Mad Men (2007–2015): Season 4, Episode 7 - The Suitcase - full transcript

...Five, six, seven,

eight, nine, 10, 11.

That's two for the Campbells...

Where are these exactly?

It's a movie theater,
no bad seats...

the Cosgroves,

and Joey, Stan, Danny... $10 each.

How come we have to pay

when everyone knows damn
well they were free?

You're such a Jew.

Your friends in Hollywood
know you talk that way?



And let me tell you-
you're the Jew,

trying to make 30 bucks on
something you got for free.

25 on Clay by a knockout.

Liston is favored for a reason.

- Cassius Clay is scared.
- Of what, pray tell?

He had an elevated heart
rate before the last fight.

Who says that means you're scared?

It happens to me all the time.
It runs in my family.

Liston has the weight.
And he's never been knocked out.

Sonny's old.

He's experienced.

Don, I've got your ticket.

You want to put something down?

Stan's got a barber who makes book.



Yeah, who do you like?

I was just saying

I think Clay'd make
one hell of an adman.

You're right. Gimme 100 on Liston.

Joining us for a little
pre-fight steak and cocktails

at the palm?

Absolutely. Samsonite team,
in my office.

Listen, if it comes
up with Jennifer,

I did pay for the seats.

Can you make a dinner
reservation before the bout

for Mr. Sterling and me
anywhere but the palm?

I don't know why everyone
cares so much about it.

If I wanted to see
two negroes fight,

I'd throw a dollar
bill out my window.

I thought we were doing
this at 9:00. It's 11:15.

I'm late, but you're not.
Good work so far.

- Where do you want me?
- Behind the desk is fine.

You're in a white studio,
like in some limbo.

There's two no-name
football players holding

an American tourister and a skyway

going against Mr. Joe Namath

and his defender, a sexy girl

holding a samsonite,
and maybe a referee.

So we hear "hut hut,
hike!" Namath fades back.

"Oh no, it's a blitz!"...

punch in on Namath,
he says something like...

"The secret to victory
on the road is samsonite.

I carry it because it's tough

and no matter what comes at me,
I know I'm protected."

As they fall,

the competitors will bust open,
clothing flying out.

Touchdown, samsonite!

- "I've got it, honey."
- "You sure do, Joe."

"Samsonite... it's tough."

Endorsements are lazy,

and I don't like Joe Namath.

He hasn't even played in
a professional game yet.

He's very handsome.

And women don't buy suitcases.

Dr. faye says they do.

Could you leave us, please?

Peggy, I'm glad that this is an environment

where you feel free to fail.

You wanted to go with Danny's idea.

Because it works...

"only samsonite is tough."

It's the execution
that's the problem.

- Okay, should it be funny?
- Actually funny?

Maybe. Funny like
what I just saw? No.

- Hello.
- You remembered my birthday.

Did you open my present?

I am. Hold on.

My goodness.

I'm finally doing what I
should've done years ago.

Phillips-Olson- something probably,

but I'll need you.
I want to form an agency

that specializes in
women's products with you

as my creative director.

I don't know what to say.

But you're smiling, right?

I have some very-
sort of a little under the table,

but very high-level talks
with the people at tampax.

Peggy, it's tampax-
50% market share.

I mean they're really up there.

Plus that queer at belle jolie

has been barking up my tree.

Plus I have my
European connections.

It sounds exciting.

The train's leaving
the station, honey.

Get onboard.

Where am I calling you?

I'm in my office at home.

So you already told grey?

I'm not wasting my talents
over there anymore.

Believe me, it was mutual.

Duck, did you lose your job?

Peggy, this is good.

I'm not gonna lie.

I was a little inspired
by what Draper did.

Now I just need some accounts.

It's tough because, well...

it's tough to get a credit line.

So what do you have so far?

I know it's not a diamond necklace,

but I did spend some
money on those cards.

And I appreciate the gesture.

It's just...

I don't know whether
to take this seriously,

because I suspect
you've been drinking.

