MacGyver (1985–1992): Season 3, Episode 5 - Fire and Ice - full transcript

MacGyver: A man once said,

"When you make a friend,
you take on a responsibility."

And I guess that describes
my friend, Danny Barrett.

When he invited me to
lunch, I should have known

there'd be strings attached.

Excuse me, guys.

Sorry.

Sure. Go ahead.

( Laughing )

MacGyver, you're just in time.

Time for what?



You said lunch.

No, later, okay?

You know what's
going on in here?

A jewelry safe
cracked like an egg.

Another few million in
precious stones are gone.

They're out of here,
good-bye, you know?

Same m.O. As
the heists in Dallas,

New Orleans, Chicago.

And guess who's getting
hit in the pocketbook?

My good client,
pacific metropolitan.

But I know who's
pulling the heists.

I've been tracing this guy

halfway across the
country, you know?

He leaves town after each heist.



No strain, no pain.

Nobody hot on his
tail, and you know why?

'Cause the thief is a diplomat.

Yeah. He's the
ganubian cultural attaché,

and I'm betting a new Porsche

that the diamonds are
stashed in the consulate.

- Danny!
- What, what?

You're an insurance
investigator.

This is heavy stuff.

Have you talked to the police?

Oh yeah, sure, and wave
bye-bye to my new Porsche.

Which I'm gonna buy
with the bonus I get

when I get the proof.

Which is why I asked you here.

How'd I get so lucky?

'Cause you taught
me everything I know

About computer hacking.

My car's down here.

- Computer hacking?
- Mm.

What's computer hacking
got to do with diamonds?

Ah, see, I figured

the consulate computer
would have files

on this cultural attaché,

so I figured out a way
into their computer.

I don't think that's
such a good idea.

In fact, it's kind of dumb.

No, wrong. It was brilliant.

'Cause when I
accessed the main menu,

and I punched up
the attaché's name,

I mean, the thing lit up.

Lists of diamonds,

dates of shipments.

- Hold it! Wait a minute.
- What? What?

Are you trying to tell me

some thief put all that
information into a computer?

Total arrogance. I mean,

to him it was just good
record-keeping, you know?

I mean, who's gonna touch him?

The guy's a diplomat.

All right, look.

What exactly was
in the computer?

I just got a quick look,
then I got shut out.

That's an intercept program.

Danny, they're probably
onto you already.

No way.

I just need your help

to hack my way back
into the computer.

I got my computer set up

To receive the information
back at the office.

I even have the code word
that gets me into his program.

- ( Car engine roaring )
- Blue ice.

- ( Squealing tires )
- Danny!

( Tires squealing )

( Engine revving )

No!

( Danny screams )

( Whispers ): Blue ice.

( Organ music
plays solemn music )

Good-bye.

Our senior year,

class voted Danny
the most reckless...

And the most irresponsible,

but everybody loved him.

( Whispers ): I'm
gonna nail 'em, Pete.

The diamond thief did this.

You know it, I know it,
and I'm gonna nail him.

MacGyver, wait a minute.

Walk away from this
for a couple of days.

Let the police handle it.

That truck didn't have
license plates on it.

The police are
calling it a hit-and-run.

Help me on this, Pete.

( Laughs )

Well, I can't say no, can I?

Where do we start?

We need the name

of the ganubian
cultural attaché.

Thornton: His
name is Amir sumal.

( Low, indistinct chatter )

He has quite a reputation

for his brutal way
of doing things,

Both in politics
and his personal life.

A dangerous man.

He's hosting a big reception

for the city's wealthiest
art patrons at the consulate,

but access is a
tough nut to crack.

Nobody gets in
without an invitation.

Step inside.

Invitation, please, hmm?

Man: Step inside.

Invitation please, hmm?

Step inside.

Inside.

( Car doors closing )

Man: Step inside.

( Gasping )

Oh, my darling!

I haven't seen you since cannes,

or was it majorca?

