MacGyver (1985–1992): Season 7, Episode 14 - The Mountain of Youth - full transcript

Baba: It is written,

"Another stranger
will follow the first.

"A resourceful man.

"He is drawn to this
abomination and to our destiny.

"he will come from the sky,

"out of the west."

(Beeping)

(Birds chirping)

(Man whistling)

- Mac!
- Jack.

You're okay?



You came for me!

Thank god. You're all right?

- Yeah, yeah.
- Nothing's broken?

No, I'm fine.

- Oh, great, now I can break your neck!
- Hey, hey, hey, amigo!

What's got into you?

You!

You and your constant hustles,
that's what's gotten into me.

Who have you been talking to?

I'm here on a legit
Phoenix mission.

Pete must've told you that.

Oh, yeah, he told me all right.

What I can't figure
is how you conned

Pete and the entire
Phoenix board



Into underwriting
this scheme of yours.

Scheme? Who said
it was a scheme?

I did. Just now.
Didn't you hear me?

I know you, Jack!

Well, that hurts.

That really hurts.

I had research, facts, figures.

No, no.

You conned a roomful
of aging bureaucrats

into thinking they could tack
80 years onto their golf game.

The fountain of youth.
Give me a break.

Boy, have you ever
become the cynic?

All right, all right,
wait a minute.

Let me explain
something to you, okay?

This valley is
part of kabulstan,

a very hostile third world country
that does not like strangers.

Now this scheme of
yours, whatever it is,

is not worth the risk.

Mac, the military
dictatorship of kabulstan

Doesn't even care
about this area.

This is ammukash valley.

A real life Shangri-la.

Hey! Ho!

This is me you're talking to.

Mac, your old pal.

I don't buy into that stuff.

Now, what is the scam?

Looking for a twitch?

Just answer the question.

I found out there's this spring.

There really is a
fountain of youth.

It's the water that
keeps 'em young.

The water, amigo.

See? No twitch. I'm not lyin'.

We're leaving here.
You know that, Jack.

The helicopter's gonna
be here in four hours.

Perfect.

Plenty of time to
get on down there

And get some samples
of the magic agua.

Hey!

I said we're leaving!

Mac, I seek only
to serve mankind.

You're looking at the
next Louis pasteur,

Jonas salk, casimir funk.

Casimir funk?

Yeah, he invented
the vitamin pill.

Look, Phoenix put up the
expedition money. We're here.

What's to stop us from
tripping on down to the spring,

scooping up a couple
of gallons for analysis

and we're on our way.

Uh, uh, eh...

Oh, oh, that's just
dust or something.

Mac, there's
something in the water

that makes people live longer.

We got to take back samples.

You're up to something more
than the betterment of mankind,

I know it. Deep
inside, I know it!

We've got four hours.

It's a nice place.

You come. You enjoy.

We get the water. We're gone.

Trust me.

Please.

Please. Please.

It's a beautiful place.

(Grunting)

Come on!

Mukti, my lovely,
you're right on time.

On time for what?

Mukti, meet MacGyver,
an old buddy of mine.

- You are also from america?
- Yeah.

How exciting.

Will the mir see me?

We're running out of time.
We got to leave in four hours.

Life is perfect.

Three times baba
refused you an audience.

And just moments
ago, he said, "yes."

All right! Let's go, Mac,
you're my lucky charm.

No, wait a minute!

What's going on here?

We have an agreement.

- Sample the water and we're gone, remember?
- Check.

We got to get permission.

What permission?

Well, you see, the water
comes from a special spring,

and the mir hasn't
been too cooperative

about giving me
access to the place.

Fact is, he... he wouldn't
even see me until today.

I knew there was a hitch!

I knew it!

No hitch.

Mukti here has been putting on
a full court press to lobby the mir.

- She's got us an audience, right?
- Yes.

See? No problemo.

Once I get eyeball to
eyeball with his highness...

Well, you know me, Mac.

The man with the golden tongue.

- (Giggles)
- Uh-huh.

