Melrose Place (1992–1999): Season 3, Episode 5 - Non-Sexual Healing - full transcript

The perfect day off...

Waking up to the man I love,

incredible sex,

ocean waves breaking
in the background.

The stay of execution
hanging in the breeze.

Michael, don't joke
about last night.

That was the first time
since we've been together

that I feel like
we belong to each other.

I want us to be official.

But we can't do anything

until your divorce from
Sydney is out of the way.



Yeah, I'm working on it.

Good.

Oh, I can't wait until
we move out of LA!

Our transfer should come
through in a few days.

Mmm. Clean slates.

We can invent entire pasts,

be anyone we want to be.

Uh, frankly, Kimberly,

since I got my memory back,

I just remembered I'm
exactly who I want to be.

So don't go packing
your bags too fast.

I'm not in the mood to move.

Oh, and, uh,

yell when breakfast is
ready, will you, babe?



This just came, Miss Woodward.

Thanks.

Amanda, I'm sorry

to have to say goodbye
to you like this.

I know how hard
this is on you, um...

But there really was
no other way.

By the time you see this,

I'll be halfway to Mexico.

Jake has agreed
to take me on his boat.

It's like I always said.

Every man has his price,

even your precious Jake.

All I ask is please, honey,

try not to hate me.

We can't do any more here.

Why don't you call it in?

Right away.

What's going on, Officer?

That depends. Who's asking?

My name is Amanda Woodward.

Jake Hanson, the man who
charters "The Pretty Lady,"

is a friend of mine.

Looks like your friend
isn't here.

No. It looks like
his boat isn't here.

And my father may be on it.

His name is Palmer Woodward.

I believe your term for him
is fugitive from justice.

You can keep your
phone in your pocket.

I already told the FBI.

Does anybody have any idea

of where they might have gone?

One of the boat owners
saw your friend

take "The Pretty Lady"
out of the harbor

last night around 5:30.

It exploded off the coast of
Catalina around three this morning.

Matt.

Michael, what
are you doing here?

I got my memory back.

You got your memory back?

Mm-hmm.

How did... When did this happen?

Oh, a couple of days ago.

I'm in Fat City.

I've got Kimberly's devotion.

I just got my job back.

I'm getting all my
ducks in a row.

Michael, exactly how
much do you remember?

Oh, everything.

I might have forgotten a couple
of RBis here and there...

Michael. Look, I know that you think you
remember everything, but you don't.

I mean, you can't.

Look, trust me on this. I think you should
go home, you should pack some clothes.

You can stay
with me if you need to...

Why would I want to do that?

Michael. It was Kimberly
who tried to kill you.

First she tried to pin
it on Jane, then Sydney.

Now she knows that I know,

and she's trying to get me fired. You
don't know how much danger you're in.

I wouldn't worry about it.

In fact, come to think of it,
maybe you should keep your nose

out of other people's business.

What are you saying, Michael?

Did you know about Kimberly

and you're still
together with her?

How can you stay with a woman
who tried to kill you?

Do I judge your lifestyle, Matt?

Mr. Campbell?

Oh, uh, yeah?

I'm Elisabeth Wyatt, your
and Alison's new secretary,

assistant, right-hand person.

But if I had my choice,
assistant would be great.

Hi.

Welcome to D and D.
You can call me Billy.

Well, I guess I should tell
you all about the company,

but I'm new here as well.

I know. Three weeks
and four days,

formerly of Escapade magazine.

I liked your
dating service article.

Oh.

You looked great on the cover.

Thank you.

So, what exactly
is expected of me?

Typing, editing,
you know, proofreading.

Coffee?

No, no, I'm a one-cup-a-day guy.

But if I'm getting some for
myself, how do you take yours?

Black.

No caffeine.

Well, Elisabeth, did you know
that if you're new to LA,

and your name
starts with a vowel,

you get lunch free
on Wednesdays.

Today's Monday,
but Wednesday works.

Cool.

Um, could I
talk to you for a minute

about the Johnson-Larue account?

Sure. What's up?

Well, I better get going.

