MacGyver (1985–1992): Season 1, Episode 10 - Target MacGyver - full transcript

MacGYVER: Now, this is what
goin' to the beach is all about.

( women shouting)

Boy, there's some fine-lookin'
women out there, huh?

You got those binoculars?

Yeah, in the kitchen.

MacGYVER: On the other hand,

rescuin' a lady general

has never been my
idea of beach fun.

( doorknob rattles)

All right, let's see what
we've got to work with.

Okay, this seems
to be a good start.



All I need is a few
seconds of distraction.

Oh, man,

look at that!

Oh, I gotta go outside
and check this out.

What the...?

Hey, let's go! Come on!

Who's in there?

Hey!

( grunting)

I'll bet you didn't tell them
a thing, huh, General?

Let's get you outta here.

Handcuffs! Damn!

( men grunting and shouting)

( grunting)



She's gone!

( both yell)

( grunting and gasping)

Stay! Sit! Stay!

Good dogs.

Yeah, Packman? MacGyver.

You know that lady
general you lost?

Well, I found her.

MacGYVER: I really
have to rethink my life.

I hardly get the lady
general back to the Pentagon

when I get a Code Red priority.

So, here I am on a moonlit
night starin' down the throat

of a brand-new Middle
Eastern nuclear refining plant

put on this good Earth
for no other reason

than to allow some
crazy strong man

to blow up his neighbors.

Guess what Washington
asked me to do.

All right, ready to blow it.

Be at the pickup zone at 0430.

All right.

Home... enough is enough.

I will not, under
any circumstances

for any reason whatsoever
answer the phone...

probably... again.

Yes, I am definitely home.

Well?

I just dropped in
to congratulate you.

Thank you very much.

The Department is grateful.

You're welcome.

And I'm very tired.

I'm not offering
you an assignment.

I'm giving you a warning.

You're a target.

Now, that I'd like spelled out.

When you put away that
nuclear installation, they ID'd you.

The contract went
out the next day.

They hired Axminster.

He took out Sheikh
Hussein, didn't he?

Right in the middle of prayers.

Blew him straight to Allah

and killed 37 others
along the way.

You oughta get out of town
while we, uh, stake this place out.

Barney, I like to take
care of my own messes.

MacGyver,

Axminster would torch the
whole block just to get you.

Now, I can set up a
safe house, full security,

unless, uh, you've got someplace

you'd like to settle in
for a couple of weeks.

You know, there is a kind of a,

a trip I've been toying with.

Take it now.

As long as it spells
one word: "lost."

( sighs)

I guess I do owe a visit.

To who?

It's personal, Barney.

Okay, just tell me if and where.

I'll handle that, Colonel,

and you don't
need to know where.

You just take care of Axminster.

Take a look at this!

What?

It says this here lady
was attacked by aliens

and had an alien baby.

No kiddin'?

Yeah. In Alabama somewhere.

Big on aliens in Alabama.

No lie.

Full of strange people.

That's why I'm goin' North,

back to see my
family for a while.

Makes sense.

MacGYVER: I hadn't seen
my grandfather since I was ten.

He was all the
family I had left,

and we were strangers.

( phone ringing)

MacGYVER: Hi. MacGyver here.

When you hear the beep, let
me know what's on your mind.

( beep)

JACKSON: I'll let you know
what's on my mind, bud.

Pick up that phone
and talk to me.

I got no mind for machines.

Oh, damn, I guess
you aren't there!

This is your...

This is Harry Jackson.

The-the clerk from
the general store

brung me up a note
with this phone number.

He says you're
comin' to visit me.

Axminster!

JACKSON: And I
just want to say...

don't come.

I'm busy.

Ah, hell, you're probably
on the way here already.

You can phone the
general store again.

It's area code 303, triple-five,
double-seven-oh-two.

I'll try and run that
down right away.

MacGYVER: What a
beautiful part of the world.

Has everything but people.

I got to wonder what
happened to my grandfather

that made him decide
to live in such isolation.

Actually, I wonder

if he'll even be
here to meet me.

WOMAN: There he is...

WOMAN: Well, hop in.

Hi, Harry.

How'd you know?

I never forget a grandfather.

You've grown.

Well, it's been, what,
six, 17, 18 years, hasn't it?

I hadn't noticed.