Well, you're wrong.

I heard about the Clios.

I have to see you tonight.

I have plans.

What, with that Mark?
He's another one.

Duck, you are a
valuable account man.

You have a bright future.

You just need to go to one
of those headhunters and...

- I need to see you, babe.
- Don't do that.

Peg, I'm falling apart.

Don't you know
you're the last thing

that made me feel
good about myself?

Pull your hands out
of your panties.

I can't talk right now....

I want to see you tonight.

You been farting in here?...

I have to go.

We're going to lunch.

I don't know if you could tell,
but he hated it.

I was hating it too
while we were doing it,

but not before. I'm not gonna lie.

So we're back to the drawing board.
Still gotta eat.

Come on, it's your birthday.

We'll let you talk through lunch.

You got a call

while you were in the
toilet to the direct line...

Stephanie from California,

no last name. She says it's urgent.

- Would you like me to place the call?
- No, I've got it.

Bad news. Our night is ruined.

I took care of that.

The kids are going to the palm.

We are going anywhere else.

Well, the brotherhood of
alcoholics anonymous...

Freddy and Cal
Rutledge from Pond's...

will be joining us for
dinner and the fight,

which means we'll have to

drink before dinner if
we want to drink at all.

And then there's all
the talk about drinking

where they start with
the funny stories

and they end up crying.

Again.

15 months I've been
waiting for this fight.

$300. Liston has to
lose by unconsciousness.

- Get rid of 'em.
- I can't.

- I should work on samsonite.
- That's in two weeks.

I'm gonna be in Florida.
Now this is your job too.

- Let's go.
- I'm sorry. You can do that without me.

- Samsonite you can't.
- Are you serious?

We can solve this
problem with a flask.

No, I wouldn't be
good company anyway.

That's never bothered me before.

I don't know what it is,

but I look at the side of your neck

and I wish I had one of
those James Bond pens

so I could jam a dart in it.

James Bond likes to travel.
He goes all over the world.

He goes underwater.
He met a girl underwater.

I think this is a
good place to stop.

See you tomorrow.

Oh, great.

I don't like sitting at my desk

and looking into a garbage dump.

Although I am paid less,
I am still not a janitor.

Thank you, gentlemen.

Doing something special
for your birthday?

Mark is taking me to dinner...

the forum of the twelve caesars.

- Ooh.
- Yes.

- How old are you?
- 26 today.

Well, you're doing all right,
aren't you?

Well, hello.

- Did I hear it's your birthday?
- It is.

- How are you feeling?
- Well, of course my days are

spent sleeping and
visiting the ladies' room,

although it's an incredible feeling

having this baby kick me.

Is it any different
than living with Pete?

You're witty.

I always assumed that,
but it turns out it's true.

Are you going to watch the fight?

Oh, yes. I've been watching boxing

since I was a little girl.

My father loves blood sport.

Mr. Draper's looking for you.

I'm sorry. I have to go.

Happy Birthday.

You know, 26 is still very young.

Have fun.

I want a rare steak
and I want to see

those two men pound each other.

Cynthia's at the restaurant.
We should go.

What about Jennifer?

Oh, don't go in there. Don't do it.

- She's dead.
- Let's beat it before it's us.

- I was just on my way out.
- Did you get California?

Do you want me to
try before I depart?

There's a time difference,
you know.

I do, but it goes the other way.

Good night, Mr. Draper.

Get in here.

Why don't you talk to
Joan and get rid of her?

No, Joan knew exactly what I needed

and made sure that I got it.

So where are we on samsonite?

We'll have something to
show you in the morning.

But the suspense is killing me.

Well, I kind of was on my way out.

Let me just see where we are.

I guess I've got a minute.

Okay. We thought that samsonite is

this very rare element,
this mythical substance,

the hardest on earth-
and we see an adventurer

leaping through a cave.

Is this a substance
much like bullshit?

I thought we could drop
one off the eiffel tower

with a countdown-
like the moonshot...

and show how it doesn't break.