If you need me, I'll be in
central files

filing my little heart out.

See you later.

You know, working together
is tough enough as it is

without you flirting with
every woman in the office.

Flirting? She came over
to introduce herself.

Employers and employees
have to talk.

It breeds a harmonious
working place.

"If you're new to LA,"

and your name
starts with a vowel,

you get a free lunch"?

You used that same line on
me when I first met you.

Here are two campaigns
Larue's already turned down.

You should look them
over before the meeting.

Thank you.

I think that we should make the darts
horizontal instead of vertical.

Okay. Okay.

Hi. Hi.

What are you
doing here, Michael?

I came to see my wife.

See her on your own time. This
is my time... half of every hour.

Michael...

Looks like the
Sleazebag Hall of Fame

is missing a member.

Now, what would bring vermin
like you out into the daylight?

I know. You want to apologize.

No, Syd. I want a divorce.

And I want to
wake up tomorrow morning

and sing like Aretha Franklin.

Do the words "go to Hell"
mean anything to you?

Syd, I want that divorce. Now
we could do it the hard way

or we could do it the easy way.

Then again, we could just have
Kimberly reason with you.

You're such a damn
chicken, Michael.

Why don't you have the ladies' auxiliary at
the hospital back you up while you're at it?

I'm warning you, Syd.

No, Michael. We're warning you.
You want a divorce,

we'll think about what we
want and get back to you.

She's the boss.

You have the rest of the day
to think about it.

Amanda.

Amanda?

What do you want?

Brown water's been coming out
of my kitchen faucet all day.

I've left you three messages.

The plumber's name
is Dan Carroll.

He's listed in West LA.

Call him, have him fix it,
and charge it to me.

Um, you're the landlord.

Day laborers
are your department.

Get out.

What?

Leave me alone.

What's the matter?

I've never seen you like this.

Yeah, well, now you have,

so now you can go home.

Amanda, I'm trying
to be a friend.

My father used "The Pretty Lady"
to leave the country.

He either forced Jake
to take him

or Jake went along willingly.

The boat has apparently blown
up off the coast of Catalina.

There are no known survivors.

Oh, my God.

I know you have feelings
about this, too,

but right now I have my hands
full dealing with my own.

If you really want
to be a friend,

don't tell anyone what's
happened till the morning.

I'm all talked out,

and there's nothing
anyone can do anyway.

Okay, fine.

I'll call you
if I hear anything.

Okay.

Hi. Hi.

What are you doing here?

I was starving and I just couldn't
bear having breakfast alone.

That is so sweet.

Well, come on in. I'll
be ready in a minute.

Jane, I've been thinking about
what to ask for from Michael.

I might as well just figure out
what I want and get it over with.

He's not giving up.

That's probably true.

Good morning.

Hello.

Really, Jane, I mean, it's not
like he owns the beach house.

He's not working. He
doesn't even own his car.

All I know is in the husband
department,

the man owes me big time.

Oh, please, Mrs. Mancini.

You didn't exactly get "Good
Housekeeping" Seal of Approval.

Look, you know, Michael will be
back at work before you know it.

Why don't you base your
terms on his salary?

I've got a better idea.

Why don't you ask for Michael's
interest in the business,

then sell it to Jane.

Personally, I think
that's a great idea,

speaking of owing people.

What do you want me
to say, Jane?

I owe you everything,

and you're right as usual, okay?

I'm sorry. I didn't
mean it that way.

No, I'm sorry. You have always
done more than you had to.

You took me in,
you gave me this job,

and it's about time
I repaid you.

Fine. Whatever.
I'll see you later.

After you. Thanks.

Michael, it's me.

Sydney.

Look, I've decided
what I want and

I'm free tonight,

so why don't we talk about it
over dinner?

Good.

No. You make the reservations.

Oh, and, Michael,

make sure it's
someplace very expensive.

Amanda, um, could I talk to you?

Can it wait?

Uh, no, it can't.

What is it?

Billy's desk is just
too close to mine.

It's really awkward,

and it's interfering
with my work.

