MacGyver (1985–1992): Season 7, Episode 9 - Deadly Silents - full transcript

There we are!

You know who she is?

Your grandma would.

That's Violet Meredith,

Just the sweetest
little thing I ever saw.

Hmm.

When talkies came in,
she just disappeared.

I never saw her again.

Now, hold on. Here,
here comes the best part.

The construction scene.

Yeah, boy. Come on.



Now, watch, watch what's
coming, watch. Yeah.

Yeah, that's some stunt, huh?

Oh! Aw...

Look at that.

Oh...

I'm impressed, pinky.

You and Karl banky really
pioneered special effects.

Oh, yeah, well...

That Karl, he... he...
he could rig anything.

You know, he was
from a legit theater.

Oh, a matinee idol.

Oh, all the girls, they
just went gaga over him.

Then, along came Rudy Valentino,

and, well, poor Karl, he
was just box office poison.



So, he went into,
uh, special effects,

And... and directing,
and producing.

Oh, he was some kind of genius.

But he was also a screwball.

So, where did you
get these prints?

Oh, well I, uh, I've been kind of
strapped, financially, you know?

And uh, i... I was thinking
of maybe selling the house,

and so I, I was up in the attic
cleaning, and... and I found them

in this old prop
studio suitcase.

I didn't even
know I still had it.

You know, if that Phoenix
foundation that you say is so good,

if they can work all
their special magic

restoring these, uh,

I won't have to sell this house.

It's all I have left.

Well...

You sure they'll be safe?

Yeah.

Karl banky, he burned my
negatives two months before he died.

You know, pinky,
I read that file.

It never proved
that Karl did it.

Well, there's some
things you just know.

Old Karl, he hated me so
much he could've killed me,

but he knew burning my
films would hurt me more.

See, that's something I don't
understand. You guys were partners.

Why did he hate you?

Violet.

Violet.

We were both head
over heels over her.

Like I said, she disappeared.

Violet, the pictures,
Karl. All gone.

I thought all those years

that my movies were
gonna last forever.

I was there, with
Keaton, chaplin, Lloyd.

Now, all these people

Will see my three best
movies, never seen before!

I'll make 'em laugh.
I'll make 'em cry.

Oh, when you're as old as I am,

You'll realize how grateful an
old guy like me can be for that, oh...

Take care of 'em.

You know I will, pink.

I just, I just can't believe it.

It's like I've gotten my
whole life back again.

Well now you can
kiss it goodbye.

Well, look at that!

Now we've got burglars
from central casting.

Put the suitcase down!

You heard him!

I know that voice.

I know that voice!
It's Karl banky!

I know it can't be, but it is.

Shut up!

Lie down on the
floor, both of you!

Do what he says, pinky.

No! He's got my movies!

I'm not gonna lie down and
take that from some dead man.

You never could take
direction, could you?

If you try to follow
us, you're both history.

In your case, pinky,
ancient history!

Yeah!

Go.

Zirconium charges,
set off by remote control.

Wait. I know this box!

Karl and I made it. It's the
first radio detonator ever used.

That explains the bullet holes.

Yeah, how'd those guys get it?

Well, look. Two stars.
See? See the logo?

It's my old studio. Oh, they
got lots of this stuff out there.

Oh, wait! Wait.
Where are you going?

I'm going to the studio!

Studio? Why?

It's a movie ranch now.
Location rentals, you know.

Wait a minute, pinky! Wait, wait
a minute. Come here. Come here.

Don't you think we should
contact the police first?

Banky's probably
burning my films right now!

I just found 'em.

If they get lost again, well I
might as well just lay down and die.

All right, all right.

We'll go after 'em.

But let's take my
car, okay? Come on.

Step on it, kiddo!

Oh, man!

Oh, sure.

Shape charges.

Bet my ignition...

Pinky?

Pinky...

Damn!

All the water's leaked out.

It smells like sulfuric acid.

And it's burned a hole
in your radiator core here.

Made a slow leak.