- But it would, wouldn't it?
- Probably.

The government has prohibited us

from doing things like that, Peggy.

They feel that it is not
in the public interest.

We have a thing with samson,

because he's strong... and his hair.

I gave you more responsibility

and you didn't do anything?

That you like.
We did work... a lot.

I don't care if you work 10 seconds

if you bring me something I like.

We're going to do this right now.

Oh, I know you have plans.

You were going to call me
from a bar with an idea?

Do you think elves do this?

You're just gonna change it anyway.

Excuse me?!

- This is Mark Kerney.
- I am so sorry.

I got drawn into his web.
It's gonna be a while.

A while like soon,
or a while like I should cancel?

15 minutes? It shouldn't
take too long.

- He's going to the boxing match.
- He's going to Maine?

You can watch it on
closed-circuit TV

in the movie theaters.
We got tickets.

How come we didn't go?

Because we're having a romantic
dinner for my birthday.

Well, did you tell him that?

Look, I'm the only one who
can help him with this

and the sooner I get off the phone,

the sooner I can come.

Just hurry, will you?

She's gonna be a few minutes late.

A surprise on top of a surprise.

She works too hard.

"The oysters of Hercules,

which you with sword shall carve."

I saw a tray pass by.
They look like hockey pucks.

$1.65. You should
let Gerry get this.

Mom, don't cut the
kid off at the knees.

Now what if an
elephant either sits on

or steps on the suitcase?

How about a slow-moving
airplane runs it over?

Do you like Cassius Clay?

- He's very handsome.
- I don't think so.

You're not supposed to.

I remember my mother talking
about nat king Cole in a way

that made my father throw
out all his records.

He's got a big mouth.

"I'm the greatest."
" Not if you have to say it."

Muhammad Ali.

Do you like the airplane?

Liston just goes
about his business,

works methodically.

Clay will dance and talk,

throw a few until he's wiped out.

A bag under an airplane looks like

there's been an accident.

Three classes of suitcase...

featherweight, middleweight,
heavyweight...

for whatever class you're in.

But how do you do that on TV?

- What's the story?
- You don't like it?

No, I love it. That's great.
That's what we should do.

Let it ring.

I'll say you're not here.

Hello? Oh hello, Roger.

No, he's not here.

I answer other people's
phones all the time.

I'm going to count to three,
then I'm gonna start saying

a lot of words you don't like,
sweetheart.

- This should be good.
- I'm begging you...

Get down here right away.

You think I'd rather be working?

Yeah, I do. Did you know

Freddy Rumsen collects
Indian arrowheads?

Where are you?

There's a bar next to Keenes.

I've been sneaking off
to fortify myself.

Tell 'em you're sick. Go home.

I am sick. I think I overdid it.

And they're self-so-righteous.

I never pissed my pants.

This guy Rutledge killed
a man with a motorboat.

You know what gets you
over something like that?

Drinking.

Still got your ticket.

It's an attractive offer.

Look out your window.
Can you see me?

Good night, sweetheart.

Go ahead. I'll wait.

- Hello.
- 15 minutes? It's almost an hour.

I'm so sorry.
I'm gonna leave any minute.

Did you at least have something?

You have to get down here.

You have to get down
here right away.

I can't just leave, okay?

But you have to, okay?

You know what? Just go to my
apartment and wait for me.

We can eat there another time.

No, I don't want to do that.

- I'll make it worth your while.
- Damn it, Peggy.

I've got your whole family here

for a surprise dinner, okay?

And the only way you
can make it worse

is by not coming at all.

Oh, Mark.

I'm so sorry. I'm coming right now.

Thank you.

Well, so much for the surprise.

Okay, I'm going to leave if
that's all right with you.

I'm not so sure about it.

I mean every time we get into this,

we abandon the toughness idea.

Maybe there's something
to the elephant.

Do you want one?

I'm sorry. Do you
have someplace to be?

Maybe tap your foot
so I get the message.

I was supposed to be
at dinner an hour ago.