I'd really appreciate if you could
either move him or move me.

Billy's desk
is a problem for you?

Yeah.

Any problems
with your new chair?

No, it's fine.

Good. Then let's compare
problems, shall we?

"The Pretty Lady"
blew to smithereens

with enough explosives
to level a city block.

Jake and my father were on it,

are missing and presumed dead.

But don't you worry. I'll make
moving your desk a top priority.

Well, if you hear anything.

Yeah. Well, no.

If Jake's admitted there
or anywhere else, call me.

No.

All right.

All right, thanks, man. Bye.

Bad news?

Yeah.

Do you want to talk about it?

Um...

One of my friends was on a
boat that blew up and now

nobody can find him.

Well, it's more
complicated than that,

but basically, that's it.

A close friend?

Yeah.

I keep thinking they're find him

drinking some exotic beer
under a big palm tree,

wondering what all
the commotion's about.

I can't let myself believe that something
really bad has happened to him.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I can imagine how you feel.

Amanda's leaving early,

in case you have any questions
about the Larue account.

Thanks. I'm all set.

Have you heard any news
about Jake?

No. You?

No.

Oh, did you know him, too?

Yeah. I know him, too.

Call me if you hear anything.

More champagne?

Yes, please.

Syd, it's been my curse
that I love two women...

You and Kimberly.

It's just that
Kimberly came first.

And I abandoned her all
that time in Cleveland

after the accident,

so now I have to stay with her.

So take the 5,000.
Sign the papers.

Wait a minute.

You're telling me

that you're staying with
Kimberly out of guilt?

Guilt, remorse, shame...
What can I say?

A rose by any other name
would still stink.

Michael, you can't for a minute

believe that Kimberly
is helpless.

If they had to
invade Normandy again,

they'd put her in charge.

You said you loved me.

Before Kimberly came back,

you said you knew
we could be happy.

If anyone needs you,
Michael, it's me.

I don't know, Syd.

Seems to me you might be
just as nuts as she is.

I saw her drug you, Michael.

I know everything she did.

How could you stay with her?

Reasons you could
never comprehend.

I'm willing to
give you everything.

You don't understand.

No, you don't understand.

If we went to court, you'd
probably get nothing.

You were arrested for
prostitution, Sydney.

You signed a confession

that said you tried to kill me.

I'm only offering this money

because I have a heart of gold.

This is California, Michael...

Future earnings,
community property.

But I don't want any of it.

I don't want your property.

I don't want your money.

I don't want a divorce.
I just want you.

Yes.

And I want you...

to take the money.

Well, that's really
too bad then, isn't it?

Because I want your
share of the business.

You have until tomorrow,

or I'll sic a lawyer that'll take
full advantage of California law.

I love LA.

You know when we first started
spending time together,

I was so nervous.

You were so accomplished,

and I couldn't imagine
what you saw in me,

or what you could need
that I could give you.

And I look at your talent,

and my mind reels
with possibility.

All the things we can
accomplish together.

When I look at you,
I see the future.

Jane, I need everything
you have to offer.

This is really special,
isn't it?

Something I've been
searching for all my life.

God, you're beautiful.

It's getting late.

I better head home.

Smitty, there's
a body out there,

about 25 yards, port B.

This is the Coast Guard.

Wave if you can hear me.

I'll throw you out a life ring.

Line in the water!

Palmer had to have
taken Jake by force.

It's the only thing that makes
any sense

I mean, he could never
have bought Jake.

No wonder Amanda's
the way she is.

Survival instinct
always at work.

Get them before they get you.

Never trust anyone.

I don't know. I think she
trusted Jake.

As much as she could
trust anyone.

I just keep thinking...

you never know what you
got until it's gone.

I should've insisted that Jake go on
that fishing trip with me last month.

Guys, it's two a.m. We should
probably get some sleep.

Jake!

I was so worried. We didn't
know what happened. Jo.

I promise I'll fill you all
in on the gory details later.

Is Amanda home?

Yeah. She's upstairs.

I'll catch you guys.

Jake.

Oh, my God.

