Major Crimes (2012–2018): Season 2, Episode 4 - I, Witness - full transcript

All right.

We're here, Lloyd.

Thank God.
This jet lag is killing me.

Yeah, the flight from Phoenix
to L.A. can be exhausting.

Tell me about it.

[ Car alarm chirps,
door closes ]

Airline pretzel?

Tastes even better
on the ground.

Too much sodium.

You sure?
'Cause I took like 30 bags

when the flight attendant
wasn't watching.



[ Door opens ]

Wow.

You guys really went all out.

Hey, Lloyd,
this is what's available

in the part of town
you wanted to be in.

If it's not up to
your usual standards,

maybe we can get the D.A.
To revoke your deal.

Yeah, and then instead of
testifying tomorrow,

you can spend the next 20 years
in a state facility.

No, I'm not complaining, guys.
You've both been awesome.

First time I've ridden
in a police car

without my hands cuffed
behind my back.

[ Chuckles ]

Well, as a witness, your safety
is very important to us,



so here's a cellphone to be used
for emergencies only.

[ Cellphone ringing ] Oh.

- Hello?
- Hello?

- Hello?
- Hello?

It's me, you idiot.

Listen, that phone has
our numbers in it, okay?

You don't make any other calls,

you don't leave this room,
and you don't open the door.

Now, we'll be back by 8:00 A.M.
to pick you up.

[ Chuckles ]

Cretin.

[ Grumbles ]

[ Door closes ]

Hey, what's up with you?

What do you mean?

Well, first,
there's your power walking

and then giving up caffeine...
[ Sighs ]

going on cleanses.

Why?

Come on, what gives?

All right, look,
four weeks back, I fainted.

Fainted? Why?

I was at my ex-wife's house,
sharing my reasonable opinions

about all the money
Nicole's wedding is costing.

[ Stammers ] I-I didn't know your
daughter was getting married.

Well, congrats.

Yeah, thanks.

All right, anyway, one minute,
I'm arguing with my ex-wife,

and the next minute,
I wake up in an ambulance

with some guy asking me
who the president is.

Oh, and by the way,

unless you want
the full work-up,

don't say Jimmy Carter.

[ Car door closes ]

And you fainted because...?
Nothing.

All right. High blood pressure.

The doctor wants to put me
on this pill,

but the side effects
could make me irritable, moody,

quick to anger.

Who could know the difference?

[ Engine turns over ]

Look, I'm not gonna take
the pill, okay?

I'm gonna do it naturally
by eating less salt,

taking deep breaths,
staying hydrated,

losing weight,
getting more sleep...

Eliminating caffeine,
meditating,

walking an extra 2 miles a day,

switching to
a mediterranean diet.

[ Sirens wailing ]
For God's sake, Flynn,

I take 20 pills a day
with three glasses of wine.

And look how healthyam.

Just go on the drug.

I don't want to.

All I need is less stress,

and my daughter and my crazy
ex-wife aren't helping.

[ Wailing continues ]

It's a pressure point, okay?

It gives you
instant relaxation.

You should try it.

Oh, and listen, if people
should find out that I fainted,

I could be put on desk duty.

So do me a favor...

don't mention my blood pressure
to anyone.

Sure, sure, and look, Flynn,

whatever I can do to lower
your stress, count on me.

[ Wailing continues ]
Yeah, fine.

Thanks.

Dorsey: You are surrounded!
Come out with your hands up!

I repeat,
come out with your hands up!

- Excuse us, please,
- Dorsey: You are surrounded!

Excuse me. Oh, my God.

[ Wailing continues ]

We don't want to shoot
if we don't have to!

Oh, my God.

You think this has
anything to do with Lloyd?!

Take it easy.
Just take it easy, Flynn.

We're early.

We have plenty of time
to fix this.

You have one minute!

I'm not saying this again!
Come out with your hands up!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

What's going on?

Murder suspect
isn't responding.

What murder? Where?

Convenience store about a mile
from here was robbed last night.

Owner was gunned down
in cold blood.

[ Chuckling ]
It wasn't the guy in room 5.

Yeah.
That's our suspect... room 5.

But he won't answer
the phone in his room,

so we're gonna knock
on his door...

really hard.

Look, your so-called suspect

is testifying
in a big murder trial today,

so just have your people
stand down

while we straighten this out.

- One minute.
- You got 30 seconds.

Uh, what are you looking
at me for?!

Call him on the cell
you bought him!

Oh, uh, what's the number?

You didn't write it down?!

Well, yeah, I wrote it down.

I, uh... yeah.

Yeah, I've got it somewhere.

You know what? I-I dialed it.

I have it on my phone.

All right, put your speaker...