Oh, yes, yes, I think

It was majorca. How silly of me.

You will save me a
dance, won't you, please?

MacGyver: Pete had learned

that sumal's office
was located upstairs.

The computer had to be there.

Sumal was at the party,

so what I needed
was a way upstairs.

( Smooth jazz plays )

Woman: Amir sumal!

Sumal: Excuse me.

Woman: What a great pleasure.

I've been looking
forward to meeting you.

Well, thank you for coming.

I meant to ask you.

Your magnificent necklace...

Is it an heirloom?

( Jazz continues
playing inside )

I'm sorry, staff only.

( Low, indistinct
party chatter )

Man: We have the
place in Geneva.

( Smooth jazz
continues playing )

( Low, indistinct chatter )

( Music playing in next room )

( Computer beeps,
keyboard clicking )

( Jazz playing,
indistinct party chatter )

( Computer keys clicking )

( Tray sliding on table )

( Lock clicking )

( Muffled gasps )

Easy, easy, take it easy.

I want to make a deal with you.

If you don't scream,
I don't scream.

How about that?

Okay? Can I trust you?

Mm.

All right, I want
you to turn around,

very, very slowly...

( Grunts )

( Groans )

Ow.

All right, who are you?

It'll come to me.

What have you got in your bag?

- Woman: Just this.
- ( Gun cocks )

Now, who are you?

Do we really need the gun?

Will you just
answer the question?

I'm impatient.

All right. You want the truth?

I'm somebody who
shouldn't be here.

( Key jangling )

Like you, I bet.

Man: What are you doing here?

Oh. Hello.

Obviously, we were looking

For a little privacy.

Yes.

My fiancée here...
She's a little old-fashioned

About public
displays of affection.

Aren't you, dear?

Move out from behind the desk.

And lift your hands
in the air, hmm?

This is embarrassing.

Croce here.

I need some
backup in the library.

Oh now, really.

Please.

Mr. Sumal would be...

Well, he'd be outraged to see

how you were
treating his guests.

- Move!
- MacGyver: Wait.

Look, we're not really guests.

We're actually
working undercover.

In fact, her gun
is right over there.

( Groans )

Where'd you learn that?

Sunday school.

Oh.

( Beep )

What are you doing?

Finishing up what I started
to do in the first place.

( Doorknob rattles )

Man #2: Croce?

( Whispers ): Outside.

Man #2: Croce, are you in there?

Think you can
rappel in that outfit...

( Clinking )

Man: Okay, take care. Bye.

What's she doing?

That chick is a
real banana boat.

Pulls up in a Ferrari,
leaves in a wagon?

I hate when she does that.

It's all right.

We made an even trade.

I'll take care of it.

( Car engine starting )

( Car engine roaring )

Well, isn't this interesting,

How we run into each
other twice in one day?

Let me guess,

you're an insurance
investigator.

What else?

Danny sure could pick 'em.

I'll take that as a compliment.

( Typing )

( Typing continues )

I thought you might have

Modemed that from the consulate.

Yeah, but it's all scrambled.

I know that this is

a multi-syllabic binary code,

and that the ganubians
use it all the time.

Fact is, I have a decoding
programmer disk in my car.

Why don't you get it,

And we can unscramble
this mess together.

I believe you have my keys.

Allow me.

Be right back.

Okay, put your hands on
the car and spread them.

Let's go, you know the routine.

What do you mean,
I know the routine?

- What's going on?
- You're under arrest for Grand Theft Auto.

Grand theft?! Hold it, wait...

( Grunts )

- let me explain this...
- Just keep your hands on the car,

Keep your mouth shut,
and do what you're told.

I've got identification.

This is not a stolen car.

Oh, this is your car?

- Well no, not exactly...
- "Well, no."

Save it, lowlife.

The owner called it in,

described you to a tee.

The owner?

That's what I said.

So, would you like
to try a new story?

I love a good story.

( Horn honks )

"You have the right
to remain silent.