Didn't get my message to you.

I tried to head you off.

You mind that I came?

( bird squawking)

Ah, what the hell. You're here.

Well, come on.

I want to get home before dark.

Headlights don't work.

You haven't changed.

Haven't had to,
and I don't plan to.

All Right.

( seagull cawing)

All right.

Okay.

Thanks a lot.

The number's a general store

in a little town in
Colorado... Ouray.

Harry Jackson
doesn't have a phone,

but they know him, Axminster.

They know where he lives.

( truck thudding)

You trying to throw
me or just scare me?

You always did like to talk.

Still tough as a dirty
boot, aren't you?

You're damn right.

( door squeaking and closing)

Well?

Black, hot and strong, right?

Nothin' wrong with
your memory, bud.

Grandma used to say

you'd never drink
a cup of coffee

unless a spoon
would stand up in it.

Grandma never did give
up trying to civilize me.

I guess maybe

that was the only dumb
mistake she ever did make.

Except maybe dyin'.

Is that why you left us?

You always did
get right to the point.

Haven't changed.

Not much.

Want coffee?

Yeah.

You didn't answer me.

I left...

because it was time to leave.

No, when Dad
died, you were there.

I mean, you were...
you were there.

I stayed around

for a while.

God, for the love of Mike, boy,

I still had the right
to my own life!

Doggone it, Harry,

I guess maybe
it's... how you did it.

I wake up one morning,
and you're gone.

I never liked good-byes.

I

Took a job workin'

in construction up in Alaska.

Good job.

New country.

So I went.

I figured sending money
regular would be more use

to you and your
mother than I was.

You figured wrong.

That's your bunk.

Leave or stay, it's up to you.

We're ready to roll, Axminster.

( engines starting)

How do you want
this guy MacGyver?

Dead or alive?

Dead.

( birds singing)

It's good.

Now, why are you here?

I guess I just got
past puttin' off this visit.

I haven't thought
about family in years.

Don't really want to now.

Harry, were you
always this hard-nosed?

Even when I was a kid?

( sighs)

I remember this.

JACKSON: Uh...

Didn't I make this for
you when I was about ten?

For your birthday or something?

( quacking)

It works good, too.

Best I ever had.

CARSON: Cabin's at the
top of the ridge, Axminster.

Then spread out.

We'll surround the
cabin and hit 'em.

So, you ready for some fishin'?

I already been.

What do you think
we're havin' for breakfast?

Come on, Harry.

You're the one
that used to tell me

you don't fish for
fish, you fish for fishin'.

CARSON: Cabin's
empty, Axminster!

( birds singing)

Nice.

Yeah, it's real nice.

Found this place
about eight years ago.

I'm stayin' right
here till I die.

Ah, you're too mean to die.

What goes around comes around.

BLACK: The truck's
still here, Axminster.

They got to be close.

You know, I think Mom
and I missed you most

around Thanksgiving, Christmas.

I remember you used to
take me out to cut a tree.

Stop riding it!

Is my being here

that hard on you?

Bud,

subject is closed.

( fishing line creaking)

I got one.

I got one!

JACKSON: I said
drag, bud. Watch it.

Ah, that's a beaut!

That's for dinner.

Don't let loose of him.

I'm not gonna let loose of him.

Get the net, Harry.

( gunshot)

Hey, what the...?

( gunshots)

Aah!

( gunshots)

What the hell is goin' on?

I'll tell you later. Come on.

Who are your friends?

Harry, I didn't think
they'd find me here.

They'll probably be
down here in a minute.

Let's go!

JACKSON: Hollow reeds?

MacGYVER: Yeah.
We'll make 'em think

we're still out
there in the water.

They're too smart
for that one, boy.

Got to try something.

What if they do fall for
this stunt of yours, bud?

What do we get out of it?

Buy a little distance.

All depends on them
believin' that it's us

breathin' under these reeds.

Have a little faith, Harry.

AXMINSTER: Where
the hell are they?

Down there, those reeds!

Fire!

( rapid gunfire)

You, check it out.

They tricked us.

What are you talking about?

MacGyver set us up.

Let's go tell Axminster.

Guess your friends
found those reeds

over on the other
side of the lake.

See, your grandson's
got something on the ball.

Hold it, Harry.