Be at the crash site on time,
or I'm leaving without you.

Uh, Mr. MacGyver,
you... you cannot leave.

The mir wishes to see you also.

How does he even know I'm here?

Baba knows all. Please, come.

You heard the
lady. You're wanted.

And why should I be wanted?

Hey, who knows?

This is a mystical place.

You got to go with the flow.

Well, for me, the
flow is that way.

Hey, Mac, you want to
guess how old mukti is?

No.

She's 42 years old.

For mankind, compadre.

So Dalton tells me the kabulstanis
leave you alone pretty much.

It is true.

We have never considered
ourselves part of kabulstan.

We are the people of ammukash.

What about their military?

They have no presence here.

We govern ourselves.

We have since the dawn of time.

I have a magazine from america.

I have dreamed of going
there since I was a child.

It's a long way from ammukash.

So Dalton tells me.

He says, though, it
will not take us long

in his flying air machine.

Excuse me.

Us?

He is taking me with you.

Dalton says I will
be of continuing help

in his longevity project.

He assures me it will be
a great boon to mankind.

Here.

Jack?

This woman is a vital
part of my presentation.

What presentation?

To the Phoenix board.

She's living proof
that the water works.

Yes, I'm sure she is.

You think I'm still snowing you.

But you'll see, Mac.

You'll see.

(People chanting)

(Gonging)

(Bottles clattering)

Wow.

(People chattering)

Baba,

This is the friend I made at
the site of the fallen airship.

And another who followed him.

Their names are
Dalton and MacGyver.

They want permission to gather
water from the eternal spring.

And why do you want this water?

I'll level with you, sir.

Obviously the stuff
is pretty powerful.

I mean, look at these people.

They're what, 125,

150?

Old!

Very old.

And...

Uh...

And?

Uh...

Well, i... i...

I, uh...

Well, I... We, uh...

Uh...

MacGyver: I think what
Mr. Dalton is trying to say

is that we'd like to take some
water back with us to study.

Analyze it.

He thinks it makes
you live longer.

Have you been told
that it is forbidden

To visit that part
of our valley?

Where the eternal
spring emerges?

Mukti: Yes, baba. I told them.

But Dalton wants
to go there anyway.

He is certain the
water is purer there.

"More of a jolt," in his words.

You may go.

Mukti will take you there.

- You all right?
- Oh, yeah.

You did well, Dalton.

I did, didn't I?

Yes.

You truly are the man
with the golden tongue.

- (Giggling)
- Did I ask him about the rights?

Rights? What rights?

Uh, uh, Phoenix business.

I'll, uh... I'll get them later.

Is something wrong, MacGyver?

Oh, not yet.

But I can feel it coming.

The one called MacGyver
appears hesitant.

Have faith.

He will solve our problem.

It is written.

Oh, this stuff is so strong I can
feel it working on the way down!

Twenty years from now,

I'll be just as fresh and
sweet as I am today!

Toss me those cans, Mac.

This is crazy.

You just don't think
young, Mac. Think young.

"Drink young. Be young."

What a slogan.

Slogan?

Uh... mukti, uh,
h-how old is baba?

167.

What'd I tell you,
Mac? Incredible, huh?

He was 36 when your Abraham
Lincoln was elected president.

That's kind of hard to believe.

(Rumbling)

What was that?

The devil's rumbling.

It is the reason that baba has
made this a forbidden place.

Just because the ground rumbled?

That, and also because some
who have ventured this way

have not returned.

(Rumbling)

The water! It
never stops flowing.

The spring is eternal!

Oh, come on, this must
be some kind of a joke, huh?

I... i used to gather
water here every day,

and never have I seen it stop.

A million years the
magic water runs.

I get one taste of it, and the
big guy shuts off the service!

Jack!

It stopped too
fast to be natural.

Well, we can still get samples.

Fill up those cans, quick.

You know, maybe
it's being diverted.

How could that be?

Well, a strong pump could
send it in any direction.

But why? Who
would want to do that?

