Mad Men (2007–2015): Season 1, Episode 1 - Smoke Gets in Your Eyes - full transcript

♪ Ba-ba ba-ba-ba ♪

♪ Ba-ba ba-ba-ba ♪

♪ Ba-ba ba-ba-ba ♪

♪ Ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba ♪

♪ I've never wanted ♪

♪ Wealth untold ♪

♪ My life has one design ♪

♪ A simple little ♪

♪ Band of gold ♪

♪ To prove that you are mine ♪

Finished, sir?



Yeah. Hey, do you have a light?

♪ I don't want the
world to have and hold ♪

♪ For fame is not my life ♪

Old Gold man, huh?

Lucky Strike here.

Can I ask you a question?
Why do you smoke Old Gold?

I'm sorry, sir. Is Sam
here bothering you?

He can be a little chatty.

No, we're actually just
having a conversation.

Is that okay?

Can I get you another drink?

Yeah. Do this again.
Old-fashioned, please.

So you obviously need to relax

after working here all night.



I guess. I don't know.

But what is it? I mean, low-tar?

Those new filters?

Why... I mean... Why Old Gold?

They gave 'em to
us in the service...

A carton a week for free.

So you're used
to 'em, is that it?

Yeah. They're a habit.

I could never get you
to try another brand...

Say, my Luckies?

I love my Old Golds.

All right, well, let's
just say tomorrow

a tobacco weevil comes

and eats every last
Old Gold on the planet.

That's a sad story.

It's a tragedy.

Would you just stop smoking?

I think I could find something.

I love smoking.

"I love smoking."
That's very good.

My wife hates it.

Reader's Digest
says it will kill you.

Yeah, I heard about that.

Ladies love their magazines.

Yes, they do.

♪ Just want ♪

♪ A little band of gold ♪

♪ To prove that you are mine ♪

♪ Ba-ba ba-ba-ba ♪

♪ Ba-ba ba-ba-ba ♪

♪ Ba-ba ba-ba-ba ♪

♪ Ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba ♪

You weren't worried about
waking me, were you?

Am I interrupting anything?

Mmm, no.

You're lucky I'm
still up working

and I'm alone.

How's it going?

They invented something
called Grandmother's Day.

That ought to keep me
busy drawing puppies

for a few months.

Can I run a few ideas past you?

Does that mean
what I think it means?

Because I'm familiar
with most of your ideas.

I'm having a situation
with my cigarette account.

Wow, you really
are here to talk.

The Trade Commission
is cracking down

on all of our health claims.

I get Reader's Digest.

This is the same scare
you had five years ago.

You dealt with it.

I know I slept a lot better,

knowing doctors smoke.

Well, that's just it.

The whole "safer
cigarette" thing is over.

No more doctors,
no more testimonials,

no more cough-free,
soothes your T-zone,

low-tar,
low-nicotine, filter tip.

Nothing.

All I have is a crush-proof box

and "four out of five dead
people smoke your brand."

Is this the part where I say,

"Don Draper is the
greatest ad man ever,

"and his big, strong
brain will find a way

to lead the sheep to
the slaughterhouse"?

I don't want to go
to school tomorrow.

You gonna pitch to me or not?

Midge, I'm serious.
I have nothing.

I am over, and they're
finally gonna know it.

Next time you see me,

there will be a bunch
of young executives

picking meat off my ribs.

That's a pretty picture.

What's your secret?

Nine different ways to say...

"I love you, Grandma."

We should get married.

You think I'd make
a good ex-wife?

I'm serious.

You have your own business.

You don't mind when I come over.

What size Cadillac do you take?

You know the rules.

I don't make plans,

and I don't make breakfast.

Sterling's having the tobacco
people in in nine hours,

and I have nothing.

People love smoking.

There's nothing that you,
the Trade Commission,

or Reader's Digest
can do to change that.

There's this kid who comes
by my office every day,

looks where he's
gonna put his plants.

Is he handsome?

23.

Uh, not right away.

Pal, could you take
the long way up?

I am really enjoying
the view here.

You going to Campbell's
bachelor party?

Yeah, I want to be there

before they tie an
anchor around his neck

and drag him out to sea.

I hear she's a nice girl.

Eh, who wants that?

What did you do that for?

She'll probably be
assigned to one of us.

Then she'll know
what she's in for.