We can walk from here.

Pinky. We're being set up.

Pinky!

They're on the lot.

These guys gotta be like really
dim bulbs to fall for this, man.

You gotta understand
pinky's mind.

The man's a complete egomaniac.

Listen, pinky,

if we haven't been spotted
already, we're sure gonna be.

Oh, you can go. I don't blame
you for watching your Fanny.

They're my movies
and I'll get 'em back.

No, what I'm saying is, we
ought to look around first.

Find the movies. Then
see what we can do.

Wait, wait, wait.

You really want to stay with me?

Pigheaded old man that I am?

Yes.

But I want to go into this
with a plan, you know?

You know? I like
you, kid. You're okay.

But I got no time for a plan.

Look at him. Still cocky.

He doesn't know that
he's about to pay me back

for cheating me out of
what's rightfully mine.

Ours, dude.

Don't forget, I spent three
months playing security guard.

Plus, if we off the old man, I
can go up for murder just like you.

Neil, pinky burnette
is an old man

With unsteady legs and
a heart condition, get it?

If he has an accident or a heart attack,
there won't be any murder charges.

That works for me.

Good, Neil.

Hey, you know what I'm
gonna do with my share, man?

I'm gonna make a slasher movie.

I'm gonna be a filmmaker
just like you, Karl!

Come on, take
meetings, uh, do lunch.

Audition girls in bikinis.

This is the truck.

No movies.

All right, pinky, you
stay here, out of sight.

I'll try and get a closer look.

Are you gonna stay here?

Cross my heart.

He's burning my movies again!

I'm not afraid of you, banky!

Get ahold of yourself, pinky.
You don't believe in ghosts.

The man's a bigger
fool than I thought.

Oh! Oh, boy.

Pinky?

Damn!

Pinky?

Who is this stud?

You said four flat tires
was gonna lose him.

Now what are we
gonna do with him?

Whatever we have to, Neil.

Pinky?

Don't move, pinky.

Come on, pinky.
Slow down, will you?

Doggone it!

Pinky, stop!

- Snakes!

Pinky?

He's not falling, Karl.

And if he doesn't
fall, he doesn't die.

Don't rush the
moment, Mr. Filmmaker.

It's all right. It's all right.

I'm terrified of snakes.

Pinky, they're only rubber.

See?

That's a load off my mind.

I'm ready to talk about
a plan, MacGyver.

All right, pinky!

Huh?

In my back pocket,
there's a knife. Grab it.

God...

Now, give me your wallet.

What are you going to
do, Rob me or save me?

Just give me the wallet!

All right. Now open it.

- Hold it by the end, real tight.
- Uh-huh.

Okay, okay...

Okay. Shimmy over.

Okay.

Now on the count of three,
I'm gonna let go of the catwalk.

You call this a plan?

Just hang on.

You ready?

Hey.

What is this dude up to?

Nothing that's gonna
do 'em any good.

- One!
- Huh?

Two, three!

Whoa! Oh, whoa!

This dude is like
so fully awesome!

Don't start a fan
club just yet, Neil.

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
That was spectacular!

Just like Douglas
Fairbanks in the black pirate.

Yeah. Here's your wallet. Let's
get out of here, what do you think?

Oh, come on.

What's that?

Nitro. Bum ticker.

It's my suitcase. Again.

This time, it looks like, it
looks like the real thing.

Well how many of
those did they have?

Oh, you know
property departments.

They made four or
five out of everything.

Oh, yes! Okay. Bull's eye!

All right, Karl, now, nothing
fancy. Let's just go down there

and croak 'em, a little lead in
the head, bang-bang, they're dead.

Death by shooting brings
the cops, Neil. I don't want that.

What we need is an
accident here, see?

Something a little more subtle
than bang-bang, they're dead.

That's gas, pinky!
Don't breathe it!

God...

- Pinky?
- Mmm...

Pinky.

Mmm...

Pinky!

This scene look familiar?

Oh...

The hobo.