"If you give up the
right to remain silent,

"anything you say can
and will be used against you

"In a court of law.

"You have the right to
speak with an attorney..."

( Computer beeps )

Wow.

Diamond grades.

Yes! Yes, yes, yes.

( Computer beeps )

So you're MacGyver?

Yeah. How'd you know?

Oh, the police told me.

Listen, I want to compliment you

on that wonderful little story
you told about the decoder disk.

Nice touch.

Good moves.

You're not still mad
about the car, are you?

Oh, I don't know.

I had to drag one of my
best friends downtown

to bail me out.

And then had to
explain the whole thing.

'Course I'm a little ticked.

Look...

We kept bumping
into each other, and...

Well, siccing the cops on you

was the fastest
thing I could think of

To get you off my tail.

I'm sorry about the car.

I came here to apologize.

You came here because
you can't break the code.

You did?

Maybe.

But you're gonna have to come up

with more than a lame
apology to find out.

Danny was my brother.

You're the one that grew up

with his father...

In Georgetown.

Raised there, married
there, divorced there.

That was another lifetime ago.

Look, why didn't you
just say something to me

in the first place?

I had no idea who you were.

I thought you were another
one of Danny's flaky friends.

Look, I came here

to find out who killed him.

And I figured I was
better off working solo.

You a cop?

No.

But I, I've had
that kind of training.

Danny did mention

that his sister had
gone to a law school,

and worked for a senate
subcommittee in Washington...

Why'd you leave?

Well, my heart
wasn't in it anymore.

So I figured I'd come
back here and see Danny.

He was all I had.

I tried to tell him he
was in way over his head.

But he had his heart
set on breaking this case.

He wanted to be...

Important.

Danny was important.

Look...

I know some things,
you know some things.

What do you say
we put them together

And show Mr. Sumal he
can't get away with murder?

I think I'd like that.

I think I'd like it a lot.

Thornton: MacGyver, I
don't know what you mean.

This is not proof.

What is this?

It's a list of the
diamonds sumal stole.

Valuations, descriptions...

They're still in that consulate.

Danny was right, they
haven't been shipped yet.

They're still sitting there,
all $10 million worth.

We can't get a search
warrant for that place;

it's foreign soil.

Listen, let's at least agree

on our dilemma, all right?

Amir sumal could commit murder!

He could kill a nun

in central park at high noon,

and we couldn't touch him.

That's what diplomatic
immunity means.

The man is subject to the laws

of his own land, not ours.

The most we could
do is ship him home.

But, in order to do that,

we would have to catch this man

with the stolen diamonds,

right in the palm of his hand.

Then let's do it.

But how?

Well...

First we're gonna need some
diamonds for him to steal.

Oh, great, well I have a
diamond stickpin I inherited.

Probably worth $600.

Where are we going
to get diamonds

that he would want to steal?

How about the code
room at the consulate?

You want to steal the diamonds
that sumal has already stolen,

so that he, in fact,
can steal them back?

MacGyver: Right.

From what we've
been able to dig up,

this sumal is an
extremely arrogant guy.

He'd be a cinch to set up.

Nikki: It could work.

He loves women, he
loves playing squash,

and he loves diamonds.

You pick the order,
those are his passions.

Well, that's great, but
how are those passions

going to get us into
a secure code room

- in a foreign consulate?
- MacGyver: Wait a minute.

Diamonds. Women.

Squash.

He's got to carry the
key with him, right?

Well...

well, if I could

get into his locker
at the racquet club...

I could make a mold,

to make a copy of our own key.

Of course we're
gonna need some bait.

What kind of bait?

Um...

A diamond.

A very big diamond.

I will be happy to double this

if you tell Mr. Sumal that
he's at my regular table,

and please ask him to move.

Excuse me, sir, but
I'm afraid you are sitting

At a reserved table.

Uh, this is the
lady's regular table.

I beg your pardon?

I'm sorry to trouble
you to move.

