MacGyver (1985–1992): Season 4, Episode 6 - The Survivors - full transcript

For the past two
months, I'd been taking groups

of Phoenix foundation field
operatives into the wilderness,

pitting them against nature

And themselves.

If they made it through

the three grueling
days of survival testing,

they were recertified
for field duty,

and life went on pretty
much the same as always.

If they didn't
make it, like bill foy,

they were reassigned
to other duties.

I was tired.



I smelled like a monkey
cage, and I felt like a prize fink.

Who was I to judge my peers?

Rough day at the office?

Pete.

Just the man I wanted to see.

You've got to get me
off this assignment.

I just washed out bill foy.

Bill foy?

Yeah, and I don't feel
too good about it, either.

Well, you do realize he's
ten years younger than I am.

Well, I guess he just spent
too many years behind a desk.

He was out of it by
the end of the first day.

And... he broke his leg.

Well, that's what
I'm here to tell you.



You've got, uh, one
more party of one

and then you get your
rotation off the assignment.

One. Must be somebody
pretty important.

Yeah, it is.

Yeah? Who?

Me.

You want some stew?

I made it myself.

Well, out of a can.

It's hot.

Yeah, word came
down about a week ago.

No exemptions
from recertification.

I put it off as long as I could.

I didn't think anybody as high
up as you had to go through this.

Listen, I set this
program up myself.

Years ago.

Because I believed
that field operatives

had to be ready for anything.

Otherwise they
couldn't be trusted.

And, uh... now here I am,

and, uh...

I let myself get just a...
Little bit out of shape.

You're not worried
about this, are you?

Worried?

Listen, what's to worry?

I've just got to face it.

Either I make it, or I don't.

You're worried.

Yeah.

Look, Pete, I'd be lying to you

If I said this course was easy.

But it's nothing you
haven't been through before.

Yeah. I aced it once.

Last time, I even enjoyed it.

Of course that was...

A hundred years
and 30 pounds ago.

Well, it... isn't anything
I haven't done before.

Right?

Follow me.

Closely.

Pete, you okay?

Yeah.

That's kind of a tough landing.

Oh... lucky I've got the
padding for that, eh?

So, what's next on
the list of tortures?

Well, I call it an
obstacle course.

Some of the others
call it macgyverland.

Macgyverland?

Okay, I've done that.

Now what?

All right.

Ready for this?

The first move is up the ladder.

Then you're out to the rope...

Crawl across here...

Ease yourself down the rope.

Hang onto the rope for this.

Keep your feet together.

A little flourish at the end...

See, it's not so bad.

Macgyverland, huh?

How did bill foy do here?

Well, actually, this is
where he broke his leg.

Oh.

Take it easy now.

Oh!

Come on Pete, let
me give you a hand.

I think I could
use a whole body.

Here...

Ow!

Thanks.

So, uh...

Level with me, MacGyver.
How am I doing so far?

Better than bill foy.

Next stage is over here.

Oh, that workout this
afternoon wasn't bad enough.

Now we've got to put
up with lousy weather.

Oh... oh...

I'm going to sleep right here.

On my pack.

And if I need anything
more to eat than this orange,

I'll eat my shoe.

If I can get it off.

Oh. Has it really come to this?

Oh... middle age,
fallen arches...

Blisters.

And now acute humiliation.

Well, there's no
reason to be humiliated.

This is a tough course.

Yeah. And I'm washing out on it.

I saw you writing
in that notebook.

Don't you think the
first day is a little early

to be judging
something like this?

That's just the point.

It is only the first day.

Look Pete, the only thing
you should be concerned with

Right now is finding some
food and bedding down.

Don't patronize me, MacGyver.

I don't think I can stand that.

You think that's what I'm doing?

No. I think that's what
you're trying not to do.

You know I asked
for this recertification...

Before you got rotated
off the assignment.

Why?

Because if I am
going to wash out...

I want to do it in
front of a real friend.

Pete, if the absolute
worst happened,

and they reclassified
you out of field operations,

where would you transfer?

I wouldn't.

I'd retire.

Yeah. You tried that
once before, remember?

It took you two days and
you were climbing the walls.

You might as well just admit it,

you were not
meant to be inactive.

Hmm...

Besides,

you're too valuable to
the Phoenix foundation.

Well, that's just it, see?

Because I still feel valuable.

I know I'm valuable.

I mean, if I can't go out
into the field, and actually

do some real good...

What does it all add up to?

Besides, what would
you do without me?

To bail you out
of all the trouble

you're so good at getting into.

That's a good question.

Yeah.

And in keeping
with that sentiment...

What do you say we go
gather some nuts and berries?

And some more wood.

Attaboy, never say die!