[ Cellphone ringing ]

Lloyd: Oh, where... where...
oh, okay, there it is.

[ Beep ] Oh, man.

What you want?

Lloyd, it's Lieutenant Flynn.

Did you kill somebody?!

[ Slurring ]
No! Why would I kill anyone?

Are you drunk?!

No!

No, I ran out of beer
like two hours ago.

Lloyd, listen to me.

You come out of that room
with your hands in the air now!

[ Woman screams ]

Oh, God! Oh, oh!

[ Car alarm blaring ]

Man: Go!

[ Coughing ]

Oh, oh, God!

Oh, crap!

Man: Freeze!

- Man: Come on!
- Police... freeze!

Get him up, get him up!
Let me see your hands!

Show me your hands!
Get them up! Come on!

Lloyd: Easy, easy, easy!

Flynn, don't worry.

There's a perfectly good
explanation for all that cash.

[ Coughing ]

And the gun, too.

Oh, hey, guys.

Oh, God.

Female dispatcher:
911... what's your emergency?

Woman: [ Hispanic accent ]
It's terrible!

You must send help!

Ma'am, calm down.
Where are you?

A pay phone
at Western and "Hefferson."

I just see a tall man
in a green hoodie

shoot another man!

Dios mío, I think he is dead!

Officer lang, when you
responded to this call,

did you apprehend a tall man
in a green hoodie? Yes, I did.

And do you see that man
in the courtroom today?

Yes, the defendant,
Scott Perry.

Thank you very much, officer.
No further questions.

Mr. Dillard, your witness.

Dillard: Officer, when you
arrested my client,

- did he have a gun on him?
- Lang: No.

In fact, you never found
the murder weapon.

So what made you so certain
you had captured the shooter?

The description of the caller
was very accurate.

A woman trying to conceal
her own identity

with a fake Mexican accent...

a woman you never located
or identified.

Another eyewitness also I.D.'d
the defendant as the shooter.

You're referring to
Lloyd Gibbs,

an admitted felon who was
offered immunity to testify...

a man who had every reason
to lie to...

objection.

Mr. Dillard may challenge
the credibility of Mr. Gibbs

when he takes the stand.
Sustained.

Any other questions, counselor?
No, your honor.

Officer Lang,
you may step down.

Ms. Rios?

Ms. Rios?

Your next witness?

Your honor,
may we break now for lunch

so as not to interrupt
Mr. Gibbs' testimony?

Okay.

Ladies and gentlemen
of the jury,

we will recess
for exactly one hour.

What is going on?
Where's Lloyd?

Under arrest.

Under arrest?! For what?!

Well, a few things...

fleeing the scene of a crime,
armed robbery...

Resisting arrest, and one count
of first-degree murder.

So, after you dropped off
her witness at his hotel room,

he killed somebody?

Well, if you just want to take
S.W.A.T.'s word for it, yes.

How could you two
let this happen?

How could we? We were doing you a favor!
This is not even our case!

I mean, look, we were told to
pick the creep up at the airport,

drop him off,
and that's what we did!

Captain, I have been preparing

the prosecution of Scott Perry
for two years.

Without this witness,

my chances of a conviction
are zero.

And who exactly is Scott Perry?

[ Sighs ]

Three young men from Arizona...

Scott Perry, Dennis Tucker,
and Lloyd Gibbs...

operated a local theft ring...

stealing moving vans
and fencing their contents.

They had a dispute over money.
Scott Perry shot Dennis Tucker.

His other friend, Lloyd Gibbs,
witnessed the murder

and agreed to testify.

Couldn't you have just made
a deal with Mr. Perry?

We believe Scott Perry
was paid to kill his friend

by someone more powerful,
most likely his fence,

and there's no deal
unless Perry gives the guy up.

I, um, I usually hang out
over here.

Kris: No one's ever taken me
to a police station before.

Wow.

It's just all so interesting.

Oh, Buzz,
this is my friend Kris.

Kris, this is Buzz.

You're Kris?
I thought you were...

I mean, it's so nice
to meet you.

You too.

What a cool place to study.
How many people work here?

About half.

Here's your math problems back.

I marked the ones
you might want to rethink.

Thanks.

You can sit here.

Sharon:
I understand your frustration,

but until we have orders
to the contrary,

L.A.P.D. Officers
are not required

to babysit your witnesses.

Emma: Unless they're cute,
little blond boys,

in which case, you adopt them?

Look, I can't put Lloyd Gibbs
on the stand

unless he's cleared
of this murder... immediately.

Lieutenant Tao
has just returned

with evidence from the crime
scene at the convenience store.

I will be out there momentarily
to examine it. Thank you.

Ah, ah.

Sit.