Um, I will have a
table cleared and set up

for you in a moment, Mr. Sumal.

My usual.

Thank you.

I hope you don't
think I'm being rude.

No.

Just territorial.

Oh, this is ridiculous.

Won't you please join me?

Come, sit down.

Amir sumal.

Nicole... Nicole De merlier.

De merlier?

But, of course.

I know the name.

Oh?

Everyone knows
the merlier diamonds.

The famous twelve sisters.

It's a shame we
must part with them.

You're selling the sisters?

Why?

Oh, the usual: Money.

( Chuckles )

see, my brother has inherited

the sins of our late father.

Expensive tastes
for wine and women.

Your brother is a
well-known sportsman.

Well, yes, actually, when
he's not busy entertaining.

He lives for squash.

Ridiculous game, though,

chasing that silly
ball back and forth.

It happens to be
my favorite sport.

Oh, no, not really?

- Yes.
- ( Chuckles )

I suppose I'm prejudiced.

You know what?

I'd like to change your mind.

This afternoon.

I'm sorry. I have
an appointment.

Perhaps we can, uh,

Organize this another time?

I have this wonderful idea.

I will accompany you
to your appointment,

and then we'll lunch at my club.

I'd like that.

And where is your appointment?

The diamond exchange.

( Indistinct chatter )

Oh, thank you.

Yes?

Right.

That's them. Places.

Come on, move it!

Let's go.

( Sighs )

( Door buzzes )

Mr. Blane, please
forgive my being late.

No problem.

Well, it's about time.

Claude, let's not make this

any more difficult
than it already is.

Mr. Blane, may I
please introduce you

to a friend of mine, Amir sumal.

Amir, Mr. Blane.

Hi. How do you do?

And my brother, Claude.

The rogue of the family.

I'm here, aren't I?

How you doing?

- Hello.
- I was just

Telling your brother that, uh,

we've already spoken to
some of our best contacts

about your collection, uh,

including the vanderzeals,

and there is considerable
interest, so, uh...

May I see the stone?

Oh, yes, of course.

Oh...

Wonderful.

Such fire.

No noticeable flaws.

And approximately

10.3 karats.

The ninth sister of twelve.

Now we'll just deposit
this in the vault,

and we'll wire a
check to your bank.

This is, uh...

- ( Taps glass )
- Unbreakable glass, of course.

And it means that our

secure viewing room

and the vault are
visible at all times.

Simpson?

Our, uh, ultimate
security precaution.

They're gorgeous.

May I take a closer look?

Well, that's a
little bit unusual,

but, uh...

Since it's you, miss
De merlier... please.

Thank you.

This shipment is
going to Tiffany's.

And, uh...

These are consigned

To the winwood gallery.

I think we got a
good price, Nikki.

Have my share transferred
to the Melbourne account.

I'll be at a tournament
down there.

Squash?

I told you, it's his obsession.

Distraction, my dear,

merely a distraction.

Do you play, Mr. Sumal?

In fact, I just
invited your sister

to lunch at my club.

Oh, how nice.

How about if I
invite myself along?

Maybe have a couple
of games before lunch.

( Sighs ): Claude.

I'll even buy,

Now that we have cash.

Amir...

Do you mind?

Delighted, my dear.

Shall we?

( Squash balls ricocheting )

Shall we proceed with the game?

Amir, may I have just a
brief word with my brother

before you destroy him?

Family matters.

I'll see you there.

- Give me the key.
- I didn't get it.

What do you mean,
you didn't get it?

What do you mean, what
do I mean... I didn't get it.

I couldn't get him
away from his locker.

I thought you were
supposed to be good at this.

So did I.

Now what do we do?

It's locker number twelve.

What's that supposed to mean?

That means, I play squash,

And you play "find the key."

Not me, MacGyver,

it's the men's locker room.

MacGyver!