It's a plant from
the Urtica family.

Strong stuff.

One dab in the bloodstream
hits the neural system

and a guy's out for hours.

Blow gun?

I was thinking
along those lines.

Ah.

The only problem we got, Harry,

in order for me
to knock them out,

I'm gonna have to
hit them just right.

Right in the neck.

What if you miss?

Okay, here we go.

HARRY: Now we got a blow gun,

maybe help to make kind
of a trail for them to track us.

BLACK: Hold it.

Their trail leads
down to the stream.

Hey, what's the matter?

Hey, hey, what's...?

( grunting)

( yells)

Nice.

Gotta hit them just right.

Harry, can we get out this way?

Don't seem to
have a lot of choice.

No.

Hold it!

Hold it right there, bud.

Will you stop?

Now wait a minute!

I said hold it right there!

Who are you, bud?

Now what the
devil's all this about?

I ain't moving until
I get an answer.

I'm sorry, Harry.

I shouldn't have come.

I underestimated some things.

Just answer the question.

It has to do

with freedom and peace, Harry.

And some people
who don't like either.

Well, I sure hope

it's worth losing
that damn trout.

They're still alive, Axminster.

Shall we pick them up?

AXMINSTER: Forget them.

Move it.

We got a job to do.

Is there a ranger
station around?

How about a fire lookout,

a ranch, anything?

Ah, let's see.

Evermore, uh, it's a little,

old nothing town, uh, half dead.

Well, now they got a phone line.

How far is it?

Oh, it's ten to 12 miles.

It's up in the high desert.

All right. Let's move.

AXMINSTER: Go that way.

We'll swing around
the hill and meet you.

CARSON: Right.

HARRY: Haven't
done this much running

since two winters ago when
a grizzly was chasing me.

Did he catch you?

HARRY: Nah, got tired
trying to catch an old buzzard.

Hey, what are you doing now?

Stop to collect rocks?

CARSON: Maybe up that way.

AXMINSTER: Okay,
we'll flush them out.

See anything?

MacGYVER: Oh, I
see a lot of things.

Anything I'd be interested in?

Yeah. Two jeeps splitting up.

Only one's heading our way,

but he's gonna be

a while getting here, so I
figure we got a little time.

To do what?

Harry, don't you remember
teaching me all about decoys?

Why don't you fill
that up with branches?

Oh, yeah, and make
it look like a man.

Now let's see if I can get
this tree to do a few tricks.

AXMINSTER: No sign
of them coming this way.

CARSON: Should I keep going?

AXMINSTER: We should
figure out MacGyver.

Then make a decision.

Alpha, Colin, Baker,

do you read?

This is Axminster.

Are targets in sight?

No, sir.

No problem, it's just a little
cat and mouse. Keep moving.

You got your
orders. Over and out.

Okay?

Head up to high ground.

AXMINSTER: Yeah,
it's a nice day for hunting.

Hey, Harry?

Remember you
used to tell me about

how the Indians fought this way?

Bud...

a lot of that stuff

I used to tell you
is, uh, is stories.

Yeah, well, a lot
of it works, Harry.

( Jeep approaching)

( yelling)

Damn.

Thought we'd at least
get a free ride out of this.

Guess we keep on running.

MacGYVER: That's
Axminster. Let's get going.

BLACK: Axminster, the
other jeep, down in the gully.

AXMINSTER: Two more down.

Let's finish this MacGyver now.

You getting lightheaded, bud?

Pinecones?

Sure, Harry.

Don't you remember
ever throwing one in a fire?

What happens?

It kind of explodes.

Yeah, that's right.

Add a little pine pitch and you
got the makings of a landmine.

Ain't Mother Nature grand?

HARRY: You just
trying to stay above them

or you got some kind of an idea?

A little of both.

No, I can manage!

Hold it, Harry.

I figure the Jeep'll
come from there

right through here.

Well, what in the...?

Time to bury the landmine.

HARRY: See something?

MacGYVER: Nope,
but I hear something.

HARRY: Ought to get a move on.

Ah, there's plenty of time.

You sure that'll work?

Nope.

Bud, you are a comfort.

HARRY: Here they come.

Come on, let's go.

When I was a kid, I used to chew

pine pitch like it was gum.

It tasted all right, but
it burned a lot better.

