! You don't have
that kind of money, Kyle.

I took a second out
on the Boston restaurant.

I am being generous,
considering the fact

that we've only been
open 6 months. Sign.

Generous or not, I'm not
agreeing to anything,

and I won't be pushed.

Where the hell do you get off?

You're the one that's
having the affair.

You are the one the screwed
around on our marriage,

and I want you out of here.

Never happen.
Just get me the key.

Why this guy, Taylor?
Why Peter Burns?

What is so special
about him, huh?

Is it like Amanda said?

You had the hots for Burns

since we moved
into this building?

You really want to know
how long I've loved him, Kyle?

Ever since Peter
married my sister Beth.

Peter Burns...
is your brother-in-law?

The first man I ever loved,

ever believed in,

and the only man that
I've ever felt safe with.

Fate brought us together
again, Kyle.

No, it's what's down there
that brought you together.

You know what, Kyle,

every hour of every day
that you and I were married,

Peter was in my heart.

It was always Peter.

Megan, this is a surprise.

Ooh, you look terrible.

Oh, well, I haven't been getting

much beauty sleep lately,

what with being in jail
and my marriage breaking up.

In fact, I was just
wandering the beach.

Have you, uh...

Have you ever noticed
how many homeless people

there are out there?

No, but I haven't been
getting out much lately.

Well...

You're not dying anymore.

I guess you've been too busy

wrecking my life to take a walk.

Megan...
Save it.

I already feel like Cinderella
coming home from the ball.

I don't need a pep talk

from one of
my wicked step sisters.

Why don't I make us
some breakfast

and in the meantime you can...

you can take a shower and...

Yeah!

And while I'm in there
you can call Josh!

No, that's okay.

I think you've already
done enough, Kimberly.

I guess I should be going.

I just...

I wanted to let you know...

that you won.

Megan, wait.

You're not going to go back
to your old life, are you?

What did you think,
I'd uh... go to law school

or maybe take up the violin?!?

If you need some money,
I can write you a check.

♪ ♪

The one thing
I know how to do...

is make money.

I never meant to hurt you.

Maybe not,

but you take somebody
who's been satisfied

with bread and water,

you give them
champagne and caviar,

you think it's easy to go back?

Hey, this is not your problem.

Will you...

will you keep in touch?

Yeah.

I'll write every day.

Come in.

Hi.

Hello?

Oh, hi, hi, it's Sydney.

I'm Sydney Andrews.

Oh.

I wasn't sure if you'd
be up for visitors.

Oh, you brought me flowers.

How sweet.

I bet if I broke
my neck in Macy's,

Mr. Macy wouldn't
come and see me.

Well, I don't think
there is a Mr. Macy.

You broke your neck?

Oh, it's just
a figure of speech.

These flowers are so lovely.

They must have cost
a small fortune.

Aw, well...

you're worth it.

You did take a spill
in my boutique.

So, um... how are
you feeling, Hilda?

Really... I mean, you look good!

I bet the doctor said
you can go home soon.

Well...

to tell you the truth,

I am feeling kind of punkish.

Oh, this neck brace
is just killing me.

Oh, but don't you worry.
I'll be okay.

I'm just such a clumsy ox.

It was all my fault.

Oh! I'm so glad
to hear you say that.

I couldn't agree with you more!

Dr. Shulman,
I have been covering.

Peter's butt for weeks.

With his marriage breaking up

and him having an affair
with a married woman,

I mean he hardly has time
to micro-manage the hospital.

Michael, I had
no idea you disliked

your new chief-of-staff
as much as I do.

I don't dislike Peter.

I just don't think he's
the right man for the job.

I mean hell, even Peter
didn't think so!

Why else would
he have written you

a letter of recommendation
on my behalf?

What letter?

Peter never recommended
you for the job.

He just threw his hat
into the ring.

That son-of-a-gun, you see,
he stabbed me in the back.

Even more reason that you
and I should work together.

Dr. Shulman, I deserve
to be chief-of-staff.