Captain...

We were never informed that
Lloyd Gibbs could be dangerous,

and he was unarmed
when we picked him up.

And you searched him
for weapons?

The dirtbag
was getting off a plane!

That's the TSA's job!

I'm almost certain
that this whole thing

is just one big
misunderstanding,

and we'll sort it out
in no time.

Tao: The evidence shows Lloyd Gibbs
robbed the convenience store

after shooting the owner
to death.

And what makes you
so sure of that?

The time line we put together.

Sykes: Louis Berg,
owner of easy time market.

At 1:16 A.M.... standing
in the middle of his store.

Mr. Berg was shot twice
in the chest.

As you can see,
his blood covers

about a 4-foot radius
on the floor.

Lloyd Gibbs' sneakers.

See the tread?

Gibbs walked through the blood
to the counter,

and then he tracked prints
to the door and beyond.

Is there any video
from inside the market?

There were cameras in the store,
but nothing was being recorded.

Aha!

So no incriminating footage
from the scene.

But we did catch some video
from an atm 20 yards away.

I've blown it up.

That's Lloyd Gibbs
jumping up and down in a puddle.

Trying, I think,
to get blood off his sneakers.

Buzz, can you freeze-frame?

Thanks.

Underneath his right arm...
two six-packs of beer.

Underneath his left arm...

a bag stamped
"easy time market."

Other security cameras captured
his run back to the motel,

culminating at 3:10 A.M.

With this video of Gibbs

staggering through
the parking lot

towards his room.

Oh, my God.

Tao: This footage is consistent

with all the 911 calls
from various people

reporting someone matching our suspect's
description returning to the motel.

Emma: I've got 15 minutes
to get to court

and persuade the judge
that Lloyd Gibbs

is a credible witness
being unfairly detained.

Anybody care
to come back me up?

I will.

This evidence
is total bullshit.

Emma: Thank you.

Nice to know I have
at least one friend here,

Detective Lopez.

[ Chuckles ]

Oh, that's so sad.

I know...
the poor shopkeeper's family.

No, I mean that
Detective Sanchez has a crush

on that horrible Emma lady,

and she doesn't
even know his name.

Uh-huh. Thank you.

That was ballistics.

The .45 found in Lloyd's room

not only matches the bullets
that killed Louis Berg...

it's also
the missing murder weapon

from dda Rios' trial.

I think her material witness

may end up becoming
her new defendant.

Emma: If I don't disclose
everything we know,

I'll be open to charges of misconduct.

Don't worry. I got your back.

Judge Richwood:
Let's call the court to order.

Your honor, one moment
before you bring in the jury.

I have a... A little emergency.

[ Sighs ]
Will counsel please approach?

Detective Lopez.

All right,
what's the problem, Ms. Rios?

Because of threats to the life
of the people's witness,

the L.A.P.D. Has taken
Lloyd Gibbs

into protective custody, sir.

He's temporarily unavailable
to testify.

I'm sorry. You are?

Detective Julio Sanchez.
Major crimes.

DDA Rios insisted that Mr. Gibbs
be allowed to appear,

but in our opinion,
it's not safe.

Your honor, I find
this explanation ridiculous.

Your honor, Mr. Gibbs
is being held by the police.

And he is being protected.

Dillard: Your honor, 10 minutes
ago, I heard a news report

that a man
sounding like Lloyd Gibbs

was arrested for murder

tragically similar to the one

my client is on trial for
at this very moment.

Your honor, the L.A.P.D.
Is not run by reporters,

and our concerns about Mr. Gibbs
are legitimate.

[ Inhales deeply ] Ms. Rios...

Look, I don't mind
an afternoon off

or a late morning tomorrow,

but the jury can't stay here
indefinitely.

I'll grant
a 24-hour continuance,

at which time trial will resume

with your witness or without.

Is that clear?

Yes, your honor. Thank you.

Wow, you completely
misrepresented what's going on.

It's too soon to say.

Maybe Lloyd
wasn't even in that store.

Hell yeah, I was in the store.

But you didn't rob the place?

Uh, did I rob it? Um...

Well, why do you even need
to think about it?

Either you robbed the place
or you didn't.

I-it's not a simple
yes-or-no answer.

Okay, the cashier
was lying on the floor, dead.

I mean [Laughs]
what was I gonna do...

throw a 20 on him and say,
"here you go, dead guy"?

"That's for the beer.
Keep the change."

Had you ever seen
the shopkeeper before?

I don't think so.

I mean, does this look like
anyone you know?

Oh, very funny, Lloyd.

We're asking you
serious questions here.

Well, and I'm giving you
serious answers.