All right.

( rapid gunfire)

( grunting)

Harry?

I'm all right.

Get him!

( yelling)

Come on, Harry,
let's get moving.

AXMINSTER: Can
anybody still move?

CARSON: Yeah, good
enough to find MacGyver.

BLACK: Looks like
we're walking now, too.

AXMINSTER: Not walk, run.

We'll run him right
into the ground.

Well, that's okay.

I'm just dinged.

Yeah, so I noticed.

Just grazed you, Harry.

Could've been worse, you know.

Eh, hurts like worse.

Put that inside.

Put pressure on it.

You all right?

We made it.

Yeah.

HARRY: Hey!

MacGYVER: So...
this is Evermore.

( coughs)

Harry, when was the
last time you were here?

Too long ago.

It's dead.

I guess we are, too.

Harry? Harry! Harry!

Damn you, Axminster.

So, there we were in a
ghost town, Harry and me.

I tried to make him as
comfortable as possible.

What are you trying, bud?

That's fool's gold.

Which contains

pyrite... iron sulfide.

Mixing it up with
a little clay here

kind of makes a
natural antibiotic.

Let's see what you got here.

Just what is it
that you do, bud?

Well, a little of
this, a little of that.

( groans softly)

Well, that... that
sure explains it.

You're going to be okay, Harry.

Ever think of
hanging out a shingle

as a medicine man?

I've got something to say.

I've avoided you.

You know why?

Mom.

First your grandmother.

Then your mom.

When the good Lord took them,

I hurt.

I didn't want to be reminded,

so I just, uh, I
just kept moving.

Seeing you...

I've missed you, bud.

Something terrible.

( softly): Harry...

( sighing)

Well, that... sure
was a sorry sight.

( sniffling)

Hey.

Don't you

ever badmouth my
grandpa, you hear?

( chuckling)

( groaning)

Look, I'm going to try
and find some things

for us to fight with.

What do you say?

You really think they're
going to find us here?

They're professionals, Harry.

They'll find us.

Harry had a good night's
rest, but I didn't sleep at all.

I knew that, with first light,

Axminster would
be tracking us again.

So, I had to build the
best defense I could

before they got to us.

Hey, bud!

Mind telling me
what you're doing?

Yeah, found some grain dust.

Treat it right,

we got the makings
of a pretty good bomb,

I'll betcha.

Might work good.

Got a little parlor trick

to get them to come up close
to where the explosion happens.

Sometimes you hear
about floating grain dust

exploding inside a silo.

It's called spontaneous
combustion.

I'm going to do it on purpose.

And I found a real
handy partner in Harry.

He seemed to be
talking just the way I was.

Or maybe I'd been
thinking like him all along.

HARRY: Only get one shot

with your exploding gadget, bud.

MacCGYVER: What
you got in mind, Harry?

HARRY: A little remote
control distraction.

Guaranteed to get them galoots

to come up real close
for the big surprise.

Hey, bud, I can play
magician from over here!

Now you see it, now
you don't... And boom!

All right, that's enough.

It's shaking,

and I don't want it
falling on my head.

Real trick's going to be

getting those
galoots in position.

MacGYVER: If they aren't

right underneath
it, it won't work.

Where are you going?

HARRY: Come on.

I got a trick of my own.

What do you got, pine nuts?

HARRY: Yeah, I used
to have fun with them

when I was a kid.

I'd, uh, drop them in the fire,

and watch everybody
jump, and they'd crack,

and they'd go off like gunshots.

Well, they've been falling

for your foolishness.

I figured I'd try
some of my own.

I think Harry was
beginning to enjoy the game.

And that's all the time we had.

( clanking)

( men yelling)

( loud popping)

( loud popping)

( man grunts)

Got him good.

Yeah.

We still have Axminster.

Only this time, we got the odds.

Yeah.

Ow!

( grunting)

( gun cocking)

( gunshot)

Try, try to move him over, bud.

( grunting)

Now, bud!

( yelling)

You all right, bud?

I'm more than all right, Harry.

( groans)

Whew!

( both laugh)

You figuring on
coming back this way?

Count on it.

I'll look forward to it.

Me, too.

Hey, Harry...

catch that big
old trout, will you?

Count on it.

Take care of yourself, bud.

( theme music playing)