♪ You take the high road,
and I'll take the low road ♪

♪ and I'll get to
Scotland before ye ♪

♪ for me and me true
love will never meet again ♪

♪ on the Bonnie, Bonnie
banks of loch lomond... ♪

( Man humming )

♪ ...on the steep, steep
side of Ben lomond ♪

Where the deep purple
hills, the highland...

Man: ♪ mmm, ba-ra-ra-rum-bum ♪

♪ rum-ta-tum, rum-bum ♪

♪ la-da-Dee, uh... ♪

Man: ♪ ma-da-da-da,
da-dum, buh-bum-buh-bum ♪

♪ buh-bum-buh-bum,
rum-puh-pum-pa-pa-pum-bum ♪

♪ rum-puh-pum-pa-pa-pum-bum,
rum-pum-ba-bum ♪

♪ bum bumba-bum bum bum. ♪

Whatever happened to a
good old-fashioned bar of soap?

Man: ♪ I dream of
Jeannie with the light... ♪

Do you mind if I
borrow the soap?

Oh. Not at all.

♪ I dream of Jeannie
with the light brown hair ♪

♪ Borne like a vapor
on the summer air... ♪

( Grunts softly )

( Man humming )

♪ La-la-Lee, la-la... ♪

- ( Agonized yell )
- Point, game and match.

( Seabirds crying )

I got to admit, you sure know

how to make a good impression.

This key's gonna work out fine.

You did a fair job.

You know, I got myself invited

to the ambassador's reception.

Now, I would hardly
rate that a "fair job."

Okay. Fair plus.

So... my plan?

Actually, I've
got a better idea.

Your rolls Royce...
Amir's dumbwaiter.

Nicole De merlier.

Man: There's more in the truck.

Come on, let's go.

All right.

Your excellency, I felt a small
reception would be appropriate.

I can endure it, Amir,
but in future, please,

let us tend to business.

Nikki: Amir, darling!

Oh, uh, miss De merlier,

I'd like you to meet
ambassador vulnay.

Miss Nicole De merlier.

An honor, sir.

( Low, indistinct chatter )

This is wonderful!

The impressionists
have such style.

And this renoir...

Nicole, you amaze me.

I Cherish beautiful things.

Especially valuable ones.

Like this degas.

Or a truly thoughtful man
who sends his security people

to see that I
arrive here safely.

Security?

I saw him keep an eye
on you, or us, at the café,

then at the diamond exchange.

He escorted me
to your front gate.

Security?

Call up the gate camera
on the gallery monitor.

I feel very safe with you.

Of course you are, my dear.

Shall we rejoin the party?

( Beep )

MacGyver: A sym-com
variable combination lock.

The kind that requires each
button to be punched only once.

No key was gonna open that.

But I had an idea.

If they used all six buttons,

the chances of guessing
the right combination

was about seven-twenty to one.

Narrowing down the odds

was a simple matter of
bringing tell-tale fingerprints

to the surface.

( Blows lead on buttons )

Three buttons had fingerprint.

That got the odds
down to one in six.

Then it was a matter of running
through the six combinations

till I got the right one.

( Soft beeping )

( Lock opening )

Math and science
do prove useful.

Out!

( Car door slams shut )

Fortunately, the
ambassador leaves tonight.

So we will have
tomorrow to ourselves.

Well, I think that
sounds positively...

lovely.

Amir, darling, come
here. Good-bye.

( Kissing )

And thank you for a
perfectly splendid afternoon.

( Laughing )

Amir, you're wicked.

Now, now, now, you don't want
to keep the ambassador waiting.

Somehow I just know we're
going to become much closer.

( Engine starts up )

In case you didn't know,

my country executes spies,

Mr. Keach, Charles keach!

I'm not a spy, I'm a
private investigator.

Listen, I didn't
mean any offense

to you or your country.

Oh, but I do take offense.

First you invade
my personal life,

and for some reason, you
seem to have a fascination

for my friend, miss De merlier.

First off, her name
isn't De merlier.

It's carpenter.

Secondly, I'd hide
the family silver

If I were you.