You got to let them know
what kind of guy you are.

Then they'll know
what kind of girl to be.

I have a feeling
we won't be going

to your bachelor party soon.

Yeah, well,
compared to Campbell,

I'm a Boy Scout.

Excuse me. Is he expecting you?

He's not expecting anything.

Oh, honey, don't worry.
I'll get home safely.

I have an important
appointment right now,

so why don't you go
shopping or something?

Take your mother to lunch.

Tell her it was my idea.

Wow. He's good.

It's just a bachelor
party, dear.

No, I really don't know
what they have planned,

but judging from the creative
brain power around here,

we'll probably end up
seeing My Fair Lady.

I'll tell you what.

I'll drop by your place
on my way home.

Your mother can check
under my fingernails.

Of course I love you.

I'm giving up my life
to be with you, aren't I?

What a great gal.

Tell ya, boys,

she stole my heart.

And her old man's loaded.

Now, this is the
executive floor.

It should be
organized, but it's not,

so you'll find
account executives

and creative executives
all mixed in together.

Please don't ask
me the difference.

Great.

Hopefully, if you
follow my lead,

you can avoid some of
the mistakes I've made here.

Hello, Joan. Like that one.

So how many
trains did it take you?

Only one, but I
got up very early.

In a couple of years,
with the right moves,

you'll be in the city
with the rest of us.

Of course, if you really
make the right moves,

you'll be out in the country,

and you won't be
going to work at all.

You'll be here just
across the aisle from me.

We'll both take care of
Mr. Draper for the time being.

I don't know what
your goals are,

but don't overdo
it with the perfume.

Keep a fifth of
something in your desk.

Mr. Draper drinks rye.

Also, invest in some
aspirin, Band-Aids,

and a needle and thread.

Rye is Canadian, right?

You better find out.

He may act like he
wants a secretary,

but most of the time,

they're looking for something

between a mother and a waitress.

And the rest of
the time, well...

Go home, take a paper bag,

and cut some eyeholes out of it.

Put it over your
head, get undressed,

and look at
yourself in the mirror.

Really evaluate where your
strengths and weaknesses are,

and be honest.

I always try to be honest.

Good for you.

Now, try not to be overwhelmed

by all this technology.

It looks complicated,

but the men who designed it

made it simple enough
for a woman to use.

I sure hope so.

At lunch, pick up a
box of chocolates,

a dozen carnations,
and some bath salts.

I'll explain later.

Thank you, Miss Holloway.

You're really wonderful for
looking out for me this way.

It's Joan.

And listen,

don't take this the wrong way,

but a girl like you, with
those darling little ankles,

I'd find a way to make 'em sing.

Also, men love scarves.

Good morning, Mr. Draper.

Oh! And Mr. Sterling.
How are you?

Morning, girls.

You look like a hundred
bucks. Long night?

It's not this
tobacco thing, is it?

It's been on my mind.

Yeah, well, I should hope so.

Lee Garner, his father,

the whole Lucky Strike
family will be here at 4.

You worried?

No.

If I was worried, I'd
ask you what you've got,

but I'm not, so I'm just going to
assume you've got something,

which means you
should be worried.

So you came here because you
wanted to watch me get dressed?

No, I wanted to make
sure you were here.

In body. Give me
about a half hour

for the rest of it.

Oh.

How do I put this?

Have we ever hired any Jews?

Not on my watch.

That's very funny.
It's not what I meant.

We've got an Italian.
Salvatore, my art director.

That won't work. Sorry.

Most of the Jewish guys
work for the Jewish firms.

Yeah, I know.

Selling Jewish products
to Jewish people.

That's very good.

It's just that our 11:00

is with Menken's
Department Store

and I wish we had
someone to make them feel...

comfortable.

You want me to run down to
the deli and grab somebody?

You missed a button.

Ah. Look at you, Gidget.

Still trying to fill
out that bikini?

Summer's coming.

Without the medical claims,

all we have is a white
box with a red spot on it.

My neighbor posed for that.

Believe me, he always
looks very relaxed.

Of course, he doesn't smoke.

Had him hold a pencil.

If I know these guys,

you're better off with
a little sex appeal.

Can you give me a
woman in a bathing suit,

put her next to your guy?

A sexy girl? I can do that.

Give you a chance
to get a real model.

Oh, I love my work.