It's my birthday,
and I'm pretty sure

I ruined everything.

- Why the hell didn't you tell me?
- I don't know.

Because I thought this
would take a second.

So now I'm supposed
to feel like crap?

Oh, I'm so sick that I
ruined her birthday.

Do you know when my birthday is?

- I was your secretary!
- Well, enjoy your evening!

By the way, you are
20-something years old.

It's time to get over birthdays.

Go ahead. I'll do it myself.

Yes, I'm that important.

So the fact that
you're calling means

that you haven't left yet.

I'm not gonna be able
to make it at all.

- Are you kidding me?
- I'm sorry,

but no one asked you to do this.

You said you never had a surprise.

I can't believe you.

This is your mother speaking.

Hello, ma.

I just want you to know
that we're all here...

Me, Anita, Gerry, the roommate...

and we're not leaving
until you march in here.

I can't, okay? Could you
put Mark on the phone?

He's crestfallen, you know?

- Mrs. Olson, it's okay.
- It's not okay.

Now he's making excuses for you.

I don't know how many nice boys

you think are lining up for you.

You should be grateful.
Okay, goodbye.

- Hello?
- I'm sorry I ruined this

and I'm sorry you had
to spend the evening

with my mother.

You know what? She's right.

Really? Then why
don't you date her?

She's never even had a job.

How the hell are you mad at me?

Because you used my
birthday to get in good

with a bunch of people
who drive me crazy.

Should I have invited don?
You never stand him up.

What's the point of doing
anything nice for you?

Jesus. You even sound
like my mother.

I'm already into
this place for $40.

If you don't mind,
I'm going to enjoy my dinner

and you enjoy your work.

The fact that you
would stay there...

you know what?

- Forget it.
- No. What?

You want to do this right now?

- Do what?
- Fine.

It's been nice knowing you.
Happy Birthday.

- So that's it?
- Yup. Good night.

Hello?

It'll be fine.

Couples fight. Ask Gerry.

What's wrong? Elevator out?

I think I just broke up with Mark.

Oh. Really?...

I think so.

So go home.

Nope. I'm ready to work.

You win. Again.

You could've just told
me it was your birthday.

Right, and there'd
be no repercussions.

- So now this is my fault?
- Well, it's not my fault

you don't have a family,
friends or anywhere else to go.

Go. Go. Run to him
like in the movies.

- You don't have to be here.
- I do have to be here

because of some
stupid idea from Danny

who you had to hire
because you stole

his other stupid idea
because you were drunk.

Don't get personal because
you didn't do your work.

And by the way,
I know it kills you,

but guess what:
There is no "Danny's idea."

Everything that comes in
here belongs to the agency.

You mean you.

- As long as you still work here.
- Is that a threat?

Because I've already
taken somebody up

on one of those tonight.

- Relax.
- You know what?

Here's a blank piece of paper.

Why don't you turn
that into glo-coat?

Are you out of your mind?

You gave me 20 ideas

and I picked out one of them

that was a kernel that
became that commercial.

- So you remember.
- I do.

It was something about a cowboy.
Congratulations.

No, it was something about
a kid locked in a closet

because his mother
was making him wait

for the floor to dry,

which is basically
the whole commercial.

- It's a kernel.
- Which you changed just enough

- so that it was yours.
- I changed it into a commercial.

What, are we going to shoot him

in the dark in the closet?

That's the way it works.

There are no credits
on commercials.

- But you got the clio!
- It's your job!

I give you money,
you give me ideas.

And you never say thank you.

That's what the money is for!

You're young. You will
get your recognition.

And honestly,
it is absolutely ridiculous

to be two years into your
career and counting your ideas.

Everything to you
is an opportunity.

And you should be
thanking me every morning

when you wake up,

along with Jesus,
for giving you another day!

Oh, come on.

I'm sorry about your
boyfriend, okay?

May 25th. Ideas for samsonite.

Toughness means that......

Peggy, get in here.

- No.
- Come on.

You have to come in here right now.