Are you all right?

I'm fine now. I thought
I was gonna die out there.

You don't know what the last few
days have been like for me.

Amanda, I want you to sit down.

I need to talk to you.

It's okay, Jake. Forget it.
I already know.

So where is he,

Mexico, Honduras, West Indies?

Amanda...

I mean, if he paid you off,

I know you had your reasons.
You don't have to tell me.

Your father ambushed me.

He had a gun.

I didn't have a choice.

Okay, so what happened next? He
rigged another boat to explode

and took off with yours?

Your father's dead, Amanda.

Brittany, the girl you saw
on my boat, shot him.

She was in on it with your father.
It was all a set-up.

Your father set her up with me,

and she double-crossed him.

The plan was to rendezvous my
boat with her Boston whaler,

transfer the money,

and then blow up "The Pretty
Lady" with me on it.

I jumped overboard just in time.

Well...

there it is.

I'm sorry.

Michael's stalling, Sydney.

He's trying to sweet-talk you

so his legal dog-whippers can
come up with a better strategy.

We need to hire a lawyer.

Jane, I'm handling this
in my own way, okay?

No, it's not okay.

Michael has the instincts
of a criminal.

His specialty is making
things go his way.

We've got to hit him
with a preemptive strike.

Jane, I promised you that I'd get
you Michael's share of the business

and I'm going to.

I know you don't
like to think about this,

but I do know Michael as well,
if not better than you.

Sydney...

Jane, I've really been thinking
about this and I just feel like if

I can somehow repay you for
everything that you've done for me,

then I can start over
clean or something.

Okay. Then let's do it right.

I think you're kidding yourself
about Michael.

You give him an inch,
he'll take a kilometer.

He wants me out of his life more
than I want him out of mine.

He'll come around.

One more day,
and I'm hiring a lawyer.

I'll be in the studio around 11.

Okay.

Bye.

Bye.

Dr. Michael Mancini, please.

Mancini.

It's Sydney. I want an answer.

What is this, stump the doctor?
What's the question?

You know what it is, Michael. Are you
going to give me what I want or not?

Yes, Syd, I am.

I already have
the papers drawn up.

Just a couple of points
we need to talk about.

I want you to meet me,

neutral territory, just to
talk terms, you and me.

Now, why would I do that?

Because we need to get
this done and settled,

and you and I could always talk.

All right.

I'll meet you, Michael,
but just to talk terms.

Great.

The Chateau Deauville on Doheny.

Fine. 8 o'clock.

Well...

uh, two amps of
calcium gluconate,

and I think nine
is a better setup.

Fine. Nine o'clock.

And tell Kimberly I said hello.

I know how difficult
this is, Miss Woodward.

I wish that there
was some other way,

but we're fairly certain the
man we found is your father.

I understand.

I have to warn you, the condition
of the body is rather startling.

I appreciate the warning.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's my father.

Could I have a few
minutes alone, please?

Of course.

You all right?

I'll be waiting outside. Okay.

You know what it is?

I've lost my priority
status with Jake.

And I can't recalibrate it to
just friends mode.

It'd be hard for anyone.

Yeah, well right now, that's about as
comforting as "You still got your health."

I'm trying to be cool
about this.

It's just not working.

So? Cool isn't
in your repertoire.

I don't know if I'm
supposed to call him now

when something happens
in my life

or supposed to hold back
and use restraint.

Restraint's probably cool.

You have to talk to him.

Relationships
are like governments.

Every one has their own set of
rules and bylaws.

You guys just have to
figure out what yours are.

I don't believe it.

What?

Billy with the new
secretary from our office.

He should follow her
around with a towel,

the way she drools over him.

Excuse me.

You ever leave that seat?

Hi.

Hi. Hi.

Excuse me, could I talk to
you privately for a minute?

Okay. I'll be right back.

I'll get us some beers.

Thanks.

So...

What, are you dating her now?

That's not a question.
That's an accusation.

We're dating
other people, aren't we?

I guess so.

But with all the women in LA,

did you have to date
someone I work with?

I don't want to get
into this, all right?