Speaking of sexy girls,

are you going to
Pete's bachelor party?

I'm not really big
on those things.

Tell me about it.
It's so embarrassing.

If a girl's gonna
shake it in my face,

I want to be alone
so I can do something.

Should we drink before
the meeting or after?

Or both?

So... that's it, huh? Relax?

Don't be short with me.

You're the writer.

I thought it was worth a try.

Greta Guttman
is here to see you.

Send her in.

Oh, great.

Now we get to hear
from our man in research.

Mr. Draper, Mr. Romano,

you both seemed more
relaxed than I expected.

Do you have some kind of
surprise for the tobacco people?

I'm doing my own research.

If you're planning to continue
with medical testimony,

you'll only be inviting further
government interference.

We must police ourselves.

There's your slogan.
The medical thing is dead.

We understand that.

Yes, dead. An apt
choice of words,

considering the
public is convinced

that cigarettes are poisonous.

If we can't insist
that they're not,

I believe my most recent surveys

have provided a solution.

We can still suggest

that cigarettes are
part of American life,

or too good to give up,

or, most appealing, an
assertion of independence.

So, basically, if you love
danger, you'll love smoking.

We can put a skull and
crossbones on the label.

I love it.

Before the war,

when I studied
with Adler in Vienna,

we postulated that what
Freud called the death wish

is as powerful a drive

as those for sexual reproduction

and physical sustenance.

Freud, you say?

What agency is he with?

So we're supposed to believe

that people are
all living one way

and secretly thinking
the exact opposite?

That's ridiculous.

Let me tell you
something, Miss Guttman...

Doctor.

Dr. Guttman.

Psychology might be
great at cocktail parties,

but it so happens that
people were buying cigarettes

before Freud was born.

The issue here isn't why
should people smoke.

It's why should people
smoke Lucky Strike.

Suggesting that our
customers have a...

What did you call
it? A death wish?

I just don't see
that on a billboard.

So what if Reader's Digest
says they're dangerous?

They also said Bambi
was the book of the century.

There's no proof.

There's conclusive proof

that none of these
low-tar, low-nicotine,

or filtration systems

have any effect on the
incidences of lung cancer.

Just give me the damn report.

I think you'll find
it very convincing.

I'm sure I will.

You're the one who found

all of our medical
testimonials in the first place.

That's true,
Mr. Draper, but I...

Has anyone else seen this?

Of course not.
It's your account.

Good.

I don't want to hear
about it anymore.

I'm sorry. I just find your
whole approach perverse.

Good luck at the meeting.

I'm sure it will be a quick one.

Sal, I'll take that drink now.

Mr. Draper.

Excuse me.

Mr. Draper.

I'm sorry to wake you,
but Mr. Campbell is outside.

He doesn't know I'm
sleeping in here, does he?

No, sir.

That's good.

Who are you?

I'm Peggy Olson, the new girl.

Can you go out there
and entertain him?

I know it's my first day,

and I don't want to
seem uncooperative,

but do I have to?

I see your point.

I brought you some aspirin.

Send him in.

You look like a hundred bucks.

Ready to go sweet-talk
some retail Jews?

You are tough to take first
thing in the morning, Pete.

I've never had any complaints.

Speaking of which, who's
your little friend here?

She's the new girl.

You always get the new girl.

Management gets all the perks.

Where are you from, honey?

Miss Deaver's
Secretarial School.

Top notch.

But I meant where are you from?

Are you Amish or something?

No. I'm from Brooklyn.

Well, you're in the city now.

It wouldn't be a sin
for us to see your legs.

If you pull your waist in,
you might look like a woman.

Is that all, Mr. Draper?

Hey, I'm not done here.

I'm working my way up.

That will be all.

Peggy, right? Yes.

Oh, and it's time for
your 11:00 meeting.

Oh, and sorry about
Mr. Campbell here.

He left his manners back
at the fraternity house.

She's a little young
for you, Draper.

The future Mrs. Pete
Campbell is a very lucky woman.

When's the wedding again?

Sunday. Did Ken tell you

about the bachelor
party tonight?

He sure did.

So do I get first crack at her?

Word is she took down
more sailors than The Arizona.

How old are you, Pete?

I just turned 26.

I bet the whole world looks like

one great big brassiere strap

just waiting to be snapped, huh?