Try 100 million people.

Not counting Beverly Hills.

Jack: Where are you going?

To find the pump.

But many people
have disappeared.

And baba only granted us
permission to go to the spring.

I think baba will understand.

The water stopped
at the perfect time.

There are no accidents, ram.

This man is strong
of will and mind.

He is the one.

Come, Dalton.

Hey, wait for me.

Hey, these things are heavy.

Give me a hand, Mac.

Hey, Mac.

No.

She must accompany him.

What is it?

It's a pump house.

Mukti: Kabulstani
soldiers in our valley.

What are they doing here?

MacGyver: Well, they're
using the water for something.

More soldiers!

Fire! They mustn't get away.

Samad: Spare the girl.

The holy man! Do not shoot!

Mukti: Baba, no! Get away!

Baba!

Baba, no! Baba! Baba!

Fire!

(Guns firing)

They're getting away.

They won't go far.

Why do you wish
the girl to be spared?

She could be of some value.

Yes, sir.

Now, find them.

Yes, sir.

Ram: Careful.

(Baba groaning)

Ram: Slowly.

Yeah, great. Here.

My meditation cave.

(Coughing)

We have lost much
to these soldiers.

Barbarians. Killers.

Now do you understand

Why I decreed
this area forbidden?

Well, not exactly,
but I'm sure I will.

You have my permission
to continue your quest.

All right, the others will
get you back to the temple.

Baba: You will need help.

Take mukti and
your friend with you.

Jack: What?

Where?

Hey, I can get
everything we came for

without leaving
the neighborhood.

I left three cans
down by the spring.

(Shushing)

MacGyver is enlightened.

He understands.

Go now, quickly.

It is unthinkable for
me to go with them now.

It is my place to
be here with you.

No. No.

It is a minor wound.

Ram will attend me.

You must go.

There is much you must
learn of the way of others

before your journey is complete.

Go. Go now.

Go.

(Coughing)

Jack: What is this?

You're the one that's so
hot to meet the chopper.

Well, that's changed now.

You're getting us
involved in trouble, Mac.

Oh, that's kind of
a switch, isn't it?

I'm talking big trouble. Mac!

Mac!

(Water pump whirring)

The secret of long life
down there waiting to be had,

And I'm up here
about to get killed.

- (Shushing)
- I must be losing it.

What are we doing here?

MacGyver: That pump house is
diverting the water somewhere.

Oh, of course. Hurry, Mac.

Your rescue choppers
run strictly on schedule.

(Both chattering)

(Water pump whirring)

(Beeping)

(Beeping)

(Soldiers chattering
in foreign language)

Come on.

What we're looking
for is in that mountain.

I'm not going in that mountain.

Let's get out of here.

Jack!

Here, give me
your high, hard one.

Soldier: Hey!

(Soldiers speaking
in foreign language)

Mac.

Holy Toledo!

What is it?

It's a calutron.

It's a heavy water plant.

What is that?

Big trouble.

You want to make an h-bomb,
you build a heavy water plant.

What do these h-bombs do?

Kill people.

Just one will wipe out a
city the size of New York.

Why would the kabulstanis
want such a fearful device?

Power, greed.

Insanity.

Welcome to our world.

That's Dr. Liang.

You know that dude?

Yeah.

Liang's a Chinese
h-bomb scientist.

He probably
brought the calutron.

You think the UN
knows about this?

I doubt it.

I'd testify, but they'd
never believe me.

- Let's go.
- No.

We're gonna need proof.

Wait here. I'll be right back.

I hate it when he
says that. I hate it!

You wait here, love.
I'll be back in a second.

(Keyboard clacking)

(Test tubes clinking)

Where's Jack?

He went below.

What?

I got more water.
Enough to take tests.

How'd you do?

I will take those.

(Glass shattering)

Search them!

You should've
stayed in the valley.

You never should've come back.

A contract.

"Be young products
and Jack Dalton.

"For commercial water rights."

a very transparent cover-up

for your spy
operation, gentlemen.