Yeah.

I was chained to
a track with Violet.

I saved her by...

By kicking the
switch to a side track.

No side track.

Where's Rex, the wonder
dog, when you need him?

There's a train coming!

Now is not a time
to panic, pinky.

Are you kidding?

Now's the perfect time to panic!

oh, god. Oh, oh, my heart,

It's
just going crazy!

Oh, my heart...

Hang in there,
pinky, I think it's...

Pinky?

Pinky?

Pinky!

Oh, no!

Uh...

Where...

Where are we?

Another sound stage.

Huh?

Look.

- Floorboards.
- Huh...

- How are you feeling?
- Uh...

Just a little run down.

See?

Way to go, Mr. Movie magic.

The old man's heart is
stronger than I thought.

Even if he had a coronary,
it still leaves the brainy dude.

I say we do 'em
now, man, both of 'em!

Neil, I hired you to help
me, not to do my thinking.

Karl.

You think I'm stupid?

Are your feelings hurt, Neil?

Yeah. I got feelings.

Okay, so i'm no
rocket scientist.

But I'm smart enough
to be a producer.

Or to snuff the guy who
stole my ticket to the top.

What about you?

I'll take care of pinky and
his friend my way, dude.

Now come on,
let's get this done.

How are we gonna
get off this track?

We'll unchain you, pinky. I got
one last surprise for the two of you.

Then it's a wrap.

Banky?

You tried to kill me.

You... you dirty rat.

Who does your plastic surgery?

You're not funny.
You never were.

Unchain 'em, Neil.

Who... who are you?

My name's Karl Meredith.
Ring any bells for you?

Violet Meredith was my
mother. Karl banky was my father.

No. No.

No, that would be
impossible. Uh-uh.

Karl he... he was a
bachelor. His whole life.

A loner.

That's how well you knew them.

They were married secretly.

So their fans would
think they were still single.

My father died a
month before I was born.

I never took his name.

Violet Meredith,
she... she hated Karl.

No. You were the
one she couldn't stand.

She adored my father. But you...

You swindled both of
them out of all their profits.

No! Those... those
movies were mine!

I never wanted the
studio. Only my work.

You ran up debts.

When you left, my father
was stuck with all the bills.

He ran up those bills.

He ran 'em up because he only
made special effects pictures!

If he were working
today, I tell you,

He'd make Terminator 2
look like a low-budget movie.

Your dad agreed
to a deal, Meredith.

He must have thought he
could turn the studio around.

No way. Not without
pinky. They were a team.

My mother told me how he died.

Slowly, painfully.

The settlement you
forced on him broke him.

You killed him, burnette.

Maybe now...

Maybe now he can rest in peace.

Outside.

Outside, move it.

What about my movies?

They've been in the
office safe the entire time.

And I got to thank you,
pinky, for finding them.

You know of course
that when you die

The rights to all of your films
revert back to my mother's estate.

You'll be happy to know
that I'm the sole heir.

- What?
- Go.

Is that true? Was that the deal?

It was part of the
settlement with banky.

You see, Violet was a
silent partner of two stars.

But when she disappeared, i... I
just never thought it would happen.

Move out.

Come on.

My mother always told me how much
you enjoyed working in the tank, pinky.

Can you tread water?

Of course I can tread water.

But I can also swallow it!

Oh, I hate this tank!

Sooner or later, you're gonna
get tired, pinky. Dead tired.

Pull up the rope ladder, Neil.

The water that you're about to inhale
was piped in from the mojave river.

That's where the cops are
going to find your bodies.

So, no one will never know that
you drowned on my father's old lot.

I like it.

Gee, that means
the world to me, Neil.

Like father, like son, Karl!

Your father played a
killer. But you are one!

Oh...

Meredith was right.

I can't keep up long like this.

Hang on, pinky.

- Pinky...
- Uh-huh?

- If you stood on my shoulders...
- Yeah?

- Think you could grab that hose?
- I don't know.

Let's give it a go, huh?