You are good with words, Draper.

Campbell, we're both men here,

so I'm gonna be direct.

Christ, are you already
sleeping with her?

Advertising is a
very small world,

and when you do something
like malign the reputation

of a girl from the steno
pool on her first day,

you make it even smaller.

Keep it up, and even
if you do get my job,

you'll never run this place.

You'll die in that
corner office,

a mid-level executive
with a little bit of hair

who women go
home with out of pity.

Want to know why?

'Cause no one will like you.

Oh! Here are our
miracle-workers now.

You know Pete
Campbell, of course,

your account executive if you
choose to do business with us.

And this handsome
fellow is Don Draper,

the best creative
director in New York.

Well, at least the building.
Pleasure to meet you.

Oop. Sorry about that.

I'm Rachel Menken.

Oh. Uh, sorry. I
was expecting...

You were expecting
me to be a man.

My father was, too.

And you are?

Why, Don, you
remember David Cohen

from the art department.

Of course! David.

One of the rising stars
here at Sterling Cooper.

Well, why don't we make
ourselves comfortable?

And Miss Menken, you can
tell us what you have in mind.

Wonderful.

That's very subtle.

Isn't that your shirt?

Had to go all the
way to the mailroom,

but I found one.

So you must be Peggy Olson.

Joan Holloway sent you over.

She's a great girl. How is Joan?

She sends her regards.

She's a lot of fun.

Must be a scream
to work with her.

Yes, it's pretty terrific.

Mm-hmm.

Try to make
yourself comfortable.

Relax.

I see from your
chart, and your finger,

that you're not married.

That's right.

And yet you're interested
in the contraceptive pills.

Well, I was...

No reason to be nervous.

Joan sent you to me because
I'm not here to judge you.

There's nothing wrong
with a woman being practical

about the possibility
of sexual activity.

Spread your knees.

That's good to hear.

Although, as a doctor,

I'd like to think that putting
a woman in this situation

is not gonna turn her
into some kind of strumpet.

Slide your fanny toward
me. I'm not gonna bite.

I'll warn you now,

I will take you off this
medicine if you abuse it.

It's for your own good, really.

But the fact is, even
in our modern times,

easy women...

don't find husbands.

I understand, Dr. Emerson.

I really am a very
responsible person.

Well, I'm sure you're
not that kind of girl.

Now, Joan...

I'm just kidding along
here. You can get dressed.

I'm gonna write you a
prescription for Enovid.

They're $11 a month,

but don't think
you have to go out

and become the town pump

just to get your money's worth.

Excuse my French.

So what Don is saying

is that through a
variety of media,

including a spot during
The Danny Thomas Show,

if you can afford it,

we could really boost awareness.

Then, a 10% off coupon
in select ladies' magazines

will increase your
first-time visitors.

Once we get them into the store,

the rest...

is kind of up to you.

Mr. Draper, our
store is 60 years old.

We share a wall with Tiffany's.

Honestly, a coupon?

Miss Menken, coupons work.

I think your father would
agree with the strategy.

He might, but he's not here

because we just had
our lowest sales year ever.

So I suppose what I think

matters most right now.

Miss Menken, why
did you come here?

There are a dozen other agencies

better suited to your... needs.

If I wanted some man
who happened to be

from the same...
village as my father

to manage my account,

I could have stayed where I was.

Their research
favors coupons, too.

It's not just research,
Miss Menken.

Housewives love coupons.

I'm not interested
in housewives.

What kind of people do you want?

I want your kind of
people, Mr. Draper:

people who don't
care about coupons,

whether or not
they can afford it.

People who are
coming to the store

because it is expensive.

We obviously have
very different ideas.

Yes, like the customer
is always right?

Gentlemen, I really thought

you could do better than this.

Sterling Cooper has a
reputation for being innovative.

Miss, you are way out of line.

Don, please.

Let's not get emotional here.

There's no reason
we can't talk this out.

Talk out what? This silly idea

that people are gonna come to
some store they've never been to

because it's more expensive?

It works for Chanel.

Menken's is not Chanel.

That's a vote of confidence.

What Don's saying is,

Chanel is a very
different kind of place.

It's French, it's
continental, it's...

Not just another Jewish
department store?

Exactly.

You were right, Roger.

This place really runs on charm.

This is ridiculous. Don.