What do you mean?

Your lady friend's

a high-class thief.

In the past month,

she's pulled off two jobs.

Cash and stones
worth about three mil.

It's my guess you're
being set up for a hit.

( Laughs )

I don't

believe this!

She greased the maitre d'

at the café.

Oh, that's classic!

Got under your skin

to get herself
inside the consulate.

What did she do
while she was here?

Well, we talked,
and we looked at...

The art collection.

( Laughs )

Oh, she's an expert in
anything worth money.

Art, jewelry, rare coins.

Oh, the lady's got
a lot of interests.

You are in greater peril

than you think.

One of the degas is missing.

Bingo!

Okay.

All the gear's in the Van.

Pete's on his way
to the consulate.

There's just one question.

Will it work?

Are you having a problem

with my plan?

Just one, it's not mine.

So what's the problem?

Where is it?

My purse.

Aw, Nikki, doggone it,

you just couldn't leave
it alone, could you?

Move.

I had a very
interesting discussion

with a Mr. Charles keach.

Knows you remarkably well.

And suspect that you're here

Planning something illegal.

And I can see clearly

that you plan to Rob

the blane diamonds.

Now, you used the diamonds

you sold them to gain entrance.

But how did you
take these photos?

My purse doubles as a camera.

I would like to thank you

for providing me with
such an extensive plan.

MacGyver: Hey
wait a minute, hold it!

Do you know how to pick

a variable-induction
electronic lock?

Do you know the guard schedule?

The alarm system? Huh?

It may take me a little
time to study your plan,

but... I'm in no hurry.

Blane diamonds are.

They take off tomorrow.

Early.

You are implying

That I couldn't manage
this little venture without you.

You catch on real quick.

Partners.

( Weakly ): Help me.

Please... ( Grunts )

Help me.

Oh...

( Door buzzes )

- Easy, lady.
- Oh!

I've got you.

Oh, somebody!

Oh, god.

Okay.

Call the police.

Just hold on, hold on.

Wait!

- ( Gunshot )
- ( Grunts )

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

( Latch clicks )

( Clasps snap )

( Beeping )

( Louder beep )

( Latch clicks )

Let's do it.

♪ ♪

( Extinguisher emitting )

King's ransom.

I commend you both.

You're everything

Mr. Keach said you were.

I'd like to thank you

For making this a very
profitable partnership.

Short-lived as it was.

I'll take that.

Now, move over there.

What are you doing?

Taking my half and yours.

You would do the same.

Turn around and face the wall.

I could shoot you,

but that would be so vulgar.

It's so much more poetic

to execute you in
your own gas chamber.

( Hissing )

( Hissing )

Cover your nose and mouth.

( Coughs )

( Coughing )

How is it that we just knew

he'd do something like that?

Human nature.

( Nikki coughing )

( Coughing continues )

( Hissing stops )

( Beeps )

Let's go.

To the consulate.

( Door buzzes )

Well done, Fred.

MacGyver: Okay, Charlie,
let's hit the consulate.

Your excellency.

Mr. Blane?

I'm not Mr. Blane.

My name is Peter Thornton.

And you're not a diplomat.

You're a thief

- and a murderer.
- What on earth...

Mr. Thornton came here

To formally accuse you
of serious crimes, Amir.

I, on your behalf,

have demanded proof.

And still do.

Well, go ahead, search him.

Start with the attaché case.

( Engine shuts off )

Mr. Ambassador, I'm
telling you, this man is a thief.

That case is full
of stolen diamonds.

- Search him.
- Enough!

Your excellency, you cannot

permit this.

I have diplomatic immunity!

Truly...

There can be

no search.

Amir: Gentlemen, I have
business to attend to.

Will you excuse me, please?

This one's for Danny.

( Device beeps )

Arrest him!

I do like working
with you people.

You can't prosecute me.

You can't even hold me.

Security!

Your excellency!

What does this
mean, your excellency?

Justice! American justice!

I claim American justice!