You ready?

Think you can stay up by
yourself for a few seconds?

- Yeah, I think so.
- All right.

Hey, do you think it's
safe to leave 'em there?

- How are they gonna get out, Neil?
- I don't know.

Well, think about it. Their hands
are chained. They got no exit ladder.

They'll drown by the time we
pick up the films and get back here.

Then we put 'em in the back of
the truck, head for the river. Simple.

There...

- Can you tread a little longer?
- No.

Well, you have to.

Oh!

You... you did it!

Oh...

Hey, what are you going to
do with your share of the film profits?

I don't know, maybe start
a special effects house.

I hope it comes out better
than the stuff you rigged here.

Don't laugh at me,
you little son of a...

I will not be
laughed at by a man

whose chief ambition in life
is to produce slasher films!

Chill out, dude.

You're losing your
sense of humor.

Oh, oh, stop. Stop.

I gotta... oh, I gotta stop.

One of these days,

I'm gonna tell you how old I
am, and it'll scare you to death.

All right, listen. Think you can
make it to the hotel down the street?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I could use a
bath and a good meal.

The brainy dude.

He's some sort of
Houdini or something.

- I'm not finished with those two yet!
- No, I say that you are!

And no more special effects.

Just bullets. Plain bullets.

Okay, Neil. Okay.

Oh, look at that.

Well, I gotta
hand it to you, kid.

You know that hose gag
and this, this hinge bit.

You're the second most
original thinker that I ever met.

Thanks.

I, uh...

I got a confession to make, kid.

I get the movies
back, or I don't.

This has been the most
exhilarating day I've had in 60 years.

Okay.

I don't think I can run
anymore, MacGyver.

You're not gonna have to, pinky.

We're gonna make
our stand, right here.

Anything I can do to help?

Well, I'm gonna
need a little time.

You think you can keep
those guys busy for a while?

Are you kidding? Why...

I can do five minutes,
standing on my head. Ha!

Hold it! Back it up.

I think I just saw pinky.

God, the old man's gone goofy.

Move it.

Come on. Yeah, come on...

Right into the trap.

That's for MacGyver's tires.

Oh, man! This is so bogus!

Come on, Neil!

Don't shoot us. We surrender.

Watch out, Neil.
It could be a trick.

No way.

Let's rock and roll.

It's over, dude-skies.

Nice try.

I don't like it.

- They're up to something.
- No way, man.

It's over.

Nothing personal, boys,

but I'm gonna put you out of the
misery that Karl here's been creating.

Now drop your arms.

See, I don't want
the autopsy to show

that their hands were up when this
on-duty peace officer plugged 'em.

I said, drop 'em!

You did it, pinky!

No, it wasn't me. Uh-uh.

It was you and me.

As a team.

A great team, that's
what it was. Yeah.

It was, well, it was
like Laurel and Hardy.

Or... or the Marx brothers
or abbott and costello.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, they're
here. They're all here.

Can't you hear 'em?

It's movie magic.

Oh, god, I love this business!

♪

Hey, pinky. Why
aren't you inside?

Oh, I'm just too nervous.

I... i was shaking
so much inside that...

They were laughing at
me instead of my movies.

No, no, they love 'em.

No.

Come on, pinky, the movies
are great. They're very funny.

Well, I, I did get a
sweet distribution deal.

And an offer, to
star in a big picture.

You see? That's terrific! What
are you worried about here?

Well, I don't know, I don't
know, I mean, I don't know.

It's just... just... I'm not used
to being back in the business.

Reborn. A star.

Oh, tell me I'm not
just daydreaming.

I think that's your answer.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, but, you
know there are no kids in there.

I don't think the kids are
gonna like 'em, do you?

Pinky! Were you always
this nervous in the old days?

Well, I... Of course
I was nervous.

I... i... I invented
the word "nervous."

I mean, I was what they
called a... a basket case.

Well, guess what?

You're back.

All the way back.

You're right.

I'm back! I'm back.

I am back!