I'm not gonna let a
woman talk to me like this.

This meeting is over.
Good luck, Miss Menken.

Hey, Don, I don't blame you.

She was way out of line.

Adding money and education

doesn't take the rude
edge out of people.

Roger's not gonna be happy,

so I guess that's good for you.

I'm not gonna pretend
I don't want your job,

but you were right.

I'm not great with people,

and you are.

I mean, not counting that
meeting we were just in.

So I'm kind of counting
on you to help me out.

There's plenty
of room at the top.

Look, I'm sorry I was
so hard on you before.

It's just this damn
tobacco thing.

You'll think of
something. A man like you

I'd follow into
combat blindfolded,

and I wouldn't be the first.

Am I right, buddy?

Let's take it a little slower.

I don't want to
wake up pregnant.

Fuck you.

Dr. Emerson's a dream, isn't he?

He seemed nice.

He has a place in South Hampton.

I'm not saying
that I've seen it,

but it's beautiful.

Now, don't be nervous,

but this is the nerve
center of the office.

You and your boss
rely on the willing

and cheerful cooperation

of a few skilled employees.

Never snap, yell,

or be sarcastic with them.

And above all,

always be a supplicant.

I know you girls are busy,
but we've got a new one.

Peggy, this is Marge,
Nanette, and Ivy.

I brought you some things.

I guess a sort of
"getting to know you" gift.

Well, aren't you a sweetheart?

If I know Joan,
the candy's for me.

Joan, you're not fair.

You know she has
to lose eight pounds

by the Christmas party.

I think you look great.

Yeah, it's because
I'm sitting down.

You can come back and
visit any time you want, honey.

Who does she work for?

Don Draper.

They got rid of Eleanor?

She moved on.

Draper wasn't interested.

Well, she couldn't
get a call through.

Rude little thing.

We see that you've
got your hands full.

Don't want to be a bother.

Nice meeting you.

Hey, you have great legs.

I bet you Mr. Draper
would like them

if he could see them.

Sterling Cooper.

How may I direct your call?

I just don't know
what we have to do

to make these government
interlopers happy.

They tell us to make
a safer cigarette,

we do it,

and then suddenly
that's not good enough.

Might as well be
living in Russia.

Mmm. Damn straight.

You know, this
morning I got a call

from my competitors
at Brown & Williamson,

and they're getting sued
by the federal government

because of the health
claims they made.

Yeah, we're aware
of that, Mr. Garner,

but you have to realize

that through the manipulation
of the mass media,

the public is under
the impression

that your cigarettes
are linked to...

certain fatal diseases.

Manipulation of the media?

Hell, that's what I pay you for.

Our product is fine.
I smoke 'em myself.

My granddad smoked
'em. He died at 95 years old.

He was hit by a truck.

I understand. But
our hands are tied.

We're no longer
allowed to advertise

that Lucky Strikes are safe.

So what the hell
are we gonna do?

We've already funded our
own tobacco research center

to put this whole rumor to rest.

And that's a very good start.

But it may not affect sales.

Don, I think maybe
that's your cue.

Well, uh...

I have been, uh...

thinking quite a bit about this,

and, uh...

I mean, you know I'm a Lucky
Strike man from way back, so...

I might have a solution.

At Sterling Cooper,

we've been pioneering the
burgeoning field of research,

and our analysis shows

that the health risks
associated with your product

is not the end of the world.

People get in their cars
every day to go to work,

and some of them die.

Cars are dangerous.

There's nothing
you can do about it.

You still have to get
where you're going.

Cigarettes are exactly the same,

so why don't we simply say,

"So what if cigarettes
are dangerous?

"You're a man.

"The world is dangerous.

"Smoke your cigarette.

You still have to get
where you're going."

That's very interesting.

I mean, if cigarettes
were dangerous,

it would be interesting.

Except they aren't.

That's your slogan?

"You're going to die
anyway. Die with us"?

Actually, it's a fairly well-established
psychological principle

that society has a death wish,

and if we could
just tap into that,

the market potential is...

What the hell are
you talking about?

Are you insane?

I'm not selling rifles here.

I'm in the tobacco business.

We're selling America.

The Indians gave it
to us, for shit's sake.

Come on, Dad.

Let's get out of here.

The bright spot
is, at least we know

if we have this problem,

everybody has this problem.