I'm asking you as a favor,
Billy.

This is completely
unprofessional.

You think I started out
wanting to see other people?

The whole reason I wound up at D and D in the
first place is 'cause I was trying to help you.

You didn't want
to live in New York.

You wanted me back in LA.

And then you blew off every opportunity
to make our relationship work.

So I'm sorry if this
is upsetting you,

but if you're asking me
not to see Elisabeth,

the answer's no.

What do you see in her anyway?

She's you... two years ago.

Oh... God.

I feel like I could
sleep for a week.

Tell me about it.

Thanks for coming with me today.

It really meant a lot.

You okay?

Yeah.

Can I get you
something to drink?

You hungry? No, thanks.

I don't know what's worse...

Death or damnation.

I don't know how long my
father would've lasted in jail

or as a fugitive.

Maybe he really is better off.

Oh, Amanda.

Neither one of us is
thinking clearly right now.

I've just been through hell.

You have, too.

Doesn't mean I'm ready
to jump back into this.

Jake, don't do this now.
I need you.

I can't just turn it
off and turn it on.

My life is going down the tubes.

I just lost everything.

Jake, please.

What I need right now is to
be by myself for a while.

I'm not abandoning you.

That's what it feels like.

Well I'm not.

I'm glad you could make it.

Michael, neutral territories

do not have king-size beds
in the middle of them.

It's neutral till
the first shot's fired.

You can't do this to me.

I won't let you.

Have a seat, Syd.

Have a seat.

Michael.

You were right all along

about how I feel about you,

about Kimberly, about all of it.

I'm not staying with
Kimberly out of guilt.

I'm staying with her
because I'm afraid not to.

That woman is crazy.

She followed me to dinner the
other night and saw us together.

I think she tried to kill
me again this afternoon.

Syd,

if I don't prove
that I'm divorced,

I'm afraid she'd
not only hurt me,

she'd hurt you,

and I can't let that happen.

I need time to
get her to trust me,

then I'll either
get her transferred

or get her to want to leave me.

But we need her trust

to get rid of her, Syd.

You wanted truth.

There it is.

I don't know which one
of you is crazier.

Now, signing these papers

is our only way out,

the only way we could
be safe together.

Syd, please.

You're my soul mate,

the only woman who's
ever understood me.

Help me.

Help me. Sign the papers.

It's our only way
to be together later.

Do it for us.

Please, Syd.

For us.

Oh, thanks, babe.

I appreciate it.

You just relinquished
all rights.

I love LA, too.

How could you do this to me?

I've taken the fall for you.

I've given you everything I had.

Right, and expected
nothing in return.

You never loved me?

Here's your five grand.

Taking money for not having sex.

New low, don't you think?

I'll make you suffer
for this, Michael.

I swear I'll make you suffer.

I've contacted a lawyer.

We have an appointment
this afternoon.

Just tell me that you didn't wind up
giving him my share of the business, too.

You want to know what happened?

It's really unbelievable, Jane.

He was putty in my hands.

He agreed to everything.

He's calling
his lawyer this morning,

and his lawyer's calling
me this afternoon.

Syd, now I swear,
if you're lying...

I'm not lying, Jane.

You said that a deal's not
a deal until it's signed.

And that's the only reason I
hesitated saying anything.

So he agreed to everything?

Yes!

Good for you.

You do know him
better than I do.

I guess he just wanted me out
of his life badly enough.

Well, congratulations
to the both of us.

Yeah, it's really great.

I'm going to cancel this
appointment with the law firm.

You better have this
under control.

Hi. Good morning.

I came by to see if you needed
anything, if you were okay.

I'm fine. Thank you.

How are you feeling?

Good, good.

Do you have a minute?

Sure. What's up?

The other night
when you came back,

and you barely said two words to
me before you went up to Amanda's,

I guess it hurt my feelings.

Your feelings?

I come back from being trashed
at gunpoint and almost killed,

and all you can think about

is how I didn't make enough small talk
with you before I went up to Amanda's?

Is that really
the important issue here?