Michael, I'm afraid that
you misunderstood me.

I may not like Peter,

I may think that he's
a self-centered pig,

but that doesn't change the fact

that you're not
chief-of-staff material.

Whoa, whoa... and Peter is?
Why is that?

Because Peter is smarter,
better-looking,

and not married to a prostitute.

Just be glad that
you're working, Michael.

Oh, glad you're in.

I need a favor.

Forget it.

Peter, you don't understand,
it's just a teeny favor.

See, this woman
came into my boutique

and sort of slipped,
which wasn't my fault,

and now she's in the hospital...

your hospital.

No. N-O.

Come on, Peter, I just want
to look at her chart.

I can't show you
a patient's chart.

I mean, that's unethical.

Besides, you're the last person

I would do a favor for.

Oh, I see.

Someone who's running
around on his wife

and boffing
his next-door neighbor

is talking about ethics.

All right, I want you
out of this office now!

You don't feel at all guilty

about your affair
with Taylor, do you?

Guilt is a waste
of time, Sydney.

You know, I only slept with Kyle
that one time at the restaurant,

and I felt horrible.

You probably slept with
Taylor like, a million...

Uh... I probably shouldn't have

said what I just said.

Oh, I guess it doesn't
really matter

now that everybody's
marriage is broken up.

Right! I mean,
it's ancient history.

No more damage to be done.

Exactly.

So...

So good-bye, Sydney.

Good to see you.

Oh, Jake, I am
so glad you're home.

Sorry I'm late,
I brought dinner.

What's with the loud music?

You must be starved,
I'll get some plates.

Forget about the food!
Come here.

You are not going to believe
what I heard today.

What? Did the doctor call?

No, no, no,
it's not about the baby.

So, I was sitting
here on the couch

when Taylor storms
into the courtyard

and has a huge
blow-out with Kyle.

She told him that she
has been in love with Peter

since she was 15.

How is this possible?

Well, it turns out they've
known each other for years

because, get this,

Peter was married
to Taylor 's sister.

Tell me again how you happened
to hear this information.

I heard it through the window

like you can hear the music.

So, I am sure
Amanda doesn't know.

Should I tell her?

No, I think you should
stay out of her marriage

and quit eavesdropping.

I wasn't eavesdropping!

You can hear everything
anybody says

in the courtyard
through our window.

Correction...

you can only hear
what you're trying to hear,

and now that the window
is closed

that temptation is gone.

Let's have some dinner.

Hey, if you're subleasing
your apartment

to a bunch of degenerates,

I will evict
your butt so fast...

I'm not subleasing!

I've got my 16-year-old
niece living with me, all right?

My late brother left her
to me in his will.

It's been a rough
adjustment for her, I'm sorry.

Well, you know what,
I'm going through

a rough adjustment of my own

and your familial obligations

are not making it any easier.

It's just music.

You wanna tell me
what's really wrong?

I'm sorry, my personal life
has just gone to hell.

Peter and I are
getting a divorce.

Well, as a veteran
of the love wars,

you have my sympathy.

By any chance, does your niece
like to play with matches?

Oh!

Looks like she used
your sofa as an ashtray.

Ugh! Can you get the door?

Get the door open.

Hey, what's with all the smoke?

Chelsea, what are you doing
smoking cigarettes?

Well, I don't know.

Getting a high off of nicotine,

killing a few brain cells?

So, you're hanging out
with babes now, Uncle Matt?

I didn't know
you swung both ways.

Chelsea...

this is Amanda Woodward,
my landlord.

Oh, so, what am I
supposed to do,

kiss her feet and ask her
for a break on the rent?

What is she,
some kind of demon seed?

What are you,
some kind of bitch?

Behave! You're smoking
cigarettes,

you're setting
the place on fire,

and you're
insulting my landlord!

You're out of control!

Amanda, I am sorry.

So is Chelsea.

All I have to say is you'd
better put a muzzle

on this little firebug

or you'll both
be out on the street.

Turn down the music.

I have had it.

You're stuck with me!
That's what the will said,

so somebody better
lighten up a little.

Tomorrow you are going
back to your grandmother's.

Is that a threat?

No, it is my final
word on the subject.

You could have mailed
those after you signed them.

I haven't signed them,
and I don't intend to.

This restaurant would not exist

if it weren't for me.

Right, it's your hostessing

that made us a 4-star success.

Among other things.

Any idiot can do
your job, Taylor.

You know, if you get off
offending me,

you just go right ahead,
'cause I can handle it.

But I'm staying.

We'll see.

But I don't want to have
to look at your face,

so if you need anything
from me or my kitchen,

I want you to send
a waiter back here...

to get it.

Fine.

Aah! Geez.

Here, let me help you with that.

Kyle...

No, no, I got it.

Kyle, at least let me
take you to the hospital.

No, I don't need your help.

♪ ♪

Hey, it's past noon.

Are you checking out,

or you just forget the 50 bucks
you owe me for another night?

Listen, I'm a little short.

I need a couple days
to get my act together.

If you could just
spot me one more night,

I'll make sure you get the money

by the end of the week.

We can work something out.

Thanks.

I know what you do, lady.

And if you don't troll enough
tonight on the boulevard,

we'll take it out in trade.

Don't worry,
you'll get your money.

Okay, we'll see you
in a couple weeks, then.

Burns-Mancini, please hold.

Dr. Mancini,
your wife's on line two.

You want me to take a message?

No, no, I'll take that.

Megan, where are you?

Nowhere, I just
wanted to make sure

you got your stuff
from that house, you know,

and those other things
I left for you.

Yeah, yeah, I got the checkbook

and the credit card
and the ring, and...

Look, why don't you
come by the office

so I can give them back to you?

Look, I don't want
to hurt you anymore.

Well, who's hurt?

Look, I was just confused.

But now that I've had
a few days to think...

No, it's over.

I know that
because of what I am.

Our marriage never had
a chance, you know,

it was just a...

it was just a fantasy.

No, honey. Honey, it was real.

Our love is real.

Bye, Michael. Megan...

Honey, wait.

Look, just tell me
where you are, okay?

Megan?

Hello?

Listen, um...

Um, I just got cut off.

Can you get that
line back for me?

Sure, just punch in star-6-9.

It automatically
re-dials the number

your wife was calling from.

Okay, thanks.

Hyland Sunset Strip Motel.

Have a seat.

I'm going to give you
a shot of lidocaine

to numb you up.

Ahem. Dr. Burns.

Patient in three
needs EKG, stat.

I'll finish up here.

Like hell you will.

Well, that's gratitude
for you, huh?

You know, it's not every day
that the chief-of-staff

offers to sew up a hash slinger
hurt in the line of duty.

But, then again, I owe you
for a few broken ribs, don't I?

If you come anywhere
near me, you're the one

that's gonna to need stitches.

Well, aren't you full of
righteous indignation.

That sounds funny,
coming from a man

who's sipped from the old
adultery fountain himself...

And more than once, mind you.

Let's see, there was
the waitress in Boston

and of course,

I know that you
slept with Sydney.

You slept with Sydney?

Yeah, I...

I slept with Sydney, once.

You sanctimonious hypocrite.

What the hell
does that make you?

How many times didn't you
sleep with this bozo?

You go to hell.

I'll get that other guy
come in and finish you up, okay?

I hope you have insurance.
He's a little green.

♪ ♪

Got no vacancies.

Trust me, I'm not
looking for a room.

I'm looking for a woman,
Megan Lewis.

She might be
registered under Mancini.

Got nobody here
under either name.

Well, why don't you check
your guest register,

or maybe I'll check it for you.

Go ahead, but I got
a photographic memory.

5'7", long blond hair,
body that won't quit?

That would be
Mary Smith, room 102,

but she's not here.

Well, do you know where she is?

No, but it's after 10:00.

Isn't that a prime time
for her kind?

That's my wife you're
talking about, pal.

Now do you want to
tell me where she is?

Most of the girls
work the boulevard,

a couple of blocks east of here.

Jerk.

Are you sure I can't
get you something,

like a piece of fruit
or a glass of milk

or something?

No, Sam, honestly I'm fine.

I'm just grateful
for the company.

Kyle: Syd, open up! We need
to have a conversation!

Is that Kyle?

Yeah, you know, why don't
you just close the window?

Syd, come on, open up!

Really? Aren't you
the least bit curious

of why he wants
to talk to Sydney?

Jake's got this thing
about eavesdropping.

So, in other words,
close the window?

Oh, Sam, come on. Kyle: Sydney!

Shh.

What is this
with all the knocking?

Syd, why are you going...
I was in the shower.

Why are you going around telling
everybody that we slept together?

I'm not.

I know you told Peter
and now Taylor knows.

Oh, my.

Maybe I did mention
something in passing to him.

It was just one of those
faux pas, and...

I'm really sorry.

What can I do to
make it up to you?

You can refrain from
broadcasting

the details of our night
together at the restaurant.

Okay?

Yeah.

Sydney: Kyle?

Kyle?

Alison:
Sam, what are they saying?

She is such a hypocrite.

What? What did you hear?

You're never gonna believe this.

Sydney and Kyle had an affair.

No. Yes.

And they did it
at the restaurant.

In the kitchen or on a table?

Who cares?

I'm never gonna eat there again.

♪ ♪

Better take it to the curb

if you want to sell it, honey.

Megan, come on, get in.

Go away, Michael!

No! Come on.

What are you doing here?

You are my wife.

I want you to get in this car
so I can take you home.

I'm a prostitute, okay?
I belong here.

We're both prostitutes.

Practically everybody
I know is a prostitute.

At least everybody
on this street.

Would you butt out?

Come on, Megan.

You know, the truth is
we're as good as anybody,

better than most people think.

So uh... you want to
come on in or what?

Honey, if you won't go, I will.

Oh, mitts off, he's mine.

This belongs to you.

You didn't actually
do anything, did you?

No, Michael,

I didn't.

I couldn't.

Chelsea mention that
she wasn't speaking to me?

No.

Except for our silent meals,

she's been in her room
since you dropped her off.

I shouldn't have yelled at her.

She nearly burned
down your apartment.

Yeah, but she just did it
to get my attention,

and since I'm in med school,

I don't have any attention
to give her.

Hey, Mom.

Hmm?

I think you should
take custody of her.

Good.

I knew you'd see things
my way eventually.

I'm just trying to do what
I think is best for Chelsea.

Okay, okay.

I think I'll go
give her the good news.

Chelsea, it's Matt,
I need to talk to you.

Matt: I hate you all.

What's wrong now?

Nothing.

How refreshing.

You are such
a two-faced... homewrecker.

Pardon me?

I told myself that I wasn't
gonna say anything,

but I just look
at you and I get so...

So what?

So... so disappointed.

How can you just sleep
with another woman's

husband like that,
and then bad-mouth Taylor

when she's just
an innocent victim

of your unfettered
sexual desire?

Um...

I don't know where
you get your information,

but it's wrong.

Where do you get
your information?

Are either of you
Sydney Andrews?

Don't look at me,
I'm not the one

with the scarlet "A"
on my chest.

Ignore her,
I'm Sydney, and you are?

Oh, just a messenger.

Consider yourself served.

I drive all the way to
Wilshire Memorial Hospital,

spend 20 bucks on flowers,

and now this faker is suing me?

Hilda Morris, plaintiff,
versus Sydney Andrews

and "Sydney's" boutique,
defendant.

Yet another victim
of your conceit.

Maybe the next time
that I tell you

that a display is unstable,

you'll listen to me.

For the record, I hope Hilda
cleans your clock.

Mario said that you wanted
to have a word with me.

This is a non-negotiable
contract

for running the restaurant.

I already told you
my feelings...

on that subject.