What do you want?

You have to hear this. Sit down.

Come on. Sit.

So this is tape #4

of "Sterling's gold," by Roger Sterling.

So where was I?

Burt Cooper hated me
and I thought it was

because he thought I'd
be an ally of my father,

but it turned out it
was something to do

with my joie de vivre,

My romantic prowess...

See tape #3...

Including some time with
the queen of perversions,

his secretary Ida Blankenship.

You know what? Don't use her name.

But it was all about him
hating my very youth,

all because the poor
guy had been cut down

in the height of his sexual prime

by an unnecessary orchiectomy.

Lyle Evans, M.D.

I think he had him killed.

Anyway, sometime in
the summer of '48...

No, 1932...

No, 1939.

Why are you laughing?

It's like reading someone's diary.

Come on. Ida was a hellcat?

Cooper lost his balls?

Roger's writing a book?

I should go.

- Stay and visit.
- I've got nothing to say.

- Sure you do.
- No, it's personal.

We have personal conversations.

No, we don't, and I think
you like it that way.

I know I do.

Suit yourself.

We're supposed to be
staring at each other

over candlelight and
he invites my mother?

He doesn't know me.

It's not my fault.

I guess I'm back to square one.

Single.

Well, as Danny would say,

there's no use crying
over fish in the sea.

Mouse!

Over there!

- What are you doing?
- Get the suitcase.

- Why?
- I'm gonna seal it up in my nice samsonite

- and throw it off the roof.
- Don't.

Come on. Every idea you have
is some version of that.

Let's do it.
Where'd you go, Mickey?

- I think it's a rat.
- It's a mouse.

I grew up on a farm.

You know what?

There's a way out of this
room we don't know about.

Are you okay?

I think that's yours.

It's probably Mark.
I don't want to answer it.

It's still your birthday.

Let me get you dinner.

What's the most exciting
thing about a suitcase?

Going somewhere.

The acropolis.

I'd like to go to Greece.

I heard all the good
cooks stayed there.

I'd like to just go on a plane.
I've never been.

- Is that right?
- I've heard about it, obviously.

I've seen it in the movies.

It's an incredible idea... flying.

I remember on the way to Korea

they told us how many thousand
feet in the air we were.

There was some other kid there...

more of a yokel than me, even...

and he screamed,
"man wasn't meant to fly!"

Cooper has no testicles?

Ick. I don't want water.

My uncle Max said he had a suitcase

that was always packed.

He said, "a man has to be
ready to go at any moment."

Jesus. Maybe it's a metaphor.

There's something to that idea.

I don't know.

I can't tell the difference anymore

between something that's good
and something that's awful.

Well, they're very close.

But the best idea always wins

and you'll know it when you see it.

Keep banging your
head against the wall

then it happens.

And then it's done.

Yes, ma'am.

Not like everything
else in my life.

I mean, I know what
I'm supposed to want,

but it just never feels right...

Or as important as
anything in that office.

- I didn't know you were in Korea.
- Very briefly.

Did you shoot anybody?

Nope. I saw some people get killed.

That's memorable.

My father died right
in front of me...

Heart attack. I was 12.

- I'm sorry to hear that.
- It was pretty violent.

The TV was on.

That's why I hate sports.

Nobody was around...

Saturday afternoon.
My mother was shopping.

I saw my father die too.

He was kicked by a horse....

You're kidding.

- What about your mother?
- I never knew her.

Why is there a dog
in the Parthenon?

That is a roach.
Let's go someplace darker.

I hate dating. I'm terrible at it.

You'll find someone.

You know you're cute as hell.

Men don't exactly stop
and stare in the streets.

Do you want that?

That's not what you
were supposed to say.

What do you care what I think?

Well, everybody thinks
I slept with you

to get the job.

They joke about it,

like it's so funny

because the possibility
was so remote.

It's not because you
aren't attractive.

I have to keep rules about work.

I have to.

You're an attractive girl, Peggy.

Not as attractive as some
of your other secretaries,

I guess.