[ Stammers ] As far as I know,

I'd never seen the guy before,
and even if I had,

I definitely
would not have recognized him

given the way he looked then.

And by that, I mean given
that he was dead.

Sykes: Great news, captain.

Turns out Louis Berg,
our dead shopkeeper,

was a total sleazebag.

A lot of people
could've wanted him dead.

Really? No question.
And that market...

it was mostly a front
for his gambling operation.

Louis Berg was a bookie.

Which explains why the cameras
weren't recording.

Detective Sykes,
see if you can make a list

of Mr. Berg's
gambling clientele.

Thank you.

[ Clears throat ]
Uh, all right.

Provenza:
All right, Lloyd, look at me.

Now listen.

Do you understand
that you could go to prison

for the rest of your life?

Okay, how dumb
do you guys think I am?

No one gets life in prison
for stealing beer.

Not even really good beer.

For murder, Lloyd!
You'll go to prison for murder!

In 30 years, I've never seen
a better case against anybody.

Flynn: You know what?
The hell with it.

I'm gonna arrest him now.

Okay, w-wait! Look.

[ Sighs ]

A friend was with me
last night.

I told you not to call anybody!

It wasn't just anybody!

This is the most amazing woman
in the world.

I've known her
since we were kids.

We've dated off and on
since high school,

and you can believe her

when she says
I didn't kill anyone

because she is honest,
dependable,

and absolutely
not a prostitute.

"Not a prostitute."

What is her name?

Her name is "Shampagne."

With an "s."

And she has a website.

[ Sighs ]

In the entire history of crime,

there has never been a reliable
alibi witness named Shampagne.

I am so sorry.

I would have introduced myself
sooner,

but it's been so busy here.

You must be kris.

Sharon, kris.

This is my own personal
police captain.

Kris: Oh, well,
it's so nice to meet you.

Thanks for letting me come
and watch today.

I was just telling kris
that this is an easy one

because you guys
already caught the murderer.

Lloyd: No, they didn't!

I didn't kill anyone!

Um...

I hope your parents
don't mind you being here.

Oh, no. My parents
don't care where I am.

Really?

Uh, that's how much
they trust her.

Captain, we found
the alibi witness.

Excuse me.

Shampagneintheglassxxx. Com.

The three x's
make it classy, ma'am.

Sykes:
Says here she's an animal lover,

aspiring spokes model,

and professional
conversationalist.

Hi. I'm Shampagne.

Are you dying for some
stimulaticonversation?

Then let's get together for
a sexy one-on-one discussion.

Shampagne puts the "par-tay"
in repartée.

Lloyd: That's Shampagne,
and she is not a prostitute!

Somebody please shut that door!

Thank you!

Please shower
before our conversation.

"One hour of discussion...
$800."

Lieutenant, check on
her online calendar

and see when she's next
available for a good talking-to

by Lieutenants
Flynn and Provenza.

Ah.

Uh, she has time at 4:00 P.M.

Type in, uh, Andrew Flynn.

Uh, what,
are you out of your mind?

Don't use my name.

We'll call you Lance fontaine.

Oh, yeah.

Tao: I'll set up a dummy
e-mail address for you.

Emma: 4:00 P.M.?

We're never gonna settle this
by tomorrow afternoon.

You want some cheese
with that whine?

Come on, let's go have
a three-way repartée.

[ Car door closes ]

This is the house
of conversation?

Yeah, we're five minutes early.

Marc: I only wish every girl

followed directions
the way you do.

[ Shampagne giggles ]

You are amazing, Shampagne.

[ Clears throat ]

[ Clears throat ]

Hey, hey, hey, what's this...
the early-bird special?

Hey, Shampagne, double time
and hazard pay coming at you.

Hey, buddy,
you want to see hazard pay?

Yeah, you better run,
you idiot!

Hey, hey, hey,
just let it go, huh?

Come on, come on.

Shampagne!

Hello?

Shampagne: Have a seat, Lance.
Be right there.

[ Whistles ]

Oh.

I wasn't expecting two of you.

[ Giggles ] Not a problem...

though as long as you know
it's twice the price.

Also, I have to charge
for the time it takes

for any medication to kick in.

So if you haven't
already swallowed your pills,

then you should go...
I don't need a pill.

I could still talk to you
like a teenager.

If you say so. [ Chuckles ]

Now, before anything else,

you have to swear
that you are not police,

or else this is enchantment.

Enchantment?

This pains me
more than you could ever know.

Ooh, badges.

[ Sighs ] Did you
bring handcuffs, too?

Wait, you're not role-playing.

You're real police?

This is so irritating!

All I do is, you know, talk...
For money.

Well, that's all
we're here to do is... Talk.

A guy named Lloyd Gibbs

says that you were with him
last night.

Lloyd Gibbs, Lloyd Gibbs...

sorry, I don't know anyone
by that name.

Oh, well,
these are some pictures

from your high-school yearbook
back in lake havasu

when you went by the name
Carla Owens.

And Lloyd was, uh,
a fellow senior with you

in a class of 15 people.

Oh, that Lloyd Gibbs.
[ Giggles ]

Yes, I've known him
since we were 5 years old,

which is why I really don't want
to tell you about last night...

U-unless I have to.
Do I have to?

I'd say it's
in your best interest.

Okay, fine.

I'm cracking
under the pressure.

Lloyd is the sweetest guy

who has always had
the biggest crush on me.

One time in the 10th grade,
I was dating Kyle Malone,

and Lloyd shows up to my house
with a big bouquet of flowers.

Last night. Just
concentrate on last night.

Oh, uh, Lloyd texted
and said he was in town,

and did I want to come over?

Only when I got there,
he didn't have any beer.

I had no idea
he'd be so unready to entertain,

so I drove him
to the nearby market

and waited outside
while he went in,

and, uh...

There were gunshots.

So, you just left him there?

I texted to see
if he was all right,

but he didn't respond.

Oh, no, is he okay?

Oh, he's about 30 seconds
from being charged with murder,

but other than that,
yeah, he's great.

Will you give him my best?

Oh, and tell him that I've got

the "free mustache rides"
sweat shirt

that he left in my car.

You know what?
I've got a better idea.

Why don't you come with us,

and you can tell him yourself?

You almost ready?

Sorry, just one minute.

[ Sharon sighs ]

What are your plans later on?

Oh, well, I thought
maybe kris and I

could study together again.

Two days in a row, huh?

Yeah, yeah,
it's really, really helpful.

Um, I mean, she's the only
other person in my class

who hasn't taken
the s.A.T.S already.

Why? Is it a problem
having her come?

Oh, no, not at all.

I just wish I knew
a little more about her.

Like what?

Well, like, you are taking
your s.A.T.S,

and you're in summer school
to catch up with your year.

Why is she there?

Well, first off, you know
how hard it is to kick heroin.

Rehab takes
like 30 days at least.

Ha ha.

Kris' dad is some kind of
international attorney,

and they move around a lot,
Sharon.

Do you need to know
absolutely everything?

Well...

Yes...

Actually.

Tao: No luck yet
getting into her cell.

However, I was able to pull
the hard drive

from Shampagne's laptop,

but the only thing
her calendar's given me

is this long list of Johns.

What have we learned about
our victim's gambling clientele?

Sanchez: His books are encoded,

so we've only been able
to I.D. About two dozen

of the people who bet with him.

Their alibis
have checked out, ma'am.

Sykes: One thing
that might be important...

it appears Louis Berg recently
floated a $200,000 bet and won.

Somebody owed him
a substantial amount of money.

Do we have any idea
who this person is?

At this point, all we know
about the big loser

is his
encoded reference number...

0-1-6-0.

Emma: My continuance expires
in five hours.

What are the betting odds that
Lloyd Gibbs didn't kill Berg?

The only reason
why we haven't arrested him yet

is because of you.

Considering the circumstances,
did it ever dawn on you

that maybe you filed
against the wrong guy?

Sharon: Lieutenant Flynn,
Shampagne said

she communicated with Lloyd
by texts?

She probably
wouldn't talk to him

on the phone without charging.
[ Chuckles ]

I'd like to see
those text messages.

I've come up with a work-around
for the password on her phone.

What am I still doing here?

I'm missing all the clients who
depend on me for conversation.

Oh, don't worry...
I'm sure those guys are just...

Talking to themselves.

Meanwhile...

If there are some phone calls
you'd like to make...

My phone, finally.

Maybe I can cancel
some of these people

before they think
I stood them up.

[ Cellphone buzzes ]

[ Cellphone buzzes ]
What did you do?

It isn't working.
It won't take my password.

[ Cellphone buzzes ]
You people broke my phone!

Let me see if I can fix it.

It's made in China.

[ Door opens ]

8-4-6-2.

And we're in.

[ Door opens ]

Flynokay, Lloyd,
we've found Shampagne,

and she remembers
the night before last

a lot differently than you do.
How differently?

Well, she says
you killed the guy.

What?

No!

Really?

Lloyd, the God's honest truth.

Well, obviously, you've been
talking to the wrong Shampagne.

No, it's her, Lloyd,

and now would be a good time
for you to confess

and save us all
a hell of a lot of trouble.

Come on.

You killed your friend Dennis
two years ago,

and then the night before last,
you killed the store owner,

maybe because you owed him
a gambling debt

and maybe, just maybe,

that's why you asked us

to put you up
in that part of town.