You betcha! Full speed ahead.

Blisters and all.

Oh!

What is it?

Not good.

From the condition
of the bodies,

they couldn't have crashed
more than ten or 12 hours ago.

Look at that.

Camera mountings.

"Breck Taylor.

Drug enforcement

- administration..."
- Air surveillance.

Gotta be.

Oh... what a waste.

Hey, Pete, take a
look at this engine.

Or what's left of it.

Well, the whole exhaust
system has been blown away.

That's the hottest
part of the plane.

Are you thinking

what I'm thinking?

Heat-seeking missile?

Yeah, I'd be willing to bet

these guys were
shot out of the sky.

Well, you know they're
gonna send out search planes.

I mean, if whoever
did this is still out there,

it could happen again.

Yeah, well, we can
forget that radio.

The crash pretty much fried it.

There wouldn't be
enough juice in that battery

to transmit very far anyway.

Listen, we've got to notify
somebody, somehow.

I know, Pete.

The problem is, it's a
three-day trek out of here.

Well, if they were
photographing when they crashed,

this camera ought to let us know

what they were looking at.

Yeah... if we had some
way to develop the film.

Do we?

Well I'll need
some battery acid,

which I can get
from the plane...

Potassium bromide, bicarb...

Well, we can get those
from the first aid kit.

Ammonia capsules.

They'll be in the kit, too.

And I can use the juice
from one of your oranges.

Orange juice?

MacGyver, come on,
that... That's amazing.

Are you sure that's gonna work?

Nope.

I covered the bodies
the best I could.

Wish I could have done more.

How's it going?

Well, it's been long enough.

Let's try it.

Now it's gonna go dark in
a few seconds, so look fast.

That's a lake, and a seaplane...

Two men, running.

Look, one of them's
holding something.

Maybe the missile launcher.

Right there.

That's where they
fired the missile.

The rest of them are blank.

We're looking at
high-tech munitions,

cold-blooded murder,
and a DEA plane.

It smells like a heavy
drug operation to me.

Yeah, well, this is
the right area for it.

It's perfect.

The only lake around here

that's big enough to support

a seaplane is crystal lake.

Well, how far is it?

About six hours,
over rough terrain.

You up to it?

Well, I have to be.

Have you got a plan?

I think we should try
to get to their plane

and radio for help.

Oh, that's simple enough.

Tough part's getting there.

I'm not gonna slow you down.

Okay.

Looks like
the one in the picture.

That's definitely
headed towards crystal lake.

From the direction, I'd say it
was coming from the open sea.

Mother ship operation?

Yeah, they're getting very
popular on the west coast.

Someone's gonna come looking
for that plane we shot down.

It's been almost 24 hours now.

I say you call in
your distributor

and we get this
thing over with now.

We have two more
runs to make to the ship.

My people are expecting
1,800 kilos in that cave.

If their customers get a
partial delivery, they'll kill us.

Is that simple enough for you?

This operation was
supposed to be undetectable!

The very best.

You know, I'm gonna
tell you, crandall.

I don't like how this is going.

I hired you to fly, and
that's what you'll do.

Now let's get it done.

MacGyver!

I know I said I wouldn't
hold you up, but I got to stop.

Just for a minute.

Well, we got 'em.

There's a seaplane
on the south shore.

Looks like they're
getting ready to leave.

So what do we do?

They could be making

another run.

I say we check out their camp.

We could be there in
a... Quick, two-hour hike.

You know, I would think,

out of respect for an older man,

and your superior,

You would have the common
decency to be a little bit winded.

Let's pack 'em a
little higher this time

and get it over with.

Yeah, I'll go for that.

Looks like the plane
was moored here.

Well, there's no campfire,

ashes, anything.

I say we look

For a stash.

Now I like that, Pete.

You're thinking like a smuggler.

Well, the brain is
the last thing to go.

Yeah, what's the first?

Uh, can't remember.

All right.

We'll radio on the way back.

Have the next load on the
launch by the time we land.

Hey, Pete...

It's a generator.

Here... Take my flashlight.

Here, let me get your light.

No one home, huh?

Well, let's take a look.

Well... look what they've
got behind door number three.

Talk about a stash.

There's got to be
more than a ton here.

Yeah, I'd be willing to bet
somebody's coming back.

Whoa!

That's coke.

Must be $50 million worth here.

Take one of these
along for evidence?

Yeah. Good idea.

Do you hear that?

What?

Listen.

Let's get out of here.

Pete... wait a minute.

They've still got to unload.

Let's hide down in there.

When they're both
in the storage area,

Let's make a move to the plane.

All right.

Right there.

Turn off your light!

Crandall!

Someone's been here!