You don't want to start
giving me morality lessons,

do you?

People do things, right?

My mother thinks you
were responsible,

because you were the only person

who visited me in the hospital.

Jesus. Really?

She hates you.

Do you know who it was?

Of course I do.

Do you ever think about it?

I try not to...

But then it comes
up out of nowhere.

Playgrounds.

Get up!

Get up!

- Come on! Get up!
- Get up!

- Come on, get up!
- Get up.

- Come on.
- Come on, get up!

Get up! Get up!

- Come on, get up!
- Come on, get up!

Get up! Get up, bum!

- Come on.
- It's a fix.

- The fix is in.
- What happened?

- It's over.
- Already? Who won?

- Clay.
- Don't believe that for a second.

No one goes down like that.

That's what the man just said.

Some fight. I lost 100 bucks
in two minutes.

Let's go back, pack up and go home.

Damn elevator's like a rocket.

I think I'm gonna be sick.

Are you okay?

Do you want any water?

What?

I have toothpaste and a
toothbrush in my desk.

Peggy?...

- Peggy.
- I'll be right back.

Peggy?

Duck?

What are you doing?

Leaving Draper a little present.

Don't! That's disgusting.

Would you let me concentrate?

This is Roger's office.

Now come one. Pull up your pants.

I'm not going anywhere

without you.

Baby. Baby, I need you so bad.

You wouldn't answer your phone

and your roommate said
you were still at work.

Why didn't you answer
the phone, Peewee?

What's going on?

Just go lay down.

You don't belong in here.

So, Peggy, I see you're not alone.

I guess when screwing me
couldn't get you anything,

you had to go back to Draper.

- Duck, let's go.
- No.

That's right. We were in love.

Turns out she's just another whore.

Hey!

Jesus! Would you stop?!

Stop it! You're both drunk!

You know, I killed
17 men at Okinawa.

Uncle.

What the hell is wrong with you?

You still think
you're better than me?

Come on, Peggy. Let's go.

I got rid of him. Are you okay?

Yeah.

Are you?

I, uh... I never thought...

I'm so sorry. I...

you know what? I don't
know why I was with him.

- It was a confusing time.
- Stop.

You don't have to explain.

Can you get me a drink?

How long are you gonna
go on like this?

I have to make a phone call

and I know it's going
to be bad, okay?

Oh.

Do you want to be alone?

Just make me a drink.

Sorry if I embarrassed you.

- Hello.
- It's me.

She's gone.

I know.

She wanted you to know.

I'm sorry I didn't call. I was...

did she want to talk to me?

You know, she wasn't really there.

I'm coming out.

I'll make the arrangements.

No need. She left
her body to science.

She said that she wanted to go

to U.C.L.A. Medical
school tuition-free.

Of course she did.

I'm coming out.
I'll take care of the house.

I'd like to stay here
if that's okay with you,

take some time off from school.

Of course. That's fine.

She's in a better place.

That's what they say.

It's late and it's been a long day.

Okay.

- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.

Stephanie.

What happened?

Somebody very important to me died.

Who?

The only person in the
world who really knew me.

That's not true.

You should go home.

You can come in late.

I'll be fine.

I'm so sorry.

Good night.

Drop and give me 20.

You asshole.

Get to work. It's 10:30, maggot.

- Oh.
- Did you spend the night here?

- Yeah.
- See the fight?

No.

90 seconds of boxing and
three hours of analysis.

- And we still don't know who won.
- Clay won.

Read the paper.

Come in.

You look fresh. Did you go home?

I spruced up. Come over here.

Look at this.

I think you have to know the photo.

It's on the front page of
every paper. It's historic.

How do we know it's the
tourister that got knocked out?

Because the slogan will say so.

How do you put it on TV?
Are they animated?

Why are you shitting on this?

I'm tired.

It's good.

It's very good.

Give it to Joey... No, Stan...

Then go home, shower,

then come back and
give me 10 tag lines.

Okay.

Open or closed?

Open.