Come on, admit it! Admit it!

This is them... Shampagne's
texts from two nights ago.

Well, here's one at 10:00 P.M.
directing her to get Lloyd

to Berg's easy time market
at 1:20 A.M.

Just after
Berg was gonna be shot.

The last four digits on the cell
that's texting Shampagne...

0-1-6-0.

Isn't that the number
of our shopkeeper's big loser?

Berg must've identified clients
by their phone number.

Mr. 0-1-6-0 must be one
of Shampagne's clients, too.

It's probably
from a burner, captain.

Let me see
if I can track it down.

Thank you.
...A rock and a hard place...

Which could be another rock...
So, Shampagne conspires

with Mr. 0-1-6-0,
whoever he is,

to kill Berg
and pin it on Lloyd.

Sykes: I don't understand.

If this was all about
keeping Lloyd off the stand,

why not just kill him
instead of the shopkeeper?

That's a good question.

Lloyd... L-let me finish!

Did Lloyd testify already?

At the preliminary hearing.

There it is.

If Lloyd was murdered,

his prior statement
could still be read

into the record.

Oh, you're right.

The only way
to get his testimony

out of my trial completely

would be to discredit him
so thoroughly,

the judge would disallow it.

Okay, I see why Lloyd
might have been framed.

Lloyd: Where was I?

Provenza: Lloyd, look at me.

Now, listen.

Lloyd: No, no! Now it's time
to fill out the picture.

I am losing my patience, Lloyd,
and I run out of patience,

you lose the deal you had
with the d.A.

[ Door opens ]

- Provenza: Well...
- Oh. Wow.

Looks like the "we're
just studying together"

aspect of things
has shifted rather abruptly.

You heading to
a red carpet somewhere, or...?

Ha, no.

Uh, my parents
are picking me up tonight

and dragging me to this
political fundraiser.

And my mom
bought all of this, okay?

This is not
how I would dress... ever.

Sometimes she treats me
like a doll.

You definitely
don't need lip gloss to study.

You do if you're studying
with me.

[ Door opens ]

Have we reunited Lloyd
and Shampagne yet?

No, I'm still waiting on the
sign for the door to be ready.

It was like a 6.

What is this?

Seriously, that's like a 4.

Well, interview room 1
was empty,

and you know kids...

always managing to find
a secluded space.

And you're eavesdropping
on them?

Hey, this was not my idea.

Unattended minors
can get into trouble,

and I think you'd be interested
in the girl

that your foster son
is about to ask out on a date.

Oh, he's not going to do that.

I bet...

One month of absolute civility
that he will.

But if you lose,

I get your office for 30 days,
no questions asked. Iconoclast.

You're on. Someone who attacks
commonly held beliefs.

Correct again.

You know, you don't need to be
studying vocabulary, do you?

I mean, why am I here?

Really?

Okay, um...

You know those good deeds
we're supposed to be doing...

like charity work,
extracurricular...

so we can put it down
on our college applications?

Uh-huh. Well, right now,

you are, uh,
tutoring a foster child.

Okay, come on.

Check off a box next to
"aid to the disadvantaged."

All right.

But then what are you
getting out of this

for your college application?

Okay, uh, look, you...
you cannot tell

anyone in school
about this, okay?

But do you remember
that horrible lady

I introduced you to
yesterday... that Emma?

Well, she is
a deputy district attorney,

and she wants to put me in
the Witness Protection program.

What?

And so the more
I could show her

that I have, uh,
personal relationships,

the harder...
Witness Protection?

Why?

Well, uh, believe it or not,

I've had threats
against my life...

threats that could let Emma
send me away,

and I'd lose Sharon. I'd lose my
house, my friends, everything.

Did he say "threats,"
as in plural?

Acceptable
teenage exaggeration.

The word "threats"
makes him seem more vulnerable,

more courageous.

Trust me on this, kris.

I know some things
about negotiation.

And this is definitely
a good deal for both of us.

And, really, what's the worst
that can happen?

I mean,
we both learn something.

And we get to... get to know
each other better...

Maybe.

Oh, we're getting close now.

That's the worst
that could happen.

[ Door opens ] Yes.

The sign you asked for
is ready.

Can we get this over with?

Geez, just when things
were finally going somewhere.

"vampire diaries" was
The Nadir of Shannon's day.

Acerbic.

[ Door closes ] Uh, bitter.

Your tone is often acerbic.

He did say "threats."
Your tone is acerbic.

No, my tone is mellifluous.
He did.

[ Elevator Bell dings ]

[ Police radio chatter ]

It's your choice, Shampagne.