Gentlemen, before you
leave, can I just say something?

I don't know, Don. Can you?

The Federal Trade
Commission and Reader's Digest

have done you a favor.

They've let you know
that any ad that brings up

the concept of cigarettes
and health together...

Well, it's just gonna make
people think of cancer.

Yes, and we're grateful to them.

But what Lee,
Jr., said is right.

If you can't make
those health claims,

neither can your competitors.

So we've got a lot of people

not saying anything
that sells cigarettes.

Not exactly.

This is the greatest
advertising opportunity

since the invention of cereal.

We have six identical companies

making six identical products.

We can say anything we want.

How do you make your cigarettes?

I don't know.

Shame on you.

We breed insect-repellent
tobacco seeds,

plant them in the
North Carolina sunshine,

grow it, cut it,
cure it, toast it...

There you go.

There you go.

But everybody else's
tobacco is toasted.

No. Everybody else's
tobacco is poisonous.

Lucky Strikes...

is toasted.

Well, gentlemen, I don't think I have
to tell you what you just witnessed here.

I think you do.

Advertising is
based on one thing:

happiness.

And you know what happiness is?

Happiness is the
smell of a new car.

It's freedom from fear.

It's a billboard on
the side of the road

that screams with reassurance

that whatever you're doing...

it's okay.

You are okay.

It's toasted.

I get it.

You had me worried.

I don't know if you
were drunk or not drunk,

but that was inspired.

For the record, I
pulled it out of thin air,

so thank you, up there.

You're looking in
the wrong direction.

So now that I've got
you in the afterglow here,

what do you say you reconsider
this presidential campaign?

I don't know.
Bunting and babies?

That's hard work.

I'd only make hash of it.

Modesty. That's adorable.

Consider the product: he's
young, handsome, Navy hero.

Honestly, it shouldn't
be too difficult

to convince America
Dick Nixon is a winner.

Mr. Draper, you've got visitors.

Could you be a little
more specific, honey?

We heard you saved the day.

Oh, thank you,
boys. I appreciate it.

I told them how
amazing you were.

I'm still tingling.

Well, looks like you're
all going to engage

in a little mid-level
camaraderie,

so I'll be on my way.

Don, thanks again
for the home run.

I love to come through.
Speaking of which,

any chance you could patch
things up with Rachel Menken?

Any way you can be as
charming as I said you were?

Haven't you had enough
of my magic for one day?

She's worth $3 million.

You're a whore.

Peggy...

Could she get us
a little more ice?

Yes, Mr. Draper? Just a minute.

Fellas, I think this party's
gonna have to move elsewhere.

We'll move wherever
you want, but it's 5:15.

The bachelor party's underway.

I don't know.

Oh, come on, Don.
All hands on deck.

Aren't you gonna help
give Pete his big sendoff?

Maybe next time.

Come on, guys.

Don will join us
later, right, Don?

If Greta's research
was any good,

I would have used it.

What are you talking about?

I'm saying I had a
report just like that.

And it's not like there's
some magic machine

that makes identical
copies of things.

I still think she was right.

Have a great night, Pete.

Congratulations.

I heard you were
amazing in the meeting.

Fear stimulates my imagination.

I just wanted to thank
you for a great first day,

and for, you know...

standing up for me
with Mr. Campbell.

First of all, Peggy,

I'm your boss,
not your boyfriend.

Second of all, you ever let Pete
Campbell go through my trash again,

and you won't be able to find a job
selling sandwiches in Penn Station.

He said he left his
fountain pen in here.

I didn't know.

I hope you don't think
I'm that kind of girl.

Of course not.

Go home. Put your curlers in.

We'll get a fresh
start tomorrow.

Oh. And, Peggy,

I need you to place a call.

♪♪

I want to see you
here every 15 minutes,

whether you have drinks or not.

Uh, every five minutes.

Let's live here.

Better do more
than look tonight.

Do you have a
girlfriend, Salvatore?

Come on. I'm Italian.

Is there some
kind of party here?

How did you swing it?

They work at the Automat.

He pressed a button,
and they came out.

I hope we're not
interrupting anything.

Definitely not.

Well, I have the best
seat. What are we drinking?

More of whatever's
making you the way you are.

I love this place.

It's hot, loud, and
filled with men.

I know what you mean.

Oh, my God. I
can already feel it.