Yes, it is, okay, Jake?

It's about priorities
and commitment,

consistency, communication,

all those "C" words that go out
the window when it comes to me.

I've really had it with the petty
garbage around here. All of you.

You just keep rehashing. You sling
it from one apartment to the next.

You know, self-absorption is a
bottomless pit in this place.

You cold son of a bitch.

You are surrounded by people
who care about you.

Yeah, after they
care about number one.

All this support, Jo,

it's turning me into a stone.

I have tried my entire life
to do right by people,

and no matter how hard I try,

it keeps getting
turned around on me.

I think Amanda's got
the right idea.

You don't help anybody,
don't take any help.

You're kidding yourself, Jake.

You know, I used to
think that I was the one

that had a problem
with commitment,

believing that things could
be as they seem to be.

But it's not me, it's you.

And you're so full of self-pity

that you can't even see
what's around you.

And don't expect me to be here the next
time one of your businesses blows up.

I've had it with you, with
relationships, with this whole city. Go!

Fine. Have a nice life.

Good morning, Jane.

What do you want, Michael?

Nice greeting.

Yes, it is,
all things considered.

I've been going over
this month's books.

You creative types really
do live in dreamland,

unless, of course, you're manufacturing
fabric out of solid gold.

Why would you care what I'm doing,
Michael, if you're out of the business?

Why would I be out of the
business when

I just bought Sydney off
for five grand.

I supposed you have
documents to prove that.

You didn't tell 'em,
did you, Syd?

You know, families really shouldn't
keep secrets from each other.

Now, this business
is a real moneymaker.

Rate we're going, I'll be able
to purchase that beach house

in a matter of months.

I tried, Jane. I'm really...

Stop it.

Syd, I am so tired of
getting stabbed in the back

and hearing you're sorry.

Some things
never change, do they, Jane.

Get the hell
out of here, Michael.

I believe you've made
your point, Doctor.

You're right. I've got patients to see.
Lots of 'em.

Nice try, Jane,

but you see, I'm growing to love
the fashion business.

See ya, Syd.

Thanks for everything.

Jane, I'm sorry.

I should've listened to you.

You knew
I could never win with him.

He's never gonna give up
the business, Jane.

He wants to be a part of your life
any way he can. Can't you see that?

Johnson-Larue is one of the
country's oldest companies.

They've been doing business the
same way for the past 50 years.

They incorporate everything in
Delaware for the tax benefits.

We're talking about the
Johnson-Larue account.

You should hear this.

Well, uh,

as I said,

David Larue told me
yesterday confidentially

that the chairman is getting
sentimental in his old age.

And he wants to focus on
the humanitarian aspect.

Mm, important little tidbit.

Could you pull
the Larue personnel file?

Sure.

You are amazing.

What?

What did I do?

Do you know
how inappropriate it is

to include Elisabeth on
our strategy discussions?

She's our assistant, not a peer.

Yeah, not yet.

I mean, she's sharp.
She's got great ideas.

The more she knows,

the more efficient we'll be.

What does this really mean,

that you two are an item now?

I'm not going to discuss
this with you.

Fine.

I just, I want you to know that
somebody from the office

asked me out,

and I'm probably going to go.

Okay. As long as we're
up front about everything,

there's one more thing. Okay.

Elisabeth saw this picture
of you and me on your desk,

and it makes her uncomfortable,

so I'd appreciate it
if you'd take it down.

No problem.

I'll go start that copy.

Jake, hey, this is a surprise.

I've been actually meaning
to come by

and see you. See if you're okay.
See how you're doing.

How you feeling?

I'm fine. A little sore, but, you know,
overall, everything seems to be working.

You want to come in?

No. Thanks. I was wonder if
you could you do me a favor?

Sure.

These are the keys
to my apartment.

If you could give those to
Amanda, I'd appreciate it.

And just tell her to keep the
security deposit.

Sure, of course.

Where you going?

I don't know.

But, you know, when your luck's bad,
they say there's two things you can do.

You can either change your name
or you can change your life.

Take care of yourself, man.

See ya, Jake.