We won't pursue prostitution
charges if you cooperate.

And you do care about Lloyd.

Off and on.

Then persuade him
to tell the truth.

Otherwise, he could go away
for a very long time.

Julio, "privacy" sign.

[ Sighs ]

It's the official one, sir.
Don't lose it.

Oh, good, you brought
the "privacy" sign.

Now, Shampagne, when you
go inside and I close the door,

you and Lloyd are gonna have
complete privacy.

Hey, there, cutie.
Happy to see me?

Yes and no, Shampagne.
Yes and no.

To be honest,
I'm a little upset with you.

Really? Why? I don't know.

Maybe because you told
the police I killed someone,

when I didn't, even.

I had to say that, Lloyd.

Why? Because Marc told you to?

Marc? Who's Marc?

Check Shampagne's cellphone
for contacts named Marc.

Sure.

Don't get upset about this.

All you have to do
is tell the police

that you killed that cashier
for right now.

Marc has a plan where
you get off in a few months.

Trust me, please.

I'm so tired
of hearing about Marc!

Maybe I should ask Dennis
what he thinks about Marc.

Oh, no, wait, I can't
because Dennis is dead

because Marc wanted that
to happen, too.

Marc, Marc, Marc, Marc, Marc.

Lloyd, that cashier
was really a bookie.

And he also wanted Marc to pay
thousands of dollars on a bet

that Marc never should've lost
in the first place.

Everybody knows that the giants
were supposed to beat the cubs.

What do you know
about baseball?

Lloyd, I'm a conversationalist.

I need to be able to hold up
my end of the discussion.

I love the way you hold up
your end, Shampagne.

Then you can't testify
against Scotty.

He'll go free, and they can
never try him again.

[ Sighs ] And then in a week,

the dumb police will realize

that you couldn't have killed
that shopkeeper,

and you go free, too.

[ Sighs ] I don't know.

I'd do anything for you,
I would,

but saying I killed someone
when I didn't

is kind of pushing it.

Don't you get it, Lloyd?

This isn't just about us.

This is about my whole career.

Tomorrow, I have an audition
Marc arranged for me

for "muy sabroso nachos."

Listen to this.

[ Hispanic accent ]
Dios mío, Luis!

You must try these nachos.

Muy sabroso!

How you say?

Delicious!

Wow.

For a minute, I thought you were
a real Mexican person.

[ Squeals ] You think?

Oh, my God.

That woman
is my unidentified 911 caller.

She is another witness
in my trial.

She saw the murder, too.

I've worked on I alard.

Marc practiced me
for two hours yesterday

just before
the police showed up.

That was Marc?

We let the dirtbag behind
all of this walk right by us?

So I guess Marc put the gun and
money in my motel room? Yes.

Mike, use Shampagne's cellphone
to send a text message to Marc.

I bet his phone number
ends with a 0-1-6-0.

And he killed two birds
with one bookie.

Request that Marc pick up
Shampagne here A.S.A.P.

Lieutenants Flynn and Provenza,
be downstairs to meet her.

Detective Sanchez, could you
do the honors with Shampagne?

I think Lloyd
is ready to confess.

Well, that's good.

You're under arrest.
Why? What for?

Conspiracy to commit murder.

Don't worry,
we'll work something out

so you just talk about it
like you did with Lloyd.

[ Elevator Bell dings ] That was
supposed to be a private conversation.

Yes, ma'am.

It'll stay between
you, me, the judge,

your lawyer, the D.A.,
and about 12 other people.

[ Sighs ]

I've been thinking about it.

And I guess I did
kill that shopkeeper.

Sorry, Lloyd, we just heard you
tell Shampagne otherwise.

What?

No, we were supposed to be
talking privately!

There's even that sign
on the door!

I know, Lloyd. I-I know,

but the police love to watch.

[ Sighs ] And how could
we pass up the chance

to see you go at it
with a professional...

Conversationalist?

You know what?

That is gross,

and you're all
a bunch of big, fat liars!

A felon and a prostitute
implicate a third person?

I see credibility issues.

I'm ready for trial.

That is your client's choice,
Mr. Dillard,

and he should know that not only
have we cleared up any issues

with Lloyd's testimony...

But Marc Vogel
is in police custody.

Ah.

There he is now.

I'm not saying anything,
and I want my lawyer.

Just shut up
and just stand right here

with Lieutenant Flynn.

Don't move so the other dirtbag
can see you.

Sharon: You do recognize Marc,
don't you, Mr. Perry?

He was the fence in your little
robbery operation.

He was also the man
who put you up to murdering

your friend, Dennis.
Isn't that right?

Emma: With his testimony,
we'll have everything we need

to send you away for life.