You hear me?

Get in here!

Pete!

Suck it up.

Suck it up!

I am.

Wilcox! Over here.

Let's go, Pete!

There's two guys.

Could be d.E.A.

Whoever it is, they're
not getting away.

Stay here and cover 'em.

Looks like this is
as far as it goes.

Get ready to run.

Get down, Pete!

Pete?

Yeah...

Pete.

Yeah.

You okay?

Oh... ow! Ow.

I'll live.

I'll hurt, but I'll live.

Sealed tight.

MacGyver, we would need wings

to get up to that hole.

Maybe not.

I think I can work a route.

There's still a chance
we can stop 'em,

If we get out of here together.

Are you suggesting

that I climb that?

One step at a time, Pete.

Let me have your hammer.

You and your heavy artillery.

You know you're lucky

you didn't bring the whole
mountain down on us.

Quit your whining.
Let's just get it done.

Grappling hook, right?

Right.

I was afraid of that.

Good job.

Oh, thanks.

Told you I could do it.

All right, Pete.

I want you to wait until I get
over there till you start out.

Yeah, sure.

Oh, one more thing, Pete.

Yeah?

Don't look down.

Okay.

All right, Pete, nice and easy.

That's it...

Take it slow...

Come on, fatso, you can do it.

You said you could
do it, now do it!

What's that?

Nothing, I'm all right.

Come on, a little more.

Come on.

You've got it.

Attaboy!

See?

That wasn't so bad, was it?

No. It was fine.

One more pitch from that ledge

- and we're out of here.
- Great.

So uh, when do your
customers pick up the stuff?

Early in the morning.

By then we should
be sitting in my office.

When they find the
coke they radio us

and uh, we collect our piece.

This next part might
be a little tricky.

You mean uh, compared to the
day at the beach we've had so far?

Yeah.

Piece of cake.

All right, Pete, it's your turn.

It's kind of a rough go.

Give it a shot.
You got to do it.

Yeah, sure.

Give it a shot.

- Oh!

Hang in there, Pete.

Oh.

Thanks.

I did it!

Yeah, you did.

All right, give me your hand.

Did you hear something?

No...

Take a look.

See you up top.

Yeah.

Okay, you ready, Pete?

Yeah.

Hold it! I hear company.

Catch!

What?

Oh!

You see anything?

Nothing.

Well, then get
down here. Let's go.

Yeah, yeah.

Pete.

Yeah?

Pete?

What?!

- You okay?
- Yeah.

But I missed the rope.

What? Where is it?

It's 30 feet down.

Oh, man.

Can you reach me?

No.

It's too far.

You're gonna have to climb.

All right.

Here I come.

That's right. Come on.

There's a foothold
right by your right foot.

Where are they?

So we're finally back
to your simple plan, eh?

Yeah, I think I know
how to do it, too.

How did I know that?

We got to get them
both away from the plane

at the same time.

I'll make my way
down to the lake,

get their attention, then
head in that direction.

I'll try not to lose them.

And while you take
them for a stroll, I'll make

the call on the plane radio.

Yeah. Once you do
that, get out of there.

- I'll meet you back here.
- Right.

Now give me your coat.

My coat?

MacGyver, it...

Never mind.

I don't want to know.

Give me a hand.

- Hey, look.
- What?

There he is! Get him!

There!

Phoenix outpost. Come in.

Phoenix, come in please.

This is Phoenix base. Go ahead.

Phoenix. Listen carefully.

This is Peter Thornton.

Crystal lake, south shore.

- Aw...
- What?

One of them's still back there.

Your friend's not here.

I shot him.

He wasn't, uh,

Built for heroics.

You know,

you've caused me
an awful lot of trouble.

Well, we tried.

Pete!

Does this count towards
my recertification,

Or do I have to go
back to macgyverland?

You just saved
the teacher's life.

Of course you passed.

DEA is really high on you two.

The rumor is, they're thinking

Of giving you medals.

Medals?

I had my heart set

on a chocolate shake
and a cheeseburger.

Well, I'm glad to see

you still have your
sense of humor.

Since the rest of
me is lost forever, you mean?

We'll get you out of
here in the chopper

As soon as it's gassed up.

Anything I can do for
you in the meantime?

Could you arrange to
have me put to sleep?

Oh, come on, Pete,
it's not that bad.

Nah.

I'll live.

I owe you big.

If it wasn't for you,

I wouldn't still be a
certified field agent.

That's important to me.

Well, just consider it a down
payment on an old debt of mine.

What debt?

All the years I've
looked up to you.

Yeah?

You never told me that.

Huh... hey.

You know, I lost
six pounds out there.

I may start dating again.

Oh, nurse.