Well, the attorney
that I consulted

thought that you might
want to reconsider,

given the carnal nature

of your relationship
with Sydney.

So I will work Monday,
Wednesday, and Friday,

and you will work Tuesday,
Thursday, Saturday,

and we will split the profits
right down the middle.

♪ ♪

You may have
won this round, Taylor,

but the battle has just begun.

Hey. Hey, how are you doing?

You're just the man
I'm looking for.

Bring me another vodka martini.

Make it quick.

You know, I think that maybe

you've had enough
for the evening.

Mm. Well...

when I don't feel
the pain anymore,

then I've had enough.

Maybe what you need is a friend.

Okay, friend, um...

my marriage to uh...

Peter is over. Finito.

And it's all my fault.

How do you figure that?

Well, you probably
figure that because

Peter and Taylor live together

that it was his wandering eye
that broke us up,

but that's not true. It was me.

I made his eye wander.

I pushed him away.

I mean, on our honeymoon,
I even...

I even um...

had the nerve to suggest

that there was
something going on

between the two of them,
and it was ridiculous

because he had just
gotten out of jail.

If I had trusted him,

if I had been a real wife...

Did you ever consider
that maybe the two of them

were connected before
you got married?

You must be drunk.

But um...

what did you mean
by that, exactly?

I didn't mean anything at all.

No, no, no, no,
now you're backpedaling.

Spit it out.

Okay.

I didn't hear this
first-hand, all right?

But I do have it
on good authority

that Peter and Taylor

have known each other for years.

Peter's first wife
was Taylor's sister.

I'm sorry, I shouldn't
have said anything.

No, no, no, no.
I'm glad you did.

Hey, I'm sorry I'm late.

I was stuck in traffic.

You know what, junior?

You're driving me somewhere.

What about our working dinner?

Ugh, that's the last thing
I want to think about.

Thanks.

Is she drunk? Uh-huh.

Just make sure she doesn't
do anything too crazy.

All right?

Stay in the car, Craig.

Amanda, why are you
torturing yourself like this?

Why can't you let
sleeping dogs lie?

They're dogs, all right.

And they certainly
have been lying.

What are you doing here?

Hey, hey, hold it,
I never invited you

and your boy toy in here.

Good evening! Don't get
dressed on my account.

Amanda, maybe
we should go, come on.

Don't be such a ninny, Craig.

I want to ask my soon-to-be
ex something.

So, were you having an affair

with this um...
This tramp

the entire time we were married?

My God, you're drunk.
Answer the question.

No, not until you started
bumping bodies

with Richie Rich over here.

Hey, don't deflect
this back on Amanda.

Yeah, you cheat.

Correction,
you're the cheat here.

I'm the betrayed husband.

You know, Amanda,
even if Peter had cheated

way back when with me,

it would have been justified

since you never loved him.

All you ever did
was criticize him.

You are such a bitch.

Amanda, come on, you're making
a fool out of yourself.

Go sober your girlfriend up.

You know what? I may be drunk,

but I am not too drunk

to remember
all our conversations.

How many times did I
ask you if there was anything

you hadn't told me about Taylor?

And how many times did you say
"No, nothing to tell?"

I guess it must
have slipped your mind

that Taylor was
your dead wife's sister.

You're kidding?

Cat got your tongue?

Not that it makes
any difference,

but the truth is
I didn't even recognize

Taylor at the beginning.

It was a coincidence she even
moved into the building.

A coincidence?

She moved into your building,

she showed up at your trial,
became your patient?

She even... she even vacationed
at your honeymoon hotel.

What are the odds?

♪ ♪

You know what, you two
deserve each other.

I hope you're very
miserable together.

Tell me it was a coincidence.

I can't.

I can't lie to you. Uh...

I did read about your case
in the Boston paper,

and I took the next flight out,

and I came down to see you
at the jail.

So this whole thing
was a set-up,

and I just walked right into it?

Peter, I love you...
No, stay away from me.

Just stay away.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