Or you can put Marc
in that position.

Entirely up to you.

In addition to Lloyd,
you should know

that Shampagne is uncorked

and ready to pour
her story out to your jury.

Is that what you want?

[ Cellphone ringing ]

I should've known all along
that Shampagne would talk.

Well, it is
what she's paid to do.

Flynn: Yeah, what do you want?

No, no, no, no, no.

I'll take the deal.

You made the right choice.

Good. I'll write up
your statement of facts.

You can sign it, and we'll
give it to judge Richwood.

And we'll all move on.
[ Sighs ]

Flynn:
Don't start with me, okay?!

Hey, listen,
if you expect me to pay 30 grand

of my hard-earned money
for this wedding,

I am walking her
down the aisle myself.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Her stepfather hasn't
contributed a dime, okay?

I'm gonna walk my little girl
to the altar alone.

Flynn, be careful... your blood pressure!
What? What the...

you just told the entire world
that I have high blood pressure.

Now everyone knows!

They didn't hear me.

Nobody heard me, did they?

I heard you!

You said,
"high blood pressure."

Explains a lot... I mean,
not everything, but a lot.

You see? What did I ask you?
Just take it easy.

Y-yank on your earlobe
or something.

Don't tell me
to take it easy, okay?

I asked you to do
one simple thing...

not tell anybody
about my blood pressure!

What do you do?! You tell the world!
It just slipped out!

Oh, really?! Really!

Really?! Really?! Really.

[ Thud ]

What's going on out there?

Julio!

Rusty: Okay, uh, just let me have it.
Shh. What'd I miss? Quiet.

Kris: Nice try. No.

Just think about it.

That Lieutenant Provenza guy,
he's avuncular.

[ Chuckles ]
Means irresistible.

[ Laughs ] Look it up.

It's means, like,
kindly, like an Uncle.

How's Lieutenant Flynn?

Well, falling down
knocked some sense into him.

He's starting the meds
he should've been on weeks ago.

Hey, so, um, I was wondering...
Also, I told him if he didn't,

I'd put it in his files
and chain him to a desk.

What is there to do in
Los Angeles over the weekend?

Oh, oh, oh. Look at this.

I mean, if this were
San Francisco or New York,

I'd have a better idea,

but... I don't know L.A.

Well, um...

Well, this is
kind of different, but,

um, there's a cemetery
in Hollywood

where a lot of old actors
are buried,

and during the summer,
they show movies there.

Uh, somebody took me there...

I mean,
I took somebody there once,

and it was... it was fun...

F-for a little while.

Well, is there a chance
that maybe we could go?

Uh, oh, oh, kris, look,

you may live in California,
but I live in a police state,

and I can't go anywhere right
now without an L.A.P.D. Escort.

Maybe they wouldn't
mind coming.

Well, it's expensive...
overtime costs.

But you know what? I-I can ask.

I mean, the worst thing
that can happen

is I could get a "no," right?

Right.

Right, okay.

All right, well, I'll ask.

[ Laughing ] Okay.

I'll be right back.

Captain, he's on his way out.

He's gonna be... oh.

[ Police radio chatter ]

Oh, hi.

Hey. Hey.

How's the studying going?

It's fine.

Um, I wanted
to ask you something.

Is this a bad time?

Oh, no, no, it's, um, perfect.

What?

W-well, this last case
you've been working on,

it's about discrediting
a material witness, right?

Yes.

Well, how'd that work out?

Uh, well, uh, in this case,

the legal system
had an alternative. Why?

I was just thinking about

how serious
my situation really is.

Oh, Rusty, you're fine.
Don't worry about it.

Is there, um...

Anything else that, uh,
you'd like to ask me.

No.

No, not right now. Uh...

Thanks.

Well, how'd it go?

What happened?

I'm not sure.

Rusthey.

So [Sighs] uh, this sucks,
but she said no.

Krioh, well. Sorry.

Y-you said no?

Just to keep me
out of your office?

Lieutenant, he never asked.

Safety first around here, so...

Well...

Maybe he's nervous.

I don't think so. Lucky for us we
still have a lot of vocabulary cards

to go through.
Right, that we do.

When my daughter
was Rusty's age,

she dated several boys
from her ballet school.

It didn't go so well.

Okay, let's try obfuscate.

Obfuscate.

[ Sighs ] To make something
incomprehensible.

Anyway, I feel a month
of civility coming my way.

Son of a...

ah.

I mean...

You're welcome.

[ Laughs ]

Correct again.

Mendacious.

Misleading or prone to lying.

Mm-hmm.

All right, uh,
the next word is pariah.

Pariah... an outcast.

His close friends
respected him,

but the rest of the world
viewed him as a pariah.