(Samad exclaims)

The Phoenix foundation.

That confirms it.

You are American spies.

Take them away!

You lied to me, Jack.

Never! About what?

"Be young
products," that's what.

Now cut the baloney.
What's going on?

(Sighing)

be young products has
agreed to pay me $200,000

if I get the exclusive rights.

To what?

A bottling plant in ammukash.

Oh, man.

"Drink be young water.

"From the eternal
spring of ammukash."

But they wanted samples first.

This is why you
enlisted my help, Dalton?

I was gonna cut
you in on it, mukti.

You're living proof
the stuff works.

You were gonna make a
fortune doing commercials.

"I drink be young
and look half my age."

That is why you wanted
me to go to america?

To do commercials?

Hey, Jack, give
me the test tube.

What test tube?

The one you held back.

I know you, remember?

Hey, come on, would you rather stick
around here and be executed, is that it?

Come on, come on.

Boy,

Can't even keep one
lousy test tube of water.

Mukti, can I borrow your scarf?

(MacGyver coughs)

What are you doing?

MacGyver: These
wires control the door.

Next time it opens, it
should short out the lock.

And if we're lucky,

this will hold the door shut,

As if it is locked.

What did you find on them?

Papers from the
Phoenix foundation

and some worthless
test tubes of water.

What of the videotape missing
from the surveillance room?

Did not find it.

Jack: Hey, just the
guys I want to see!

My company, be young products, is
prepared to cut your government in.

- Forty cents on the bottle.
- Shut up, you imbecile.

We know you are American spies.

Where is the
videotape you stole?

I can beat the truth out of him.

No need.

Your bravery will be of no
help to your government.

Organize a firing squad

and execute them.

Yes, sir.

When you die, what you
know of our secret plant

will die with you.

(Speaking mandarin)

(Speaking mandarin)

You saved my life once.

Unfortunately, I cannot
do the same for you.

Then you have not
changed, samad.

Oh, but I have.

I have gained great knowledge.

I see only that you have

learned to exploit our
people and our land.

It is evil knowledge,

applied by tyrants
and madmen alone.

No, mukti.

It is power.

The exercise of
power transcends evil.

Who's that guy?

My twin brother.

Whoa! Twin?

Well, this fits in the
promotion perfectly!

The two of you, side
by side, with the water,

- Without the water, in a photo session.
- Jack!

Didn't you hear what she
said about the exploitation

of her people and the land?

I'm not like that. So what's
the story on your brother?

He killed an elder in a dispute.

He... he was a... a
violent child, always angry.

The people of the valley
wanted him punished by death.

I pleaded for his life.

The mir showed mercy and had
him banished from ammukash forever.

All right.

(Whispering) Chopper's on its
way. Let's get those water samples.

Will you stop?

They have escaped! Follow me.

The only way out
is through the tunnel.

MacGyver: The tape.

Jack, grab an end.

(Soldiers exclaiming)

(Speaking in foreign language)

They must not leave this valley.

You two, that way. Follow me.

All right, take
mukti to the cave.

I'm gonna try and put their
plan on hold for a while.

And if I don't make it back,

that tape has got
to make it to the UN.

And you're trusting me?

Yeah.

What a switch.

(Guns firing)

(Soldiers screaming)

All right.

(People chanting)

(People chattering)

Woman #1: Baba!

Woman #2: Baba!

(Helicopter whirring)

The chopper's here, mukti.
We better make tracks.

I am not going with you.

My place is here in ammukash

you and Dalton, in his own way,

Have helped me to
journey to the truth.

Of things beyond the valley

And inside of myself.

We would have made a great team.

(People chattering)

You chose well.

I only hope that good can come
from Dalton's plan for our water.

I trust that plan
will change, mukti.

Hold it, Mac.

What are you doing?

I can't promote a
bottling plant here.

It'd create a media circus.

Con men and two-bit
developers would converge

like buzzards on
a fresh road kill.

You don't mess
with perfection, Mac.

Bad Karma.

(Laughs)