I have a feeling you're
like this all the time.

I like to laugh.

Is that right?

Now, you stop that.

You said you like to laugh.

I mean it.

It's... It's too...

Too delicious.

Hey, I said stop it. What
do you think you're doing?

You know exactly.

Um, you know what, girls?

I think we should go.

Oh, come on.

You're hurting me.

I'll be good.

Buy the girls
whatever they want.

So, uh, what do you fellas do?

You're looking at the
finest ad men in New York.

Hell, the world.

♪♪

For the lady, a special Mai Tai,

and one whiskey neat.

So...

you're going to
ply me with drinks

and convince me what a
terrible mistake I'm making.

That is quite a drink.

You got in trouble, didn't you?

I shouldn't have lost my temper,

and I certainly shouldn't
have treated you

like anything
less than a client.

Apology accepted.

So you understand.

Now I do.

It was, uh, refreshing, really.

I mean, actually
hearing all the things

I always assumed
people were thinking.

Well, I'm not really
as bad as all that.

I was under a lot of pressure.

Another account.

Doesn't really matter.

No, it doesn't.

So, without making things worse,

can I ask you a
personal question?

Don't you want to get

a second drink in me first?

Why aren't you married?

Are you asking
what's wrong with me?

It's just that you're a
beautiful, educated woman.

Don't you think that getting
married and having a family

would make you happier
than all the headaches

that go along with...

fighting people like me?

If I weren't a woman,
I would be allowed

to ask you the same question.

And if I weren't a woman,

I wouldn't have to choose

between putting on an apron

and the thrill of
making my father's store

what I always
thought it should be.

So that's it. You
won't get married

because you find
business to be a thrill.

That and...

I've never been in love.

She won't get married because
she's never been in love.

I think I wrote that
once to sell nylons.

For a lot of people,
love isn't just a slogan.

Oh, you mean love.

You mean the big
lightning bolt to the heart

where you can't eat
and you can't work

and you just run off

and get married and make babies.

The reason you haven't felt it

is because it doesn't exist.

What you call love

was invented by guys
like me to sell nylons.

Is that right?

I'm pretty sure about it.

You're born alone,
and you die alone,

and this world just drops
a bunch of rules on you

to make you forget those facts,

but I never forget.

I'm living like
there's no tomorrow...

because there isn't one.

I don't think I realized it

until this moment,

but it must be hard
being a man, too.

Excuse me?

Mr. Draper...

Don. Mr. Draper,

I don't know what it
is you really believe in,

but I do know what it feels like

to be out of place,

to be disconnected,

to see the whole world
laid out in front of you

the way other people live it.

There is something about you

that tells me you know it, too.

I don't know if that's true.

You want another drink?

No.

But you can tell your
boss that you charmed me.

So I guess we'll be
seeing each other again.

I'll be back in the
office Monday morning,

for a real meeting.

I'd like that.

We're not buying anything.

Actually, for the
first time today,

I'm not selling anything.

Does Peggy live here?

Hold on.

Do you know him?

It's okay, Marjorie.
We work together.

He's really drunk.

It's okay, Marjorie.

So...

what are you doing?

Nothing.

Just, uh, sitting in my
room listening to records.

I'm getting married on Sunday.

I heard that.

You must think I'm a creep.

Why are you here?

I wanted to see you tonight.

Me?

I had to see you.

Marjorie?

Yeah, Peg?

I'm going to bed now.

I called the office.
They said you'd left.

I didn't want to bother you.

It's no bother.

I just assumed you were
staying in the city again.

There's a plate in the oven.

Unless you're not hungry.

I'm not.

I'll be right back.

Don't move.

♪ I have often walked ♪

♪ On this street before ♪

♪ But the pavement
always stayed ♪

♪ Beneath my feet before ♪

♪ All at once am I ♪

♪ Several stories high ♪

♪ Knowing I'm on the street ♪

♪ Where you live ♪

♪ Are there lilac trees ♪

♪ In the heart of town? ♪

♪ Can you hear a lark ♪

♪ In any other part of town? ♪

♪ Does enchantment pour ♪

♪ Out of every door? ♪

♪ No, it's just ♪

♪ On the street ♪

♪ Where you live ♪

♪ For, oh ♪

♪ The towering feeling ♪

♪ Just to know ♪

♪ Somehow you are near ♪

Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA